Something Killed 211,200 Animals and Science Still Can’t Explain It

October 19, 20260 comments♥ 0
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00:28 More camp time. More go time. The new 2027 Subaru Cross Trek Hybrid. Consumer Reports top rated subcompact SUV. Stop by your local Subaru dealership or visit Subaru.ca to learn more. Consumer Reports is not indoors products or services. In Kazakhstan, one of the coolest, most obscure, most beautiful animals that has ever walked the earth. This is an animal that was brought to the edge of extinction and then started to bounce back.
00:56 So much so that there were several hundred thousand of them. And all of a sudden we thought, wow, things are looking up for the beautiful Saga Antelope. 2015 hits. The grasslands of Kazakhstan are swarmed by population of animals that we thought we were going to lose forever. All of a sudden, a few randomly die off, then a few hundred, then a few thousand. Suddenly, entire herds collapsed completely. Animals that appear perfectly healthy instantly become severely ill and die within hours. What is going on?
01:27 The mortality rate among the affected animals? 100%. That's crazy. In just three weeks, 200,000 SIGA antelope. Two-thirds of the entire global population drop dead. In three weeks, this is fairly recent. What scientists began to figure out is that this die-off was caused by... I had a magic mine, and it literally is working because I haven't had one in so long.
01:56 Yeah, they do. Oh, yeah. What, wah, wah. Don't make any sexual noises in the beginning of the pod while the music's playing. Shut up, forehead, vein. Welcome to the Wild Times. We are in the studio. We're getting off to a weird start here.
02:12 Yeah, weird, wild stuff. Broologists, producer, brofessor, in the flesh, podcast. What's your name? Forrest? Galante? We've also got Peter and Patrick here. I feel like, do we still need to do these introses? I don't know.
02:27 Because I don't listen to a lot of other people. podcast. Do people usually introduce themselves in a podcast? No. Actually, I don't know. No, they don't. Never once. I listen to a lot of podcasts and I've never heard anyone introduce. So maybe we stopped doing that? Sure. Okay. Interesting. I love when we discuss logistics at the beginning of a podcast. I've never seen you where a baseball happened before. I was just going to comment on it as well. Is it bad or good? No, you look good. Never seen it. It's very different. Yeah. It looks like you're ready to go golfing.
02:52 I was trying to come up with you look like a guy, how he did to Peter last month. That one was really funny. I was trying to come up with it. We'll come back to that. Okay. Well, I found this. It's from our sponsor raised by coyotes who makes a lot of my favorite stuff. We're all wearing it. And I found it because it was just a coyote on a hat. And I was like, I love this.
03:09 Forrest, you look like a guy who teed off at 5.30 a.m. got hammered by 6.30 p.m. and crashed the golf cart into a pond. There you go. You got one? You look like a guy who, like, wanted, is trying to go through an edgy phase. And so he just grew a beard. Kyle, you got one?
03:30 Yeah, you look like a guy who, like, hangs out of the country club for way too long. Yeah. He's just got a red nose. All sounds like really complimentary, by the way. No, no, the guy who hangs at the country club bar's nose is just completely filled with the wallflout. What do they call them? The red dots that you get when you're... Oh, rosacea.
03:48 From you booze and sun too much. All of this sounds wonderful. You look like a guy whose head is bigger than a gorilla's. You look like a guy who's trying out a Halloween conundice. costume. That doesn't fit well. Dude, I'm so pissed. I sit very well.
04:05 It's like two days ago I was at the old CVS and saw this cartoon, the size of this table bag of candy corn. And I literally was like, oh, I'm going to grab that. I was like distracted by something, then forgot. Because I have whatever disease that is. It's called having kids. Now we don't have any delicious candy corn pre-Hawloin. I'm actually really disappointed.
04:28 Like you brought us candy corn. every Halloween for the last seven calendar years. Yes, I have. Yeah, and we've got none from you this year. Really troubling, dude, when things that you really enjoy in life, just go by the wayside because your brain's dumb. I know. I fucked up.
04:43 Kyle, go to my Instagram real quick. I'm curious. I just want to do the annual read of my candy corn post. Oh, have you done a recent one? No, it's just the same one. Oh, okay. I think this is a great idea. We've done it.
04:55 We've done it the past two years. It's good. I mean, look, it's what Halloween's next week, I think. Yeah, this is important. Let's see what you got to say. Here you go. You're very aware of Halloween. No, I'd like you to read it.
05:06 You'd like me to read it? It's a beautiful picture, by the way, of candy corn. Oh, shit, y'all. Candy corn season is back. A few tips for safe popping. Yep. One, only consume while close to a fresh water source. These colorful conular treats can cause wax buildup on the olva.
05:28 Uvula. Uvula, sorry. On the uvula, which is a choking hazard, pro tip, do not substitute salt water. Yeah. If you're in the ocean, don't do that.
05:39 Smart. This is good. Two, no matter how much they beg, do not substitute these for your normal cat treats. Cats cannot digest human earwax, which depending on the brand is either second or third ingredient.
05:53 Instead, try Whiskers brand cat candy corn. No, pause. Read it again. Okay. Try. Make it bigger. My eyes are forgiving. Start with instead.
06:04 Okay. Read carefully. Okay. Instead, try Wiskas brandy candy corn catfoolers. Whisca's brand candy. Candy corn cat foolers. Yeah. Cat foolers.
06:17 Three, avoid the temptation to create a sauce by melting these into a chicken stock. I've ruined two very expensive microwaves this way. Don't do it. Don't do it. Four, remove secret snack quarts from the tiny fifth pocket of your jeans before washing. Believe me, when I say the orange dyed doesn't acquit itself from cashmere easily. It does not. It does not.
06:42 Five, do keep a small bag of these in your earthquake kit. So Cal Residence. That's it. You know what I like about this? This is such a good post. It's definitely not written by AI because it's before AI was a thing. And also... It's from 2015.
06:56 I want to know. 2021. It was in September, too. So I was celebrating early. Yeah. So on 1 to 10, how many cocktails had you had at this point? That was during the middle of a work day. I remember doing it. It's some of your best writing.
07:12 Thank you. Thank you. It was COVID time. Peak COVID. Yeah. Sitting in the office bored out of my fucking mind. It's such a good thing. Way in in the comments if you like candy corn.
07:23 All jokes aside, Patrick does love it. Yeah. You eat a lot of it. It's very controversial. It's delicious. Yeah. I gain a couple pounds every Halloween season. Did you take that picture of that?
07:36 No, I think I found that. It's an internet stock. I was like, that's a beautiful picture. Hey, listen. Oh, sorry, go ahead. Kyle. No, no, go. I was going to say, what do you think the percentage of people in the world
07:46 actually like candy corn is? Under five. Yeah. Then how do they stay in business? That seems like a good call she bet, by the way. That is a good candy corn still be available in 2020. Yeah. I mean, it's front and center at grocery stores.
