Hey Riddle Riddle - #346: Most Sharks Do Not

Episode Date: March 5, 2025

Well. Erin broke a rule and now we have to answer some very important scientific questions. We also have a lot of riddles about space! Far out! Starring:Adal RifaiJohn Patrick CoanErin KeifEditing by: Casey ToneyTheme by: Arne ParrottLogo by: Emily Kardamis & Emmaline MorrisWant more? Get Weekly Bonus Eps on Patreon!JPC's Guided Meditations Volume 1, available now at our Patreon digital store!Want merch? Visit our TeePublic Store! or pins, buttons & printsWant to mail us something? Hey Riddle Riddle 6351 W Montrose Ave #267Chicago, IL, 60634Want to leave us a voicemail? Call (805) RIDDLE-1 or (805-743-3531)Want to advertise on the show? Check out Hey Riddle Riddle via Gumball.fmSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Podcast. the time. Hey guys, we just got a letter from the Riddle Council and I'm reading through it. Yeah. How bad, Aaron? How bad? They're not happy. They're not happy that we called ourselves a little podcast. They're like funny, ditties, you know, those guys. Is it like a cease and deceased or whatever?

Cease and deceased. Yeah. Stop and die. Stop or kill you. Stop and die. That's what... Cease and deceased. Cease and deceased.

A cease and deceased is one of the worst letters you can send someone. Stop and die. Not only should they stop what they're doing, but they should die. I think that's a good, if someone's ever like annoying you, to just yell, stop and die. Oh guys, they're really mad that we put Riddle on our title twice, and we only do a couple riddles per episode. Oh my god. Oh no.

I honestly had to think about that for a second. I was like, is it in there twice? We have 90 days to kill each other or they'll do it for us. Oh my God. Should I just put it in the paperwork pile? I don't really wanna deal with this. Well, whenever someone's like,

you have 90 days to do something or I'll do it for you, I'm like, well then you'll be doing it for me. I mean, what kind of threat is this? And we should say, even if you think, listeners, even if you think you haven't heard about the Riddle Council, their tendrils are everywhere. RC Cola, that stands for Riddle Council Cola. Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. Anything else? But it might just be the one. It just might be that, but even that is like, oh, and I know it's not like the biggest brand of cola. Maybe you haven't heard of it or seen it in like 20 years, but it's bigger than your brand of cola. Yeah.

Except you, Jake Pepsi. Knife right in the neck. Ah, ah, ah, ah. Oh, thank you. You opened up my RC Cola. Damn it. Very famous people have been in the Riddle Council. Yeah. Ray Charles,

Russell Crowe, Rosemary Clooney, Roderick Clemens. Erin, Erin, I'm gonna ask this one time and I'm not gonna ask it again. Did you Google celebrities with RC initials? I'm not allowed to Google. Wow, there must be, I just got a letter from the Riddle Council

said there must be punishment for Aaron breaking the rules. Rob Cordray. Oh my God, what's the punishment? What do I get? This was my rule and I broke it. Oh God. I can't think of anyone without Googling. A celebrity that does RC.

Rosemary Cash. Richard Kixson. Raul Coolia. Oh boy. Can I even think of- Roberto Clemente. Oh boy. Yeah. Can I even think of Roberto Clemente? Ron Curlman. Uh, oh boy.

Just anyone with an R first name would be helpful. Rita Kudner. Well anyways, welcome to Hey Riddle Riddle. Um, at Saddle, that's JPC. We're not allowed to Google this year. Um, and I broke the rule. Yeah. Uh, Aaron, do you mind stepping to the side here? Okay. Just for one second.

Yeah, just outside. Hey GBC, what do we think the punishment should be? Maybe she now has to Google every episode? That's actually a really good punishment. It's like the, we caught her smoking, now she has to smoke the whole pack. The whole pack. Put her in the closet,

they'll come out to you smoke the whole pack. Which is insane, because where's that smoke going? If you're smoking cigarettes in the closet, till the pack's gone? Yeah, and all my jackets are in there. Guys, sorry, I'm smoking a whole pack of cigarettes. Oh. Hey, Erin, you never have to apologize for being cool.

Okay. Erin, every episode we are now going to ask you to Google something, and you have to Google it. No, I don't want to learn. Oh, Aaron, the point of this will not be knowledge. It won't be punishment. We will be having you Google some of the worst stuff that you could ever imagine Googling.

Like what? Aaron, go ahead. Do you have your Google Open Trader? Yeah. I want you to Google Richard Gear Net Worth. Richard Gear Jerbal. No, no, we all know what's going on there. Richard Gear Trump.

Richard Gear Net Worth 2024. Yeah, what is his net worth? It said Richard Gear put a Jerbal up his ass. No, that's not what it said. He, in 2024, he sold his Connecticut home for 10.75 million. Boom! Not a bad change. And he was planning on moving to Spain. Just put 10.8, what are we doing?

Yeah, what are we doing? Aaron, I'm so sorry, that sounds like a very cool, successful sale, but that does not... He's worth 120 million. Thank you! Richard Gere's gotta... Says the internet, but the internet also says you're worth a million, so... Which is way low. Yeah, it's way low.

You just sold your Connecticut home for 10.8 million. Yeah, he just bought Richard, he paid out the ass for Richard Gere's. Paid out the ass? Well, he paid terrible up the ass for... Yee! All right, Aaron, go ahead and Google Unabomber Manifesto good points question mark.

Why is it at JPC.net? What is this? There's some good points in there. Ted Kaczynski knew his stuff. Complete psychopath knew his stuff. He went to MIT, right? Yeah, I think so. MIT, that's the one that is in like a shack in the middle of the woods, right? Yeah.

We've all been to MIT. Did I go to the school? No, but I've walked through the campus. I've worn an MIT T-E-S. Cool. This guy's worn mittens. That's fucking sick, bro. All right. Well, Erin, you're in huge trouble. If you're listening to this, we are currently in the middle of the ocean. Isn't that crazy? We don't like to announce kind of where we are, where we're going to be on the podcast because of killers. But if there's any of you, what are they called? Oh, pirates. If there's any of you pirates out there that are listening to this, you know where to find us.

We're in the middle of the ocean right now, baby. What do you think you're doing right now as this episode comes out? This episode drops at 3 a.m. Central time. So right when this episode drops, Wednesday, 3 a.m. Central time. So right when this episode drops Wednesday, 3 a.m., I am- Is that when it drops? I thought it dropped at midnight Central time.

No, 3 a.m. Oh, okay. And Erin, you've post some of these episodes. Yes. So you, yeah. Yeah, yes, yes, yes. Yeah. Erin, I've been posting at midnight as well. Okay. Okay, so. Oh no. Yeah, yes, yes. Yes, yeah, and I've been posting at midnight as well. Okay, so No

He smoked a whole pack at all We'll do it in prop 2 a little meeting so we when they with the network emails us Unfortunately, we do have to read those emails. I know I know The patreon I post the patreon at 10 p.m I know, nobody wants to be- I think I'm thinking of the Patreon. I post the Patreon at 10 p.m. Yes, Aaron, that is correct. The Patreon posts at midnight, that is correct.

And then 1 a.m. is for the main feed. Which for you is 3 a.m. No, it's 1 a.m. for me. It's for you, which is 3 a.m. Yeah, but it's essentially the same thing. This is a main feed episode. So we all figured it out. We know where we are.

And why does it feel like a Patreon? I'll say right now, Wednesday, 3 AM, I'm probably eating breakfast or lunch. Yeah. Oh, god. I wonder what I'm doing. Well, it would be kind of 5 AM. I think I'm probably asleep right now.

And then I'm probably sort of laughing with my friends if you're listening to this later in the day. I'm probably asleep right now, but Mariah did tell me the other night we were sleeping and she kind of like, I think she woke up, she had to go to the bathroom or something, but I was asleep as well and she saw me go, ha ha ha, what?

While I was asleep. Now I don't remember this at all. Oh, scary. But I had a little laugh and I kind of gave a little like, what's going on, like, what is this? So I don't remember, when we talked about it the next day, I don't remember if I was having a dream. I very rarely remember my dreams,

but I thought that was funny. I thought that was fun. I was having a good time in a dream. So that's my guess, three A.M. That's pretty good. You have dream friends. Hmm, scary stuff, man. Scary stuff.

Scary stuff. Scary stuff. How many sharks do we think we've seen at this point on the boat? Lone sharks? Lone sharks, card sharks, shark sharks, Jetson sharks. I wanted to say like sharknadoes.

Like a shark as like a shart, but I was like, what is this? What? Yeah. I don't want to make a shark in your pants. I don't know. I think it's impossible for sharks to shark because they don't wear pants. Because they don't wear pants.

They're just always in the water. Yeah. Why you guys? And do they fart? No. Why would they? Sharks. Oh, Erin, JBC.

This is the perfect episode for Erin to broken her oath. Da da da da da. Erin, please Google, do sharks fart? Erin, go ahead and Google, do sharks fart? Do sharks fart. Thank you very much. Do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do. Most sharks do not fart. Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on.

But sand packing sharks usually... One shark is throwing off all the netta. not fart hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on That's so embarrassing I would be so embarrassed about The answer is also written by sharks. Yes sharks fart most sharks don't then whoever whatever shark said that turn their head to look at like Kyle to look at like one shark specifically Can't turn their head turn their whole body. It's not subtle at all. They turn their whole ass body to look at one shark. Oh you guys, I'm crying.

And then Kyle's like. Shark just ate a big bean fish and it's like what? Kyle's like I guess I'll keep moving or else I'll die. Like I have to keep going to different communities because I'm the one shark who farts. That's a children's book. The one shark, the one shark who farts. I love it. The one shark who farts.

Hold on, I'm running this down. You were saying that what type of shark does fart? You guys, I have terrible. I've got good news and good news. Tiger, sand tiger sharks can release gas bubbles from their cloaca. Just say fart. What are we doing? But most shark species do not fart, but other fish.

You guys, some bony fish have swim bladders that are connected to their digestive tract. These fish can release gas from their swim bladders through their mouths. Through their mouths. No, hold on, hold on, hold on. Fisher farting through their mouths. Through their mouths. No, hold on, hold on, hold on. Fisher farting through their mouths. This changes everything.

Fish fart out their mouth, not all sharks fart, one does. This, I... Only one shark farts. What would you do if you were hanging out with some friends and a friend like burped, but the sound that came out from the burp was the sound of a fart? I would find new friends. There's a burp.

Jellyfish, corals and sea anemones cannot fart. Yeah, okay. That must be so painful. Yeah. Does it say can or does it say may? Is it one of those things where you ask your teacher, like, can I go to the bathroom? Or they're like.

They may fart. They may fart. Squid, octopus and cuttlefish can fart. That makes sense. Oh, I believe squids can fart. Shark don't pee. Their urine is absorbed into the flesh. That's not healthy.

Honestly, that sounds like the most healthy thing. It sounds like sharks are wearing a steel suit. Like they're like fremen. I would honestly, if you told me that I could just absorb the pee, oh God. But what if, I hate to do this. Maybe the number one answer of all time from our podcast, how would you pee out the poison?

Yeah, that's right, the poison would just stay in. That'd be rough. Shark skin feels exactly like sandpaper, and there's absolutely no way to tell if some fish get thirsty or not. Erin. What? Erin, we asked you to Google, very specifically, do sharks fart? We did this.

Stingrays can burp. Stingrays can burp. Stingrays can burp. What did you say about some sharks feel like sandpaper? What was it? Their skin feels like sandpaper. I thought they were gonna be slimy. What was the other part of that? You said something else.

Stingrays can burp? No, before that. Oh, oh, there's no way to tell if fish can get thirsty. Yeah, Erin, what are you talking about? They live in water. I know, well, they absorb water, but also. There's no way, how do we even begin to unpack this? Saltwater fish have to drink.

There's no way to tell if fish get thirsty. If so, what? Birds actually don't fart at all. According to the book, which please buy this book for me, does it fart? The definitive guide to animal flatulence, birds don't have the necessary gas producing gut. What animals don't fart?

If you have that book, go ahead and send that to the hate-ridden-ridden P.O. Box. I hope we get 100 copies of does it fart. This is like a good is it cake. Yeah. Most insects don't fart. Aaron, when you say that birds don't fart, does that mean that every time a bird goes to poop,

it's successful? Um. By the way, what a hit rate. They said that your mom went last night. I don't know. Whoa. All right, Aaron, this can't be what the episode is. Should we do some models?

I wish it was. I wish it was just Aaron Googling things. Do insects fart. It could just be Aaron Googling things. Ah! Yes, some insects fart, but not all of them do. That's how we get honey. Yeah, turns again, looks at Mark.

Oh, you guys, this is terrible. Mark, you should be farting! You're making all the pregnant women look mad! You're gonna absolutely hate these two bugs that fart a lot. Stink bug and dung beetle? No, well, stink bugs do fart a lot, but termites and cockroaches fart,

especially when they eat a high-fiber diet. Oh, wood farts? Ugh! I'm actually fine with that, because both of those are kind of gross bugs to me. I eat a high fiber diet. Ew. Wood farts? Oh. Those fucking turbite wood farts. I'm actually fine with that because both of those are like kind of gross bugs to me. So if you're like, hey, the gross bug does more gross stuff.

