The Bechdel Cast - 40 Days and 40 Nights with Arielle Isaac Norman

Episode Date: April 18, 2019

Caitlin and Jamie discussed 40 Days and 40 Nights with special guest Arielle Isaac Norman, and they were all inspired to give up the patriarchy...forever.(This episode contains spoilers)For Bechdel bonuses, sign up for our Patreon at patreon.com/bechdelcast.Follow @pooptampon on Twitter.  While you're there, you should also follow @BechdelCast, @caitlindurante and @jamieloftusHELP Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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You can listen to Sniffy's Cruising Confessions, sponsored by Gilead, now on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. New episodes every Thursday. On the Bechdelcast, the questions asked if movies have women in them. Are all their discussions just boyfriends and husbands or do they have individualism? The patriarchy's effing vast. Start changing it with the Bechdelcast. Welcome to the Bechdelcast. My name is Jamie Loftus. My name is Caitlin Durante. And this is our podcast where we explore the role of women in movies. Wow. Caitlin, I have a question for you. Okay. Yeah. Can you imagine a world in which not having sex for 40 days is actually difficult and not just how your life is? The whole,

we're talking about 40 days of 49 days. I was like i've gone without having sex for 40 days like in i can't count how i'm pretty sure i've gone 40 months right so it's oh god imagine having bangs like josh hartnett and yet people need to fuck you i, this is a feminist podcast. We use the Bechdel test. Jesus Christ, I want to go home. Okay, we use the Bechdel test as our jumping off point. It's a media test invented by cartoonist Alison Bechdel that asks of a piece of media that there be two female identifying characters, they have to have names, who talk about something other than a man for exactly two lines of dialogue. And boy, do we have a humdinger today. This movie was Caitlin's idea. It was my idea.

Because it's Lent. It's Lent. So this is our Easter episode. For all you Easter heads out there. Sorry for everyone who wants to do Passion of the Christ. You'll have to wait another year. This year it's 40 days and 40 nights. Well, last year we did Shakala as our bonus episode.

Oh, yeah. I guess we have been pretty Christian about celebrating Easter on the Bechtel gas. Which is crazy because I'm not Christian. Nor am I. We tried out like three religions and then gave up. It was like baptized Catholic. first communion was protestant we briefly were wiccan and then we're just like we're gonna just sleep on weekends and that'll be more of our vibe anyways for okay so we're doing the movie 40 days and 40 nights should we just get into it i feel like i can't not i know so let's introduce

our guests yes i was like am i allowed to talk or do I have to wait? Because I have so much to say about this horrible movie. There's so much. Our guest today, a comedian. You've seen her at Moon Tower and Laughing Skull Comedy Festivals. She is the host of Gender Fluids podcast. It's Ariel Isaac Norman. Hey.

Thanks for coming on. Sorry that we made you. Sorry that you had to watch this movie. No, I'd never seen it before, and this was the perfect opportunity to finally see it. Right on. Can I tell you that when I was a kid, I didn't see this movie, and I remember it coming out. I mean, a kid. I guess I was 17, because I was a Mormon, and we weren't allowed to watch movies like this.

Oh. No R-rated movies, which I think it's... It has to be R. Yeah. Yeah. But I remember like looking at the cover of it, like with the hairdryer and like wanting to watch this movie. I remember thinking that looks really hot.

Oh, he has to resist sex. I remember being like, man, cause I was a sexual child, you know, but like, you know, not having sex,

but just very sexual child. So I remember just being like, man, I wish I could watch that movie one day when i'm an adult well and now i have so what i meant to say was you're welcome you're welcome yeah we gave you this opportunity and it was major it was illuminating life-changing caitlin what's your experience with this movie i saw it when it first came out in 2002 i was also i was like 15 or 16 not a movie that i enjoyed by any stretch of the imagination upon re-watching it to prep for the episode i realized that the only thing i remembered about it was the scene where he fakes his orgasm toward the beginning and then the progressive meg ryan oh sure yeah that's what i screamed at my roku tv last night and then um the scene where he is like dumping ice onto his bonar i remembered

that scene as well but everything else i had like forgotten bonar imagery but i feel like this is like one of the last movies of that sub-genre of like teen young adult type movies where people place sex bets because we've got our cruel intentions our 10 things i think it reaches its peak in like 99 2000 yeah but this is the last one the tail end of it the denouement of This is when it jumped the shark. We gotta bring it back. Bring back the sinister sex bet. So yeah, that's my history. And I, yeah, I'm sorry that

I was like, yeah, let's do this for our Easter time episode. And I don't know why I thought it would be a good idea. I think we're all gonna have a great time. My history with this movie, I texted Caitlin as I was watching it last night. I thought this was I was like

nine when this movie came out, so I definitely didn't see it. I don't know how much of a cultural legacy this movie really has, because I didn't know anything about it. When you said 40 Days and 40 Nights, I was like, oh, that's I think a movie about the Bible. And I thought Josh Hartnett was in a biblical oh epic they did put him in too many movies back then but

i was like yeah i was like ready for and i think i sort of had it confused with six days seven nights but i don't know what that's about either so i maybe i wasn't confused but i thought it was like josh hartnett is playing like the Technicolor Dreamcoat. I thought it was going to be a movie about the Bible. Here's what you texted me. Okay, so next message. I thought... 40 Days and 40 Nights was a dystopian movie about the Bible.

Next message. It is, actually. Dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot. It's not. It's so weird. And then you find out it's about San Francisco. It's like the- Tech bros.

Tech bro chode. 2002, working in a warehouse with terrible lighting and abusing women. So you're just- I was not ready for this movie, and I'm angry I had to watch it. I know. This is my bad everybody it took me three this movie is fairly short it's like it's an hour and a half but so much happened that is crazy that i it took me three hours to watch the movie because i had to keep pausing

it and taking notes because it was every two seconds you're like hold on let's try to unpack this and then like there's just so much yeah oh and then uh ariel you had not seen this you just watched it for the for the first time yes yeah i watched it with my new girlfriend we had a great and she hadn't seen it either she was quite young when it came out so yeah we had a great time watching this i mean you know we got quite high and we're like i thought it was going to be a very boringly bad movie. It is not a boringly bad movie. It's a mind blowingly bad movie. This is the epitome.

If you want to know what problematic means, just any scene in this movie is like, dear God. And it may, cause if you'd watch any movies from back then, it's like, Oh God, we were pretty homophobic.

We were pretty just like letting things oh yeah but this movie takes i'm like is was everything this bad i values this feels like a little worse than even normal and normal was bad but this feels slightly worse i think it's because in those other sex bet movies they're teenagers and these people are like post-college so it's like they're a little raunchier they're a little more adult they are actually like fucking by this point in their lives there were multiple points in this movie where i'm like where are the parents these kids are out of control they're they're 24 they don't need parents oh god it should be illegal

this is like one of the more paranoid movies i've ever seen too of like it seems like the leading character is like struggling with mental illness yeah right like is hallucinating constantly and everyone's like you're just horny and then they make him sign up for the nofap reddit board essentially prior to the nofap reddit board existing the no fap parallels i've i've got i mean i've got everyone covered he does become a vol sell he's vol selling a vol a vol in voluntary celibate okay yeah all cells he knows for 40 days for 40 days which but like the culture of no fap is like it's a reddit board where people mostly men but sometimes i'm gonna join you know yeah i i did join i masturbate a lot like this would be hard for me to do this it's it's like

basically men convincing like they're like i'm not gonna the the longer i go without masturbating i will become a superhuman yeah basically and they're like i'll become like all my problems will be resolved some people seem to get a lot out of it. The way the board is run is very strange where it's like you lead with a number in parentheses and that's how long you've gone without coming. Like how many days? Yes. Yes. And so like there's people that are just starting and they're like, oh, this is great.

I used to have a stand up joke about it because it's so I tried to infiltrate the boards. But there's people who have like not fapped in years and they're like treated with such reverence. That's tight. And they're just like, ever since I stopped coming, I got promoted at work. Like it seems to vastly improve their lives. Dude, more men should stop coming. This is great. But then other ones get like up in the hundreds and like oh they're like basically murderers yeah so it's helping them focus their murderous right

they're like now i have time to watch scary videos on youtube and like make scary plans yeah so there's a lot this is just like very proto nofap yeah so i remember i took an improv class once and the thing that i remember most is that on our performance night, they said that if you have to pee just a little bit, it makes you more creative. And I went ahead and didn't pee before going on. And I did great. So I know. So I've always thought. I love that.