08:00 Yeah. I think it's funny that Forrest has trouble pronouncing words. Well, he couldn't see because as I've said before, you both need glasses. No, he said Colchie again instead of Kelchie. It's okay. He said Colchee. Out of space. That's okay.
08:14 By the way, a bunch of voicemails came in since Kyle launched the new thing. We were just listening to some. We're going through a bunch of them on. I teared up on the bonus pods. We have somebody who's been listening since. Day 1 and seven calendar years who started listening as a sophomore in high school. It's now a senior in college. That's wild.
08:32 That's wild. But, you know, if you like the show, we do four bonus podcasts every month. No guardrails. Forrest can tell behind the scene stories, stuff that he maybe can't say in a public forum. Yeah. It's just like a group hang. A lot of bad words. Leave us some voicemails.
08:47 Listen, you got a mystery. There's something really interesting that I wanted to dig into. I just read about this. I didn't know it existed. Okay. So let me paint you a picture before we get going. Okay. In Kazakhstan,
08:59 one of the coolest, most obscure, most beautiful animals that has ever walked the earth, something that looks truly out of Star Wars. Out of space. It looks from out of space. This is an animal
09:11 that was brought to the edge of extinction and then started to bounce back. So much so that there were several hundred thousand of them. And all of a sudden, we thought, wow, things are looking up for the beautiful Saga Antelope.
09:24 Can I see this Saga Antelope? Elope real quick, Kyle? Large horns, if I recall correctly. No, it's like this weird. Oh, yeah, they do have big horns. They're such amazing otherworldly. If you're driving, when you get to where you're going, Google Siga Antelope or come watch this. Yeah.
09:39 If you've never seen one, it is truly one of the strangest looking creatures on Earth. Does it have two, what I would refer to as dwarf elephant trunks as nostrils? Pretty much. Yeah. That's wild. Used for heating the air in the cold so that they don't freeze their brains, I believe. And so do these live mostly in that part of Asia? Yep.
10:01 Kazakhstan. I don't know if they actually bleed into other countries or not. You can look at their range map, but it's a very small population. As mentioned, they were on the true edge of extinction. Okay. But what's so fascinating? Well, look at that. Yeah, their range is not very big.
10:14 No, it's really not. And today's current range is even smaller. Okay. Anyway, so here we are. We're fighting for these animals to survive. All of a sudden, you know, circa 2014, the podcast. population has bounced back. There's hundreds of thousands of Saiga Antelope. They're gathering on
10:29 the steppe for their annual calving season. What happens every year. They get into these mass groups, which is why they were so easy to eliminate, right? Because they would all come together. And they'll carve and they'll safely do it. Now, 2015 hits. The grasslands of Kazakhstan
10:45 are swarmed by population of animals that we thought we were going to lose forever. All of a sudden, a few randomly die off. Then a few hundred. Then a few thousand. Suddenly, entire herds collapsed completely. We have absolutely no idea why. Mothers die beside newborn cows. Herds are falling over. Animals that appear perfectly healthy, instantly become severely ill and die within hours. What is going on? The mortality rate among
11:14 the affected animals? 100%. Okay. So none of them get sick and are nurse back to health. Everyone who gets sick is dying. Is dying. Okay. In just three weeks. weeks let this sink in for a second. 200,000 Saiga Antelope. That's two-thirds of the entire global population. In three weeks? And this is fairly
11:37 recent. This was from 2015. I only just read about it. I thought it was I've never heard this story. How was that not like a huge news story? It should have been. And no one at this, nobody knows what's going on at first. Nobody knows what's going on. I got to guess. Yeah. Aliens? No, no. Always. I did think that
11:53 though. It crossed your mind. Prions, dude, like a mad cow disease that there's no cure. You know, like, you can't, you can't cure prions. It, like, just is a folding protein in your brain that makes you go crazy and die. I've never even heard of a prion. So Saiga and a mad cow disease. Oh, okay. But prions are usually caused when an animal eats its own species.
12:15 Is that true? Yeah. Oh, I thought it could just happen randomly. Yeah, like, we created mad cow disease because we were feeding chopped up cow to livestock. That's right. That's right. Yeah. In the UK, I believe.
12:25 And I'm imagining these are all wild SIGA which just eat grass. So let me take it a step further. Well, do you want to take a guess before I do? You're right. They do all eat grass. They're herbivores. They come together in these mass herds, as I mentioned. Esticides?
12:40 It's a good guess. It would be crazy. Oh, wait. You said they all come together for calving season? I'm going to change my guess. Okay. A contaminated freshwater source. Also a good guess.
12:49 Because it would have to be something in the environment that changed. So let me tell you more. Okay. Okay. necropsies begin to take place, right? We're losing what could be one of the most distinct populations of incredible creatures on the planet
13:01 at a rate unfathomable. So scientists start dissecting bodies performing necropsies. What do we find? Nothing except internal bleeding. Nothing's changed. Nothing's being attacked. It seems as though
13:15 nothing in the animal's morphology, nothing in their biome, has changed at all. This is the biggest mystery and since humans evolved. Probably. This is insane. That's crazy.
13:27 So they're bleeding internally, but they can't find any obvious virus or anything like that. Nothing has changed. So their gut biome, their chemical makeup, nothing has changed in the animal. I was going to say maybe they started eating like there was some physical thing
13:47 like microscopic that they were eating that started cutting their stomachs open or something. But that wouldn't explain. their stomach biomes still being okay. That's the problem. That's what's changing. Okay. So there's no changes. So let me explain to you because there's no way to figure out what happened to you. As these autopsies took place, what scientists began to figure out, and I'm not sure how they did, is that this die-off was caused by something they had with them all along.
14:14 Oh, shit. These animals carried a otherwise seemingly harmless bacterium inside of their own bodies. Okay. An environmental trigger, whether that was heat, whether that was soil pH, whether that was sun exposure. That we don't know. They don't know that. Changed the way that this bacterium acted within the animal and caused this mass mortality event. Dude.
14:38 Think about this for a second. I don't want to. I'm scared if it happened to us. And that's what I'm about to say. Holy shit. Imagine you're just a cyga antelope. Imagine you're just a human that has been walking around unaffected by anything your whole life. Because some bacterium that you have in your stomach, and keep in mind, we have millions of these that you don't even know could ever be harmless.
14:59 Some kind of environmental change. Call it a pollen in the air. Call it a wind event. Call it a soil pH shift. Or like a heat wave or something. A heat wave. A humidity. Anything triggers this.
15:11 An alenio. Like the one we're having this here. Triggers this. And it literally flips a switch in two thirds of a species population. Two hundred thousand in three weeks. and drops dead. 200,000. One third of the entire species population drop dead.
15:26 You know, it's... Two thirds drop dead. Two thirds. Sorry. Two thirds left. Yeah, that's right. It's crazy because just how fragile us creatures on the planet Earth are because, dude, if you think about it, like, we're filled with bad bacteria.
15:39 Like, it's just our bodies keep it in check with our immune system or whatever it does. Like, you know, but in this case, it's like the same thing except some environmental factor that they still don't know. Well, what if I told you this? This same bacterium, I'll see if I can pronounce it here. It's called... Tell me it's not in us. Tell me it's not in us.
15:57 It's called Pasterella, Molto-Kida, I think. I'm sure I'm pronouncing it wrong. It spreads to humans through animal bites and scratches, and our own cats and dogs are all carrying it. The trigger, what happened to the Saiga, which we still don't know why or how, is that all of a sudden this otherwise seemingly harmless bacteria that's in such small doses began to proliferate like crazy.
16:21 Yeah, yeah. It just multiplied by, I don't know what magnitude, thousand X, and that's what was causing this internal bleeding and having these animals drop dead. This could happen to literally any species. Kyle, look up cat scratch fever. I want to see if this is the same bacteria.
16:36 Yeah, by Ted Nugent. But it's also, it's also, my father-in-law has this. Like, if he gets scratched by a cat, he can die. What? It's crazy. What's it called? It's a different bacteria.
16:49 I always thought that that was... I let my cat, like the grease on. my forehead every single day. Is that a bad? That's why your forehead looks so greasy and you have no eyebrows, but yeah. Yeah, it licked him right off. But what's so crazy is to think that this killer didn't sweep across Kazakhstan or the world infect the herd.
17:07 This isn't, you know, something out of the last of us, you know, where all of a sudden we're ingesting something or something's changing. This is literally something benign that's in our bodies, in animals' bodies, in these Saiga's bodies, an environmental trigger. just turn things on. And it's interesting to think about this in the scope of the planet, in the scope of all other species,
17:28 what other environmental triggers can happen that can change our microbiome so much so that in an instant it can kill everything or everybody that don't have these certain adaptations. All right. Think about this. It's crazy. It is crazy,
17:45 but think of this is even crazier. What if there's some kind of trigger lying in wait that it doesn't kill us but it fucking is an environmental trigger that like turns on some superpower in us like teleportation or psychic ability that'd be a real treat but wait why can't that why can't that happen
18:04 it can right well I don't think so because of our physiology but what about by our physiology but maybe something in the brain but what if there's like something like you know they have like there's trash code in DNA that they just like they're like it doesn't do anything why would that be there Well, like, you know.
18:21 We don't understand it yet. That's what I'm saying. Maybe there's some environmental trigger coming. I think one way you could play that game. That's right. One way you could play that game is they say we use what, 10% of our brains or something like that? That's what they say, but I hear it's bullshit. Oh, really?
18:36 I was going to say, imagine if that environmental trigger all of a sudden we used 80% of our brains. Yes, dude. That's what I'm saying. Woke up something. Would that be torture? Probably. It might be. I mean, the smarter you are, the more miserable you are all the time.
18:49 That's true. There's no question about that. There's never been an exception to that. No, there really hasn't. Yeah. Intelligent people are more depressed and anxious. Oh, well, apparently that's a complete myth. Scientists have proven that we use the entire brain over the course of a day.
19:02 Well, you use 10%. The rest of us use 100. I use close to four, I would guess. In fairness, if your brain is the size of your head, it's bigger than everybody else. That's why I'm smarter. Where did that bullshit come from then? Like, where did the misperception come from? The whole time I was a kid, that was always what was taught.
19:18 I know. only use 10% of our brain. Same, dude. Most users agree that the myth likely started from a misunderstanding of early neurological research or misquoted statements about how many neurons fire at once. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. It was lately popularized by self-help books and movies like Limitless. Yeah, that movie sucked.
19:37 You thought that movie sucked? Yeah. You love Bradley Cooper. I mean, I only saw it once when it came out. I thought it was great. I do like Bradley Cooper. It makes sense here. It says that the brain only makes up about 2% of the body's weight, but it uses 20% of the
19:47 body's energy. So just like from a biology standpoint, it wouldn't make sense to only technically use 10% of your brain. Yeah, sure. I mean, I could see why the myth, the myth would come about. And then the game of telephone where like nobody had the fucking internet. Like, you know. Gear is incredibly important to me. And I never go anywhere without an EDC, you know, an everyday carry knife.
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24:30 com slash wild for 50% off. After you sign up, they'll ask you where you heard about them. Please, please support our show and let them know we sent you. I thought this Saiga thing to get us back on track here for a second. Good call. Was one of the craziest things. I'd ever read. And it really made me think how I think we oftentimes forget how fragile,
24:49 not just our own species, but the planet is. And that little things like environmental triggers. And I'm not talking about, I'm not trying to get political and talk about global warming or anything like that. But little things that we don't realize that can make huge shifts in species and population dynamics can happen like that. And they do. And they do. Like we, you know, written history accounts for a very small percentage of the time. that human noids have been on earth. Yeah. I mean, there have been numerous catastrophic, you know, volcano explosions that have wiped out huge
25:23 percentages of the population. Global diops. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We are just like, you know, we're all on borrowed time here as a civil.
25:32 That's why I got to live life. You got, I was just going to say you got to live life every day so that you don't regret it. Because who knows? Yeah. Who knows? Exactly. Is there anything worse than looking back at a dull life? I'm like, yeah, that sucked.
25:43 I wish I hadn't done that. Fuck. Yeah. Can I get a do-over? I mean, okay, so what do you think if they said like, hey, fuck, this sucks. A doomsday event is coming. Like, this asteroid is going to hit. It's way too big.
25:56 There's nothing we can do. It's probably going to kill off 98% of percent of you. Like, don't bother trying to figure out bunkers. It's, you got a week. What do you think most? Would society just turn into violent chaos? I think so. I think the construct.
26:12 of the lack of long-term consequences to create absolute chaos because there's so many things that I think so many people say like I've always wanted to do this but it's not worth the long-term consequences I've always wanted to rob a bank I've always wanted to
26:27 you know just I don't even know I don't want to say violent things but you get what I'm saying like I've always wanted to create a riot you know I've always wanted to drive a car off a bridge but it's not worth the long-term consequences but if you're only going to live for a week and you know that like you're not going to get arrested or tried or anything
26:42 in that week, I think it would create absolute civilization chaos. So do you think that if something like this were to happen, factually, they would just keep it from us, right? They wouldn't tell us. Yeah, it's not worth it. Like, they just wouldn't do it. I mean, like, I would much rather than both not. If the government are the powers that being knew this was coming, there's no way to tell you.
27:03 The main focus of the news cycle would be whatever efforts, because efforts would be made. Yeah. Every country that has a space program would be. trying something to deflect it or yeah you know and then they would constantly be showing you a global map of where they think it's going to hit right you know so i think that would be the main focus is like what's my out you don't think they would just keep it from us entirely like that something's coming so man i don't think they could yeah i do think it would be hard to to retain the same because all it takes is one government in europe that that reports on it and then everyone would know
27:38 instantly one guy with a powerful telescope the italian government yeah or that there's a sun-sized rock. That's why I say it depends what it is. It's funny. I watched that Ryan Gossling movie where he goes to space on an Earth rescue mission. Do you know what I'm talking about?
27:53 It's a big hit. The new one. The new one. Yeah, it came out recently. I haven't seen it by her. I watched it on a plane. Project Tail Mary. What a snooze?
28:02 I heard it was really good. It's not. It's not good. I watched it on a plane and about 40 minutes in. I just took my headphones out and listened to to music and still kind of watched. It was that snoozy.
28:12 I thought so. It was a space. People loved it. I know. People went crazy for it. I knew someone who flew from Florida to New York to see it as a premiere because they're so excited about it. That's a weird move. It's very, I agree.
28:26 But it is like a boring version of Castaway with a rock alien. It's like a rock alien set of a volleyball. Yeah. I don't know. I'm so disappointed by it. But the reason I bring that up is it's the same premise, right? It's that I don't, have you seen it or not? I haven't seen it.
28:42 But don't spoil it for me. No, I'm not going to spoil it for you. But basically, there's this impending death coming to Earth. And if somebody doesn't do something, we're going to lose 90% of the population. So the same plot as the Ben Affleck movie with the Animal Crackers. With the animal crackers. Yeah, what's that one called? Ben Affleck and Livetown.
29:00 Yeah, dude, where they're on the oils, buy. Yeah, exactly. The oil rig one. Animal crackers. Do you want to Armageddon? Armageddon. Oh, Ben Affleck's in Armageddon? Yeah, bro.
29:11 I love that. That was like peak butt chin affleck, dude. Look at the end. That was so hot in the 90s to have a butt chin. Yeah. That went away quick. That was the move. Yeah.
29:21 Now, I would have had one of those installed. Yeah. Is there been a recent like resurgence of people, people haven't going to the movies lately. But there's been like kind of a thing where people say like all the movies now are awesome like Project Hail Mary and the Odyssey and like all in like some of those horror movies that have come out. But like have you guys seen any of those and are they actually any good? Because I feel like they're not.
29:42 Well, Project Hail Mary has already been rated and reviewed in this room. So is your hypothesis, Kyle, that there was a dip in people going to the theater and now people are going back to the theater. And so they're just excited to be in a movie theater. So they are liking movies more. Yeah. I buy that. I will tell you something. I did not go to a movie for probably 15 years.
30:05 And then I've just recently started taking my kids to the theater because it's just fucking great. It's great experience. It's really fun. they love it. It's a nice way to kill two hours in silence. They know they can't talk. And I've loved every second of it. Yeah.
30:20 Also, dude, like these chairs suck. These are really uncomfortable, which is why we can't figure out how to sit. They were $4 from IKEA. But, dude, the movie theater chairs are insane now. Yeah, they really had. Full recline, dude, you can swing a tray out over your big fat belly and stick your fucking drink and popcorn on.
30:38 They definitely made some moves after, like, COVID. happened and they were getting really fucked, where they like tried to, I feel like, enhance the theater experience? Sure. And now it's like paying off because it's definitely not. Theaters are way down. I think they're closing down left and right. But I am with the thought that going to the theater is great.
30:58 Are you a fucking expert on theaters now too? Go and look at the fucking rate movie theaters are being abandoned, dude. It's sad. All right. Everybody's just walking around thinking they know everything. I'm not trying to fucking smash your dreams here. No, it's not just you. It's me and everybody else.
31:11 the movie industry is down in ticket sales and cultural reach. Well, yeah, didn't you make a bunch of money on AMC back in 2020? I told you that story, right? I was so proud of that. Yeah, I was just smart move. It was. Anyways, I'm not even going to get into it. No, I think I'm never going to.
31:25 Anyway, back to the point here. I don't know if that's the case or not. I heard The Odyssey was great in theaters. I haven't seen it. I went to go see Avatar 3 in theaters before the James Cameron thing, and it was great. Seeing a movie in theaters was a great experience. I encourage everybody. I think I'm going to go see, uh,
31:41 It's the Evil Dead? Is that the one that's out right now? Resident Evil? Resident Evil. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I want to see it. The trailer looks badass. They made a Resident Evil movie? Yeah, it's out.
31:51 Huh. It's out, dude. You're going to take your kids? Oh, yeah, that'll go well. No, I'm going to take my wife. But yeah, I want to see the new Resident Evil. I think I'm going to go see that. A little daytime action on like a Friday, dude.
32:02 I am matinee, dude. 2 p.m. That's a true. Frosty cold beer. 24 ounce. What are you that dude on Instagram? Frosty cold beer, dare. to kill bro, dude.
32:12 What's that guy's name who does all that? The bro, the bro stuff, we watched it. I don't know. All right. One of the subscribers I was going through some of the questions they sent, and I thought this was an interesting topic. Okay. And I don't know the answer for either of you guys.
32:26 Or Kyle, you too. Has there ever been a time that the weather actually scared you or you thought you might die because of it? Oh, God, yes. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Okay. I've got a couple.
32:39 I got one. I got one. All right. Yeah. start you brought it up it's an interesting question because there's been a lot of fucking you know with the el nino stuff and everyone's predicting like catastrophic weather across the board state of emergency in a lot of weather events let's each think of one this is interesting i know mine i've got a couple i'm going to tell one that's hilarious but yeah go ahead okay uh i i will say i don't
33:00 i didn't think i was actually going to die there was a time oh i did there was a time in greenland where we were on a really long hike and it was like a gnarly hike like not super technical, but there were times where you were like, you know, on a ledge, like to get back to our camp, it was not like, you just waltz through low visibility. Yeah. And a huge storm came in with like super thick fog. You couldn't see it made it into the show. Um, couldn't see fucking eight inches in front of your face. Luckily is during the summer. So it wasn't like crazy cold, but it was everyone got super, super fucking wet. Yeah. Super windy. Um, and so and we didn't. it wasn't like we packed our tents. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like we were just going, boom, five miles here, going to do what we do, hike back.
33:48 So no shelter. No, yeah. So no shelter, zero visibility. And so we basically had to spend a night, which it stays daylight out, which helps. Yeah. It's probably, you know,
33:58 brutal. You know, maybe high 40s, mid 40s, but had to spend a night just with zero visibility, soaking wet and shivering, but not awful. Not to the point of like,
34:09 I've had a lot of those nights. I think I'm hypothermic. Yeah, just miserable. But miserable and you don't know when you're going to get out of it. Yeah. And you're cold and shivering and you're like, this isn't going to stop that soon. No, you just have to wear it all night. I know that feeling very well.
34:24 What do you do? And like five miles from camp. So it's just like a slog. Definitely like one of those times where the thoughts come into your head of like, I could have been an accountant. Yeah. I could have done anything else and I wouldn't be feeling this right now. Uh-huh.
34:38 What do you? If I was alone, I would have been scared. I was going to die. Yeah. If I was alone, I absolutely would have had the absolute fear of death in me, but I think being with a group of like 10 people helps a lot. Sorry, Peter. What were you going to say?
34:49 No, it's actually the point you just made relates to what I was going to ask. Like, so, okay, let's say you are, maybe you're by yourself or whatever, just one other person and you might go hypothermic and you don't have any shelter and you just have to weather this overnight or whatever. Like, how do you best, what's your best chance of surviving that? You take off your clothes and just, because you're wet. Your clothes are wet? You just have to adapt.
35:12 Like, that's the thing. And stay awake. Everybody always asks, like, well, how do you do this? There is no playbook for survival stuff. Okay. I'm asking a specific question, though. Like, let's say you're wet and it's 40 degrees. Yeah.
35:24 You have a sleeping bag. You have to sleep on the ground. Yeah. Like, would it be most beneficial to, like, because you're all wet, like, get naked and get in the dry sleeping bag or to leave your wet clothes on? Oh, definitely take your wet clothes off. Because if your sleeping bag's wet, you're in worse scenario. Okay.
35:40 But I, you know, again, is it, is a sleeping bag already wet? Like, what's the chariot? So in this scenario, there was no option. Nobody had a dry sleeping bag. Nobody had anything dry. Right. Okay. So, and so, and we had safety, a safety person with us, a guy named Bob Parr, who's super cool.
35:57 Used to be like British military special forces guy. Sweet. And no. So nobody took their clothes off. There was no option to get dry. Yeah. Yeah. You know, your jacket provides you some help with the wind.
36:10 and stuff like that. And then his advice to everyone was don't let anyone fall asleep. You know, if you fall asleep, then you really have a chance of going hypothermic. Because your body temperature lowers? I don't know why. I don't actually know why. I just know that we all stayed up for the whole night and talked to each other. I would just make a fire if you could.
36:30 I don't know the surrounding. That's why I say everything's situation. Yeah, it's a option to make a fire. I mean, there's no trees in Greenland. Oh, yeah. That makes it harder. Yeah, I could see. I could see why you would think if you were alone, you would think you would die.
36:43 Yeah. Well, also, you can't see shit. So you're talking to the people next to you and you can't see them. That's crazy. You couldn't see that close? It was that level of, like, just that you were in a cloud. Wow. Okay.
36:54 You want to go next? Yeah, I go next. But there's a little tidbit of advice. If you think you're hypothermic and you might be dying, try to stay awake. And keep moving. Talk to yourself. Talk about loud. Yeah.
37:04 So mine, I was maybe 10 or 11. I was at this pool called hops. and pool over where I live back in the Chicago land area. Actually, I think it was in Westmont or Woodridge. But yeah, so I was at this pool and all of a sudden the sky gets really dark. And if you're from the Midwest, you know that if the sky starts turning green,
37:30 like it's becoming dangerous. Like it could be a tornado. Oh, tornado. Yeah. Okay. So like everything started getting really dark. And then, of course like the wind picks up and we're all at this pool like exposed and we're all like all it is packed you know and so uh just all of a sudden this giant gust of wind comes like knocking people over and and and everybody starts getting frantic like everybody's corraling all the kids and making us go into the uh the locker room there so there's like me and probably 20 other kids or whatever and then like some teenage lifeguards who are clearly freaking out and parents who are
38:10 trying to stay calm but dude like it starts pouring rain thundering lightning and it's so intense the doors are fucking blowing like they can't keep them shut you know in the locker room it's very loud you're thinking we're about to get wiped up by a tornado tornado coming we're literally doing fucking like put your knees between your legs and kiss your ass goodbye against the wall all of us dude and like you know it's just fucking pouring rain it's hammering it's thundering it's lightning this goes on i mean this went on for like 30 minutes oh wow it was probably eight and seemed like 30 yeah that's sure if it was 30 it probably seemed like five hours yeah but so you know obviously oh and so like a tornado fucking touched down one mile away from us dude like a huge one and uh you know
38:56 i mean you could see it basically forming in the sky and the door was like fucking and sweat, and then, like, we just here later. Oh, yeah, there's like a huge tornado fucking took out houses, all this shit. Did you have the tornado sirens going on? Oh, yeah, dude, that too. Oh, that doesn't help. That makes it worse. Yeah.
39:14 Way worse. It's like, dude, I know. It was terrible. Yeah, exactly. Don't put an apocalyptic noise of 200 decibels. Yeah. Yeah. So that was that made it out alive, though, clearly.
39:23 Spit your gum out, dude. Is it bad? It's crazy. It's awful. Oh, why don't you guys tell me? We are now. Leave this in. Yeah.
39:30 Has it been bad? for a while? Since you started speaking. It is not helpful. I'm going to put it right under my seat. Don't do that. Put it in my track file over here. Kyle, do you want to do one?
39:39 You want me to do one? I got a few. One of them involved. Sorry for the gun brusners. Well, you'll pick one. I'll pick one. Okay, so, um, all right. He's like, I'll give you my third best.
39:48 No, no, no, no. Okay. All right. This, I don't know. It was, so I was backpacking, uh, in the mountains of Baja. And basically, we plan on just kind of going up the mountain and back down, so I'd only brought so much water with me because I was just going to be a day trip. Turns out we had to stay the night on the mountain.
40:07 But I drank all my water. Of course you did. Of course, because I'm very thirsty. It's very hot. It's a lot hot. You know, it's, I think it was maybe June. So it was like getting pretty hot. 100 degrees all day long.
40:18 Yeah. Terrible. It sucks. Basically, had to spend the night. The next day, and this was maybe day three or four of the trip, so we'd already been hiking around for a handful of days anyway. The bottom of my hiking boots, brand. new hiking boots had already worn so far down that they could be one because it was hot and it was
40:37 so rocky that there was no grip on them anymore yikes and so when i was up on the mountain it i started to slip on every like kind of treacherishishish that wasn't even that bad but just kind of like like a slant yeah yeah yeah and so it's hot dehydrated shoes are slipping and uh basically had to hike you know at that point like it's just terrible you have to like realize like okay no one's coming there's not a helicopter coming to get right I got to like just keep walking and it was just one of those scenarios. Dehydrated it. Dehydrated at 100 degrees.
41:06 Yeah, it was just terrible. Real quick, not to dog leg of your story, but my buddy Kevin, you know Kevin. He has a similar story to that except he was deer hunting on Catalina and he slipped and he fell into the cactuses. And he was completely by himself. He had no water and he was just covered in cactus spines. He had a six mile hike back to camp. And he said he just had to like limp step each step because he couldn't reach all the spines. And he finally got back.
41:31 to camp like three hours later and his brother spent two hours pulling spines out of his ass with a leatherman oh that's brutal not so funny when it's in a cartoon well dude similar cactus store i went to this uh concert festival in joshua tree uh super fun like just out in the middle of fucking nowhere in joshua tree and there's all these like psychedelic rock bands like a lot of the shit that i like okay and so we had like seen like three or four bands we were drinking all day probably smoking weed i don't know and we were just like, let's sit down because two Primus and then the Black Angels were coming on because it was dark now.
42:04 And so we're like, let's sit down for like 10 minutes, whatever. And so we sit down and my friend's wife stands up. He goes to stand up, but he's like kind of sitting on a downslope. So he just like reaches out and grabs, she's like talking to me. And he just like grabs her arm to like give himself some leverage to pull himself up and just pulls her. straight down onto a cactus.
42:28 Oh, no. And she just had to spend the next like five hours with just many, many cactus spines in her anus. God, dude. That's terrible. Yeah. The other one that I was going to say quickly was just when you got struck by lightning in Florida.
42:42 Oh, yeah. In the pond. I didn't even hit my radar. I didn't even hit my radar as one. This one's great. I didn't know you were there for that. Oh, that was right after AnimalCon, the first one. Yep.
42:51 Yeah. Okay. Yep. So you could talk about it while we pull it up. I got hit by lightning. Yeah. Oh, this is great. Here I go. I'm going to do a watch hat. Oh, my butt. My butt.
43:02 All right, here we go. You see it. That was in good shape. You're very skinny there. Yeah, play the whole video, Kyle. I think I'll look jacked. All right, so on a ski review time, when I'm out here in a place like this in a remote swamp where the thunder's cracking off and there's alligator cruising around, there's a couple things that I absolutely cannot live without.
43:22 One of those is a GPS. It doesn't matter where you go in the world. You should always have a GPS. and I used to carry a big, bulky, hand-held one. Yeah, there it is. God was like, shut the fuck up. He's doing an ad. I'm doing an ad.
43:36 This is what I get paid for. I don't think I can support my podcast hobby. Didn't you kind of take that as a sign that you should shut the fuck? I should have, but no, I'm still doing it. Can I see his cringe moment? Did you guys slow it down? Did you do a slow-mo one somewhere? Dude.
43:52 You must have slowed it down so you can see the actual strike. I mean, what did that hit? Like 15 feet away? Right behind. You can see it. It hurt. My butt hurt. Oh, it did?
44:01 Oh, I didn't know you felt anything. Oh, big time. My whole, like, see how I start curling? That was not like me, like, ducking. That was from the electricity moving through the water. Oh, wow. Yeah. And my, I forget if I told the story or not, but basically for two weeks after,
44:16 the only thing I could taste in my mouth was metal. And I didn't have any head dizziness or anything weird, but my, my butt and thighs were sore because I clenched so hard. Yeah. From the electricity. Like, you know. The electricity probably made them seize. Yeah, exactly right.
44:31 Remember how you could use to buy like an ab band that would snap your abs or whatever? It was like that to my butt and thighs. And I was sore for like a week. It clenched so hard. Dude, I spent, I spent a fair amount of time forensically investigating this video to find out if you had set this up. Because I was convinced that like somebody. A.I. Dude.
44:50 No, somebody threw like an M.80 behind you and you wanted to make a viral video. Oh, that's clever. I slowed it down. I was like playing it at 0.25. He's so suspicious. It's such a weird thing. Like I would do that. No,
45:03 I, like, it's a good idea now that you're saying it out loud, but like there's no rationale behind doing what you just said. Once you get caught doing something like that, you're done. Also, by the way, your credibility's killed.
45:15 I just like wouldn't do that. Like throw an M80 and make a light flash so that I can, I show everybody how bad we shoot our ass. Like, I just wouldn't do it. What I determined? And this is, this is peer reviewed, is that your reaction is genuine. Yeah, it hurt like shit, dude.
45:33 Look at the reaction, dude. It's so. It's pretty funny. That's good. Ah, my butt. Dude, you run like you're under attack and meet the time or some shit. Well, it's so goddamn, wow. It was so unbelievably loud.
45:45 Okay. All right. All right. My story, which that's funny because the lightning one I hadn't even thought of. You've almost died so many times. When I was 17 years old, I had a 15. foot piece of shit Boston Whaler. Pull up a 15 foot Boston Whaler. It's a type of boat.
46:00 A little center console boat. Dude, when you get like a sick Boston whaler that someone's like fully restored with like the teeth. Go the first one. Very first one was like mine. Sorry, go ahead. Such cool boat. Oh, they're great boats. They can look so cool. They're foam filled. They call them unsinkable boats. They're a great boat. Mine look like that. Okay.
46:16 Imagine taking that to the California Channel Islands 24 miles across the channel. That's just dumb. Right. Through the open ocean. Open ocean. So it's a, it can be a very rough. For people who have never done it, it can be a horrendous ride. It's one of the worst channels in the world. They have a ferry that
46:32 goes there and people puke. Yeah, and even that's rough. It's the size of like the Sears Tower. That's probably what mine looked like with a slightly newer engine in fairness. It wasn't as bad as the wooden seat one you saw, but still. So I had this boat when I was 17 years old. It was the only boat I could afford, obviously. When I
46:48 got the boat, I picked it up and I borrowed some money from my parents and I paid for it with my little startup business that I had, which was teaching kids about wildlife. And when I picked up the boat at the boat dealer, the one thing, like, literally my parents and the boat dealer said is like, this boat is not made for the open ocean. You cannot take this to the Channel Islands. I was like, of course. I literally drove it. If I'm lying, I'm dying. I drove it from the dealership to the launch ramp and went straight out to the
47:17 channel island. This is why I'm confident you use only 10% of your brain. This is why. Yeah. So I did probably seven or eight trips to the islands in this little boat. I multiple times spent the night on this boat sleeping just out on the deck, shivering cold, like you just explained. You were solo? No, I always had a friend with me pretty much. I even took Jess with me and subjected her to this death trap. Oh my goodness. But wait, it gets worse. Your wife went on this with you? Yeah, yeah, it gets worse. So I had this boat for, I don't know, six or seven years. But I would say two years into ownership, at no point in time had I ever understood how to read or learn the weather. So I would just look out and be like, yeah, it looks like a nice
47:55 day, let's take the boat out. And so I would just take the boat and go to the Channel Islands. And several times I came back, especially in Santa Barbara where I live, you come back from the islands, what we call uphill against the swells. And it gets pretty rough. Made several trips back where it was pretty rough. One day, it's with my buddy Jordan and my buddy Tommy. And we're like, let's go to the California Channel Islands. Let's go spear fishing. So we jumped in the boat, ran across, beautiful morning, no issues, boated across the channel. How many hours? It takes about an hour, hour 20 maybe. Okay. If it's flat. Got it. made it across
48:27 dove all day and I remember at about two o'clock Tommy Tommy goes dude it looks pretty windy out there I was like nah we'll be fine and so we kept diving till probably five o'clock
48:38 that evening right and then we're like all right time to go home so sorry to be clear you're in like a cove protected by the island and he's looking out into the ocean
48:46 and it yeah so pull up hold on not that you dumb dumb um type in it is that's fair type okay just zoom in on the map
48:55 real quick. Zoom way, way in. So go to Santa Cruz Island. See where that little camp is right there on Santa Cruz, the big one? Zoom way in. So that area, there's an area called Yellow Banks. Keep zooming, keep zooming. And you're on the backside of the island. If you were to zoom out, the wind usually comes ripping down that channel, right? Zoom way out real quick, Kyle. So imagine east to west here, the wind comes ripping through that channel, where Kyle's cursor is. So when you're on the backside of that island, it's like a lake. It's a beautiful little mill pond. It can be crystal clear, dead flat. That's why there's a little camp there and everything else. Right. So we're diving there. We shot some fish, whatever, and we pack up and we're like, time to go home.
49:30 So we hop into the, you know, we get in the boat. We get our, get our wetsuits off and our shirts on or whatever. And my buddy Tommy, we go, oh man, it looks pretty windy out there. Because as you look out from the protection of the east end of that island, you can just see this wall of white. And that's from the wind ripping so hard down the channel that it's creating white caps. And I've, again, I've never learned to read weather. I've never done anything like this. I'm just like, Is this just so I know what the sun level is at? Probably June. 5 p.m.
49:59 Okay. So you've got a few hours of sunlight still. Yeah, I mean, a couple. Okay. But, you know, enough that the plan was to get back what was still light and load the boat on the trailer and go home. Okay. And anyway, so we take off.
50:10 And as we take off, if you think of that, so imagine the waves are coming this way, right, from where Kyle's cursor is. Yep. And imagine you're taking off to Santa Barbara, which is straight up. So you're side to the waves, which is the most dangerous way you can ever be in a boat. Just tip you right over. Exactly. So we take off from.
50:25 there and long story short it just gets worse and worse and worse and 15 20 minutes into what should be a one hour ride where maybe two miles off of the island the waves every other wave the boat's going like this and then shooting down the wave and the waves are crashing over the boat and my buddy Tommy's like holding on in the front and uh no i'm going i'm going from usual cocky me to like you know the boat nearly gets tipped over the boat nearly gets tipped over my buddy Jordan is white knuckling it. He's much more sane than myself and Tommy. Tommy's laughing holding on the bow. And I go, hey, I remember Jordan goes, Jordan goes, hey, we should throw some life jackets on. I go, oh yeah. And then I go, hey, Tommy, look in that front locker. They're life jackets.
51:11 And he manages to get open. He's like, no life jackets. I was like, okay, cool. God. We go about another 15 minutes. It gets worse. So now we get out of all the lee of the island. We're in the center of the channel. And we need help. Every wave is crashing over the boat. the boat's just about tipping, we're in trouble. Yeah. So I get on the radio and I call a Mayday and the California Coast Guard picks up. Fortunately, the only thing I did know was Channel 16 was where you call to get a coast guard, hold of Coast Guard, blah, blah, blah.
51:35 And I call in. It's not a Mayday, but I go, hey, California Coast Guard, California Coast Guard, are you there? And they're like, yeah, come in, blah, blah, blah. And I start talking to these guys. And they're like, okay, where are you? I'm like, I'm mid-channel, Santa Barbara Channel. They go, what size boat are you? And I'll distinctly remember because, holy shit.
51:51 And I go, I'm like, sorry, sir. and he goes, you're in a 16 foot boat right now, boy? And I'm like, yeah, he's like, there's a gale warning out right now. Nobody should be out on the ocean. Wow. And I was like, well, that's not good. And he goes, all right, we're about to deploy the helicopter. Do you think the boat is going to tip over?
52:08 And I go, well, I'm not sure, you know. And then he goes, my parents killed me when I told him this part of the story. He goes, where are you? I go, I don't know, somewhere in the middle. He goes, give me your coordinates. I was like, I don't have any coordinates. And he goes, how are we supposed to find you? I was like, I don't know, just look in the middle.
52:24 Flare gun. Yeah. And he goes, do you have life jackets on board? And I go, yeah? He goes, put on your life jackets right away. We had no life jackets on board. So my buddy, my buddy Jordan, it gets crazier. My buddy Jordan starts panicking.
52:41 And Tommy's like laughing because he's a psycho. And so immediately the guy says, okay, turn towards Port Wynemi. So if you see where Santa Barbara is, he goes, turn the boat towards Port Wynimi. So we turn the boat towards Port Wynemi. So now we're going downhill. So now what you have to do, I don't know if you know this, is you go up the... So instead of going side to where the boat was having waves crash over us constantly and submerging the boat and coming up and losing everything, all our gear's gone. We've lost almost all our gear.
53:06 Wow. And we're just like hanging on for dear life. And it's pretty crazy. We turn towards Port Wainimi. Now what happens is you're going with the wave. So you go up this mountain of water. And then as the wave drops out below, you have to speed up. Because if you don't speed down the wave, the wave, the wave.
53:22 They've turns your boat and rolls you. And you kind of... It's a very... I've been in boats where this... With BTG and Alaska, whoever's driving the boat, they're driving the shit out of the boat. You cannot break focus for a second.
53:36 And I've never done this before. It's fucking terrifying. But the skill level is significant. It is. And I didn't have any of the skill because I was 17 or 18 years old. And I'd never done it before. But the guy was on the radio was explaining to me what to do. And I was just...
53:49 Wait, really? Yeah, really. Holy shit. The, the coach... Coast Guard was like, he said to me, he said to me, we don't know how to find you if you don't have coordinates. I said, sir, I don't have a GPS. And he was just, you can tell, he was just flabbergasted. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he's like, turn the boat. Do you know how to go downhill? I was like, no, sir. He says, turn the boat towards Port Winniemi right now. I knew where that was because of the
54:08 compass. So I turned the boat in that direction. And now I was going downhill. And he goes, as the wave picks you up, go slow up the hill and speed up downhill. Do not let the wave catch you. So we had to shoot down each wave and then slow and then shoot down. Meanwhile, there's wind and everything. I swear to God, if I'm lying, I'm dying. To this day, I don't know the answer. As we're doing this, Tommy, my lunatic friend, he's passed away since from being so crazy from a rock climbing accident. He goes, holy shit, look at those fucking sharks. And we look behind us, and I'm not joking. There are two great white sharks following the boat. To this day, I'm not sure if they were white sharks or basking sharks. It might have just been a coincidence, but we saw
54:44 these two huge fins following the boat like they knew we were going to go over. Anyway, Anyway, long story made short, what should have been a one-ish hour run home took us four and a half hours. We did make it back. The Coast Guard found us when we were going by platform Holly, I think it was called, which was one of the close platforms. They're like, we picked you up on radar. We've got you. We've got you. We're watching. And then basically they just said check in every five minutes. So every five minutes I had to call and check in. And they stayed on the radio with me for four and a half hours. And we made it back. By the time we got within two or three miles of short, it started to calm down to the point of not. How far was that platform that they knew where you were at? Holly's only six miles offshore. And it's a 24 mile run. Okay.
55:26 So it took them a long time to be able to locate us, but nobody knew where we were, and I didn't have coordinates. Anyway, it's not like you can fucking see you out there, even if there was like a helicopter. You're just a small boat in all these swells. And I was too dumb to know where I was or had anything.
55:41 Anyway, eventually got back in. Nothing bad happened. But like I said, we lost more than half the year, just got blown over the boat. Yeah. We saw these two sharks for maybe 30 seconds of following us.
55:53 It was crazy. We had no flares, no life jackets, nothing. And we got back in. And I'm actually glad I lied to the Coast Guard, hopefully statute of limitations here, and said I had life jackets because they would have ticketed me very severely had I said no. But I got back in. They never met me at the dock or anything.
56:08 When I radio and said, we're in the harbor mouth, they're like, all right, you know, don't ever let this happen again kind of thing. Yeah. And I was,
56:13 the mistake I made was I got home that night at like, I don't know, midnight 1 a.m. I was 18, 19 years old, so I was living at home. So you went out boozing hard after that? No, I got home. We were exhausted. Yeah.
56:25 And went back to my house and told my mom what had happened. And she immediately took my boat keys away and was like, you're never, you're not allowed to use the boat anymore. And that was what set me on my path to get my 100 ton captain's ship license. Yeah. Because she's like, you now have to get a boat or safety course or whatever, which was kind of a thing. And then I did that and I actually really liked it. And then I went on to get my captain's license. And now I know how to do all those things and I could read charts and I read
56:48 weather. But it's like as if I went out last week during the hurricane, just because. Because I looked down and I was like, yeah, it's a nice day. So after that, though, so that was the last time you like went on a boat into a scenario like that unprepared. You actually took a course. Well, you know what I'm saying, though. Like, no, no, what I'm saying, though, before you went on a boat next time, you had taken a course on how to like be safer. No, of course not. I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, said you did. No, she literally kept the, kept the, kept the keys to my boat until I could show her that I had completed a boater safety course. Gotcha.
57:22 So no, that is true. But I've been in several gnarly seas since then, but not like that. That was like one wrong move. If I hadn't, I think there were a couple things. If I hadn't been in a Boston Whaler, which is a foam-filled boat, meaning it doesn't sink when the waves break over it, I think we easily could have all been gone. No life jackets.
57:43 No life jackets. We were freezing, soaking wet. I mean, it had to be blowing 30 miles an hour. had to be 10-foot seas. It was a crazy, crazy day. So did you consider just turning back and going to that campground? I couldn't. We couldn't turn the boat around.
57:56 It was so sketchy trying to drive. If you had turned, you would have been fucked. I think there was a time at which we could have made that decision and would have been totally fine, slept on the boat left early in the next morning. But by the time I radioed Coast Guard and everything, I was in full white-knuckle panic mode. And literally, the difference between pointing to Santa Barbara and pointing to Port Wainimi is like that. I don't think we could have done a 180.
58:16 I think if I tried to turn the boat around, we would have been dead. Sure. Yeah, that makes sense. It was that gnarly. And I'll never forget it. My two buddies were like, fuck you, dude. Yeah. Yeah.
58:26 I mean, yeah. They got on the boat. Yeah. Look. I'm the Jordan in that situation. You know, like I know I would have been doing what Jordan was doing and probably even more extreme. Yeah. But you also know both of you and Jordan and Tommy and everybody else, that is the
58:46 mental waiver that you sign with being my friend. That comes with our friendship. If you don't want to nearly die, don't be my friend. And certainly don't get on a boat with you. Yeah, that's lunacy. Don't be an idiot. Don't go on a boat with me as a captain at 17. Are you joking?
59:02 Dude, my court is all levels high just from listening. 100%. I'm white knuckling over here on the side of the chair. It was gnarly. Let us know in the comments which of the four stories would make you the most scared. Or which one you'd like to go through? No, you don't want to go through any of those. What was Kyle's again?
59:19 Hiking and bottle out with no water. And then shitting his pants. Are anyone going to trick or treating? Yeah, of course. What's the stew? I am yet to order one. I hated last year's Halloween costume. I went to, I just went with 80s guy, and I got the Ken costume without realizing it.
59:39 And everybody was like, oh, you're Ken. Oh, is that what you're wearing right now? Yeah. No, I don't have one. But you always do a group theme. What do you got? Yeah. Well, we just let my oldest daughter pick.
59:50 And? I'm a character. I'm the fox from Zootopia. That's pretty good. So I don't know what it entails. I stay out of it and I put on the costume as I'm told. That's smart. Peter?
01:00:01 I'm going as Tiger Woods and the rest of my family are hookers. Wow. I hope that's true. Are you going to carry a golf club? No, a bottle of gin. Good night, everybody. Good night. We love you, Tiger.
01:00:13 What are you really wearing? I haven't thought much about it. My son's really into Pokemon. I think we'll do a Pokemon theme. A lot of times I don't dress, just the kids do, because I'm an adult. Unlock unlimited free grocery delivery with PC Express Pass. Shop online and get the same low No Frills prices delivered. Get your first year of PC Express Pass for just $2.50 a month.
01:00:37 Learn more at nofrills.ca. What does a sunny getaway with Air Canada sound like? Sunny Jamaica moves to its own. rhythm. Rio comes alive long after the sun goes down. Philippines slows everything down. And just when you think you've heard it all, there's sunny Lima. However you imagine your sunny escape, Air Canada can take you there. Book hot fairs and vacation packages today. Nice travels. What a crumudgeon.