The Lazy Genius Podcast - #193 - What I Want To Do in My 40th Year

Episode Date: January 18, 2021

This is a year I want to pay attention to in ways I’ve never paid attention to a year before. So in today’s episode, I want to share some things I want to do in my 40th year, why that is, and maybe even give you a framework for seeing this next year with more intentional eyes, whether you’ll be turning forty or not. Stuff Mentioned Check out episode 191 Naming What Matters in 2021 if you missed it. Preorder Share Your Stuff. I’ll Go First by my friend Laura Tremaine. Renovation of the Heart by Dallas Willard The doors to Camp21 open on Thursday, January 21st! Check it out here. Download a transcript of this episode.   This post contains affiliate links, meaning if you click through and make a purchase, I may earn a small commission at no cost to you. Thanks for supporting my small business. This podcast is hosted by Kendra Adachi and executive produced by Kendra Adachi, Jenna Fischer and Angela Kinsey. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hi there. You're listening to the Lazy Genius Podcast. I'm Kendra Adachi and I'm here to help you be a genius about the things that matter and lazy about the things that don't. Today is episode 193, what I want to do in my 40th year. I have a late December birthday, so in about a year, I'll turn 40, which means I'm currently living my 40th year. It also happens to be 2021, a year that holds so much hope for me personally. This is a year I want to pay attention in ways I have never paid attention to a year before. So in today's episode, I want to share some things that I want to do in my 40th year and why that is and maybe even give you a framework for seeing this next year with more intentional eyes, whether you are turning 40 or not. First, why? Why does caring

about this particular year and what it holds matter to me so much? Because if I don't have a clear reason of why something matters, trying to follow through on it, it won't work ever. We have to know what matters and why, why we're doing things in order to do anything with purpose and enjoyment. If you are new around here, that is the whole thing about being a lazy genius. In order to be a genius about the things that matter, you need to know what matters. In order to have the space for that, to have the space for what matters, you need to know what doesn't matter. So you can be lazy about it, maybe even get rid of it. So why do I want to be a genius about how I spend my time in 2021 and my 40th year? Have you ever gotten rusty at something? Of course you have.

You know, you're good at something. You do it regularly. And then when you stop, you get rusty. You get out of rhythm or you lose some technique or you forget how much you liked the thing simply because you stop doing it for a while. I feel that way right now about being aware of who I am. I do not want to get rusty at that, which sounds kind of weird. So let me explain. I said this a couple of weeks ago in episode 191 called naming what matters in 2021. But 2020 was a crash course in naming what matters. With so much taken away, we had to be super in touch with what keeps us. going, right? We had to get creative about what matters, which solidified, at least for me, what really matters most, right? If you're going to put the effort into making something

work when the ways that it worked before were taken, it kind of shows its priority. Now, that practice of being so deeply in touch with what matters, it has significantly impacted my life. And I don't want to get rusty at that. I don't want to get rusty at paying attention to who I am, what I need, and how I can move into the world and offer myself to it in ways that make it better. I don't want to lose that. I don't want to get rusty at that. There's also a lot of hope connected to this next year for me. Not necessarily that everything will be back to normal because that's not really a thing. And we're definitely not even close to back to normal right now. but it's more about hope in having made it through something difficult and feeling like we are at a pivotal point as human beings as a country if you are a United States citizen or whatever your country is really but as a country as a citizenry as a world it sounds a little little woo-woo maybe but I feel this sparkle and an energy around this year and I am not going to ignore that

even with something as awful as the attack on the Capitol, I have watched us all become galvanized in what matters as a people committed to living together as citizens. We see what matters most when it is threatened. And that threat has not stopped. It's taken a lot of forms in the last 12 months. It took a horrible form a couple weeks ago. But that threat has not stopped. But I want to continue to be aware of what matters even in the face of those difficult things, maybe even especially in the face of those difficult things. I want to be joyful this year and do things I love and invite other people to pay attention to what they love. I want to offer hope and freedom and systems and all kinds of things in this space to help us embrace this next year in a way that feels purposeful

and human and unique based on who we all are. as individuals. I just feel really good about what I've learned and what we've learned and will continue to learn as people as we rebuild our regular lives and our systems and our neighborhoods and relationships and habits and all of it. It all just feels really important and special to me. And I want to pay attention to that. Also, the fact that I'm going to turn 40 in 2021 also feel significant. It's a real thing to mark your life in decades. I mean, 40 is a big birthday. it's it's fine that that's the case and I kind of feel it like I feel it in my bones um I mean my bones are getting older and more crackly but I mean I feel it in my bones and like a really beautiful

energetic way this year feels important to me and I just want to enjoy the momentum and excitement that I feel about it on purpose so in light of that I made a list of what I want to do in my 40th year and while I'm not sharing my list so that you'll copy it or because there's any sort of rule to it, I am sharing it because as I have learned from my friend Laura Tramaine, whose book comes out in two weeks, by the way, aptly named Share Your Stuff, I'll go first. It's important to share our stuff. I usually don't share a lot of personal stuff here on the podcast. I have a whole podcast episode dedicated to it just because that's not what this space is primarily for. But I do want to share this. I feel like it's important for me to share this.