So I think about that sometimes. If I ever have to pee and I'm going on stage pretty soon, I'll just be like, all right, let's just use that energy. So I wonder if it's a similar thing if your balls are just a little full you're just a little on edge it makes you a little bit more creative and focused and everything because it's like there's a part of your body that's like trying to find a restroom there's like a sense of urgency a sense of urgency that kind of like translates and you're like if i just finish this thing then i can go be same thing with when i ran track in high school they're like if you have to pee before a race don't like don't pee while you're running that's what the cool people do yeah i know you're serious and the people behind you

will slow down they're like oh no i get yeah and then you win so it works out well it's yeah can we talk first of all i mean as y', y'all sleep with penis people. Unfortunately. I feel sorry for all of you. From what I hear, it's mostly bad. But how abnormal do you think it is for a man to go 40 days without sex? Probably they're never doing that about masturbating unless they're Mormons or it's something. Right. I think I know a lot of men who regularly go at least 40 days if not a lot longer

without sex but i think they're jerking off at least three times a day right it's the jerking off thing is i think the the thing because it's like basically all of my male friends don't get never fuck a lot of my boyfriends rarely fuck um so but i think it's yeah the masturbation thing which is weird because it's like that's not really the route this movie takes. This movie takes instead that all women are determined to fuck an awkward looking Josh Hartnett. That's my favorite part. Because, yeah, they explicitly, well, how do we shoot? It's so weird to know how to start with this movie.

Right. Well, let me do the recap. Yeah. And then we'll jump in. So we meet Matt. josh hartnett oh my god there i one of the most relatable like things in this movie i'm like who hasn't known two random dudes named matt and ryan who have a codependent friendship and they hate women like that that is eternal right so matt was in a relationship with a woman named nicole who dumps him off screen and was the teen from hocus pocus correct yes so since then he has been having sex with a bunch of women but he feels very empty after each encounter and there's one

scene where he's with a woman and he has to fake an orgasm and he hallucinates yeah ceilings are cracking um and he's going to his brother who is like a priest in training to be like what's wrong with me and his brother is just like you're an idiot. And he's like, oh. So he finds out that his ex-girlfriend, Nicole, has gotten engaged. To a rich, handsome man. Right. But mostly rich.

And then he goes to his brother, the priest in training, for advice. And then he gets the idea to give up sex for Lent because it's the first day of L and he's like oh i'll just go without sex without masturbation without any sexual intimacy for 40 days in an attempt to grow as a person and try to get over nicole sure which is it doesn't address a lot of the problems that he's having right like he clearly needs therapy but he's trying to better himself. But he's trying. Yeah, that part I was like, this is not the worst thing to do. Everything else that happens is the worst thing. Yeah. So it's day one.

He gets rid of all of his porn in Victoria's Secret catalogs and any lube-like substance. Very 2002 approach to porn. Also, I'm like, you're a tech guy. What's with all this analog porn you got? It was a different time. Yeah. And then he goes to a laundromat because his roommate's like, his roommate Ryan, who fucking

sucks. Ryan. He's like, let's go out and meet chicks. And he's like, no, I have laundry to do. There's that scene in the bathroom where Matt has just had a severe panic attack during sex and then runs into his friend and his friend is like, get back out there and finish the job. He's just such a fucking gross, just bad writing pervert.

He's building toy cars. He has time to make model cars. That's what they can think of in this. The second he stops coming, he's like, I'm really into trains now, which I have found to be true. So he goes to a laundromat instead of like going out to the club to meet chicks. And there he still meets a cute girl, Shannon Sossaman. Here's the thing. She's not like the other girls.

She's not. She's not. She loves being at the laundromat. She just wants to get to know cute boys at the laundromat. Yeah. She's not scared for her life at the laundromat. She doesn't not make eye contact with anyone at the laundromat like a normal person. She's also extremely unprepared to be there.

She's like, can you make change for me? I don't have anything to read. I need your fabric softener. But that's like a way to be there. She's like, can you make change for me? I don't have anything to read. I need your fabric softener. But that's like a way to meet people. I never carry a lighter so that I have to ask for a lighter. And it's very effective. In that way, you're always sharing whatever you have. So I can see that.

But she should have left one thing at home and had the rest. Now she's just a freeloader. She's done her hair and makeup to go to the laundromat, but not remembered. She's really like forcing herself into Josh Hartnett's space. Indeed. For this scene. And he is trying to be aloof because he sees that she's cute, but he's like, I'm ball selling. Yeah.

She tries to talk to him. He's very like, and then she's like, I'll see you same time next week. Tee he talk to him. He's very like, eh. And then she's like, I'll see you same time next week. Tee hee hee. And he's like, eh. And then we. But he literally doesn't say like a word. Yeah. During the whole.

He refuses to talk to her. Which is, which is interesting because she goes back to that later and she's like, man, that first day we met. I'm like, when he didn't talk to you. It was very strange. I was like, did I forget a part where y'all had a conversation? She acts as if they had this moment of connection and then he but he like reacts to her like what she's saying is like yeah that first day like i was like no that was so

uncomfortable right to what although there is that scene where he has i i do love that there's some good product placement in this movie there's a lot of attention called to the fact that he has a Mr. Bubble t-shirt at one point. I was like, interesting. Mr. Bubble getting in their R-rated comedy time. That's the real analysis I have. Oh, sure. No, that was very good. That's the movie they wanted to be using for their, yeah.

So then Matt's roommate, Ryan, the shitty guy, finds out about Matt's vow of celibacy. And he's just like, what the fuck? Like, guys are meant to come and fuck and jerk off. And you're going against science and da-da-da. And then we cut to a scene where Ryan has told Matt's colleagues at this, like, tech startup or whatever. They literally work at this vague. They're like, like oh this is welcome

to computer.com like that's the company it's an internet company is all they ever say about it right it's a very convenient way for them not to have to explain anything you know they can do whatever they want at this company in terms of the bed it's so it's so okay the art direction for this company it is so dark all the lighting is blue men are always wearing many layers women are practically naked yes it does seem to be very cold in the building though there i was surprised that there were women in tech represented that was nice sure but they were all dressed like barbie dolls they were all violently horny and treated like garbage yes indeed and they all have all these people

who work in this office have a bet going where they put money into a pool and if they bet on the right day that they think that Matt is going to have sex or masturbate then they win all the money in that pool so if someone's like I think he's

gonna fuck on day 23 and they bet correctly they win all the money i also think it's really funny like the the way the internet is treated in this movie is so uncanny valley where like matt has sex with that woman that he fakes the orgasm with and gets to work the next morning and his co-worker is like so heard you faked an orgasm last night and he's and matt's like how do you know that he's like internet was twitter even around like that woman would have had to somehow like how would that woman have even gotten the word out if she wanted to she has a blog or something yeah the zanga so like omnipotent and that comes back later where what's her name erica finds out about the bet

like two seconds later and he's like how did you know she's like internet damn yeah so then matt does not know about this bet at first but the women in the office are actively there's one woman who like at first who sexually harasses him in the workplace to try to like get him to like break his vow uh it doesn't work he goes to the laundromat again the same woman is there shannon sossaman and he introduces himself this time yeah and uh she's like my name's erica he asks her out on a date they go on a bus date and then fun montage that that was supposed to be him being cool and sensitive and interesting it's like he's like where can i definitely not come right like yeah but it's just like why is she just so happy about the whole thing

i don't know but they're having a great time and her character is like god like a manic pixie dream girl is that what we're calling this i think i think that she falls into that category pretty squarely because like her motivations don't make sense she seems determined to fix him for whatever reason she hangs in when it doesn't make sense like yeah she's whimsical enough to enjoy a bus date. She wants a bus date. She loves hanging out at the laundromat. Yeah.

She's just flitting around. She's got a quirky job. She's a cyber nanny. Right. Like Maggie Gyllenhaal, a poorly dressed Maggie Gyllenhaal is her best friend. I lost a notch of respect for Maggie Gyllenhaal in this movie, I got to say. I was bummed. I was like, damn, I hope you bought something nice.

Yeah. Seriously. So they're on their bus date. At the end of the night, she goes to kiss him, but he's like, eee! And he gives her a high five instead because he can't even kiss. He runs away. Yeah, that is against the rules too, right? Yeah, because I guess I would fall under the sexual intimacy category.

Not if it's like a disconnected kiss, you yeah maybe just like little just don't on the cheek okay so then he finds out about the bet at work because they've created a website with there's there's ads and everything on the website and one of them is a porn site that's protected by the cyber nanny company that Erica works for. And Maggie Gyllenhaal does, apparently. Right, right, right. So he rushes over there and everyone's like, hey, there's the abstinence guy. Internet!

