rSlash - r/Relationships My Boyfriend is Jealous of My Fish

Episode Date: March 25, 2026

0:00 Intro 0:07 Jealous of a fish 1:36 Bathroom schedule 6:55 Over eating 11:06 Affair 14:46 Spiked Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Welcome to R-S-R-R-Lash relationship advice, where O-Pie's boyfriend is extremely jealous of a fish. How can I, a 33-year-old guy, stop making my boyfriend who's 36 jealous of my fish, a four-year-old female? Me and my boyfriend have been together for three years. Everything's been relatively good. Recently, my boyfriend's been getting jealous that I talk more to my fish after work than him. I've had this fish longer than we've been together, and I always talk to my fish after work. Talking to my fish is literally just a way that I decompress after work. I just rant to my fish about things that happen throughout the day.

Usually it's stuff that my boyfriend doesn't want to hear. Usually it's just a 15 to 20 minute one-sided conversation. Over the last two weeks, he's gotten annoyed that immediately after getting home, I usually stand in front of the fish tank and just mostly rant. Today I decided to, instead of ranting to my fish, just sit on the couch and rant to him. And he mostly ignored me and watched TV and even got upset a few times that I was talking about things that didn't matter while watching TV. He doesn't want to listen to me after work or want me talking to my fish. I'm not sure what I'm doing wrong.

I will also say that our relationship has been fine the past two weeks, other than him getting upset. said about me talking to the fish. We still talk to each other about other stuff. He just doesn't want to hear about my workday, and I don't blame him. I wouldn't feel bad, O.P., I also have conversations with my dog, but they usually boil down to, who's a good boy? Our next Reddit post is from Throwaway Desper. My 36-year-old husband poops too much for me to feel comfortable having another baby with him. My husband and I'm sorry, this is a really crazy title. My husband and I have been married for seven years, together for 11. We have a 3.5-year-old. We're having marriage issues for more reasons than I have a character limit or time to write everything down. In short, I feel that he lacks a sense of responsibility

and proactivity in our relationship. I've been harboring so much resentment, especially after our first baby. I'm in therapy to work through it myself. He has a bathroom habit where he poops every morning during our toddlers wake up, breakfast, and drop-off time, every afternoon after lunch, and every evening during bath and bedtime, which precludes him from the hardest and most demanding times of every day. Each bathroom session is an hour long. Edit, maybe he spends half the time pooping, half the time showering. I also know that he can change his timing apparently on command, because when we need to be out and about, he somehow finds a way to do it earlier or later or not go at all, though I don't know how much it affects him. We both work full-time.

I'm 99% the one who wakes up the baby and gets him ready for preschool. My husband may drive the kiddo to school after I've readied him. And I'm the one to get the baby bathed and ready for bed most of the time, unless I wait for my husband, in which case the baby goes to sleep usually later than what I would prefer. He knows that I've been delaying family planning because of uncertainties around work. He's been looking to change his job for the last two years. Now that he's finally stabilized in his new role, and when I bring up the topic of another baby, he always says it depends on me. My son asks for a baby sister because all of his friends have baby sisters. My husband's response is, it depends on mommy, but it doesn't. The issues I have with my husband

from our first baby are still unresolved, and I don't see how I can manage two kids while he's gone for the most busy times of each day. Yes, I also think about if I should even think about having another baby with him. I want to have two kids because we have limited family in the U.S., and I want to make sure my son has someone whose family when he gets older. Let's assume I want to keep this relationship. I asked him to go to the doctor and talk about his frequent bowel movements, and he said he did before, and it's normal.

I feel like he prioritizes himself and his needs before our families, because he seems to be able to adjust when he goes, But as a default, he seemingly chooses the busiest times of the day to do it. When I ask him point blank how we're supposed to have a newborn when he's gone for three hours every day at the most critical times, he said his parents can take care of the baby. His parents live two hours away. That's not a come over and help once in a while situation. This is a multi-year, if not lifelong, daily need that I require from him.

And his first response is, someone else can do it. It makes me so sad and disappointed that this is his first and only solution. I honestly don't know what he can propose, but I wanted to see that this unavailability is a concern of mine and put in some thought. I can't stop him from pooping. It's not like I have the room or the willpower to have his mom live with us for three years to make up for my husband's need to poop. It's not like she wants to live with us for three years either. And this is just one specific concern. There are plenty of other concerns.

