10 Minutes of Schaub - Brendan Schaub IS BEST FRIENDS WITH BRIAN CALLEN | 10 Minutes of Shcaub #80

Episode Date: December 12, 2023

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Welcome back to 10 Minutes of Shop. Thanks for tuning in. Oh, man. Okay, so on the last episode of 10 Minutes of Shop, we said that we would do a state test. Oh, yeah. Yeah, where we would test our own knowledge. So if you want to check that out,

we did that on Raccoon Tweety's, our other show. There's a lot of clips, very busy week at Chang's. So if you're interested, check that out. Also, we talk about all of our studio upgrades and the Raccoon Tweety's episode, if you're interested in that. Ever heard of it? Yeah, people were talking about how we need to have the weird angled mics, but these are the mics we just need

to find the weird angle now you know i didn't even see that yeah okay cool cool cool so yeah check that out also uh congratulations to the people that got a chance to see our joe rogan review oh yeah this 2006 special that and is live at the tabernacle we do reviews of that those are also on the Patreon as well. And shout out to the new Hawks and the one of a thousands that have signed up for our Patreon. I can't talk.

Yeah, you guys are a North Star. We really appreciate it. Thank you for supporting the show. For shows ourself, I'm going to be at the Chatterbox in Govina December 17th. Gerardo? December 21st,

I am at the Stand-Up Comedy Club in Bellflower, opening for Jesusa Polvita. And on December 28th, I am at the Ontario Improv with the one and only Eric Schwartz. And then, drumroll please, but the February 2nd, my homie Christian Zaragoza got his own spot at the Yoo-Hoo Room in Flappers, dude. Yeah, the Flappers.

Ever heard of it that's like uh one of our my north stars yeah so gerardo's gonna be there february 2nd so it's a little ways out but i wanted you guys to be aware of that it's a big night but anyways dude yeah okay that's though though that's not why you're here you're here to watch 10 minutes of shop so play the chin clip start the timer now all. I'm glad you started the timer, dude, because we got a lot of clips to get through, man. I wasn't even ready. The first clip is recently posted six hours ago. Made me laugh very hard. Dang. It might not even have been seen in Australia yet. Yeah. Great brains breed. Best praise. This one's posted by pp stains in in a front i like the name it's called uh

into the mind of a redact fat patrick all right do you have any predictions for this well there's something about oh i you know i heard part of the clip when you played that he's gonna say body just more oh fuck that was the funniest part okay here we go here we go let's play this shit gotta remember when you have children that they get embarrassed, and you have to be really careful of not embarrassing them. Because I would scold them in front of people, and it's embarrassing. But then it becomes issues for them, and then it rears its head. I remember being embarrassed.

Is there anything worse than the feeling of embarrassment? You know, it's well documented. I have body morphia. She's like... body morphia issues. Body morphia. Sounds like anamorphs. I would love for him to describe what he thinks body dysmorphia or body amorphia is.

Does he have amorphia? There's only one way to find out. Let's go back a little bit here, dude. Let's do the rewind. Let's see. Feeling of embarrassment? You know, it's well documented. I have body morphia

issues morphia morphia morphia issues morphia yeah yeah like if morphias from the matrix was a woman take the red pill or the blue pill that's a good one b oh thank you yeah uh let's you want to finish this yeah that was the best part but yeah yeah so and i remember when my dad bought that neapolitan ice cream and it was uh it was uh neapolitan i was just laughing at the specific memory there yeah that's neapolitan i think that's that's the three different kinds of yeah ice cream there glad i've had a good childhood eight inches let's see strawberry chocolate and vanilla and i hated the chocolate and i loved the strawberry i remember i ate all the strawberry and i was chilling on the couch like you know my dad was you know he worked nine to work his

ass off came home probably was fiending for some strawberry ice cream goes in there and he goes bren because i was always the ice cream kid he was bren he goes you ate all the ice cream kid. He goes, Bren! He goes, you ate all the ice cream? I go, I only ate the strawberry. He goes, God! Fat pig. Do you think... That's pretty harsh. Do you think his dad was madder because he's like, not even my real son. He's like, this kid who I have

to pretend like is my son and he ate all my ice cream? Gadouche! He's a good man for not gadouching him I mean even if his dad is white that's a very Latino thing to say to your kid dude two birth certificates I mean two words

you got it that's a very Latino thing calling your kid a fat pig my dad did that a couple times one of the thousand B like mean was like god you fat pig but it sounds worse so i'm saying yeah he was just saying he's like god you fat pig like yeah god damn dude and then walked off yeah oh dude really oh tattooed on the heart fat pig yeah i'll be big

bob with fat patrick no calm down bro Patrick. You gave me cow. Calm down, bro. Patrick! Dog, I'm about to give you some meat. You gonna get this hot meat? Fat Patrick is back. Hey! Dog, I'm about to ship this fist around your goddamn mouth, dog. You keep calling me Fat Patrick, dog.

I called you Fat Patrick one time, dog. And on previous episodes, too, dog. I'm keeping track, bro. Hit him with the deal, Fat Patrick. Here's a deal. Bro, you have to call me Fat Patrick. You got to stop calling me Fat Patrick. I hate having it, Doug. What are you doing?

Hey, dude, if there's a line in the sand, that's a line, Doug. Fat Patrick. He has so much fun saying it. Fat dude on the heart. At least he didn't call him Fat Patrick. Yeah. Jeez. Any thoughts on Fat Patrick, dude?

I mean, it's such a funny name. Yeah. It's so random. I don't know what the... It's just another Theo creation. There's no real... Why Patrick? I think Sponge...

I could probably be wrong, but SpongeBob. I don't watch SpongeBob. Yeah. Never seen a great show. But Patrick is fat in SpongeBob, right? I don't... Is Patrick the other guy? Yeah.

The pink thing? The pink starfish, dude. I've not watched that. I actually envy you for not watching it. You got little kids running around. You know, quinceañeras that you have to go to. Cheetos and everything. You're watching.

You're watching, dude. What is SpongeBob? Fucking Rugrats with salsa on it, dude? I got there, dude. I got there, dude. I got there. All right. This one's hilarious. It's a picture post by organic possession 53.

It's called Benden. And as you can see the caption on a video posted by the one and only Brendan shop and addiction motorsports says Benden's Ford lightning is not a lemon. I like the idea of someone taking the time to make that. That's awesome. Yeah. Is one of the producers homeless?

That's the question, B. Oh, shoot. Yeah. Well, thankfully, they didn't put Brenda. That would have been very unfortunate. This one's posted by Joe Damofo. It's called Dana White steals super fight matchmaking from Bapa. Let's see here.

So Dana White was on the Nelk Boys podcast and he said there's going to be a big super fight in 2024, but it doesn't involve Conor McGregor. And then your boy was trending. I'm coming up. I want the world to know. Dude, Brandon's got some pipes on him, dude

You think it's a good singing voice? Oh, the bestest, dude I think it's funny that he's doing It's sort of like a D'Elia thing He's like, he's got his face covered Duh, I can't even, duh I'm about to drop some shit on you right now, duh He copies everything.

You've been doing D'Elia voice a lot lately, dude. I can't stop. That's a disease. That's Callan voice, yeah. I wouldn't want it any other way, B. Let's see. Made that fight up, Joe. Yeah, I just randomly was like,

I was just looking and doing my research, my sources, okay? I did at doing my research, my sources. Okay. I did go to my sources by sources. I mean, myself in my underwear at 4 a.m. Just scouring Instagram. I looked at GSP. I'm like, this dude's getting in shape.

Why is he getting in such good shape? Well, that's kind of like our sources, dude. You know, when we think about things to talk about in Raccoon Tweety's, we're just in our underwear at 4 a.m. You know? Yeah. dude. When we think about things to talk about on Raccoon Tweety's, we're just in our underwear at 4 a.m. Yeah, it's a totally normal to be naked, fully awake at 4 a.m. looking at George St. Pierre's

profile. Yeah. GSP, dude, that's like what you do, dude. Exactly. Seven times a week. Oh, really, dude? We got best brains, B. That's what I'm trying to say. I'm just looking at George's profile. Yeah. Trying to be a little bit more like Bapa you had that grappling tournament they called it off and be like yeah he was hurt i'm like was he or was the ufc like hey bud you're going pretty hard

to pay for this bullshit grappling competition how about you just put on some small four ounce gloves and we get you right back in the cage and he was like i might be down for that like yeah and guess who else wants to do it the guy you're supposed to grapple nick diaz is also down same thing you just put it on some four ounce leather gloves instead of just grappling for 15 minutes you're actually going to punch each other in the face and get paid way more money they both went i'm in and then dana watched my show at 9 a.m. live last week and went, holy shit, Chubb, I've always loved you and made this fight.

It is trending everywhere. It's so hilarious. They're like, ooh, what are your sources? I'm like, there are none, dude, but it's going to fruition, you fucks. Oh, it's hilarious. Yeah. No, I have no idea how

true that claim is that Dana White is getting his marketing ideas from watching Brennan Schaub's podcast, but what I was drawn to in that clip is the merch table. Seems to be a lot of merch. A lot of rain, happy hippo, and then I think Magic Mine.

Gotta be Magic Mine. We gotta get more merch, Papa. You're speaking facts right now. Slacking. We need to get some Alpha Brain in this hizzy. Take like seven capsules of that, dude. You know what I mean?

You know what I heard though? What was that? I heard people talking about this on the streets about Temos. Did you, do you know what I'm talking about? Truck sticker?

The truck sticker? Yeah. No, you love that, don't you? Yeah, truck stickers. No, but I heard that, do you know what people are saying about us? Eight inches. They meant, no, you love that, don't you? Yeah, drug seekers do. I heard that, do you know what people are saying about us? Eight inches.

No, they're saying, Raccoon Tweety's ain't got no merch. Oh, fuck. I didn't see that. I meant to say, 10 minutes of shopping, ain't got no merch. Both don't.

Cooney ain't got no merch. It went a long way. It's been a long way. But you're also not running for president, B. That's true. This one's posted by Dicey Redact. Always love that name. It's called Retail Therapy therapy teach them young very ambiguous title let's see

i'm buzzing dude baby gets out of the hospital today just got the call wow golf clamp golf clamp baby's coming out that's amazing they said they went in there she was like this where's my dad where are they that's pretty funny i like that joke dude what the baby coming out and being like where's my dad that's pretty cool pretty random oh really Oh, really? Very random. I mean, what comedy isn't random, daddy? You're right. You ever had a monster in your closet and thought it was gay,

right? Same thing. Right. Best brains. Wait, how long has she been in the hospital? She had emergency surgery on Monday night, about 4 a.m.

And then it went zero to a hundred and it was super dangerous. And then. Pause it for a second. Yes. You're looking back, you know, you're as an adult, you're looking back and somebody is like, oh, there's video of from when your dad was like new year born. And they're, oh, let's watch it. And then your dad is wearing those sunglasses talking about you. Like, oh, shit, dad, you're cool, man. You're like, oh shit, dad.

You're cool, man. You have an Indians jersey on? Are you from Cleveland, dad? Yeah. Why? You have a camo Indians jersey on and sunglasses from there. That's like the hood.

What is it like when you're a gangster? Remember those little clips where it's like a cat knocking off a glass and I'd be like, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun. And then they put the sunglasses on the cat. Those are the glasses. Thug life. Thug life. That's what I was going for. Best brains thing. Yeah. Yeah, dude. I don't know. I would, uh, I would be like, dad, did everyone dress like that back then? You know what I mean? The Sopranos meme. Yeah. Did you have a bad show? Does Uncle Brendan have a bad podcast back in the day? Did Uncle Brendan?

Let's see. We'll get there. So since Tuesday morning, since Tuesday morning. So it's been a week. Been a week. Couldn't touch the baby. Couldn't hold the baby. My wife held the baby for the first time yesterday. She's been in the NIC unit.

So, you know, with the lungs, they weren't sure. She had breathing too. It was rough. Your wife? No, my baby. Oh, fuck. It was rough. Let me take these off while I'm being serious.

I'm sorry to hear all that. Well, everything, everybody's okay. I'm sorry to hear all that well everything everybody's okay I'm glad people are okay but let me take these ridiculous what if he had like a clown thing

or like one of those like disguised things with a fake nose and the thing let me take this off for a second or he has like a bandana on

let me take the bandana or that soy boy hat that fucking fat fedora hat he's in a full Dragon Ball Z costume. Let me just take this shit off real quick while I'm being serious. No, but it is important to say I'm happy everything turned out great, dude. That could have went south real fast, you know?

Yeah, me too. But I think they should all do that. They should have like, Delia be like, let me put my sword away real quick because I'm being serious. Montez is wearing a Target shirt. He's like, let me take this Target shirt off real quick. He's dressed like Fred Flintstone.

Fred Flintstone? Fred, that's right. He's dressed like Fred Flintstone. Let me put this outfit away real quick. We'll see here. I know. What? Made it through, baby.

Here's the thing. Now you three strong. Baby's coming home today. And my Ford Lightning. Move this man. Move this man. Move this man. Reddit. Okay.

Don't know much about Reddit. Couple of gadushing moments in that clip, which, you know, be cool, right? Sorry, this is not closing. All right, let's go to the next one then. This one is, yeah, congratulations on the new kid though, Bapa. That's fucking dope. Yeah, man.

World needs more Shabs. Yes. Couldn't have said it better myself. And I'm not even a numbersapa. That's fucking dope. Yeah, man. World needs more Shabs. Yes. Couldn't have said it better myself. And I'm not even a numbers guy. The not evenest. Alright, so this one's posted by Eddie Pool 8mm. It's called The Worst Interview Ever. Great title. Never seen it. I don't know who these people are

on here. Let's see. Same shit. But did your parents they had to put putting you guys in this what's with this framing dude why is he so small no i don't know yeah that's a good point parents like parents yeah the fruit parents there had to be a a plan right like there was a plan as far as they do not look interesting. They couldn't just be like, all right, no school today,

just do jujitsu. So I'm... That's a good question. I'm so curious about your dad. Like as a dad, it'd be hard for me to pull him out of school. Like these kids got it because everyone thinks their kid has it.

Especially with... I want Shab to interview us so he can tell me about my life. Yeah. He just tells me what's going on. I don't have to answer anything. It's a good, actually the best interview. Yeah. In my opinion. I just want to hear Shab, dude.

That's it. Yeah. I want to hear Shab break down what he thinks about my life. Yeah. All right. This next one, dude, we all know this clip, dude. Oh yeah. It's called good with the subtitle dicey dicey posted by Hey, as a kite. Gerardo, do you know what time this clip was posted? I think you do. 4.34 in the morning. Exactly, B. Before my enemies. Good. Let's see.

He said, I already know what you're going to say. I said, well, what am I going to say? He said, you're going to say good. They said, we will rape your wife in front of you. I beat me and tied weights to my testicles. Oh, my God. Wait a god wait a minute i was i thought it was just gonna be the good thing good because i can't um hang myself um a couple times good the guitar thing what are you pausing good so it it's like this, it's pretty hard to listen to that and then hear good.

But the guitar thing is so funny that I think it brings me back in. Okay. Like you could say the most horrific thing ever, which we just heard. Yeah. I feel bad for all these people. Yeah. But then when it's like,

I'm back in daddy. Strap the fucking. It's so funny. Yeah. This clip is so cringe. Let's see. America deserved 9-11, dude. Fuck it.

I'm saying it. They're good. So I kicked her in the pussy. Damn. Good. Yeah. I kept the mummified head and skull of one of the victims. Carried the case in my locker at work.

Good. Wow, dude. Compliments to the chef. He came to me and he said that his wife has died. I said, good. That first part was pretty hardcore, but you know. This one was requested by cooney it's called uh it's posted by fox news dad great name it's called walk me to my subway

and it's subway workers saying do you want a six inch or foot long sub and shop saying eight inches i mean perfect yeah well done just great job trim the fat that's that's the joke you know what i'm saying this is the perfect joke yeah good for you fox news dad yes fox news dad coming through with the heater all right this one made me laugh hard dude it's 35 posted by pp stains in a front best name b uh check this out dude 35 is good 35 35 35 yeah it's 35 is the number right 35 wow that's impressive yeah that you can pull all that 35 like that is that's work ethnic if i've ever seen it oh yeah dude how did you find all of them maybe you just go through transcripts and look for 35 you know i mean i wouldn't know how to do that yeah you might chin i don't know stop calling me that all right so this one's posted by minimum sky 2305 it's

called straw this one gave me a good chuckle dude they had a king bach on their last episode of uh golden hour dude wow vine star ever heard of it thoughts on king bach just kidding let's see this yeah i was like in a rush going to a show. I was just getting a coffee and it was transgender, but also try harder. It looked like me with a wig. That's hilarious. Full mustache. They should have put the picture of him and you'd be surprised with the wig.

Yeah, yeah. That would have been good editing. But it's funny. He talks so fast and wrong that you can't really tell. It's hard to gadouche him here if you're one of these woke social justice warriors because it's like

getting a coffee, transgender. You're like, what? How did you get? What's going on? I just know I'm offended. I don't know what to say though. Yeah, you can decipher

that he's saying, I guess, that the person that gave him the coffee is transgender. Also, the stereotype of a barista is that in LA is that they're, you know. Part of the community. Yeah, an LGBTQ or like left or something.

Yeah. So is it? Did it happen? Probably not. Yeah. Probably not. Let's see. I'm going to start it over.

Seattle. I was like in a rush going to a show. I was just getting coffee. Okay. So he was in Seattle. I was in a rush. I was going to a show. so I thought to get a coffee. Yeah.

Right? Transgender. And then he just says, yeah, you know, transgender. Is the coffee transgender or a person? Great question. Let's see this one more time really quick. I was just getting a coffee and it was transgender. He does say that the coffee was transgender.

Yeah, so that's what it sounds like, right? He's saying the coffee's transgender. Maybe he's talking about something we don't even... God knows. Oh, Brendan just called coffee transgender? Like CT. CT, dude. Yeah, CT.

That's what it stands for, coffee transgender. Oh, best brains beat. Let's see. Also, try harder. It looked like me with a wig. That's hilarious. Full mustache. That's hilarious.