That's how we know! And she's all pissed off at him. And she's like, what is this? Some kind of bet not to sleep with me? We'll talk about what she she gets angry about so he's like no no no i like you and then after a few days she decides that she's not mad at him anymore and then they go on another date out to eat but his ex-girlfriend nicole is there with her new fiance this is another very 2002 moment where it's like at this time dating a tech bro was not yet a sign

that like you had a ton of money she had like an old school banker she's got like a dirtbag banker and then he's like oh no i just work at a silicon valley startup i'm such a loser i'm like dude fast forward josh harnett's got billions of dollars and he's like waging wars in foreign countries on Facebook. Yes. Bad. So Matt doesn't deal with seeing his ex-girlfriend well. He catches on fire. And then Erica gets mad at him again for not telling her that he had an ex-girlfriend.

Okay. Cool. So by now it's like kind of midway through. It's like day 20 or 23 or something like that and you know the other guys at work are like hey i'm gonna take a vow of celibacy too because i think that's gonna help me get laid i thought they were just lying that they were doing that to women yeah i mean they were just doing that as a way to get their celibacy was a six hour window but right exactly so then er Erica isn't mad at him anymore again. And now she's actually kind of starting to fall for this guy.

Yeah. And he goes over to her house and makes her come by blowing a flower petal around her crotch. I was like, that was kind of hot. I was really into that scene. I was like, I don't know where all these orchids came from. Yeah. But I did think that scene was pretty hot. There is nothing like

not being able to have sex to make that tension really hot and then if you had the flower petals. I mean that was well done. Sure. I mean visually. Yeah it was a sexy scene. I was like that's something you can do at home with your lover you've already had sex with. If you put an arbitrary restriction on not having sex and then you can get

you can get a lot out of flower petals. I liked that. Just the whole time, I was like, man, I just wish it were different people. But that was a hot scene. Yeah, and then she's like, I'm in love with him. And Maggie Gyllenhaal's like, why? And she's like, I don't know. The movie's almost over.

And then a little bit later, Nicole shows up at his his house his ex-girlfriend and this is like a major shark job okay yeah well she's like my my fiance broke it off let's kiss and he's like no you suck actually and i'm finally realizing that you ruined my life even though we know in the opening shots of the movie that she broke up with him for very good reasons right because he was invading her like privacy and he wasn't listening to her like was being too much and she just like had to break it off but then it's slowly framed it was like you have to go into 2002 brain and be like oh no she's the villain right yeah and then at in the third act they make her oh my god we'll talk about it so he's like get out of here i'm gonna slam the door in your face

and then cut to the final day of the vow nicole goes in and places a bet for 3500 that he will fuck on that day um meanwhile, Matt, he wakes up. He's got a boner the likes of which you've never seen. Oh, my God, yeah, the 40-foot boner that he has. And he's, like, heading to work. He's imagining all the women being naked because he's just so horny by this point. He's withheld from...

He's abstained from sex for so long that it's making him sick. Like, it's making him sick. Like, it's... Yeah, yes. Oh, God. And then at midnight that night, when the vow ends, Erica's supposed to come over so he can, like, finally bust his nut into her, I guess.

God, honestly, after all that, if someone was like, if we did 40 days and 40 nights, I'd be like, please masturbate first. Yes. I don't want this, like, 30-second experience of you, like, please masturbate first. Yes. I don't want this like 30 second experience of you like approaching death. Like, please handle that on your own. Yeah. So he handcuffs himself to his bed so that he won't be tempted to like touch himself.

Like Odysseus and the sirens. Oh, yeah. And then at some point when he's in this like horny-induced daze, Nicole comes back over. Yeah. He's having some kind of dream about a boob world. Boob, yeah. Boob mountains. Which I used to have that dream.

Who among us has not fantasized about a poorly rendered boob world? CGI boobs. So Nicole comes back over and rapes him yeah we'll talk about that scene i had to rewind that three times just to be like now hold on i thought that i was like maybe we get a shot of her entering the house but we don't the audience comes to from boob world with him and he's just been raped by his ex-girlfriend. Yeah. Oh my God. And then I checked.

I was like, there's only like seven minutes left in the movie. Yeah. How could this possibly? So like Nicole and Erica pass each other on the staircase. After post-rape. She's leaving. Yeah. Nicole's leaving.

Erica is arriving. A criminal is leaving. Yeah. A sex criminal is leaving yeah a sex criminal it's fleeing the scene and then who also just insider traded that bet oh yeah which they never address the bet but we'll talk right so insane and Matt is upstairs being like when Erica gets here she's gonna be so mad I got raped yes which she is and she is and he's like i thought that she was you she's like you fucking asshole i thought i was being raped by my girlfriend

instead of my ex right it's great can you believe this movie was made by miramax like it's kind of wild checks out uh she storms out because she irrationally gets mad right and then he has to like figure out what to say to make it up to her and he's like trying to figure out all this stuff and then eventually he just like goes is it they make up in the laundromat right she's doing laundry he comes to the laundromat and he's like what i should have done this whole time is this and then surprise kisses her and then she's like ah i love it and then the movie ends with them fucking for like 47 consecutive hours and then all the tech bros are like at his apartment in the living room just like placing beds he's like oh is he gonna go another hour and he's like you guys are losers

get out of here as far as i know that's a realistic depiction of tech bros yeah so that's the story let's take a quick break and then we will come right back Daphne Caruana Galizia was a Maltese investigative journalist who on October 16, 2017, was murdered. There are crooks everywhere you look now. The situation is desperate. My name is Manuel Delia. I am one of the hosts of Crooks Everywhere, a podcast that unhurts the plot to murder a one-woman Wikileaks.

Daphne exposed the culture of crime and corruption that were turning her beloved country into a mafia state. And she paid the ultimate price. Listen to Crooks Everywhere on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. To listen to new episodes one week early and 100% ad-free, subscribe to the iHeart True Crime Plus channel, available exclusively on Apple Podcasts. Hey everyone, this is Jimmy O'Brien from John Boy Media.

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Come up here and document my project. All you need to do is record everything like you always do. One session, 24 hours. BPM 110, 120. She's terrified. Should we wake her up? Absolutely not. What was that?

You didn't figure it out? I think I need to hear you say it. That was live audio of a woman's nightmare. This machine is approved and everything? You're allowed to be doing this? We passed the review board a year ago. We're not hurting people. There's nothing dangerous about what you're doing.

They're just dreams. Dream Sequence is a new horror thriller from Blumhouse Television, iHeartRadio, and Realm. Listen to Dream Sequence on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. All right, let's get into it. Put your 40-foot boners away. The discourse begins now i still don't understand whether he won or lost the like no i guess i didn't really think about

how did the bet resolve i can't yeah because they don't address anyone when they're still just betting on other stuff but like i'm not sure they never address like hey technically if he gets raped does the bet count? Right. I don't want to know what these tech pros' views on rape are. I just simply don't. Well, the movie doesn't even acknowledge it as rape. It doesn't. Yeah, yeah.

No, I mean, I don't think we're supposed to think of it that way. Right. Which is, you know. But that is 100% what happened. Make no mistake. I think she wins the money. I think Nicole wins the money for raping him. I get it.

I don't see how she wouldn't have. They never address that she placed it. Wow. Yeah. Oh, because she makes a bet last minute. She makes that $3,500 bet and then goes and rapes him, and she must have won. Yeah.

She must have won like $80,000. The odds that they would have given her on the last 12 hours or whatever. I think she's the real billionaire by the end of this. She is a Silicon Valley billionaire. Because she raped a tuck ruff. This movie is so extremely fucked up that I don't... I've never seen a movie that... It's written...

There is this undercurrent in a lot of movies and a lot of attitudes that women are out to get you. They're trying to trick you they're duplicitous uh they're going to try to entrap you they'll use sex to get it that's the only power that they have i've never seen that taken to like an 11 quite in the way that this movie is because every woman in this movie it's almost just like having an irrational fear confirmed of like his fear is that women are out to get him and women are going to, quote unquote, betray him like Nicole did when she broke up with him for a valid reason. Right. And then the way the movie is written, every woman does that and every woman acts like his worst fear and every woman is out to get him. And that's just the logic the movie has is like

you know how you're afraid how women are out to get you they are here's a movie about it like it's just it's because i mean there's like okay i made a list of women out to get josh hartnett in this oh yes it's all of them at different points and then eventually erica at the end not as much but candy the woman who works at computer.com industries photocopies her ass tries to entrap him yes uh nicole who it's first implied is like she's getting married to like spite him everything is a personal like attack on him and then she later rapes him for money erica there's a few moments in the movie where it seems like she's trying to seduce him for her own like needs it's also implied that their relationship is more pure because they don't have sex which is like weird and old school and whatever the women that i don't

know if we ever learn her name but that first hookup that he has um who just like viciously tries to emasculate him by any means necessary in ways that are like crazy which that's the one who's like come with me and then that leads him to fake his orgasm right and she that character set up by being like like she's mean to a waiter yes and she's like this isn't what i wanted and then she insists that he prove that he's come right like just so then he goes and gets some white out he's like i need anything that looks like semen so he's come to like just doesn't. So then he goes and gets some whiteout. He's like I need anything that looks like semen so he's like hmm whiteout and which I guess is probably a joke

but this movie is maybe the least funny attempt at a comedy that I've ever seen. It's what it looks and smells like. Oh yeah yeah yeah. I'm sorry. I actually never need to buy whiteout I just like collect men's cum and I just put it in and I'm like yeah. I mean I do like collect men's cum. Yeah, put it in little bottles. And then like, yeah.

