Wednesdays - Do I fancy him - or do I just love the yearning? | DILEMMA DAY

Episode Date: August 27, 2026

It’s DILEMMA DAY with Melissa Tattam and Ruby Adler! This week the girls are tackling crushes, beauty secrets and keeping the spark alive when there are a few miles between you.First up, one Tiny has found herself in a slightly tricky situation… she fancies her friend’s brother! Is it worth making a move, or is she heading straight into dangerous territory? Then, the girls get into the VERY important business of getting silky smooth skin. Are we all missing a trick?!PLUS, one Tiny needs some help keeping things spicy in her long-distance relationship, and Ruby and Melissa have PLENTY of thoughts 👀Enjoy the episode xGot a dilemma, some personal advice for a fellow Tiny, or a follow-up to a previous one? Send us a voice note or message on Insta @wednesdayspodcast, or drop us an email at [e-mail] | @wednesdayspodcastTikTok | @wednesdayspodcastEmail | [e-mail] CREDITSProducer: Faye LawrenceAssistant Producer: Issy Weeks-HankinsVideo: Lizzie McCarthySenior Social Media Manager: Laura CoughlanSocial Media Executive: Amber HouriganSenior Producer: Helen Burke Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey, tiny's, it's Dilemma Day, and today we're getting into all of this. I desperately fancy my friend's brother. You see, if you desperately fancy him, then we must go for it. Isn't it not the best underwear ever? It's so, to the point where it's almost too sexy, just like we're out about, because like the G-strings. It's tiny. He held my hand under the blanket the entire time, like it was totally normal.

Shut! Up! Okay, guys, it's my favourite time. It's Dilemma Time. So we're going to kick off with Dilemma 1. Hi, Queens. Okay, so I need some serious advice. I desperately fancy my friend's brother. We'll call him Jack. Oh my God, we were talking about this the other day.

We'll call him Jack. Even though his name starts with a J, he is a good egg, I promise. Jack and I have known each other for years through my friend, his sister, and there has always been this undeniable tension between us. For context, I am 21 and he is 23 older brother vibes. I love it. Perfect, perfect age gap. Also gorgeous two years, I love it.

He flirts with me constantly. It's so obvious even our mates have started commenting on it. Last week we were all watching a film and he held my hand under the blanket the entire time. Shut! Shut! Ah! She goes, my heart could not coat. Oh my God, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. That's Fanny Flatocentral.

I can't. I've got tingles. Here's my issue. I can't work out if I actually like him or if I just sounds like me. Or if I just love the drama and the will they won't they have it all. The secrecy, the tension, the fact it's a bit forbidden because I... Oh, stop. Because he's my friend's older brother.

It's just all so exciting. But is that excitement actually about him? or am I just addicted to the chase? I haven't said anything to my friend because I don't want to make it weird and I definitely haven't said anything to Jack because I genuinely wouldn't know even what to say. Please help. Do I sit Jack down and ask him what on earth is going on?

Do I talk to my friend first or do I just enjoy the flirty chaos and see where it goes? I love you. I think you've just got to snog him. And then you'll like know if you feel something and if you want to do it again. And like a kiss is a kiss. But then is... Do you know what I mean? A kiss is a kiss.

Like a kiss and like you might also, that might also give you the clarity you want because you might be like, that felt so weird and I don't want to do that again. And then it's kind of like, fine, I think I was just addicted to the chaos and the like fun of that.

Whereas you might kiss him and be like, I really want to kiss him again. And then you speak to the friend, but I also think that like... But is she going to be in trouble for not speaking to the friend before the kiss? I wish you told me first. But then imagine how I felt full.

So annoying. So hard. But imagine if she spoke to the friend, said something, and then realized that she didn't like him. I'd be like, well, you've all hyped us up for nothing. That's also true. And it's like, well, now I started thinking that you, like, I feel like she almost needs to be like, not 100%, but like a bit more confident than she is now before speaking to the friend if she's wanting to pursue something. I would just hate it if my friend's like fancy or brother, but actually I would love it. Also, we've spoken about this before.

We've spoken about this so many times. He also said that to each other right, each other's brothers. Like in a jokey way, but also like would be fine with it if it was going to, like, that wouldn't have offended me whatsoever. I think Melissa's brother like, obviously when I was single, I was just like, he's good looking. Yeah, we used to admire each other's siblings so much and we'd be like, well, you know, for the time we rose, we'd definitely explore that. Like, low-key joking. But like, I wouldn't mind if you did. Like, that would never have annoyed me.