I want to invite you to consider how you might move into this year with intention around even one thing to maintain whatever momentum or whatever practice 2020 sort of maybe even forced upon you. We can engage in that practice in this new year on purpose and maybe even do it together, which I have something fun. I want to tell you about at the end of this episode about doing it together, but we will hold off on that for Now, also a quick word about what landed on the list, what that process was if you want to go through your own. So two weeks ago in that naming what matters episode, I mentioned, I shared two things, only two things that matter to me this coming year. I mean, other things matter, but these are the

two things that matter most. You need to know what matters most. And they are to honor my body and to seek out and provide joy. Those are the two things that run the ship for me this year. A lot of things will follow, but those are what matter most. So in light of that, it was actually really easy and energizing to create this list. It feels like a list that's, you know, it's not a list of to-dos that I have to force myself to do. These are things that are in line with what matters to me. They're exciting to think about. And I have a lot of intention and vision for myself around those things. I think that's really, really important to name. I'm reading a book that is about spiritual formation. So it's not like a light read for everybody, but it's called Renovation of the Heart by Dallas Willard. And in this book, he talks about the acronym VIM, which stands for vision, intention, and means. You need all three to make progress or experience movement in something that matters to you. So I have a vision for who I want to continue to be this next year and how I want to further cultivate who I already am and grow and honor that person this year, especially as I move toward 40. I have that vision. I also have an intention to make it happen. And this list, even sharing it here is part of that. So all that's left is the means to do it. So guess what I'm going to do? I'm going to use lazy genius principles, like start small and build the right routine and schedule rest.

to make it happen. So them, do you have a vision for yourself in this year? Do you have intention to follow through what practices keep that vision alive? And then do you have the means to do it? I like this a lot better personally than smart goals because this feels more in line with simply supporting what matters to me right now in a way that isn't full of pressure or checklists or whatever else. There's nothing wrong with smart goals. Smart stands for, what is smart stand for you guys? It stands for specific, measurable. I don't remember what A is. Or R or T. This is really great content. But like, I don't remember what they all are. I don't remember what they are because they've never worked for me. So if that's the case for you, maybe them, maybe them will work

and we'll just apply some lazy genius principles to things that matter. Okay. So there are all my words about why I'm doing this. Now let me tell you what's on my list, what I want to do in my 40th year. RBC Training Ground has discovered potential in over 20,000 Canadian athletes and counting. Your story could be next. If you've got the drive, they'll help you find your path to the Olympics. Let's see what you've got. Sign up for free at rbc trainingground.ca. Aw, isn't something we need to travel for. It's something waiting for us in everyday life. whether in a city street or a moment with a work of art. I'm Dr. Keltner, host of the Science of Happiness podcast.

Join me for Cities of Aw, a special series on how our public spaces can spark awe, wonder, and enhance the quality of public life. You can find us wherever you listen to your podcasts. There are seven things I want to do. I immediately named this episode 10 Things because 10 is such a great list number. Laura Tremaid's podcast, I mentioned her a minute ago, her podcast is called 10 Things to

tell you because we all love the list of 10 things. It's the best. But I did not have 10. So I'm not going to force 10. I have 7. And I love my 7. The first one is I want to go on 150 walks in 2021. Now let me explain this. A couple of technical things. A walk by definition for me is going to be anything that is the equivalent of going around the block. It doesn't have to be long or fast. just a walk. But walks, as my beloved Aaron H. Moon, calls them stupid walks, they make a difference for me. They just do. And honestly, I don't even think of them as stupid walks. I actually love them. I love to go for a walk. I love them alone. I love them with a friend. I love them with my kids. I love them with music or without, with podcasts, or without around a block, around a lake of a