I mean, I do like that you line them like next to your bed so that they can get like moon energy, which is pretty cool. Yeah. Other women who tried to ruin Josh Hart is like the three women at work in that insane scene where they're like, you've taken our power away by withholding sex. Women withhold sex, not you. i was giving the money to chair like the charity can we talk about it goes full conspiracy theory with like so so yeah every every single woman we meet in this movie is out to get josh hartnett yeah 100 okay first of all at one point two of the women walk in and then they were like we're gonna lesbian kiss in front of you and you're not going to be able to resist that

that's the one where she says she's basically trying to get the pussy power back and she says it pretty explicitly that like women have because it's the idea of like well men want to fuck so badly like their evolutionary impulses to get us pregnant so we have

this power and if you are saying you can resist us, even for all of us for 40 days, then that means that we've lost our power on this like fundamental level. So she's like, we are threatened as the half of this population that is supposed to have this power.

We are threatened. And so we have to fuck you or else we lose. Yeah. And then just confirms like the belief that that's the only power that they have ever had the okay so i think we should take that power but i think we should i think women i mean i'm already doing my part not to fuck these people but i think only about 10 of them really deserve to get laid so i would say it's less than that yeah i mean tops 10 as far as i can tell so you know we should wield that power i mean it's a good power to have but it's not the only power to have

and it seems like like that girl is grasping at stride she's like without withholding sex i have nothing and she nothing it's insane that they do this where she said where he says oh you're not really trying to have sex for me for this insane philosophical random thing that you do. This idea that women are going to lose their pussy power if I don't have sex with any of you. You're not doing it for that. You're doing it for the money. And she's like, no, I'm not.

I've already signed a notarized thing that I'm giving all my winnings. She took it to a notary to get it notarized. That doesn't even mean anything. She couldn't have any motivation except. They needed it to be a pure thing where this woman had to prove that a man cannot resist having sex with a woman. So here's how that scene plays out. Matt is in the back getting a bunch of Maxell tapes because he works at computer.com. They need a lot of Maxell tapes there.

This woman, whose name is andy she is named she walks in the room and says something akin to i understand what you're doing matt women have been doing this since well forever so we all know about the power see us having the power that's part of the system and by you taking the power you're fucking with the system and i think you can see why we can't let that happen and then you know, she shows her whole notarized document and is like, I'm not in it for the money. I'm in it for the power. And Matt's like, so you want to have sex with me to get back the power? And then she says, we're willing to do whatever is necessary to get the job done.

By then, a second woman is in the room who expresses doubt about doing this. Shout out to the movie Doubt. 2008, love it. More Oscars should have been given. But there's like a second woman who comes in and is like, I don't know if we should do this. And the other girl, Andy, is like, no, we're doing this. And then like starts to like forcibly kiss her.

To entrap Josh Hartnett. Right, which feels like another one of those scenes, like Cruel Intentions, where it's like, well, the male filmmakers, we got to make this movie hot. We got to make it hot for the boys who are watching this. Let's put two women kissing so that the little boys can be like, oh, wow. Hey, I mean, I appreciated that scene.

Sure. You know, they're going to use their tongues. I mean, you know, that's fine with me. And Josh Hartnett was like, no, the scene. Sure. They're going to use their tongues. I don't know. They did use it. And Josh Harger was like, no, the tongues. No, the tongues. I used to be creeped out by the tongue thing. I think it's because of that two girls, one cup thing that happened. And ever since then, it took me a long time to heal.

And I only sideways glanced at that ever once. But still, just like what they were doing with their tongues really ruined lesbian tongue stuff for me for a long time so if this movie was actually pretty healing it was the first time i watched two people just rub tongues together i was like you know what i think i can enjoy this again accept it i guess it's just telling that you rarely see like a lesbian kiss on screen between two queer women who are kissing each other because they like each other and they're attracted to each other it's usually this is for a man it's usually something evil two we can assume straight women who are kissing each other to either seem more attractive to men to get better at kissing to so they can be good at kissing men or to like seduce and entrap men so that's like the only representation you get on screen in mainstream

movies of two women kissing it's it's usually yeah under those conditions there should be like a bechdel test for for lesbian kisses too and this one does not pass you should make that test yeah there's yeah that norman test is whether is whether two women kissing is at all for them. Which, you know. Female pleasure has no part in this movie. At least one of those women was cute. Oh, sure. The one who's like, Josh Hartnett's not even cute, by the way. Which was great.

Because I feel like they gave him a worse haircut for that. I remember him being kind of cute when I was younger. I always thought he looks like dumb and dumber. Like, yeah, I can't tell if my tastes have changed or if like I saw him like on the cover of that movie and thought he was cute at the time. Or if I'm now looking, you know, we're just like, people all looked stupid back then. But I'm like, no, that haircut was horrible.

His face was not great. It is confusing that he would struggle to not have sex for 40 days with that haircut yeah is how i feel sure that scene is like aside from the the rape scene that scene was like what is going on in this movie and it's so he's so clearly the victim in all of these situations these are all happening at work this This is all like workplace sexual harassment that no one's doing anything about because the boss is like

why won't my wife fuck me? That frigid. Let's get out of here. We haven't talked about him. Thebossofcomputer.com is first like cool idea to not have sex because now you've got the power and you're withholding it. I'm going to do that to my wife

because she doesn't want to fuck me so i'm just gonna be like i'm not gonna fuck you and she's gonna be like no fuck me and then john hartnett's like okay cut to formard he's like my wife says her life is way better since i stopped fucking her she's so happy dude can i just say i related to that guy so hard i don't know if y'all know that i'm twice divorced and i remember that's honestly though i remember trying that i remember being like well if i stop trying maybe then she'll like try to come on to me and that will be good so like the fact that that was in there i was like dude y'all that's real man these games that you play with women to be like the truth is i just don't think that we were sexually compatible honestly i think there's i've been figuring out a lot of stuff

about my gender and sexuality but like yeah i elaborate things in your mind and i think so many people do date people that they're not that sexually compatible with um for we date people for a variety of other reasons like maybe they're attracted to us or whatever you know and then we have this like sexual dysfunction so this poor boss like is having a real problem I have no sympathy for him I didn't I didn't like I mean the first scene that he was in I was just like oh, oh, God, this is so like what a waste of a scene. But then when it like flashed forward to like, oh, OK, I'm glad that they at least point out that this doesn't work. Yeah. Because it doesn't.

But then there's a third scene he's in where he is trying to look under his employee's skirt. And then he lost me again. Yeah. Right. Well, he's allowing all this sexual harassment to happen. And then he's also again. Yeah. Right. Well, he's allowing all this sexual harassment to happen. And then he's also sexually harassing his employees. His troubles at home, I think, are he's allowing himself to feel disdain for women in general because of his wife's rejection. He's also like, if you've ever worked at a startup where the boss is 20 years older than you and then everyone else is 24 and they're just kind of like leering at the general workplace.

I've worked for a bunch of guys like that who are just like, you know, they frame it like, yeah, we're all friends here. This is a family. If anyone ever calls your workplace a family, you're in a toxic workplace. But they're like, yeah, we're all fam here. And like, you don't have insurance. Are you guys fucking? What's going on? And it's just like always a creepy older dude whose home life is bad and then he's like let me see if i can get my 20 something year old employees to fuck each other and tell me about

it like yeah he's very that's what he lives for is just to hear about their fucking yeah no it's it's upsetting and also in the workplace is that scene where just no woman acts rationally in this movie just blanket statement right so when the three women basically the fucking what's the group in greece oh oh what are they the poodle friends what are they called yeah that's right the poodle friends they're like the poodle friends of computer.com and they're like hey did you hear that josh hartnett isn't fucking anymore and then one is like we'll see about that which is like why do that she corners josh hartnett in a room that is the walls are glass so everyone in the workplace is watching her try to seduce she photocopies her own ass embarrassing before that she spreads her legs wide eagle and is like, check out my butterfly tattoo

right next to my puss. I'm trying to get another tattoo on the other side of my puss. I think you'll get a puss. By the way, if women, I also believe, as much as it's problematic to even care, I also believe that if women really did want him to lose this bet, they could have done a much better job. It's like they have no subtlety. Each one of them is like

i'm gonna make you lose this bet and here's my boobs and it's like don't tell someone you're gonna make them lose the bet you gotta trick them into this you don't start with all four tricking men yes like they're so bad at it it's like yeah no i mean well it's like yeah because like women are in the movie are also stupid as hell. They're malicious and dumb and horny and mean. All the women you see in this movie, aside from Erica, because we'll get into her in a minute, but all the women who aren't Erica fall into, I think, one of four categories. It's either a conniving bitch, which is the ex-girlfriend Nicole.