No, it would never have annoyed me. So I think you have to try and gauge, I think as though I did make that quite clear to you. I was always like, yeah, go for it. You were always like that. I don't. It's hard. It depends on what your friend's going to, how she's going to react. I know, because you've not given us anything with this.

Is she like seeing this too and is like kind of like egging you on? I think it makes it a bit easier if she was because you're saying that all your friends, it's so obvious. Even our mates have started commenting on it, but you haven't let us know, has she said anything? Has she made a comment? And then I feel like if she's positive, then it gives you the right to explore it. It gives you the right with the green light. I agree. You're also all so young.

Oh, it's the perfect age for this sort of shit to happen. It's honestly, this is that fucking perfect age for this sort of like messy, but not that mess. Like, not that much for a big deal. But at the time, like, oh, you're so consumed. The whole thing, the hand under the blanket. No, and I just know that feeling of, like, that no one can see.

And, like, this is, like, kind of forbidden, but, like, this is so fun. See, if it was me, the fact that you're like, I'm not sure if I like him or if it's just the forbidden fruit thing. Makes me think you don't. Yeah, because I would be like, I love you. Like if someone genuinely I would be like, oh my God, this is it. Yeah, I agree. I would just be completely obsessed.

So I feel like actually. I think the same. You like the attention, but you don't really like him. I think so too. Which is a shame. I want you to explore this because it sounds unreal. But yeah, I just think that you're liking the attention a little bit and that's really as far as it goes. But then also like he might really like you.

So if it is just the attention that you think you like Then you don't He's just flirting with you in front of everyone as well It's so fair He's obviously doing that also in front of his sister So maybe he's said to his sister like Quite fancy Honestly I'd like a photo please of Jack and you

God I would have really appreciated a vision made on this Imagine if he's just this stunning like Listen if he's fit you should just kiss him anyway I agree You obviously do fancy him bit though Because otherwise you'd be so repulsed by him holding your hand You'd be like oh stop Yeah you also

You want him to hold your hand. You're like, you said my heart could not cope. Those were your words. I'm very confused by you because I don't know what. She's also started with I desperately fancy my friend's brother. So if you desperately fancy him, then we must go for it. Yeah, I agree. But listen, I think to be on the safe side, we need to gauge what your friend is saying

and then be like, I don't know what's going on, but like I genuinely like, I'm growing quite strong feelings to your brother and I don't really not to do about it. Yeah. Just see what then she says? Let us know, girl. I really hope she's okay with it. I really hope so too. It just gives you free range.

Just dip your toe in. It's easier for everyone. And then you could do it without feeling like any form of guilt. And like you obviously don't want to fall out with your friend. You just want to be honest and open. And then if people have problems with it, at least no one's like lied. I think that just makes it ten times worse. You know when you fancy someone in a particular surrounding and then you take them out of that surrounding, like, she might be.

might see him on the date. Like, it might be fun and fit because, like, he's the older brother. And then actually remove him from being the older brother and you put him in, like, a boyfriend category or someone that you're dating and you're like, not sure. It's like when you're at an old girl's school and there's a gaffy in it and he's not even that fit, but everyone's like, oh my God, there's a man. Yeah. Well, I think you've got to explore. I don't think you desperately fancy him. Like, either you've got the feels or you don't. Yeah. They're there. I think it's worth a try. I agree. Okay, well, good luck. Okay, dole and me too.

Hey, girl, this is such a random thing to ask, but I know you girls will have the answer. I'm on a mission to get the smoothest legs of my life this year. No bumps, no ingrowing hairs, none of the dreaded strawberry skin. I've tried shaving. I've tried deflating. I've tried every scrub going and nothing seems to fully crack it. What's actually worked for you, girls? Is it worth splashing on laser?

Is there a secret exfoliating trick I'm missing? Are there any products you recommend? I need to know everything. Thanks, girls. Love you. Okay, love you too. I love questions like this. This is girlhood.

This is girlhood. I'm going to say, I've been having lazy since I was 16 and I think it's the best thing ever. I mean, I'll go genuinely a month without doing anything and there's just never really any hair. Yeah, it's great. I also do laser. I haven't been doing it for as long as Melissa, but right, my God, I think it's great. And also, when I was 16, they were a bit shit. Now they're freaking strong and they don't even hurt. I think it's great. I also think that there are things you can't. I think if you can do laser, and it's something that's really bothering you, as in like the consistency of your legs, I would try it and see how you get on.

But I also think product-wise, I think it depends on what razors. The estrid razors. Estrid all the way. Also, they're so pretty. They're so pretty in the bathroom. They're really affordable. You know, they're cheaper than every other razor? Yeah, they are.

They're cheaper than Gillette. It's cheaper than everything. I agree. It's way nice. It's made out metal. It's gorgeous. You'll have it for ages. You don't have to change the head as, like, some.

So I much prefer it. I agree. I much refer it. So I would really strongly suggest you get an estrid razor and buy a few heads for it. Yeah, you just buy a box of heads. At one point I did have it on subscription, but then I wasn't shaving enough and I got too many. Yeah. But you can just buy a box of heads, keep it under your sink.

Yeah. I wouldn't necessarily bother with a scrub that, like, you can use because you can spend a lot of money on that. I would just buy a glove and replace it every, like, four months. Yeah. An exfoliative. What? What do you do with the glove? It's like an exfoliating glove.

Like a lufor, but I got it. Or a lufor, like a, maybe a lufers actually a little bit better for you and nicer not to pick your hand in a mitt. Yeah, like use a lovely luther. And I would just, every time you shower, not too scrubbing hard, but you definitely exfoliate because it helps with when the skin grows back. It prevents like ingrowns and stuff like that. Also, Nurturium do this like 5% body wash, which is like...

Salic acid, which is good for like... Really good. helps prevent all of that stuff. Breakouts, ingrown hairs, great for just like, um... It just exfoliates the skin, and I think it's great. It's like a really lovely blue bottle. And it also, you get so much product again. I think it's under 20 pounds. Like it's... It's actually a really good shout. I do have that as well. And it's great. I get my laser done. I pay for it. I pay for my two. I go to 70 Mortimer Street. Yeah. And, um, it's called Pulse Laser. It's not Pulse Light Laser. Pulse Laser, 17, Mortimer Street.

and they have a new laser machine. So I started off my course on the one that they had before. Then they got a new machine. Do they bring you off each time? On the lights. I think it depends on like how tan down. I actually haven't done it in like a year. But like I'll go back for like,

I'll do like three blips a year just to like top up everywhere. But yeah, they have a new laser machine. So if you're going to go there, request to have their new machine because my God it's so much stronger. like so much stronger. Okay, I love that. And if you're going to be charged at the same price, you want to make sure that you're paying for,

like getting the better machine. Absolutely. That's my advice. I think it's really worth the money. I mean, you see all these girlies doing, also you can get at-home lasers that are really good. Yeah, you really can. So I would also look into that and consider it.

I don't know who does a really good one. I used to use Kenzie during lockdown when I couldn't get to my laser if I'm bloody good. Like really good. Don't fool for the scam of the no. growing back. Oh my god, it will grow back. It grows back a lot finer and it takes a lot longer. No, no, this oil is the people are spending by. So my friend bought one and it got scammed on TikTok. It's like this oil that you put on your freshly shaven skin. Oh, I've seen all this. It's

like, it doesn't, it stops your hair from growing back. So she bought it. We had a right laugh and she was telling us about this fantastic ball. TikTok shops a real hole. It can be amazing, but you need to check you the salad up. Yeah, I agree. So she bought this oil thinking, She was raving to our skies before this oil. Like, the reviews are so good. And I was like, surely if that really worked, like everyone would be using it? Are you sure the reviews good?

She was like, yeah, yeah. She gets up her phone. She reads out the review and it's like, this is a scam. Writing on the bottle doesn't even make sense and isn't even spelt correctly. We were all pissing ourselves. She goes downstairs.

Everything is spelt completely wrong. It's called like silky confidence instead of silky confidence. And like the ingredients What's the brand? I don't know. It's something. something fake. So don't fool for those things because I don't think it will.

Oh, gosh. Okay. So like, you're about to put that on your fucking bikini line. Yeah, no, I would be careful what you're putting down there. Also, skit moisturiser. If you want a good body moisturiser, I've been using this tropic moisturiser. They sent it to me. I've been using their suncream for years. Okay, this stuff, it's all non-toxic. Topic. I love tropic. It's 10-10. Well, I've only used the sunscreen. I haven't used that body cream. Right. They have this body cream. It's like coconut and something. Oh, I love coconut. Anything coconut. The smell is so delicious.

It's like whipped, buttery consistency. It's like whipped. I've never used it like it. It's greasy, but in a really good way. Oh my God. It's like the nicest body cream I have ever used. Okay. I've got to get it.

Genuinely sensational. Tobi and I are like, oh my God, like lathering this shit on like every night. I love it. So I'm going to get the tropic body cream when I leave. What am I buying? You haven't given me any tips. Gatekeeper over there. Something from Chanel me.

I'm joking. I'll come back to you, Tim. Okay, dilemma number three. Hi, Ruby and Melissa. I need some help and I know you girls were the perfect people to come to for advice. So my boyfriend and I have been together for over three years and honestly our sex life's always sex life. It's always, it's always me. So my boyfriend and I have been together for over three years and honestly our sex life has always been really healthy.

The problem is he's been living in Finland for work for over a year now and I live in Manchester. so we're doing the long-distant thing and it's hard. We send the odd sexy pick back and forth to keep things ticking along, but if I'm honest, I'm running out of ideas and it's starting to feel a bit repetitive rather than exciting. We see each other in person every few months. Oh, that's so hard. That's hard, but I want to keep that spark-l-eye between visits too,

not just saving up for when he's at home. How do you keep intimacy exciting over a long distance without it feeling like a chore? Any tips for spicing things up beyond the standard photo exchange? We do love each other so much. We really want to make this work until he's back for good. Lots of love anonymous. I think the good thing is he is going to come back. You have to.

I thought this was going to be like your life for the rest of time. And I was like, I just don't think that's sustainable. I don't think it's sustainable either. How long are we doing the long distance thing for again? She hasn't actually said. Time girls. I know. They've been together for over three years.

So he obviously moved away. I'm assuming it's a recent thing. But it also doesn't sound like it's a forever thing. So that's got to keep you going. But seeing each other every few months sounds hard, especially when Finland isn't that far from the UK. Like, that's a short flight. Yeah, Timmy's flying back and forth from Australia more than that.

That's the first thing where my brain goes. I'm like, but I'm coming back every few months from Oz. So, like, you can make it work. But that's not the point and that's not what she's asking. Maybe you need to fly back a few more times, genuinely. I'm thinking that like that, let me Google it, London to Finland. How long is it? I'm guessing two hours.

Not long. London to Finland. Maybe it's like three hours because I feel like Finland's not on the map. It's two hours, 45. Okay, well she wants tips on how to keep it exciting. I think... Spontaneous flights over. You could just surprise him.

Yeah. And you could surprise him honestly in the sexiest, like laundry. Don't. Let's live out that dream of the old like Rain Mac. Yes. Like to turn up at the door in a trench. Okay, a trench. With like sexy laundering.

Can I just say skims do the sexiest? I love skims. Underwear. I bought for some reason when I was really hung over my way back from Andorah on a ski trip just in the back of this taxi I was so hung over and I just bought loads of skims underwear I don't know what happened to me. Is it not the best underwear ever? It's so to the point where it's almost too sexy to like wear out of about because like the G-strings

is tiny. They're amazing. I also have this like it's like this pair of knickers that like has like a like a sort of has a hole on the butt. Like, I don't know, that's maybe like, maybe giving wrong idea. But like, they really have just like quite different, gorgeous, sexy, modern underwear. Yeah, I agree. I think that's quite difficult to find.

It's so hard. I literally wear skims, seamless thong, every day. Same. It's just perfect for everything. Yeah. But they have just come out with all this sexier stuff. I don't own the sexier stuff. Yeah, and people don't know that they do it.

I don't think. It seems to be everyone goes for the basics, which is obviously what she, like, created it for, right? She's opening on Oxford Street. She's opening this huge flagship store. Is that taking her from Topshop? Where Topshop was? No, that's IKEA now. And I think she's opening nearer Apple, so the other way.

So good. And she's got this huge store. I love skims. I think... We are huge fans of skimms. It's also, like, not a fortune. It's like fairly affordable. I agree.

I think to find the underwear, well, the sexy lacy stuff... It's probably a bit more expensive. It is, but you know what I love about it? So she's made it. So the gusset is always made out of cotton most of the time, which is much healthier for us girly. Okay, it's breathable. Then the rest of it is all lacy and sexy, which is really fat. I agree. Take some, like, some joy in that. Like, that's really feminine, so fun. I feel like you can also make it like a little project. You can be like, right, I'm going to find some like really cute, sexier pieces. Like, not going to do the photo exchange. He's not going to go. I don't know. Can you like speak to a friend who he's out there with and try and get dates that like, you know when he'll be at home or like, you know when he's got a weekend off? And literally just surprise him. I think that there's like romance and intimacy in that.

Like that is so romantic Also like looking at this is like a fun little project. It's very blue peter and I really feel like it will just get the juices flowing nicely and then he'll just be so shocked and surprised. Yeah. So fun. I think also like always knowing when you're next seeing one another is important. So even if you don't have anything booked like but you just don't know when it is like

get that flight booked and like you'll always then be looking forward to it. You should probably make a rule. I know this is kind of the opposite advice to what you asked for. But like, so say every month one of you is travelling. Yeah, I agree. So like, then you're only paying for flights. Every other month. Yeah, which is really, and if you choose cheaper days.

Yeah. And hopefully if you book further in advance. Also, I don't know who it was, but the same other day, I believe it was someone on the photo shoot saying, if you get the Euro start of France, that's more long haul. So maybe that's slightly irrelevant. Yeah, that was if you're wanting to fly long haul, it's cheaper to fly from Paris. So I was just thinking Paris, actually.

Or is there any way you can like... You have to pay for your Euro stars that's quite expensive. Is there any way you can meet in the middle that's like, if it's just like... You can't pay for hotel. True. It's probably expensive. It becomes expensive. It becomes a full trip.

Yeah, yeah, I get that. I think that if you're both doing a bit more travelling and like just, just, just it's a non-negotiable. Yeah. You won't feel that flag. Like three months is a really, really, really long time. She's had every few months, which sounds to me like a long time. A few is three. I agree.

So like I feel like I'm very proud that you guys have managed to make it work with us. far because that's really tough. Yeah, really tough. I do think maybe seeing each other like that's going between that a month and a half would make you change your mind on it all a bit more. Also, maybe we like watch a program together at the same time on FaceTime so you have like FaceTime dates. Yeah, FaceTime dates is a good idea. I think it brings me back down to lockdown. Yeah, fun though. You could just like fully... Have a glass of wine together over FaceTime. Yeah, have a glass of wine together, cook a gorgeous dinner. Yeah, just chat. I think don't put too much pressure on keeping the spark alive.

Or like trying to be really sexy. Relationships do change and that's okay, especially when you're doing long distance. Like you're going to go into a different phase of it. Yeah. And like I think that like that's fine. I agree. Putting a lot of pressure on things to like feel like it's the beginning and it's all sexy all the time. It's like just unrealistic.

Yeah. And I think with time things do change. But that doesn't always have to be a bad thing. And I think as long as you're both making an effort in that field, which it sounds like you are. I wouldn't stress over it. Yeah, I agree. It's going to turn into a deeper love. I think so.

It sounds like it obviously already has. I do get why you're like worried, like you're conscious of the spark dying out and blah, blah, blah, blah, because it's a long time to go without seeing each other. But make sure there's consistent phase timing and we're seeing each other a little bit more. I think then you're not even going to be worried about it at all. I agree. I mean, you didn't really do long distance with gap at all.

It was sort of went from zero to 100 straight away. It really did. Like, we did like the month apart in August and then we did some time. time apart, like, from our first trip to, like, summer. But I always knew when I was next seeing him. So even where it was like six weeks or four weeks, it wasn't really ever longer than that, because it all went so quickly. Like, I always knew we were always working towards something. Yeah. And that helped. Just makes it so bearable. You just thought, it's like, it's really strange. They actually say that when you have a child. But when you drop your child off at, like,

nursery, you have to say, like, you have to create a plan for them to look forward to. When I pick you up from school, we're going to get home and we're going to cook potato wedges. Yeah. And we're going to watch the tweenies together. And they know that plan's happening. Yeah. Whereas if you just know that they're going to pick you up, there's no like set plan. Yeah. That's when you get a bit anxious. Yeah. So I think always having a set plan of like what you're going to do when you see each other, you can always just look forward to that. And I think it's like a really good comforting thing. I agree for you. Okay, well, love you so much. And I'm sure you're going to be just fine. I'm sure. I feel it. Yeah.

Okay, so if you have any more dilemmas, which I hope you do, the juicier, the badder, doesn't matter what they are, involving your mother-in-law. Yeah, tell us all. It can be anything. Friendships, the whole lot. Email us on Wednesdays at jampop productions.com. Or you can just DMOPRour on Wednesdays. Also, we really appreciate a picture. Yeah, we love, I love a photo with the dilemma and then I can, like, really visualize it.

A visual aid is really important. And also it changes our advice sometimes. Okay, so guys, if you've got a dilemma for us, please reach out through the Instagram Wednesday's podcast or email us at Wednesdays at jampot productions.com.com. Well, thank you guys so much for listening. Thank you. That was so fun. Thank you guys. Love you, love you.