10 Minutes of Schaub - Brendan Schaub HAS A NEW SHOW ABOUT PIZZA! | 10 Minutes of Schaub #106

Episode Date: October 29, 2024

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Well what are we doing here? What are we doing? Flip my truck Flip my truck Come on, come on, come on, come on, in and out Come on in and out Come on and walk through my truck We walked in my truck

Well walk through my truck Walked in my truck You know you look so nice Yeah you look so nice You know you got me walking out You got me walking It was a special time It's a special time Woo It's a special time.

What take? It's time for my favorite time of the week. When you get to hear Bob try to speak. Release surprises today. You better actually watch 10 Minutes of Shop. Welcome back to 10 Minutes of Shop.

Thanks for tuning in. As always, please join the Patreon, the Discord, and the Reddit. Ever heard of it? We're up to 300 on the Reddit. Yes. Thank you guys for joining. Last week on the Patreon, we did Sal Vulcano's Terrified stand-up special. Never seen him before other than Impractical Jokers, which I also have never seen.

Great show. I just want to give him a chance to see if you want to know whether we liked it or not. Tune into that. You got shows to plug? Yes. This 27th, June 27th. Last episode I said April. I'm a fucking.

Oh, no. Quick, quick, quick. June 27th, I'm going to be at the Hollywood Improv. Come check it out, dude. Boom. Ever heard of it? All right, great. Well, anyways, that's not why they're here, though.

They're here to watch Sam as a shop. So start the timer. Play the chain clip all righty dude i just want to fucking dude this week's episode i am calling my shot like babe ruth dude it's gonna be sad dude oh no it's just sad dude okay i was picking clips and i'm like god damn i'm sad dude there's trouble in the boppa verse yeah dude no that's too bad i mean i always want i always root for boppa. Me too. But there's got to be some sad weeks for there to be really good weeks.

Yes. You know? And there's also really funny stuff too. Okay. But until before the sad stuff, we got this post by Boppa Strange called Joe Rogan Talks About Brendan Chopp's Podcasting Skills.

Oh yeah, I've seen this one. I haven't seen this. Let's see. I never thought of podcasting or conversations like an art form before I did it. But then once I did it and started seeing people that suck at it, like some people just talk over their guests. They don't listen.

They're just waiting for their chance to talk. It's like you're making a shitty product. And it really is like it's an audio visual form of art of the conversation. Like there's an art to having a conversation. And it's so painful when you hang out with people and they're not good at it. And they just they're clunky and they talk over everybody and they don't listen. It's just not fun. What?

Here it comes. Are you finished talking? Go ahead, sir. I just want to make sure. So you don't accidentally gadoosh yourself on airwaves? You kind of talked over me there, but it's fine.

I did? Yeah. What? Okay, are you done talking? No, dude. Oh, yeah. Now. This is the best podcast of all time, time dude you're showing what it would be

like yeah yeah well that yeah see cats that's what this would that's what that that could be like that and that's what uh t5k is like sometimes the one thing joe rogan didn't mention is stuttering i think stuttering adds color to the show. And I didn't stutter ever. No one saw that. All right, let's see. I don't know what this is going to be. What's next? I'll tell you what I think.

And one of the reasons I say this, because I heard you say this, so I put a lot of weight into it, is he's done. Okay, so yes and no. I think he retires. I don't think a Tony Ferguson. I don't think a Conor fight I don't think a Connor fight. You know, you're like learning how to- I don't know if it ever goes well. Who do you want to listen to, dude?

Bopper? That fuck- I don't even know his name. That's true. We don't know who he is. Nobody knows who he is. Not one of our guys. Mm-mm.

Let's see. I always have. It's just controlling the monster. Like, the chip on my shoulders, I can tell you how tall it is. Every day. This morning, you know, I woke up and- I mean, the first time I hit someone, I felt real awkward. it is. Every day, this morning, I woke up. The first time I hit someone, I felt real awkward. I had no idea what I was doing.

I went up to Alpha Mill, my first sparring session ever, and just got beat to crap. I mean, a bunch of killers up there. I think the first time I remember hitting someone and it felt good, it was when it... Oh. It's just... You know, it's like, it's a weird thing because i said to brennan i said it's like um you know it's it's like watching someone die or something and also it's

you know what's important is that we haven't spoken to ch. No, well. Facts! No, it's not. No, it's not. I learned next, bring it back. What's funny about that old classic clip of them talking about D'Elia that I'm just realizing now is that it's a clip where you're talking about something that if you're them, you probably don't want to talk about it at all. You don't, it's not like,

if I were in their shoes, I would think, how quickly can we address this and not and brendan is still interrupting to talk he's still he's like but like he wants to dig the hole deeper to get out of ridiculous he's a very dumb guy and in favorite shoe over fucking views, dude. Come on, man. Stick to the fucking basics, brother.