It's the colleague who evilly tries to seduce him by being like here's my butterfly tattoo um they are like a frigid shrew or a prude type uh which would be like his boss's wife or matt's mom who we meet yeah who's like a very prudish like you can't talk about sex can i speak to your? Yeah. But it turns out she's a freak in the bed. She's just trying not to tell her sons about it. It's kind of strange that they're acting like she's a prude. It's like, well, her sons are over and the father is weirdly trying to talk about their sex life to their adult sons now for no reason.

To the priest's son and the guy with the celibacy vow. Oh, yeah, because there's a brief tangent where Josh Hartnett's like, I know how to not be hor son and the guy with the celibacy vow yeah that was oh yeah because there's like a brief tangent where like josh hartnett's like i know how to not be horny hang out with my parents but then his parents are horny he brings out like a chart of all the sexual positions that he can do with his hip surgery having happened and so it's still somehow like turning josh on to watch the little cartoons of people the mom does so the mom i guess actually does end up being horny yeah well that's another category is like horny nympho basically all the women the women in the office the women at the coffee shop on like no bras for hot women day that's i couldn't tell

if that was another hallucination that's what i want to talk about joke there's a lot of stuff in this movie where you cannot really tell whether it's a hallucination or not. And so it makes me, it's the only thing that can redeem any of this is if you just pretend that all of it's in his head. Because it's like, at first the ceiling cracking is ridiculous and that's clearly a hallucination. And then sometimes women are like taking off their shirts in front of him on the subway and we know that's a hallucination. But then no bra day seems to be real real he tells his priest brother that it was it was an official is it official or unofficially unofficially sponsored no no bras for hot women day for the coffee shop for hot for hot women i'm like i'm like who's the one who determines who gets to participate in this day whose feelings

are hurt hopefully it's the honor system they're like if you're a hot woman you know it you know it we need a revision on this now national holiday yeah um i think we should do this in general you know more no broad day i'm fine with that i think yeah sure the other thing that he thinks is fake is actually but is actually real is his brother hooking up with the nut. Oh, yes. Where he walks in thinking he's hallucinating. But that was real. Right.

And then his brother's like, actually, I'm not going to be a priest, which I thought was kind of funny. He needs psychiatric medication. That's the thing. It's like, if this movie is all in his head, he's very sick. The twist at the end is this is really sort of a memento-esque thing like we've been the whole thing was a hallucination and that's the only reason that it was make any sense also josh hartnett's like tribal back tech too oh my god oh god um and then the other the other category that women fall into is like kind of like the gullible idiot it's basically any woman who ryan tries to date because ryan's like oh i'm i'm mind orgasmic

and then she's like oh mind orgasmic what's that so like she's just like believing anything that he all the lies that he's feeding her to get her into bed so it's these like wildly reductive tropes that all these women fall into. Let's take a quick break and then we'll come back with more to discuss. Daphne Caruana Galizia was a Maltese investigative journalist who on October 16th, 2017 was murdered. There are crooks everywhere you look now. The situation is desperate. My name is Manuel Delia. I am one of the hosts of Crooks Everywhere, a podcast that unhurts the plot to murder a one-woman Wikileaks.

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I have a proposal for you. Come up here and document my project. All you need to do is record everything like you always do. One session. 24 hours. BPM 110. 120. She's terrified. Should we wake her up? Absolutely not. What was that?

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I'm gonna talk about Nicole's character. We've alluded to this already, but the opening sequence of the movie is a bunch of home video that Matt took when he was in a relationship with Nicole. And then we see him watching it back six months after she has broken up with him and he's still stalking her and broken up about it. But the video is so weirdly telling where it's like it starts out where it's like they're happy. They're in San Francisco. They're wearing turtlenecks it's great but then you see the video over time where she he seems to be

invading her space like there's he's filming her sleep and she wakes up and she's like no stop doing that and he's like no and he gets closer and then she's like stop yeah and then it's like she's in the bathroom in a towel and he's filming her and she like closes the door so in my head it's like okay that is someone you would break up with who would do that but i think we're supposed to think like oh she was like mean to him and like we feel bad she was pushing him away right right and implies that it was like somehow her like it's on her and she was cruel to him and then the way he treats her throughout the movie is like he definitely is obsessed with her there's still pictures of her all over the apartment six months later not healthy the whole like no he's pining for her thing is like tired. But I mean, it also is like called out in the movie as like not good behavior.

But I feel like that's that comes from his roommate, Ryan, who and his brother. Yeah. And those guys are just like, I mean, especially the Ryan character, who's just like this toxic dude who's constantly making statements like men be like this. Women be like this. Men are supposed to come. And that's just how men are there's like all these like very these are the two genders and here's what they do two sexes we

haven't even thought about gender by this year just the idea that like you start off like watching it now seeming like she is a fairly rational person yeah and then she does the whole spider-man two thing where she's like i'm mad i'm getting married now and that is somehow canonically the spider-man 2 thing and that even her your engagement is another like strike on women it's another women suck thing because it's like oh this guy's clearly just a rich dude right she's left him for just for some dude for his money and that's like that's like a weirdly like stock character too of like the guy that, you know, she left you for. He's always like rich and he's always a dick.

He's a dick. Yeah. Usually looks like James Marsden. He does. Or often is. James Marsden. And then the leap of logic, like we find out from Ryan that she's being cheated on.

And so it's like the story is constantly taking revenge on this woman that started out by not really doing much wrong right and then she's just total heel turn at the end uh where she's just turned into an absolute rapist villain in a way that doesn't make sense with anything we know about her but we don't really know anything about we do see the scene where she first comes over to be like, well, yeah, we're not engaged anymore. He's cheating on me. Do you want to have sex? And then he says, no, actually, I've got this 40 days thing going. I've got this girl.

And she's like, I am so turned on by being rejected by you that like. But that doesn't make sense with anything we know about her. Like, it's just weird. Oh, it doesn't make sense with anything we know about her like it's just weird oh it doesn't make nothing makes sense but it's just like this is how they use her character to be like oh i'm so turned on by you now even if you close the door i'm just gonna be out here moaning even harder because of the rejection and so somehow that is her then motivation to go place this bet and win this money is like the sexual rejection has so like insulted but also turned her on but that scene like leading

up to him like standing up for herself and then she gets like horned up by someone yelling at her which great message right is before that like his monologue that i'm thinking that it's like we're supposed to be like yeah good for you josh hartnett is that like she's like you're saying no to me and then he says you always do this to me i must be the idiot because i keep coming back but i'm not coming back anymore you take everything from me i was like she just broke up with you because you were a lot and here you are being a fucking lot again but then it's like her character is not written to follow any sort of rationality that's how a lot of men feel about women.

Yeah. It's like, yeah, if they have some kind of relationship and then they, you took everything from me. And it's like, what is that feeling? That's like a thesis statement on that character. Like, that's how he feels about. Whoever wrote this movie clearly feels about women. It's like, these vampires are just out here to get us. Right.

And then it's like, I'll prove a point by writing female characters to be this way. To be this. Yeah. And then speaking of irrational behavior, can we get into Erica? Yeah. Yeah, let's get into Erica. No, we haven't talked about her at all. Yeah.

It's almost like she's boring and we don't know anything about her. It's almost like she's a shell of a character. So in most scenes that she is in, she is getting enraged about something for no reason. She's constantly behaving very irrationally and it makes little to no sense. So the first she gets mad at him three different times. The first time is when she finds out about his vow. Right. I don't know why she's so pissed off again because they only met once once or twice maybe before two times at the laundromat and then she's like how dare you

not tell me that you're giving up something for lent like yeah that's been and then she's furious i'm like are we are you guys religious like it doesn't seem like anyone. And they've met two times. And then she finds out about it on the internet. And then she's furious at him. Yeah. Her getting so enraged by that doesn't make any sense. But it's clear. The writer of this movie is like, well, we have to find conflict somewhere.

