The Daily Show: Ears Edition - The Washington Post Exposes Nonstop Lies About the War in Afghanistan | Lupita Nyong'o

Episode Date: December 12, 2019

The Washington Post reveals official lies about the Afghan War, and Lupita Nyong'o discusses her role in "Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker" and her children's book "Sulwe." Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Go to Ad's Manager. Paramount.com. That's ADS Manager. Paramount.com to learn more. Do nice guys really finish last. I'm Tim Harford, host of the Cautionary Tales podcast, and I'm exploring that very question. Join me for my new mini-series on the Art of Fairness. From New York to Tahiti, will examine villains undone by their villainy. Monstrous, self-devaring egos and accounts of the extraordinary power of decency. Listen on the IHeart Radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. December 11th, 2019. From Comedy Central's World News Headquarters in New York. This is the David Show everybody.

Thank you so much for tuning in. And thank you for coming out. As always, thank you so much. Let's do it. I'm Trevinoa. Our guest tonight is one of my favorite actors in the whole wide world. And she's my best friend, but she doesn't know it. Lupita Nongo is here, everybody!

We're going to be talking about her New York Times best-selling children's book and the new Star Wars movie she's in. Also on tonight's show, we find the worst place to have your wedding. Ronnie Chang sees dead people and the US government admits it's been lying to you. So let's catch up on today's headlines. Let's kick it off with Time Magazine's Person of the Year. It's an annual message to the world's other 7.7 billion people that you suck. And this year's honoree is an obvious choice. This would just announce moments ago, the Time Person of the year is 16-year-old climate change activist Greta Tuneburg.

Now you remember when the Swedish team took on UN world leaders at the Climate Change Summit, maybe 16 years old, congratulation to her. She had a passionate plea garnering a lot of attention. And for way too long, the politicians and the people in power have gotten away with not doing anything at all to fight the climate crisis and the ecological crisis. But we will make sure that they will not get away with it any longer. Yeah. Greta Toomburg has been named Time Magazine's Person of the Year. And she must have been so excited when they told her it was like, great news getter, Greta, we're going to cut down a million trees and print your face on them. And then we're going to put them on airplanes and send them all over the world.

For real though. It's so cool to be named Person of the Year while you're still in high school, right? All the other kids are like, oh, I was voted most likely to succeed and Greta slapping her magazine like, I already succeeded, bitch. Plus, you realize now she doesn't have to fill out a college application. Yeah, she could just show them this. Although, it is going to be awkward when she sends it to Harvard, and they're like, and th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, is going to be awkward when she sends it to Harvard, and they're like, wait a second, Aunt Becky told us her daughter was person of the year. All right, let's move on. If you're about to get married, first of all, it's a trap, get out now! And also, you should probably think very carefully when choosing your wedding venue.

And the popular wedding planning site, Pinterest and the, they both announced that they are no longer promoting content for plantation-style weddings. The wedding trend has been widely slammed for romanticizing the history of slavery. And spaces that were intentionally created for slavery. So that our ancestors could be forced to work and do free labor. These are spaces that not only are, it's not that slavery, these spaces were created for slavery. Yes, wedding planners have come under fire for promoting weddings at plantations.

Because people are saying it ignores what plantations were created for, slavery. And I'll be honest, I don't even get it. Like, why would you want your wedding at a place associated with slavery? Unless you're trying to send a message about your marriage. You know? Just like, yeah, I want to get married somewhere that reminds me that my freedom is over. And I'm going to have to obey someone for the rest of my life. You know, the one good thing about a plantation wedding

is that it's the perfect excuse for people who don't want to go to your wedding? Yeah. Because you can just pretend it's a moral stand. Hey, I'd love to be the to be the to be the the the the tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho th love to be there, but I can't attend a wedding where people were enslaved, you know, at a place where people were enslaved. It's like, you know what, you're right, we're moving our wedding to our backyard. Oh, on land that was stolen from Native Americans. And I guess we're not getting married? Oh, that's sad. I really wanted to come. All right, that's it for the headlines. Let's on to our top story. The war in Afghanistan.

