Girls Gotta Eat - The Snack: Ashley Got Engaged!

Episode Date: September 5, 2024

Welcome back to The Snack – a lighter serving of Girls Gotta Eat. This week, we're sharing the whole story of Ashley becoming a feyoncé and answering our listeners' burning questions: Did she know? When did Rayna know? What's the story behind the ring? How was the engagement sex? Where is the newly engaged couple going to live? …and more! Hope you enjoy! Follow us on Instagram @girlsgottaeatpodcast, Ashley @ashhess, and Rayna @rayna.greenberg. Visit girlsgottaeat.com for tour dates, merchandise, and more. Thank you to our partners this week: Seed: Get 25% off VS-01 at seed.com/gge with code 25GGE. Rocket Money: Cancel your unwanted subscriptions at rocketmoney.com/gge. The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives: Watch the Hulu original series, The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, all episodes now streaming on Hulu. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to The Snack, a lighter serving of Girls Got to Eat. This is a Dear Media production. Enjoy. Hi, guys. You're engaged. I'm engaged. They said it couldn't be done. She did it.

It really happened. What, like it's hard? And we're recording on Beyonce's birthday. Oh, my God. How do you feel? Do you feel like a different person? Yeah, kind of. No, I don't know.

We'll get to it. I don't know how to describe it. I'd feel like the same, but it's so different. I'm just kidding. But no, we have so much to talk about. We have an update on my eye. I'm engaged now. The third character in this engagement.

We're here in New York recording this. Anna's with us. Anna's with us. And Remi's with us. If you guys listened to our episode with, it was with Serena Kerrigan. Remy was the main character of that. And some people in the comments, we're shipping.

Oh, Remy, what do you think? Love comments. Okay. Well, I love you too. Well, Remy, Rain has to get engaged in one year. Are you interested? Are you interested in proposing to me? No, I get 14 months.

You did it in 14 months. Okay. 15 months? I'm just saying, I want to... I don't want to give myself a 12-month timeline. That's not fair. Okay, all right, 14, 15. All right, well, we're on it.

Okay, well, let's just thank our sponsors and then, like, let's get into it, because I know you guys are, like, chomping at the bed as I am I. Thanks to Rocket Money. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions at RocketMoney.com slash GGE. And watch the Hulu original series, The Secret Lives of Warming Wives, all episodes now streaming on Hulu. And thanks to Seed, get 25% off at VS.01 at seed.com slash gge with code 25GGE.

So I have to tell all of you guys, I didn't know when we were going to record this because we pre-recorded the episode for Monday. And Ashley literally, I suggested not doing that. And Ashley said to me, what's going to happen between now and then? Probably nothing. And I was like, damn it. Well, we couldn't really do it. I don't know. I don't know when we would have done it. So I wasn't even supposed to come to New York and I was going to stay in Delaware. And today that the episode drops Thursday, I'm heading to Ohio to officiate my cousin's wedding. And then I'm going to be there for a couple days and then going to Boston, whatever. So in the interim between being in Dewey and being in Ohio, I was just going to stay in Delaware with my family. And we were going to do this episode virtually. And I was like, we can't do that. I felt really sad about it. So Raina, she knew how to get me to New York. the weather. She checked the weather and she was like, it's going to be 75 and sunny and clear. And I was like, okay, I guess I'll come.

I'm taking trips without you. Yes. So now you're here. I'm here. We're just going to do this in person. And it's going to just be all about the engagement. I don't know. Uncomfortable.

I don't need to make this like all about me. But it's like what people like said I have to people. I was bullied into it. I said you have to. Yeah. But I crowdsource and Instagram was like, what do you questions do you guys have about the engagement or pop culture? And they were like, fuck you for even mentioning pop culture.

This is our pop culture. We need everything. Spare no details. You know. Go hard. Where do you want to start? Okay. Also, you guys.

have just been like so excited about it. Yeah. So thank you. Number one question that made me laugh. Okay. That people wrote when I crowdsourced. Did Raina know? Is Raina okay? No, not is Rayna okay. I mean, everybody should, whatever. I'm insulted by the sentiment. Yes, Raina is super happy. Right. It's great. We're gonna speak for herself. Okay. So did I know? That's a crazy question. Did Raina know? Who do you think planned this? What? I'm just kidding. Yeah. And how long did Raina know and how much Raina was involved?

And so I'll kick it to Raina from the beginning of ever. I don't know. I don't know exactly. Did you find out? I mean, I've known always. I mean, he also designed the ring with a friend of ours. So, like, I've known since then. I mean, I've known since like February.

I've been knowing. And you, I mean, it's not that you knew this was going to happen. But, like, I think you've always wanted to get engaged in Dewey and hoped it would be then. And so. obviously like him and I together were like, this is when to do it. This is when everybody's going to be there. This is like when everybody's naturally going to be down there. And it's been really nice, I will say, like, I don't think that you, the general you,

spend a lot of time talking to your friend's partners one on one. Ew, I would like never. Like if he ever like sent me like a solo text, I'd be like, gross, we're doing it. So I don't think that like in the general sense you get to spend a lot of one-on-one time talking to your friends' partners. And I've enjoyed like getting to know him a little bit more through this. Because like, otherwise, why would we ever text to each other like a solo? low text. Yeah. So I've known the whole time and like, I mean, that's a really long time. Yeah.

Like it's, I don't know. It's, that's, that's rough to do to somebody. I've been in hell, Ashley. Because I see you every minute of every day. So I keep him on mute. Yeah, I was hearing about all the muted group chats. All of it. And then during the weekend, people were missing important texts because they'd muted. So he, my fiancee spelled like Beyonce, um, he missed a text from a, a freak, our photographer, because he had a muted. You know, like there was just, it was everybody had to unmute. I had to mute everybody because so anyways, the whole thing was, of course, his idea, but, you know, I wanted to pitch in and try to make things special. So I, like, contacted you people and also, like, coordinated with all your girlfriends, our girlfriends,

but more your friends, uh, to make sure that, like, everybody knew, like, this is a, get child care, be there, come down, make sure that, like, you know, you make it a priority to be there at this time, whatever. So I did all that with him and your family and everybody So I just made sure that all the T's were crossed me, the eyes were dotted. I just like, I'll do it for you, but it will be really hard. Like, it's just, I really am so appreciative of you. That's a really long time. So know that.

Like, my best friend Corey's husband, Ham, I mean, quick engagement. Like, they met and started dating in January of 2015. And he, we were recapping this this past weekend. He told me in May, I didn't even have his phone number. me on Facebook and be like, hey, can we talk in May that he wanted to propose? I was like, this is crazy. They've been dating like four months, you know, and then proposed in October. And so that was a long time for me to know. But I don't see her all the fucking time, you know. So I don't know. I just think that's a lot to keep and just to be coordinating with everybody.

And so I just could not like appreciate you more. I think there was like little things that Raina just maybe vetoed or changed or made sure was absolutely perfect. And everybody should have a friend like that. Oh, thanks. Well, it was really fun for me. And yeah, I waited until the last minute to tell people because I didn't want to, I don't want it out there for too long. Like, I just, I needed to be on a group text with Laura, Corey, and later make sure

that Corey absolutely came. The Laura kicked people out of her pool party at 4 p.m. on Saturday. So I want to make sure you had time to take a shower and look nice before the next event. Yeah. So everybody just really pitched in. But I also didn't, I didn't tell anybody because you were like, you asked me and you're like, does that blah, blah, blah. And I was like, no, I didn't want to steal your thunder.

So like, we had hung out with so many people that are close friends of ours that I also did not tell. Yeah. So that was, that is actually what killed me more. I didn't tell Tessa. Yeah. And I just like wanted you to have your moment to tell people. Right. So that was actually much harder than not telling you.

Taylor got to know because she had some ring input. I want to do an update on my eye because everyone was like what happened with your eye. So last week on the snack, I said that I was diagnosed with blephoritis, which was wrong. and I diagnosed myself the next day, and I was right, and that is not the first time this year. I've diagnosed myself and a doctor has been wrong. What is going on with these doctors? No, I'm kidding. I'm sure they're great.

But it keeps happening. But you're better. It keeps happening that I'm telling a doctor what's wrong with me. And then they're like, oh, that seems about right. So this happened with a dermatologist, and it's just been kind of crazy. So I just didn't feel like that was correct that was what it was. There's some, like, symptoms of blephritis that I just didn't have. And it started to look more like a sty.

And so I realized, I started doing research and I was like, I think it is what's called a Shalazion. All this sounds made out. Chalazion. Shalazion. C-H-A-L-A-Z-I-O-N. Shalazion. Can you believe there's just all these words out there in the world that you've never heard of until it happens to you?

So I'm like, I think this is what's going on. I put something on Instagram. People were like saying that word. And then I sent photos to my brother. He checked with this really renowned eye doctor, he knows. And he was like, it's a Shalazian. And so I was like, here I am again. I'm the doctor.

I'm the doctor here. Fuck that little kid that told me it was this other thing. But it was pretty bad. It got a lot worse. And the day that we flew to Philly to go to Delaware, it was like at an all time high. Like it was so big. My eye was shutting. It was like swollen shut.

I was using the hot towel on the plane as a hot compress. So everybody's texting me on the way to the airport. So on Wednesday you, I'd seen you on Wednesday. it looked red and puffy, but I was like, it is going to go down. It's fine. And everybody, as I was going to the airport, your fiance, and our big group of girlfriends were like, is she okay? And I was like, yeah, Ashley, like, gets worked up about medical stuff. And then she's fine. And she'll handle this. She's totally fine. I got to the airport. I was like, things are not fine. No, you think you have a sty. It's like a sty pro max. Like the Shalazion is like the D1 athlete

of Styes. It's such a hot mess. And I was like, this is crazy. It looked like it was filled of fluid, like against your nose. Like, it went all the way down the crease of your eye. It looked like when I got my nose done. That's how puffy that I was. My smile looked off. Like, everything was fucked. And so I was just like, I just kept doing like hot conferences and I was in touch with

the doctor. And I got, people were giving recommendations. And Brittany, who recently had a Shalazian was helping me out. And I got it down in time to even, like, put a contact in and a little bit of mascara on by the day. Maybe you can still see it. I mean, it still looks red. It was just, I mean, it was something.

Well, okay, here's what I thought was good about it. Not that. But I freak is a great photographer and I was like, we're going to have to edit this. And then it was at sundown when, you'll tell the story later, but it was at sundown when he did it. So I knew you'd be wearing sunglasses. Yes. And I was like, this will be great for the story.

Yeah. Like, what if she just had no problems and nothing funny happened? Like, no, I've already started writing jokes about it. I know. I'm so like, Shalazian. That sounds like where I'm getting married. That's like we're going to do the ceremony in the beach. And then we're going to have the reception that there's Shalazion.

Oh, it sounds like a town in like the south of Italy. Yes. Well, my fiance said it sounds like a Pokemon, which is also pretty accurate. We're not having kids, but if we did, obviously our firstborn, Shalazion. And the second one would be named Blufferettos. Shaws and Bluff. Ashley and I don't believe in only children. So, Bluffy.

So I was like, this will, I was excited for the comedy aspects of it. Yeah. But I wanted to give a health update on that. It looks great now. So the main question everybody asked and asked me and obviously you is did you know this is happening. So like were you like on the plane in Philly? Like, do I just ask Raina like straight up?

Is this happening? You would have gotten nothing out of me. I'm amazing. But you are. You're the best one. I kept hearing people throughout the weekend just drop lines and I was like, she fucking knows because of you. Something happened right before it went down and the way you, it was buck.

And the way you looked at him, you had daggers in your eyes. Like he'd been waiting for hours. I was like, I hate you. Yeah. They had told me they had just left the house to get down there. And he was like, we've been here since three. And Raina looked at him. I mean, I thought you were going to kill him.

So, listen, I mean, I know that he wanted to surprise me so much. And of course, I was surprised. But I did have a feeling just because it's like what I wanted. Like, I was talking to Andrew Collin about engagements. and he was like, I think that couples who know they're going to get married when it's the appropriate time, they've been talking about it, and they are really in sync, like, always kind of know. And that might not be everybody's story. I know people have been completely surprised and blindsided and it's so special and wonderful.