So we'll make her be mad. This is a bet movie. Because women be getting mad all the time. Yeah. So then for reasons that are not clear, she decides that she's not mad at him anymore and she's going to hang out with him again. Right. Then. For reasons that are not clear is like the every other sentence.

Yes, exactly. To precede anyone doing anything in this movie. There aren't really. There are reasons. Then she gets mad at him whenever she finds out about his ex-girlfriend and this happens on their second date so he has not told her that he has dated other people and she is furious about it so she keeps being like you said that you were honest but you keep lying about things or withholding the truth and that's why i'm mad at you but like you're not obligated to tell someone on a second date you're an entire dating history it's an

extremely emotionally immature movie and like because yeah it's acting as if as soon as you meet someone you know at first sight that you're in love without having a conversation and now at this point you should then tell them everything about yourself. You should each merge completely. It's a very weird lesbian impulse almost. That's how this should be perceived. That's how she seems. It's like, how have you not told me everything about you? I thought we were in love and getting married and this is intimate and we should be.

Yeah. What? And like her motivations adjust to his mission in a way that like doesn't. I just, I, nothing is realistic. But it's like if you met someone who didn't seem to like you at the laundromat and continue to pursue them and they're like, actually, I'm not fucking right now. I'd be like, I'll see myself out. But she she just kind of adjusts to him and says instead that like sex doesn't matter and it's only about the kiss and like totally flips the script from like being horny to being like okay i'll do what you want i mean and then they

have the sexy flower fuck which is great um well before we get to that because i do want to talk about female orgasms and their depiction on screen but um so she's gotten mad at him about not knowing that he has ever had an ex-girlfriend. And then again, for reasons that are not clear, she decides she's not mad anymore. She's going to hang out with him again. And then we see the scene with the flower petal. It's blowing around near her puss,

and she has an orgasm. And then the final I got mad at you for no reason thing happens when matt gets raped by nicole and then erica and then she's just like she's so mad she's so so mad and it's because the movie does not treat what happened as rape the movie treats it like when she comes in he says oh my god i just cheated on i mean he doesn't say cheated but he's like i thought it was you and so he doesn't say i was raped so really this is actually a good depiction of how men are not reporting their rapes you know here he should have said i was just raped can you call the cops and instead he goes

i thought it was you right so he doesn't believe in his own like you know he doesn't believe that women are capable of agency enough to even to call that rape he's just like oh i must have fucked her yeah even though i was not conscious or lucid so even in his getting raped he's not respecting women that's what's really insane about that and it's like it's you know men are raped that does happen but statistically so much less right than women that it's just like another victimizing this character in a way that just enables his bad behavior and doesn't make sense and it's more complicated than that but it's just i don't know like women in this movie are evil. And they do, as the movie goes on, they do more and more evil things. And it's only the woman who complies

with exactly what he wants and like helps him accomplish this mission even while he's lying to her and doing all this other stuff. She's the one who's like quote unquote rewarded with his filthy boner a month and change later now that i think about it though when she when when erica walks into that room and he's like oh i thought it was i thought it was you and not i didn't know it was this nicole chick he's handcuffed

to his bed rails at this point yeah and so she either has to be like, wow, so you decided to have kinky handcuff sex for this vow-breaking, bet-losing sex that you had with your ex? Yeah. Or, hey, why are you handcuffed to the, what happened there? She doesn't question it at all. Doesn't question it. It's just like, ah, here's Josh again. There should be so many follow-ups, too. Instead, she's just, how could you cheat on me?

Yeah. I guess to be fair, she does not realize that he had been sexually assaulted. Right. So she's mad on the grounds that like, oh, you cheated on me. And if that were true, which is not what happens, but let's say for argument's sake that it is, they've hung out four times. Like she, you're not in a relationship yet like he's not cheating on you but again the movie's like well we have to have like the final conflict that we needs to be resolved by the end so like also kind of like the puritanical thing they're pushing

of like the longer you don't have sex with someone the purer your bond is right and that sex is like this thing that taints relationships which you know can be very true but it's just the way it's framed is weirdly religious like the the that looks like well the you know now that they've waited it's like almost like the weird like high school narrative like we have to wait until the moment is right and then it'll be perfect and we'll be together forever and this movie weirdly subscribes to that even though it makes fun of religion through the brother character i don't know i mean i can't even say religious undertones because it's specifically lent you know but it's like the 40

days and nights is there's like uh jesus fasted for 40 days and there's they at one point make it a little explicit that they kind of are comparing him to Jesus in the ability to withstand the sex. But then so it makes me wonder because he's already made himself into a Christ figure. Oh I'm going to resist sex instead of food and water. He even says like I look like I'm on the And yeah when he's handcuffed to the bed frame it's like they've actually

you're using imagery, Christ figure imagery and it's like that's a little much. 40 days and 40 nights. That did not You don't have literary themes going on here. That did hit for me that's fucking nuts yeah oh i mean and it's like yes jesus did go without food and water but he was jerking off every day so that's a great point i've never thought about how jesus was jerking off while he was fasting you can survive in the desert you have to drink your own are you allowed to drink your own cum if you're fasting loophole that's how you do that you can drink your own bodily fluids those calories don't count goodness um but yeah basically the movie is like the movie uses the

erica character as just a way by which conflict can happen because she's getting so irrationally mad all the time and they just have the formula of a bet a sex bet movie and they didn't bother doing any of the work to connect any of the points they were just like she gets mad every 20 minutes and then we resolve yeah they just didn't bother having reasons for anything right they're like it just has to happen and like her friendship with maggie gyllenhaal is so weird where there's a scene where they're walking together and erica's talking to her about how they haven't had sex yet yeah and erica's like trying to act like she's cool with it even though it's clear that she's like she would want to be having sex and she's like it's great it's like i'm being treated like an equal and then her

friend's like that sucks doesn't it and she's like it totally sucks and you're just like oh that is that is how that seems wait how did what's the line right before i they feel like i'm being treated like an equal just that they're not having sex i'm trying to follow this logic there's a i don't have all the dialogue written now but it's uh she's saying like you know i think maggie gyllenhaal's character's like wait you guys haven't had sex yet and she's like no he's like doing this thing and then she and then she maggie gyllenhaal does the obvious 2002 joke of like what is he gay yeah well they're like he's got a girlfriend no he doesn't he's like oh he's gay some guys are just different about this stuff right and that's that's

what leads into this conversation like she's not saying it sucks to be treated as an equal just she's saying it sucks to have sex but i'm just like, man, these are some of the only two-woman exchanges you get in the movie, and it's all about like... Well, there's not a single line of this movie that's not about sex, first of all. Right. And sex as it pertains to Josh Hartnett. Yeah, to specifically at least one man, but not Josh Hartnett. There's another moment of casual homophobia earlier on

where Ryan, the roommate, is talking to Matt. And he's like, you know, this is never going to work out for you. You can go on two dates without a kiss and pass as old fashioned. You go three, you're a homo. So very cool casual homophobia of the early 2000s. I defy people to find a romantic comedy of the early 2000s that doesn't have at least two instances of casual homophobia. Indeed. Another thing I wanted to point out is that a large part of the date that takes place on the bus is seen in like montage form.

So we don't hear her talking like this is when we would be learning things about her character, hearing what she has to say, her talking about her interests, stuff like that. But we don't. We hear music over a montage instead. So, like, a deliberate choice was made in the edit of this movie or in the writing or whatever that we, like, one of the few opportunities we would have to get to know this character is robbed from us. And we still hardly know anything about her except that she gets mad all the time irrationally well that's a woman right there for you you know that's all i'm getting mad all the time we just get mad and who cares about anything about us and then the and then the the the final the way the whole story ends the final beat is that matt is like oh yeah

it probably even shouldn't have done this whole stupid vow thing what i should have done this whole time is this and then he pounces on her surprise kisses her the movie frames it as if it's like the big romantic moment the huge reconciliation she hasn't really forgiven him right like that hasn't been a super but as soon as his lips plant on hers baby she forgives him well since she's so irrationally mad she's probably just not been on her period or whatever i mean yeah yeah that's 40 days and 40 nights yeah she's that's what she just got off the pill for the first time in several years and it's just like a lot she's free bleeding she's free bleeding well what are we to make of

that as like a lesson like because that's how they're presenting it by him saying what i should have done this whole time it's implying that he shouldn't have done this bet that that wasn't healthy or good for him that if you meet a cute girl who smiles at you at the laundry room the proper thing the correct thing to have done would have been to just kiss her from the get-go and start fucking well and it's yeah that is like the whole logic of like the correct thing to have done would have been to just kiss her from the get-go and start fucking. Well, and it's, yeah, that is like the whole logic of like the only way

to get over someone is to get under someone else. But that wasn't working because the ceiling was caving in, but maybe with the right girl, the ceiling wouldn't have caved in. If you get the right girl, whose personality,

we don't know anything about. We don't, yeah. It's such mental gymnastics. It has to be the right look, basically. The girl who's hot enough this guy this movie is just a disaster i like i just wish that josh hartnett had stayed in a room with his trains for a couple days really confronted his meditated like made some trains and then been like you know

maybe i am ready to get back out there but it just wasn't i mean he's in that tech bro environment it's hard to just be with your trains sometimes i love that the erectile dysfunction doesn't really come up he can still get it hard i think it would be too much for men to deal with if he couldn't get it hard we weren't talking about that we're still barely talking about that in movies and so instead it was just that he can't come but boners are not a problem no i. You can always get it up. He's got super-sized boners. He has a bonar at work. He has a bonar at home. He's whipping his gnar around. Oh, yeah.