It's basically the great anatomy of wars. We all thought it ended years ago, but somehow it's still going strong. And now, with the war in its 18th year, we're learning for the first time how badly Americans have been played. Tonight, newly released documents raised serious questions about whether the American people were lied to, about the progress of the war in Afghanistan, the longest in our history. A massive new trove of confidential documents obtained by the Washington Post reveals U.S.

officials systematically lied to the American public about the Afghan war, virtually since the beginning, 18 years ago. The objective to conceal widespread fears that America was losing. about the Afghan war virtually since the beginning 18 years ago. The objective to conceal widespread fears that America was losing. The rosy picture that's been painted by our political and military leadership is not the real picture on the ground. Yes, for 18 years, the American government has been painting a rosy picture telling Americans everything has been going great in Afghanistan, when in reality, it's a total shit show.

It's basically the technique every failing couple uses on Instagram. It's just like, hashtag date night, hashtag couple goals. Sends, like, are you done with your phone now? Well, if you didn't smile so shitty, I wouldn't have to take so many pictures, you pictures you dick I hate you I hate you more let's do one more in portrait mode ah but yes we're now learning from this bombshell Washington Post expose that the government manipulated every detail about the war in Afghanistan they used numbers they couldn't back up they hyped small successes when they knew the big picture was getting worse and they even tried to spin suicide bombings

as a sign of success, which is confidence, if nothing else. It's like making a tinder profile that says, you know I'm a catch because I have my own room in my mommy's basement. Swipe right! Now, it's not unusual for governments to try and make things seem like they're going well in the war when they aren't. But what makes the story, even more egregious, was wasthat they lied about even having a plan. It says blunt as can be. We didn't know what we were doing. We didn't know exactly why we were there or how we could get out and not a soul could define victory.

Retired General Douglas Lute, the Afghan War Zarr, saying in 2015, what are we trying to do here? We didn't have the foggiest notion of what we were undertaking. We didn't have a strategy. We the the the the thuuuuuuuuuuuuan thuan the thuan thuan tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho thi. thi thi tho tho thi. We didn't th. We didn't th. We th. We didn't th. We didn't th. We didn't th. We didn't th. We didn't th. We didn't th. We didn't th. We didn't the th. We the the the th. We the the the th. We the the th. We th. We the th. We thi. We thi. We thi. thi. the the the the the the the the thean thean thean thean thean thean thean the the the the the the the the trying to do here? We didn't have the foggiest notion of what we were undertaking We didn't have a strategy. We didn't even know who the enemy was Who were we there to fight? Wow America sent its troops to Afghanistan for 18 years and they didn't even know who they were going to fight? It's not how you go to war. That's that's a strategy of a group of drunk dudes who going out in Boston. You know. It's, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi- thi- thi-------------a, we thi, we thi, we thi, thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thin thin, thin, thin, thin, thin thin thin thin thin thin thin thi thi thi thin thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi how you go to war. That's a strategy of a group of drunk dudes who going out in Boston. You know, it's just like, someone's getting f-feeked up tonight, bro. Who? I don't know, probably us. But basically, part of the problem is that the people in charge didn't know how to define victory in Afghanistan. All right? Was it beating the Taliban or beating Al-Qaeda? Making the country a democracy?

And if you don't know how to end it, then you should just wrap it up and get out, you know, like they did with Game of Thrones. She's dead, he's gone, the bird kid is king. Roll the credits, roll the credits, take the money. But these people stretched it out. And this report shows that America's America's that America's that America's that America's that America's that America's the government's that America's their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the there was one thing, they had plenty of money.

The problem is, as any rapper will tell you, more money, more unnecessary expenditures. Aid workers in the field, military officers, diplomats. They all said this was more money than they could possibly spend, that they were ordered by Congress and officials back in Washington to spend, spend, spend as quickly as they could, as much as they could. Nearly a billion dollars on helicopters and planes for the Afghans. Trouble is, there is serious doubt that the Afghans can fly them.

A half million of your dollars wasted on a building that melted four months after it was built. 34 million dollars went to a soybean growing project and soybeans don't grow in Afghanistan and people in Afghanistan don't eat soybeans. The Pentagon wasted millions on uniforms for the Afghan army. It was to buy a forest camouflage pattern. Forest cover only 2% of Afghanistan. Okay that is just insane. 28 million dollars for forest camouflage in a country that's all desert. The only that that the only thate tho-moa that tha th and people and people and people and people th and people th and people than and people than and people that than and people that that that that that that that that that that tho-mo-mo-mo-mo-mo-in and people in people in people in people in people in that that th and people in people in people in people in people in people in people in people in people in people in people in people in people in people in people in people in people in people in people in people in people in people in people in people in people in people in people in people in people in th th and people in th and people in th and people in th and people in that that their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the their their the their thoe thoe thoe tho-n. tho just insane. $28 million for forest camouflage in a country that's all desert. The only way that could have been a bigger waste is if it was for Forest Whittaker camouflage. Yeah, at least that would have confused the people.

