Berner Phone - Berner Phone #94: Lockdown Positivity

Episode Date: June 9, 2025

The pandemic had a lot of lows, but today we're looking on the bright side. The dialers are telling stories about the positives that came out of lockdown and we share our own story. Get tickets to Hannah's new tour Get tickets to see Des live

Hi, it's Hannah Burner and Des Bishop. Thanks for calling the burner phone. If you leave a message after the tone, we may have to make it into a podcast. Hi, my little dialers. It's mom and dad. And we're so excited to be back with another episode. A burner phone. Listen, guys, you know, I shouldn't let the, I shouldn't let the, I should.

shouldn't pull the curtain back, but Hannah's in a weird starting mood this morning. She made me restart twice. Because I will, the beginning is very important to me and I wanted the energy to be perfect. So you just wanted that pause there for no reason also? No, that was my mistake. But we can't start over now. We're not starting again. I'm given three startovers and I've already taken my three.

But no, I'm excited because the topic today was after must, Much chungri. What's chungri? I don't know. I thought you were going to say deliberation. Did you just make up a word? What the hell is chungri? What's the word?

I have no idea. Much chungrum. I have no. I don't know the word. I'd love to learn it. No, but I honestly, I don't know. But I'm sure there is a word, but I honestly, I don't know. Much chagrin.

Much is it? How do you spell that? Wait, do you not? No, it's not a word I'm super familiar with what, but, but, but I'm, chagrin, I think. No, I'm just, I, I love it, I love a good word. I'm laughing because I feel like people listening, no, either are like, please stop or they're like, I know, uh, ch, it's like, C-H-A-G? Much chagrin. So it's listed as a, uh, distress or embarrassment or having failed or being humiliated. You sure that's the word you're thinking of? It doesn't matter. It possibly is. It doesn't. It doesn't. It doesn't

matter. I got accused of mansplaining on the Spotify comments. I'm not going to mansplain a word that I still don't know what it is. Wait, I love how the Spotify comments are involved in our relationship. What did you mansplain? I have, listen, mansplaining, as you know, it's a thing. Are you mansplaining what mansplaining is right now? There you go, mansplaining. As I like to explain, mansplaining is just explaining by a man that got gendered somehow. But anyway, we don't have time to get into it. No. Like the man flu. No. I did one of my first hand in the streets. I was asking guys to explain what mansplaining is without mansplaining it. That was the question. That's a good one, actually. Did you put that up again? It was like three years ago.

You should do that again, though. That's a good one. I know it is a good one. I mean, it's a catch 22, as they say. Got them. It's very, what's the one that you like? It's very Z-way. Got you. That one. Yes. You can't win. Can't win. Yeah. Lose, lose, as they say, in the biz. Anyway, we never got to the bottom of what the word was. Much chagrin.

Next week's prompt, what the fuck was Hannah trying to say? Actually, I know what next week's prompt's going to be. It's like, what word are saying, have you been saying wrong? Like, your whole life or, like, didn't know was wrong. Oh, right, yeah. that's a good one much chagrin is like a saying I think after much stress was what I was thinking but it clearly doesn't mean that

but anyway after much chagrin we um honestly you guys the dialers are the reason why this prompt came back because we said it last week that we had thought about positive like surprisingly positive things that came out of the pandemic the lockdown but we said we were worried that it was insensitive

because obviously we're aware that there's a lot of tragedy The pandemic was the world locked down because people were dying, and we get that, obviously. But the overwhelming comments on the Spotify comments were that we think it's a good topic and not insensitive. So that's the topic for this week. And it was inspired by the fact that I guess I was probably thinking about it because it was our three-year wedding anniversary last month. And I was just, I think I was talking to somebody. about the fact that, yeah, like, it's all because of the pandemic. Yep.

I think somebody was asking me, like, about living here, or, you know, not living in Ireland as much anymore. And I was thinking, well, yeah, it's all just the pandemic because I had no plans to move back here. I mean, I had been spending more time here, but I had no plans of moving away from my Irish journey. And then I happened to notice that you were following me and was only because of lockdown that we were sitting there

and then we met up and our lives both took an unbelievable turn. Isn't that crazy? One date? One date? Well, I mean, it was a pandemic. There was many factors beyond just us meeting, but most of them were related to the pandemic. Well, the fun stuff is, yeah, there's so many, for us to be here right now, there were so many little things that had to happen.

This is life. I mean, if I didn't get into comedy, there's no way you would have known who I was. Yeah, me too. I mean, God, like, you could, how many moments in your life could you go back and look at the events that needed to happen? Yeah. Like, for me to get into comedy, you can never say, but for me to get into comedy, I would have to destroy my life with alcohol and drugs, join a 12-step fellowship, meet a comedian at that 12-step fellowship, who would then start bringing us to a comedy club, and then eventually push me into trying stand-up. but to say that I definitely wouldn't have gotten into stand-up

you can't say because I unrelated to that while I was still drinking I'd already joined the Drama Society in Cork in college and you know so possibly I would have but that's the whole thing is like you can never say or would you argue that regardless of what we did in this lifetime we would have found each other that it was our destiny it was our destiny

UN Fen as the Chinese like to say yeah like you would have been a firefighter and I would be working in as a teacher in St. John's and we saw each other. My mother would have set us up because she was working there. It's funny that you picked like John's.

My mother was doing the payroll admin in St. John's. And she goes, I have a much older man for you. You got to meet my son. I mean, he's a little crazy, but. We were talking about how like we are both New Yorkers and granted you went to Ireland, but there must have been times where we were in similar areas in Manhattan or kind of thing

because it is still a small island. Yeah, criss cross, yeah. Chris cross. I can't get, there's a great Chinese movie called Tian Mimi, which uses the music of Teresa Tong, which I've played to you in the car, or Dong Li Jun for the Mandarin speakers.

And it's a movie about destiny, UN Fan. But the thing is that people always think, like, it's our destiny to be together. But actually, you know, destiny, not realizing your destiny can be, quite painful and this movie is really about because the chinese are really into uan fan they're into destiny they're into this sense of like something being destined and uh but actually

that can can be kind of tragic too well yeah because it's it builds expectations yeah anyway but not to get too deep but there's an idea of yes destiny but is there something even more romantic about being with someone that you aren't necessarily destined to be with one person and two people just chose each other to make it work. I think I should point out that I don't believe in destiny. I believe that everything is quite, is random, actually. I do too. I do too, but I believe in an overall intuitiveness of trusting your gut will get you in a good

place. Interesting. We'll get you in the right space where you're able to be. happy. Yes. But one thing I definitely believe in is that any trick that helps you get results, get through life, find inner peace, any, you know, system that work for you, go for it. You know, because I, as I once joked in a show about whether there's a heaven or not, which I don't believe in heaven, and a lot of people believe in heaven, but I always joked, the one thing we know for sure is that we don't know. So take a

pick, which everyone gives you comfort, and we'll see who was right in the end. So maybe destiny's real, maybe life is just totally random. Either way, it doesn't matter. Life's happening anyway. Roll with it, baby. That's the chagrin.