mountain. It doesn't matter. I really love going for a walk. I think taking running, of the table for me. It helps me here because I don't love to run. Running is good for my mental health, but it's not, I have glass nays, you guys. My joints are, they're awful. So it just kind of helps to sort of take running off the table. I might do it sometimes, but that's not the goal here. And this number of 150, it kind of evens out to about a walk every day and a half or so, which is super doable. And I kind of even do that now. but being intentional about it, being intentional about this thing that I really love doing, that both honors my body and it gives me joy. That is such a no-brainer. The speed, the location,

consistency, none of it is really significant to this. I just want to take 150 walks in 2021. And I'll mark each one off in my bullet journal because I still bullet journal. And it'll be simple and great. I'm really excited about making that a priority. in my 40th year of the year of 2021. Okay, number two, which is also connected to honoring my body is I want to do 40 hours of yoga in 2021, 40 hours. I shared this in that same episode I talked about and naming what matters. My body has really taken it hard in 2020, a lot of back pain, a lot of muscle pain.

It's just been rough. It's kind of the stress has manifested itself in my body. so I want to focus on keeping that at bay as much as I can. Now, 40 hours. Why 40 hours? Okay, so tons of yoga classes are an hour. So that's 40 classes. That's like less than one a week. That's not very much. Now, I don't go to yoga classes. I will likely not do yoga for an hour ever. It'll be a few minutes a day because I already kind of do that. But I know that my body will be honored by stretching it and moving it slowly and breathing and maintaining awareness of it in this next year, right? So having the 40 hours and slowly moving through them over the course of an entire year, it encourages those small steps. And it

prioritizes my body not hurting as much in 2021 as it did in 2020. So it could be I do it for 30 minutes and then it's just several weeks of five minutes every day or every other day. You know, like it doesn't matter. how much it is each day. We're just aiming for 40 hours. That's our target. And that feels good to me. It's really important. And it's really important that you don't require yourself to do something like yoga 20 minutes, three days a week, and then feel like you have to stick to that routine week after week. Because our routines shift week after week, right? That's why that kind of commitment rarely works for us. As we learned in the lazy genius way and the principle of building the right

routines, the point of a routine is to get you to a certain place. It's not about the steps necessary to get there. It's about where you're going and you can take different steps to get to that place. So saying that I am going to do yoga every Tuesday, it does not work for me. Now that is a path that could get me to 40 hours and to having my body feel better, but it's not the only path. Wanting to do 40 hours of yoga in 2021, it feels very different than, you know, 30 minutes every Tuesday or whatever. And it's still working toward an intention and a vision rather than it being just like a checklist

to try to become some ideal person or something. I'm just trying to take care of who I already am. That's all it is. Okay, number three. I have a list of books that I want to read in 20. 2021, but more than that, I want to read books that I know I will love. Not every year has to be a year to read outside of one's comfort zone. And this upcoming year is one where I want to always love the book that I am holding.

So that means reading books that have been recommended by humans who know what I like and have pushed a book into my hands saying, read this. I want to read a lot of those books this year. which means I will likely read a lot of dystopian world building books. They're my favorite. I will read funny memoirs. I will read ton of French. But this is not a year for stepping far out of my favorite genres. I just want to have a year of hunkering down with words that I know I love and that being okay for this year. I'm really excited about that. Now does that mean I'm not going to read things that are hard? Of course not. Or different than what I usually read? Not really. But the focus, the priority is to

stick with what I love and always have something like that either happening or on deck. Always. Okay, so number four is having a 2021 watch list. There are some shows that I want to finish that I've been talking about starting forever. And there are also some movies that are coming out that I want to see because of this whole massively amazing HBO Max thing that we have where they're just going to like stream movies on HBO Max. It's so fun. So, I often say that I want to see something, a show or a movie, but I don't because I don't make a plan, or I just don't have any purpose behind it. So this year, I have some things. I have a list, and this is the focus. So Ted Lassow, I want to watch Ted Lassow with Cause. We also,

together, he and I want to continue slowly and lovingly watching Schitt's Creek. It's so good. We're just taking it. I mean, we're like savoring it, like a fine wine. It's just the best. Other shows that he and I want to watch together are The Good Place and we want to finish The Mandalorian. On my own, His Dark Materials, Dairy Girls, Narcos, and Bridgeton. Those are my shows. I'm going to watch those before I watch anything else. Even if something crazy comes on that everybody's talking about, I want to focus on these because I'm excited about them and they matter right now, right? There are also some movies coming out that I'm excited about, but I'm not going to list them here.