Also, for clarifying information, he has hemorrhoids. Okay, I can't believe I have to actually say this. O.P., he's not pooping, he's hiding. He's, you know, scrolling TikTok, watching YouTube videos, chatting with his friends. Maybe he poops some of the time. But no human being on Earth can poop for three hours, can they? Is that even physically possible? Maybe it is, if it is, if any sad, unfortunate souls have experienced this daily torture,

please let me know in the comments. Like, think about the amount of food a person would have to eat to generate three hours of poop. I guess he's majorly constipated. Hey, okay, so here's a fact that I know, not because I've experienced it myself, luckily, but because I heard a funny story about it online. Apparently, sitting on the toilet for a long period of time can lead to hemorrhoids. So maybe if he didn't spend three hours a day putting strain on his legs like that and his butt, he wouldn't have that condition that's causing him so much pain. Also, if you're curious, the funny

story I heard online is that I think I got the names right. I'm sorry if this is the incorrect person. Kevin Smith, the guy who wrote the movie Clerks, he got into the habit of doing a lot of his work on the toilet. So he would just, you know, do his business and then spend an extra 30 minutes tapping away on his phone just because he was focused. And it led to really bad hemorrhoids. And he was talking to his doctor. And the doctor was like, oh yeah, well, that's because you spend so long on the toilet. Poilet pressure on like the legs in the butt can lead to that. Down in the comments, people are saying, this isn't weaponized incompetence. This is weaponized incontinence.

Yeah, okay, everyone in the comments is saying, it's not poop, it's his phone. Yeah, next time he goes to the bathroom, just take his phone from him, say, hey, you know, my phone's dead. I needed to help put the baby to sleep and see how long he really spends in there. Our next credit post is from Throwaway Husband Health. My husband eats so much food, over 10,000 calories a day, and has gotten so obese, and I just don't know what to do anymore. He didn't used to be like this. We got married when we were 25. Now we're 33, and he's gone from around 180 pounds to over 450 pounds. Looking at him fills me with horror and despair. He may as well have been diagnosed with terminal cancer, because his size is going to have the same results sometime in the next 10 years if he doesn't stand. In my heart, I no longer believe my husband will be here by the time I'm 50.

His medical problem so far. A mini stroke from a blood clot, abnormal heart palpitations, emergency room visits both of these times. Extremely high blood pressure. Extremely high cholesterol. Diabetes, inability to walk much, joint pain, lymphedema in one of his legs, sleep apnea and has to wear a CPAP machine at night so he literally won't die from not breathing. Five different medications that I manage the schedule. of or he wouldn't remember or not care or didn't know. His diet is fast food. McDonald's,

Burger King, Local Chinese joints, Taco Bell, KFC, Popeyes, Domino's, Dunkin' Donuts, Chick-fil-A, Pizza Hut, Arbys. Also, he gets all of this delivered from Uber Eats whenever he feels like it, which is at least once a day. He even does it in the middle of the night. Everything else is just junk food like chips and other packaged snacks, all sorts of candy, ice cream, baked desserts, frozen and microwave food like breakfast trays and sausages, burritos, Easy Mac, basically anything you could find at a gas station convenience store. All of his meals are full of sugar, frying oil, butter, fat, and grease, just the worst ingredients that are exactly what he needs to stop eating.

We're both work from home right now. I've watched him for a few days this week, keeping a record of everything he ate, that I saw anyways, and then looked up the approximate caloric value of every item. Every single day was at least 10,000 calories. The worst day was a little over 14,000 calories. A sedentary male of his age and height needs around 2,500 a day, just for comparison. I am terrified that I'm going to be burying him,

possibly before we even reach our 50s and get to enjoy old age together. I'm terrified. I'm going to have to see the person I love most in the entire world die from a long, drawn-out, painful accumulation of treatable illnesses. And some days, I wonder if I'm not already watching that in slow motion. I've asked him so many times to please, please eat healthier. He will, he eats the healthy meals I make, but then he still eats junk food after or orders a second fast food dinner. He doesn't get that it's not enough to combat the damage to his body. I've also begged him to go to the doctor. He only goes when something is catastrophically wrong. In fact, most of the more minor problems in that

list were only diagnosed because he happened to be at the emergency room for something major, and they found it. I've begged him to see a doctor for a routine, non-emergency checkup, specifically with the aim of building a support plan for weight loss and a healthier diet. He says he'll do it, then has excuses why he didn't. I've gone ahead and made a couple of appointments for him, and make sure calling people wasn't stressing him out. And then, when the time came, he just never went. Same thing with the therapy appointment. I set it up for him, and he never went. I wondered and still do if there's something like depression at play, and this is the form it takes. But I'll never know if he won't talk to anyone about it. He doesn't even talk to me about what's causing it,

beyond saying that he just likes food and eating makes him happy. I'm reaching a point where I feel like my heart is breaking, like he's leaving me, even though our relationship is as strong as ever. I don't understand it. Why doesn't he care? Also, down in the comments, people are asking how expensive this is. O.P. says they have a combined income of over $100,000, but he spends at least $2,000 a month on fast food, which adds up to $24,000 a year, which is roughly 25% of their household income on McDonald's. Our next credit post is from Miserable Wheel. I'm a 24-year-old woman, and my partner is 25. My partner left home on Tuesday night saying that he was going fishing, and he'd be back at 2 a.m. He was sending me messages all night up until 11.30 on Wednesday morning, where he said that he would call me. I expected a call after that, but I haven't heard back from him since. It's now Saturday noon.

He has literally vanished from my life with no contact. His mom heard from him this morning and confirmed that he's in New Zealand. That's it. He hasn't contacted me. This isn't maybe an affair. It's confirmed. He's with a woman who's about 33 in New Zealand, nearly 10 years. years older than him and who has two young kids. She knew that he was in a long-term committed relationship with me, and I'm positive that he told her I'm pregnant. I asked her weeks ago how long their relationship had been going on, and just to be honest, which she ignored and then deleted her Instagram account. I also asked her on Wednesday on Facebook to tell me that he's safe and she ignored me. From what I can tell, the trip was planned. I've done everything for him, every single thing. I fought for him every day. I've supported him financially, emotionally, physically, tried to help him get a job,

get his license, even helped him apply to work, helped with his mental health. I've cooked, cleaned, held him when he needed it, forgiven him for past mistakes more than anyone in this world would have. I've been with him six years, six years of love, forgiveness, loyalty, and trying to build a life together. All gone for a stranger. He's stepping into a stepdad role for her two kids while avoiding response. for his own flesh and blood. I've forgiven emotional cheating before, but I don't think I can get over the physical betrayal. Over the past month, his drinking has been insane. 12 to 30 drinks a day. He becomes emotionally unstable and has previously threatened self-harm if I leave and had psychotic episodes while drinking. There wasn't even a major fight when he left. He said he'd be back, kissed me, and hugged me, and kept contacting me like we were okay. Logically, I know he's alive, and has left me for another woman. Emotionally, my brain hasn't caught up. I'm still expecting a call.

I'm still expecting him to walk through the door and come back home to me. I'm stuck between accepting that this is complete abandonment, trying to understand if alcohol or mental instability is driving his choices, protecting myself and our baby, and stopping myself from obsessively checking my phone. I don't think I can get over the physical betrayal. I've forgiven emotional cheating multiple times before this, but him leaving me for someone,

else while I'm carrying his child, I can't process it. O.P., uh, geez, you can't process this, but I can. Based on everything you've said in this post, this seems like expected behavior out of this guy. I don't want this to come off as like victim blamey because O.P. seems like a really, you know, committed ride or die person, but you got to wake up, O.P. Why are you with this guy? Does he have any positive attributes whatsoever? He just, seems like a raging alcoholic who is also a liar and cheater and who steps out on his own baby. This guy is a train wreck. This guy is a drunk bum.

Oh, geez. O.P. is also four months pregnant. And they're in Australia, if it matters. O.P., I'm sorry this happened to you, but please wake up and realize that he has ruined your life. And the best thing to do is to cut him out and never talk to him. him again. Our next credit post is from Throwaway Not Drunk. I'm a 21-year-old woman and my boyfriend is 22. He spiked my drink the other night. So my boyfriend and I have been together for about two years now and currently share an apartment in our college town. I don't drink. I don't have a reason or anything.

I just never required a taste for alcohol. I'll take a sip of my boyfriends or friends drank just to try it every now and again, but I usually don't like it. I go to bars with friends and hang out with them all the time, and I'll usually just have a soda or a water and offer to drive if need be. My boyfriend was a little stressed the other day, since he had to work during Black Friday, so he was tired when he came home. We were watching something on Netflix when he gets up and says he's going to make himself a drink. I offered to do it for him, but he just said, no, no, don't worry about it, I'll bring you a water. So he comes back with his drink and a flavored water for me, and when I sipped it, something tasted off about it. I only took a few more sips of it before I just put it on the

coffee table and ignored it. He asked me why I wasn't drinking it, which was kind of a strange question to me. I told him it tasted a little off and maybe I bought a bad case or something. He immediately seems to get frustrated and tells me to just drink it so it won't go to waste. Push came to shove and turns out he put vodka in my water. When I asked him why he would do that without telling me, he said that it was a fantasy of his to have drunken, passionate hugging with me. And it was getting ridiculous that I wouldn't get drunk so that he would do that. He has never communicated this to me before. I had no idea. I dumped my drink out into the sink and then he was angry at me for wasting alcohol. Now I'm scared. He put something in my drink without my knowledge and that scared me. I'm not sure what to do now.

Yeah, this is a never coming back from it situation for me. Any kind of like non-consensual, this is really gross. Ultimately, O.P., if he's this comfortable doing something to your body without your consent, then what else is he willing to do to you without your consent? Also, OP posted an update to say that she dumped him. That was R-slash Relationships. And if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.