Mahmoud, we're being invaded by the guy from Wakanda! Don't shoot, don't shoot, I want his autograph, the strength of the black panther. So America spent nearly two trillion dollars on the war war war war war war to the war to to to to the war the strength of the Black Panther. So America spent nearly $2 trillion on the war in Afghanistan with basically nothing to show for it. And maybe that's how you get the US government to put money into things like health care or teachers. That's what Americans should do. Just tell them the Taliban is there.

Yeah. Then Congress will be like, the Taliban is attacking schools. Give them more money, give them as much money as they need. And send in three farce-witics just in case. Do it! Now, you might be thinking, who did this to us, Trevor? Who can we be mad? Is it Trump? Is it Bush? Is it Obama? Because I didn't want to say anything, but I think he's black? Well, actually, the answer is, all of the above. U.S. officials have misled the American people about the conflict across three administrations,

with decades of upbeat presidential pronouncements about the war. Our progress is a tribute to the spirit of the Afghan people and to the might of the United States military. Here, in the pre-dawn darkness of Afghanistan, we can see the light of a new day on the horizon. Great progress is being made, the spirit, and I'm hearing it from everybody, everybody that goes over comes back and said, really, it's like a different place. Yeah, it turns out that Bush, Obama and Trump all did their part to exaggerate America's success in Afghanistan. And I I guess that's the silver lining in the story. thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. th. th. th. thuui. thui. thui. thu. thu. thu. thu. thui, thui, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. th. th. th. th. their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their their their their, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. the. the. thean. thean. thean. toge. the. the. the. thee. thei. the. the. that's the silver lining in the story.

In a country increasingly divided every day, it's nice to learn that there's one issue that brings America's leaders together, lying about war. We'll be right back. to the toobey. to be to'e. John Stewart here, unbelievably exciting news. My new podcast, The Weekly Show. We're going to be talking about the election, economics, ingredient to bread ratio on sandwiches.

Listen to the weekly show with John Stewart, wherever you get your podcast. Welcome back to the Daily Show. My guest tonight is an Academy Award-winning actor who can be seen in the highly anticipated Star Wars, The Rise of Sky Walker. She's also written a children's book called Sulue. Please welcome Lupita Nongo. Welcome back to the show. Thank you very much. And let's start by saying congratulations on all of your nominations.

How many nominations you have? Welcome back to the show. Thank you very much. And let's start by saying congratulations on all of your nominations. How many nominations you have? Because sometimes I feel like like Instagram is just repeating a post. And then I realize you've, no, you've gotten nominated for another thing. What's your latest nomination now?

The Screen Actors Guild. That's for us. Yes. Yes. Yes. Are you a little bit worried that when you go to accept your award, you are going to kidnap you and then go accept the ward on your behalf? It's like a tiny, like how do we know it's, how do we know you're U-Night right now? Do you ever think of that? All the time. Welcome back to the show. Thank you for having.

Let's start off by talking about Star Wars. new movie coming out. Maz-K-K-K-Nata. Mazkanata is your character. Yes. And you're coming back again. These are the most secrets of movies, though. Like, the trailer doesn't give anything away, which I enjoy. They don't let you tell us anything. Yeah.

Like, why are we here? Well, you know, uh, I don't know. I don't know, but it seems to work every time. It works every, yeah, because the movies are amazing, but then like you can't tell me anything. Like normally I can ask you like what happens in a story? And I can't like, would this happen or that happen? I can't see it. Like nobody knows what's going to happen? It's like lock and keep. question maybe you can't tell us what's baby Yoda like is he in is he in the

movie you know there's another story you know I know almost as much as you do to be very honest they give you just what you need to know right so I'm curious as well I can't wait is it because they want you to go and watch the movie as well I think so I think so that they're that hard press cash yeah yeah Disney is just hardcore they like they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they th th they th th th th th th th th th th th th the thi th thi thi the the the th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the the the the thi thi thi thi to thi to to to to to to to to to to to to the thi to to thi thi thi th like, no, Lu Peter, you're going to come and watch the movie. You're going to part. But it must be, it must be really special for you being a part of such a major franchise. I mean, you've done so many epic films. You're an Oscar-winning actor, but at the same time you're part of Star Wars.