Yeah. God damn it. I hope that works. Let's see. That's exactly what it's like. We're all having an icing party. You're over there like, do you have any sushi? Yeah.

At seven. Dude, when I don't talk, you don't talk. And then I go to talk, and then you talk. I know. It's the icing. What the fuck is the thing? I wait, and then I go, and he goes. And then I'm like, I wait to give you a chance to talk.

I don't want to go then. You don't to talk. I don't want to go there. Don't use it. I don't want to go there. That's not how I work. Oh, I'm sorry I take my job. He's great at humanizing Didler. Because everyone hates Didler now. He's so hated.

Yeah, in that clip, I have a feeling that everyone watching that feels like Didler. You know? Right? When I don't talk talk you don't talk but then when i talk you talk and i think in that moment i'm like diddler's hilarious i love that clip dude he's so like like calm cool and frustrated what is like is this the part of the bit is this part of the bit that he's gonna talk when I'm trying to say It's so funny though. I mean I don't even

and then you're like That voice you know and it's very good. Let's see serious I'm sorry if you took it serious you wouldn't interrupt if you took it serious you wouldn't interrupt Picking his nose for Nothing This is the clip we're gonna watch like 18 times today dude yeah okay i have seen a little bit of this one i haven't seen anything i've been in san diego daddy oh yeah look at that face dude oh my god bro you know what that looks like what was that that looks like sylvester stallone face

yep because it's probably work done those lips are juicy, dude. What the fuck? It's Stallone face, and you know where Stallone face comes from. Plastic surgery, daddy. Oh, I thought you were going to say spicy Latinas. That too. That too. Damn. Yeah, when they kiss, they suck the blood to your lips, dude.

They're fucking assholes. Nothing is better. It's true. Nothing is better than that. It's true. It's worth crying over. Yep. Just happy.

Oh, man, dude. This whole universe is insane. Yeah. It would be funny if he picked up, because we have the same can of rain now that he does the new sour gummy worm flavor. Check it out. Please, please drink this. If you take anything away from this show, drink sour gummy worm total body fuel rain.

Now, this can... Yeah. Now. Now. Back to that one. If you have this anywhere near you, drink it immediately. He's like, he's crying. And it's just so hard.

Product placement. Could have used the rain today, daddy. Oh yeah, man. Oh shit, fuck. Three hours of, oh shit. What was that doing there, dude? I edited that out of the whole episode, dude. It's like, it's the Marg face.

You give Red Bull the Marg face. And it has the Marg face. You give Red Bull the Marg face. And it has a Marg voice. Why would Red Bull talk? Actually, it'd be funny if you're drinking the Red Bull and there was a noise to it that got blurred. Like the drinking sound is deeper. It's like. Yeah, that's so gross. It's the only thing that, yeah.

It's the only thing that gets me going too. Just happy. That's amazing. That's amazing, dude. Can you realize you're doing something right? You realize you're doing something right. Yeah. What?

Everything else is still. He's a good kid. Dude, I'll say that that's an emphasized raspberry right there. What do you mean? With the plump lips. It's like. Gerardo's nailing, he's nailed in on or zeroing in on these lips. Okay.

That's insane. You saw what I saw. I agree. I'm just saying these are your own attack mode. Dude, don't get your lips done, dude. No, definitely not. Not an earwax. You know how many times I've begged Cooney to get his teeth done?

I won't do it. No, I can't get fake teeth and guess what that's what i'm talking about dude don't do it yeah yeah oh so crazy let's see everything else is so hard full of failure but when i know it's sad to say but this is kind of how everybody's movie ends if you stick around long enough it's just the way it is yeah no for sure he's sure. He's not as fast. He's not as quick. But I would say this. Physically, he doesn't look the same as you. I'm a cat. I've had nine lives career-wise. I'm a cat.

Do you have any, could you make it look like on the next episode or even the next clip that I have very big lips? I don't know if I could do that. Yeah, that's a tough. If I can, it's happened already. Okay, good, good. But if it didn't happen, I can't do it. Okay. Yeah, yeah. All right, that's a tough. If I can, it happened already. Okay, good. But if it didn't happen, I can't do it.

Okay. Yeah. All right. Let's see this. That was crazy. Well done. Oh, yeah. That was a Papa Strange.

Let's see. This next one is posted by N. Y. N. Come poop. Okay. This is the clip. We're going to watch over and over.

There's like four fucking clips of this. Like nincompoop. Oh, nincompoop. Yeah. Dude, that's why. Maybe like New York type deal or something. I don't know. Yeah.

I thought it was New York Nancy come poop. It might have something to do, but nincompoop is what, yeah. It's asterisk crying mental breakdown, done some cool shit, just happy. We're going to watch this over and over. It's like the truck flip, dude. Oh, yeah.

This is this week's truck flip. Let's see. Let's see. Dude, I've had I could die tomorrow. I've had a great fucking life. I've had I'm a cat. I've had nine lives career wise. I played football and it was such a good time.