You know who said that, right? Maryland Monroe. I was going to say Marilyn Monroe, but I was trying to get a new beat. You know, all the gigglers are in a Marilyn Monroe now. I know. I've noticed. I did it on the giggly squad. We got a prompt.

I didn't put it in, but somebody said, I just have to message in that I was, they were watching something or reading something and actually did, the book starts with a quote from Marilyn Monroe and they were like dying laughing, even though it's not funny. But that's where the joke comes from where like, there are a lot of quotes by Marilyn Monroe that like are iconic. Yes.

So, but then I like like doing random, like nerdy things and being like Marilyn Monroe said that. Nice. By the way, did I just mansplain destiny? That's for the Spotify comments to decide. Did I just mansplain the randomness of life? That's for Spotify comments to decide. But also, with mansplaining, I would argue I don't want a man that doesn't know how to explain things. Yeah, I mean, listen, we're not going to.

We don't actually, we don't really delve too much into these issues. You haven't been in corporate America. It's more of like a corporate America problem, which I have. many a time dealt with where it's like a man assuming you don't know things when you're qualified or taking credit for an idea and that kind of stuff which could be annoying I'm trying I wish I could think of a word right now that like I used incorrectly for a while song lyrics yes and that's like a lot of comedians do that and that's like a thing but um and I think we did that as a prompt can we also do your favorite quote our favorite quotes

a la Marilyn Monroe for one of the episodes. Oh, actual quotes. Yeah, because I love quotes. I'm a big quote. But the problem of quotes, famous quotes, is that they're so often misquoted. Yeah.

Like, people say somebody said this, they didn't say that. Yeah. Like Michael Jordan never said Republicans by sneakers too. Yeah. He never said that. Yeah.

But that's like, does it matter that he didn't? I was on Amy Poller's podcast and I said you miss 100% of shots you don't take or whatever, which is in Gretsker or something. But then people found there actually is a Michael Jordan quote. Yeah.

It's like very similar. But it doesn't matter really a lot of time who said it. Sometimes it does. Yogi Berra. Yeah, isn't he misquoted saying that? No, Yogi Berra is just famous for saying hilarious quotes. Oh, right. Yeah.

Like, wrong. Yes. Anyway, we'll come up with the good quotes. We use Burnerphone to come up with what our other Burnerphone episodes are going to be. Yeah. Because we're nearly, we're 10 minutes into the episode. And this is a good one. This is a very good one.

But, you know, I was getting emotional reading these. I'm not going to. lie. I actually welled up a couple of times. Wow. Yeah. So let's get into it. But trust me, I didn't go over the emotional on the picks. There was a lot of relationship ones and like work changes, but I tried to, I tried to keep it, you know, I tried to keep it like. We trust you, DJ Jazzy. Sorry. Okay. Well, here's one that's kind of like us. so I fell in love with my fiance who I'm marrying in less than a month he is a touring musician and during the pandemic obviously there was no show touring happening so we got stuck at my house together and really look back fondly on that time so we could really get to know each other and fall in love before he started touring again and when he's gone it's like every weekend like leaves Wednesday, comes home on Sunday.

So it was a really, really necessary and magical time for us to just like spend so much time together, get to know each other at the beginning of our relationship. Like we started dating March 14th of the pandemic, and he basically moved in with me immediately. Yeah, and we get married next month. So it was a great side effect. I mean, it's literally us. Yeah.

Well, it's that idea that. But some people's jobs were kind of forbidding them from, like, stopping and having a relationship that they could actually, like, get close to someone. Yes. And it, like, forced you to slow down and spend quality time. I always thought what was fascinating with us, too, is that you had never seen me do stand up. And, like, I had seen you do stand up years ago at the cellar. But it's the kind of thing where comedy is so, like, oh, like, I saw you on stage. whatever, where we just, like, fell for each other off the stage.

Because it's so easy to fall for someone with their charisma on stage. Yeah, I mean, I never fell for a comic from watching them on stage. So I don't think that's the game. A man has never fall in love with a female comic. He's definitely heard her on stage and been like, did she just say, queef? No, no. But no, but, like, that is depth, like, as we literally just said,

We don't really get into like, you know, a lot of the differences between men and women discusses on this podcast. But that is just one of the odd things in this life that everyone has their theories about. But definitely female comics don't find it easier to meet men because of doing stand-up whereas male comics find it easier to women because doing stand-up. So that never entered my brain in relation to us ever once. But I also, I've never done stand-up comedy, like actually really being single. so I can't speak to that.

I feel like, I don't know, maybe I would have had fun, but it wouldn't have been the same. Yeah, I just, I don't think women feel as safe anyway for that level of randomness. But anyway, let's not get bogged down in that. No, what I will say is that we often joked, and I think we've joked on this podcast, that, you know, when you've just met somebody,

the lockdown was amazing. Because you get to spend so much time together in that honeymoon period where nothing's annoying. and we got all that. We got that first year together with the lockdown. No shows, you know, just like focus on each other. And then right around the time where you start to hear the breathing, we started spending, yeah, right around the time that the mastication amplifies,

we started working again. And it was ideal. And then we missed each other. And then, you know, you miss each other. And it's beautiful. I also, during COVID, like, cooked for you every day. I mean, not every day, but you did whatever food delivery cooking service we were using at the time. And we've used them all.

We've used them all. And that was quite nice. Honestly, we were living in the beach in West Hampton, dunes. And we were, you know, just having our quiet little life. Just me and you. No, Aiden even. Just me and you. And whatever pit bull we were taking care of at the time.

Whatever pit bull or Bahaman street dog we were fostering from Southampton Animal Shelter. And in fairness, we had a nice little crew of people out in West Hampton. We played beach volleyball till it was frozen. And we played tennis till I tore my groin from trying to keep up with your shots. And it was really ideal. The only problem for me is that I played so much sports

during that first year that I really have had nothing but problems physically seems but other than that's for another that's for another episode I also want to say that my career was interesting because some people which we probably got messages about had a career and then COVID hit and they got to realize like wait this is not what I want to do where I actually had just started getting momentum you were just getting started I had just getting started and I had just started my first thing theater tour. I had announced five theaters that I was doing. So I'd finished, I'd done like two rounds of clubs across the nation. And then I was supposed to go to San Francisco, like March 12th or

whatever it was. And it got canceled. And then I remember there's photos of me practicing in my living room for my parents because I was afraid I was going to forget my jokes of my first hour I wrote. And it was, it was cool that after COVID, I continued that work. Some people took it as a sign, like, maybe comedy isn't it for me, you know? Yeah, I mean, that was annoying. That was tough for you, though. For me, I was, like, doing comedy since 1997. Like, one of the great things for me was like, fuck, man, this enforced solitude is great for me.

I mean, I'm not going to repeat. I've talked about that before, but, like, the just not having to work, but also not feeling guilty about it, like, not touring. Oh, my God, yeah. And, like, the other thing that people forget, like, you know, it was 21 when I started doing comedy. was a pandemic, I was 44, okay? So, 23 years of on and off adrenaline, on and off cortisol, just like, you know, stress, travel. I'm not complaining, I love my job, but like my body was happy with the reset.

And it's funny because that's the only way I knew you, which was Beach Dez, which was like, we're playing volleyball, we're relaxing, we're enjoying the water, we're jumping in the ocean. But, and that is like a side of people that a lot of people like forget they have, which is I don't have to be working all the time. But that is, okay, it was horrible, but there was that lightness of like we're all in it together. Yeah. Where I used to, when I was younger, before planes had like Wi-Fi or we had smartphones, I loved going on planes because it was the one time I felt not guilty about not working. Yes.

Because I was like, I can't work. so I can actually sit there. So us all being inside and knowing no one else was like going on some world door was there was like a calmness to it. But that's gone now. Free Wi-Fi on some Delta planes.

Not all of them, but some of them. All right, let's move it on. But by the way, you know, the touring part of that relationship also, we have that. But we have both. So that's the only difference. Actually, this one sounds complicated.

Hi, Hannah. So I already knew going into the pandemic that my husband was not my forever life partner, but the shutdown put my life into perspective and forced me to take action. So we had already been married for five years before COVID, but I was able to live a fun life regardless of being unhappy in that marriage. But now I was stuck in a house 24 fucking 7 with someone I didn't want to fuck or be nice to. The resentment was building fast and locked and I finally bit the bullet and got divorced and moved out of my small town. Five years later, I have my dream job, the coolest group of friends, and I'm engaged to a sexy-ass zaddy that I love and I can't keep my hands off.

It's so funny because on the transcription, it said, I'm gay, not I'm engaged. So I have written here, gay come out after divorce. But that's not what she said. Don't mansplain how she got a divorce. No, it's just, you know, because I read the transcripts. I don't listen. Yeah. So it's totally different to what I expected.

Yeah. Also, I love trying to pinpoint the accents. I think this is Midwest. Right. Okay. Because she's hitting her vowels hard. Also, so proud of her. But it's so interesting how, like, this reminds me of a lot of people. They kind of were able to tell themselves that they're, like, too busy to break up.

I know especially New Yorkers. I have so many friends who were like, I can't break up with him this week. Like, I have this, like, big project or, like, I can't break up with him next week because, like, he's traveling. And, like, they would just have all these reasons why they're both too busy to literally have a sit down and break up. I mean, there's like the old Dane Cook joke where it's like, my CDs are in his car. I can't break up with him. Where the pandemic. God, that one dated.

That one was dated. But the pandemic, you were forced to face stuff. But I also wonder for people that this happened. to if you deal with stuff differently in your life now because of the pandemic, where you're like, oh, I'm never going to let myself go five years and not a happy marriage. Or it took her five years for that realization to be like, okay, this isn't getting better. Definitely the pandemic was bad for long-term relationship. Any relationship that was rocky, I think a lot of them, but not all of them,

but a lot of them did not survive the pandemic, you know, which is good, I guess. Well, I think it exacerbated whatever was currently happening. So, like, if it was a new love, it was, like, fun. And if it was already going downhill, it sped it up. Okay, this is a career one that's kind of, I find quite moving. When the pandemic first began, I was headed into my senior year of college. I was studying to become a teacher, and it was supposed to be my student teaching semester. So that's, like, the semester you actually get to go.

to a classroom and teach. And they were like, hey, so it's going to be virtual. And I was like, oh, God, no. So I took a leave of absence. And I ended up getting a job in a preschool that year. And I met a little girl who has Down syndrome, who became really comfortable with me. She started talking to me. She wasn't talking to anybody. She would never talk. And she really became comfortable with me, showed me her personality, and I fell absolutely in love. And now, like, four years later, this summer I'll be nannying for her family. And I never would have met her. It's not beautiful, right? She found her calling. It is crazy how, like, meeting one person can, like, really change your life. I know. It's kind of like a, almost like a

movie. Yeah. Yeah. Well, because she clearly went into teaching because she wanted to connect with children and she loved children and then it's like she found a child where she was able to feel like she had an impact with so it gave her but i would also maybe suggest that she might have a gift for making you know people who struggle to learn comfortable you know it is so funny though side note because i come from a family of teachers like how difficult it is to become a teacher and then how little they pay them. Oh, that's always been my bugbear that people love hating teachers because they're all coming

off their own shit. Yes. And that parents love ripping on teachers. Oh, they get paid too much. They get the whole summer off. And they, because they, parents like to put all their, a lot of their own like lack of helping their children blame the teachers. Yeah.

And by the way, I, parenting is hard. I'm not suggesting that parenting isn't really hard. I'm just talking about the people that try to blame the teachers. And of course, there's bad teachers. but there's not as many bad teachers as the hate that they can get. Oh, my God. It's ridiculous. Obviously, I have family that are teachers also, and it's like a tough gig.

And also, in terms of its importance in life, like, how important are teachers. It's shaping our future. Versus the amount that they get paid. No, it's. And how unimportant are lawyers. Like, do you think fucking, you know, like, personal injury lawyer.com, fucking, you know, the non-stop ads on TV. You think this is important for society?

Those people get paid multitudes of what teachers get paid. You know what I mean? No, I know. Just, you know, fucking ambulance chasers and like hedge fund guys. Like, listen, I get it. You know, hedge fund's a real thing. But like, do fucking commodification of gambling and the amount of fucking money they make. And then to turn around and be like, teachers' pensions are the problem for our economy?

No. Sorry to get all fucking communist on you. No, but let's see. see what the world looks like without teachers. No, it's, it's, I, I think teachers are, whatever about underpaid, chronically underappreciated. A thousand percent, you know? Also, the whole, they need summers off. Have you ever dealt with 20 children in a room every day?

You can be stuck with your fucking kids every day. You can never just answer an email. Even when they are, they have to do it during their lunch break. Yeah, you're going to sit there and fucking like help them to get through the multiplication times tables? Get the fuck out of here. All right, here's one for you. Hey, Hannah. Hey, Des. So something that happened to me positive during the pandemic, something I learned. I was 25, frontal lobe fully developed, living alone for the first time, just

got out of a long-term relationship with a horrible ex. And I learned how to masturbate for the first time. I had never done it before. And that's when I learned. And it helped me not go back to my toxic ex. And yeah, it's been great. So bye. Love you. I'm obsessed I love why you're like this is for you but this is right out of my alley no pun intended just because when we first met like you were doing like

you remember you were doing a lot of stuff with oh dildos balessa was it was valesa what was vibrators belessa there was a couple yeah yeah there was a lot of a lot of dildos being posted to our house yes like we would get boxes and boxes and then I'm not going to say who

but like you would give like gift packs to people in our lives. But particularly like, do you know what I found really fun about that time was there was a couple of people like over 40 that like you handed that stuff. And you probably don't realize that like generational, like the openness that, you know, you experience. Like it's kind of recent phenomenon. Like they used to not be fucking vibrators for sale at CVS. So like when you suddenly like would hand like a gift packet to somebody we know of like, like, you know, slightly, a woman that was older than you, and they'd be like, oh, my God, thank you so much.

You know, it's just like the stress of buying them for them, take it away. Well, that's the thing. My first vibrator was a friend who got it for me. Because it's like, you're not going to do it because of all the societal stuff. It's like, I'm not a little freak. I'm a little crazy sex fiend freak. Yeah, because sex shops used to, like, even when we were kids, we used to go to the Jolly Joint on Main Street.

And it was like a sneaky thing. It was like, oh, my God, we're going to a show. No, we're going to a sex shop. It's like, change. and whips and ball gags and fleshlights. And you're like, I'm, I feel deviant, especially if you grew up religious. Shout out any flushing people out there.

Remember the jolly joint. That's going back. Yeah, that was niche. But so when my friend got it for me, and it just was like, oh, it's like getting your friend a face mask. It's like, this is good for you. That's how it should be. Yes.

And I do think masturbation is, like, guys, I always was jealous of guys because. it was just part of their life, like at 11 or 12, and they'd talk to their friends about it. No, no, no, no, no, no. 13? No, we didn't talk to our friends about it. Oh, you didn't talk to your friends about it.

No, no, that's something that you did for numerous years before everybody finally was like, okay, are we admitting this? Because actually, when you're younger, you're like, oh, fuck a joke off, bro. You fucking jerk off? That's so funny. You know, you didn't realize. I don't know, maybe my generation.

I just remember the guys being like, I jerked off four times yesterday. Yeah, but I think they're probably a little old. Yeah, they're probably like 12, 13. It was definitely, well, sorry, I'll speak for my generation. I don't want to mansplain. Yeah. I don't want to mansplain male activity.

No, you're allowed to. But, but, you kept it a secret. Like, in the early days, it was a secret so you realize, like, everybody does this. But the funny thing about masturbation for boys is that they kind of discover it themselves more. Well, also, don't you have, like, wet dreams and stuff? Well, that nocturnal emissions happen if you don't choke one out. But I definitely, anyway, this is. very graphic but I started jerking off

before the nocturnal emissions happened so anyway but also I feel like girls that doesn't happen to it's just like different but yeah you don't talk to your friends about it's just like yeah the boys are drinking off and we're just like not and that's just how life is when

and then when girls realize like oh I am in control of of like my own pleasure it's a game changer yeah your pussy's not a library book man you don't have to fucking return it. Fold the pages. Make it your own. Burn them on, bro. No, because we had this nun in St. Kevin's and she was obsessed

with not folding the pages as a bookmark. Oh my God. That's so funny when teachers have like their thing. Yeah, she was obsessed. Like you do not fold the page as a bookmark. Use a bookmark, you know? And then... Well, if you don't have a bookmark. When I used to have this routine about like You know, because there used to be a thing where, like, women would never admit that they masturbated. There was, like, so much more shame around female masturbation. Yeah.

You know? And it's like, why, like, I used to be like, why, why not? Like, why wouldn't you? Oh, my feminist king. No, it's not even about feminism. It's like, what's stopping you? Well, but also, it's not as, it's not as easy. And our bodies are, like, different.

And you have to, like, learn your body. You got to, but that's the whole thing. You got to learn. And it's, yeah, it's, it's, with girls, it's a lot more. where guys, it seems less mental. It's more like a, like this has to happen or I'm going to fucking explode. Yeah, you're going to like punch a wall. Yeah, just anyway, it doesn't matter.

We won't get into the physiology of it. All right, where are we going to go here? DJ, does he? Well, this came up so much, so we might as well. Hi, Hannah. Hi, hi, Des. Love you guys. That's what everyone says. I'm drunk.

I just got home from a bar. But I wanted to tell you, something positive that came out of COVID was my parents, after 21 years of my life, I never let me get a dog. I grew up my whole childhood wanting a dog. We were not allowed to have any pets in the household. No dog, no cats. One time I had a fish, but that's about as exciting as it gets. And so during COVID, I convinced them to get a puppy, and the rest is history. We got a puppy.

She's five now. Her name's Marley. she's the best thing to ever happen to us and for some reason it took until COVID to get this dog so I don't know what what changed my parents' mind during COVID but maybe because we were home all the time

we couldn't go anywhere they were teachers so they were stuck at home too we were all stuck at home so we all got to share the responsibility but that was pretty cool so really the only cool thing but thanks bye so I had to include one like 30% of them were pets So that's pretty awesome

We were fostering though Because I was very Because obviously you know there was a problem With people getting pets And then returning them right? Yes These are obviously stories of people Where they kept the pet

Which is awesome But I was fostering Because I knew that once the comedy life Started again Like it's not ideal for a pet adoption Well yeah It was like impulsive for some people Where they were like

Yeah if the world opens up This isn't gonna work But right now it works That's like fostering's great unfortunately if you're if you're single so they were like you you live alone you're single guy no kids so that that was like licensed for them to be like okay here's all our fucking toughest dogs I was like trying to tame beasts no literally well that's the joke I said if he could tame this pit bull he could tame me well I had Flynn when I met you and he was a 90 pound 90 pound blue nose

pit best dog ever he was the gentlest great with other dogs just Like, but the problem with him was like, he was a lot. And when he got amped up, he played in a way that like, I mean, I, he tore some t-shirts on me. Like, he was no joke. Babe, he ate your wallet. Yeah, which if I told the story of why that was stressful, it would give away a lot about fucking certain situations.

But I'm not going to, just about bullshit timelines. But anyway, yeah, but he did a lot more than just eat my wallet. You know, I had one of those, like, you know, coffee table, like wicker, circular coffee tables. He ate the whole thing, a full coffee table. I'm not talking about like, oh, he, you know, he ate my shoe. This was a full, like, living room coffee table. The whole thing. It didn't take very long.

Like, at the beginning, I was like, oh, shit, I was trying to stop him. And then it got so damaged, I was like, all right, well, you know, keep going. Because, like, what's the point of getting new? you're going to destroy that too. His toy was the coffee table. No, no, he literally ate it to nothing. Like, you know, every, every day I would sweep more of this wicker coffee table until the final bit was swept into a dustpan. Well, he also would be like an angel. Like, he loved cuddling with you and he was so cute. But then you would get this thing called the zoomies. Yeah, the witching hour. The witching hour where like I'd call you and I'm like, is, are you under attack?

Like what's happening? He had Restless Lake Syndrome. It was crazy. That's how I feel when I get restless leg syndrome. Crazy. Yeah, so that was a hard one, man. Honestly, if I could do all that again, and like a lot of people are against the shock collars,

but what people don't understand is Pit Bulls have an insanely high pain tolerance. And there was one trainer that believed in them, one trainer that didn't. But actually, I think I would have liked to try the shock. It's not like a big shot. I think I would have liked to try the shock collar on him for

the witching hour. I think he would have been responsive to it. And by the way, I'm not being an advocate for shock collars but for these big pits with high energy, I think they are good for helping them to control their impulses. Because there were times, man, when he would get ramped up.

One time, I had to get in the ocean. Because he hated the ocean. I had to get in the ocean just for him to calm down. Because he was too excited around you? Yeah, but when he would get his full ramp play mode was too much for me. Like he could like push you

down? Yeah, and he would like you know, rip your clothes and like it was just, it was a lot. Yeah. He was a lot. Flynn was a lot, but he was awesome. I know that you guys are like thinking like yeah well I no thank you. By the way, Flynn

spent the first two years of his life in a cage like he was a terrible like the redemption of Flynn I mean he had us redemption hour I can tell you but anyway he lives in Santa Maritches he lives in Santa Maritches now but his new owner is overfed him

I saw him once and I was like okay I didn't hear that it doesn't matter but uh he he needs I was trying to think of a pun on like Manjaro or Zempic or for dogs Zep bound yeah but I couldn't, I couldn't, he needs like pup bound. Um, anyway, listen.

Let's keep moving. Mound Jaro. Mound? The mound. What, what's the mound? Oh, pound. Sorry. Pond fail.

This is why I don't do puns. This is why I hate fucking puns. Never do your pun again. Okay. What's the other one? Oh, Wagovi. Is there anything with that? No, it doesn't matter. All right. Wagovi. Wagovi. Wagovi. Redemption. Anna's in her pun. Redemption era. Hanna likes pun. She's just in denial. It's just they're not funny. Oh, okay. I think Wagovi's pretty funny. Dog. It's like a funny. Dog goes out. Yeah, but you know, but Hannah, it's part of a bit.

The pun. It's not the whole bit, you know? What's wrong with with a ha in the middle of all the ha ha ha's? To have ha ha ha, you need at least one ha. Yeah, it just takes a lot of thought. Yeah. Like, oh God, like, seriously have to think right now? No, literally. Yeah, literally. Like, why don't I have to think? I'd sound like to make it laugh. Just make me laugh and I don't have to figure out an equation. As the temperature starts rising, I feel that urge to refresh my closet. But I don't want to waste money on a ton of new clothes, especially ones that I'm only going to wear a couple times, or it's going to rip, or like, I put it in the wash once, and it's gone. And a lot of summer clothes is like

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I'm triggered. No, I'm just joking. Okay. This is a little bit of a hard one because I am. I am extremely extroverted and a lot of relationships went downhill after the pandemic. But also, I basically lived by myself. It was me and my dog and then my dog died. So COVID was pretty really rough.

But because I was so extroverted and was literally forced to stay home by myself, like I didn't even have a bubble family. It's a long story. but anyways um because i was by myself i like was forced to be able to live myself by myself so by the end i don't know anyways it helps me be by myself in the future in my living circumstances i guess i don't know okay bye now maybe it was a haphazard articulation but uh very important well no because i 100% identify with the force solitude, you know, this, the sense of being on your own. Like, it is healthy.

It wasn't healthy for everybody, by the way. I understand that. But for somebody like me, perhaps like you, I don't know, I think it was good to just have some time to, like, not be, you know, not just performing to strangers, but also just that sense of, you know, wanting to get attention from people. And, you know, it just forces you to be, explore a part of yourself that perhaps is not your go-to self. Yeah, well, a lot of people avoid being alone with themselves, which honestly, I should more often because that's, it's easy to spiral. But when you're forced to, you face some demons that maybe you really were suppressing.

So it definitely wasn't easy. But slowing time down and allowing you to. to reflect on your life will only make you grow. Yeah, I mean, for me it was great because I've had plenty of time, plenty of self-reflection throughout my life. But as I've talked about before,

my mom had died the year before and I immediately was touring afterwards and I was literally touring a show about my mom dying. And, you know, that's all well and good but it's all not performative because performative is like a negative term, but like it's all very, you know, external

and it comes with like immediate gratification from the audience and this sense of like wow you really understand grief but like it was really lacking in the actual grieving you know so i got the i got the enforced uh grieving you know of just like hey now take it in emotionally which was great but it's not it wasn't just about the grief it's just about like just life you know it's just like okay now i got to feel it you know now i got like i've no choice you do run from your feeling sometimes I haven't processed an emotion since 94.

I wrote the song a long time ago. I wrote the song a long time ago in 94. You ever see that two-pack sketch? No. There's so many two-pack songs that you're like, it's a Dave Chappelle show sketch.

Oh, he doesn't remember. No, no. So he's like dancing and then he's like slowly but surely you realize like, Tupac's still alive. Because he'd be like, yo, you dancing there with your girlfriend.

I see her. He's like no shit about his life. He's like, I wrote the song a long time ago, in 94. And you're like, what are you talking about? It's happening right now. You know, anyway, good sketch to watch, guys. But 94, you were three. I know, it's a joke.

I just like saying 94. You know when people are older and they're like, yeah, in 72. And now I realize, like, I am that old person that says, like, in 97. Well, yo, like the 90s, like, so I was listening to Grunge the other day. I actually started crying. When Pearl Jam's Alive came on, man. I got like emotional because it was like weird

I was like processing like adolescent emotions like all over again but like when I was a kid and you would turn on WCBS the oldies were from the 60s but actually when I was a kid in the 80s

the song had to be from the 50s for the experience that I had listening to Pearl Jam the other day and the 50s 30 years ago. Yeah. That fucking hurt my soul. 50s was like Elvis?

Like late 50s was Elvis. Yeah. Like 50s is before rock and roll. Yeah. Yeah. Before you were allowed to move your legs on stage. Yeah. Yeah, the processing of emotions is interesting because when I feel an emotion sometimes, I go,

oh no, like I'm not doing well. I'm emoting something. I'm not just happy. But it's great that you were able to. enjoy the process of feeling emotion of grief. I just want to make you feel old. When I was in the 80s listening to WCBS, it was a golden oldies,

and a song came on from the early 60s. You know, like the Beatles or something. That now is Christina Aguilera. Just so you know. Go to the next one. Go to the next one. That is foot of shit right there. I used to listen to Beatles, though, a lot.

Yeah, but. that's Christine Aguilera now for, you know, just comparing like the amount of time that has passed. And because Aguilera looks exactly like she did at that time. So, okay, so since we're on that, that topic, let's, let's get a little deeper on it. Okay. Um, hi. So over the pandemic, I decided to try, uh, meditating. And that led to like a meditation challenge where I would do 20 minutes a day.

every day for a few months and then I noticed oh my gosh oops all my anxiety and depression and chronic back pain I've had since childhood is gone thanks meditation and then I got real curious about spirituality so I like launched on my spiritual journey over the pandemic and read a bunch of books and did a bunch of soul searching and now I'm a Buddhist how about that wow I really want to get into meditating

I've been telling myself that every day She was on that app, I think because I remember they were doing Headspace was doing those meditation challenges By the way, that's just an assumption Yeah I was using Headspace a lot

Headspace is a great app Great app, great app I was using Headspace a lot back then though Yeah I also Let's begin in the usual way There's clouds above you You're not going to attach to the thought

Sometimes He had a great voice He had a great voice. But it's honestly so impressive to, like, people who are meditating or taking time with their spirituality because it's not busy work. It's not, like, sending an email or, like, people don't see the improvement. It's, like, just something within you, which I think brings a lot of confidence. And not to bring up Grand Slam champion Kim Kleisters, but I was talking to her when I went on

her podcast about, like, her mentality and stuff. And she's like, I took a lot of time to work on. the mental stuff and I think not enough people during the pandemic or during her career during her career but I think like stopping and even though like you're not getting an award you're not showing off something online

stopping and working on your own stuff is beyond beneficial and I want to normalize that yeah I mean just you said I want to meditate so bad but all you have to do to meditate is just decide to do it I just, whenever I close my eyes, I fall asleep. Well, don't close your eyes then.

In fact, Buddhist meditation, they don't close their eyes. Actually, I did see there is a meditation out there for open-eyed meditating. Well, my memory from my little delves into Buddhism, if I could just mansplain meditation for a moment. Yes. No, because I took you to the, I took you to the dogsham bearer. I took you to the most beautiful place on the planet, Buddhist retreat center in West Cork. And we met a cat that. that climbed on our backs

and walked with us named Roxy and the cat passed away and I still haven't processed that emotion. RIP. I haven't processed it. But they have another cat there. Somebody messaged me. Anyway, I did some meditation workshops

there and I was surprised to learn when I got into Buddhism that time that they meditate with the eyes open because the meditative state is not like a sleeping state. You're meant to be present.

Yeah. You know? So there's nothing stopping you, keeping your eyes open. But back then I was obsessed with, my hip mobility was so bad that I found sitting in the crisscross apples sauce very hard, actually. No, it is for a lot of people.

But I got better at it as a result. But a lot of it was just like trying to get comfortable crisscross apples. Babe, should we get into couples meditation? What's couples meditation? We look into each other's eyes for 20 minutes every morning. And you have to hold each other's hand and make sure our breath becomes

one. Wow. Tantric torture. Have you been listening to Sting or something? I actually made that up. Imagine I'd make up a thing and make you do it every morning with me. But wasn't, didn't they make fun of that, that woman? Wouldn't they like, oh no, she was doing the love, the love explosion or something? Oh, yeah. The love. What was that again?

The love shaking or something. I don't know, but she got bullied online for it. The discipline, the discipline of meditation is like, you just can't beat it, you know? Because, because, listen, I don't care what religion you are. Whatever you believe in, I believe in you believing in it. They all have their different things. But the one thing about meditation that I like is that there's science behind it in terms of quietening the mind, you know? It's just literally about energy. Now, it's very interesting that she said her back pain went away because, you know, Howard Stern, whether you're a fan or not, he always pushed hard that book, which I've never read, about that back pain is mental.

and he said he read that book and his back pain went away. And it's interesting that she experienced some inner peace and her back pain went away. Very interesting. I mean, I do believe that the mental and physical does connect in certain ways. Yes. That's very, very fascinating.

And what a great example of a social experiment gone right. I would never push any particular religion, but there's definitely, you cannot argue, that there are aspects of Buddhism that are just so positive. I mean, I am not religious in any capacity and I haven't really learned about a lot of religions. I did take Buddhism, a Buddhism class in college,

and Becca and I, my best friend, they'd meditate in the beginning of class and she would just make me laugh, and that was torture. But I was like, if I was going to do a religion, it would be Buddhist. There's disappointing things about every religion. In fact, I read the book called the Tibetan Book of Living and Dying,

written by Sogiel Rimpershé, who then ended up with a scandal, and that's always disappointing. So that's kind of a lot of the time. The problem with religion, right, is that the institutions are flawed. Yes. You know?

And once I think it's big enough that there's money involved and there's power involved, there will be issues. However, I do think that the goodness out of that, actually, the goodness out of most religions, actually. If you could, the institutions are the issue.

But the great thing, about Buddhism is they push compassion, you know, love and kindness. And most religions have elements of compassion, but it really is like the core of Buddhism, you know? Babe, should we become Buddhist? We can definitely take the shit from Buddhism that we like, you know? But also the core of Christianity really is compassion, but if you listen to a lot of the Christians, it's really not a lot of compassion out there right now, in my opinion. But we don't have time to get into it. I do love when people, you know, like, people always go,

they try to say, so this, the new thing is that they try to say that Hitler was left wing, that Hitler was a socialist because, you know, it's the national socialist, whatever, but, but he wasn't, okay? Right-wing fascism is what it was. So there's always people that, you know, when these right-winger say, like, oh, Hitler was left-wing, and then somebody always writes, Jesus was left-wing. And I stand by that, Jesus was left-wing.

I stand by that. We don't get political on this pod, but I'm just checking that one out there. He had compassion. That's one thing for sure. If Jesus and Buddha were hanging out, they would have a lot of discussions and they would vote for Bernie.

Anyway. I've lost control of the pod. I've lost control. Are you done mansplaining to all the girls? You look like you're starting a cult right now. All right. Anyway, great, great prompt, man. Sorry, great, great message in.

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and the difference between the two was too much for me to handle. As you know, Hannah runs hot. Helix mattress, so breathable, so comfortable for me. I just, I love it. My back got a bit of an issue with the back. Not just because I'm getting old, because actually, even when I was younger than Hannah had an issue with my back, the Helix mattress definitely has made my back feel better. You guys got to get in on it. And the great news is that they have a deal at the moment. Go to Heelix mattress. HelixSleep.com slash burn. That's Helixleep.com slash burn for their summer sale offer of 20% off site wide from June 2nd to June 12th, 2025.

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to sign up for built today this is this is a cool story actually so the pandemic slash lockdown was a terrible terrible time but it basically led to me having a home birth with my second child my son was born in December of 2020 and due to all the restrictions and my doctor not being very supportive about me wanting to try a vaginal birth after having a C-section with my first, I basically decided that women are a lot stronger than we give ourselves credit for. And if I wanted to do things my way and have my daughter meet her brother on the day he was born and be able to do things my way, I was going to have to do it at home. so I did successfully have him at home

and it was magical and beautiful and I'd like to thank the pandemic for that. That's pretty cool. I love that she was like, this is what I want to do and I'm going to do it because women have been popping babies out of their pussies at home since 94. She's not in the beginning of time.

But you know, because my mother had to have three C-sections because I was the C-section. I was an emergency. Wait, so is that the rule? Like once you start with one, then they changed that rule. obviously they have, but I still think that, I still think it's a thing where they discourage vaginal birth after a C-section. I think. I think that's why she's saying that it wouldn't

happened without. Yeah. And she had a home birth, which is pretty cool. Yeah. But she basically was saying she wanted her kid to meet the kid in the beginning so they could like be friends immediately. Yes. I love that she believed in it. She knew what she wanted. She knew what she felt comfortable with and she executed it. Would you want to have a home birth? I don't know anything. about birth. Yeah. So I'm not going to try to speak on it. But I don't know anything either. The only thing I know is that my mother had to have three C-sexes. That's the only thing I know. Did she complain about it? I don't think so. I, I know is my mom had two births with no drugs. Really? My mom was very... Did she have an epidural? No. Really? She just raw dogged it. So it's

kind of putting pressure on me to be like, oh, am I a real woman? Because God forbid I get epidural. My mom's Oh, you got to get an epidural. You get an epidural. Why wouldn't you? There's risks to epidurals. Is there? To an extent. I don't know.

But like women. I had an epidural would have my knee surgery. Oh, wow. Yeah. And my hip surgery. But also, it's true, women are extremely strong and have, deal with like pit bulls. We have a very high pain tolerance. I got a...

Yeah, like when you get too amped up, you're a problem. I have to go in the ocean. I can't. handle it. There was like a, I was on an algorithm for a while because I watched a couple like birthing videos, which like you never see. And

it was just crazy. I'm like, wow, I've known nothing about this time in a woman's life. And sometimes they're in like little homemade pools in their living room. Yeah, that stuff. Yeah. It's wild. Or let me play this because I thought this was interesting. Hi, mom and dad. This is a

perfect problem for me because during the pandemic literally life-changing thing that I did was become vegan and I know there's mixed opinions on veganism on this podcast but I just wanted to share that I am vegan you have vegan listeners and at the time I was like 15 16 that was like 2022 and now I'm literally 19 I'm still vegan I have yet to want to change so just wanted to you know share the positivity of being vegan on the podcast so I love you guys we I love our Gen Z vegan listeners yeah I I want to know what the mixed opinions about veganism is on our pod I we had a we had a rant last week but what was the rant though because I I think

veganism is great yeah you were you were positive about veganism like the everything behind veganism what stands for the purpose but then when I think we were joking about like how people like to tell you they're vegan. Oh right. What would you think? Oh yeah. Or I might have made that up. I don't know but veganism was brought up. The person that message in recently was saying that they

became like oh they started like saving like taking animals out of slaughterhouses and stuff. And then they started eating meat for a guy. And yeah I want to say that I think veganism is great. I am not a vegan and and I also own that but I think it's great.

No, when you hear it, you're like, yeah, that sounds like what we should be doing. Yes, 100%. It is a time definitely where, again, yeah, you can, you were able to slow your life down to, like, question all your life choices because, like, you weren't distracted by, like, catching the subway on time or, like, meeting up with someone. You was just you and you and deciding what you were eating and what you stood for. You had time to do that, but also. And the Buddhist, you know, the true Buddhists don't eat meat either. what could the karma of it all

well yeah and also they believe that you shouldn't kill sentient beings yeah well but also with that said like mental health was a real problem in the pandemic because you were so alone and you had no distractions um and we're dealing with

all your stuff with with no um you know distractions so it caused a lot of problems what was that related to no because I was thinking about how when you're left alone you question a lot of

what you eat and how you think and your religion I got you gotcha I got you got you all right I mean I think that's I think that's it

you know I mean we have we have other ones we'll play some out let's play some out play some out and oh my God we love our burner phone listeners so much

Des'll see you in the Spotify comments I do wash my hands more somebody let me play this quick okay hi Hannah hi Des I have to be It's so quiet because I'm on vacation with household people.

What was the prompt if you? I'm a little high. I'm on vacation in Colorado. You can't not use the natural state supplies. The prompt was, oh, something positive that happened to me during COVID. I would say, um, okay, don't touch me, but. I used to not, like, wash my hands very much. And now I literally wash my hands so much that my knuckles freaking crack.

Because people are so gross. Germs are so gross. And I think COVID just showed me how nasty people are. Because when those plastic things were up, they would be, like, spit on them. You know what I'm saying? I'm sorry. I'm so glad I played that.

Look, sing happy birthday while you wash your hands. Yeah, sing happy birthday twice. Why? Oh, I'm doing wrong. I definitely wash my hands more because of the pandemic. Yeah, thousand percent. And I was not a not hand washer, but like, I, you know, like my whole perception, like, I felt like I could feel germs on my hands.

I've actually always been obsessed with washing my hands. I hate when they're dirty. I, like, can't focus if my hands are dirty or sticky or smell like a dog. I love washing my hands. but I think we all got cleanlier. Yeah. But the way you left that message, it sounded like you were saying,

we live in a society where washing your hands is illegal. So I have to let you know that I'm... It was giving handmade's tail. I'm a hand-wash. Yeah, very handmade's tail, man. You know? Under his eye, baby. Under his eye.

Thank you guys so much for listening to Burner Phone. I announced my new tour where I'm going in the fall. Make sure you get tickets now. I'm going to add Toronto. Toronto will be added. Yeah, because you have to do Toronto. Yes.

Nice. Don't worry. Oh, nice. Don't you guys worry. Toronto, I actually have a special plan for. Oh. So just, that's why it's taking a little longer. Oh, sorry about that.

But it's definitely happening. Because there's been a lot of messages. I got to tell you that the burn of phone hotline is being used as a, as a. I don't know what happened, but like I love Canada. And like, it's like the best shows. and my two Vancouver shows sold out already and Toronto is coming and I think I'm moving to Canada

Well, I wasn't born in the United States we might be forced to go this stage Hannah's gone, Hannah's going to the bathroom so I'm going to wrap it up guys Anyway, keep an eye on Hannah's tour dates Hannah and I both are in West Hampton Beach, Long Island in August. Hannah's doing, I think, the 6th and 7th or no,

the 7th and 8th and I'm doing August 14th I only just put mine on. So that's Thursday, August 14th, where I stand to Beach Long Island, which is basically the next shows because by the time you hear this, Hannah and I will have already finished our shows in Stanford, Connecticut.

So other than that, I have a San Francisco date on my website, and then I'm adding a ton of dates in the America and in Ireland. So anyway, great to see you guys. Listen, spread the word about the pod, okay? You know, I really feel like we have a good rhythm. So get the word out there.

Thanks for all your comments. Thanks for all your messages. And we will talk to you guys soon. Oh, and actually, one quick thing, but admin, never be afraid to message after the fact in your voice. Any feedback you want to give about the episode. Like, if there's something that you've heard that you want to like follow up on, you know, that could also make it in.

Because the link is always the same for the Telby where you leave the voice messages. So if you know the link and you want to engage in the conversation, Don't hesitate. Okay, guys. Bye. I think the best thing that came out of COVID was the fact that nobody had plans. Nobody had weddings, bridal showers, baby showers, any other events, any other events, And it was the best thing ever as someone that worked in the emergency department in a hospital in

Queensland during the pandemic. So enough said on that. It was the best thing on my days off to just do nothing, have no plans, enjoy my life with my husband because, you know, post-crazy pandemic every weekend is just filled with everyone else's events, birthdays, showers, all the things. So the best thing that came out of COVID was literally no plans. And I kind of wish we could go back to that. Love you guys. K bye. Hi, Hannah. Hi, Des. Oh, my gosh. I've never actually sent in a prompt before. But I was living in New York City in a job that I was absolutely miserable in. And when COVID hit, everyone kind of fleed the city. So I was like, this is my chance. I quit my job.

I moved back home in with my mom at 30 years old in Colorado, and I spent the next six months during lockdown studying for the LSAT to go to law school. It was a secret dream I've always had, and I don't think I would have had the guts to quit my successful New York City career and just completely changed careers at the age of 29. So I always thank COVID for that, because I don't think I would be a lawyer now and actually loving what I do for work and loving life. Bye. I used to have 15 food allergies and my doctor prior to the pandemic wanted me to start trying foods, but it's hard to kind of prepare yourself to get sick because you have a life

and you have plans and you don't want to eat something and get sick. But then COVID happened and I had no plans pretty much indefinitely. So I tried nearly all the foods I was allergic to with great success. And now I barely have any allergies. I have one allergy. Hi, Mom and Dad. Love your podcast. Love you guys.

Love seeing you on the Luliman website, Hannah. One thing that happened to me that was positive from the pandemic was I stopped drinking alcohol. Well, not at first. I think a lot of us, at least for me, there was nothing to do during the pandemic, so I just resorted to drinking and it wasn't like, you know, terrible, but it was just, it became a daily habit and it became my source of release and escape and honestly entertainment. And then it made me realize that, oh, this is not a healthy habit. it just exacerbated what was already there and showed me that this is not a healthy habit that I have and a healthy way of coping with emotions.

So yeah, it led me to realize I needed to be sober and I would not change it for anything. Love you guys. Thanks so much. Hi, Hannah. Hi, Dez. First time caller, long time listener. I'm up in Canada. I know how much Dez loves us international listeners. Anyways, the best thing to come out of

the pandemic for me is people staying out of your fucking personal space or your bubble, what have you. Nothing infuriates me more than when you're at the checkout line and someone's breathing down your fucking neck. So during the pandemic, we had this six feet apart rule. Honestly, I wish they made it 12. Made my life exponentially better. I have, however, noticed that people have began reverting back to their ways, how rude. In that instance, I have a life hack for you and what you do is you just casually step back but you make sure that you stomp on their fucking foot and then you just look at them like oh my god sorry i didn't realize you were standing so fucking close to me ah the beauty of covid so many so many things i could touch on

here but one of the greatest things that i feel like has had a cascading effect in my life was the realization that being extroverted is not my jam and that I am actually in fact an extroverted introvert so I actually really enjoy time by myself not having to deal with other people's expectations and or their energy and just like being in my own lane like I just feel like I've been like oh I can just like float down this river of life and not have to surround myself with places people jobs that are just unbearable like life shouldn't be unbearable and and it doesn't need to be you got to find your way to float anyway love you guys bye quarantine actually led me to my husband I met him about

three or four months prior to the world shutting down in March of 2020 and we had to communicate and come to a tough decision of whether we were going to quarantine together and see each other all the time and be on top of each other or quarantine separately and maybe never see each other and who knows what would happen. So we had tough conversation and decided to quarantine together crazy enough and it led us to getting married a year and a half later in July of 2022. So I think it all worked out for the best and I don't know if we would be together or have our sweet little one-year-old and be expecting another one without it. So quarantine created my family.

Hi, mom and dad, Canadian caller here. I'm a big giggler and dialer, but this is my first time calling in. So thanks for the podcast. Love you both. My favorite thing that came out of COVID is definitely grocery pickup. As a mom with two kids, I do not have time to be bringing them to a grocery store. having them throwing different items into the cart that they see. It's so nice to just do the ordering on my phone and then pick a time, go get the groceries,

maybe even get a coffee and just sit alone in my car for a few minutes, drink that coffee while they load everything. And now what used to be like a huge hassle of in-store shopping is now just all done, a click of a button. So yeah, I'll talk to you guys soon. Bye.