Was that something you thought about when that? franchise ever. It never occurred to me, I have to admit. And I watched Star Wars growing up, but I didn't know that it was a cultural phenomenon. You know, I just liked C3PO, it just come on on public holidays, you know? So it was a public holiday movie. And then I got cast. Wait, wait, wait, which country was the same? In Kenya? Wait, so in Kenya, Star Wars is a public, is a public, is a public, is a public, is a public, is a public, is a public, is a, is a, is a, is a, is a, is a, is a, is a, is a, is a, is a, is a, is a, is a, is a, is a, is a, is a, is a, th. th. thi. thi, th. th. thi. thi, thi, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th...................................................................................................................................... in Kenya, Star Wars is a public holiday movie. Yeah, it would come on on the public holidays.

That's rock and roll. No, because most countries would play like those old black and white films where it's just like someone saving Christmas or something. And you guys are like, no, we are doing Star Wars. We're doing Star Wars. Yeah, so I really liked, I liked the movie. Yeah, so I liked I liked, I, I, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I like, I liked I liked I liked I liked I liked I liked I liked. I liked. I liked I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked, I liked, I liked, I liked, I liked, I liked, I liked, I liked, I liked, I liked, I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked. I liked th. I liked th. I liked th. I liked th liked th liked th liked th liked th liked th liked th liked th liked th liked th liked th. I liked th liked th. I got cast in Star Wars, and my brother cried. And that's when I was like, OK. And then I was watching, what is it?

Whose line is it anyway? And I realized that Star Wars, it was pervasive in all popular culture. Because one of the questions was like, oh, you're Darth Vader. And I was like, wow, like, everyone is all about Star Wars. Yes. And then there was this big splash about me being a part of it. And I was like, oh, oh, shit. Let me ask you this, that is there a part of you that's happy that your character is like a, like you wear the, the dark things and you do the acting, I am so glad. Because then you don't have, because Star Wars fans are like, the best, the best, the best, th, th, th, the best, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, their, is, thi, is, th, th, and then, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, and, and, thi, and, thi, and, and, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, they. And, like, like, they. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi.? I am so glad. Because then you don't have so, because Star Wars fans are like the best fans in the world,

but they will chase you. They're intense. And they'll chase you with lightsabers to get like a selfie. Yeah, but they don't, like a lot of people might not know that you're in the movie. Yeah, the real buffs know that I'm in. Star Wars fans don't. So I get away with being in it and also not being in it, which I like a lot. I like that you are also in like it's not just Star Wars, but then at the same time you're in Black Panther as well. So it's like these major, like do you ever get confused though when

you're in epic movies? Like do you in the middle of Star Wars was like Mars just doing this? And then people like, what are you doing? Ha ha ha ha ha ha. That's crazy. It will be amazing though. Well, Kanda is kind of specific. And so is the galaxy far, far away, you know? Let me ask you this though. Okay, so when you're doing Mars, are you in like a sound booth?

Well, yeah, this time, in the past I've done, I've done the motion capture. This time I just did her voice and they had an animatronics do the role. So then you, like, do you just like do it? You just wake up and then you just go in and do the voice? Yeah, I go in. Do you dress as her? Do you have to like get in? Because you don't, you're the character, but we, but we, but, but, but, but, but, but, we, we, we, we, the, the, the, the, to, to, the, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, the, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, the, the, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, do, to, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, the, the, the, do, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, the, the, the, the, the, the like those headphones things of the... goggles? Yes. Yep, yep, that's all in the booth waiting for me. Just to feel like, no, it is not true.

None of this is true. Let's get that straight. I'm not a crazy person. No, I go in there and I go in there and you know, and I get in there and they're like, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, the, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, th, th, tho, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th...... th. the, the, thr, thr, thr. thr. thr. that, that's, thro, thro, that, thro, that, that, tho. th what you should have done and if you do another Star Wars movie because they don't tell you what's going to happen, you should just stretch the run down. So they go, okay, this is how, they've just been a battle and now you're like, what was, what happens after the battle? And then you should get the whole movie. And I'm writing it down. Yeah, and th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th tho tho, that that that tho, tho, tho, tho, tho tho tho tho tho that, that, that, that, that, that, tho, tho, th th th th th th th th, th th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the, the, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, they that, that, they they're that, that posted on Instagram. And then Disney's like Lupita, we need to speak to you.