I was in the UFC. Oh my god. The things I did, it was so cool. Stand up. Are you joking me, dude? Are you joking me? Some of the best times ever. Isn't that the saying? What is that from? Are you joking me? Yeah, it's from something. Are you kidding me?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Are you kidding me is what it is. But I've heard are you joking me like other places. I just don't know where. Are you kidding me? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Are you kidding me is what it is. But I've heard are you joking me like other places. I just don't know where. Are you joking me is so solid, dude. Yeah. It sounds like another Italian gangster type deal. That's what he says. He says that happy and he says that angry.

Because that's what he said to the Starbucks guy. And the Starbucks guy said whatever. Are you joking me, dude? When he's making his fucking frappuccino, dude. But then the Starbucks guy remembers his order next time. He's like, Are you joking when he's making his fucking frappuccino? But then the Starbucks guy remembers his order next time. He's like, are you joking me? Let's see. I'm so lucky.

I've done cool shit. I've done cool shit with this guy. We've done cool shit yeah nothing nothing is better it's true than that it's true sorry pause it's worth crying we know he's talking we know he's talking about what if he was talking about like Helix mattress or something like that. He had like a breakdown over one of their products. Yeah. Or dude, honestly he could have just got done modding like a fresh new lightning. Yeah, it's better. He's like

nothing. It's better than that right there. That would be so funny if he cried over some truck that he modded or like something to do with his cubby. Nothing is better than opening up that cubby at my son's baseball game. It's a new flavor of rain in his cubby. Yeah, rain, put it in there.

They're like, do we have the combination or do we have another key to his cubby so we can surprise Brendan for our 10th anniversary or whatever? New rain and fucking rogue nicotine flavors. What's the flavor called golden baseball golden baseball let's see yep just happy it's the only thing that yeah it's the only thing that gets me going too just happy that's amazing that's amazing dude can you realize you're doing something right you realize you're doing something right. You realize you're doing something right. There's no baseball and crying, obviously,

but he is talking about baseball and wearing a baseball jersey, and he's the person who said that. Yeah. So it's a very 4D chess. Yeah. Well, I'll tell you what. Nothing is spicier than that clip right there. Let's see here.

This one's another one we're going to watch twice, I think. But it's the biggest clips for the week. Okay, good. Posted by Boppa Bink. It's called Theo Vaughn and Joey Diaz laugh at Brendan Schaub getting stage time at the comedy store. Let's see. Like three of them there on the lineups. It wasn't like nine motherfuckers coming at you.

Oh, my gosh, dude. I thought you were going. From Ali Wong. Oh, yeah. Oh, my gosh, dude. I thought you were going to hit us with the Joey Diaz. I mean, I was laughing because I thought you were laughing, but then you were coughing. Yeah. But sometimes a Joey Diaz,

like, if you feel it coming up, it will make you cough. Yeah. And then you're like, three of those motherfuckers. Yeah, that's what made me laugh. Suck my dick for five minutes in the belly.

He has to call people motherfuckers. Yeah. He has to say, motherfucker, a cocksucker. To you, to D'Elia, it was a cavalcade every Tuesday and Thursday. Everybody got along. Whitney, you, Burt, Joe, Segura, fucking Tripoli, Eddie Bravo.

Owen Smith, Pete Garcia. It was fucking crazy what was down there it was crazy crazy they had MMA fighters that weren't even comedians fucking doing 20 minutes it was fucking crazy

Eddie you know it's funny I watched that whole episode and I was thinking to myself which MMA fighter are they talking about and then they said Eddie Bravo

and then when I pulled the clips today I'm like of course dude Brendan Shaw is a fighter dude I forgot yeah Scoob yeah I pulled the clips today, I'm like, of course, do Brendan Schaub's a fighter, dude. I forgot. Yeah, Scoob. Yeah.

Yeah. I mean, he had one of the best careers I've ever had anyone who's ever fought. Yep. And he said Brendan, meaning Neil Brendan, I think. Not Brendan Schaub. No, no, no. And he doesn't do it just for the folks of it. Yeah, dude.

All right. This is a post posted by Ryan. A picture post. I said a post posted by. This is a picture post. I said a post posted by, this is a picture post by Roy Bean 99. Truly they are intellectuals with a deep passion for the topic at hand, Lopez. Dude, amazing dude.

I forgot about Lopez, but yeah. This is so funny. The passion and dedication demonstrated by participants are palpable. It's clear that everyone here cares deeply about the topic at hand. are palpable. It's clear that everyone here cares deeply about the topic at hand, dude. Are palpable. This is in some sort of language.

Engaging in this discourse feels like embarking on an intellectual adventure with each comment leading to new discoveries. Strawberry. A butt picture. Yeah, butt pictures. Kiss emoji. Pussy pictures.

We need more comments like that dude again it's like if someone is doing this on purpose to fuck with them that's so funny they made they took the time to make a profile and put a butt in there and then write that out that's hilarious it's equally funny if shop is doing it or some cat is doing it. They're both hilarious both ways. All right. This one's posted by successful capital two one seven. It's called more dad shit. It's just also fake. This was a clear mental breakdown. This is not indeed quote happy. It's just all he has now. And he's just now realizing what being a father is. And yet he's still somehow coming off as narcissistic and redacted while it's take talking about fatherhood. Dude, they're tearing him up.

Look at those lips, dude. Yeah. I mean, the lips take away from the fatherhood bit. Yeah. Because it's like, did you go get those done? Why weren't you at the cubby teaching him how to swing? One of the kids is like, hey, did your dad get his lips done, dude? I saw him when I was at the cubbies earlier.

I saw his lips are huge they wouldn't even like understand they would just they'd they'd be like so is it what happened to your dad's face like what's his with his lips they wouldn't know that you could even do that probably or then maybe all calabasas dads are like that yeah it's just a thing they're like well you know every once in a while dad's lips look weird. The kids are like, oh, your dad looks normal now. Your dad looks like my mom. Let's see. Nothing

is better than that. It's true. Sorry. It's worth crying over. Yep. I'm just happy. I don't mean to be that guy but i do produce a podcast yeah this is a cool temperature and chin you got a little bit warm here daddy color balance is off chin i hope you're listening man yeah get get with the product this is one of

the most important podcasts in america yeah We need to see it in cinematic quality, dude. That's just anyways. Yeah. Chin. This isn't fricking, uh, Comptown or something like this. T-Fat K dude. You don't set up the cameras for the fugs of it. You know what I mean?

We need to see this in full quality daddy. Yeah. Uh, this was posted by that guy. 90. It's called Boppa turned off the comments. Soy boy shop turned off the comments on his dad of the year post oh man creator turned off the comments as you can see right there oh man that's the five worst words in television dude you gotta let the people comment you're not gonna read anyways you never read the comments so what's

the point of turning the comments off? Yeah. Yeah. It's, dude, you're trying to make sense of all this, dude. Maybe he's, you know, I mean, he's just doing

like such a good dad. He turns the comments off because like he would be tempted to read them or something like that. True. You know,

because I mean, a lot of these cats just don't get it, right? They don't have, they don't have kids that are, if you eat watermelon every day, what happens to the,

sorry, they don't have successful, first, say good. every day I don't want a watermelon what happens to the sorry they don't have successful say good Christ I hate TikTok so much I know me too it's automatic video is going to be the death of me someday but they what I was saying is like

they don't know what it's like to have kids that are very successful baseball players yeah and have a wife that's spicy and built an empire and done UFC and played for the Buffalo Bills

it's like what did you do who are you how? Who are you? How many chicks do you fuck, okay? Sometimes you're going to cry because your progeny is so successful, B. Yeah. Did you get a golden baseball from your dad? I don't think so.

So shut the fuck up. Shut the fuck up. Go to the barber. Get your hair done. I know, right? Get your lips done, B. Your lips look thin to me. Something about that seem a little feminine to me, though. You know, we're going're gonna watch this a lot of times but i wanted to see it from the source here dude

okay last summer t didn't touch a baseball he's never played baseball he was that i mean i understand what he's. He's just making it more confusing, you know? Yeah. No, I mean, he emphasizes things strangely. Yeah. He's never played baseball. Well, how old is he? Let's see. I want to play baseball.

I want to make the team. I see tryouts. I go, bud, tryouts is two months away. And he goes, okay, can you help me? I go, yep, I can help you. You and I are going to train five to six days a week. He made the team. Before the game, he goes, okay, can you help me? I go, yep, I can help you. You and I are going to train five to six days a week. He made the team. Before the game, he goes, dad, he goes, dad, can we go to Shake Shack if I pitch well?

And I go, bud, I don't care if you pitch well. That's what you don't understand. I just want you to have fun. And most of all, I want you to out-hustle all these fucking kids. And yesterday he did that. He ran everywhere, man. Sweating after the game. No hitter.

No hitter, dude. That's hilarious. Great, dude. One thing is, he's a great coach. Yeah, no hitter. Take that away from him. No hitter. No hitter. Boom. He's in his outfit and I got him these cleats. But I was just looking. I'm like, holy fuck, dude.

Look at this little dude, man. Yeah. And then does this thing. You know? I've had a great fucking life. I've had, I'm a cat. I've had nine lives career-wise. I played football and it was such a good time.

I was in the UFC. Oh my God, the things I did. It was was such a good time. I was in the UFC. Oh, my God. The things I did, it was so cool. Stand up. Are you joking me, dude? Like, you're joking me, bro. Oh, my God. Some of the best times ever.

I'm so lucky. I've done cool shit. I've done cool shit with this guy. Nothing is better than that. Last summer. I'm trying to think of Joe Torre, Tony La Russa, Brendan Chubb. Great baseball man. It's kind of like he's so successful in so many ways

that it sort of denies him some opportunities that could be there because he's teaching his kids right now, making them great. They pitch no hitters, home runs every night, beans and cheese every night, but he could be coaching men. Yeah. He could be showing.

Cause honestly, if you like this podcast at all, the reason that it's good is because Brendan shop taught us how to do it. I'm a, I'm still a white belt. Gerardo's a purple belt. We're not black belts. No.

No. We don't have that. Not a chance. Yeah, dude. Are you fucking joking me, dude? But we learn how to do what we do from him. Yeah. So imagine if he can do that with podcasting.

Imagine what he can do with baseball. Imagine what he can do with a professional team. Yeah. Racing? Are you fucking joking me, dude? Yeah. It's cool. If somebody's like, what can Brennan you could do with like a professional team. Yeah. Racing? Are you fucking joking me, dude? Yeah. It's cool. Like if somebody's like, what can Brendan Schaub do?

Cool story, bro. He can make your life. You're on traction control right now. He can make you on Baja mode. Yep. Boom. Oil and whiskey. Ever heard of it?

Great podcast. Never seen it. Yep. Iron clad. Let's see here, dude. Let's just go. This is one of the last clips. Oh, shit. But I wanted to watch this one first. Okay. Because it's the same thing. here, dude. Let's just go. This is one of the last clips, but I wanted to watch this one first.

So, because it's the same thing. Oh, I see what you're saying. So remember I canceled my Europe tour. I canceled everything. Long clip. I wanted to see him bring this up. I haven't seen anything from this week. Let's see.

Okay. I was into it. I know this more than a lot of the public out there. It's damn near impossible to go pro. I don't care about any of that. But you have to realize last summer, T didn't touch a baseball.

He's never played baseball. He's never played baseball. He's never touched a fucking baseball bat. He goes, Dad, I want to play baseball. I want to make the team. So I look up in our local area. I found out they have tryouts at this local little league. I don't know anything about it. We drive past it, even driving past. I didn't recognize it.

And so I look it up. I see tryouts. I go, bud, tryouts is two months away. And these kids were probably pretty good. And he goes, okay okay can you help me i go yep i can help you so remember i canceled my europe tour and cancel everything i go bud here's the thing i'm down to do this if you commit for the summer your buddies are gonna be in summer camps gonna be at the ocean then we go on vacations the ocean if you want to play baseball we're not doing any of that so your buddy's gonna be be at the ocean. I missed it. So wait, his friends are going to be at the ocean? Somebody's going to the ocean.

Summer camps, they're going to be at the ocean. Then we go on. Oh, I see. His friends are going to be at summer camps in the ocean. Yeah. But he's not. He's going to be training. He'll be neat.

I get it. Vacations. That's so funny. Your friends, they're going to be at the ocean. You're going to want, as kids are always like, take me to the ocean, man.

Oh, can we please go to the ocean? Even today, dude, like, Hey bro, you want to go get some pizzas? Nah,

I wouldn't be down if I wasn't at the oceans. Nah, daddy, I'm at the ocean. Picking up the bag, the ocean bag. All right, let's see here.

Paul, we're not doing any of that. So what we're going to do, you and I i are gonna train five to six days a week nothing crazy but you're gonna learn the game of baseball i'm gonna get some help and then you and i are gonna work dude we're running sprints you're waking up early you're gonna eat right and we're gonna get after it he goes all right dad let's do it okay so he didn't cancel anything what why would he say that? I don't know. I don't know. It's a motivational speech, dude.

It's how you become the best. Yeah. This is what you do. You wake up early. You eat right. You never go to the ocean. That hawks don't go to the ocean, B. Nope.

We work. In the trees and around the ducks at the pond. You know what time kids were waking up? 434. Boom. Yep. Before any of their enemies, which you know what the enemies are? Other kids.

Yep. They asked, they were like, hey, Tiger, you got to wake up early, you know, not go on to vacations and not go to the ocean. You know what he said? Boom. Good. Damn it. He probably said both those things.

Good. Boom. Life rips. Life rips, dude. Life rips. Life rips, dude. Life rips, Dan. No, it doesn't. My life is fucked up. This one's posted by I Actually Hate.

It's called Don't Know Why This Got Taken Down Last Time. This is pretty funny. I saw this one. Okay, yeah. Was there some truth in the allegations? I was out there having sex. Yikes. With the children?

All the time. But it doesn't matter. That's just perception is kind of a lot of people. Perception is a lot of people. I realize how that can get. You don't know people's. You don't know people's. You don't know people. So how do you know? If you don't know them, you don't know what they're.

And I had a chip on my shoulder, too. I was like, well, nobody likes me. Oh, really, dude? One of the worst things about going through something like that. And pause it for a second. Yeah. Ask me if I drank too much in New Orleans. Did you drink too much in New Orleans?

You know, like people were saying that the wedding at an open bar, but I mean, I, you know, that's how they are. Doesn't that sound like a lie? If you start your answer with, you're going to lie probably. But yeah. And if you start following bugs. You're looking all around like,

what can I say? I mean, it doesn't necessarily mean you're lying, but it's not the most honest way to approach a question. Well, you're definitely calculating what you're going to say. Yeah, but I mean mean calculating is one thing i don't know like ask me if i put a sharp in my butt when i was eight did you put a sharp in your

butt when you're eight i did dude how did you find out about that because you talk about on your ways jesus christ don't put that out there like that see this is a real response right here dude you know what i mean you fuck you have one up on your butt right now but that's the sound of the sharpie coming in your ass people just clicking okay i'm done okay the sharpies came up i'm out again all right let's see the rest of this that's the sharpie in the butt face right there crap services sucks Dun dun dun Dun dun dun Craft services sucks And

You It's weird that top button is button I do that sometimes dude come on dude like my shirt looks fucked up without doing it but that's very high up yeah it's just

that isn't true so Cooney do you have small teeth that's why I went to my life but um like Hannibal Lecter it's been four years now

and I I was just out that's how I answer the question because you show up and you're probably like it's weird it's been four years now

and I just went I went to go get coffee and it was with my wife and we were having a good time it was a good day yes yeah yeah yeah I like that it's four years It was with my wife. We were having a good time. It was a good day. Yes.

I like those four years. It was not when you were a kid. It was in my 20s. Having a coffee with my wife. And it was a beautiful day. And it was so nice. and we were smiling and shit. And to be in this room now and talk about that and think about the feeling

and to, like, force myself to not make a joke of it, which is what I'm, I was told to do in rehab. Is, it's difficult, but I guess it's necessary. Not, it's so boring. I don't know. This is so boring.

It is boring. The question was, the interviewer goes, the question was, what were you going to name your comedy special? Are you? Four years ago. It is kind of boring, yeah.

But it's kind of funny too. Yeah. I was thinking of a joke while this was happening. I was like, oh, that's how I know it's boring. I'm not even listening. Yeah. It goes mostly boring, but then when he said the thing is like because i learned that in rehab that's what brought me back in that's a funny thing to say i want my sons to be proud of me and shit and i thought that that was going to be through my status and stand up and all that but it's not

it's just going to be through having sex and they're going to know who I am and I don't know man it's just all such a fucking I hate to say something so generic or like hashtaggy but like man life is so fucking crazy.

And it's, there's so much like love and pain and in it and it's so real and palpable at some times. Oh God. I don't mean to gadouche him so hard with this but it's funny that he's saying this stuff now because it's almost as if this is the first time he's ever thought that life involves

that kind of stuff like he's so stupid that he's realizing now that life involves love and pain like he's just like his life before this was just like, dude, I get blowjobs now? Can you believe it? Fucking dolphins fuck people?

And then he gets canceled and he's like, fuck, there's actually love and pain and different things happen in life. I don't even want to make a joke now. You can save snapshots. That's another thing. He's like, and dude, the apps don't work exactly the way you want them to work sometimes?

Oh, I didn't know that. Why would they call it vanish mode, dude, if it doesn't vanish, dude? What am I doing here? I mean, I was so famous, dude, and now I'm on great white underbelly with this fucking bald guy. I have a shower, showy shower. Fuck my ass. He won't let me talk.

All right, this is called Boppa Catching His Theo Stray Bullet. Talking about the comedy store, Ben SB8. We already saw this or heard this, but this is the visual.

It was crazy what was down there. It was crazy. Crazy. Bro, they had MMA fighters that weren't even comedians fucking doing 20 minutes to him. It was fucking crazy. Insane.

Some would say the craziest. It was fucking wild. Like Joey Diaz turned fucking crocodile hunter. This one's called Thick World's Moribund. What does that mean? Sad mean sad okay worth crying over dark posted by dazzling rabbit 633 if it gets taken out it's because it has a song on it let's see oh really dude i've had oh really dude die tomorrow i've had a great fucking life when

we heard there was a live show there's was no way we were going to miss it. I've been listening to Fighter and Kids since like 2014. Of course he does. He's hella passionate. Brian's funny as fuck. Edge is just funny as fuck, man. I just love these guys. I've been listening for like three years now.

It's a fighter and a kid. Fighter and a kid. This is like crazy. This is a dream. My heroes are out here, dude. My heroes are out here, dude. My heroes are out here. One day. I'm a cat.

I've had nine lives career-wise. I played football. Bill's an alumni here. It was such a good time. I was in the UFC. Oh, my God. The things I did, it was so cool. Come on.

Be cool, dude. Stand up. Are you joking me, dude? Oh, my God. Some of the best times ever. I'm so lucky. I've done cool shit. We don't pay Brandon

What's up dog Oh shit that's Grant Done cool shit with this guy Fuck What was he doing in there Bush bartender Used to fill my glasses I can't talk

No more baddies I can't talk We've done cool shit Nothing Nothing is better It's true Mr. Schaub Sorry for your loss It's worth crying over damn

that was good well edited very funny beautiful montage there dude alright let's get back to some shows dude cause you know what's gonna turn the lights on dude yeah he needs to make another show oh yeah I heard about this is Is this the pizza show? Yeah.

Yeah, someone mentioned that. I didn't realize because I hadn't been on the Reddit, but yeah, he's trying to do like a new Toontown bit, but with pizza. Yeah. Is it like the one bite thing, the bar stool thing? Is that what people are saying? I don't know what bar stool is. I tried to do that once, but I didn't even know what it was. My roommate convinced me to do like a

one bite thing. Not very good. I know Barstool podcast. I didn't know they have like shows. Well, okay. And here's another chance for me to be completely redacted. Am I telling? But my old roommate told me that Barstool started with Dave Portnoy. Reviewing pizza.

Reviewing pizza. He'd go and he'd be like one bite after he ate it and he'd say what it was. Oh, okay. Yeah. Long time ago. Anyways, let's see here. This is posted by Caterpillar hot seven, five, three, nine. It's called fig crush. Dicey dicey little. Okay. That's fucked up. Little talent, dude. Come on, dude. Man, an artist could have just put

little Bapa dude. Come on. This one is posted by haphazard. It's called let's do an interview show Where Everyone is Eating. It's such a good idea, dude. Only Papa, dude. What's up, guys? Your boy Mikey Mushimeshi from One Championship called. Dude, he killed that name. If that's how you say it.

It doesn't sound like it is, does it? Mikey Mushimeshi. I'm here with your boy Jingaling when he starts doing Chinese food. Yeah. We're at the fucking, I don't know what he would say like ramen let's see i mean he said he's in la yeah whenever i order uh dominoes i was oh dominoes is not pizza yeah fair i have that vibe always when i eat the pizza cookie monster vibe yeah yeah like we're ready to Yeah. But then what happened was I just focused on technique and I just needed more technique

and variations in them. Yeah, it's just kind of a cloud over the sport. It's like the elephant in the room, you know? When you think of jujitsu, I know, especially kids now, like, ah, they're on steroids.

Like, no, not all of them, man. You know? So that's, yeah. Kids? Kids? Kids are on steroids, dude? You have to convince people that not all children are on steroids?

Hmm. I don't know about that one. He's definitely not Tiger, dude. Let's see. In my life where God gave me the opportunity to, he's testing me. Like, do I say? Clearly the guy's on steroids, you know? That's why you're the guy to do it.

But you're also a guy. Like the guy was butt scooting and pulling guard and he was just like moving around like Like trying to like dance and stuff. So I just the butt scooting thing. Yeah, it's kind of bad for you Sneako is a youtuber. I don't even know he was he was just some influencer tagging me on his Instagram and He was talking crap about Jiu-Jitsu,

just saying crap about it. And I was just like... He's one of those guys that says it doesn't work? I don't even know. He was saying like... I don't know. He just seemed like he was talking crap about Jiu-Jitsu, being disrespectful to me.

It humbles you. Correct. Because none of us are like that. You can see like... So he has food all in his mouth right they're both eating it's been mentioned that maybe not the best idea to have an interview while you're eating yeah but he it's funny

you get to see if he interrupts still while having like a mouth full of food yeah and the answer is yes oh yeah yeah he definitely the guy was talking about like something about sneeko what he said and then says is he one of those guys that da, da, da, da? You know, he's still doing it.

Still can do it. There's only like about 250 that can do that. Let's see. Because we get fucked up so much in training, right? Like all the years of training, you get beat up. Especially at that level. Like you have to be so talented. Oh, more.

Hell yeah. Oh, wow. Thanks, man. Yeah, they go for it. So that one could be fun. Just throw that out there, Chachri. You can do it. Yeah, fight game. I just shit in the water. Fight game. Keep going. Fight game.

What? I don't know. What is this? And it's just him being ridiculous at the end, I think. How did we miss this clip, dude? Fight game. I shit in the water. Fight game. I just shit in the water. Fight game just shit in the water fight game keep going fight game oh dude that's like jim bruer almost yeah

yeah i mean a lot of comedians can do great shit now sounds you know that's how you get to the table speaking of the fight game this weekend dude what the hell I don't know that took a strange turn the fight game he shits in the water dude until the end of that clip though I gotta be honest I really

want pizza now it does make you want pizza and that pizza looks pretty good this is making me want to get pizza so this is good salesmanship okay not can't take that away from a marketing genius uh this is another haphazard it's called the mike mush uh shutdown app one of our guys let's see here uh like with aljo it was he was the best he's awesome he's one of the best guys ever. We're at UFC PI, we hang out, like good dude. Great guy, great athlete, great fighter. Your thing, because he had a, just for the fans, he had a jiu-jitsu competition, right? And he had, like the guy was butt scooting and pulling guard and he was just like moving around like trying to like dance and stuff.

So I just, the butt scooting thing, yeah, it's kind of bad for viewership, right? And I agree with him, but like if you do a jiu-jitsu match and you're not there to pass the guard and you're just, like, complaining about it, then it's like, what are you doing there doing a jiu-jitsu fight? So that was my logic of what I said. You said that, like, on social media or something? Yeah, but it wasn't even directly to him. It was just people that complained about people pulling guard.

Because a lot of people complain about pulling guard, but jiu-jitsu people suck at wrestling. Yeah, that's why they pull guard? And then two guys then two guys are just hand fighting the whole time and do nothing yeah when people want to see you actually attacking right it's like striking at least strike you have knockout punches and you can knock people out yeah but in jiu-jitsu you only have submissions so how are you going to submit if you're not doing flying sub standing how are you going to submit someone if you're just hand fighting and you both suck at wrestling yeah jump to college i was really good wrestling. Great wrestling. But the thing is, I just feel like if you take someone down or they pull, it's the same thing.

Just pass the guard to some other person. Yeah, I agree with you. I think, and I talked to Chachar. Jesus Christ, dude. The problem is that Shab has said everything. He said every take, he said the opposite of it. So whenever he gets in an interview where someone makes fun of something or calls something out, he said the opposite of it, you know? So whenever he gets in an interview where someone makes fun of something

or calls something out, he has done that. And he's going to get gadooshed because he's talked so much on airwaves. There's no escaping him being gadooshed. Not today, daddy. This is very funny. And, you know, we don't like doing the wife thing, but it's so fucking funny, dude.

Okay, just this once. Check this out. Posted by King Doodoo Duck Jr. Doodoo Duck Jr. It's called Indian or maybe Pakistani guy perving on Joanna's Facebook groupo for her fans. And then look what he says, dude. Shit, I want to fuck my mind. Scroll back up a little bit.'s the caption on this not your typical boy the mind thing really doesn't make me

that would be funny to write on anyone's post dude shit i want to fuck my mind that would be the best that's one of the best comments i've ever seen. This is why you need to read the comments. It's so funny. Like this is not necessary here, dude. Most relevant. Three years ago. Asada do's a man. Shit. I want to fuck my mind.

Asad. Asad is a man. Asad is a man. Asada. Asada. Asada's a man from the fees, dude. Asada's a man. Asada! Kenny Asada! That is so funny. You're right. Shit, I want to fuck my mind.

Hey, how's it going? What's your name? Asada's a man from the fees. I think that I'm going to start writing shit I want to fuck my mind at people's posts. You're going to get fucking shadow banned, dude. Yeah, probably. I was headed that way anyways. What were you saying? Sorry. This is before they don't let, like, this is the wild, wild west

of letting people know what you really want, dude. Three whole years ago, right? Yep. Yep. Shit, I want to fuck my mind. It was a special time back then you could fuck your mind. Yeah, dude, and you could openly express that shit, dude. Hell yeah. I said openly. Hey, you got it. Yeah, you got there. You openly express that shit, dude. Hell yeah. I said openly. Hey, you got it. Yeah, fuck that.

You got there. You got there. Okay, this is, let's go to this one first. Here is DeShafu posted by Captain Logans. It's just in reference to all the dad talk. And if it gets gadooshed, it's because of the music. Let's see. I'm in the city right now and talking about something sad.

I could bring up something that's sad to me. And I could be bawling. But the happiness, it's kind of like I had to either work at it or just like accept this new version of happiness. And with my daughter, this is free again. It's more than it ever was.

It's crazy to have someone pull that out of you. And it's at the ready. And it's just limitless. It's like, I don't need anything. Anything. It's like, I don't need to access it. If I hear her voice, if she walks through,

if I look at a photo right now, something happens to my body. That's cool, man. You know what I would say to Sal if he said that to me? I would be like, I'd wait for him to stop and I'd be like, does she play softball? I would have been like, cool story, bro. Anyways.

Yeah. What do you think about Israel-Palestine? Let's see. You interrupt him. Yeah. While he's talking about his daughter. And for the last one, let's just end off on a little classic. Hell yeah, dude.

It's called Soy Boy Royalty, posted by Thick Boy with Three Cs. He hasn't been around for a long while, dude. Oh, nice to see you. Let's see. Nice. Nice Bob what are we doing here? What are we doing here? This is Britain I'm the king of England

This is This is John Africa I call this piece John Africa Yes and this This made me think about back to a time when how many

chicks do I fuck chicks alright that's the show tune in next week bye bye