But yeah, I mean, it's a credit to him that he knew exactly what I wanted. That's my dream. And I know that that's the only time we would be there in Dewey before the end of the year. I knew he wanted to propose to me this year. He said things about the ring and he was always like grabbing my finger and he, we've been talking about this. So this wasn't like a surprise. And I had said either I'm sure I had told him or told Rainer or whoever.

I think anybody close to me knows that I would want to get engaged in Dewey with all my friends and family around or I'd want to get engaged at a show. I have never thought that I would want that in like just us private in some destination. I know it's a lot of people's dream to get engaged in Laco or wherever. You know, like some people were like, I thought it was going to happen in Banff. And I wouldn't have wanted that. I want to be like, it's such an exciting thing. You have like adrenaline and you want to be around your people for me.

For me. I'm sure people want like private, private and celebrate in private. But I'm like, I don't want to call anybody. I want them all to be there. It just that was my absolute dream. The backdrop of Dewey the Bay during sunset is, my dream. I'm not saying I've been dreaming about this my whole life. I've been going back and forth and even getting married in the first place. But when I do think about it, we all think about it,

most of us. That was what I wanted. He knew that. Yeah, I had a feeling. And then I'm just, you and I, I mean, I've said this all the time. I was like, should be an FBI aided. I don't miss anything. Like little things that feel not even crazy or weird, but just a little out of the ordinary were kind of tipping me off throughout the day. Like, nobody did anything. We would joke about the thing that Buck said. But that was a moment's before it even happened. And then I walked into the lighthouse in Dewey and we'll kind of walk you guys through what happened. And it felt like an engagement party. I mean, it felt like all my friends and family and the excitement was like so palpable.

And then, you know, he was like, let's go out to the pier or the dock and get a photo. And I was like, oh, my God. And then I just started to like feel really shaky. Well, we didn't speak the whole way over. I feel like we're walking the plank. It was crazy. It was crazy. But so if you guys are newer listeners, Ashley and I take this trip to Dewey every summer.

This is like my eighth summer doing it. This is like her 20th summer. She goes every summer. And her whole family is always there. And like your oldest best friend, Corey mostly comes down. And Lee and Laura, your other good friends. Like it's the weekend everybody's there. So like that's what I would want.

It's like everybody's already conveniently down there. Yeah. Why would I not want to do it that weekend? And a lot of people asked how long have you been talking, you know, did you talk about marriage, engagement? I mean, yeah. When he proposed, he again, I blacked out. But he said some things along the lines of like,

I knew I've wanted to marry you since I met you, you know. And I just think we knew really early on, like we were each other's person, not immediately, but pretty early on. And we had a conversation last year, like when we made it official when we were in Cabo for my 40th birthday. And we were, like, laying on this boat. And I mean, again, we had already been dating. He was there with meeting all my friends was on my birthday trip. But that was when we made it like official. And when we had that conversation, we talked about kids. And, you know, we'd already kind of mentioned, he knew I didn't want kids. I was like, I just want to be sure this is. something that you really feel like you don't want because I'm just it's not I'm not going to want

children and I just if you change your mind you have to tell me and it was a pretty heavy conversation to have with like a new partner and then he was like that's I've talked about this in podcast but in case you guys are new around here you didn't you don't remember it or didn't hear it and he was like that's I don't want kids and I but marriage is important to me and I would want to get married and I know you've said you're not really into it or you don't know if you want to get married or you don't really see the purpose of it but like it is important to me and I was like I would get married. And I think at that moment, I was like, I think I'm going to marry him. Like, I just, I don't know why we wouldn't. It just felt like the right person. And of course, who's to say,

but I think, I just kind of knew. I think he, I don't know. I just knew he was the person. And we went to Dewey a few weeks after that. And that was the first, or the next weekend, actually. And that was the first time we said, I love you. And he said, like, something really clicked for him on that trip. And maybe he knew then that's where he would propose. We had the conversation about marriage. and me getting married in the first place last year. And then we started talking about the actual wedding details randomly, kind of like end of the year. Like I think we both just knew we were going to end up together.

And so like around New Year's, it was just one of those weekends where we were watching some show, it came up. We talked about where we would want to do it. And maybe at that time, I said, like, I would be okay not getting married in Dewey. It's kind of hard to get to. and, you know, it's just, but I feel like that's where I'd want to get engaged. I don't remember exactly. But people just keep asking, like, how long have you talked about this?

How long have you known? I was like, we've just kind of known. I mean, he says stuff all the time. I can't wait to marry you. I mean, it just was like one of those things that we both knew was happening, I guess. So it wasn't such a surprise. Like, I did know we were going to get engaged this year. I think we both knew that.

I don't, I think as you get older, it becomes less of a surprise. Yeah. I think that, like, you get older. you're just, you know yourself, your partner knows themselves, and you're just like, this is the person I'm going to be with. Obviously, we're going to get married. Like, it becomes less of a just like, oh my God, I can't believe it. Like most people our age have helped help to pick out the ring, have helped, like, figure out what they want, when they want to get married. It just, it feels like a more not adult conversation. You're certainly an adult when you're like 25, but like, even when I was getting engaged, I was like a kid, I was 28, no offense. My mind was like, how many times am I going to bring this up? And at which point? Bring it up on one. When I was 28, I got engaged. And even I knew, like, we had talked about it.

We're going to get married at this point. And, like, I started sending him photos of rings I liked. I mean, you just kind of know. Yeah. I think it's fun to be completely surprised by anything. Yeah. I just think I'm a hard person to do that for. And I think this relationship was like, we know we're going to get engaged.

Also, I feel like it would have been weird to propose on the, I was thinking, like, does he want to propose on the tour? But I think it would have been, like, a little disappointing to be in that Dewey Trip of not get engaged. Like if everybody was there, all of our friends, and like, you were like, oh, you didn't, decided to do this now? Well, I was not trying to think like that. I think that's like, I think that was the time to do what it was saying. Like, like, to wait until what we're in Vegas in a couple of weeks? Yeah. I was just like, this is the time to do it. Yeah. Or, I mean, I thought it would be like at the end of the year. Like when you could get my family maybe to come to Boston,

something like that. I mean, obviously my family being there was going to be really important. But So that answers the question. I had a feeling and he still did an amazing job. And, you know, I think he so badly wanted to be this amazing surprise. But it's like, well, we know we know each other so well. You know this is what I wanted. You like, you just made my dream come true, which is more important than like throwing me off. That's also a nice way to reframe it.

Yeah. You listened to me. Yeah. This is everything I've ever wanted. Yeah. You know, it wouldn't have been somewhere else where you would have, yes, surprise me more, but this was like the most important thing. And yeah, everybody to ask about the ring.

I decided I wanted this. I didn't send it to him. I showed you. It's a ruby. It's not a red diamond. Someone said, Ashley, I looked up red diamonds and they're so expensive and so rare. So maybe I'm going to go with that. It's a red diamond. It's a ruby. That's my birth stone. I didn't want something traditional. Got this hidden halo and I love it. It's what I wanted. And he got me what I wanted. And our friend, Anushka, who is a jewelry designer who's done other stuff for me. did the ring and that was nice for them to collaborate on them together and that's kind of the story behind it that was like the bulk of the questions everybody had wanted to know because it like is different it's and it's not pink people there was like photo where it like looked pink and it's people thought I had like a hot pink ring so sorry to disappoint anybody that thought I had like a hot pink

ring all right so I think we should like the whole story of him like proposing but um we'll just think a couple of our partners we'll go back into it okay so I'm gonna tell you guys about Seed because Raina is not able to get. She is not able to get through these. So we love seed and it really is something that a lot of women can benefit from. In case you guys didn't know, nine out of ten women have an unstable vaginal microbiome. So that is why seed came to the rescue and created VS.O.1 vaginal symbiotic to restore a healthy vaginal microbiome and sustain regulated pH levels.

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Stop wasting money on things you don't use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to rocketmoney.com slash gge. That's rocketmoney.com slash gge. Rocket money. com slash gge. Okay. So again, we were on this vacation.

We had this really wonderful time with my parents and we were staying this beach house in Dewey. And I just want to tie two things in. One of my favorite moments of the weekend was we had like all been to this dinner. Oh, damn. And this is at the sushi restaurant called Culture Pearl. we love and we get back. It was just like a funny night. We were like laughing, having such a good time. And we get back to the house. And I don't know what did my dad pour himself some Hennessy?

Yeah. He poured himself some Hennessy. And Raina goes, Lee, you're such a sexy daddy. And it happened in slow, this is my dad. It happened in slow motion because I heard her say sexy. And I was like, what is the next word going to be? It can't be worse than sexy. It can't be worse than sexy. And then it was daddy. And the way the record screeched, we were all like, what just happened? My mom's in the room. Then they sat down on the couch next to each other. And my dad put pillows between them.

He was like, Rayna, I'm keeping my distance. I was like, is this happening? And I have to tell you that I woke up the next morning, the day of my engagement. No, I woke up the next morning the day of your engagement. I was like, maybe nobody will remember. Maybe nobody heard me. As it was coming out of my mouth, even I was like, how was this happening? I was looking down at myself going, stop it.

Stop these words. And I just said it. And the next morning, I was like, maybe nobody remembered. Maybe nobody knows. So, yes, I woke up and I rolled over and I was like, babe, remember last night when Raina's called my dad a sexy daddy? Daddy. Did you even know what it was happening? No, I didn't know what was happening.

I don't know how daddy came out of my mouth. I told him either. I just, I was like, look at this. made, just poured himself a head of seats. And I just, in front of your mom, like, I wish I could be like, I was so drunk, you guys, I didn't know what I was doing. No, I wasn't. I had, like, one drink.

I was not that drunk. That was crazy. I know. You weren't even that drunk. And the next morning, you were like, talking about this on the podcast. I was like, oh, my God. I can't. I'm never embarrassed.

I'm so rich. But like, it's just like, it's your family. It's your dad. Your mom was there. Louisa was there. Everybody looked at me like, are you okay? Listen, Raina and my dad flirt. And it's not weird because they're not related.

and Raina is age appropriate and it's fine. My dad talks about a hot jar and he just farts. Yeah, I flirt with your dad too. But then he really gives me the ick when he's farting all over the place. No, I'm just kidding. Bill, I love you. And you're listening. So I bring up my dad because people ask if he asked my dad for permission, which is so funny.

I'm 41. Can I have your daughter's hand? I mean, no one's ever been able to tell you what to do. Yeah, my dad's like, she's going to do it. Yeah, just ask her. I have no. Ask her for permission. Can you imagine?

My dad's like, she's never asked me for permission for anything in my life. It sounds like you don't know her at all. No, I'm kidding. I thought it was really sweet and just very traditional. But he asked them back in June. And I had to tell you, like, they, I know that he had some time with my parents solo when we were at my parents farm back in June. And when we were walking out, we were saying goodbye. And my dad says to him, thanks again for the conversation.

And I whip my head around. I go, what conversation? And my dad recovered very quickly. And he was like, what? We were just talking about like his family. And, you know, he recovered. Wow. But what kind of language is that?

Thank you for the conversation. Sparkle eyes immediately texted me. Lee gave it up. Wait, he did? Immediately told me that. Wait, are you serious? Yeah, Lee said him, thanks for the conversation in front of her. He goes, she knows.

And I didn't want to, I just don't want to like burst his little bubble. So I was like, no, she probably didn't notice that. I was like it could go either way. My dad really likes him. Anyway, so he did talk to my dad. and my mom and Matt. I know. It was really sweet.

Like, what did he say to Matt? Just like, I just, I want your blessing? I do. I like the, like, when your dad was retelling us the story that like, Sparkle, I was just like, I want you to know I'm going to take care of her. I'm going to love her. Like, I think that like, with the quote unquote asking for your hand, like, I think it's this respectful thing to like say to somebody's parent.

Like I just hope you know I have like the best of intentions with this person. No, it's really special. And he said that to Matt too. So like that's. Yeah. No, I know. It's not like. Will you allow me to marry this 40-year-old woman?

He asked me permission, though. And Raina. Yeah, he didn't really make the rounds. Okay, so we'll just, like, run through it. I mean, I think we kind of said most of the details, but we all went down on this vacation. Saturday was the best day ever. He and I woke up. We walked and got coffee.

We walked on the beach. And then we went to Laura's house, which is our favorite house, our favorite day of the summer. She cooked everything from scratch. We usually do, like, kind of a catered lunch. She made everything. Everybody was there. Corey was down.

She had, you know, child care for her two, three kids. And her husband, and it was just like, it was so fun. Matt came over. Matt brought Jay over. They swam in the pool. It was just like the best day. It couldn't have been more perfect. We had this incredible lunch.

And the Clemson game was on, even though they lost. Only good weather day of the trip. Yeah, most perfect weather. And that was what we did during the day. And then again, like, Laura was like, okay, everybody out at four. And Matt came over and he was like, hey, we're going to meet at Lighthouse at 5.30. And it's just, listen, the thing is, is I'm always the one kind of coordinating and making sure not Laura's a great planner and so were you but like with my family

and my friends I'm the one kind of like hey we're all going to meet here and do this and Matt's usually like well I got the kids and this and that so for Matt to be like hey we're going to do this and he was super casual about it he didn't do anything wrong but I was like I kind of that's a little out of the ordinary so what I told him to do um was weeks before like because I knew you got I knew you'd given everybody the plan that we were going to go to jam after laura's yes and I was like which is like a live music thing at a bar and I was like tell her mom and Dad just feel like you're ditching them tonight. Like, can we just meet them for a drink before you guys go over to Jam?

Like, I said, blame it on Cindy and Lee. You've got to blame it on them. Yeah. But instead, he made a little too casual. Yeah. And also, Sparkleyes had said, like, I don't know if we want to go. Do we really want to go to Jam? He was kind of saying, like, I don't know if you want to go to Jam.

Because I would have dressed differently. But he was very much on, like, I don't know if we're going to go to jam. And I was like, all right, well, wear this see-through skirt. So Jam, it's live music. Like, you dress in, like, bikini top and jean shorts. I mean, it's like messy, your feet get beer soaked. I mean, the whole thing. I tried to convince him to propose there.

At the jam. What? Like go up on stage? Yeah. Try to convince him to do it. So I was like, Laura was like, there's this band. It'll be really fun. Laura was time with band was there.

And I was like, guys, hear me out. What if I call the band? I like DM them and I get them to let Sparkle Eyes come out on stage and propose. And Laura goes, he's not going to do that. I was like, I'll take care of this. And so I texted him immediately. like absolutely not. And I was like, we guys met on stage. I was like, I'll be with you. And he was like, under no circumstances. All right. Well, you know, that was your one L. That was my dream.

Yeah. Of the planning. So we all go to go to and when I run the tape, like it's just, I don't know. He like, I remember we were getting ready and he was like, do you think our outfits look good together? Which is what we would make. I don't know. There's just little things that were in my head of like, but Ashley like don't psych yourself out and anyway we get there and everybody's there Lindsay and Buck Buck's and Lindsay meanwhile an hour later was like we're gonna head down and then we get there bucks like we've been here since three we had to stake out a good spot people don't listen for what people don't listen to my exact verbiage so and by the way so we're walking into the lighthouse and if you guys it's Dewey Beach it's on the bay like overlooks the

water and the sun sets on the bay we walk into the lighthouse and as I'm walking in five dudes in like Trump gear are like walking out. I'm talking like maga hats deplorables like gear. I would it really was it shook me to see it. I don't like to see it. It was like this is my like hometown. Like this is my spot. You know my whole I just I hate seeing it. What I mean, you know? And so I'm like, what is going on? So I said to my brother, I was like that kind of threw me to see all that Trump stuff in my face like a group of people like in here in this town. You know what I mean? Joe Biden's homeland. You You know what I mean? Like right next to Rojobah. And so and then Matt's like they're all out.

And these, these boats are in the bay. It's like essentially like they were rallying. Like there was the thing that went out. They were like going to meet all these pontoon boats in the bay and like kind of do a Trump rally. So you see these boats, American flags, not a ton of Trump flags, but like one. And guys, please, this is not like what Dewey's like. It's just not. I mean, Delaware, the beaches, it's more liberal. That's why it was like so jarring to me. And so I see them in the bay and I'm like, oh my God. And as we're walking out, I start to feel like, like, so lightheaded and like, I think this is like about to happen. And I'm like, I literally had the thought if there's a Trump flag in these photos. Well, it's funny because your brother, like, knows you so well. So I went down to the lighthouse five minutes before you with your brother.

And Afrike was there. And your brother told Afrike there's all these Trump flags on these boats. Like shoot around them if you can. And I was like, we'll just edit them out. Yeah, you'll just edit them out. But then everybody else is shooting too, you know, whatever. So there weren't any. there was only one with like a true Trump flag that like, you know, had left by the time we got out there.

So anyway, we're in there. We say hi to everybody. We get drinks. And then he Sparkal Eyes was like, do you want to go down to the pier and get a picture? But he was quick with it. Like we'd only be in there five minutes. I hadn't even like had to sip my drink. He was like, do you want to walk down and get a picture?

Like we always do. Not that out of the ordinary. But Raina is following behind. And I'm like, okay. So again, it was like this silent walk where I was like, what's about to happen? Something is feeling a little weird. Well, he was like, how do we get on the dock? And I was like, ask me to take a picture of you guys and I'll come out with you.

But he like didn't really say that in front of you. So the three of us are just walking the plank. Yeah, he was like, let's go to a picture. So we're walking. And he was kind of walking behind me. And I'm like, where is? You know, it's just. And so we get out there and I'm like, it's happening.

And he gets on one knee. And I just completely black out. I mean, it just, again, like, as much as I had a feeling, just, it's still such an amazing, like, surprise. And I was hearing him sort of. He was saying like, I mean, the most beautiful thing. They need to mic these guys up because no one remembers. And so he's saying these things. I'm like, I can't believe this.

I didn't know when to put the ring out. Like it was just so crazy. And so we're hugging and all of that. I'm taking it in. And I like come to out of this blackout and I see a freak who is our photographer who shot our Philly show and our New York show. And we know him and we met him on Hannah Burner's Bachelorette and at her wedding. And he's there.

You got him to come down and shoot it from Philly. And that was like an insane surprise. And so I was like losing my mind. that. And then meanwhile, everyone's cheering all around, probably even the Trump boats. The whole bar erupted. There was like fans. And Buck was telling me that there was like a table of like Girls Got to Eat listeners. And they were like, is that Ashley? Is that Ashley's boyfriend? Wait, is she getting engaged? And people were like watching it. It was like a spectator sport. The whole bar erupted. I blacked out. I was shaking. I didn't know what to do. I told you,

I told him I would film it. I completely forgot. Let's jump in right here. Always hire photographer. You cannot trust your friends and they should not be responsible for this. No one is going to be able to get what they think they can. Like the photos and videos will put some on screen for you guys that my friends were sending me were like a blind person did it. Like Lee has a photo. It's the boardwalk. It's her knee. It's her knee. Yeah. It's nobody and it's shouldn't have to. Like you really want this documented. You hire a photographer. It was just also that nobody was at the right angle. Yeah. Because he, I thought he was going to drop down on the side so that I could see both your silhouettes. And he dropped down with his back to me. And so I was like, oh,

only a freak was on that side to get you guys. And so if he hadn't been, like everybody else's photos is just of Sparklice's back. Yeah. No. I mean, he just, if you want it documented, you cannot trust other people because they won't in the moment they'll forget and they should. It's really special. Raina should have filmed that whole time.

And she was just like not shaking. I was just like so nervous. Because he also, so his pants were fitted. He dresses nice. And so he was like, I can't put this ring in my pants. And he'd give me the ring before and I was like, I'll start taking pictures and then I'll hand you the ring. But as you guys were walking, he started like waving his hand around to try to the ring and I was like, I thought you were going to see me because I wasn't prepared to hand it to him.

My God. So I just blacked out. Yeah, everybody blacked out. And so I go up to the bar, everyone's there. And then his friends had come down, like five of his friends, like his best friend who just got married a couple weeks ago, came with his wife. All these people came from Boston. It was like so special. That was a huge surprise. And I just have to tell you, Raina, one of my favorite comments that I've been like saving for you. There's like, you know, a million comments on the post. It says also Raina would be wearing cowboy boots at a time like this. I really went back and forth on those cowboy boots. I was like, is this too extra?

At a time like this got me. But like, of course she is. I just was like, I, what do I wear to this? Because like, I was like, I don't want to look like I made this about me. And the cowboy boots sort of felt like I made this about me. No, he was perfect. I was trying to look cute. But you, Lee, and Laura, all wore white tank or body.

suit with jean shorts and the reina spiced it up with the cowboy boots but they always dressed the like anyway so they always were in the same outfit not planned they just share brain um and then i mean the only thing anybody really wears in dewy is jean shorts and a body suit so that's the uniform except me i wore see through skirt pussy out i was like her whole vagina are we going to see people like did you know your skirt was see through i was like yeah yeah yeah i mean i know you can see some of the photos you can see my buck crack and i had to kind of edit those a little bit but just where the light was hitting yeah um yeah i know what i was doing yeah i was doing yeah i was He was like, yeah, I don't want to make this too much about me.

But you guys are also, like, so much taller than me. And I knew we're going to take photos. So I needed like a little heel. People asked if Raina was going to officiate the wedding, yes. I gave Matt for his right of refusal. And I told Matt he can take it back. Yeah, I've officiated my brother's wedding. And he was just like, I would be too nervous.

I don't want to do it. And I was like, even if you had a full script, he was like, even with a full script. And so I was like, I don't want you to be nervous. So, you know, deferred to Raina. I'm honored. I'm very excited. And I told him, even if it's five days before, he wants to take it back, he can. And so we did that.

We stayed at Lighthouse a little bit longer and then went to Starbird and had like an impromptu, not impromptu, it was planned. But it felt like an engagement party right on the spot. And Matt had gotten, you know, them to let us use the VIP area on a Saturday night on a holiday weekend. People were like, who gets to do this? Just from 7 to 9. By 8.50, people were like pounding at the doors. The line was two blocks long.

Yeah, the line was around the blog. And like, we're holding down this whole room. And so, you know, they let us. But our friend Kat bartended, and it was just like really special to be able to celebrate there. And just so funny because like Corey got engaged at the starboard and she's there. And it's just like my favorite place. And then, you know, we got some pizza and went home and he drank a little too much. My fiancé drank a little too much.

And he has never, we always say like, Dewey gets you. Doey always wins. And Dewey hasn't won with him yet. He's always made it out alive. He's never had like a go home early, have to like miss a thing. And he, Dewey got him. He doesn't get fucked up like guys. Yeah, he doesn't.

He just has a couple beers steady. But I think he was nervous. He drank all day. I told him, don't drink a lauras. And he, like, he had lunch,

but then I don't think he ate enough. And so he doesn't do anything crazy. He just, like, couldn't hang all night. And he came home. We already came home, whatever. And yeah,

he was passed out, like, face down, clothes on. And so, no, there was no engagement sex that night. And we woke up at like six of the morning. And he woke up and he was like, I'm really sorry.

I'm like, You don't have anything to apologize. You're fine. It's Dewey. I just, I think you had like a really stressful few days. Yeah. Like, I think every single day, he was like, I'm so nervous. I'm so excited.

I mean, I think the amount of adrenaline for days, like, it's a lot to come down from. And he said every guy was telling him like, make sure you eat. Make sure you eat enough. Make sure you eat enough. And he didn't really have a dinner. None of it. Yeah, we didn't. We had some apps.

And so, yes, the engagement sex people asked was 6 a.m. The next morning. It was amazing. It was really wonderful. It helped with the hangover. And I think that leads me into giving tips on how to have sex with your family in the house. Thank you. I've been honestly thinking about it the whole time. So, I mean, you just keep it quieter. The bed didn't make any sound or anything. I think, you know, sometimes you're in an old house or whatever. The bed's going to creak. That's going to be your giveaway. And that was not the case. It was a nice bed, like really nice base around it. And here's my tip. Do it at unsuspecting times. So we had sex at like 4 p.m. like before happy hour blow jobs and all when like we could hear you guys downstairs talking like you're like I'm not going to

let him change his mind on this suck his dick right now like he literally got out of the shower I was like I feel like sucking a dick right now I'm really trying to get that ring this weekend no he I'm telling you like no one expects it at 4 p.m and then people are the house isn't quiet

do it when like the people have there was music on you guys were talking I mean I like heard you and I was like I should not be hearing Raina's voice while we're fucking. But like I, that's my hack. It's like midday, 4 p.m. You know, everyone's showering, getting ready. Like, it's not a dead silent house.

You did it in the bed? I thought you were going to do it like in the bathroom or standing near like a dresser because like those things don't make noise. The bed just didn't make noise. It was really solid. That was made for fucking on a family vacation. But your dad was in the house. He was in the house. And I was like, if I hear his voice is going to take me out of it.

I never heard it. Never heard Matt. Matt hadn't come over yet. Oh, God. And so that's my hack. We had sex like a few times like and I was proud of him because I was worried like your parents are in the house. I was like we're all adults here and I would die if someone heard us.

No one heard. No one heard. Yeah. You know that your mom would have waited until the exact moment when everybody is together to let everybody know. But she heard right of having phone sex. My mom heard right to have a phone sex. Twice.

All my brother's wedding weekend. Yeah, twice. So that's my that's my hack for fucking on a family vacation. Daytime. Everyone's showering, getting ready. No one's paying attention. People are talking, laughing, music's on. That's the whole thing.

You slept under the radar. I was like, is she even going to try to have sex? with him and solidified this ring. Yeah. No, I came down for happy hour, like freshly dick in my mouth. That was my appetizer. Yeah, you really did it. I was wondering when you were going to do it.

I figured the bathroom. I was like, how are we doing this? Well, your dad stayed downstairs with May, not in the same bedroom. I heard my dad were in the outdoor shower. I'm trying to think of some other questions. People asked about where we're going to live. I mean, obviously we're long distance engaged. I mean, the plan is that he's going to move to L.A. for a little bit.

I think we both want to end up back in the East Coast, the three of us. My dad asked me yesterday, how is this going to impact the podcast? And I was like, what? And he was like, like where they decide to live. And I was like, he will decide to live where we decide to live, all three of us. I know, we're in a thruple. Yeah. So that's the plan.

I mean, we'll, I don't want to say anything set in stone. But, you know, I think Rayne and I at least want to be in L.A. for another year. I mean, who knows. But, I mean, our families are on the East Coast. And there's a chance your brother could come back here. and we'll see. So I think that's where long-term we all want to be. Still always looking to buy a house in Delaware, but I think, you know, we want to be together and he can work in L.A. easier than I can work in Boston. The plan has never really been for me to live in Boston. It's no shade. That's just like not where we're going to be,

not where our friends are. And he wants to change and he loves L.A. and yeah, I love L.A. It's the best. Yeah. You know, moving back to New York to uproot all three people would be a lot. Not everybody wants to move to New York in their 30s. It's a hard life. Yeah. So we'll move in our 40s. Yeah. Okay.

So I asked you this question and I'm wondering if people like asked you this. How do you feel about, I know the answer is, but like how do you feel about wedding planning? Were you like minute one like got to look at the dress? Got to look at the venue. I want to pick a date. Like how pressed are you about this? Zero press. We got to get through the tour.

I'm going to throw another event into the mix. I'm planning the tour. Yeah, everybody's different. I think some people are just like, as soon as they get engaged, everybody's like, what do you guys can get married? And I don't think you're in such a rush. I don't even know where I want to get married. Yeah. I always thought it would be Dewey.

I don't. That was enough for me. That was perfect. I think L.A. would be great. I would do something in Boston. Matt was like there's really great venues, like in the northern part of Delaware, Philly. Philly. Yeah.

Yeah. I mean, I want something that feels meaningful to us, but I just want like something that also is good for our guests. I want people to easily be able to get to it and have a nice weekend. I've talked about doing it on my parents' farm. I just think that would be really expensive to bring everything in. And it is a little trickier to get to, too, too. But that's still a thought. I think it's nice to just enjoy it for five minutes.

I think everybody's dreams are different. I think some people have, like, Pinterest boards and mood boards and everything just, like, saved. And they're like, it's go time, baby. I feel a little anxiety around it. It feels like really something I want to not really think about. We have enough on our plate. I don't feel in a rush at all. Good.

That's great. I don't want this long. years-long engagement, of course. I think he's going to move to L.A. and, like, that's the next step, and that's the next thing you plan. And everybody's dream is different. But I think a lot of our friends have gotten engaged

and sort of just been like, I'll get to it when I got to it. Yeah. Yeah. How are you, you want to do it? So that's kind of where I'm at. It felt very, like, out of body. It still feels like, I was like,

am I reacting appropriately? Like, I was like, I feel like, I'm watching this from above. I don't know. I don't know how to describe it. It was a lot of attention. which we're used to, but in a different way. So it's just this, you'll never feel it until the moment you feel it.

Like I was saying to him, like, you're going to black out. It's fine. Like, he was like, I'm not sure what I'm going to say. And I was like, just, you can say to her again later, you know, like you can do it a second time. Also, like, you're just going to black out. It's just going to be nervous. And it's going to feel crazy. Like, how could you ever know what that would feel like?

You know, I just think it's so exciting. It's so fun. Yeah. So just we'll wrap this conversation up. We'll give you guys a couple racks. thank you to everybody. I mean, there's so many comments. At people love love. Like we were saying like, even all the comedian friends in the comments, like, not even anything funny. Just like, so happy. Everyone like loves love. It's pretty crazy.

Rain and I were saying like we could run for president and we'll still never be as many comments and likes as you get from an engagement. People will just love it. I love it. I'm not saying it's just like it's interesting to see and it's really lovely to see. And I think there was like one funny comment, Krista Stefano was like, you did it, bitch. that's all he could even muster as a person I know exactly but there were some funny ones from our listeners and just I just want to thank everybody who like put this on their story or commented or even whatever just set me a message like that's like I've been here since the beginning or not however long you've been here but really the people that like I've been on this journey since

2018 I've like known you single I've known you dating like I don't know I kind of forget that you guys know everything about me and Raina and our and our dating lives and you've just been along for the ride and the way the people were like, I screamed in a restaurant or, you know, I couldn't wait. I told my friends there was a group chats about it and I just, it is like overwhelming in the best way. Like I forget sometimes what we do for living and how many people listen to us talk and the lives that we touch and the people that are invested in us. And so just like thank you guys for being along on the ride and being so happy and supportive. It's like crazy the comments and the support. I love you. I'm so happy

I love you. I just, I, Raina is the MVP of all of it. I couldn't, couldn't have done it with her. So I just, thank you so much. I just am so lucky to have you as a best friend. Thanks. I'm just like, I'm over the moon for you guys. I love him so much. It's been nice to get to know him through this process a little more. And I'm just so excited. Yeah. Okay. Well, let's thank our final partner. And then that'll lead us into just a few wrecks for you guys. No, I'm all choked up. I know. So as I'm going to be a Mormon wife, we would like to tell you guys about the secret lives of Mormon. Mormon wives. Yeah, guys, the secret lives of Mormon wives is coming to Hulu on September 6th. So this week, and this is a show I cannot wait to binge watch.

I've actually been watching it. And I'm really enjoying it. This is a group of Mormon moms that grew up in a very conservative Mormon faith. So pretty strict rules, no cursing, tattoos, piercings, alcohol, even caffeine. And really, they need to be like the perfect wife. These women blew up overnight on TikTok and were fully in the spotlight when Taylor, Frankie Paul announced that she and others in the group were involved in. swinging and now they're coming together

for a new reality series that gives you an inside look at the secrets, lies, and gossip of mom talk. I mean, I've been watching it. It's a really interesting watch. It's really different than any other reality TV show I've seen. You guys can watch it this week. Watch the Hulu original series, The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, coming September

6th streaming on Hulu, and that brings us to just the final segment. I mean, this is a really exciting time in television this scientific week. So, yesterday, as this air, yesterday, Wednesday, September 4th. Tell Me Lies, Season 2 premieres.

Ashley and I were crazy about the first season, and the two leads have come out that they are a couple. Unreal. I mean, what could be better? No, I'm kidding. I'm sure it's real. But still, the timing, the hard launch.

It's the sexiest show. I'm so turned on by the lies. That's the theme. It's shot so well. I mean, it's these kids in college and just sort of lies and deception between all of them, and I'm obsessed with the show. It's so, so I cannot wait.

Oh my gosh. And then, um, Today, as this air is, the perfect couple comes out on Netflix. This is a book by Ellen Hildebrand, if you've ever read any of her books. She writes a lot of like Nantucket, all of the books that are based in Nantucket. This is about a couple that's getting married in Nantucket. A very wealthy family has a house there. And on the night of the rehearsal dinner, the maid of honor who is played by Megan Fahey, who we love, is murdered.

So it's a thriller about who killed her. And it jumps a lot back and forth. The book does at least between timelines, trying to figure out who did it. And I loved the book. over the moon to watch it. So that's on Netflix this week. Okay. And then again, Secret Lives and Mormon Wives, those are like our three. We have a couple more we're really excited about, but we'll save it until next week because it's next week. But those are this week's, there's probably more, but. There's some more. Yeah. But they're next week. Okay. So big week.

And then Ashley and I, Final Rock, we watched a movie when we were on vacation called I Used to Be Funny. It's on Apple TV and it's about a girl who's a comedian who's experienced a traumatic event that you sort of then unfold throughout the movie. It stops her from doing comedy and creates some mental health issues. And it was really well done in a beautiful movie. We loved it. Yeah, I don't want to give it away. I think you're not supposed to, I want to give a trigger warning, but I don't want to say what happens. You know, there is a trigger warning on it. But again, I just, it's like you're kind of figuring out in real time. This girl she used to nanny for goes missing and she's involved in it. And it was perfectly done.

It takes place in Toronto. And Rachel Senate is the lead. And there's these really funny comedians. And there are some people I recognize. And they talk about like JFL and Montreal and different things. like that. And so we thought it was like a perfect movie. We watched it as a just the girls, me, Raina Louisa, my mom and my aunt. So that was really fun. Yeah, I loved it. Yeah. Well, I think this episode has been a long time coming. I'm so excited to do it with you. I'm so happy for you. And I know our listeners are also happy for you. And I'm excited to celebrate this on the tour with you. I've been getting really emotional thinking about you walking on stage in Vegas and people like really erupting. I'm like not even going to be able to be out there with you.

I'm just going to be in the wings of running. No, stop. Ryan will carry you out. Then Ryan proposes. No, this is the year I'm going to stop wanting to sleep with Ryan. But I really get emotional thinking about our audience just like erupting and cheers for you. I'm not even doing your little function. We can only wait to see you guys on the tour.

It's really happening. We have all the themes posted on our Instagram. There's a theme for every run. And it starts on September 21st in Vegas and we cannot be more excited. And Monday, you guys are going to hear an episode that we recorded prior to the engagement. So I'm going to call my fiancé, my boyfriend. and it's going to feel a little dated, but it's still a really fun episode, and it's about cheating, and we're really excited about it, but we did record it in advance.

So just a heads up on that. May as well say that now, because it's locked and loaded and ready to go out on Monday. But we wanted to come in here and do this for you guys in person, in New York, where it all began. So fun. And we love you guys. Girls Gottoeat.com. That's where you're going to get those tickets for the cities that we still have them left. Girls Got to Eat podcast on Instagram and TikTok.

I'm Ash Hess. Raina is reina. No, I'm not changing my last name. also while we're here. And that was a question people asked. I've never. And subscribe on YouTube, share this episode with a friend. Thank you guys all again for the support.

And we love you. And we will see you Monday. See you Monday. Guys, have a great weekend. Bye.