Let's talk about the book now. Yes. We know Lupita Nyongo as an award-winning actress, and now we should know Lupita Nyongo as a New York Times best-selling author. Congratulations. Thank you. The book has received many accolades. Soule is a beautiful story about a young girl who has dark skin unlike some of the other members of her family.

They're all black people but with different shades and she's the darkest. And what's really cute is like it's a story of how she doesn't like her skin and the kids tease her in school and then she comes to learn through the magic of the stars why her skin is also beautiful. Yeah. It's a story that is resonating with so many people, almost now more than ever. Why did you feel you need to tell the story,

especially to children? Well, because I lived this. This is a very liberal autobiography. And I wanted to tell it to children because I they're the ones who really really really really really really hear it most. You know, they're at that impressionable age where they're figuring out who they are and what their value is in the world. And I wanted to get to that child before the world had told them what they were so they could figure it out for themselves. So one of the thingsk, things things things thi that's thi that's thi thi thi thi thi thi thi th this journey in the night sky, she figures it out for herself.

And I think that's an important message because you can't really control how the world is going to treat you, but you can control how you treat yourself. And hopefully when you can love yourself, you can change the world around you with the light that you shine. That's beautiful. I think I found it even more touching because I knew how personally you took the story. And you write about it in the back of the book, you know? It seems like a great kid's story, but then when you realize that this was your life,

you start to understand how much of an impact it makes on people. In fact, just recently, Miss South Africa won Miss Universe. I know, congratulations. No, and she was saying how, you know, even for her, seeing somebody of dark skin with natural hair and just being an African woman, being celebrated for her beauty, was a must.

A lot of people connected to that. If there is a child out there, or anyone, even a grownup who, who says, like, you know, Lupita, I've had dark scene for so long, people have said to me, I'm not beautiful because of that dark scene. Is there anything you did or changed or found in your life that helped you find the beauty that you actually always had? Woo! That's a good one. Anything that I did that helped me find myself really. Well, I think, what did I do?

I think I kept my imagination alive. I always fed my imagination, and that's where I found solace, and that's why it was so important that she had an imagination and went on his journey, because when you have an imagination, you can create for yourself the person you want to be. You can give yourself vision and it's so important to have vision because that's what can take you from where you are to where you need to be. So I think that's really important, but I think it's also about surrounding yourself with people who see the best in you, you know, and finding those people and holding onto them for dear life.

For me, I was lucky. My parents really believed in me and my parents, even when I didn't believe in myself or when I got teased by other people, my parents were steadfast in their love. And so even when I didn't want to hear it because it wasn't cool to listen to your mom, at the end of the day, shei, th, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, th, th, th, th, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, their, their, thin, thin, thi, thi, thi, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, their, their, their, their, their, to, toe, toea, toea, toea, toea, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, the end of the day she did not, my parents did not tire from reminding me of the things that I needed to know about myself and when the time came I could take that on and use it to move forward. And you've moved very far forward. Thank you so much I want to show again. Congratulations on everything. Star Wars, the ones the Star Wars, the Walsers, Star Wars, the Olupe and Taylor's the Senate 20th, and Sue Way is a beautiful book that's available now. Go ahead and get it.

Lupi Tanya, everybody. The Daily Show with Trevor Noah, Ears Edition. Watch the Daily Show weeknights at 11. 10 Central on Comedy Central and the Comedy Cecentral app. Watch full episodes and videos at the Daily Show weeknights at 11 10 Central on Comedy Central and the Comedy Central app. Watch full episodes and videos at the Daily Show.com. Follow us on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram and subscribe to skip this ad, but don't. Marketers want their audience to stick around. And with Paramount Ads Manager,

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I'm Tim Harford, host of the Cautionary Tales podcast, and I'm exploring that very question. Join me for my new mini-series on the Art of Fairness. From New York to Tahiti will examine villains undone by their villainy, monstrous self-devaring egos and accounts of the extraordinary power of decency. Listen on the I-Heart Radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts.