Secret Mum Club with Sophiena - The Fart Fart

Episode Date: March 26, 2026

A toddler has been causing chaos at nursery when an innocent “fart fart” turns into something much worse. Plus, Soph shares an update on Dottie’s dyslexia journey as listeners flood in with their own experiences, advice and reassurance. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Wait, hold on. I need your attention because we have some huge news. It's big. Bigger than my bucket crutch. And that's big. Even bigger than Jojo's love for teenage mutant ninja turtles. Well, you've been asking for it, so we're going to be heading back on the stage for another secret mom club lunch show. There's going to be plenty of secrets. Perhaps a couple of party games.

And maybe a few surprise guests. So mark your calendars because on the 20th of May, we'll be live at Bush Hall in London for one girly night only. So you better buckle up, bitches. Tickets are on sale right now. So head to our socials for more info and the link to buy tickets. We can't wait to see you there. Now, back to the episode. So this is The Secret Mum Club.

I'm Safina. And I'm Emma. And welcome to your Thursday's episode. Where we get to squeeze in all the extra bits and bobs from the week. Squeeze your bits, honey. All of your comments, thoughts, questions. and fun stories. To keep you going through the weekend.

Show we jump on in. It's time for another. Correspondence Corner. So Emma, take it away, honey. All right. So we've had loads of you get in touch about Dottie going for her dyslexia assessment. Yes. This one says, hello beautiful ladies.

My name's Bluebell. Oh my gosh. These names, if you listen to last week's episode, these names are coming out. We had a Cleopatra, a Juniper. Stunning. Now a Bluebell. Oh, gosh, you're killing me with these names. It says, I've been a long time listener.

I actually started listening to you while revising for my GCSEs. Oh, Bluebell. And you really got me through those long revision sessions. After hearing Safina talk about Dotty possibly being dyslexic, I wanted to share my experience. At school, I was always told I had amazing ideas but couldn't get them onto paper. I could talk about stories and ideas for hours, but the second I had to write them down, my mind would freeze. It was incredibly frustrating. Luckily, I moved schools in year two and they immediately picked up on it.

They started giving me fun one-to-one spelling, reading, and counting sessions, which helped me massively. For the first time, my work started getting noticed and it felt amazing. My parents were a huge support too. My dad is severely dyslexic and my mum was always helping me and attending meetings with the school. When I moved to secondary school, I was tested and diagnosed with dyslexia and ADHD, which finally made everything makes sense. I received lots of support like extra exam time, blue exam paper and additional learning sessions. Now six years later, I'm 17 and training to be a beauty therapist. I passed all my GCSEs while listening to you guys and I'm really proud of what I achieved.

I hope this brings some comfort with the right support. You really can do anything. Thank you for all the laughs. Oh, it's actually giving me goosebumps. You're going to cry? Yeah, I might do. How lovely is that? That's really lovely.

Oh. And I know, and I know it's okay and I know we're going to be okay. You know, I will salute myself and say that, you know, I got through it. I didn't have the greatest support. I think, like I said in the episode is that I was confused as. to why Roxanne and Ritchie were doing so great. Plus I had Ritchie, who was in exactly the same year as me. In junior school, we were in exactly the same classes.

And I think I just felt really confused because I was in normal circumstances, if there is a child that is maybe standing out or is struggling or is showing signs of anything, it is kind of, you're not really then compared to another child. It may be that, oh, she's writing a little bit faster than her peers, or she's not spelling as well as her peers and so forth. And it's kind of been put at that. But when it was me, that's sorry, that's how Dotty, it's been put with Dotty is comparing her to her peers.

But mine, it was just always so, so hard on the, she doesn't do this, whereas Richie does. She doesn't do that like Richie does. Richie does this, but Safina doesn't do that. And it was like it was so intense. And I just remember the days at school was so fucking long and so fucking hard. and I just felt so isolated. And I just don't know that there was that much support back then. I know there was some, but there wasn't that much support.

And then when I got to secondary school, it was kind of like, oh, she's just the naughty one. She needs to go in the class with the naughty children. And that's, I'm not saying that that's the right terminology for it, but that was how it was. And teachers used to get angry with me and they used to go, oh, you would just have to go in the naughty class then with all the naughty children. Is that what you want? And I used to be like, no. Well, I don't really know what I want. I don't know what I'm doing.

I need some help. I need some support. And it wasn't until my mum and dad got me a private tutor in year 11, which was just an next door neighbour. And when I say private tutor, she just helped me with like reading and spellings and and writing stuff down so that I could just get through my GCSEs. It wasn't a long term thing. It was very short.

But that's when I got my green sheet and I was able to, because everyone has a different colour as to what works best for them. Does that make it easy for you to read the kind of paper? Yeah. So basically how my dyslexia is, is if I, if I, I look at a book and I can read a couple of pages, but then it gets to a point where the book or either have no words on it at all or it just merges into one big black block. And I just can't read anything.

