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Conquering my Fear of Dark Souls

September 1, 2026 01:24:530 comments♥ 0
00:00 For anyone who has watched my other videos, [music] you'll probably know that I have never played Dark Souls. And you know, I personally think it's for a pretty good reason. [screaming] But I can't truly [music] call myself a Souls fan if I never play the Souls game. So today, I'm going to
00:16 stop [music] being a little [ __ ] pull up my big boy pants, and overcome the world of Lordren. [music] The only prior knowledge I had going into the game was really just specific [music] bosses and areas. Basically, I was completely blind. And if you don't know, playing this game is [music] like
00:31 navigating a paddle boat through a hurricane. It's incredibly easy to get lost or stuck [music] or just not know where to go next. So very sparingly, I would look things up just to help keep me on course. But outside of that, I have very little knowledge of the game and it will show. So if you're someone
00:48 who's [music] beaten this game multiple times, you know, you consider yourself a Dark Souls veteran, then this video might infuriate you and I apologize for my [music] own incompetence. As always, I hope you guys enjoy and I will talk to you all later. Okay, bye. [music] We got my goat Snacken ready to go. Uh,
01:11 yeah, he's pretty disgusting. He's pretty hideous. You know, there's a side profile for you. Uh, we're going to be beating Dark Souls. It's that simple. Oh my god, Snagen, you are [ __ ] hideous. Did you see his face? [ __ ] disgusting. Oh god. [ __ ] horrors the likes of which
01:37 you've never seen. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I don't need a [ __ ] tutorial, dude. I know how this game works. All right. I assume it's the same as every other game. Like I said, I do have the master key, but I'm not going to use it to get to like late game areas right away. I just want to use it because I'm lazy.
01:54 Oh, I actually really like how the spider shield looks like a spider logo on my back. I mean, I literally am just Spider-Man. Oh. Oh, you didn't see that coming, did you? Oh, the delay is going to be so hard to get used to. Holy.
02:16 That hits crazy. All right. Well, he's dead. You know, basically no hit if you think about it. I'm going to be doing a strength build, I think, depending on we we'll see, but most likely just going to stick to strength, I think. What the [ __ ] They hit hard as [ __ ] Look at their Look at
02:33 that [ __ ] Oh, I can't move when I flask. Why can't I move when I'm when I flask? That's really annoying. We got the Zhander. That could be a weapon we use. You're alive. He's about a flask, too. Dude, you see
02:51 that [ __ ] bro? You trying to pull a fast one on me? Get that [ __ ] out of here. No. Oh god. [screaming] Why? Why is gravity the hardest enemy? Lock on. Big plunge attack. Hurry. Go before he gets to you. Oh,
03:15 tank it. What a guy. Tanking it like a god. I'm good. Heal up real quick. You lock on. Oh, what? [groaning] Okay. I didn't know he could come up here. That's not good. It's fine. We just got to beat him the
03:36 oldfashioned style. Nice. We're cooking. We're cooking. I just can't lock on. Locking on is the issue. Uh, crazy hitbox, but it's fine. We got him first try. Beautiful as it could ever be. Look at him just chilling.
04:05 He beckoning. That's not That's not what I thought it was. Okay, let me get out of here. Stop embarrassing myself. Oh [ __ ] Okay. Well, he just sent me right back down the stairs. You know, this is, you know, this belongs to you. That's all you, dude. Holy [ __ ]
04:28 Okay, this guy's too complicated for me. I'm not fighting him. Lesson learned. That tower is his. He owns it. [ __ ] poison [music] rats. Thank you, Miyazaki. Okay. Oh, we're off to a beautiful start. Just a gorgeous start, dude. I don't know.
04:48 I'm just way too impatient to be able to enjoy this game. I'm not going to lie. Oh my god. Again, it's still very early on in the game, so I'm going to keep giving it the respect. All right. What does this gate even lead to? Somewhere I have not been. Oh, it's this one. Oh, it makes so much
05:11 sense. Oh god, it makes so much sense. Holy [ __ ] Okay, I see. I see. I see. It actually makes so much sense where I'm at now. I'm I'm getting it. I'm understanding. What the [ __ ] is this guy doing, bro? Oh, claymore. Wait, the claymore could actually be massive. Do I want to use
05:30 the claymore or the zhander? I can already wield the the claymore, so I'm just going to go ahead and equip that for now. Is this going to go right back to Firelink? It's going to blow my mind if it does. Yes. Oh, yes. How awesome is that? That's actually sick. Huge discovery.
05:53 Oh, what the [ __ ] What the hell's going on in here? One of What the [ __ ] is going on in here? What did I miss? [groaning and screaming] Please. He's just dancing. Look at him. Look at him just dancing. What the [ __ ] Is this a boss?
06:19 Oh my god. It is. It's the [ __ ] gargoyless. [ __ ] dude. Oh, weapon. Oh, I cut off his tail. What the [ __ ] I didn't even mean to do that. There's a three swiper big stun right there. You saw that? I mean, you can just feel the age of the
06:56 game, dude. It's so bad. How How can you think that that's fun? I I don't know how anybody could find this fun. Let's at least get this guy out of here. Oh, he's still alive. Just kidding. Oh, we did it. We finally did it. It's done. What a great boss. Incredible. I'm just angry, you know. I am just angry.
07:46 And I am I definitely am just [ __ ] on the boss because I'm a little bit upset that I'm getting skill checked. Let's ring this [ __ ] baby. Hell yeah. First bell has been rung. Good step in the right direction. All right, this is just the beginning. >> Still closed.
08:05 Still closed. Still closed. [laughter] I [ __ ] love Seward. Sie Meer. I'm sorry. His name is Sigmire. Dark Root Garden. A secret hidden little bonfire. That's huge. Okay. Don't kill me. Don't kill me. Please.
08:44 No, dude. Kobe. >> Oh, thank God. Look at that HP. Look at that big firebomb clutch, baby. How about that? Oh my god. Basement key. Finally figured out how to use one of the four [ __ ] keys that I found.
09:07 Just murdered a guy in there, too. Just killing these people, dude. Oh, just went invisible. What the hell? What are you hiding in here? What kind of [ __ ] house is this, dude? This guy just lives here. Don't get stun locked. Don't get trapped in the corner.
09:30 Go, go, go. I frame it. One-shotted instantly by dogs. What is this boss room, by the way? Holy [ __ ] Insane boss room. Oh, this ought to be fun, bro. Where am I? How Like, what is this [ __ ] area, dude?
10:00 I wish I could like actually get a chance to do anything. Like, brother, [laughter] this is the worst boss arena I have ever seen. Like, you might as well just put me in a closet. Can't even get up the stairs because you get body blocked.
10:27 Oh, it's so bad. I wish I could see, but you know, that's just a part of the game that doesn't exist. Luckily, he is very easy. Please. Oh, thank God. Thank [ __ ] God. If he got that [ __ ] off, I would have been pissed.
11:00 Oh my god. Is this going to lead back to the sewers? Is this going to be the other side of the door? Oh my god. Oh, this game is peak. I take it all back. Holy [ __ ] Elite level design. Massive shortcut even. Oh, hello. Oh, well, that's just a little bit unlucky, you know.
11:21 Are you serious, dude? He just did a full 180 on my body. What is that [ __ ] No. No, not again. What the [ __ ] He's putting his [ __ ] ass in my face and then it happens instantly. Instantly, dude, I didn't even get a chance and I just lost all my souls. Wait, I'm still
11:44 alive. I'm still alive. Holy [ __ ] Holy [ __ ] Holy [ __ ] I still have a chance. Oh my god, [laughter] that's so [ __ ] insane. I thought I was dead for sure. Got all my souls back. I I cannot believe I didn't die. Genuinely insane that I didn't die. But, you know, I am the goat. So, is it
12:08 really that insane? Wait, could I pillage his corpse? I could. Haha, I got a sack. Wait a minute. Tell me that's not a helmet. Oh god, I can put a sack over my disgusting head. That's such an important find. We got a sack helmet now. We need that. Be wary of up. Well, I don't like that there's a
12:29 blood stain right there. God damn it. I wish I could see the screen, dude. [ __ ] me. Oh my god. I don't know where the [ __ ] I'm at. Oh, it's these [ __ ] things. Yay. I love the bassilisks. Luckily, the
13:03 poison in this game is pitiful. Unluckily, I just fell for my own trap. Don't do that move. Not in here. Well, god damn it, dude. What? I have half HP now. Why? Why am I cursed? What? What the [ __ ] is
13:34 that garbage? I've already I got killed. Why is this something that is in the game? Oh my god. And I get stun locked instantly. This game is garbage, dude. I've never met anybody that is incapable of taking a step whilst drinking at the same time.
13:55 And the same thing just happened. The exact same thing. Like what is that [ __ ] dude? Oh my god. We're going back to the bell gargoyle so that I can buy a purging stone. so that I can get rid of this stupid [ __ ] curse [ __ ]
14:16 Boom. No more curse instantly. That's huge. All right, we needed to do that. Now we can go back to the depths. Gaping dragon time. It's time to get serious. It's time to lock in. We got to smack his tail. Got to get that tail weapon. How many hits to the tail does it take? [screaming] That many? Hell yeah. We
14:40 [ __ ] got his ass. All right, it's time to lock in now. Smack the [ __ ] out of that little guy. Oh, no tail for you to swipe me with now, buddy. Look at me go. Ow. Oh, that was so close.
15:25 He's almost dead. No tail for you to swipe with. First try. Gaping dragon. Oh my god. Night rain clutch. Oh god, the blight town key. Gaping dragon complete. And now we're on to Blight Town. Oh, yay. Aren't you guys excited for that? We're going to [ __ ]
15:52 Blight Town. Oh, it just got all dark. Oh, it just got really dark and really serious. Uh, I'm not going to drop down there yet. I'm gonna go use my souls first, you know, just in case. We're going to level up and then we're going to go to Blight Town.
16:11 What the hell happened to that guy? That's spooky. Oh, this guy happened. Jump. Oh, what a jump. Big skip. Oh, we got a we got a weapon. Could be big. Could be [music] very big. Oh, and a bonfire. How big is that? I do want to explore a little bit.
16:37 Well, that's not very ideal, but it's fine, I guess. Whoa. [laughter] What the [ __ ] Oh, I didn't even see the little [ __ ] dogs. All right, that's the first blight town death. I have no idea where I'm supposed to be going. It's [ __ ] pitch black. I can't see [ __ ] I don't know how you guys be seeing [ __ ]
17:02 Well, that's just not ideal. Ooh, armor. New cool looking armor. Hold on. Hold on. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. It looks sick. Wait, let me get into the light. All right. Well, there's just no light to be had regardless.
17:26 All right. That's not somewhere I can fall. Lesson learned. Is this just going to take me right back to the bonfire? Where am I supposed to be going? I don't understand. THAT'S NOT WHAT I WANTED TO DO. That's not what I wanted to do.
17:49 [ __ ] dude. That is so stupid. Why do you HAVE TO TAKE A STEP FORWARD to swing your [ __ ] weapon? Why? Yeah, I'm poisoned. Bonfire bonfire. Suck it. Oh, big checkpoint. Big checkpoint. Wait just a minute. Is
18:14 this who I think it is? Is this the boss I think it is? Is this the Ramina ripoff? Is this who I think it is? Weakness chest. Charmer ahead. Imminent chest. Yeah, this is who I think it is. Oh my goodness. What a scary creature. Oh, hideous. Oh, disgusting. Just a gross, disgusting creature. Oh, wait a
18:39 minute. Thank you, Miyazaki. Holy [ __ ] Oh, she's fine as [ __ ] What the hell? That was crazy tracking. Did y'all see that, bro? God, she's so bad. Yo, real question. Would you guys rather have uh Qua lag or
19:06 Ramina? Be honest. Bad play. Okay, whenever she goes down like that means the big explosion is coming. God, she is actually like just unbelievably attractive. No. How do I How am I alive? I'm not going to question it.
19:33 Yep, that's going to kill me. God damn it. All right. Hey, not a bad first attempt. What? What? She has me stuck. I got stuck. What? Oh, I can just stand underneath her attacks. What? I mean, the fact I can just stand under
20:06 her attacks also changes things. I didn't realize that I could just Oh. Sit the [ __ ] down. Sit down. Yeah. Oh, I didn't realize I could just stand under her [ __ ] Bailey attacks. Such a shame that I had to kill her because man man, you know, that's all I got to say about that. And now we're ringing the second
20:45 bell. Big progress, baby. Massive progress. Oh, he's opening the gate for Seward. Holy [ __ ] >> I knew it. >> Oh, I'm sorry. You You were in the way. Ow. Oh, what are these things? What? What?
21:09 What? [laughter] He was in the way. All right. I didn't know it was an NPC. He was in the [ __ ] way. Dude, what do you want me to do? Yeah, probably an important NPC that I just killed. But it's fine. It's all right.
21:23 Oh, who is this? Man, From Software really knows how to make a nice uh lady boss. We're going to go back. We're going to go all the way back to Firelink and we're going to go to that fortress. That's the next move. Seward awaits. Sigmire, I should say, awaits for me. Where art thou, Sigmire?
21:46 This is a pressure plate, right? I mean, look at that. That's like the most obvious pressure plate I've ever seen in my life. What? Are we serious? This is how this area is going to be. Okay. Dude, how do you not get hit right
22:13 there? >> Dude, how do you not get hit right there? Oh, dude. Like, what? Ah, get baited, idiot. I'm actually going to go this way. Yoink. Hello there. WHAT THE [ __ ] IS THAT? WHAT IN THE [ __ ] IS THAT [ __ ] DUDE?
22:44 BOY, this is fun. This is a lot of fun, brother. Come on. What am I What am I supposed to do when these stupid Volcano Manor [ __ ] just corner me in a [ __ ] room and pound my buttle? What do you do about that? Huh? What?
23:10 You don't even have time to get there. What the hell? Oh my [ __ ] god. Like [screaming] [laughter] Oh, it's so goofy. No, [screaming]
23:31 it's right there, dude. [ __ ] this area. This is by far the worst area in the game thus far. Blight Town doesn't hold a candle to this [ __ ] dude. Everybody always talks about how awful Blight Town is. This area is so much worse. This [ __ ] reminds me of the [ __ ] jungle temples in
23:53 Terraria. Am I crazy? They got the lizard people and everything. Oh, little bonfire down here. I [ __ ] knew it. Whoa, [ __ ] nuclear bomb just went off. Hold on. Oh, there's a [ __ ] big boy right there. Don't know if I want to fight that guy. Here we go, baby. [ __ ]
24:13 it. We got our bonfire. We rested at that [ __ ] The iron golem. Wow, my damage is awful. Okay, it's a grab attack. Okay, and that guy's going to throw fire. Okay, you know what? Maybe I am going to
24:38 go up there and kill that [ __ ] If he's just going to chuck [ __ ] firebombs at me the whole [ __ ] time, maybe I should go up there and murder him. [ __ ] you. Sit the [ __ ] down. No more of that stupid [ __ ] [ __ ] Hopefully he doesn't respawn.
24:58 Oh my goodness. Come over here. Pop a heal. Uh-oh. Okay. It takes seven years to heal. Just need to keep walking under his leg. The hell's he doing? What's he doing? Did I what? I'm really confused as to why he's just
25:34 kind of standing there. He just [ __ ] is kind of like dancing around. Whoa. What the [ __ ] Okay. Was not expecting him to just do that. That was a little interesting. Ew. What are these? No. Put me down. Put me down, you
25:59 heretics. Release me at once. I love that they're carrying me like I'm [ __ ] Jesus. Oh, is this an Orlando? Holy [ __ ] it looks so good. Oh my god, it looks beautiful. What the [ __ ] Oh, dude, it looks so good.
26:21 Oh, dude, just admire the view for a second. Holy [ __ ] that's gorgeous. Tough enemy ahead. More like easy ass gargoyle ahead. Yeah, I've already fought one of these guys. What? He didn't even do a move. He just moved and it killed me. What the hell? Don't push me off. Oh my goodness. That
26:46 [ __ ] little [ __ ] Oh, his [ __ ] corpse pushed me off. That's so unlucky. Holy [ __ ] boobs, dude. Jesus Christ. I didn't even notice that until right now. What is that [ __ ] Oh my goodness, Miyazaki. Here, I'm going to blast up and we're going to drop down right here.
27:13 Okay, I mean that works too, I guess. You know, fair enough. Also, I'm respawning now with 10 Estus. I'm not going to complain, but I don't know why. No, dude. I just walk off because I'm a dumbass and I suck at platforming. That's not okay.
27:37 Oh man, this is just getting embarrassing at this point. I I have died to gravity more times than anything else in this game, and it's not it's not even particularly close. Oh, that's the lever for the thing. [laughter] What the [ __ ] You guys saw that [ __ ] As long as I can. Look at all the blood
28:00 stains. [laughter] All the [ __ ] blood stains here are hilarious. Is this guy bumrushing the stairs, dude? No. It's a mimic. No. No. Oh, first mimic of the whole game. Need
28:18 bonfire. Oh, dude. Cuz there's a bonfire right there in Dark Souls 3II. Do you guys get the joke? Do you guys get that one? That's a good message. I like that. That's a funny message. Wow, there's a bonfire right here. Didn't even notice. And Solair. Oh my god, these spear guys are the
28:42 [ __ ] literal spawn of Satan himself. It's fine. >> [music] >> I'm going to respawn, walk in this room, and no hit you. Ew, look at him aura farming. Look at that aura walk he just did away from the camera. >> You really are fond of chatting with me,
28:56 aren't you? >> Yes, I am. >> I didn't know better. I think you have feelings for me. >> Well, maybe I do. Solar, >> pretend you didn't hear that. >> You ever think about that, huh? Okay. And now my character is
29:15 softlocked. What did we learn from this? What what what uh you know what level design mechanic did we learn from this? If I didn't have a home word bone, I literally would be trapped here. I would have to cheat my way out. Why is this a place that is so easily accessible in
29:32 the game, forced to use a home homeward bone and lose all my progress from where I was? It's fine. It's fine. I'm not going to freak out about it. It's okay. It was my own decision to to drop there, you know. was my own. It was my own by my own accord. I'm going to use this bonfire
29:49 because this one up here actually gives me uh 10 Estus as well. It's a little bit longer of a run back than the uh other bonfire that I found below, but I think it'll be better because I'll have 10 Estus instead of five. I don't know why that is, by the way. I don't
30:08 know why that bonfire has been giving me 10 Estus, but you know, why would I complain about it? Time for Orceno. I think that's who this boss is. I've been saying it. I'm pretty sure they're the ones in an Orlando, so this ought to be fun. Oh my god. God noble. God skin [ __ ] Noble. God,
30:32 dude. The endurance is really an issue. I think we need to kill the skinny guy for Oh my goodness. I wish I could even see that he was winding up for an attack. Give me a second to breathe, man. Please. Oh my god. When When do I get a chance
30:54 to heal? When do I get a chance to do anything? Dude, I don't care what anybody says. Prom [music] software is [ __ ] awful at making duo fights. Yep, there's the frame trap I'm talking about. If I didn't dodge that, I would have died to the [ __ ] skinny guys
31:16 attack. Brother, this boss is terrible. Like I'm dead. Oh my god. I had just enough time. What? I I like Why would he do a [ __ ] space closing move when I am standing directly
31:49 in front of him? I will never understand the glaze for this fight, man. The fact that he can do a gap closer that close to me. What kind of [ __ ] [ __ ] is that? Thank god he's [ __ ] dead. Oh, I didn't get a chance to flask. Oh, I skipped the cut scene on accident. Did
32:10 not mean to do that. Sorry. I'm actually shitty that I skipped it. It's okay. There's only one guy, so I actually don't hate this boss anymore. I hate that [ __ ] move, man. I need to stay close to him so he doesn't do that [ __ ] I mean, if you just want to keep doing this move, you know, I Okay, I'm
32:59 I'm getting a little bit crazy. Uh-oh. Oh, thank God. WHAT? YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN? HOW'S HE GOING TO START TO MOVE RIGHT THERE? I AM literally inches from your face and he keeps doing this stupid [ __ ] gap closer.
33:24 What happened to all your normal moves, man? Oh, there it is. Wow. No. How does that hit me? How does that hit me? Oh no, dude. Oh, that's so [ __ ] tragic. How no more Estus already on phase one. This
34:21 is so boring. Okay, dude. It's one thing for them to be dick riding each other, but like you can't even consistently punish him. phase two. How does that hit me? God, that move is [ __ ] terrifying. Heat.
35:42 Heat. Oh, we did it. [ __ ] finally. Oh my god, it's finally done. Oh, it's finally [ __ ] done. Oh. Oh my god. Oh, it feels so good. But it feels so [ __ ] good to finally be done. [snorts] Oh, my opinion still stands. Awful
36:25 [ __ ] boss. I hated that. I hated that boss. Look at my Estus, bro. I I I used all my Estus in phase one. Phase one. All my Estus was already gone. Such an unlikely run to win on, but we [ __ ] finally did it, dude. Oh, it feels so good to be done with this fight. Show me the money.
36:47 Oh, what the [ __ ] Whoa. Yeah, chest ahead. >> Yeah, I'll definitely kneel. >> Chosen undead. >> Yeah, I'm definitely kneeling before this. Oh, you're my queen. You're my queen of sunlight. All right. I see two big suns right there. Oh, I can warp
37:04 now. Oh my god, that's [ __ ] massive. I didn't think that was going to be a thing. I can warp now. Oh my god, that's so huge. What? Gamechanging. genuinely game-changing stuff. >> Hereafter I shall serveth as thine guardian she's going to guard me devote all to
37:27 thine >> oh my god she's a protector >> one with the sunlight forever more. >> Yes, mommy. Good lord, dude. [laughter] Jesus Christ. God bless Miyazaki. God [ __ ] bless. Now that I had the Lord Vessel, I want to talk to that snake guy because
37:48 I'm pretty sure he had something [music] to say about the Lord Vessel. Oh, what? He's taking me somewhere. Don't eat me. Please don't eat me. That's exactly what he's going to do. I'm a little bit scared of placing the Lord Vessel, but I don't really have another choice. I I hope this isn't the
38:05 final boss. It might be. It just might be. I don't know. Jesus Christ. That's a big [ __ ] bull. [laughter] Good lord. That's [ __ ] How was I carrying that in my pocket? [laughter]
38:23 Like, what the [ __ ] is this going to make me not a raisin? That'd be really nice. Oh, we activated the beacon. We finally killed the wither and we got the beacon active. Oh, it opened up that air. Where was
38:40 that? Where was that? Okay, that one was in an Orlando. I don't know where the other one was. I hadn't even found that yet. What are the I have not even seen half of these. What? Okay. Okay. So, we got four more bosses in order to open this door. I'm guessing we're going to go
38:58 kill the guy that murdered the firekeeper so that I can have that bonfire lit. I need to just get that out of the way. I had to look up why the firekeeper was dead in the first place. Apparently, one of the NPCs murdered her. Uh, I just am wasn't paying attention to the dialogue that he was
39:15 saying and I have to kill him so that I can get some item to revive the firekeeper. And then and then and then I'll be able to light the bonfire at Firelink. Yes, you feel the black eye orb quivering. That's what we need to use. We need to use that item in order to kill the guy who killed my lady.
39:31 Don't tell me there's three people I have to kill. Oh god. Lick the guilty. >> [music] >> He's dead. He's dead. Tell me I don't have to kill these [ __ ] too. Oh, thank God. Now, with that, I should be able to go and revive the Firekeeper. Oh, I just got a good ass ring. Wait,
39:58 what? Breaks when removed. [ __ ] Before we go to New Londo, before we go down there, we're going to go fight Cyph so that we can get a ring so I can actually access that area. So, we need to buy this from him. And then we need to go to Dark Route Garden and we should be able to open that door. I did look that up.
40:26 I'm not going to lie to you. I did look up like where I should go after Ornstein and SMO. And apparently the boss that's in New Londo, you can't even really fight without a specific ring that you get from [music] killing the wolf here. So, we're going to have to come and kill this guy, unfortunately.
40:47 [laughter] Oh, he's just a pup. I don't know how that didn't hit me, but I'm not going to complain. Let me heal underneath you. Appreciate it, big dog. First try. Great greywolf. He's just a cute little puppy, you know. I honestly
41:17 feel bad, but I had to kill him because I needed to get that ring in order to access the boss. I think I've been here already because there's like a path I took from Blight Town. We're going to go do this area next. New Londo Ruins. What does this message say? Death ahead. That's a bit scary.
41:40 I'm a big old man, though. I'll be all right. Oh, what the [ __ ] Maybe not. Maybe not. Please. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. What the [ __ ] I can't do anything about these guys. Okay, just don't go in that room. Yo, I want I want to go down here. That's just going to kill me, isn't it?
41:58 Oh my god. So [ __ ] unfortunate. It's unfortunate that I'm an idiot. That's what's unfortunate. Also, I whenever I invaded that guy, I was human and I don't I still don't know how to become a human like fully. Oh my god, there's so many blood stains. Run. Just run. I don't even know where I'm
42:17 going. [ __ ] I I could have I might have [ __ ] up big time. Oh, I [ __ ] up so big time. I'm dead. [ __ ] There's so many. [laughter] Just screamed like a little girl. Dude, the ghosts are actually terrifying. Holy [ __ ]
42:38 Oh, there's so many of them. Oh my god. Oh my god. There's so many of them. Big jump. What? What? What is this going to do? Oh, okay. That's what I'm doing. I get it now. I see. I understand. Just like the
42:58 DLC. Jesus Christ, that's a lot of [ __ ] water. Can I just say that? Moment of truth. Will I survive? Yes. I'm a [ __ ] genius. Oh, I'm so intelligent. It's crazy. The four kings. It's okay. Well, my damage is not great. Oh, there's the second one.
43:27 That's big damage, actually. Whoa. Hold on. How did that not hit him? I mean, we almost killed one of them. I don't know how that didn't hit him. That should have killed him. He He was one shot. Oh, this is going to be really annoying to do, man. Okay, you know what? I'm not
43:55 [ __ ] this. I'm going to fat roll. If you guys are going to be dumb as [ __ ] and just be annoying, I'm just going to [ __ ] max my defense and just fat roll. Okay, that's the second one down. Only two more Estus though. Okay,
44:49 one more. Okay, that's fine. We should be able to live it. Yeah, we're good. We can totally do this. [music] Just does it instantly again. Are you [ __ ] me? Are you How unlucky is that? That is pure luck right there.
45:18 He's so weak. Oh, he's dead. Thank god. Don't tell me there's a phase, too. I'm going to be really upset if there's a face, too. Oh, massive. Okay, HL's armor for the win. Very unskilled thing to do, but it had to happen. All right, it just had to happen. Aha. I [ __ ] knew it. I knew I
45:46 was missing something. God damn. I can't see [ __ ] It's dark as [ __ ] in here. Whoa. I just got [ __ ] buried. I only have one Sis. I don't I feel like I made a mistake. I have a home word bone if I need it. Oh god, is this going to be a boss? Please don't be a boss. Oh no, dude. I
46:08 have so many souls. [ __ ] >> Be gone with you. >> You spoil my focus. >> Oh wait, is it not a boss? I was scared that was going to be a boss, dude. Is this a boss? Oh god, this might be a boss. Andrew, I kind of like the way this boss
46:30 [music] looks. He's kind of cool looking. Pin wheel. Okay, I might be a little bit overleveled for this boss. Just a hair. Just a little bit overleveled for this fight. Okay, clearly this is an area I was
46:49 supposed to be Oh, wait. What? What did that say? I was too busy yapping. Oh, I can like kindle the bonfires so that I get more more Estus. Okay, well that's actually super useful. What the hell? Uh, like I said, clearly I'm a little bit overleveled for this area, but you know what? It made
47:11 going through it a hell of a lot easier, so who am I to complain, you know? Tomb of the Giants. Holy [ __ ] Oh, this is actually terrifying because I literally cannot see where he's at. Okay, that's just mean. Oh my god. Is that a bonfire? I knew it. I knew it. Cannot kindle while hollowed.
47:40 I finally know how to use a [ __ ] humanity. Oh my god. For the first time in the whole game, I'm human. Literally for the first time in the whole game, he wasn't wrong about needing rolling. Oh, dude.
47:58 This game and the gravity, dude. This thing is unreal, man. Where is the ledge? I don't know. I I can't tell where the ledge is. How is Dude, this sucks. This [ __ ] blows. This is worse than Sen's Fortress, which was worse than Blight
48:20 Town. I mean, Blight Town doesn't come close to this [ __ ] man. I don't know. I I can't tell where I'm going, man. WHO IS LEAVING A MESSAGE THERE? YOU [ __ ] [ __ ] dickweed. Leaving the message there like that is insane. What do I do? There has to be some light source or something, dude. There's no
48:41 [ __ ] way, dude. I'm going to [ __ ] lose my mind. WHAT IS THIS AREA? I I I literally can't tell where I'm walking. This is so stupid. Dude, I'm going to [ __ ] freak out. I'm not doing this on purpose. I swear to God.
49:04 Okay, man. Like, are we serious? This has to be the worst area in the game. I don't know how so many people just talk so much [ __ ] about Blight Town when this is the real [ __ ] travesty of an area. Oh my god, finally daylight. Oh, thank [ __ ] god. We're out of that hell.
49:28 Oh, this guy looks sick. What? Grave Lord Neato. This guy looks cool as [ __ ] I don't like how dark it is. Oh, he has ads. God damn it. Okay, there seems to be a lot more skeletons than I was expecting. Uh, hold on a second. You guys need to give me a
49:59 break here. I can't [ __ ] move, dude. What are What is it with From Software and having a boss just have as many enemies as possible, dude? You know what? I'm about to just put on the [ __ ] HL's armor again, and we're just going to defense that [ __ ] cuz we're going to get hit no
50:22 matter what, dude. Oh, that's so nasty. Oh my god, I'm losing my mind, bro. And people call Blight Town bad. Blight Town was actually enjoyable to explore. This [ __ ] is miserable. Actually miserable, dude. I can just stand underneath most of his attacks as well. Like he's not really
50:55 hitting me. Okay, we got him. Second try. H's armor is the [ __ ] best. And again, very cheese to just put on the armor and tank all of his attacks, but I I hate dealing with ads. Ads have to be the worst [ __ ] in the [ __ ] world. So, I don't necessarily feel bad about doing that.
51:18 That's the That's the second like soul though that we need. We got the We got the four kings. We just have two more to go. Two more souls and then we'll fight the final boss. I do want to do like DLC [ __ ] first. If you fight the final boss before you do DLC, it the game like automatically puts you into new game
51:38 plus after you beat the final boss. So, I do want to make sure that I go do like the DLC and all that before uh beating the game. We're going to go back to Qua Lag and we're going to go do that area next. The demon ruins. Okay. Surely not a boss. It might be a boss because the fog
52:00 wall stayed up. How is this a boss? There's no way, right? Whoa. Okay, maybe it is a boss. Hold on. That's a big [ __ ] boy, dude. Oh, this guy's ugly. What do we have over here? Oh [ __ ] Ceaseless discharge.
52:25 What do I attack? Whoa. Okay. Interesting hitbox on that. Oh, look at me. I actually look sick. What? Probably worse defenses, but now I don't have shoes on. So, it's always a positive in a From Software game to not have shoes on. I think I might rock this
52:55 drip the rest of the game, not going to lie. No shoes. Like, this is just how this is Miyazaki's vision. This is how the game is meant to be played. Okay, it is dodgeable. Not what I meant to do. Goodbye. Ceaseless discharge. See you later, buddy. That was actually
53:47 like surprisingly simple. I don't know why the first try was so terrible. Oh [ __ ] it like cooled the lava off. Okay. Oh, there's [ __ ] a million capper demons. What the [ __ ] Why are there so many capper demons? Okay, dude. Y'all have to chill. There is a secret hidden item. H I'm a
54:13 big brain. Okay, never mind. Dark spirit knight Kirk has invaded. [music] Stay down, [ __ ] Oh, that guy had a [ __ ] ton of souls. Holy [ __ ] All right. Well, I guess since I'm human, I can actually get
54:32 invaded now. [ __ ] Kirk wasn't expecting that [ __ ] Little [ __ ] I just stole his souls. I mean, I might as well go back to the bonfire now. Okay, I'm assuming this is a boss fight. It definitely is. Demon fire sage. Wow, that was big damage. Holy. Let's actually heal up here so we get a
54:54 chance, you know, a fighting chance. Okay, my timing right now is abysmal. My timing is could not be worse. Okay, dude. My timing on this boss could not be worse. It feels so slow. He's going to hit me. Oh my god. Even after that [ __ ] man. Come on. Like,
55:25 >> OH MY GOD. THIS IS DUDE, I cannot dodge that attack. It's so unintuitive. You have to dodge like so much later than you think you do. Okay, second try. Thank god I had to use all 10 Estus, but it's fine. Oh, there's a summon sign. Solair. Oh, I kind of want to summon Solair. I
56:08 mean, I don't want to use a summon, but it's Solair, you know. I I'm torn. We'll see what the boss is first. We're going [music] to summon Solair if I absolutely have to. Oh [ __ ] Is this Centipede demon? Actually flawlessing this guy right now. Okay, that was a little scary.
56:48 Okay, first try. Centipede demon. I don't think this was one of the guys I needed. The orange charred ring. Please tell me that that's going to let me uh traverse in lava. That's my guess, right? Surely. Yes. Okay. Reduces lava damage. I'm going to need that. Is there like an
57:07 enemy or something that's aggroed? Why can't I use the bonfire? Oh, cuz Stink Knight invaded me. What an [ __ ] There he is. Stink Knight. Oh, he spawned and died. [laughter] Okay, he just spawned in and immediately died.
57:27 Oh, that's [ __ ] hilarious. Poor guy didn't have the orange charter ring and just died immediately when he spawned. That's actually hilarious. Oh, that's where the guy spawned. Look, there's his [ __ ] souls. I got a humanity from that [ __ ] Oo, secret bonfire.
57:51 God, the messages are just unbelievably clutch. I just want to say that the fire is like blowing my [ __ ] eardrums out, dude. I can't I like it's so loud. I need to get on solid ground right now. Whoa, look at that guy. What the [ __ ] Oh, this thing is gross looking. What the [ __ ] Ew, dude.
58:18 Oh, it makes cool ass noises, though. That looks like a Subnotica creature, dude. Man, those things are cool, dude. I like them. They're [ __ ] creepy as all hell, but they're pretty cool. You can't lie. Imminent tears. Try sorrow. Uhoh. Well, this is the boss cuz I can't go
58:39 back through the thing. So, down we go, I guess. Ah, [ __ ] How do I fight this guy? That's awful hit boxes already. Okay. All right. Well, it's safe to say my souls are probably gone. Okay. I'm a little bit confused. as to
59:05 what it is I'm supposed to be doing. Oh, wait. I see. There's [ __ ] like orbs over here. I mean, he that's just his range is unreal. I see now though. I see the orbs that are glowing on his side. He's got two balls. I imagine I need to go do
59:28 something with Nice. Already hitting phase two. He's getting pissed. What? What the [ __ ] I didn't even see that [ __ ] Okay, so he can just break holes in the [ __ ] ground. That's good to
59:57 know. Oh [ __ ] he spawns like this now. Dude, come on, man. What the [ __ ] is this boss? Oh my god. Well, how what do you do? I don't understand this boss at all. You're going to get hit no matter what. I'm I don't know how to dodge his attacks, dude. [music]
01:00:24 Yeah. Okay. The poisoning does nothing. OH MY GOD. WHAT IS THIS BOSS, DUDE? This is terrible. This is [ __ ] like awful. What in the [ __ ] Like, hello. Don't fall, please. Oh my god. Did y'all see that [ __ ] Did you guys [ __ ] see that [ __ ] Wretch. This is in fact a
01:00:57 wretch. Yeah, [ __ ] you. [ __ ] little gimmick ass fight. Bed of chaos done, baby. It's just an Orlando. And then we do DLC and then we're done with the game. That's it. We're truly in the end game now. This is truly the end game. Before we go to an
01:01:17 Orlando uh and see that new fog wall area that unlocked, we're going to go to the dark root basin so that we can get items we're going to need for the DLC. Oh my god, my beloved grass crush shield. And there should be a sneaky hidden little guy back here that we have
01:01:42 to kill in order to access DLC. There he is. Yeah. So, we got to kill this guy to get to DLC. He's weak as hell. Okay. Nice. [music] Yes. And then we get an NPC. Okay. She disappears. Now we can go to an Orlando. And then we go through that area. And there's another specific enemy
01:02:07 we have to kill in order to get an item. And then we have to come back here and go through like a portal to access DLC. very convoluted in my opinion. You know, not the most uh intuitive thing in the world, but you know, it's fine. Uh we're not going to do the DLC before we kill the boss there, but we're
01:02:28 going to do the DLC right after we kill it. So, I figured I might as well go [music] grab that [ __ ] before I even come in here. And he should drop a broken pendant. Yes. Okay, that unlocks the DLC. We should be able [music] to go back to that now. This isn't the boss, right?
01:02:49 Oh my god, it is. Oh my god, he's [ __ ] beautiful looking. I don't understand how you don't get hit by that there. What? Hello. What? [music] Where do I go? I don't The [ __ ] Where the [ __ ] am I at? It's locked.
01:03:12 Where do you go? What? I don't understand. How do you escape this? Oh, okay. That makes a lot more sense. Finally, this is it. Okay. What? Okay. Never would have realized that this was a thing if that guy never hit me. >> [music]
01:03:42 >> Just want to let that be known. H Yeah, that is grief indeed. Okay, dude. No, that's [ __ ] ridiculous. That is unreal. Oh [ __ ] See the scalless. This [ __ ] oneshotted me. >> What? How did this [ __ ] get in the boss room?
01:04:11 Oh my god, this boss [ __ ] sucks. I can't see anything. I can't [ __ ] see. I mean, it'd be cool if I could even [ __ ] see the thing instead of looking at his goddamn tail. Let me hit your tail. Oh my god, this boss sucks. Yep, I finally figured it out. I just need to
01:04:32 stop trying to go for his [ __ ] tail, dude. The boss isn't actually bad. I've just been fighting him wrong the whole time. No, no, no, no. Please, man. How do you get the tail weapon? [ __ ] seems really hard to get. No, please. He's one shot.
01:05:13 Goodbye, Seed the Scalus. Yeah, the boss was not nearly as bad as I thought. I was just fighting him the wrong way cuz I'm a dumbass. Okay, we got the four souls required for the Lord Vessel. So, we can do the final boss, but we're going to do DLC first because apparently once you beat the final boss,
01:05:33 it puts you into new game plus automatically and you'll have to go through the whole game again. And we're not doing that. So, we're just going to do DLC now. The Sanctuary Garden. Immediate boss fight. Surely not, right? Oh my god, it is a boss fight. What the hell? Was not expecting this.
01:05:56 Jesus Christ. Give me a second, man. [ __ ] No [ __ ] way, dude. Oh my [ __ ] god. This guy just dodges everything, dude. Please. No. Of course you're still alive. And I have no stamina. Oh my god. Yo, sit the [ __ ] down. Sit the absolute
01:06:27 [ __ ] down, [ __ ] Wow. Fast ass boss. Holy sanctuary. Probably butchered the [ __ ] out of that, but it's fine. Let me get this [ __ ] out of here. Ow, that hurt. Okay, that hurt a lot more.
01:06:50 Okay, never mind. Man, Miyazaki loves putting his dragons [music] on bridges, I gotta say. What? Okay, that's mean as [ __ ] dude. Really? What is this even going to be, man? Oh [ __ ] It's It's This is Artorius. What? Wait, what? There's no [ __ ]
01:07:13 way. I thought Artorius was the last boss of the DLC. I can't believe I'm fighting [ __ ] Artorius right now. Ow, that hurts. Okay. Okay. What the [ __ ] is that promised consort [ __ ] Never in a million years was I expecting that boss
01:07:35 to be artorious. Genuinely. Come on, man. Come on. I don't even get the chance. Jesus Christ, dude. Oh, the dodging is so annoying, man. The dodging is so annoying. Nice. Nice. Good dodge there.
01:08:43 That doesn't hit him is so unlucky. I'm going to get hit. I'm not going to get hit. That hits me though. God, dude. He's [ __ ] relentless. He is [ __ ] relentless. He's so aggressive. As soon as I heal. Really? As soon as I heal. You can't
01:09:04 make that [ __ ] up. The millisecond I press X to heal, he [ __ ] doesn't attack. Oh man. Okay. What's he going to do now? That move [music] catches me off guard so much. It looks so much like his other swing.
01:09:44 That doesn't hit. Unlucky. Damn it. All right, that's PB. Good looks, baby. forgot he can follow up on it. No, dude. I was I was in an animation for rolling and I still got hit. Where are my eye frames? Did you not Did you guys see that? I was literally at the [music]
01:10:56 start of an animation for a roll and I still got hit. Got him on his way out. That's nice. That works as well. Please, no stamina. Actually insane right now. This is so tense.
01:12:08 Goodbye, Artorius. Yes. Oh, yes. Awesome boss. Awesome [ __ ] boss. Easily the best boss so far. Easily the best boss. Guy was cool as hell, dude. Oh, I'm so surprised it was that early on. Well, I thought there were stairs. All right. Oh, I'm all the way back here. Yeah, that was a really fun boss. That
01:12:34 was a good boss. Easily the best so far. But he's difficult in a good way. Like his difficulty stems from the fact that he actually has like cool moves and he's not just a massive blob on my screen that I can't [ __ ] see. All right. Well, I thought Artorius was like the last boss of the DLC. I guess not cuz
01:12:54 there's still way more there's still like whole other area here that I have to explore. Look at these like Pokemon dudes. They look like Prime Apes. Chill, chill, chill. Okay. I try I tried to side sneak by him. It's not going to happen.
01:13:15 What? Okay, dude. Gravity is getting to become an issue. Try a plunging attack. Wait, this might be an abyss thing. I might need to put the ring back on. or not. Maybe it's not an Abyss thing. Okay. Well, it was worth a try. It was
01:13:43 worth a try. [ __ ] [ __ ] messages got me [ __ ] up, dude. They pranked me twice. They pranked me not once, but twice. Despair ahead. What is this boss? Oh my god. Is it Madar? Kind of. Not really. He's not. I thought it was a dragon. Manis, father of the abyss. Whoa. Okay. Okay.
01:14:06 Chill on me, dude. [music] What the [ __ ] is that [ __ ] What in the world is that [ __ ] Come on. Like, when do you heal, brother? He's just nonstop attacking. What is that [ __ ] They're getting hit mid Oh,
01:15:04 heat, heat. Brother, are we serious? Oh my god. And I'm dead. Goodbye. He dodges. I press dodge and nothing happens. But he [music] dodges perfectly every time.
01:16:14 Dude, I hate this [ __ ] enemy. Please, dude. It's so inconsistent. I'm going to die. Who's shocked? Who is shocked? Nobody. Nice hit box. Mid roll. The classic [music] >> [music] >> Oh my god. God,
01:17:41 [music] there's the mid roll hit again. Again. Mid roll hits. Ridiculous. [music] [music] Thank god, dude. Way too fast for the game's mechanics. Way too fast, bro. I mean, that's DLC done, though.
01:18:16 That's the whole DLC, I think. I think that's the last uh area. I guess we go back to Firelink and just finish this [ __ ] man. Back where it all started. God, I I know I was being like a really annoying baby, but that [ __ ] [music] was infuriatingly an like Oh, so pissed off from that [ __ ] dude. So pissed off. We
01:18:40 got all the souls to offer. This is it. This is the final boss of the whole game. Woo! I'm excited. Okay, luckily he's his aim is dog [ __ ] Looking like Nathan Peterman with that accuracy. That [ __ ] was horrendous. I think it's pretty wild that all of this is just underneath Firelink.
01:19:00 Okay, you know, you had to get one at least one more death to gravity in there. I [music] promise I'm not doing that [ __ ] on purpose. It's just so I'm just an idiot. Okay, I'm just a [ __ ] idiot. Here we go. Final boss. Gwyn, Lord of Cinder. Oh my god. You wouldn't in any way be
01:19:20 related to Gwyavir, would you? Whoa. Okay. Okay. Chill. Chill. Chill. Chill. Dude, you just did a [ __ ] forward thing attack. You're telling me I can't heal after that, dude. Okay, so for real this time. That's so fast. Unreactively fast.
01:20:16 When do you heal, man? You know what? I'm going to [ __ ] parry. I'm going to try to parry this boss because I just think, you know, fighting it the real way is just not it, man. His attacks are just super quick and I don't really get a chance to heal anyways. So, if I can parry most of his attacks, [music]
01:20:37 that's going to be big. We're going to try it and see if we can even do it properly. But, you know, let's be honest, I'm probably going to [ __ ] it up. I'm ass at parrying in these games. I always have been. And that's not going to change now. Certainly, especially when I haven't been using a shield for
01:20:52 the entire game. Finally got one off. >> [music] >> Got another one, baby. Absolutely cooking on your head. [music] Okay. Well, I can't parry a grab attack. That's on me for being a dummy.
01:21:33 Okay, we got two parries off. You know, that's not awful, I guess. Hell yeah. Good time. Good time to tack there. Oh, beautiful. We're looking good right now. Nice. Oh yeah, pairing is just so much more
01:22:13 intuitive for this fight. Okay, not when he does a quick ass move like that. That's [ __ ] unfortunate. That's a very fast move. I don't think I've reacted to that once without panic rolling. Dude, my room is like moody as [ __ ] right now. I got a candle going. The lights are out. Oh my god, this is
01:22:39 like a peak gaming experience that I'm having right now. Genuinely like lifealtering. I don't know. It could also be the edible I took, but that was so unbelievably lucky. That was also unbelievably lucky. Okay, thank God we actually got one parry [music] timed properly.
01:23:14 Okay, I I'm I'm parrying a little bit too late on the wide swing. It's okay. We're We're fine. We're fine. Oh, we're so fine. Just stay locked in, baby. Stay locked in. Oh, just stay locked in, baby. We're cooking. We're cooking. [music] Oh my god, that was beautiful. We're
01:23:43 cooking. Oh, we're [ __ ] Oh, it's done. That's the game. Sit the [ __ ] down, [ __ ] You sit the [ __ ] down. Oh, good ass boss. That That might be the best boss in the game. I think that was so fun. Oh, and that's the [ __ ] game, dude. Oh, beautiful.
01:24:08 Beautiful final boss. That was so good. That was so fun. Actually, like parrying. That was I if I ever play this game again, which I probably will, I'm definitely going to do like a parry build cuz that was [ __ ] fun, dude. That was so satisfying right at the end, bro. Oh, I know he kept doing the same
01:24:25 move, but so [ __ ] satisfying. What a good boss. That's it. That's the game. Oh, awesome. Awesome [ __ ] game. Holy [ __ ] man. I can't believe it's over, man. I can't believe it's over. What a journey. What a [ __ ] journey. Good ass game, man.
01:24:48 I'm so glad that I played this.