Really, it just comes down to naming what matters. what you really want to do or see or experience, naming that so that you'll actually do it. And I'm doing that this year, even with the shows that I'm going to watch. Okay, number five is kind of a specific one. But I have been really interested for several months now in digging deep into Jesus's sermon on the mount. I kind of just want to park there for a really long time, like all year long, and just learn and listen and absorb. The sermon on the Mount is the one with the beatitudes, blessed are the meek,

blessed are the poor and spirit, if you have any familiarity with the Bible. But I feel like that message is just really resonant in my life right now. And so I'm going to spend a lot of time this year in that particular passage of the Bible and learn about it from people who are smarter than I am. And I'm just really excited to dig deep into that. So that one's like super specific, but it's on my list. Next up, number six, is that I want to host a big party, maybe two. Basically, as soon as the vaccine hits enough of the population and things are, you know, more or less back to normal, I am throwing a party. I am kind of obsessed with throwing parties if you're new around here.

And like I throw one to two pretty big parties like theme parties every year. Well, guess what? Kendra did not throw one in 2019, which was a problem. Little did I know that I would have to go so long before getting to throw it on. party. So that is going to be a priority for sure. Now, it might be my own 40th birthday party in December, depending on how long it takes for the United States to get back on track from a health perspective. But I'm totally fine with that. I will throw my own party, but a party is going to happen. And then finally, my number seven is I want to go to a Piny and Sparrow concert.

Now, this might not happen because who knows if musicians are, are going to be able to play music in public places by the end of this year. I mean, I'm hopeful, but I just don't know. But I'm going to hold on to that hope anyway. So Penny and Sparrow is my favorite band and they are the absolute best live. I've seen them live, you know, like at a concert one time. And then I bought a ticket for a live virtual concert that they did in 2020. It was so good. I just love them so much. And since live music is actually something that I have missed the most in 2020, and it is something that brings me tremendous joy. I will certainly make this a priority if Penny and Sparrow do a show somewhere.

Like I will fly all the planes to get to this concert. And that's my list. Now I want you to notice something. Everything on those, every one of those seven things, it either honors my body or it brings me joy or both. Everything. Everything. It all fits under what matters most for me in this year.

of 40, turning 40 in 2021. So nothing feels like a chore. Nothing does. It's so exciting. There's so much energy around it. I want to live with intention around things that give me energy, not things that bring me down because I feel like I should do them, which leads me to a very, very fun announcement. Okay. So this week on Thursday, January 21st of 2021. I am opening the doors to something I'm calling Camp 21. What is Camp 21? So Camp 21 is an online community that I made up. It's going to be amazing where we are going to walk through this year, 2021, together in an intentional way. We will name what matters and continue to make sure it stays the thing that matters. We will build around those things that matter.

on purpose day after day. So you can get all the details at the lazy genius collective.com slash camp 21 like with the numbers, not the letters. I'm just so, so stoked for this. With all that we learned in 2020, you know, we want to keep using those things, right? We want to name what we envision for our lives for 2021. And then we want a lazy genius our way to get there. And that's what Camp 21 is going to do. They're going to be. weekly pep talks. We're going to have monthly lazy genius sessions for people in the community. And then there's going to be a quarterly virtual workshop like every three months where we will gather for several hours. Like together, it's going to be so fun to work through our lazy

genius life handbook, which is a real thing that I made. Team lazy genius and my executive assistant Leah is like on it. It's been so fun. We are going to live 2021 on purpose like a lazy genius. I am so, so, so, so excited about this. Okay, so, so, so excited about this. Okay, so again, you can find all the details at the lazy genius collective.com slash camp 21, camp 21, or you can click the link in the show notes. Now, because it is a community and it is structured around each season, we will only take new campers for a couple of weeks at a time. So we don't want you to join in March when it's kind of like almost over for that season and you didn't get to walk the whole road with us. That's kind of a

bummer for you. So for a couple of weeks at the start of every season, so every three months, we'll open the doors again for new folks to join. And I super hope you are one of them. So again, the doors will open on Thursday, January 21st. And we'll send out an email to the mailing list. So if you are interested in getting information, you can go to the lazy genius collective.com slash join and get all the information there. Okay, that is all for today. Thank you so much for listening. And until next time, be a genius about the things that matter and lazy about the things that don't. I'm Kendra, and I will see you next week. Have you ever felt like you were living just a B or B plus life? It's so dangerous to live that more dangerous than a B minus or a C plus life because when you're

living a B or B plus life, you don't change it. You think it's good enough. Is it? I'm Susie Welch. I host a podcast called Becoming You. People think, okay, an A plus life is not available to me, but there is a way. We are all in the process of becoming ourselves. Listen to Becoming You wherever you get your podcasts.