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Coffee Convos with Kail Lowry and Lindsie Chrisley - Taking Nudes

Episode Date: July 17, 2025

CC425: Kail is taking and sending nudes... for science purposes! Lindsie wonders if they'll ever get married again..Thank you to our sponsors!Better Help: This episode is brought to you ...by BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/coffee today to get 10% off your first month.DraftKings: Download the DraftKings Casino app and sign up with promo code COFFEEProgressive: Visit Progressive.com to learn more!Rocket Money: Cancel unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com/COFFEECONVOSShady Rays: Go to ShadyRays.com and use code COFFEE for 35% off polarized sunglassesStamps: Visit Stamps.com and use code COFFEE for a 4-week trial, free postage, and a digital scale!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:01:20 or someone close to you, please contact Connex Ontario at 1-866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor free of charge. Bet MGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. I hate gift giving and receiving. Receiving gifts is so weird. What do you say thank you? This is Coffee Convos with Kale Lowry and Lindsey Chrisley.
Starting point is 00:01:40 I really want you to be in your feels, Kale. That does not interest me whatsoever. I feel very attacked by you. A spirited discussion about motherhood, friendship, family, and life in the public eye. I'm just not with the fakery anymore. There's a fakery bakery around here. Here's Kale and Lindsay. Good morning, kitty cat. Good morning, kitty. I have a bunch of questions I need to ask you. Nothing like being interrogated at night. Yes. OK, so you've been through the whole, like, braces thing
Starting point is 00:02:09 with just one so far? Yes, and then expander with number two. OK, so Jackson did the expander and then the first round of braces. Did you do rounds of braces with Isaac or just one set? Just one. Um, cause Elliot didn't need any expanders or anything. So he just got the braces.
Starting point is 00:02:32 Lincoln needed the expander and then he'll get his, he'll just get one round of braces. Okay. So Jackson was a very late, like tooth getter and loser. So he didn't remember first tooth until after he was one years old. Oh, yeah, no, I started freaking out because when you read like all the stuff online, which probably shouldn't do about like milestones and stuff, it's like, oh, they should start getting teeth around this time. No buds for teeth were coming. So I was like, did I birth like, like always toothless child. So I told Will, I was like, did I birth like a like always toothless child?
Starting point is 00:03:06 So I told Will I was like, we've got to go get him scanned. Like we've got to take him to a dentist. He was like, Lindsay, the dentist does not see children at this age. And I'm like, well, no, you need to understand he doesn't have any fucking teeth. Fair. I mean, both of y'all had valid points. So finally gets teeth. I don't think he lost his first tooth until he was eight years old. I remember him being late, but that's a good thing.
Starting point is 00:03:30 It's allegedly a sign of like really strong, healthy teeth. Well, then he must have really strong ones. He's going to get scanned for his retainers today because his braces are coming off. I feel like I'm going to be an emotional basket case. Yeah, because I feel like braces are like a right of passage. It's like he's a boy to a young man. You know what I mean? It's like the, I don't know, but some kids don't get braces at all. So I guess they don't have a right of passage. But well, then they can do the new TikTok thing that I saw where
Starting point is 00:04:05 people are ordering. I wish they had these back in the day when we used to make like fake retainers out of paper clips. Oh, yeah. And gum wrappers. Yeah. Okay. Well, now I just saw on tick tock, where there are these like, things that look like braces. And you put them on? Yes. What? I just remember being a kid and wanting braces so bad. So bad. And it was like every day you went to school, you were hoping
Starting point is 00:04:34 that your teacher dropped a paperclip because that was going to be your right of passage. And now I have, look at this paperclip behind my teeth. Oh yeah, okay, so that's where we're going next. So he's getting scanned for these retainers, but since he has not lost all of his teeth, we were doing braces and phases. So he'll do like phase one braces and then he'll lose the rest of his teeth and then he'll go back into braces, but for a shorter period of time. And I'm like, I wanted to do that because I didn't want him to be metal mouth when he's like a senior in high school. They will not put a permanent retainer on the bottom of his teeth for round one braces. And I'm absolutely
Starting point is 00:05:14 terrified and I feel like it's going to be the biggest fight that I've signed up for since my divorce. To get him to wear his retainers? Yes. I mean, I just told Elliot like like you better wear your fucking retainer Yeah, I mean he still wears it cuz I can tell when his teeth start shifting I can tell and you're like you haven't been Wearing it and that's only happened one time since he got them off But I was I noticed that he hadn't I don't know if it was because he was going back and forth between me and dads
Starting point is 00:05:42 Or what but I was like your teeth are shifting and I can tell. And then he never didn't wear it again. Okay. Well, there's going to be no excuse for that because Will's actually taking him to this appointment and I said, you are to tell the orthodontist that he needs two sets of retainers, one for your house, one for my house, because we are not shifting retainers back and forth. That's what we did too, because it's not worth the, I get it and not everyone has the flexibility
Starting point is 00:06:08 or the funds to do that, but you know, that was one thing that I ended up asking for to make it easier. Same for sports, like I don't know if anyone else is in a co-parenting situation, where you go back and forth between households and there's just certain things that I don't wanna have to keep track of through both houses.
Starting point is 00:06:23 So if you have the extra money to get a second jersey or second pair of cleats or whatever it is, like, I just feel like it definitely cuts down on the need for communication for certain stuff when it comes to sports, just like specifically because we alternate the weekends. So sometimes he's taking him to a game, sometimes I am. And if you think that I'm running jerseys back and forth, I'm just not like I'll go broke and pay the extra 40. Lincoln didn't, we didn't get extra jerseys for Lincoln this year. And it was just constantly, oh, he forgot his uniform.
Starting point is 00:06:56 Oh, can you drop this off? Oh, hey, we don't have this. We don't have that. And it was on both ends. And I was just like, we're not I can't do this again. So the next thing that I wanted to talk to felt was what is the deal with boys with fucking perms? perms? Wait, is that not a thing? Like where you live?
Starting point is 00:07:15 Not, not that I know of. What is the trend? Like, what is it? I kill every kid that I see around here from ages, maybe like fourth grade all the way through high school, these boys are perming their hair. Perming to make it curly? Yeah. Why? It's, I guess Jackson says it's a vibe. Oh, so I'm sure up here we'll be late to the trend.
Starting point is 00:07:40 I have not seen that yet. Okay, well, I was calling around all day yesterday, trying to find a local place that still does perms because like nowhere does them. I found like an elderly lady at a salon. I don't want his hair to go and get fucking burnt off, but I'm gonna let him do it. Wait, Jackson wants to do it? Yeah, he wants a perm. And so he texted me yesterday and he was
Starting point is 00:08:07 like, Mom, my braces coming off before sixth grade, and me getting a perm is gonna look amazing. I love him so much. Like, all right, buddy, like I cannot I cannot wait for this for you. Will is completely against perm. They don't grow out. I had a perm actually I'm allergic to the perm solution. It burns back my neck, but That just reminded me when you said that Jackson was like back to school with the braces off in the hair back to school is a thing already not up here because we go back after Labor Day, but I
Starting point is 00:08:43 Literally just put for Amazon Prime Day deals or whatever I just put all their school supplies in my cart because I wanted to see what was like on sale or whatever but I cannot believe that I'm already like I already bought the kids backpacks for back to school I'm buying school supplies like this summer goes by so freaking fast. It goes by so fast we start school in like, three weeks. When did y'all get out? We got out right before, right before Memorial Day is which one I always get confused. Labor Day is in September, right? And then Memorial Day is in May. Okay, yeah. We got out right before that.
Starting point is 00:09:22 So I think it was like the Friday going into that weekend. And then we go back August 1. I just feel like it's not enough time. There's not enough time to like go do like, I have so much I want to do with them still. I know we have hardly even been home, which I'm kind of sad about. It's like we pay these mortgages and then we don't even like use the house over the summer. But I feel like he's just had such a good summer and I feel like we have done so much but there's so much more that I still want to do. Yeah, I just feel like everything was cut short already with back to school. We went
Starting point is 00:09:57 to Dick's Sporting Goods and I saw they had the backpacks out and I was like, well, you want a specific backpack, go get it now before they sell out. But I was just like, damn, summer is not long enough. And what is the alternative? Like, would we like two, six week breaks or like multiple three week breaks throughout the year better than a full summer? Or do we like the full summer vibe? No, I mean, I love the full summer situation. Um, but in our area, I don't know if it's common everywhere around here, but I know specifically for our county, we have almost a week off every six weeks.
Starting point is 00:10:32 Okay, so you guys get like the fall break, the winter break, the spring break. Yeah, we get like all of that. But it's really just enough to fuck up the schedule. Like I always wish that they would do maybe like an extended weekend situation every six weeks and then just extend time to the summer break. I see what you're saying. That makes sense. We get there's every month has at least one three day weekend for us, but we don't have fall break or we just don't have fall break. Okay, back to the backpack situation for a second because I just ordered backpacks yesterday too.
Starting point is 00:11:10 I need to know if you are the type of person that has to have the matching backpack to the matching lunchbox. I prefer it that way. We have other like individual lunchboxes, but I do prefer a good matching because that way you know that's your lunchbox and you but I do prefer a good matching because that way you know that's your lunchbox and you don't have to worry about it matching somebody else's.
Starting point is 00:11:31 Okay, so I kept last year's lunchbox because I had purchased multiple lunchbox lunchboxes throughout the year because once they start looking ratty, gotta go. This one was maybe like a month old by the time school ended. So I kept the extra one because Jackson always leaves his lunchbox at fucking school. So can you just use like a brown paper bag? I mean, I just kind of like feel bad if I'm sending him with a brown paper bag. Like, I don't want to if he's gonna lose it. And you know what I mean? Just let him throw the whole thing out. Look like he crawled off the street coming up into the middle school.
Starting point is 00:12:08 No, I have had to send because I only regularly have like one lunchbox. I'm not an over purchaser on stuff like that. I've had to send his lunch and like gallon Ziploc bags before because he'll come home and I'm like, where's your lunchbox? And he just looks at me like I'm stupid. He's like, wait, I have one of those? Yeah. Like, I don't know, mom, what's it look like? So you have to get the matching one so you know it's like, this goes with your backpack.
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Starting point is 00:14:43 I also need to discuss with you about this middle school shit because I'm starting to get like a little bit panicked. I mean, the perm has almost taken me flat the fuck off my feet. Okay. The no braces is also taking me out and now going into middle school and he has already contacted me about going back to school shopping, which he has never had an interest like doing that ever. What's happening? No, I don't know. Because back to school shopping. I've always done just mainly done online for them. I like choose their stuff. I think Elliot last year, maybe started doing something
Starting point is 00:15:23 for himself. But and then like Lincoln, I don't know if Jackson's there yet, but like that weird stage of like puberty where you're like in between sizes and you're having growth spurts and you're like, what the fuck is going on? Oh, yeah. I told him that he was not getting white socks during back to school. Okay. The typical uniform is he will only wear black shorts. Oh, like he has a uniform at school. No, it's his uniform that he has decided that he's wearing for the rest of his life. What do you say when he comes up with this? Okay, so
Starting point is 00:15:57 I'll just give you an example. We were at the beach, I pack him like all the things nice and tidy, stack of shorts. He comes running naked knowing that he had clean shorts that were like a different color than black shorts. And he's like, Mom, I need black shorts. So you don't need black shorts. Like, you have all of your shorts are the DSG brand. They're the same.
Starting point is 00:16:20 They fit the same. Everything's the fucking same, except they're not black. He's like, just buy me black shorts from now on. I don't want to wear any other color shorts, just black shorts. Oh, that's I mean, it definitely makes life easier. I will say that. Yeah, except for the money that I spent buying colored shorts before I knew that like black shorts were the only option. True, true, true, true.
Starting point is 00:16:46 I will say DSG brand has some good stuff. I loved exporting goods. I just got, um, a bra by, I don't even know how to pronounce it. It's Carrie Underwood's brand over there. Yeah. Yeah. I've seen it. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:17:01 I, I just got one of those bras and I love it. And I wish that I could buy, I think it's Aerie or American Eagle biker shorts. I wish I could buy them in every single pattern in every single color because I love them that much. So I'm like Jackson where I fixate and once I find something good, I want the same thing in every color, every pattern,
Starting point is 00:17:21 or I want the same exact thing in multiple colors, in multiple of the same color. in multiple colors in multiple the same color. I'm kind of like that if I find something that I like like I have repurchased Amazon sets like and just a different color wave. Yep, same or like the London that I like I'm going to three pack I buy three three packs. But I am not repurchasing the same thing of like what I had. So if it was like a black set, I'm not buying that same black set again. It probably depends what it is for me, because I would rebuy leggings. If I especially if I'm like, okay, I really like these black,
Starting point is 00:17:56 whatever I might buy the same another pair. Okay, next thing that I need to discuss with you is I have a hair appointment this week, which I'm so excited about. I've been trying to make my hair blonder and it just seems to not be working. Is it turning gold? Yes. Do you have well water? No, I do not. And I actually have a filter like on my, so I have two shower heads in the shower that
Starting point is 00:18:22 I regularly shower in and I have a filter on there because I was told that that would help it. I'm either going to show up next week with brown hair again because I can't do the gold. I'm either cutting my hair off or putting extensions back in. Do you use purple shampoo? I hate purple shampoo because it makes my hair look like silver. Interesting. I also have never been able to get my blonde to like a platinum blonde. It's always been like a
Starting point is 00:18:53 yellow blonde. So I don't if anyone has any suggestions, I would love to hear it. I need a drop root I need a smudge root or whatever the hell this is called because I been I got to start taking my new truffle again, my hair is just not doing great. Why are we still suffering from twins? No, I think it's just because I like was bleaching it and then I didn't bleach it and then I went back to bleaching it. So like just it being just fried.
Starting point is 00:19:23 I need to know if anybody else that colors their hair has this problem once you put bleach on it. Do you feel like your hair is so much more dry than if you're just letting it be brown because Mine feels like horse hay right now. Yeah, it does mine does too. Okay So at what point do you just give it up hang it up and you're just like, okay This is the phase of life me 35 years old, I'm just going to be mousy brown. Honestly, I keep going back and forth with that. Like my hair is also not dirty. I don't know why it looks like that. I just washed it. I'm at the point where I don't think I
Starting point is 00:19:57 don't think I can handle the blonde anymore. Well then you know what that answers my question. I guess I'm going to go back brunette. Are you so refreshed since you came back from the lake? Absolutely not. Watching my children be ungrateful in another fucking city and another lake at another location is not necessarily my idea of a vacation. That was a trip for the kids. That was a lake trip for the children.
Starting point is 00:20:22 That was not for mom. You know, I always say, well, actually, let me back that up. I always heard my parents say, growing up, like when you take your kids on vacation, like we need a vacation from that vacation. Yeah. And no truer statements have ever been made in life. Just experienced that as well. And now I'm on a seven day stretch
Starting point is 00:20:47 with no kids under this roof. Oh. Which I am not used to because you know, we don't do like the week and then the week, but because I wanted to extend the beach trip, Will was like, okay, you can keep them for the seven days. And then when he comes home, I'll keep them for seven days. So I was like, okay, lit.
Starting point is 00:21:04 I need every part of this seven days. So I was like, okay, lit. I need every part of this seven days to recover. 1000%. And people will definitely say they're out of touch or this or that. We know. Also, we're in co-canting situations that allow us to have those feelings. Because I know a lot of people are like, oh, well, they don't understand what it's like to have kids full time. They don't understand. No, well, they don't understand what it's like to have kids full time. They don't understand. No, but you also don't understand what it's like to be us either to not
Starting point is 00:21:30 be able to have our kids full time. And at some point, I don't, I'm not speaking for everyone. I'm only speaking for myself. At some point you get, you reach a line where it's like, okay, this is my new normal and I, you have the best of both worlds, like you get to live a life where you're, I mean, obviously you miss out on things and that's have the best of both worlds like you get to live a life where you're I mean obviously you miss out on things and that's not the best of both worlds but you know you get the little break to decompress and then it's back at it. Sure thing. One of our listeners wrote in and said, Hey ladies, I love the podcast.
Starting point is 00:22:01 I'm hoping to get your thoughts and advice. My husband's mother moved to Florida a few years ago and hasn't seen her grandchild in two years. She flies home with her then-husband. They come over to visit the entire time she's on her phone and constantly going to the bathroom. Me and my husband catch on to the behavior and both casually walk behind her while she's on her phone. We catch what she's doing and she's looking at a man's naked ass on her phone, also zooming in on different pictures of guys. My granddaughter is trying to speak to her but she is preoccupied. Long story short, we confronted her about this and she goes on to tell us that some guy was scamming her etc. She left and went back to Florida, divorced her husband, got with this other guy that sent the picture she's posting pictures
Starting point is 00:22:45 of herself living her best life as she puts it, but does not concern herself with her kids or her grandkids she she is very concerned about herself and nothing else. She now has two grandkids of whom she has never met. Are we wrong for not wanting her in our kids lives until she admits her wrong and at least trying to make the effort there is so much more to unfold but I don't have enough room to type it all please let me know your thoughts.
Starting point is 00:23:11 My thoughts are that you cannot control what other people do no matter what you say no matter how what ultimate what ultimatum you give and then my second. The second part of that is that ultimatums ultimately don't work. So you just have to decide, is she in or is she out? And it sounds like she's out and you don't need to justify or explain. But I also think that it's unrealistic for you to say like, until she acknowledges or until she apologizes or until she does this or that just cut her out.
Starting point is 00:23:41 Like there is no until she does this, right? Like that's never cut her out. Like there is no until she does this, right? Like, that's never gonna work. I thought of you when I saw this quote the other day, and it says, just because your children might be related to someone and they have a title in their life doesn't mean that they have a place in their life. And that is so real. So so so real. It's unfortunate, but it's real. I had someone say something to me yesterday about like, you know, toxic family members and how do
Starting point is 00:24:12 you, how do you make that decision? Like, was there a final straw? And for me, it's not always like a final straw. It's just like every single time I have an encounter with you or I have a conversation with you or, you know, you're not, if I'm not aligned, we just have to go our separate ways and I can love you from a distance. I agree with that. I think in my specific situation, there definitely was, in fact, a final straw, but I don't think that's always the case for everyone. I think a lot of people will see patterns of behavior over periods of time. And then people just kind of wear out their welcome in your life.
Starting point is 00:24:54 What would you say to the woman that wrote in? Number one. So I don't know if I told you about this, but Kristin and I talked about these old ladies being scammed on words with friends. There was a whole documentary on it. That's awesome. I was telling somebody about this actually yesterday and I said, could you imagine ever being fucking scammed on words with friends? Getting to that point of your life that you have allowed someone to scam you out of
Starting point is 00:25:25 millions of dollars. Okay. Yeah. I feel like older people, it's probably more prevalent in like older people's age because I think they just get bored. And so they do this kind of stuff where they're seeking. I mean, now you got to think about people have like Facebook dating, and all this shit, right? And I feel like Facebook is very much like an app that's catered to older
Starting point is 00:25:50 generations. Damn, are we old? Well, I mean, I'm just like, I'm just not a huge Facebook girly. Like when I open up the app, it's literally to look at the podcast groups. Outside of that, I really just don't give a fuck what's happening on Facebook, but I feel like a lot of older people find people that they don't even know and are communicating with them on this app. No, I agree. I agree.
Starting point is 00:26:19 Okay. I feel like maybe it just makes them feel like they have a little spark in their life, a little excitement, you know? But you know what, maybe we need like an elderly friendly grandma style hinge, but like for older boomers and up. Maybe we should make it for them and it should not be words with friends. Um, I also feel like older people when they live enough of a distance, right? Um, let's say like two hours away or something, their life consists of certain things every single day. And when they come to visit, their habits don't really change their location did. So it's like that bitch just probably sits on her phone all the time looking at naked men.
Starting point is 00:27:11 Neck it naked men. You know what I mean? Older people look at naked people. That's not a thing. Like I don't feel like anybody after the age of 50 sends nudes. I beg to... If I looked like Kris Jenner, isn't she like 60? I would definitely send nudes. Majority of the population is not that. I mean, Halle Berry.
Starting point is 00:27:37 Kale, you're talking about celebrities. I mean... With unlimited access to funding, okay? I mean, unlimited access to funding. Okay. I'm going to literally, no, because I want to look like if I have to live through my sixties, I want to look like Kris Jenner. So I will be, I, you know, that corner I always talk about down here down by the family dollar right by my house, there is, they put a dollar general market directly across the street, I will be selling my body on the
Starting point is 00:28:07 corner in order to pay for the surgery that Chris Jenner got to her face. What do they call it tricking? Tricking I will be doing tricks on the corner. Okay. God, and I will look the fuck good. Okay, but I feel like nudes like probably are not that common after, let's say like 50 years old. Can we get a poll going? Let's get a poll going on our socials about nudes. How old, how old are you by the time you stop sending nudes? How about stop sending selfies in general?
Starting point is 00:28:41 Okay, I'm gonna ask you this. When was the last time you sent a nude? April. April? Damn, girl. Damn, girl. I definitely sent a nude in a year. At least two months ago. I haven't sent a nude in a year. I'm actually happy for you. I feel like what do we need thirst traps for? We don't actually need them. You know what? If I learned anything, which now come to think of it that I'm talking out loud, I should probably shut the fuck up because evidently I didn't learn anything until a year ago. When you're involved in a scandal, that should be your sign to just shut it the fuck down and do not send nudes. Here's the thing.
Starting point is 00:29:33 I had to take nudes for post-surgery. So I got my surgery in December. I'm roughly seven months post-op or six months post-op. I had to take regular nudes for the doctor. And so now I just keep taking them to compare to see if I'm, I don't want to gain weight. I'm scared of gaining weight now. So I'm like, hold on, let me just... This is an ad by BetterHelp. Workplace stress is now one of the top causes of declining mental health with 61% of the global workforce experiencing higher than normal levels of
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Starting point is 00:32:19 Are they like risque nudes or? No, they're very like, put your arms up, hold your hands up. It's like very like strategic. Wait, are those the ones you sent someone? I sent them to the doctor. Okay. Kristin said not spread eagle. Imagine I'm like, and here's my vagina spread eagle keep you like I didn't operate on that.
Starting point is 00:32:43 Wouldn't you like to be in other people's head as sick as this statement is about to be? Like in their head, thinking what they're thinking when they're taking a nude and they're like, oh, that's good. Like, that's a good one. Wait, I have to ask you a question because I came up in a conversation here. Yeah. Um, in any of your relationships or your marriage, did your man ever, did they sit down to wipe after they poop or do they stand up? What? That's what I'm saying. Like, do men stand up to wipe their asses or do they stay sitting
Starting point is 00:33:26 down? And I would hope I would hope that the men are staying sitting down. Unfortunately, for me, I talked to some people, some men who stand up to wipe their cracks. I mean, wouldn't that like, spread the turd? You know what I mean? Like because now the butt cheeks are touching. Like that doesn't even make sense. So I literally was shook and I said I'm going to talk about this on the podcast. Okay. I don't even want to tell you this. But for the sake of the conversation, I'm gonna fucking tell you anyway. So Jackson
Starting point is 00:34:07 FaceTimes and like walks around everywhere in both of our houses and we don't care. Please tell me why this is like, I'm going to say within the last eight weeks, I'm not going to give you a definite timeframe, but like very recently, why I was on a phone conversation with my child watching my ex husband take a shit. Oh, can this stance on the toilet? I'm like, why are your legs so far? Why did you peel your butt cheeks like apart before you sat down? He doesn't want to have to wipe that much. He just wants to be able to like... That seems like a very thought out process though. Like it
Starting point is 00:34:52 looked very methodical. Have you ever seen any, I was going to say any of your kids, have you ever seen Jackson put his feet up on the toilet and like squat into the toilet? No, we were at the lake literally last week. And my friend Emily's daughter comes and gets me and she's like, hell, I don't want to say which kid it was needs help on the toilet. And I go, okay. And I said, thank you. And so I go to walk in and his feet are up. Like he's like squatting already knew it's weed. And we mean him both just start laughing because I don't know
Starting point is 00:35:34 why he's like I do this day and I asked him afterwards. I said, Vicki, why were you? Why were you squatting on the toilet like that? He said to make you laugh. Oh my god. Okay, like, you're just squatting over the toilet. That reminds me a couple of shits ago. I decided that I need to order a squatty potty. Because I wonder it's like really good for you to have your feet elevated. Yeah. So I think I'm gonna order one you know, like when you start getting
Starting point is 00:36:03 older, you're like, okay, I really need to do things that are like, good for me. And I've heard about this. So I need to do it. So I'm going to order myself a squatty potty outside of that. I need to know how many men that you have been with that at nighttime, they sit on the toilet to take a pee. Okay, I, it is insane that you brought this up because I brought this up to someone last night. I have only seen one of my exes ever do this and it freaked me out, right? Like I never confronted him about it. I never said anything to him about it. But I was like, oh my like, in my in my own head, I was like, what the fuck was that about? Like I don't understand, whatever.
Starting point is 00:36:48 Last night it came up with somebody else and we were talking about it and he literally said it's because men don't want to turn the lights on in the middle of the night and have to aim into the toilet. And I was like, oh, thank God, because I thought it was deeper than that. Oh my God. You said I thought it was deeper. No, I'm just like, oh, thank God, because I thought it was deeper than that. Oh my God. You said, I thought it was deeper. No, I'm just like, why are you sitting? Is your dick not in the water?
Starting point is 00:37:13 I think, yeah, I think their dicks are in the water. It's like the dick becomes a floating device. And sometimes they get longer. What do you mean they get longer? Like not a boner, but like the blood flow causes it to get longer. Okay, well, let me tell you something about dicks, okay? So-
Starting point is 00:37:35 Wait, I'm telling Becky, Lindsay was talking about squatty potties and I thought of you, squatty. Cause you're the first person I know. She has one? To use one. perfect then I'll get all the deets from Rebecca okay so one time I was on the way home from Flottys and I had called Kristen for something and I don't know where I got
Starting point is 00:37:58 this information but like did you know that dick shrink over time with men's age no I knew they shrunk with weight. I mean, you would think that it would do like the opposite effect with weight, right? Like you would think that they would just like naturally look bigger. Because it would just stretch out? Like it would be like, do you know what I mean? But did you know, oh, Kristen said that her mom was the one that told us that basically it's a certain amount of percentage like every 10 years that a man's dick shrinks.
Starting point is 00:38:39 Like I'm not signing up for that. I think it must be frustrating to be a man and have to constantly worry about their dick sizes. But at the end of the day, being a woman is so much harder and I really don't like men's dicks are ugly no matter how old they are, no matter how much it shrinks, how much weight they gain, like dicks are ugly. Wouldn't you also like to be a fly on the wall of men taking dick pics? Because there is no way on earth that they, some of the dick pics that I've received unsolicited, that they look at
Starting point is 00:39:17 that and you're like, yeah, this is the one. Someone showed me a dick pic the other day of Someone so someone showed me a dick pic the other day of her ex. It was my cousin actually, um her ex and he sent her a dick pic and he squeezed the base of hard and he was trying to give it like some girth and some length. And I was like, this is humiliating. Thank God y'all broke up. Oh my God. No, when you get the unsolicited dick pics, because I know you get them frequently as well. Yeah. Are they always like a hard dick or there's like some flaccid ones in there? If I remember correctly, I think they're all pretty hard.
Starting point is 00:40:09 If you, you have to have like a very specific caliber of a dick for you to be willing to send a soft dick pic and you must be hung like a horse if you're sending a soft dick pic. I only know one person that could get away with sending a soft dick pic. In my life or in yours? One in mine and one in yours. Right, like nobody else should ever send.
Starting point is 00:40:34 Did I get it right? Um, yes, 1000% correct. And nobody else in their entire life should ever send me a dick pic, especially if it's soft unless it's that person, which he should also not send me a dick pic, especially if it's off unless it's that person, which he should also not send me a dick pic. If he sent a dick pic, I would post it. Is that considered revenge porn? Now there's a new law on revenge porn. I think it's in all 50 states. What is it? It's like a new thing. Did you not see it? Wish this was around a couple years ago. I don't know. I couldn't find any information, but I saw it all over TikTok
Starting point is 00:41:09 Apparently it's new law in all 50 states Okay. Well, I'll be I'll be sure to find out what that is. Um Moving on from that. Oh actually I didn't even give an answer on this lady You know what, I would just unfortunately have cut the switch out. Yeah. I mean, it's just not, it's hard because you love someone and you want them to be in your life. But at the same time, it's like, if you have to give these ultimatums, it's just never going to work. You can't force someone to see something that you see.
Starting point is 00:41:43 Separately from that, number one, I need to know, are we ever getting married again? Or are we just like, moving on from that? No, I want to be a wife one day. Like I want to have, I want to be a wife. I want to do that whole thing. And I don't know. Okay, tell me what a wife is to you. A life partner. There have been times, contrary to popular belief that I'd never been single until let the sheets get cold. Yes, I read y'all's comments. There were significant periods of time in my life where I was not, I didn't, wasn't
Starting point is 00:42:20 with anyone. And it was just like, I want to share these things with somebody. I want to share these experiences with somebody. I want to share these experiences, the hard times, you know, raising my kids even if they're not my partner's children. Like I still want to share a life with someone. Do you ever miss being married, not to the person you were married to, but just miss the aspects of marriage that you once had. So I'm gonna use Elijah as an example for this because I think my marriage with Javi is too far gone. I felt like I was married to Elijah and I, yeah,
Starting point is 00:42:59 like I just, like, and I don't know, now hear me out, because I also feel like there, it was a different sort of closeness. Like it was, I don't want to say codependence because I don't think that's what it was. But in some ways, like him and I just got each other the way that my other relationships never, we never were like that. So if it's not like that, I don't want it at all. It's kind of like you get so used to someone's habits and the things that they do and like
Starting point is 00:43:30 you bring to the table collectively that once that's gone, it's really hard to like see past that. Yeah. Do you? I know we've talked we've talked about this a lot on this podcast, but like, do you see yourself getting married again? There was a very long period of time that I said I will never do it again. I'm still, I still would not get government married again.
Starting point is 00:43:53 Like, but you would do it like a ceremony and commit yourself to someone. Yeah, 100%. I think that's completely fair. You know, I feel like we just don't need to be involved in the government and our relationships. I asked that because I had seen an article on People magazine and we've talked about weddings a lot on here before. But it says entitled bride tells wedding photographer to bring a gift to reception, preferably cash. bring a gift to reception, preferably cash. That's weird. What do you think about that? He's a vendor. He's like, he's providing a service. Why would he bring a gift?
Starting point is 00:44:32 Okay, so in a quote from this photographer, they say, what would you do if a client that booked you for their wedding texted you two days before the wedding to tell you not to forget to bring a wedding gift to the reception such as money in a card or an Amazon gift card. How do you feel about that, Lindsay? First of all, I just think it's rude to send anything regarding a gift, like even if it was to a regular wedding guest. I agree.
Starting point is 00:45:02 Like I think that's a very rude thing. I think that there's a tasteful way to send out information like, hey, here's like our wishlist, here's our registry. If someone chooses to buy something off of it, they choose to do that. If they don't, then they don't. But to send a text message to someone about that just in general, I think is rude. I think because when I got married, people, I mean, we had 140, 150 people at our wedding, and then got $500 worth of stuff and gift cards, and that was it. We were really young, but I say that to say that people don't know wedding etiquette. And I think if you're getting married with the hopes that you're going to receive monetary gifts to, like you're expecting a certain number of monetary gifts and things like that,
Starting point is 00:45:55 I think that you're getting married for the wrong reasons. And I just don't think you should have a wedding if you're counting on that. I think it's fair to say if you're being invited to a wedding, I think proper etiquette is probably to bring what your plate would cost. Yeah, that's what I was always taught. I've always read like you just like imagine what you would charge. But I mean, think about it. When I got married back in 2012, 13, something like that, I paid $150 a plate.
Starting point is 00:46:26 Most people are assuming that they are $50 a plate. And that was expensive back then. So I would imagine the same exact location is probably way more expensive than that now. No, for sure. I would be appalled if I was a photographer doing a job, have a contract with this person, like probably don't know this person from Adam, they just like my pictures and they asked for a wedding gift. I would ask them or are they out of their fucking mind and I would cancel the contract.
Starting point is 00:46:57 Well, because at that point it's like you're just exchanging services. Like here you can actually know it's not. So it's going to say, oh oh like tag me in your wedding pictures and then I get free pictures so you're getting promote like do you know what I mean? Like I could see if it was an exchange like that. But at the point that you're paying the photographer for said service and then the the photographer is going to turn around and build you you just break even at that point.
Starting point is 00:47:22 So no, absolutely the fuck not. Well, I mean, at that point now it feels like a favor. Yeah, would you ask your DJ to bring a gift? Like that just feels weird. It's giving, I would never do this. Yeah, it's giving tacky. All right, do you guys love your sunglasses, but you find them getting caught in your hair
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Starting point is 00:50:04 drop off letters and packages. Let stamps.com do what they do best so that you can do what you do better. Go to stamps.com and use code coffee to sign up for a special offer. No contract cancel at any time. That's stamps.com code coffee. Okay, something else that I saw and I was waiting, I was actually going to send this to you over text, but I was like, no, going to talk about this with her own coffee combos. It was on parents.com and it says, divorce dad gets his son therapy without telling mom, did he overstep? Ooh, I really need to hear the feedback for this one because what are your thoughts? So I'm going to set the scene of this situation. The dad says after observing signs of depression
Starting point is 00:50:52 in his 16-year-old son and recognizing the symptoms from his own experience with mental illness, the dad decided to arrange for his son's therapy against his ex-wife's wishes. He claims the mom repeatedly dismissed their son's mental health struggles and refused to acknowledge his sexual orientation. Once found out the mom was livid and accused him of trying to project his demons on the son and undermining her role as a parent. Well, she needs to let go of her feelings because she's not seeing the bigger picture. If you're co-parenting with somebody like that, my thought is that no, he did not overstep. He did what was in the best interest of his son.
Starting point is 00:51:32 It sounds like letting the mom know would have been a nightmare regardless. Whether she found out firsthand or whether she did it, it sounds like she's dismissive of the son anyway. Some people, I believe, just don't believe in the process of therapy. Because those are the same people that think that you go and you talk about what you're feeling and you leave when that's not what talk therapy is so much more than that. You have to be willing to acknowledge your own faults and accept possible solutions and how to tackle the problem outside so that when you're going through something in real life, you're how to tackle the problem outside so that when
Starting point is 00:52:05 you're going through something in real life, you're able to apply these same tools that you're running in therapy, but people think that they just go talk and leave. I would love to know what's written in your custody order. Obviously, these people not together. So there's got to be some type of custody order. In mine, therapy falls under medical and I have a hundred percent control of medical so I could never be told no in a situation like that. I say all of that to say if you do not have a strong custody order with things like that identified, it might not be relevant to you right at the moment when you're doing a custody order with things like that identified. Might not be relevant to you right at the moment
Starting point is 00:52:47 when you're doing a custody order, but later in life, like now this is a 16 year old kid. I think that those things are super important. You eliminate all of the fight. So in Delaware, they won't do what you guys have. If you have joint legal custody, you have joint legal custody. you have joint legal custody, you can't divide what those responsibilities look like because I asked.
Starting point is 00:53:10 That's so crazy that it varies like that from state to state. It's frustrating because when I'm asking for something as spelled out as what you have to avoid anything that's ambiguous or vague or anything like that. I was like, I need something like this and don't care. They don't care. Like my attorney just filed something just to have a portion of the order clarified because anybody can interpret it any kind of way. I know somebody who's going through something and the custody order is basically set up with the intent to harm the other parent.
Starting point is 00:53:48 What the fuck? Yeah. Um, and I'm like, yeah, that absolutely would not work for me. So has there ever been a time where you and will followed very specific parts of the custody order but then very deliberately ignored other parts of the custody order, but then very deliberately ignored other parts of it. Well, I would say the golf cart incident was a deliberate ignorance on Will's part to contact me in an emergency.
Starting point is 00:54:16 I would say there's been times, well, in fact, following the golf cart incident, once I got Jackson back in my custody, I very deliberately ignored the custody order for returning him also. That was the day that I told him to call the police and he has my address. And did he? No, but he threatened me that he did. And he was like, oh, they're on their way. And I'm like, well, better get here in the next five minutes because I got shit to do. Oh, I remember that.
Starting point is 00:54:42 I do remember that. I guess I more so mean like, say the custody order says you're supposed to meet at this location, but then you guys meet at a different location. Or you follow the exact time of drop off, but not the location of drop off. Will and I don't follow shit at this point out of our custody order. So I don't know. That's me and Joe.
Starting point is 00:55:02 You know, it's just like, I mean, I think it worked early on to have all of that in writing and will be great in the event that shit turns sideways. It's just not necessary. And I actually sent somebody a text message last night and I said, if I had to go off of court order to raise my child and couldn't see anything outside of a court order, that to me is not very human-like and long-term will not work
Starting point is 00:55:34 and also will long-term have negative effect. Okay, so this article says, it depends on custody and state laws. If a parent has sole legal custody, they are typically within their rights to make mental health decisions independently. And that was coming from an attorney and marriage and family therapist. She also says, however, failing to disclose such care to the non-custodial parent may still cause relationship strain, mistrust, especially if the child shares that
Starting point is 00:56:06 information later. And I would love to know if you had a child that was in this situation and you're making this decision for the best interest of your child, would you immediately disclose that information to your counterpart. It's hard to say because I look at my own situations and I'm saying situations because they're all different. If you have a highly, highly, highly problematic co-parent to the point that you can't tell them certain things like that, or you feel like you,
Starting point is 00:56:41 there's already a mistrust before this, I don't know how you go about that. I just think it's so sad that people find themselves in custody situations if we're just talking about therapy alone, right? If one of the parents feels that it is in the best interest of the child to do that, I think that the other parent should not have a say in that situation. They either
Starting point is 00:57:06 choose to join along in that journey or they choose to separate themselves altogether from that. But never would I ever if Will came to me and said, Hey, I want to put Jackson with this therapist because these are things that I'm seeing at my house. I would love to know if you're seeing those things at your house. Do you care about this? Okay, yes, obviously I care. Yes, obviously I will go with you. Yes, obviously I will support your decision in doing that. Stepping up to the table and making the right decision for our child. I would never be like, oh, I'm going to file something against you because you put our kid in therapy. But I'm sure there are people out there that would
Starting point is 00:57:51 do it. Yeah. Because they would feel like, Oh, it's parental alienation. You did this without telling me or you did that without explaining it to me. But it's like, I wasn't really thinking about you. I was thinking about the best interest of the child. Sorry that you were the afterthought. Oh, my God. Okay, we have one more listener topic. This person says Hey, kitty gang, gang gang. I need your opinions. I found out a cousin of mine that I haven't talked to in a few years is expecting. It's been weighing on me that I haven't reached out to congratulate her a little backstory. We were best friends
Starting point is 00:58:28 growing up and had a falling out. She stopped talking to me. If we see each other at events, we will be mutual mutual but otherwise do not talk. I haven't wanted to reach out otherwise. But I feel like I want her to know that I'm happy for her. What would y'all do leave it alone? Or reach out? I personally would reach out. Yeah, reach out. I mean, obviously, it's, it's, you could get your feelings hurt, but at least you could say that you reached out and if she doesn't, if she doesn't respond, then,
Starting point is 00:58:59 then you can move on. I think it's also how you approach situations in situations like this. So I would be the type that would preface the message with, hey, while I understand that we had a falling out, I would just like to congratulate you. You've been on my heart. Please let me know if you ever want to talk or need anything. I'm here for you.
Starting point is 00:59:23 Yeah. Like put the ball in her court. Yeah. Yeah. And on that note, we have foul play. I actually never in my life thought I'd be submitting a foul play. But here the fuck I am. I was recently on antibiotics for a sinus infection. And it really messed with my gut. Several weeks of diarrhea ensued. I am a middle school teacher. And two weeks ago, I went to the bathroom at the end of my break right before my next class was coming in. This was in the midst of the diarrhea era so of course I had to shit.
Starting point is 00:59:52 I did my business, got myself cleaned up and went to wash my hands. As I was opening the door to leave the bathroom I thought I still smelled shit but I assumed it was just the residual smell lingering in the bathroom. Oh no! Anyway, I walked back through the hallway. No students were in the hall yet, thankfully. And I sat on a desk right outside my room to greet my students as they walked to my classroom door.
Starting point is 01:00:16 As I'm sitting there, I realize I can still smell shit, but can't figure out where it's coming from. A male coworker comes by and starts casually making small talk and I subconsciously hopped off the desk and brushed off the back of my pants with my hand. As soon as my hand touched my pants, I immediately panicked because I knew where the shit smell was coming from. I somehow had gotten shit on the back of my pants.
Starting point is 01:00:39 Not only was it on my pants, but it was now on my hand and the desk I had been sitting on. Trying not to show my internal panic to my co-worker, I said that I had better get into my class hoping the co-worker would walk away. With shit on my hand, back of my pants, and the desk I was now standing in front of, I waited until he walked away then awkwardly hacked my way into my classroom so that my students wouldn't see the back of my pants. I was able to get my students working on something immediately to keep them occupied for a minute, so I quickly covered myself with the door of the closet that was behind my desk.
Starting point is 01:01:11 By the literal grace of God, I had a pack of baby wipes in my closet. I was able to wipe off both my hands and my pants without anyone seeing. Thank God they were black pants, so there was no stain. I then proceeded... I then pretended like I had to blow my nose so I had an excuse to go out to the shit desk and wipe it down with a Clorox wipe. I shoved all of the wipes into a plastic bag
Starting point is 01:01:32 that I eventually threw out at the end of the day. To my knowledge, no one picked up on my shit incident, but as you can imagine, it was the most internally embarrassing moment of my entire life. And I'm not sure how I would have ever lived it down if my students knew what was going on. I still have no idea how I even managed to get shit on the back of my entire life and I'm not sure how I would have ever lived it down if my students knew what was going on. I still have no idea how I even managed to get shit on the back of my pants to
Starting point is 01:01:49 begin with, but I will never leave the bathroom again without doing a complete once over to make sure my entire body is shit free. Love you guys. I feel like a lot of kids do this where they go to the bathroom and I've always wondered how like the shit gets where it gets. Well, it had to have been on the back of the toilet, right? Like somebody had to have shit there first. Or it was down the front of the toilet. So when she took her pants down and she pulled them back up, if they like hit the front of the toilet bowl, there was probably
Starting point is 01:02:19 something there too. You know what I mean? So you're speculating that it could potentially be someone else's shit from the toilet or it was an explosion? No, I think it was somebody else's like previously already there. You know what I mean? Kristen says and I understand the need for staff only bathrooms. I'm not thinking that it was shit that existed from someone else. I'm personally thinking that it was shit that existed from someone else. I'm personally thinking that it was a diary
Starting point is 01:02:47 Explosion it went places that it shouldn't have gone She didn't know about it or wasn't aware She was probably just busy trying to like clean herself up get back to her class and then all of a sudden She's got a shit rocket on her pants Yeah, I mean, I don't know it to me sounded like there was like shit on the toilet bowl or on the floor or something and then she like rubbed her pants in it basically. Can you imagine having the diarrhea shits? Being a teacher, having to go back into a classroom with a bunch of kids? Do you guys remember and I say you guys like any of these people can answer me but do you remember when I went on Metformin for my PCOS? Yes. I
Starting point is 01:03:28 remember and I will never forget when I had to call hobby about Lincoln's flag football game and I called him and I was like, hey, is there a porta potty where he's playing because if there's not one directly next to it, I cannot come. Imagine being a teacher. Did hobby know why? I think I told him I was on new meds or something at that time. That was horrible. That was a horrible time. And I cannot imagine being a teacher and having diarrhea. Okay, so I know that you're like super upfront and honest with your kids about just like all the things like you've shit
Starting point is 01:04:04 in the car, or you've like, done all these things and your kids are aware. Do you know that I was married for 10 years and never did I ever fart in front of Will or take a shit in like a general vicinity that he would have been in so much so that he still tells Jackson to this day your mom doesn't shit. I also need to know people who are listening to this if you are that type of person like the shit is just unknown like it does not need to be advertised it's like we all know that we all do it but we're like hiding that we do it. No I'm hiding that I shit. My kids know
Starting point is 01:04:47 but my partner will never know. Like I wasn't gonna tell Elijah. You weren't gonna tell him? No. Well Kale he helped you wipe up yourself one time. Multiple times, poor thing. I will never forget that day that you came home. Texted in the group chat and said I shit myself on the way home. And you had to jump in the shower and it was like dripping. It was awful. And then Lux tells everybody about it now. I love that. Y'all coffee convo's podcast is up for nomination in the society and culture category for the people's choice podcast awards voting is open now through July
Starting point is 01:05:22 31. To vote, click the link in the description of the episode or visit our Instagram, Facebook or official Facebook group. We appreciate you. Thank you guys for always supporting our show. Please subscribe and review on the Apple podcast app follow or rate follow and rate on Spotify or listen wherever you get your pods. Full video episodes are now available on kills patreon at www.patreon.com slash kill Laurie. Don't forget to follow us on Instagram and join our Facebook group to connect with us in our community. We hope y'all have a great week and
Starting point is 01:05:54 we'll talk to you soon. See ya. This summer. Pluto TV is exploding with thousands of free movies. Summer of Cinema is here. Feel the explosive action all summer long with movies like Gladiator, Mission Impossible, Beverly Hills Cop, Good Burger, and Transformers Dark of the Moon. Bring the action with you and stream for free from all your favorite devices. Pluto TV. Stream now. Pay never. Hi, I'm Adam Rapon and this is Intrusive Thoughts, the podcast where I finally say the stuff
Starting point is 01:06:36 out loud that's been living rent-free in my head for years. From dumb decisions to awkward moments I probably should have kept to myself nothing's off limits. Yes, I'm talking about the time I lost my phone mid-flight and still haven't truly emotionally recovered from that. There might be too many sound effects. I've been told to chill. Will I? Unclear.
Starting point is 01:06:56 But if you've ever laid awake at night, cringing at something you said five years ago, congratulations, you found your people. Entries of Thoughts with Adam Rippon is available now wherever you get your podcasts. When you want to bet on sports, played on a field or ice or courts, Bet Rivers is the place. Over, under, money, lines, same game, polys, it's all fine.
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