I'm like, yeah, I already thought it was gross. I, it's not like, what's a bug I have a really high opinion of? What are we doing? Butterfly? Addle? Butterfly. I think butterflies are saints. If I hear any differently about a butterfly, I'll call you a liar to your face, but let me make it clear moths are disgusting

Yeah, I mean honestly butterflies Pretty sick pretty sick looking I mean fun to see from a distance up close. You're like damn You're a real bug. You're a real ass bug. You're just hiding. Your wings are nice, but the rest of you fucked up. Yeah, it's fucked up and bugged. I have some riddles from Matthew McNeese Young. Okay. And I think that these are a fun format

and I hope that people are inspired by this and they send in more for us. But you're gonna really like the title to these, okay? But. Matthew McNeese Young. That took a turn. I didn't expect the Young to be shoehorned in there. Yeah, and it's also like, you've got, like...

This is good, because the riddle is his name. Let's dig into it, gang. You've got, like, Young and Neese in there as well, which feels like you, it's like... There should be, like, a guy whose name is, like... Connor O'Nephew Old, or something like that. That's his cousin. Yeah. We all know how cousins work.

Cousins have opposite names, that's how it works. The inverse of your name. Yeah. And when I tell you the name of this segment, you can't make a joke, okay? I won't, why would I? Okay, okay. These are a game he's calling Celebrity Mouthfuls.

Mm-hmm. Insect farts. Each one will have a celebrity's name and two other things that rhyme with it. Okay. So I think we should just get into it. I'll do the first one and then you'll understand. Let's get 20 minutes in, let's get into it.

I really meant to start earlier, but then you guys, we learned that only one kind of shark can fart and that's so important, that's so important for our friendship, forget it. This is why we shouldn't Google on the show because this is what happens when we do it. And this is what happens when the Riddle Committee comes after us, we double down and get worse. This is what it sounds like, one shark's fart,

boom, boom, boom, prince. This actor known for playing playing Sunny Corleone in The Godfather, is snacking on a French custard dessert while driving on a German highway famous for having no speed limit. James Conn, Flawn, Autobahn. But you make it into like a coherent sentence. Hell.

James Conn eating. James Conn eating Flawn on the Autobahn. Yeah. James Con Kahn eating flan on the Autobahn. Yep. James Kahn eating flan on the Autobahn. And now, and these all sort of sound like the warmups that JPC used to do before it, in person recording. James Kahn eating a flan on the Autobahn.

This American actor who starred in Cocoon is snacking on a soft cheese while riding on a recreational water vehicle Wilford Brimley eating soft cheese Bree mm-hmm Eating yep on a jet ski Wilford Brimley eating Brie on a jet ski You two are co-workers in GPC. You two are coworkers in JPC. You're sort of known for exaggerating and lying a lot.

But this past weekend, you really did see Wilford Brimley eating Bree on a jet ski. And you're trying to explain this to Adil and Adil, you don't really believe him. Have you seen where the the new wrenches are being displayed? Yeah, it's like aisle seven, I think. Wait, how was your weekend? Oh, it was good. Went scuba diving, thought a great white was a great white, which is a new type of shark.

It's half pike, you know, the fish pike, and half great white. It was swimming right towards me, but then it farted, and I was like, oh, that's not a threat. If that makes sense. Oh, I'm going to go hang up these wrenches. Yeah, no, that makes sense. I'm sorry. What you just said just kind of, I was going to lie to you about something that I saw this weekend as well. Oh. It just kind of feels like you kind that I saw this weekend as well. Oh

Just kind of feels like you kind of like pre lied on me. Oh, sorry I brought this great wike, which I've never even heard of and like it farted and like what were you doing in the ocean? Yeah, I was you know ocean this weekend Yeah, my cousin's a cartographer which means he finds maps and he found some some doubloons a chest full of the blooms from the Spanish Armada that got lost and we We were able to sort of triangulate the position and I get what's going on. I get what's going on Huh? Everybody thinks that I lie. No one wants to talk to me

So now everybody's coming up to me and they're coming up with lies about things that they did. No. Like I tasted my own medicine. Ricky. No, it's fine. You are 8 feet 9, 10,000 pounds. I get it. I get it.

I get it. I saw Wilford and Bradley eating brie on a jet ski this weekend. Come on, man. I saw that. That happens to me. Why would a spokesman for diabetes eat cheese? Everybody's gotta get gout. Everybody's gotta eat. I hope you get got. Gout. Whoa. I hope you get got. Gout. Overreaction. Alright Erin, hit us with another one of these things.

All right. This American politician who served as the White House Chief of Staff for the first six months of Donald Trump's presidency is solving a word puzzle that uses pictures and letters to represent words or phrases with an unborn child. Sean Spicer? No. Who was the Chief of Staff? Was it Bannon?

Was Bannon the Chief of Staff? No. No, he was the National Security Advisor. Scaramoochie? I forgot about this character. Yeah, because like with every of the... Oh my god, 2016, what a time to be alive. All of those early Trump characters, they lasted for so short a time.

Yeah. A lot of turnover. Yeah. Well, maybe do the other parts of it. What's an unborn child? born child, yep Cletus cletus fetus cletus this person's last name rhymes with fetus. Mm-hmm I'm actually gonna I googled again. I'm a Rosa a YouTube video on how to say this guy's name Here it scare me just Ryan's previous right previous I googled again. I'm a Rosa a YouTube video on how to say this guy's name here at scaram meches

Reince Priebus Reince Priebus Reince Priebus. Oh god. I forgot about right for God. What about the word puzzle? Rebus word puzzle Right Reince Priebus with a fetus doing a rebus It solves a rebus with a fetus. And have you guys ever listened to Rebus McIntyre? Oh, I love Rebus. I'll sing a mom who works,

who don't love the kids and never stops. I promised myself I'd never sing on the show again. I'm breaking promises left and right. After Rhynes Priebus went away, I heard that they retired his jersey. They retired both of those names. They retired the first name Rhynes and the last name Priebus.

We never have to know those two names ever again. As someone whose name is Adel Shokirafai, Reince Priebus is a fucked name. Ha ha ha ha! I'm throwing stones from a glass house. You're like, okay, the guy's name is Reince Priebus, and you're like, oh, that kinda sucks. And you're like, is he a good guy?

And someone's like, no. You're like, ah, oh, that kind of sucks. And you're like, is he a good guy? And someone's like, no. You're like, oh, thank God. Thank God. Thank God I feel comfortable making fun of this man's name. I once bought a Toyota Priebus and it crapped out on me. After six months? After six months. Yeah, I once bought some bad shampoo

that told me to lather Reince repeat. And I was like, no, thank you. Erin, do you wanna do one? I don't have one to share, no, no, no. Erin, just do one. Erin, Google, Google one. How do you say his first name again? Rites. Rites. Rites.

I don't know, they didn't come from rites and wrong. Yeah. Um. Like a rhinestone cowboy. I think I told you guys this. You have the rites to remain awful. Awful. Awful. This is a absolute plug for me mid-episode,

but I've been re-listening to the Teachers' Lounge podcast. It's a fantastic podcast. And the first nine seasons are available for free, and then you can buy the other ones from the big grande website. And we've had all of those guys on the show before, but the way that the three of them shit on John Mackie constantly is so funny to me because they'll all do a run off like a pun on someone's name

and they'll like take all the good puns and then they'll be like, John? Well, not John because it's not John on the podcast, but they'll be like, now you do one, now you do one. And I was like, that's the way that we treat Aaron. That's the way I treat Aaron when we do our pun runs. And you know what? I'm similar to John Mackie in that way. That's that's the way that we treat Aaron. That's the way I treat Aaron when we do our puns. And you know what? I'm similar to John Mackie in that way. We do a lot of setting up to other for other people.

It's an honor. It's an honor. You're... It's an honor and a privilege. Previous privilege. Aaron, you're very similar to John Mackie, who's absolutely a delight in the treat, but You're not tall. I know. He's so tall.

Fun fact about John Mackie. My dog loves John Mackie. She just walked in my house and was like, what's up? Are you my brother? I love this. Great vibe. Um, okay. Let's be serious guys.

No more joking. I would never, I would never even think to joke. Okay, let's be serious guys, no more joking. I would never, I would never even think to joke. Let's not send people to a funnier podcast, okay? Let's keep, everyone hang out here. This Chicago improviser is sitting on an oar. Oh, this Chicago improviser is sitting on an oar. Addle on a paddle. But how is he sitting?

What's a way to sit on something? Addle straddles a paddle. Addle straddles a paddle. Addle straddle paddle. I'd like to see a scene. I almost went in a completely different direction with that because there is a Chicago Improvisor whose last name is Or, and I was like,

oh, come on, what are we doing here? How would this person know that? I don't know. I know it. That I'm the one whose brain has to do the thing. Um, okay. So the scene I'd like to see is, um, we're all on a camping trip. Sure.

Um, and Adol we've woken up and you're in the middle of the lake straddling an oar and you're trying to explain yourself to JPT. Okay The hell is going on out here Adol It's two in the morning. What are you? Are you on the lake right now? Erin get the flashlight? Oh, why what's going on? I think Adol's on the lake right now Aaron get the flashlight? Oh? What's going on? I think Adel's on the lake right now. Adel is of course. He's of course. He's awake It's two in the morning. What do you think he's on the lake right now? Oh, no Adel what's going on, bud? I thought to, I wanted to get, when you guys woke up, I thought it would be funny if I was fucking a canoe.

Sorry, can you say that louder? You're sort of in the middle of the lake. Well, there's other people camping. I don't, I thought- Hold on, let me get the flashlight. No. Oh, yeah, okay. He looks like a swamp monster. Oh shit, that's-

It's a maglight, baby. It's never dark in America. He's- I don't know what they use, there's like a prison escape. This is some wide berth. He's naked out there. He's naked in the atl. I got bored and horny.

It's so cold. We said we'd stop using that as an excuse for our behavior. We were all trying to be accountable. I know, but I just, tell me Sesame Street, because I got boredon Horny. Are those the two Muppets that are roommates? You know they're not. Oh, there are children camping here.

And you know those aren't the Muppets. What are you doing? You're not even on a canoe, you're just on an oar. You're on an oar. You're like balancing on an oar out there? What went wrong? Listen, I woke up and, well, I've been up for a while. Where are your clothes? wrong. Where are your clothes?

I don't know. No. He's high. He's dead. I am dead. A woman carved out of a tree. He's high. He's high. He's high. Why don't you just ask for, I'm not. I'm crawling back into bed. He's high.

I'm gonna zip myself back into my tent. Remember OK Go? I'm in my tent. Remember OK Go in their videos? Remember when OK Go made that treadmill video? Yeah, we all. I don't wanna enable you. I do love the OK GO videos though. Remember that car commercial?

Hey, Erin. That was so sick. What? You can be in your tent or you can be out here with us. But you can't participate. OK, then I'll be in my tent. I'm not going to be the go-between between you and your tent and Addle in the middle of the lake.

I'm just not going to be doing that anymore. I'm not going to be offering that. Ask Addle if he remembers the Rube Goldberg machine OK GO video. Ask him. How would he forget? You think somebody watched one Okko video and said, Enough of their antics. I think some of them are not top of mind.

Ask him. Wait, why is it that I can remember their videos but none of their songs? You don't remember when the morning comes. Ask out all of your members. You're right. There ain't much that's dumber. Ain't nothing that's dumber than trying to forget a girl when you love her and I, I still need you.

Ask him if he knows that one. How? Because I don't know that one and I wasn't listening well enough to be able to repeat the song. Repeat after me. Need it is one thing. Mom, what's all this noise? I'm going to get out of the tent.

Ah! No, don't worry. It's just the Muppets, Bored and Horny out there. Let's see. Hey, hey Bored. Hey Horny. We are going to go on a very, very quick break. The briefest of breaks. The briefest of breaks.

And then I'll tell you about a classic Aaron mix-up when we get back from Liberty. This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. Squarespace is the only website platform for entrepreneurs to stand out and succeed online. You guys, I'm trying to write a theme song. Hey kid, hey kid, we're in the booth here. We love what you got, but you gotta have more confidence.

Okay. From the top? Yeah, before we do this, I actually, I wanna work on my website. Do you guys have any tips, tricks? The Squarespace. Yeah. Oh.

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Hey, Ritual Britchel. Hey, Ritual Britchel. Hey, Ritual Britchel. Wow, Erin, that is insane. So you thought you were ordering a Mai Tai, but you drank a man's Tai? Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Was it good? What a classic Erin mix-up. Insane.

Speaking of Erin mix-ups, I was putting some stuff away, reorganizing my house, and I knocked down my entire little shelf of riddle books that were organized by person who gave them to me. So fun fact, I don't know who gave me this book. I think it might be Molly, San Francisco Molly. Okay. But I'm not 100% sure. So if you gave me this book and it wasn't Molly, please reach out to me and I'd like to give you credit. I'm so sorry. This sucks because Molly has her own theme.

I know. But we can't in good conscious play that theme if this wasn't Molly's book. I know this is what I mean. This is a huge controversy. I don't know what to do. This is a dilemma. And I ran into Molly in San Francisco and Molly was like, I gave Erin another book

and I'm excited to hear my theme again. Wow. Okay, so what if we just played the theme and it's not connected to this at all? I would rather die than give credit where credit is not deserved. Yeah. Adel, what do you think we should do?

I think we should maybe hum the theme. That way, if it was Molly, box ticked. And if it wasn't, we just happened to be humming a song. What if we all sing it at the same time? Cause I'm sure we all remember how it goes. Yes. One, two, three. Everybody.

Rock your Molly. Okay guys, we sort of got distracted. Everybody. Rock your Molly book. Backstreet Boys. Okay, these are all mad scientist riddles. Ooh, yes, yes. All of them.

They're all about science. Aaron, no, nevermind, it's dumb. Battle, what is it? Can you Google to scientists fart? It says, most scientists don't fart, Kyle. What? Aaron, before you read each of these, It says, most scientists don't fart, Kyle. What? Kyle.

And before you read each of these, could you say, I was working in a lab. Um, let's see, am I being paid enough for that? Yes. Ha ha ha. Turns out, yes. If she said no, I'd be like, what does she think she's worth? I was working in a the moon last night.

How did Mary's little lamb get to Mars? Wow. And this is a mad scientist question? No, they're all science riddles. Some of them are mad scientist specific. Oh, so this has to do with science. So we have to be. Mary had a little lamb whose fleece was white as snow, right? So that's gotta be important.

No. No. Mary had a little lamb. Was there any other defining characteristics about Mary's lamb? This is like a joke, Riddle. Okay. Oh, yo, oh.

Oh, yeah? Oh, no. Okay. Oh, yo, oh. Oh, yeah. Oh, no, shit. How did Mary's little lamb get to Mars is a joke riddle? How would you get to anywhere? Oh, practice. No, no, no. Ship.

Yeah, yeah. Practice. But what kind of? A spaceship. What's another way of saying that? How like a little kid would say it. Rocket. Yeah. A rocket ship. Yeah, but then replace one of the words. How like a little kid would say it. Rocket. Yeah. A rocket ship. Yeah, but then replace one of the words.

But it's a lamb. A lamb ship. No. A rocket lamb. Rocket shank. Rocket? Crook. What's another way of saying lamb, basically?

Lamb sheep. Yes. Rocket sheep. It's a rocket sheep. Yes. Wow. I hate and love this. I do, I would like to see it.

Oh. Oh, no, I hate and love this So you are gonna be Two NASA scientists and you're going to be explaining to me I'm gonna be like the astronaut that's going on this mission that due to budget cuts You have to build the rocket out of wool great budget cuts, you have to build the rocket out of wool. Great. Dr. Anderson, thank you so much for taking the time to come in here and sort of run through some logistics with us. Absolutely.

I'm excited to get back up to a place that I kind of consider my second home, space. Wow, that's awesome. And how's training going this time around? Feeling good? Feeling ready? Feeling good. I love the crew. The other two people that we've got going up to space are consummate professionals.

Top of their scientific fields. Physical peak performance athletes. We're ready to get back up into that place I like to call my home away from home. We do have some news. You are going alone this time. Yeah. Oh, okay. I'll break it to the other astronauts. They won't take it well, but I guess I understand. Yeah, and we also can't. A lot of the materials that we usually use, they burn up in the atmosphere or they're lost in the ocean once the ship returns. You can't reuse them. It's just getting very expensive. So we have to in the atmosphere or they're lost in the ocean once the ship returns and we it's

just getting very expensive so we have to kind of pivot in terms of the materials we're using for your ship right and we can afford to send you there but we can't afford to get you back wait now hold on we're assuming you can hitch a ride from I was okay with the thing that this gentleman was saying but right you want me to take a one-way death mission into space your own your words your words your words your words on ours Well, here's the here's okay. I'll level with you. We have $750 to get you there right no, but no, but we did we did say this year We were gonna do a team dinner where we sort of pick a nice place

But we did say this year we were gonna do a team dinner where we sort of pick a nice place And go out to dinner. So that's gonna cut into the 750. That's coming out of the same budget line item. Yeah Yes, so build a spaceship and team dinner. Buca di Beppo tomorrow at 5 We have a $500, $99 budget. Tuesday at 5pm? And then that doesn't include 10 but you won't be there because you'll be in space. You'll be in space. I'm going to space today? Yup. Yes.

And here's what we've sort of bouncing the budget crunching the numbers. We've come up with a few items. Okay. We can make your ship out of straw, bricks, feathers, or wool. Or sticks. Or wool. And we have a wolf coming in and sort of blowing at it to do those sort of tests I feel like you see mad. Are you mad? Are you a little mad? Yeah, I'm a little mad

I thought NASA was I thought as it was getting serious here. Yeah Yo, yeah, yes, we're being so serious Was to build a one-way spaceship out of sticks, and I don't even get to eat breadsticks at Mucatibepo. Yeah, we can't afford to send you up there with food. So I'd say have a big meal before you go, sort of like pasta dinner with protein. Well, I want to do that. I want to go to Mucatibepo in a family style.

No, no, no. We all want to go to Mucatibepbo, but some of us have higher callings. You just said this was your home away from home. Yeah, your second home. So you probably have food up there somewhere, right? Well, it's kind of like a timeshare, where I don't really keep anything stocked. Yeah. Yeah, I mean it's a vacation house.

If you keep food in a vacation house and you're only there three weeks a year, I mean it's like, oh boy, bugs. You know what I'm saying? Oh. Also, we've been using your space helmet as a basketball hoop. So if you had one at home or like... How would that even work? You have to cut a hole in the bookie.

Yep, you cut a hole in it. That's the way. You cut a hole in it. Save me. Okay. That man will die. Yeah, he'll die in space. What? Travels? You know what? He won't make it to space. That man will die. Yeah, he'll die in space. What travels?

He won't make it to space. I'll say that. Well, not with that attitude. What travels around the earth all year without using a drop of fuel? Um, not Globetrotters? Yeah. Yeah. However, Globetrotters famously get called for traveling.

Never. I don't know. Do they get called? Maybe they never even make the call. What calls around the world? Wait, what is it? What travels around the world without using any gas? Mm-hmm.

Without using a drop of fuel. Erin. Yep. Oh my God. What? What travels around the world without using gas? A shark! Sharks.

Sharks go all around the oceans. Sharks don't fart except for one. That sounds like the beginning to like a Mr. Ed style like theme of like the amazing farty shark. A shark is a shark, of course, of course. The amazing farty shark! I'm farty shark. I hope I get a promotion at work. I hope I don't fart.

I miss real comedies. I wish the comedies were good. When it was pure. Travels around the world without using a drop of fuel. Is it a stamp? Travels around the earth all year without using a drop of fuel. This one is a good riddle.

Stamp is a good one. Is it like a rumor? Remember what our topic was a minute ago? What were you talking about? Maths scientists. Yeah, but specifically the sheep one. What? The theming of that one.

Oh, space. Yeah. Oh, is it like the moon or the sun? The moon. Yeah. I would like to see a scene. Adel, you are the Earth and JBC, sun? The moon. The moon. I would like to see a scene. Adel, you are the Earth. And JBC, you're the moon.

And you've been traveling for a really long time, and you're finally working up the courage to ask the Earth for some, like, gas money. To split fuel costs. Keep on rockin' in the free world. Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do It's going great. How are you doing? Man, I'm good. Yeah, just doing doing doing what you told me man. Just keep Keep circling around. Yeah, I appreciate it man. It's making me feel not I don't feel as dumb Like if I was just spinning on my own sure but since you're here with me brother, I appreciate it Whoo, yeah, and I'm doing my thing on the oceans too. I know you said you oh Yeah, yeah, I do my little tug give the ocean a little do my moon tug

Yeah, punch it in But you know what dude? Yeah, um Crazy though. It's already my sister 30th. No, no, I wouldn't yeah You told me that yeah, he said Venus is off-limits. It's already the 30th my man. I could um I Know you said I couldn't remember if we agreed on Like by annually or Hmm was it monthly for the for the paycheck leap year page? No, I was trying to think about like Check leap year page. No, I was trying to think about like

Yeah, brother. I'm gonna be here for a minute and I'm like I've been paid or like should I even like bring it up or like have I have we talked about this or like yeah I mean, oh I get money makes me super uncomfortable especially when it comes to me having to pay it say Like I went out to eat with Saturn the other day and it just felt Oh for real. Oh, sorry, and it just felt Oh for real? Oh for real. Oh sorry, and I didn't, I just thought, you had something right? No I came because I have to. Uh, but no I, yeah, I think I must have been on the dark side or something because I got

no reception that whole dinner. Oh yeah. But it was a thing of like, you know, I ate well, and then the check comes and then Saturn's like, well you had this, and I'm like, what are we doing? Let's just, let's just split the bill. And Saturn's like, all I got was ice water and an appetizer. And I'm like, it's so much easier to just split the bill. But like, I feel like it's like different,

cause like you and Saturn are like equals, like you're like at the same level, and like I like definitely like work for you're like at the same level and like I like definitely like work for you like it's definitely a relationship in which I am like I Don't want to say no because I know I get 1099s and so I know that just kind of makes me like a Contractor for you, and I know I work you know 24-7 I'm always up here going around and I told you you could take a break if you want. Hey guys, I'm collecting money to buy the son a birthday gift. Do you guys want to contribute or?

Damn, is that time of year already? Son's birthday? I don't have any cash. That's okay, Moon can probably cover you, right? Can someone get me? Yeah, Moon, you got me? Truly, I'm like so... cash poor right now. It's like...

I don't even have like... resources. You can put on credit though, right? Yeah, I guess I gotta have to do it. I guess I gotta have to put on more credit. Thanks man, I appreciate you looking up. I mean the sun is what gives you your light, I feel like. Yeah, it's not really doing much for me.

Just cause I don't have like atmosphere or whatever. I'm not really capturing any like yeah, it's not really doing much for me. Just cuz I don't have like atmosphere or whatever I'm not really capturing any of that school. Yeah, let's chill Hey Could I get light on the dark side as well if that's if the sun's giving out light if I could get someone that dark Hey, man, that's that's really it's not good to ask We're friends here man, but you can't be taking advantage of your friends like that. Yeah Not to the ass friends here man but you can't be taking advantage of your friends like that. Yeah not till they ask. Not till they ask. Hey real quick who are you?

Yeah what's your... ooh you got a nice celestial body. Jupiter! Wait no! Wait no! Wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait How do you put a baby astronaut to sleep? Okay. Okay. Okay. Put a baby in like a bassinet. Okay, so a mobile. Rock them to sleep.

Oh. Mobile? Nope. Rock? Moon rock them to sleep. You rock them to sleep. Them to sheep. It's not a great way to describe a human baby.

Is the answer that you rock them to sheep? No, it's you rocket to sleep. You rocket. You rocket. Wow, rocket baby. Yeah, rocket baby. Elton John's prequel? Before he is a rocket man,, he is a rockababy.

Let's not be crazy. What do, oh, it's like Muppet Babies, but it's Baby Elton John. Oh my God, it's like Muppet Babies, but it's all the most famous singers of all time is Babies. Baby Prince, Baby David Bowie. Hendrix Baby is shredding in your room.

How do we do that? Are they Muppets or are they people? What's going on? They're babies. JPC. They're animated babies. I am so sorry I spoke in ignorance. Muppets are people, they can fart, they do fart,

they may fart. Some muppets fart. Out of the puppeteer's wrist? Gonzo. You big turd. What do you call a person who is crazy about going into space? Space insane?

Yeah, space madness. They got space madness. They're crazy about going into space. JBC, you suffered from space madness for like two years, right? How did you get through that? Oh God. Did I get through it?

No, those are two years that are current. Oh, okay, current. I'm in my second year of space madness. Oh, well, God. Did I get through it? No, those are two years that are current. They're current. I'm in my second year of space madness. Oh, well, congratulations. Thank you for asking. And you think you have a Riddle podcast that's how crazy you've got? Okay.

It's a person who's cra... Wait, you said that they... Can you say the question? An insane person. What do you call a person who is crazy about going into space? A lunar. A lunar.

Lunar, lunar-y. I like the way you're thinking, but no. Crazy about going into space. That'd be some sort of pun here. We gotta be in a pun. Medi-ordinary. Erin, give us a hand. Needy ordinary. What's the name of a person that goes into space?

Astronaut. No. Astronauts! Yep. Someone who's astro nuts. What do you? That sounds like if someone's, what's the thing, remember when they used to have commercials for Space Camp

on Nickelodeon? Oh yeah. For sure. If you won a piece of the agro-crag, you'd go to space camp. Yeah. You know the thing that like spins you, the gyroscope or something?

Oh, the zero G like thing? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like every kid wanted to ride in that. That feels like if someone got out of that and barfed and then another kid at space camp was like, suck on these astro nuts. Like,

Astro nuts feels like a childish insult. To me it was like, this is what the flight attendants on the space station, spacecraft, the rocket, this is what they offer you. They're like, astro nuts or astro pretzels. Some people are allergic to astro. You guys, what if we did a review crew of three weeks at space camp?

I was on an airplane recently and yeah, we should go to space camp as adults. Do you think they let us do that? But they gave, they were handing out nuts on airplanes. And I was like, I thought that they stopped doing this, but I guess not. I thought they did too. Yeah, I thought they switched to pretzels.

It was strange. It was like, like tree nuts, like almonds and cashews and stuff. And I was like, this is interesting. You witnessed an assassination attempt, I think is what happened. What do you call an astronaut who's afraid of heights? Coward.

Not going to space? Oh. A failure. That's the answer. Is it a failure? Your joke was real. Well, here's the thing. Yeah.

And I don't know, as I'm talking, I don't know if this is right. When you go into space, you're not necessarily going up. I guess to get out of the atmosphere, you have to go up. But it could be down. Because space is all directions. Well, yeah, but you gotta go, you have to,

you can't go down to leave Earth, you know what I'm saying? That gets you right, that gets you deeper. Well, if you. You gotta go down to leave Earth. You know what I'm saying? That gets you right. That gets you deeper. Well, if you... You gotta go up a little bit. I know, but like up could be like, we just decided that the North Pole was the North Pole. Yeah. But up could actually be the South Pole.