There's that scene where he comes in with gnar blazing into a fucking important meeting. And they're like, get out of here. You're hard. And he's like, oh, no. Oh, my God. This happens to all men. they go to a critical business completely erect horrifying i don't know uh can we talk briefly about the depiction of the of the female orgasm oh yeah i can't talk about this movie much longer i know i know

i'm so fascinated about like women straight whatever, women who have sex with men's sex lives, because y'all really aren't coming as much as you should be, right? We're not really coming. Not to delve too deeply into my personal life. I just mean women on average. But I'm about to say that a man has never made me cum. I've heard that from a lot of my lovers. Yeah. say that a man has never made me cum. I've heard that from a lot of my lovers. So anyway, so at least at the very, very, very least, the movie... I'll choose to remain silent.

That tells me everything I need to know. So at the very least, this movie acknowledges that the female orgasm exists because most movies don't even bother to acknowledge that it's a thing i don't think this movie handles it well uh but we do see two female orgasms one in the beginning whenever she's like come with me we gotta have a simultaneous come sesh yeah so that was pretty empowering i guess but she also is made to seem like a crazy person i'm surprised she didn't lick the white out to see if it was coming on. That was one of the few things, yeah, where I was like, well, she did initiate the sex. You don't get to see women initiate sex very often.

But then, of course, she ended up being crazy. And she was calling the shots during the sex. I was like, that's pretty cool. But then it just takes this very sinister turn right any like woman initially being presented as being sex positive ends up that they are she's a demon yeah she's actually demon from crazy so that's the first female orgasm we see and that ends up being demonized because she's or the movie wants you to think she's crazy. The second one is the scene we already touched on a little bit, where he's got, also, I think this scene with the orchid petal

would violate the terms of his vow, because he says no sexual intimacy of any kind. If you were blowing around a petal on a naked woman, and making her cum. We're just justifying it. Yeah, this is loose, like, butt stuff doesn't count rules. That would have been great if they had just been doing butt stuff the whole movie. And then he's like, yeah, it doesn't count.

Yeah, it doesn't count. I'm still winning this bet. It is worth saying, now I'm looking into, on the Wikipedia article, apparently this sex scene was voted one of the top ten worst sex scenes in movies ever. It's silly. It's silly. It's silly. I don't think... I was kind of horny for it. I was watching it next to my hot girlfriend, so maybe that helped.

But I was like... I was alone and I was still like, pretty good. Top 10 worst? What are they talking about? I know. I mean, well, okay. Shamers. They just hate female orgasms. I love it. I mean, this is the only sex scene i've ever seen in a movie where the woman comes and the man doesn't that's a good point yeah there

you go i can't it's not the becktale test but it's sometimes we could end that it's as close as we get but this movie is also perpetuating the idea that women just come all the time without clitoral stimulation it doesn't show you bad habits so okay there there may be some women out there who can achieve orgasm if a flower petal is blown around near your puss i don't want to shame anyone who comes that way tantric but that is usually i would say not enough yeah and then the woman usually a man's gonna flop his hand all over your vagina for 45 minutes and then you're like woohoo and they're like i did it but then also in the first scene where we see a woman have an orgasm he's not doing anything to stimulate her clitoral region

there are he's hallucinating he's like having a full-on panic attack, and she's coming. Yeah, and she's like, ugh. I think only around 25% of women are able to achieve orgasm just through vaginal penetration. I have a joke about this that I'm doing right now. Ooh. So it's not that many. But it's honestly great for them. Great for them.

But I don't think that's true. I just think that men haven't figured out how to do it. Are the odds really that some of us are special, the chosen people well or is it that okay but if men didn't know that women could come at all until the 60s if we thought the clit was a myth you know what i mean like i didn't know that when i could come at all until i was 21 right so of course of course like more women can it's just that like they're the only ones who've had good lovers who've been using their fingers enough and stuff like that. Like I've made women come vaginally. It's because I'm using my fingers.

Right. And I'm like paying a lot of attention and it's not about me coming. So like it's just the men, you guys. It's not one in five or four women. No. I'm feeling very empowered by this. I can't believe how bad women straight women's sex life still are I really thought men had gotten better I thought with all the sexual but the more I talk

to people individually and as audiences I'm like god no y'all really gotta like and there really is like that fear of emasculating a man by telling him he's doing it wrong why are we afraid of emasculating men I have a joke about that. Because men who are emasculated become violent. Yeah, but I mean, don't, you gotta break up with these people. I have a joke about like a guy getting, because this is based on a true story. A guy like got frustrated and almost mad at me because he didn't make me cum. Yeah, I've had that experience too. I'm like, what?

It's like, sorry, I think you're mad at yourself. Yeah. But he like takes it out. But like if someone is willing to do, to like blame you for them not making you cum, it's like, I don't want to have this discussion with this person. I would like, because people like that, I'm just like, you guys are like, you guys are dangerous. Scary.

Yeah. Scary people. So I just stopped having sex altogether. Oh yeah. 40 days and 40 nights times however many, any multiple that you need. I might start dating women. You probably should try it just for this. Just to learn more about your body and sex and then try to go back to the men and teach them things.

I also don't see why all women aren't just having sex. I mean, I don't mean this in a hornball way right now. I'm not trying to come on you guys. But I just mean like why aren't all women just having sex with each other? I think it would be very strengthening because if we want to win the war against men, which there is one, we should probably bond together. We should probably stop having sex with most of them.

Get better genes, for one thing. Have y'all seen Birds? The Hitchcock? No, not the movie. I just mean in general. Have y'all? Yes, yes, yes. The birds in Planet Earth,

I think it's even in the first episode, where it's like the females of these, and there's a lot of different bird species that are like this, right? Where the females are these plain brown birds. Ugly. Ugly little plain brown birds. Not even to say ugly. They're just cute.

They're so cute. Sure. They're plain little brown birds. Caitlin, that was so good. Sorry to shame our bird listeners out there, female bird listeners. Sorry I didn't mean to call you ugly. The males of the species evolved to be like blue and green and bright and do these crazy gay little dances they're doing the most they're the gayest little dance like these men are so

yeah they're doing the most and then these women just choose between those and then it's like i found a one bird species where still the the girls are little plain plain brown things and these guys look crazy and colorful. But they also, the men, build these little rape protection huts for the women. Okay. So all the little, all the gay little men birds, bright purple and pink and yellow Mardi Gras little birds create, they build these little rape shield huts. And then the brown little birds, when they're ready, all come and go pick their little rape shield huts.

They go, oh, this is mine. This is yours. And then they sit there in these things, and then the male birds come out and do their gay little dances. And then if they get to the point where they think one of the women's interested, then they go behind them, and then they start to try. And that's what the rape shield hut comes in because if the woman changes her mind at any point, at any point she chooses that she doesn't consent anymore. She just flies out. And the little thing protects her from being like he can't really follow her. She has enough time to escape because of the design.

That's feminism. Now let's go in that direction. Yeah. I say. Wow. And this is why these incels want to kill us because we have ideas like this. Like let's seriously not. They're like like no these birds they have these huts oh my god that's incredible i love that wait i want to yeah i know more there's a spider species

where you know because the women are like large can you keep calling them women and not like females i like thinking of them this way, right? So the little men ones, they do this thing where they, first of all, they shoot spider web around their legs. So there's a kind of bondage element to it. Oh, okay. So that the women can't immediately bite their heads off, which is what they will do if a male just approaches.