And I was just like oh hey bro can i get a straw and he's like bro and i was like oh and i was like just give me the fucking straw dude i said brah yeah and then said brah right yeah so if somebody got mad at you for saying bro would you be like just give me the straw dude would you be like i'm sorry i meant to say whatever you want me to say i wouldn't be like i wouldn't double down and be angry yeah i would say um straw i would just be like i'm sorry i meant i'm sorry yeah my mistake can i have straw straw straw ever heard can i still get that straw brother he's just saying again let's see 100 put out i'm gonna get back yes right but you still do

it's like okay well now we're vibing now we're vibing what are we i don't i don't get the ending yeah let's see what any more thoughts on the straw the way he says straw oh i forgot yeah straw is a classic chav Yeah. And he also has problems with straws. Oh, well, his lips have problems. Oh, that too. He's always trying to get it in his mouth. I've been actually working on my lip technique paws with the straw and trying to do more duck face like Shab does, dude. Oh, maybe you should get some stuff in your lips.

Oh, lip filler, dude. Uh-huh. Best brains, B. Yeah, only a thousand can get those. Yeah, and they're running out of candidates let's see this one it's posted by khabib time uh made me laugh very hard eight second clip tom about fume that's a problem let's see this dude are you ready yeah it comes at you fast dude okay okay talking about our sponsor fume all right f-u-m-e and they look at the problem

a different way not everything in a bad habit is all wrong oh man he misspelled a three-letter word by adding another letter that pays him that pays him Talking about our sponsor, Fume. All right, F-U-M-E, and they look at the prom in a different way. They look at the prom in a different way. If you're a brand and looking for a podcast to say your thing or to sponsor, why would you do this one if you're Fume when you got the accent mark? You know that brand's going to have trouble with the accent mark. Come on, Eddie.

That's his greatest weakness, dude. They don't have marketing geniuses over there, that's for sure. All right, we got another picture post here. It's Chad A-N-X posted this. Low Kick MMA just posted this. The tag is at Huevos Ranch rancheros as you can see nice little mangina right here and the zipper looks undone oh which we've all been there right yeah uh love

seeing him get dunked on in the wild nice little post there the next one's a picture post by user 6590087 please get a name so i don't have to say all those numbers. And it's called Theo has got to go take care of some things. What do you think about this one, dude? Yeah, man. He continues to be doing living very well, it seems like. Yeah. Did the cheerleaders ask to take a picture with him? Probably, dude. That's crazy. Could you imagine?

You get to the stage where cheerleaders, can we get a picture with you? Seven days a week, daddy. Temos will get there one day though all right here we go back to some more videos this one's posted by dicey redact again it's called the amazing racist redact i didn't see this one i just saw the title i was like let's go that was pretty good yeah first travel ball teams uh tournament play so you're playing some pretty good freaking teams, man. You're not playing in that little

league around the corner anymore. These kids are not white and they've been playing forever. They don't miss. It was a good learning experience for the team, good learning experience for my son. He dominated the last league, but they were all white kids.

So he got hit with a fresh, wet dick in the face by these kids who are not white and can play them some ball. Okay? It's a good learning experience for him. What are you, retarded? I know you're not retarded.

But what are you, bouncing? Oh, man. Rest in peace, Norm MacDonald, dude. That was hilarious. But also, dude, boundaries, Brendan. You know what I mean? So much of that is weird.

If you're the producer and you got to cut that out, first of all. Yeah. But then if he keeps doing it, you show him the clip and be like, what do you think is wrong with this clip? Like, where are the moments where we go wrong he's like nothing yeah it's perfect yeah everything is wrong don't don't say that when you're talking about a little league team yeah you that's the thing about shop clips is like the first thing he does that's cringe you're like uh but then it gets even worse you couldn't even imagine i did not think it was going to go into like talking about his son getting hit in the face with a dick.

Yeah. I didn't see that. No. I didn't see it coming, so. Oh, no pun intended. But also, shout out to the GOAT, Anthony Jesnik. He got away with that joke. You know what I mean?

What? Comedians get away with it, dude. Oh, that's right. That famous quote from uh that white boy that worked too much yeah yeah yeah the campbell soup guy yeah the campbell soup he has the campbell soup paintings oh annie warhol annie warhol yes best brains best brains b all right let's go to the next one dude we're on a roll dude a lot of clips today but we got time for him dude this one made me laugh also it's a successful egg eight three four five it's

called jelly roll thanks theovan quote my first podcast i ever did was with you end quote papa who a lot of question marks and exclamation points do you know the reference so jelly roll is gonna not know who brendan is in this clip right. No? So Brendan, remember on last couple episodes of T-Most has been saying like, Jelly Roll, you know, we were the first podcast he was on. And so Jelly Roll like, dispels the rumors, daddy.

Right, saying that he wasn't on it. He was on Theo Vaughn's first. Oh, okay, okay. So let's see this. If you don't mind, while you're thanking us, I just want to start, and I'm sure Ernest wants to do this

too is that as guys that have been friends with you for a while and my first podcast i ever did was with you on thanksgiving week by the way we sit here on thanksgiving week so i want to thank you for everything you've done for me being early being a believer a supporter every time you've ever said something nice about me but more motherfucking importantly theo von we want to give you your flowers. You're on fucking fire. I don't know if you even see it because you're such a humble in your own head, dude.

I know that as you as your friend, but you are fucking scorching. It has been so fun to watch, dude. I mean, it is. Look at him blushing. It was fucking beautiful, dog. I'm so happy for you, man. Oh, they're not going to show another clip?

It's just this whole thing I think so yeah do you think it says the jelly roll and donut but like donut but like

do you think he's saying that because he wants to thank Theo more or that he just wants to dispel the rumor that he did Shob's podcast first

no he's thanking Theo but Chang's you know the translation to Chang's is gadouche papa, dude. Right. Okay. Yeah. And it is funny that he gives, like, people take that term too literally.

I'm glad he didn't pull out flowers. I mean, the cliff's not over yet, so he might do that. Right. Right. But, uh, yeah. I just love it's we. Like, who is, what if we misunderstood the situation completely and the guy on the left is jelly and the guy on the right is roll? That's a good observation, dude. Best brains, B.

Yeah. Redacted. Redacted. The most redacted. Let's see here. So glad to get the call, one, just to get to hang out, but two, to tell you in front of you and your audience that, man, I have never laughed as hard. I mean, I could just bore you with how happy I am in every podcast I've watched and just fucking how genius and brilliant you are.

But the Dana White episode. He feels a way about Theo that Boppa does about Toe. Yeah, why don't you marry him, dude? Come on, B. This one made me laugh also, dude. Hot week at Chang's, man. This one's Minimum Sky 2305. You know he's on the Friars, daddy.

It's called Boppa Gets Caught Out Lying. Weird way of saying he got caught lying, but caught out, right? Let's see what this one's about, dude. We love him. Yeah, we do love him. I was told. Okay, so I thought we probably were the closest out of all of us. You might be close.

Are you close with Eric? I've known Eric were the closest out of all of us. You might be close. Are you close with Eric? I've known Eric probably the longest. But then someone told me that you were going to be on, and I was like, oh, cool. Whose idea was this? Mine. No. No one's taking credit.

This was my idea. It was. No, it's my idea. No. This is my idea. Let's hear how they all go down. Let's hear it. Let's hear your story.

Bullshit! Everybody's in on Bapa just lying and saying crazy shit. We all enjoy it. Us, cats, the people he does a show with. It's a fun thing. It's always a good time when Bapa lies, B. Absolutely. Let's see.

Rike, who we all know, he was like, I was like, yeah, just booking guests is an issue. And he's like, oh, man, you should always hit me up. This is three months ago at the Laugh Factory. And he was like, anybody I know, let me know, man. I was like, well, we love King. And like King's close with all of us. He's like, done.

So then a month later, I follow him. I'm like, yo, what's up with King? Because I don't like reaching out. You met King Charles. Yeah, I don't like reaching out myself. I hate booking people because we're all busy. So then last week he hit me up. He's like, yo, King is down.

I was like, all right, cool. And that's how this went down. All right, that's his story. Ready for my story? Yeah. How did it really happen? This is what happened. What's he going to say?

Before, what did he particularly say? Like, this is another Axe J hotline thing. Hello? No, no. We got a lot of calls about this today. No. It was King Bach's idea. Yeah.

Thanks for calling in. Ring, ring, ring, ring. Hey, hello? No, no. Our dad would never have called him a fat pig. Are you kidding me? Our father? No, no, no.

He's a very nice man. He's also not really Shob's dad. He also resembles Patrick's. He's also not really uh shop's dad he also resembles patrick's yeah so he's also not shop's dad um what's he gonna uh king bach is gonna be like yo i hit chris up on instagram that's it okay so you think you hit up chris good good i don't know this would be the funniest answer because Chav is saying that it's his idea and also he already said that it was his idea

this is a real tingling of the minds two of the thousand right here let's see I'm over there chilling and then I was on the street somewhere I was walking and I was like

I hit up Trevor Wallace and I was on the street somewhere. Okay. I was walking. Really chilling. And I was like, I hit up Trevor Wallace. And I was like, yo, I seen the pod. Let me hop on the pod. And then he was like, yeah, whenever. Come through. And then I was like, I ain't never did Chris's pod yet either. So I hit up Enrique. And I'm like, yo, what's up with me hopping on Chris's pod?

And he said, that's Brendan's pod. Well, yeah. This one. Yeah. Yeah. So that's what happened. Obviously not anymore. It's ours. Is it ours?

Yeah. So then Enrique texts you right then and there last week. And he's like, oh, just go next Tuesday. I was like, that was quick. I've been waiting. Well, you never said nothing. I don't want to deal with it myself. It's always awkward. Yeah, so I think definitely thinking that you want to do Trevor Wallace's

or Chris D'Elia's podcast is a street thought versus an in-the-house thought. You're going to be walking on the street. Is Enrique the new Marg? I'm not sure. He's like, because Marg probably books some stuff. Oh, yeah. I wonder if Enrique's up there. He's got to book all, he's got to book King Bach, deal

with the personalities there, get Adderall, you know, make sure all that. Message baddies. Message baddies, you know, check the numbers, make sure how socials are doing. Make sure that the plant is filled with bottles of Jack right I wonder if Enrique is the guy with the beanie that we saw

that looks like he's in Hamas remember from the other thing oh who knows maybe there has been a lot of Hamas clips on Chang's this week I didn't put a lot of them in here probably for the best yeah alright so this one

it might be cut out of the episode because it's really long and if there's something good in it it'll stay but uh we need to watch him do stand-up but we can't pass by

stand-up because those are gold usually uh posted by pharrell 80s it's called the working out of an all-time classic closing bit the question is did he do

this before gringo poppy or after who knows dude? Let's hope only people in Australia know. Oh, true, true. Let's see. So first time in the house three am hair. Fuck is that fuck whatever? So I get all these cameras, the rain stuff, the cameras, the door by all the security in my house. It is crazy. Get out of the way. So I get all the Ring stuff. What I didn't know about Ring is when you get all their stuff,

you download the app. On that app, there's an entire community snitching on each other. It's like Tekashi69 made this app. It's fantastic. I scroll it for hours. I can't get enough of it.

There's no real crimes on there, but it's still fucking interesting. I scroll for hours. You can even narrow it down to just your little neighborhood. Just the little neighbors around you. So I see my neighbor Susan next to me goes, this goddamn mountain lion ate my fucking cats, man. Enough is enough.

Holy shit, they got a mountain lion problem, man. And Dave to the right of me goes, yeah, that fucking lion ate all my goddamn dogs, man. It was a bloodbath somebody just do something so depressing they're like a pitter patter of laughter so my neighbors

had all their pets eaten by a lion they just wait for laughter right and then another guy was like a lion ate my wife. Hold for laughter. And then...

Do you remember the punchline? No, what is it? That one of the neighbors thought that their Amazon package was stolen by the lion. Oh. You remember that? No, I forgot. I'm sure it's coming up, dude. Let's see.

Okay. And then three doors down, Susan goes, yeah yeah that fucking mountain lion stole my amazon package what do you have to say for yourself cooney that wasn't a patter of laughter dude that was a fucking joke that's true that is a joke a bad joke oh be cool okay we'll cut that part out dude come on that's papa uh papa brendan dude i don't know why there would be laughter for any ate our dog the lion ate the dogs it's like so tragic and then someone's like amazon package but that's not as bad you're right big dick yeah brendan's one of the few comedians that has more alcohol sales than ticket

sales. People are there for the tiger thing. Let's see. So I get an idea that night. I'm thinking, I don't want to introduce myself to the neighbors. Yeah, I don't want to do. Yeah, I got this. So next morning I make a profile. Think neighbor one.

I go, yo, new guy here. course you got a little kitty problem consider it done it's going down roger my neighbor goes oh my god here's the saber we've been looking for i go yeah that's right dude do you like mountain mountain lion meat fire up the fucking grill roger so in my head i'm like all right i need a gun roger this random name there's a that was cut from the special and thick boy number one was cut from the special right right right username on ring the app fire at the grill thomas fire up the grill sigmund that's probably the last name let's see

by my first gun texas that's right Sigmund. That's probably the last name. Let's see. I bought my first gun in Texas. That's right, Houston. I bought my first fucking gun. I never owned a gun. I get upsold like a motherfucker. They sold me an AR-15. It's so intense. It has the Punisher logo etched on the side of it.

It has like a red laser scope. It's so fucking intense. I played Call of Duty like three times. I'll figure it out. Whatever. So my head that thing has shown up three nights in a row at 3 a.m. So my head, I'm like, all right, I'm gonna have my boots on. Don't don't make

fun of me. Okay, so he learned to space that part out a little bit for the special. So this is this has got to be before. Oh, yeah. Yeah yeah I don't believe that the guy in Chang's is lying okay

so it's just showing it's showing the making of the closer which we need more of that dude right we need more of the making this is like

this could be in the documentary that we make about the gringo poppy if we have this in the documentary we need to have an interview with Shaw with like the three cameras

set up and being like yeah you know the reasons why he cut these parts out why'd you get roger out yeah why the thick is the name the username the username on ring is thick boy one thick boy one yeah yeah that's a little too inside i think because it's like they're not gonna know that he has like thick boy merch necessarily in the special but when you're global is anything inside, right? That's true.

He does do global tours. Let's see here. I'll be in my undies. It'll be in bed, right? I'll have my fucking gun, big dick out the front. Anyways,

I threw that in there. I don't know why. Anyways, I'm fucking, I'm basically. Okay. So I'm happy he didn't say sorry about that, dude.

I'm not. I think, I mean, you're happy that you didn't get to see the come in or like, why are you happy? I'm happy. He didn't go sorry about that dude i'm not i think i mean you're happy that you didn't get to see the come in or like why are you happy i'm happy he didn't go big dick on me sorry about that because maybe that lady really was offended dude and he oh so it's a real moment it's a real moment right as opposed to something that's rehearsed all right yeah fair sorry about that is great though it is great yeah but that's what you get mr whole foods we didn't hear that yet you know what i mean that'd be hilarious if you said that if there's great, though. It is great. Yeah. But that's what you get. Mr. Whole Foods, we didn't hear that yet.

You know what I mean? That would be hilarious if you said that. If there was another nacho cheese moment. Yeah. Damn. Where can we get this whole set? Dude, this would be viral if there was a nacho. Yeah.

Yeah. I don't think he's probably ever done that before. Yeah. Mr. Whole Foods, that's like a new thing. That has to be on the spot. That's a one-time thing. Yeah. Or maybe. I mean, who knows? Who knows, Brennan? Let's see. I Foods, that's like a new thing. That has to be on the spot. That's a one-time thing. Yeah. Or maybe.

I mean, who knows? Who knows, Brennan? Let's see. I hear, wow! I'm not from the side. You're like, what's up, bitch? I'm like, boom! You can ride that.

Oh! Dude. Just like the turkeys. Yeah, I love the turkey joke. My favorite shop joke. It took a little bit. I think you should be surprised what he learned there. And he put it into the beginnings of this joke for the Gringo Poppy.

Dude, if it's not broken, don't fix it, dude. That noise he does, I can't even do it as good as he does. Yeah, smartest tool in the shed. Yeah. I look at the camera and go, world star, and then it goes fucking viral. Your boy goes viral. i used to be fucking sick man that next night same thing fucking 2 30 i get fucking balls eating coffee i had six cups of joe with me i got my gun uh undies day out right i'm fucking i'm based on no sorry again

but he threw in coffee he didn't use the coffee in the special what he's doing is not putting all of his corners in one basket oh sharpest crane in the box dude yeah that's oh yeah for sure let's see here here's the thing houston i didn't broke around mountain lions in my head i'm thinking like a bobcat and i'd see it i'm like no fluffy fucking around i've never seen a mountain lion before dude this thing was fucking it was fucking mufasa it was fucking without oh okay so a couple things i wanted to say you saw the jerky herky hand movements there, right? The act out. Who does that remind you of? The Leah Callan.

This part, this, the, the thing like that is fucking Callan dude. Yeah. Yeah. Now, you know,

recently check out the patron. We watched tabernacle, a live Joe Rogan thing. What does he have in that special dude? Similar kind of stuff that Callan probably took from him. Right? Not, not what I'm going for. However, very true. Right. what does he have in that special dude? Similar kind of stuff that Callan probably took from him, right? Not what I'm going for. However, very true, right?

He has an encounter with a mountain lion, dude. Oh, I forgot. Yeah, you're right. The lion on his property or whatever. Yeah. Yeah. He saw the mountain lion. It's exactly like Brendan's bit, dude.

These guys, man, similar stuff happens to all of them. They're living a different life than us dude i think it's part of being like in that like that life yeah like being a murderer the bop averse the bop averse you experience things different yeah you know different timelines different uh situations a lot of fucking things that make it go like that dude you know what i mean and animals yeah and oh can't forget the animals, B. Yeah. Let's see here. It's fucking jack, dude.

This fucking line of the mountains is on TRT. I just went, oh, shit, and shut the fucking door. There's only one thing left for me to do. Do a bunch of math, suck dick, and become Tiger King. That's how I'm going to do it. Oh, that got cut out. What the fuck? Do a bunch of meth, suck dick,

and become Tiger King. Well, yeah, he's just saying because there's a tiger and he was able to wrangle it, he could be like the Tiger King guy who smoked meth and had gay sex. See, the only problem there, I respect your assessment, it's not a tiger oh yeah dude

that went over my it's a lion oh man that's so funny dude we went from lion to tiger and then also isn't that like didn't that it was a debate with rogan and uh uh, and Dice. Remember? What? They were talking about tigers and he's like, tigers aren't the king of the jungle. Oh yeah. There's a tiger. Joe is a tiger. See, when Dice does that kind of stuff, it's funny.

Yeah. But their thing that they do is they're always like, it's just like, and then you got, so it's like, you got to throw the fucking thing in there, dude. Yeah. I got it. You're teaching me how to do it. You should do like TikTok thing in there, dude. Yeah, you're teaching me how to do it. You should do like TikTok videos. Like, all right, here's how we're going to do your favorite comic. You ever want to do a great impersonation of somebody like Crystalia, Brian Callen, Brendan Schaub.

Well, you're in the right place. Today we're doing, and then you do it. Dude, best. Step by step. Are you chin right now, dude? I might be chinning you up a little bit. What the fuck, dude? Might be playing your clip chin wow you're smart dude also another thing too he cut out the part or he

added in the part where he says that the the lion ate joe rogan's trash he didn't put that in here dude i'm just i'm still laughing at that when you're like there's one thing's wrong dude it's not a tiger that's so funny I miss that let's see let's see the ending here do do a bunch of math subject become tired that's how I'm gonna do this only one last thing to do dude you know a joke about gay sex oh that was a good time right that was fun that was good we'll keep that in dude keep it uh all

right so this next one's posted by eddie pool eight millimeter it's called quote nobody knows who you are i didn't watch this we might have seen this on the show before so let's just watch like in the back in the green room and the guy who uh owns all the things he goes hey man uh so i'm not gonna be here for your show so i'm gonna give you a check now i'm like oh no doubt man so i get it and i'm in it's sold out it's big numbers so let's open it up and it's not what i thought i go oh oh uh dude so uh it says sold out so i think there's a mistake here does that come later he goes is that a fact i go yeah man it's in front of the communes oh yeah man he goes no Hey, I'll tell you what,

why don't we go to my office and talk there so we don't talk in front of your friend's business? I go, oh yeah, no problem. I go to the office. He has a cowboy hat on. He puts his cowboy hat on. He goes, here's the problem. You didn't sell out. He goes, nobody knows who you are. I go, excuse me? He goes, nobody knows who you are.'all i go well it says sold out he goes this thing is not sold out it's not even close he goes you're where you got two things working against you sooner sooners are playing that's that's religion around here so sooners are playing ain't nobody coming to your show with sooners yeah and then he goes and then also you had that tornado that ain't helping either pop yeah i go oh yeah no doubt dude and then also nobody knows

who you are but he goes he goes in la new york i'm, dude. And also nobody knows who you are. But he goes, in L.A., New York, I'm sure you do fine. Here, nobody knows who you are. Yeah, you keep saying that, dude. But it said sold out online. He goes, we do that to comp the regulars who want tickets to the show. I go, 2,000 tickets? He goes, this thing wasn't moving. We have to do something.

Wow. I mean, it's almost, it's a talent that he's able to create these characters, write out a whole script for them as if they really exist and said these things. He does it just based off the, he has all these stereotypes in his brain that he uses, that like he creates scripts for. He's like, there's a guy, right? He's from the South, right? He said, so that nobody knows who you are, right?

You got the Sooners, okay? The Sooners gang. Also, there's a tornado. I bet if you're like, look, there's no tornado that day. He's just like, it's impressive. I don't think this happened. Is that your takeaway? That is my takeaway.

Wow. Yeah. Unreal. I don't know. It's also funny to make up something that makes you sound bad. Listen, dude. You have your fucking whatever narrative you want to paint, right? Sure.

Dude, these shopisms are so coming like quickly, dude. That's so crazy. You can't even help it anymore. Yeah. You speak full Chauvinese. It's a second language. Anyway, in any facet, dude, these are not made up characters, right? In any facet.

He meets them. Yeah, he throws in a couple lines, dude. But what do you expect from the world's best storyteller, dude? Okay. The guy talked like this and had a cowboy hat. He brought up the Sooners. Yeah. Tornadoes.

There's a tornado. He just happened to bring up the stereotypes for that area. Yeah. Because those stereotypes, where are they? Yeah. Tornadoes. There's a tornado. He just happened to bring up the stereotypes for that area. Yeah. Because of stereotypes, where are they? Yeah. True. Yeah. Okay.

Listen, we got to go. There's a huge gun convention down the street too. Nobody knows who you are, okay? Tickets were not selling, so we told everybody that he was sold out. And that makes a lot of sense. Yeah, that doesn't make sense, dude. Yeah. That doesn't make sense.

I wasn't't gonna go to shop but then i was you know i love shop we're struggling with ticket sales so anyone that tries to buy tickets sees that it's sold out that makes sense yeah okay i'm on your side now dude i'm on your side now yeah i don't know i don't understand it why he's doing this it makes him look bad yeah but and maybe he thinks it's like a funny story yeah also hey chin film this real quick yeah why would you film that yeah yeah it makes no sense check this hey chin i'm gonna talk to chrissy d real quick film this and then she's like you got it dude chris is like uh all right yeah film us our conversation we're just having outside of the podcast he's like so which bland

white door is the exit real quick yeah let's see so so i go well i i go dude look out there there's like 18 people in the crowd dude this is a giant fucking theater and he goes here's the other thing you're dealing with we are native american time so i gotta start on time i go dude i can't go out there for 18 people yeah i go just bring him in the back i'll do the fucking show in the green room dude please don't make me go out there yeah i'll tell you what you can do put the cow down he goes you can go out there and you're hell of a show that's what you can do yeah oh yeah no doubt man fucking what any and he goes you do well i'm gonna have you back tell you that maybe we'll have you back a few years yeah did you eat it in front of the 18 people or was fine so as as my opener

what's his answer dude what's his answer i think he's gonna say he crushed okay it's pop we're talking about yeah he's so he's mentioning the openers he didn't give a yes right away which is probably what you should do especially if you're asking this to be filmed you know what i mean um so i'm gonna say maybe his his openers they struggled but i came out and i fucking my team yeah my team fucked up the team yeah always blame the team great papa ism right there let's see on stage the from the tornado people start coming in but it still wasn't like no no way that'd be good my feelings are hurting nobody know who y'all nobody he kept saying okay didn't mention how he did that was

the question papa yeah no that's uh that is crazy sad sale sad tale from the bopper oh it's just it's insane uh from a comedian's perspective to say i will do the show in the green room no one has ever said that i know you guys aren't part of the a thousand most of you but that's a ridiculous thing to say oh co-oh, Cooney alert, taking things literally, dude. Come on in the green room. No, no. It's pretty normal to do a sparsely populated show if you're a comedian. So the idea that you'd be like, I can't go out. I can't go out there.

There's only this many people. I mean, if they want you to do it and they're paying you, you do it. It makes no sense to be like, come on in the back where there's, you have a, you have a green room that seats 18 people. Impressive. But what would they, the waiter comes in the green room.

The whole reason the green room is that the audience can't go in it. Makes no sense. All right. This one is posted by scrims. Campy scrims. Can't be. Jim can'ty, but with misspelling.

This dude can't be real. Alright, let's see. And Bob's like, dude, I'll pick you up in 15 minutes, dude, just get ready, pack. And I go, alright, well, let me pack my stuff and then let me get Dolly's stuff. Dolly was my chihuahua. He's like, you're not bringing Dolly. No, you can't bring the dog to the hospital.

I go, what do you mean? You're not bringing Doy no you can't bring a dog i go what do you mean you're not bringing dolly yeah fair point let him talk down yeah you can bring it all yeah it's very opinionated about this dog thing let's keep in mind this might be the addy phase he's out of that now hopefully right so that's addied up addied up i feel freedomed up You can't stop Alpha brain Tiger thick Rogue nicotine Helix mattress Panera lemonade Damn

Panera lemonade got me dude Let's see We had to drop We had to drop Dolly off at The shelter We'd have to get rid of her You could have just left her in the crib It was three or four in the morning

I didn't want to like just drop I didn't know who to wake up. So you gave her away forever? God dog. Wow. A little adversity is like, see ya. Whoa. Self-kidoo. See, that's the problem you run into when you have a pod. You say one thing and then years later you

give your dog away. Especially if your chin is not cutting it out, dude. Exactly. Wait, what? Oh, cutting it out, dude. Exactly. Yeah. Wait, what? Oh, let's deal with having a pod. You could use yourself on your ways. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

That too, that too. Second point, yeah. It doesn't cut out these clips where you, you're right. Yeah, don't brand your podcast to be uncensored, unedited because you need to edit some things, dude.

Yeah. That's what the best brands would do. Oh, yeah, dude. Let's see here. This one is posted by P.B. Stainson. He's killing it. Lips and Diddler grading news show the best brains would do oh yeah dude let's see here this one is posted by pb stanton from he's killing it uh lips and diddler grading new show is getting better views than any of boppa's uh

okay so chris dilley and brian callan started a new show good let's see dude i don't know if this that's a true statement though do you think this is a real show i have no idea i assume so but it's i don't care how many views it gets i'm not a numbers guy my show papa's got to be involved my show is the fighter and the kid okay and golden hour you're like those two shows don't even show the clip dude no no i want to see the clip he's in a french thing yeah french hat i haven't seen this clip yet because i just read the title i was like that's going on the show dude yeah look at him let's see with the waffle shirt all right i'm gonna do his lips so i need a real thin paintbrush

fuck off dude i have i have a nice mouth i i babe you have a thinner you know what give me a toothpick for his lips dude no you have a bulbous nose i didn't realize it what yep it sucks i don't have a bulbous nose i have a fucking Roman-esque nose. I have a... Yeah, it's Roman all over your face. No, I have a Roman-esque nose. Yeah, you got a Roman nose. It's Roman all over your face.

His nose is moving around his face? Yeah. No, I don't. I don't. I don't think it's nice. I think Groucho Marx did it. I told my son I'm going to dedicate myself to him for baseball. I'm missing my kids.

Freaking Little League games. If you're scared, go to church. I know the point that Cliff is at. I don't know the point. I'm assuming it's like saying, look at Bapa being ridiculous or whatever in comparison. But the clip was not good until Bapa came in. He made it great. It's like two morons talking about their faces.

And then Bapa comes in and he's hilariously magnetic. Just being like, uh, look at my kids. Stop. Softball games coming up. Going to be in Melbourne, Florida. Uh,

the sixth. I can't wait to see my son play baseball. F-U-M-E. He's effortlessly hilarious. You've mentioned this many times before. The one thing we cannot gadoosh about these guys is the outfit choices because we love to dress up, daddy. Yeah, they got good shit going on.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Big boy merch? French hats? Wait, diet starts Monday, dude? Yeah, dude. Diet starts Monday? Okay.

Okay. We going to get some merch, daddy. We are balls deep in merch at all times. Let's see here okay this one made me laugh uh oh yeah this one we watched on the uh patreon i mean we watched rogan who was very sam kinnish and kim is kinnison s yeah uh patreon we also did a couple of uh boppa versions of sam kinnison's name i thought that was pretty fun all right kenningsley or something like that um so yeah 12 washing beard this is togen's north star question mark let's see if you want to stop

world hunger stop sending them food don't send these people another buying phones you want to send them something you want to help send them you hauls send them you hauls some luggage and send them a guy out there that goes hey Send them U-Hauls. Send them U-Hauls, some luggage, and send them a guy out there that goes, hey, you know, we've been driving out here every day with your food for like the last, I don't know, 34 years. And we were driving out here a day across the desert, and it occurred to us there wouldn't be world hunger if you people would live where the food is!

You live in a desert! I feel you. You live in a fucking desert! Nothing grows out here! Nothing's gonna grow out here! You see this? Huh? This is sand.

Yeah. It's sand. You know it's gonna be a hundred years from now, huh? It's gonna be sand! You live in a fucking desert! Get your kids, get your shit, we'll make one trip! We'll take you to where the food is! see if you if you don't like this sam kinnison clip you don't think it's funny you gotta understand the context of the time this is blowing people's minds yeah you know like nobody had done it like this before yeah i'm starting to sound like the murder and you you gotta be there at the table

you know at the store people weren't like you know starving people need to move yet but you know i'm being kind of serious when you go to the table at the cellar, you get roasted. Okay. Yeah. I was wondering, I thought this would be fun to do. Take your favorite gringo poppy bit and convert it into a Sam Kiddin' Zip It! Okay. Okay. All right.

You go first. Okay. I don't want to steal yours. She making beans every day fucking tortillas i need a tater tot once a week that's good that's good yeah okay white man handout i got one okay okay all right i see i see you there i see you there be cool be cool mr whole foods you're freaking you're over there you're dipping your finger and you're dipping it now you're nacho cheese i'm not good at sam yeah i like the idea of i wish somebody with a can of kinnison who could do a perfect accent would do the mr whole

foods in that do you want to try it only if you suck my dick for five minutes in the belly i won't do that I want that looks like we have a lot of leaves in the ground today alright that was fun worth it this one is posted by Khabib Time it is called rate the new single from

Thick Boy Stews if it gets gadooshed from the episode it's because it is copyright but it will be on the episode it's because it is you know copyright copyright shadow ban but it will be on the patreon let's see and the guy that directed this is me two shots of the whiskey need two more songs on the jukebox i say that's from all our like uh shows oh come on, dude.

When you make music, dude, it's easy. I don't want chin to talk over it. You don't make music, though, dude. What? I notice whenever I show people my music, I can't stop talking sometimes, dude. It's hard. You're gadooshing yourself. Don't gadoosh yourself in the foot.

That's why I'm not Jelly Roll. If Jelly Roll shows you a song, he's not going to talk over it, dude. I'm Jelly Roll. This is my brother, Potato. What the fuck was that guy why did he keep saying we is it because he's that fat he has to be like two people we came to this you know you're the biggest part of our life that'd be you get so fat that you have to start pluralizing yourself all right that was really good. I'm not going to talk. Let's see.

Potato. Only one thing on my mind again. If you leaving and you leaving me right back here alone, baby, we both know that I can go to bed on my own. Cause we know we won't let this go. No, we don't. Just stay slow. Cause we don't come. And you said I ain't leaving, leaving, baby. that's my favorite part dude that song makes you want to get some hot cheetos, dude. That's exactly what I was thinking.

Yeah, dude. I wish I had a freaking bag of hot Cheetos in my hand right now. I'd just be eating it, listening to the song, vibing. I unironically kind of enjoy every song. Yeah. Except for when we played those rap songs. You remember like the audio, just the audio of it? Oh, yeah.

Those are pretty bad. But this is good. And the last thing we listened to was good. And people were like, turn it off. It's awful. I'm being dead serious. But this is good. And the last thing we listened to was good. And people were like, turn it off. It's awful. I'm being dead serious. I'm enjoying this. You can have your opinion.

You can have your painted narrative. Okay. But you may think it's blockbuster. The blockbuster is this. We think, I think I speak for both of us here. It's an egg flick. Do you agree? Chin's voice is like a fucking flying dove at a funeral.

It's beautiful, dude. I think Chin's voice is a hawk. And some of the rap songs were duckish. But even like the Thick Boy Squad, I like that too. Yeah. Yeah. The music is good. You know you saw the merch, dude.

The Tiger Thick fucking jersey. Oh, duh. You got one, dude. I didn't see that merch, dude. The tiger-thick fucking jersey. Oh, duh. You got one, dude. I didn't see that merch, dude. The merch is great. I like the shot of the empty venue. Sitting, kind of basking in the glory of the show that you produce. Yeah.

I think it's all great. Do you have a boat? If Bapa fucking directed this, he should quit comedy. What's Bapa's boat's name? Eight inches. Betsy. Betsy. I don't know.

Boppa Betsy. I don't know. Boppa's boat. Betsy just sounds like a boat's name. All right. This is almost over. Let's see. Ryan's so stone-faced.

Taking it in. It's great i love it man so good thanks dude great wow yeah brings a tear to my eye b that is a solid song it's good yeah i'm adding that to the 2023 playlist daddy you know i came here chan because i i wanted to tell you i want to give you your flowers, okay? Your songs, where you're rapping and singing are very good, and I know everyone's not told you that, but I got to tell you right now that we, and by we, I mean my fat ass,

love your shit. Me and my brother, Toe Truck, love that song, dude. These are good. Jelly Rolls Partners names. New segment idea. Man Ham Sandwich, love your shit brother me and stouffer's home cooked pizza we think you're great okay me and little caesar over here all right this one's posted by a parent shop me and jar of mayonnaise him is mayonnaise thank you you're doing a great job

thank you take it away gerardo me and french's mustard over here all right so this is i just shopped you i parroted you no no you did great uh this one's supposed to be a parrot shop it's called steve-o is team bobby uh-oh yeah so let's see this one dude i had to go to the streamable for this one because uh so many clips that got that got douched on us let's see here your role in the in the whole Bobby Lee saga with that whole drama

with all the other comedians I love Bobby I'm like protective of him because I love him and I don't like those guys being dicks to him but I don't know what your relationship is. There are certain people who I took a stand for Bobby. You did?

Yeah. Good. Took a stand for Bobby, and that's how it is. The thing is, if you're going to be a dick to Bobby, at least be funny. Right. If you're a shitty comedian and being a dick to Bobby, then you really just have nothing going on here's the fart you know why steve-o has this view dude

it's because he's casual yeah he's a casual brendan shop fan he's not like me and you yeah seven times a week hawks not ducks yeah we are brendan shop fans stan stands okay right i was i saw you the other day i was writing a shot you didn't write me back i asked you to be on timos you told me you didn't respond that's okay i still love you dog what about hopping my trx real quick yeah you i don't have hair you gotta bleach your fucking hair dude oh i've done it you've got to bleach your hair like stan do for a brendan shop sketch okay how about this you've already colored your hair for one show if this fucking episode gets 900 likes i will do that dude he'll

bleach his hair let's get there cats any way you can i this is an idea i just thought i've pulled out of my ass yeah but i think it would be great for the show. But what about we bleach your... Oh, fuck. Yeah. Okay. Got him. I don't have hair. Don't start crying, bro.

It's okay. I'm going to start... Yeah, listen. I can't talk. All right. Let's go to the next clip here. Got to close those two. Okay.

So this one was kind of redacted but i did laugh so i wanted you to see it oh nice um it's called theo loving papa's dream uh i guess living papa's dream right uh posted by complex situation that's a cool name yeah let's see this one dude down the track it's me machine in the red and black ain't nothing finer in the land than a drunk obnoxious Georgia fan go dogs

go dogs go dogs go dogs sick em wow Go, Dogs! Go, Dogs! Sick'em! Wow. Give me Alabama to break. Theo, you're on. Theo, you're on.

What happened just now? What just happened? Unbelievable. That's crazy, dude. College football is out of control. I like how he gadooshed Georgia at the end there in Alabama. Maybe college football we should look into. I don't really follow it too much.

I know Brennan knows about it. You know, dude, I need to stop doing this because I think that you're going to say something else. Oh, what? And then I just like, I lose hope sometimes, you know? Of me? Yeah. Because I feel you.

Because my takeaway was that Pat McAfee, dude, woke up at 4 34 that morning before his enemies dude oh shit yeah he saw those Georgia fans and what did he say good exactly exactly dude Georgia fan Georgia fans watching that and be like fuck Pat McAfee just said that Alabama's gonna win good damn I missed it. All right. This one's we got a couple more. We got so many clips today.

Jeez. This one's posted by Pharrell 80s. It's called even for Brandon. This is a wild pivot in a week. That's not his name, dude. Nothing is a wild pivot at this point, but the good title. Yeah. And then black belt in podcast.

Paul casting is hilarious. All casting. Let's see here. point but the good title though yeah and then black belt in podcasting podcasting podcasting is hilarious podcasting yeah let's see here i'm missing on sunday because they they went one and one and then they made it to the sunday game sunday i don't know what's going on the boys were just off maybe they don't like to play on the lord's day but the bats weren't connecting and they uh they got dealt with man it's so funny a normal person watching this clip would be like oh dodgers or fucking some baseball team he's talking about his children it's december dude be cool or oh yeah i guess baseball's not going on now no i'm not a sports guy daddy well that's not good. Using yourself. Cause baseball, you know,

as you were, we're going to get good dudes from all angles for what, with this last 30 seconds. Oh, we're going to get good douched in the comment section, dude. Probably good. Yeah. This is a Mexico hat.

Yeah, dude. Tiempo prestado. What's up? Means. Oh, Chile. All right. Let's see. We're off Which means carne asada. Chilelea.

All right, let's see. We're off the rails. I love it. Let's go. Right now, though, I've done a lot of cool things in my life. Football, fighting, stand up. Nothing is better than when your kid is playing freaking Little League baseball. Oh, my God. I want your child to eventually be able to support you financially.

Hell yeah. That's what I'm talking about. It's all the time. Code switching is hilarious, dude. Hell yeah. Hell yeah. Oh my God, let's go. Baseball.

Because baseball, there's no salary cap. And I don't even like baseball. We're the same guy. Oh, you don't like baseball? No. Oh, shit. even like baseball. We're the same guy. Oh, you don't like baseball? No. Oh, shit. I like baseball.

He hates baseball. Good stuff, dude. Good stuff. I mean, you know, to be on Brendan's side real quick, when him and Eddie Bravo were talking about it on The Companion, I don't know why I know so much, dude. This is embarrassing that I know a lot about shop. I mean, I think it's not for our audience. Oh, no, no, our audience oh no no no true true true yeah it's part of the job b but you clocked in okay when you

clock in at the restaurant you just wait around you learn you make food and you learn how to make food wow dude we could put motivational music it's never done dude oh wow the chef comes up to you and they're like did you know that brendan just mispronounced uh the name of uh freaking joe biden jay brim's pronounced joe biden's name you're like no dude you learned that though good but anyway i liked it i could put some motivational music and it'll make it all come together dude yeah yeah you want me to do that i yeah anything to help me please give me another one go for it so you're you're uh you're chopping up some carne asada right like always the thing chef comes up to you and they're like dude brendan just called the president of india gay and you go you're sweating because you're in the weeds you're just chopping up it's like you don't know if you can even edit a clip like that you know how do you how do you make that

even funnier but you do it good not only does brendan say it but he wants you to clip it chin or he wants you to chin it clip and then they play a rap song where chin sings big boy big town oh but anyways to finish the thought him and eddie bravo shit on baseball on joe rogan so right yeah so he's dude he never lies i keep telling you guys this yeah um all right so this one's called a big brown shutdown nice by haphazard finally a hap clip dude oh good to see you hap oh let's see here let's say well of course you want you want against mma guy who's a stud but i was telling him it it

never made sense to me when they do mma versus high level grappler because the mma guy is not going to play the game so it's not that exciting. Well, why? Because the MMA guy stalls and keeps going. Yeah, it's difficult. You know, like in jiu-jitsu, it requires two guys to really want to fight, you know,

and make it exciting. You know, you don't really know who wants to fight until they're in there, you know, so it's tough. I would imagine MMA

is more just trying to neutralize so that he can blast you in the face as opposed to, you know, engaging. Yeah, but I'm saying he's doing straight jiu-jitsu. It's an MMA guy.

He's a black belt, but there's black belts. I have a black belt. I have a black belt. Oh, my gosh. Yeah, it's a big different black. Have you ever rolled with an MMA guy that gave you fits? What? What did Brian say there, dude?

God, no. I was just trying to relate. Have you ever been to Afghanistan? One thing I'll say about Hap is that he's a beast of an editor. Yeah. You know, very well cut in there. You know the reference, right? What?

When he fought that one jujitsu guy and didn't really do anything. Okay. So for him to be saying this and to have had that history is ridiculous. Buck Wildest, dude. Let's see here. This one's posted by, uh, uh,

bro. SIF yellow. It's called just beat Bapa in my taco. The subtitle, walk me to my truck with a peach emoji. This one made me laugh. Uh, we got to pause it at some point and see if it is actually Bapa.

Okay. Let's see. Let's see here. No, that's not Bapa, dude. No, that's Chris Evans from the Marvel movie. No, I don't think I'll do that. Yeah, I don't Bafa, dude. No, that's Chris Evans from the Marvel movie. No, I don't think I'll do that. I don't want that, dude. No, that's not even Bapa, dude, but it's a good little addition.

It's Captain America, B. Is that the first or second truck, dude? Ever heard of it? TRX, baby. Demon Raptor. Yeah, demon time. All right, let's go to another hap clip, dude.'s called these guys are best friends who talk every day a little good douche i'm assuming let's see it's show business it's no let's get into my mustache let's get into a lot of stuff get off

my nuts what if we started like that don't you just again there's so many times you could edit into like a whole segment of us being like why wouldn't you edit that out why wouldn't you edit that out get off my nuts I said that to you

or you say it to me get off my nuts from the beginning of a jelly roll song gives my new song Or you say it to me. Get off my nuts. From the beginning of a jelly roll song. Gives my new song, get off my nuts, with my brother Ham Potato. I can't even think of more names for that guy. With my brother Subway. This is my brother Ketchup Sauce. Subway.

This is my brother ketchup sauce. Subway. Eat. This is my brother eat fresh. Potato. This is my brother Tulsa right here. Tulsa, Oklahoma. All right, let's watch that one. The beginning is fire, dude. Get off my nuts. Get off my nuts.

It's show business. It really is. Let's get into my mustache. Let's get into a lot of stuff. Get off my nuts. We just need each other, buddy. You ready, Chin? Let's go.

Oh, we started? We said let's get into the mustache. Yeah. I spent Thanksgiving by myself eating a large pepperoni pizza. Have we not talked about Thanksgiving? We haven't been in here in seven days. Oh, my God. It's so weird.

Longest break I've ever had. You ate a pepperoni pizza? Because my girl had the emergency C-section, unexpected shit hit the fan. So I spent most of the time in the hospital. I had to go back to get all her stuff because we just rushed out of the house. So I go back to the house. We've already seen this part. How long is this clip?

It was funny that their best friends hang out every day and they haven't talked about Thanksgiving at all. All right, let's see this one. Fighter and the Kid. Come on, baby. It's a good day, buddy. It's a good day. We got two things going on. We got...

Baby came home? Well, not yet. Baby, we got the okay. He doesn't know. It's funny you anticipate it being even funnier. We got two things okay two things that are big deals you're like what's he gonna say dude

it's a good day because they have two things they usually have nothing yeah that's what Chin's job is right Chin's gotta bring the topics dude yeah you should if you let two hawks come in with the top you want to know what the ducks want to hear dude that's why you know it's important for chin to come up with them right

if i'm chin i'm looking at him and i i'm like brennan camo indians jersey why yeah why why pretty wild yeah yeah are you a cleveland fan what is this it's matching dude i mean to give credit to bren though, it's not baseball season. It's basketball. I would expect him to be wearing some basketball gear. You know what I mean? I guess he just likes baseball jerseys, you know, and teach his own, but I just like...

You have all these thick boy jerseys. But he hates baseball. And he hates baseball. He hates baseball, but he likes the aesthetic of baseball best brains be all right let's see go pick her up so baby's out of the hospital thank good dear sweet lord it's a long time you get that call right shout out to the nick unit at cedar cyanide they're angels they are look guys well there's i don't know that's a weird

relationship they have dude who them two oh yeah it's like they're just both talking, but not to each other. Yeah. Well, Brian just wants to plug his shows in Melbourne. Oh, true. He's just waiting, killing time. Yeah. Plugging shows to cancel them, dude. You'd think they would be overdosing on Magic Mind and Rain, you know, the amount they have there.

Who knows what it actually does. Maybe they're drinking it left and right. I fear that they're not drinking it. That's why they have their relationships on the rocks, you know, the amount they have there. Who knows what it actually does. Maybe they're drinking it left and right. I fear that they're not drinking it. That's why they have their relationships on the rocks, you know? Yeah, not enough. Sometimes you can have not enough magic mind. Kratom. Kratom.

Helix. Helix, dude. Boom. Rain. Boom. Let's see. Aristocrats are back. Aristocrats are back.

Well, no, not me. You. I was on daddy duty Tiger had a for you and your fantastic weekend yes yeah I got here

I was on daddy duty let's do that is he solving a Rubik's cube I think he's opening rogue nicotine or kratom or magic vine but it's funny

yeah they won't he's like before we let you talk I'm going to talk and he's like actually I'm still talking but you're talking when I'm talking and both of the stories are boring.

Yeah. I feel like there's a trouble in paradise. I think this is just the way they talk. Oh, yeah. They probably do this with anybody. True. When,

when they're backstage at Rogan studio. Plus there's nothing. Yeah. Yeah. There's nothing to zap. Like Crowder has nothing to like zap him with, you know, there's nothing stopping Brian. Yeah. has nothing to zap him with. There's nothing stopping Brian

with Brendan Schaub talking. What Brian should do is start slapping that chair. That'll get his attention. That's the new form of podcasting. This is old school, traditional, where you just talk over each other. The new form is slapping chairs, knees.

Jesus Christ, I'm sorry. I slapped my chair too much there, dude. That's all I had to say about that. Oh, okay, knees. I'm sorry. I slapped my chair too much there, dude. That's all I had to say about that. Oh, okay, yeah. Yeah, these new podcasts need spoons. They can start going... Yeah, bring some music into it. Yeah, we'll see here.

That sounds like what? A Calend bit. And my friend, he was like, a spoon guy. You know, when you're in a fight, you got to get a spoon guy to make the music where you're kicking his ass with a shovel let's see i haven't seen you since i know baby came home thank you for giving him mouth to mouth uh baby came home she's all good baby she's all good so chang's investigators figure out what that means yeah i don't know what i still am confused by that yeah i i purposely didn't put that clip in here no yeah we won't but that's still just a wild thing to say dude that's uh out of pocket papa imagine if uh i accused you of giving kids

of mine mouth to mouth dude is he saying that he saved the baby's life let's just see really quick one more time right here uh baby came home yeah he's all good baby she's all good she has two i know baby came home thank you for giving him mouth to mouth uh baby came home so it's a joke about bait like saying brian saved the baby it's kind of weird though because brian it's just a weird thing to say. Yeah. She's all good, baby. She's all good. She has two brothers. And then Tiger had his first travel ball tournament.

Yeah, but then most times five guys. We all give up at the end sometimes. Yeah, dude. Something about five guys. we all know about that right all right let's go to the next clip we only have three left folks please thank you for staying with us here it's called electric cars are like a microwave steak posted by haphazard dude oh we got a lot of haps coming at the last minute right now boom boom's see here i love it and then also with you know with my son i take him on all the car stuff whenever i buy a car doing thing car i always

bring him with me because this younger generation come up with all electrical stuff and it's it's i don't have any issue with electric it's just it's not good so i tell my son is he'll be like yo dad is that tesla faster than this or is that electric car faster so i went yeah yeah it is i said uh just because it's faster doesn't mean the build quality or the amount of work that goes into it is good i said so your steak tonight i can cook it faster in the microwave or i can go old school and put on that fire grill which would you rather have he's like the grill like that's difference between gas powered and electric just because it gets maybe quarter mile faster does it mean it's better there's a lot that goes into them man so they hate teslas every time i see a tesla my four-year-old was boo

so yeah we'll see how that goes but uh oh dude yeah he's teaching them young man pretty soon they're gonna have their own YouTube car show dude they're gonna be like working on TRX's and modding and shit all that they're just like it's the future you create a dynasty what do you need to have a dynasty

8 inches exactly and you know they go boo and what does Bapa do boom yep my son saw a Tesla good ha ha ha ha Eight inches. Exactly. And, you know, they go, boo. And what does Bapa do? Boom. Yep. My son saw a Tesla. Good.

Ha, ha, ha, ha. Boo. Yeah. All right. Let's go to the last two clips we have here, dude. I know when we're losing wind here. We are losing. I watched that whole thing like, uh.

When we start what we're saying, boom and good, you know, we're losing our fucking or are we just getting started? Yeah. Three more hours, daddy. There should be a Rogan episode of T most dude. And we should just go like a marathon.

Let's see here. This one's called the Bapa thinks GTA footage is IRL. Posts by uncle T Y S. And for the ending here, I put these two clips together because people could douche us on TikTok and Instagram for having that mustache thing.

It's just fucking funny, dude. This is not a serious show. You don't need to fact check us like we're Rand DeSantis or Gavin Newsom. Yeah, dude. And also, anyone that's a fan of Boppa. But he also can if you want. Anyone that is a fan of Boppa is a friend of ours, right? So.

Sure. Yes. Stand up for him while you can online. Let's see here. Yeah, yeah. Good job, actually. I take it back. Is that your takeaway?

That's your takeaway, dude. This is a post that Brendan Shaw put up. It says, Ram TRX launch off highway escaping the cops. Which, by the way, the reason why I'm reading everything that's on screen, because Spotify is bussing, B. People are listening to 10 minutes of shop on spotify just a little plug right there let's see here i love shop dude everything he does dude he's stupid on every media wait dude no no no no that's why you can't just go around calling him stupid dude because he got you oh he got me oh shit he got you damn how does it feel quack quack quack i'm being a duck? Yeah. How does being a duck feel to you?

Sometimes you gotta be a duck. Can't be a hawk every day, you know what I mean? Yeah, you can. Let's see here. This one's also Uncle T.Y.S. called Part 2 of the Video Game Post. Let's go. Let's see. I trick people all the time. I'll post videos of the TRX like

flying off a bridge. Dude, when you throw something here, I was like, yo, that's crazy That's the video I sent you guys It looks real I posted that You said this is Brandon's TRX I thought it was real

I post them all the time Right, dude You think I thought that was real? Do you think I thought that was real? No, I mean, I hope not. No, no, no. I pray to God. I pray to God you didn't.

I do choose to believe that Brendan thought that was real. Okay. So in my painted narrative, it's more funny to me if Brendan thought that was a real clip. Yeah. Because it's so clearly a video game. Well, that's what I meant. I knew you wouldn't think it's real, but I thought that you would think that he would think it was a real clip. Yeah. Because it's so clearly a video game. Well, that's what I meant. I knew you wouldn't think it's real, but I thought that you would think that he would think it was real.

Right. Well, in my emotional truth, like Hasan Minhaj, my emotional truth is that he thought it was real, even though he just said it wasn't. Okay. All right. You know what I mean, Lynette? The idea that Brendan is like a prankster, that's a stretch.

Yeah. I don't know if that's true. He's like, I make stuff up all the time. I told him this lie about this. I don't know how much of that. It's hard to know what is true. Again, we're in the world of Chang's verse. Yeah.

Bop a verse. Togan verse. Mm-hmm. Define bullying, dude. Exactly, dude. These Reddit things, I don't even know. Yeah. There's people all like, there's rooms full of people with databases typing away.

Friars. Friars. There's the friars are going at the same time. It's all trying to take Brendan down. But Brendan's not going to do that, dude. No. No, dude. You know what I heard right now, dude?

The steps of a horse? Yeah. I heard you being like,ndan got me right now dude he gotcha that's a painted narrative from a lying carne asada chile oh let's see here absolutely 100 real all my dams like hey dumb ass this is a video game that's why why I post it. But wait, the new GTA 6 trailer came out. Why would you want people

to send you a message saying you're an idiot? Yeah, I mean, dude, only a thousand can do it. I'm so confused, but I still love it. In my mind, I'm like, the character of Brendan is more important than the actual Brendan. Well, I think that's it for the show.

So we're going to hop over to the Patreon and do a little quick episode. And yeah, check out Wrecking Tweedies, dude. See you later.