Directions have no meaning in space, JPC. I just, yeah, but you're on Earth when you just start. When you get to space, you could be a philosopher. You could say, hey, there's no up. But before you get there, you kind of, up is really the way to get to space. I don't know. I don't know about all that.

I think you sound pretty astro-nuts. You think a guy who's in year two of space madness seems astro-nuts? Aaron, I can't wait for this episode to come out. They're going to come for you so hard. You just called someone with space madness, Astra nuts. Okay, come at it. Whoa, Nilda Gras Tyson just pushed Erin down a flight of stairs.

God, again? This is a pattern. This is a pattern. This is a pattern. First as farce, then as tragedy. Which is lighter, the sun or the earth? This is not literal. Hey, I want to go back to that for a second though, because, you know, if you're an astronaut

and you're afraid of heights, I feel like that's probably, you know, probably maybe a little bit disqualifying. It's probably hard to do. But I also used to think that, again, I'm gonna be talking about how I was on an airplane recently, I thought like pilots, one of the things for being a pilot was that you had to have like perfect vision. Maybe that's only like in the military. Have they lowered their standards? I got off a plane and both of the pilots had glasses on. Wow. I was like, what the fuck is going on here? Are these like, and I know aviators, you know,

obviously pilots could wear sunglasses. That's cool as shit. But these were like glasses, glasses. Now I don't know, maybe they didn't have any lenses in them. Maybe they were just for the look. These were just like fashion glasses, like they do in a movie.

But is that something I made up? Are pilots allowed to have glasses? I know it was true in the military and they can't be colorblind Yes, that's the two things I've heard about pilots is they have to have perfect vision and they can't be colorblind But I thought that was all pilots not just military. I thought it was all pilots too. And maybe these were like I Don't know. I couldn't I couldn't tell you what it was I I saw I only saw it when the plane was already landed and I was like well It's too late for me to file a report.

Yeah. They should let you look the pilot in the eyes before you get on the plane, just to make sure. Hold on to those little charts. It is so interesting. I'm dating someone who has perfect vision and I'm like, well, you really, it does- Most people have that.

No, but I've never done that. Every other person I've dated has been basically as blind as I am. I have really bad vision. Whoa. It's a difference in how you move through the world. I think it changes a lot of your personality. Erin, do you wanna hear something?

Yeah. I've got perfect vision. No, you don't. 2020, baby. I've seen you wear glasses. It's 2025. Oh, I sometimes't. 2020, baby. I've seen you wear glasses. It's 2025. Oh, I sometimes have like, they're not prescription. They're like blue blockers.

Like for, if you stare at your screens. When I used to work in an office and I would stare at a screen all day, I wore like the blue light glasses or whatever. But that's only because the staring is- I'm sorry, you have perfect vision? Perfect vision. I will say, it don't last forever.

Every time I go to the optometrist or whatever, they're like, okay, it's technically 2020, but you know, you're getting old. Erin, can I blow your mind? What? GBC has perfect vision. I have perfect pitch. I have perfect pigeon.

I have a perfect pigeon. I have the perfect pigeon. Erin? He's a good boy. Erin, I have a perfect pigeon. I have the perfect pigeon. Aaron? He's a good boy. Aaron, I have the perfect pigeon for you. Oh. I know you're not looking. I know you're not looking.

Who said I'm not looking for a pigeon? Squabble up. Which is lighter, the sun or the earth? This will be our last one. Okay, which is the best? Well, the earth is lighter because the sun shines on it. Is that the answer? No.

Something like that? Oh. Fuck you. It's kind of a joke. Fuck you too. Adam, wait, no, hold on. I'm gonna have Neil deGrasse Tyson push you down the stairs. Hold on.

Hey, this is the lake in the tent all over again. I'm not gonna be in the middle of one more of these fights. Ask Adam if he can go fuck himself. I'm not gonna ask him that. Ask him. I'm gonna ask him. So you got Neil DeGrasse Mike Tyson and he punched me so hard. Okay.

Well, I put that on purpose, so fuck you. Hey. The sun, it's the answer is the sun because it rises every morning. Are you happy now? Are you happy now boys? But the sun doesn't rise. The Earth turns. And the sun is in the middle of the Earth.

And the planet. Oh, because of the number in it. Ha ha ha ha. What kind of bath does the mad scientist take without water? Space bath. Space bath, Erin. Oh, a meteor shower. Oh my God.

That's a way better answer. Oh. That's not the answer? And then the next riddle is, what does an astronaut do when it gets dirty? He takes a meteor shower. Okay, okay. So there is a riddle where meteor shower is the answer.

But this one is about a bath? What kind of bath does the mad scientist take without water? Okay, and I want to talk to you for a second here, Adel. Yeah. Meteor showers are a really bad answer to what kind of bath. I mean, we have to admit that. Yeah, um... A shower is not a bath. You know this.

I really fucked myself. I know this. A shower is not a bath. I mean, you know a shower is not a bath. Washing this. I really fucked myself. I know this, a shower's not a bath. I mean, you know a shower's not a bath. Washing your hands is not a shower. Hold on, let's not get crazy. Aaron, you hear this? These are the animals that fart the most. Cows, termites, cockroaches, horses, elephants, and rhinos. What was the first one?

Adults. Cows. Oh no. Seals, zebras, baboons, lions, bats and rats. And those are just my exes. These are the animals that fart the most. Fart the most. Fart the most.

When I bet $10,000 that sharks do fart, I took a real bath on that. Is the answer something like somebody taking a bath on something? It's a sudden bath. Oh What's an astronaut's favorite meal? Wait, wait, wait, wait Why not understand that one? What does that mean sunbathing? But they're using the the present tense Sun bath thing Do they what does anyone even call it sunbathing anymore? I guess so. What's an astronaut's favorite meal?

Chicken. Astronaut ice cream or tang, I guess. Well, it could be both, because tang is a drink and astronaut ice cream is a entree. Astronaut. Yes, Erin. It's an astronaut who asks questions. They don't pretend to be a know-it-all.

Not like when you went to space and said, mission control said, Erin, do you know how to fire the rockets? And you go, yeah, I got it. Go, how did you get this number? You're obsessed with me, leave me alone. I do wanna see a scene. All the astronauts in a briefing

and like Erin keeps asking questions. I'm like, we'll check out the ask or not over here. I do wanna see the scene. Aaron, you are someone who, it's almost like a catch me if you can situation where you've just bullshitted your way into becoming an astronaut. Cool.

You're about to, you're at the control panel in the ship that's about to head into space. JPC, you are sort of Houston or control tower. They have control towers for space ships, right? And you were sort of talking Erin through the blast off, but Erin thinks she has it when she doesn't. Okay, I'm just gonna count us back down from... Sorry, sorry, just give me a second. I'm watching a YouTube tutorial on how to

get to space. I can't like listen to two things at once. Wait, why would you watch? Wait, hold on. Why are you watching this? Sorry, there's an ad. There's an ad. There's always an ad. You shouldn't be getting WiFi in here. Okay, let's see. You shouldn't be getting WiFi in here at all. Hmm.

You're the navigator. Buckle your seatbelt, great start. Now what? Let's figure out what these buttons mean. They buckled the seatbelts when they put us in here. I know, I'm just saying. I'm just telling you what the YouTube video says how are you how are you even manipulating a phone

here we're in our suits you're about to go to space sorry this is exhausting I'm trying to red button stop green but now hold on I'm gonna where's the abort button I'm gonna abort the mission. Oh, I'll get up Where is the abort button? I know where the abort button is. I'm just having trouble. Oh, there's an ad That's a lot of fun. That is a lot of fun and Domino's three for one pizza We're staying we're staying three for one scene How is Domino's making money on three for one? That's insane. Casey.

Casey. If that is your real name. How are you? Casey, my friend. You're feeling abandoned? We weren't really chatting with you that much in the last 30 minutes. Are you doing okay?

I've just been smiling and enjoying the ride of this app. Little pervert. Little pervert energy. Pervert pervert. A little pervert. Pervert stuff, right guys? Jesus Christ. Jesus, his camera's off? What's going on? He didn't hear that.

Casey, can we have a voicemail theme if it's not too much trouble? His ass just smiling over there. Right, thank you. Fucking a canoe. Ugh! Hey, Riddleriddle. Ain't that that Riddle podcast with Aaron?

Eddl and JPC the worst of all. Hey Riddle, Riddle, call and leave a voicemail at 805. Riddle 1, hey, Riddle yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,

yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, sister wants to help someone propose to their girlfriend in Indianapolis. And they said no?

No, they said yes. But a friend of mine was like, hey, everyone's doing this. Do you want to do this? And I was like, I guess so. I didn't even know the song. And then years later, I was on an improv team with the woman who got proposed to. And I was like, I was at your proposal. We had never met before.

That's so funny. Yeah. Who sings the original? Train. We had never met before. That's so funny. Yeah. Who sings the original version? Train. Train, that's right. And can we hear a voicemail, please, Casey? Hi, Adel. Hi, Erin.

Hi, JPC. My name is Spider, and I have an important question for you. I currently have two Hey Riddle Riddle tattoos. One is a sad Pezbot. The other is a rainbow HRR with a banner that says chaos in front of it. And I was wondering since we're almost at episode 300, what should my third Hey Riddle Riddle tattoo be? I have a lot of leg space left to cover. Thanks, bye. Whoa. Let's just pretend like this one isn't like a

year old either. Yeah, oh my God. That's amazing that you got two, hey Riddle tattoos already, that's incredible. I think maybe the third one should be a, I wanna say a farting shark, is that? That's so crazy. Is that insane? Yeah, that's, that's astro nuts.

You could get Lil' Monkey Bones, you could get Dr. Chameleon, you could get JP Riddles In a raccoon playing cards, but cards or condoms or something Maybe down your leg. It says what's the big idea? Yeah, maybe your leg says the tuna 15 with a little tuna. Yeah Maybe I would get a teachers lounge podcast podcast. Check out teacher's lounge. They say really funny shit over there.

They're always up to something. Yeah, get one that says the lunatic and the lighthouse from the teacher's lounge. Teaching chong, teaching chong? I didn't know anyone had a Hey Riddle Riddle tattoo. I knew that people had tattoos from our time on Dungeons and Daddies, the, what is it called? Flight risk. Flight risk.

Flight risk or whatever. I've seen those tattoos. I didn't know anyone else. No. Addle, you have a favorite O'Riddle tattoo. I have one. I think Aaron Keefe, I think it was Aaron, Keefe had a thing that was J.J. made of hay, couldn't go to the bonfire. So I thought that was the best thing and I got that tattoo. I think, you know, get the tattoo that speaks to you. If you've got a favorite moment, I mean, that's the one. Because it's all going to be inscrutable to anyone else. No one's ever

going to know what Puzzbot is. So it's like, you know, do the thing that makes you happy. And I believe they said that their name was Spider. So if you're running out of leg space for this tattoo, we got seven more legs, you know? So now I have a piece. Now I know why JPC pulled this voicemail. That's real. You wanted to make that joke.

Is that too? Well, Adil, anything to plug. I want to plug getting a Hey Riddle Riddle tattoo. Do it. Life is short. Ruin your skin with our podcast. Life is short, ruin it your skin with our podcast. Life is short, ruin it, should be our tagline.

And of course I'm joking because I myself have a Hey Riddle, Riddle tattoo. I wanna plug our Patreon, which I think has some delightful content. So check out patreon.com slash heyriddleriddle. We have a lot of content you can catch up on and we have new stuff every week, so check that out. Erin, do you have anything to plug or promote?

Follow Quality Time on Instagram. It's a monthly show I host in Los Angeles if you're interested in that sort of thing. Also, there's a show in LA that is on Thursdays called The Mandatory Improv Show. And it's hosted by Chicago people and a lot of the times a lot of Chicago people play but the quality and the consistency of shows I've seen there over the last few months

is just so good so if you're looking to see an improv show it's very affordable on Thursdays at like seven come check it out come say hi it's a lot of fun. I know Erin met improvisers but I just like saw like yeah Blagojevich and Rahm Emanuel So fucking their TJ and Dave in down JPC do you have a review to read or plug? Yeah. Yeah, let's let's read a review If you want to submit a review just submit it anywhere you submit five star reviews if you make it five stars I might read it on the podcast. This one's called three things This is really a review for the clue crew patreon but I'm doing it here. This summer I had a bit of a minty B and could only listen

to three things without crying for two weeks all I listened to with the following three things. The wet wet waters episode of the patreon, JBC's guided meditation and Dracula by Rob Zombie played on a volume unfit for human consumption. All this to say, by the guided meditation pack, you won't regret it, Ellen from Hangum, we had the same fourth grade teacher. Hey Ellen, no we didn't. I didn't go to school at Hangum. I don't even fucking know you.

My fourth grade teacher was the same as my third grade teacher, because I was in multi-age. So there were third and fourth graders in my class. You got held back. Oh class. You got held back. Oh boy. You got held back and you're just now realizing it. Also, I wonder how they know. Yeah, and Aaron, guess what?

You're still being held back by via JPC. That feels right. That feels right. Wait a minute. That's crazy. Then we went to the same elementary school. That's nutso. Does that mean we live in the same neighborhood? That's crazy.

Aaron, we didn't. I don't even know you like that. Alright, whatever. Jupiter, goodbye! Hey there, boats and balls! If you liked that, you are going to love this week's Patreon episode. It's another ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-chatterbox! Instead of the end, because we have a big announcement. You can listen to that plus our entire back catalog by going to patreon.com slash heyrattlerattle and joining the clue crew for $5 a month or start your 7-day free trial, or the review

crew for $8 a month, plus you get those ad-free episodes. See you there! That was a hategum podcast.