I'll just sit there freezing like there's nothing there. And I do it with the children's book sometimes, maybe when I'm a little bit tired. But if I put a laminated green sheet over, which I do, when on my emails, I have a green screen, which is an app. You pick your colour. So it's basically an app you download for dyslexia. you can pick a colour and it will change the screen colour of your screen. Oh, interesting.

So when I'm reading contracts with work and when I'm reading long emails, I can change the colour of the screen so that it doesn't all blur because it doesn't have to be on a bit of paper. It'll just blur into one colour. Yeah. But yeah. That's, I mean, yeah. But it's been a learning curve for me in the fact that I've had to kind of... Well, just work out for yourself.

Yeah. Self taught. So I'm really grateful that the school I've picked it up. And we've had the confirmation through. because we had to give... She had the test? I keep asking, but I think the schooler notified me. I don't think they're wanting to make a big deal out of it for her,

but I had to give a consent form to basically say that we allow her to do that. And that form got handed in last week. So they're acting quickly on it because we don't really have that much long left. We're just gone into March and they break up in July. And we got a few holidays in the meantime, the Easter holiday, May holiday. So they are actively pushing it, which I'm, I'm. I'm really incredibly grateful for. But yeah, the scourges aren't going to make a big deal about it.

I haven't personally spoken to her about it. I bought silly things like at home. Both babies really love to write a story. Colby and Dottie love writing and they make little books where they sell a tape. Oh, that's cute. We used to do that. Yeah, I know. And it's really nice.

They love doing that. And so I bought her a lined pad so that she can use line paper to try and, and we are having times where we slow down and we do do some writing. because our chill time is colouring. So we're trying to change our chill time into, why don't we write a story? And just exactly like Bluebell has said is that she's got so, she's got such a huge, massive imagination. When it comes to pen to paper, she'll either really, really rush through her or she just kind of is like, can you write it?

If I tell you, can you write it down? So I knew the signs were there. I could see the signs and I'd notice them at home because it's exactly how I remember being when I was her age. So there is things that we're trying to do at home, but it feels really lovely when people come through and have their own experiences. Yeah. What a positive experience for Bluebell. Yes. And congratulations on your GCSEs. You absolute rock star. And thank you for being here. That seems really flattering. I know. She's 17 and she's so young. We've got the youth guys. We've got the youth audience. We've got the boys and the youths and obviously all the girlies.

Thanks, Bluebell. But thank you so much. All right. This one says, Hey girls, I was listening to the episode where Sov spoke about Dottie and dyslexia and it really resonated with me as a mum. My daughter, Esme, is in year four and also has dyslexia. I actually had to get her privately diagnosed because I'd been raising concerns with her school since year one and they never acknowledged it properly. But I finally managed to secure her a place at a specialist dyslexia school where she'll get the support she deserves and can really flourish. Hearing you talk about Dottie meant a lot because dyslexia really can be a superpower. These children are incredibly creative and see the world in such a unique way. I also just wanted to say how amazing it is that Dottie's school recognized her needs so early.

That kind of support from teachers is absolutely priceless. I love the podcast so much. Thank you for being so open and real, Ruth from Surrey. Oh, my gosh. That is a hard one, isn't it? Year four is a tough year. And like Ruth has said, I feel so incredibly great. I'd obviously notice signs, and I did keep checking every parent's evening.

I want people to know that I know I didn't say that in the episode. I have been checking with school and just making sure that she's academic. where she needs to be because they basically get, I don't want to say, ticked in a box, but they either get like underachieving, working as expected, overachieving. I think there's some other ones. I'm not really too sure of the names of them. So when I go into school, my concern isn't about where they are on the chart. It's just, is she, are they at where they need to be at?

Like are they keeping up with reading? Are they keeping up with writing? Are they keeping up with spellings? also are they keeping up with like interactions like how are they in the class setting you know are they staying concentrated are they listening and they're doing as they they should be you know there's a lot and every time I've asked the teachers they've the teacher she's always been like yep she's where she needs to be and I would say it's this year has been the most testing and I don't know whether it's because she has struggled with friendships and that has impacted her which again the school have been great to keep me up on that but obviously I've started noticing things at home so when I go to school I'm I'm like, we are writing at home, but I just need to check. Is her writing okay here? We're spelling at home. So I have, I've picked up and noticed triggers at home,

but I'm so incredibly grateful for the schoolers. Because junior school is scary. I'm scared for her to go into junior school. Yeah, that's next year, isn't it? Yeah, yeah. We're waiting on the placement, which is in April as well. Their placements, if they get in. So, yeah, fingers crossed.

And I'm sorry you had to go through with that where there's made, but that sounds so wonderful. I know. I didn't know there was a specialist school you could go to. So we, I think we have one in Southampton. I can't think what the name of it is, but I'm pretty sure. It might be a couple in Southampton, but obviously only one that I specifically know of. Yeah.

But yeah, it's, I love that the support is there to help them. Yeah. Because it is something that is, it's kind of one of those that I, only me personally feel like it's a bit brushed under the carpet. It's kind of like, God, what are you, dyslexic? And you're like, well, yeah, actually I am. And they're like, well, what's that got to do with this? And actually, it impacts. It impacts my life massively. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it's really, really huge. And as much as it is kind of the one that says, while we spell in dyslexia like that, because it's, I can't spell, you know, it's silly things like that. But it's kind of one of those that's not actually spoken about unless you've either gone, going through it or you live with it or you have a child that's experience in it. It's kind of one of those. It's just like, oh, well. It's not that big a deal. Oh, they can't write. Okay, they can't spell. Oh, God, they're not very good at reading or listening or sitting still or doing is their.

That's basically the hold of school though, so it's massive. But that's, that's with your whole entire life, though, because then when I went to them work and I had to work in an office, well, not I had to, but my choice was to work in an office after I left my dads and I wasn't on site anymore. I went in sat in an office with hundreds of people and noise would be a lot because I'd find that if I was in the midst of writing something or writing an email, it would get really loud. And then I'd be like, oh, fuck. Okay. And then I'd write a word and I'd be like, fuck, not even. autocorrect can pick it up. So then I'd have to go back and change the amount of times I've gone through an email and I've had to change the whole paragraph as to what I wanted to say, because not

even autocorrect can pick up what word I'm trying to say. Or the amount of times I say to Chris, oh God, how'd you spell this word? Because the autocorrect's not picking it up. But even in an office setting, I used to really, really struggle on it. It's things you have to learn and deal with. And like, when I first got the job, I didn't tell them. But it got to the point where I was like, I need some help in my place of work. And that was at 19. And was I embarrassed? Absolutely fucking not. No, I need help. I'm incredible at my job. I know I'm amazing at my job. But I need you to help me because I'm really struggling. And again, the workplace were phenomenal. But I just feel like sometimes it's one of those. Either people really take it seriously because it's there every day or people, it's a bit of a joke. And that's only, that's just, that's only me personally. I'm not speaking for anybody and I'm not saying anybody's right or wrong. But it just seems one of those is just a bit. Yeah. I love that Ruth's reframed it as well. She's like, it's a positive thing. It's a superpower. Her daughter's unique. It's not like, it's not bad thing. I don't know that I would

achieved what I'd achieved if I hadn't, if I wasn't dyslexic. No, no, no, because it's given me a confidence. I never would have ever had. If I was, you know, incredible at spelling, incredible at reading, incredible at writing, if I was incredible all of these things, I would just be plodding on through life but I've had to, it is a superpower, I've had to, I've had to find other ways to sell myself. So if I'm going for a job interview, I'm, I'm selling myself on that I'm a really fucking great person and I'm an asset to the business and I work fucking hard. Yeah, I might not be able to spell very great nor write a very good email, but I'm a really fucking good person. And I think that makes you like a dog with senses. I feel like it,

it heightens other things, you know? Yeah. Yeah. Look at you. Look at you. I'm selling my. I yourself. But no, I love that, Ruth. Thank you so much. And we really hope Esme is doing fantastic and flourishing in school. That's wonderful to hear. All right. One last message here. It says, hi, Soph and Emma. I wanted to say how much Sophie's situation with Dottie resonated with me. I have severe dyslexia too, and I wasn't diagnosed until I was 18. At school, I was often told I was slow. I wouldn't achieve anything. And those words really say with you. But despite that, I'm now in the final year of my master's degree in occupational therapy. I bought my first home at 21 and I'm raising two little ones with a third on the way.

So whatever Dotty's diagnosis ends up being, she can absolutely achieve anything. And she already has the most important thing, parents who understand her and support her. Sending lots of love, Abby. Fucking hell. And you're going. You're going. You're going. This is what I mean.

It's just, it's not something that stops anybody. And as much as you know, I'm really grateful for the school. And regardless of whether she got tested or diagnosed or not diagnosed, it just, it doesn't, it, obviously does make a difference because having a diagnosis for dyslexia will massively help her in school. And I think that's what's the most important thing. But I know it's not going to change anything in the fact that yes, she's going to get the support and help she needs. But it's not it's not something to be scared of or embarrassed of. It's just it's just a part of you.

And I think that little bit that makes us all different is what's beautiful about humans. Because if we're all the same. How boring. The world will be a boring place. Yeah. We're smashing it. Abby, that is honestly, wow. Just I love hearing these stories about people like doing so well and just like turning their.

It really blows my mind. Turning it into such a positive. She's doing a masters. She's having a third baby. She's pregnant. She's got two little ones already. What a fucking woman. She bought a first time at 21.

I mean, come on. Come on, girlie pops. Come on. That's phenomenal. Well, thank you all so much. Honestly, I can't tell you how much it means. It's incredible. So thank you for your messages.

If you have any comments, thoughts or funny stories, why not get in touch? You can email us. Hello at secret mumpod.com or we're Secret MumPod on TikTok and Instagram. Next, it's time for one of your... Secret. Welcome back. And we love a secret on the Secret Mum Club. And you're all so good at sharing.

So Emma, what have you got for us today? All right, this comes from Jenny from Surrey. Hello, Jenny. He says, hello beautiful ladies. I've been waiting for a reason to write in. And this week, something happened that I knew would make you laugh. Oh my gosh. A couple of weeks ago, I got pulled aside.

nursery pickup and was told my two and a half year old had been running around saying fat fuck. I was so expecting. You weren't ready. I immediately said, oh gosh, I'll have a word. We don't even use the word fat at home. She didn't say anything about fuck. Fuck's a prime word in our house.

Fat, no, no. Fast forward a couple of weeks and my husband calls me at work. He asked our daughter to tell me. Oh, I thought it was because my husband called me at work. Come on, fat fuck. Oh God. Say fuck me. I called her on the phone. Yeah.

He asked our daughter to tell me what she'd been saying. And again, she shouts, fat fuck, fat fuck. I was horrified until he explained what she was actually trying to say. Apparently, she'd farted and had been running around shouting, fart, fart, fart. For your entertainment, I've attached a voice note. Oh, there's a clip. Oh, my God. I'm so excited. Can you say, fart, fart?

Fat, fat. And again? Fat, fat. Oh, it doesn't sound like fart at all. It doesn't sound like fart. It sounds like fat fuck. It's the intonation as well. Fart, fat fuck.

It sounds... The first time she was really giving it like, fat, fat. And then the second time was like, fat fuck. I thought we were going to go like fat fart. I don't even know. Can I just say this is why far is a banned word in my house. Oh, gosh.

Can you just imagine it? Another fall air F word. It's like the time Colby just ran out from the toilet at nursery, fully naked and he just walked into the room, no nappy on, into the room at preschool. And he was just like, hey, Carol, babe. Hey Carol, babe. No.

And she was like, when he was he naked, he did call me Carol Babe. Babe. Carol, Babe. Babe. He used to say, Carol, babe. Sit down with me. And I'm sorry, Carol, I don't know why he's calling you Babe. But he would say, just entered the room and he's like, Carol, babe, fully naked.

And I just remember her telling me, oh, Colby did come out of the toilet, say, fully naked into the nursery room. There was a lot of commotion. Everyone was screaming, didn't know what to do. But he also followed it with Carol Babe. Oh, right. Okay. I'm sorry. Sorry about that.

What did you mean? I don't know. I don't know where he got the baby. Carol Bay. Babe stayed with us for a really long time. Everyone was babe. All right, mum, babe. Did you get that from you and Chris?

Maybe Chris used to say babe. It doesn't know more. It just obviously says mum. Yeah. Now we're just mum and dad. Me and Stefan say babe. And I think other people find it really cringe. But it's so natural to me because my family have always said it.

Like my mum and dad call us Babe. Is that weird? Be like, babe, do this or babe do that. So for me it's so normal. But sometimes when I say it around people that clearly aren't baby people, I'm like, wow, that sounds really weird. It's like when Chris calls me and it comes up daddy on my phone. And I'm on the train.

I do think that was weird. Yeah, that was. No, we say mommy and daddy. In front of the children. Like, we refer to the children. In front of the children we do. Yeah. Not in the, like the children all go to bed.

Mommy, do you want a cup of tea? Daddy. No, no. Yeah, but he's not. I just say, all right, dickhead, put the kettle on. No, I don't. Stephanie, my phone is still Stefan Powell. How authoritative.

Just in case. Just in case you, anything happens. That's actually good. Yes. Because what are they going to ring? Daddy. Who's your next of kin? Hello.

Is this daddy? Daddy. Is that daddy? Daddy. So what's your actual name? It does come up Chris slash Daddy. So the children know to ring Chris. That is clever.

But obviously now Cobby's 10. They now know his name's 10. But when they weren't and they were little, we knew DADDY's. They could recognise it. They could recognise it to ring. It's smart. Yeah. Oh, thanks Jenny.

That made me so incredibly happy. Are you getting down with the trumpets with your fat farts? Then let us know. Email us hello at secret mumpod.com or with SecretMumPod on TikTok and Instagram. And we'll be back first thing on Tuesday. We'll have more of your messages on our next Thursday episode. And we'll see you next time on the Secret Mum Club!