But first he ties her legs up, which seems bad. But then they go down on the women for up to an hour whoa because if they do it well enough then she'll be too tired and drowsy to bite his head off he can get close enough he can get close enough

to shoot his load and then she'll be like kind of drowsy from it and she won't bite his head off and he can get away or at least they usually still die but at least he can get his seat in before she's able to get his head off and he can get away. Or at least, they usually still die, but at least he can get his seat in before she's able to get his head off. That is incredible. See?

Man, I used to have a... What have we done as humans? All wrong. Nothing. I'm the one who's putting on makeup and trying to impress men. No, we have to unionize. Yeah.

I mean, we have to have some of the good... I would just want to have good sex once in my life. And it's, I mean, I've heard lesbians joke about this and like, I'm like, honestly, maybe we do need to do some training camps for men. I mean, get rid of the, like the conversion therapy camps, make it how to fuck good. Fingering and tonguing camps. Like the oral and manual skills really need to be. We need to be educating these straight men

i didn't realize how good at sex i was there until i you know every time because i like have considered dating men a number and straight women every time i mention it or just like don't why would you even it's not worth it you'll get nothing out of that so it's it's not a pop I'd recommend. We've got to wrap up pretty soon. This movie is so bad. It's wretched. Do you have another thing you want to talk about? Even if I did, I don't want to talk about this movie anymore. This movie is exhausting.

It's bad in every way a movie can be bad. I know, Titanic. Wow. Beautiful. The one quick person I wanted to bring up was the absurdity of Bagel Boy. Yeah. Bagel Boy, that was one of the, because he is, he somehow has like the misogynist tea on every woman in San Francisco, knows everything about every woman as he's setting up these

bagels, which is his job to go into this tech company and put five bagels on a bagel stand and leave with his bare hands every time he does it he talks about fucking a woman yes and he'll go so there's always a match on action when he goes fuck her fuck her fuck her to slamming a bagel onto the holder and that's over the top it's edited i don't know i'm sure this is done on purpose but it's so jarring when he's placing the bagels it's edited to be so loud where he's just like yeah you know so i fucked her in her hole click and then it's like this loud like steel sounding bagel hitting it's oh god bagel boy canceled oh my god yeah well the oh my god this this is just such a piece of shit so

people probably we should just no one should ever watch this movie yeah do not write not even as a hate watch it's just it's it's draining maybe watch the sex scene yeah the sex i'm sure the sex scene is on youtube but skip the rest you should have your listeners tell you if they like that sex scene because i can't imagine I don't understand why it's top 10 worst I bet it's just a list made by a man yeah

oh because a man doesn't come yeah a man doesn't come and a woman does yeah this is the gayest sex scene I've ever seen flowers

and a guy I thought I truly the more we talk about it I'm like that was I was on board for that alright I'm ambivalent and you never get to see women come on screen rarely yes ever true so that at least there's that oh

also you know everyone involved in this movie uh was a man cannot find i hope so i was i was like if a woman wrote on this i don't want to know about it i know just i was like is this going to be yet another katherine bigelow betrayal of her gender? No. It was directed by a man, produced by a man, written by a man. Perfect. Composed, cinematography, everything is not, and distributed by Miramax. So, you know, just rapists top to bottom.

Yeah. I'm not implying everyone who worked on this movie was a rapist, to be clear. Good. The last thing I guess I had to say about it is like technically the temptation in this movie is supposed to be sex but the movie completely conflates sex with women like they treat them like they're the same thing so women are the temptation and they like embody the temptation of sex and nothing else oh my god we didn't even talk about that scene where it's like, I think his last day, or next

to his last day of his vow, and he's just like seeing naked women all over the street. You see all these topless women. There's so much male gaze, cinematography in this movie, and it's just like, are you fucking... But it was filmed like a nightmare sequence. Yeah.

He was running through the city like, there are too many titties. I also think that if the boob world were made today it would be ass world that's just my oh i think that there would be over poorly rendered ass let's remake it and that's for everyone baby hey this movie passes the bechdel test Sure doesn't. There are women talking in it. However, they're always talking about Matt and his sex life. I counted five different conversations between Erica and Maggie Gyllenhaal's character, who's, I don't know if we've learned her name ever, but they talk five different times about Matt every single time.

It's always like, oh, you met this guy. Oh, he gave you a high five. Oh, he gave you an orgasm. Oh, it's always like oh you met this guy oh he gave you a high five oh he gave you an orgasm oh it's your first time oh he brought you a gift maggie dylan hall is a fucking plot machine and the only reason we know anything about erica at all is because the cyber nanny job is a plot element to get her to be mad at him because that's how she learns about it. Otherwise, I don't think we would have learned about a job. Definitely not. So the one fact that we know about her in their journey to being in love

is this job that is only a plot device. I bet that that, like in the writing of the movie, that cyber nanny thing was added in later when they're like, oh, how would she find out? Oh, this would make sense. Internet. Internet. Also, this is also the same director as heathers yes i saw that well should let's rate it on our nipple scale zero five nipples uh this gets like negative 40 nipples and 40 ass cheeks yeah

we're bringing ass cheeks into the equation i'm'm going to do negative 40 nipples, 40 butts. Okay. Because that trips off the tongue. Sure. 40 nipples and 40 butts. Yeah, I love it. Is my reboot. Very white movie.

Takes place in San Francisco. And yet everyone is white. There's like a couple. Erica's. I think she that actress Shannon Sossaman is mixed

I know she's at least partially Filipino okay but she is hot we would never find out enough about Erica's character

to know what her she's in Rules of Attraction she's in A Knight's Tale she was in a bunch of movies right around this time oh right right right

and then was never seen from or heard from again this was probably the last straw I can't do this anymore but yeah very white very hetero movie and yeah everything about it every fucking last moment of this movie

is a disaster well Ariel thank you so much for joining us. Sorry again for having made you watch this movie. You know, I know. Where can people follow you online? Is there anything

you would like to plug? Yeah, I mean, if you like podcasts, maybe listen to my podcast. It's called Gender Fluids and it's about sex and gender, but my podcast co-host is a trans chick comedian, Austin Smart, and she and I are the most disgusting comics in Austin. And then we started a podcast together where we talk about all kinds of gender and sex stuff. But don't listen if you're easily offended.

Amazing. And then, you know, you can go to ArielIsaacNorman.com, A-R-I-E-L-L-E. I put up my shows and anything that I'm doing. In Austin, I have a show called Offscript that is the third Saturday of every month at the Fallout Theater. And it's just this show where we do stand up, but the audience is encouraged to heckle. And I give out prizes to people who are funny at it. Oh, fun. And some people are like, oh, is it mean?

And I'm like, well, some people are mean, but I usually kind of just make fun of them. And we try to make it into more of an interactive, just fun time. Right on. So Austin Bechtelheads, go check out the show. Check it out. And yeah, you can follow me on Twitter at Poop Tampon.

Is that real? Yeah. Hell yeah. Can you believe no one had taken that? Incredible. A victory for the culture amazing you can follow us unfortunately our handle is not poop tampon because it was taken you took it but you can follow us at bechtel cast on all the platforms uh patreon slash matreon uh go to patreon.com slash Bechtelcast and sign up for our Matreon. It's $5 a month and you get two bonus episodes every single month.

Uh, TeePublic for all of our merch, our awesome designs, feminist icon, rise of the matriarchy, et cetera. All of that shit. Get that at TeePublic.com slash the Bechtel cast and

resume fucking. Yeah, finally. Okay, yeah. Let's all get out of here. Let's go fuck. Yeah, bust our nut. Bust those nuts. I'm gonna bust my own nut for once. Same. I'm gonna bust my own nut. Let's get out of here. We gotta go masturbate. Alright, bye. Bye.

Daphne Caruana Galizia was a Maltese investigative journalist who on October 16th, 2017, was assassinated. Crooks Everywhere unnerves the plot to murder a one-woman WikiLeaks. She exposed the culture of crime and corruption that were turning her beloved country into a mafia state. Listen to Crooks Everywhere on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. To listen to new episodes one week early and 100% ad-free, subscribe to the

iHeart True Crime Plus channel, available exclusively on Apple Podcasts. Curious about queer sexuality, cruising, and expanding your horizons? Apple Podcasts. Sniffy's Cruising Confessions. Sniffy's Cruising Confessions will broaden minds and help you pursue your true goals. You can listen to Sniffy's Cruising Confessions, sponsored by Gilead, now on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. New episodes every Thursday. Señora Sex Ed is not your mommy's sex talk. This show is la plática like you've never heard it before.

We're breaking the stigma and silence around sex and sexuality in Latinx communities. This podcast is an intergenerational conversation between Latinas from Gen X to Gen Z We're your hosts, Diosa and Mala You might recognize us from our first show, Locatora Radio Listen to Señora Sex Ed on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts