ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Lil Bitta Pod - 25th June 2024

Starting point is 00:00:00 Fleshborn and Hayley's Little Bit of Pod Great things are brewing at McCafe, the perfect start to every day Welcome to A Little Bit of Pod Now I believe, and he wants to show off as the only male present with hair Wow, out Hayley's word's not mine Jared, you've got a new hair care routine? Nah, so I was having an everything shower the other day.

Starting point is 00:00:28 Trimmed? Of course. Primmed and trimmed? Yep. You know. Plucked, tucked? Nips and nips. Yep, nips and slips and snips.

Starting point is 00:00:35 Clean and squeaky. I can't shave in the shower. I have to shave at the basin. Like when I shave my face and head. Oh, yeah, right. If I didn't have a beard, I'd just shave it all in the shower Because you don't need to stop anywhere apart from the eyebrows You go from top eyebrow

Starting point is 00:00:51 All the way back around Around and up and down and around Just to the top of the arse You can't because you'll take one side down too far So I do the face and And then I jump in the shower and just do the whole head Because you love it Jared you wouldn't do your moustache in the shower

Starting point is 00:01:07 No no no the moustache requires Mirror, lighting Yeah three different point of views So I was having my everything shower And used all the hot water What a prick To be fair Emma wasn't having a shower afterwards I was the last person to shower

Starting point is 00:01:22 How big is your cylinder? It's not a big cylinder, my man. It sounds like you've got a little one. It sounds like you've got a tiny one. Yeah. Jared's packing a little fella. Oh, babes. So Emma was like,

Starting point is 00:01:34 why were you in the shower so long? And I said, I had to wash my hair. And I've got a buzz cut. She kind of was like, why? You would literally be like this. Yeah, exactly.

Starting point is 00:01:43 And I was like, oh no, it just wouldn't get clean. So I had to do it like three times. And she was like, what do you mean it wouldn't get Yeah exactly And I was like oh no it just wouldn't get clean So I had to do it like three times And she was like what do you mean it wouldn't get clean And I was like well I didn't hear the squeak What It's not fucking dishes That's when I realised that I'd been taught

Starting point is 00:01:57 How to tell if my hair was clean Ever since I was a kid Wrong Why are you washing it till it squeaks So the theory is you wash your hair, you wash the shampoo out, and then if you go squeak with your hand, it squeaks on your hair.

Starting point is 00:02:13 That's how it's clean. I remember that having squeaky hair when we were kids, but it was when our nan used to wash our hair with soap. Or sunlight dishwash. Get a bit of that in, you'd have a little bit of a squeak afterwards. Squeaky clean. It feels like you're washing your hair to smithereens.

Starting point is 00:02:28 I wash my hair twice. You're supposed to do that. And does it squeak? It doesn't squeak. Well, it's obviously not clean. Yeah, it's obviously filthy. Have I got filthy hair? Oh, my God.

Starting point is 00:02:38 Yeah, that's when Emma revealed that I'm crazy and you know your hair is clean because it foams up more. I thought shampoo foamed up normally. No, that's why you do the double cleanse. Okay. Cleanse once. Well, the girls know. Cleanse once to sort of get it going a little bit.

Starting point is 00:02:52 Rinse and then you cleanse and that's when you get the real. Yeah, see, when I did have hair, I would shampoo twice. I would shampoo twice. Well, then why does conditioner always run out before shampoo? Because you used to tip it back in the day before we knew that it was causing such terrible build-up on our hair. You'd condition because it felt nice, and you got all slippery and slimy.

Starting point is 00:03:11 Wait, so we're not conditioning now? No, we condition, but just once. Oh, right. Shampoo twice, condition once. Okay. And you're supposed to leave the conditioner in for a while, right? Yeah, let it settle.

Starting point is 00:03:20 Could you shampoo four times, condition twice? I'm sure you could, but I'm not made of money. No, because you're ripping out the natural oils, aren't we girls? Oh, natural oils. I do a scrub first. I do a scalp scrub, then a shampoo, then a double shampoo, then a hair drink, then a condition, then a leave-in. You've got a hair drink.

Starting point is 00:03:37 You've got to feed the hair. You put it in. What's a hair drink? Well, there's all sorts now. Hair care used to be shampoo and conditioner, or if you were smart, a two-for-one. A head and shoulders. A head and shoulders two-in-one.

Starting point is 00:03:50 I could imagine a flatting Vaughan Smith in his early 20s doing a head and shoulders. Absolutely. Controversial. Head and shoulders shampoo. I like the smell. Yeah, it slaps. It slaps, eh?

Starting point is 00:03:59 What's that one that smells like apples? That's really nice. That would be the apples. Yes. That's fructose. I like that. There's a head and shoulders apple. Oh, one. Yes. That's fructose. I like that. There's a head and shoulders apple. Oh, is there?

Starting point is 00:04:07 There's the apple. Yeah, dog. Oh. You guys probably wouldn't be in the champagne. I got the head and shoulders. Oh, no, I wash my beard with head and shoulders.

Starting point is 00:04:15 Oh, do you? I feel like you'd use an Old Spice shampoo, or like a head and shoulders Old Spice. You should actually. You'd suit an Old Spice smell. Okay, well,

Starting point is 00:04:23 okay, so going forward, you're just going to wash... By the way, some people would take that as a slight. Oh, no, I meant it with the utmost... I want you to smell like wood and whiskey. I might actually purchase some Old Spice right now. Don't lie. Add to cart. What does Old Spice go for?

Starting point is 00:04:38 I don't know, in New Zealand. Do you want the roll on... Old Spice do a speed stick. Yeah, they do a speed stick in America. Do you want me to get you one? Oh, yes, please. And one that smells like kind of like... Yes, please. Old Spice do a speed stick Yeah they do a speed stick in America Do you want me to get you one? Oh yes please One that smells like kind of like Yes please

Starting point is 00:04:48 Musky Wait that's your gift Drunk old man You're going overseas soon For a nice time And your gift to your best friend Is an Old Spice speed stick And Vaughn wants some M&M's with his name on them

Starting point is 00:04:59 Yeah As well That's cute What a beautiful gift With a V With a V Okay V and V's Alright Cute Old Spice do a whole range As well. That's cute. That's real cute. What a beautiful gift. With a V. With a V, yeah.

Starting point is 00:05:05 V and Vs. All right. Cute. Old Spice do a whole range. Yeah, it's massive in America. It's not so much here. They do it like a bead wash. Oh, it's huge in America. The ads?

Starting point is 00:05:14 Yeah. Oh, the ads. Done with one shot? Yeah. Look at me. Look at my hand. Now look back at me. It's so good.

Starting point is 00:05:19 It's so good. Arm put its body here in a bundle. An Old Spice bundle. You need the actual Old Spice spray. Yeah. Yeah. The smell like wood and... With a ship on the front, eh?

Starting point is 00:05:29 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:05:40 . . . . .

ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Lil Bitta Pod - 25th June 2024

On Today's Lil Bitta Pod; Producer Jared discovered he'd been doing something wrong...See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information....

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