10 Minutes of Schaub - Brendan Schaub IS USING OZEMPIC?! | 10 Minutes of Schaub #88

Episode Date: February 6, 2024

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Stand up so I can watch T-Ball. It's you too, Mr. Logan Paul. Catch the shows and do my pies. Cause with the fans I share. With the fans I share, this is my favorite shoe. With the fans I share, this is my favorite shoe. Truck parked against the wall. Sun-dicked juice and some alcohol

Filming all over my sets To eat my food and mod my trucks Cause audio is king Cause I don't get views Audio is king Cause I don't get views Audio is king Cause I don't get views.

One take. It's time for my favorite time of the week. When you get nearby, try to speak. Release surprises today. You better actually watch 10 Minutes of Shop. Welcome back to 10 Minutes of Shop. Thanks for tuning in. Wow. Big news. We did. Thanks for tuning in. Wow.

Big news. We did another stand-up review. Yes. Okay. We did Whitney Cummings jokes. Yes. And if you want to know what we thought about that, check our Patreon out.

Yeah, real bait and switch. It's called jokes. Okay. Well, that's a hint of what we thought about it. Also, our other show, Raccoon Tweeties, has moved to Thursday. Yes. Is there anything else that you wanted to play? Please leave us some podcast reviews, dude, on T-MOS and on, what is it called?

Raccoon Tweeties. I said Brendan. No, dude, it's our show. Yeah. And then voicemail, 775-557-8667. Yeah. That's 775-557-T-MOS. We've been getting some uh voicemail 775-557-8667 yeah 775-557-TIMOS we've been getting some cool uh voicemails they're mainly gadushing shop and they make us laugh but whatever you want to do send it out we love it all right but anyways that's not why you're here you're here you're

here to watch Tim as a shop so start the timer play the chain clip all righty so we got a we got a heavy week at Chang's not a lot of clips but some long ones so let's just get right into it dude this one's called uh brendan got subpoenaed and had to go to court as witness for that car accident story where he saved the kids from a burning car posted by a handsome black man with a couple of underscores let's see oh you went to court oh i didn't tell you this remember so you remember when i saw that accident with uh those kids i helped out yes with the dad tried killing everybody yes dude i didn't know i got subpoenaed i was at the car shop two cops walk in give me a subpoena i'm like what's this for like you're a key witness in this trial coming up i was like okay and they're

like uh you gotta be here tomorrow and it was when, right, the baby girl stuff's going down. I'm like, it ain't happening, man. Pause it. Oh. Okay. Key witness in the trial. What do you think, what are you thinking as the attorney when you find out that your most important witness is Brendan Shaw? I'm thinking, please no show dates.

Please no show dates. Yeah. You want them there because you're worried about the trial will have to be moved and canceled because of all of Brendan's shows. That's actually another funny angle to think about. You're like, oh shit. You don't know who Brendan Chavez is.

You're like, shit, he's a popular comedian. He's going to have shows and we're going to have to do it. But then you look him up online and you're like, oh wait, he doesn't sell any tickets. This is actually the perfect scenario he has nothing to do he's gonna be there is this the moana thing uh yes oh man okay and also if if it was us as attorneys i would be like oh i hope he wears merch dude like is he gonna wear kibbetech or what kind of truck wait i've this is a quintessential me thing to do i still haven't looked up kibbetech i have no idea so it's a company yeah yeah he

wears kibbetech he wears you come on dude i can't believe i've been i even missed that that it's on his stuff yeah i thought it was something you do to the i thought kibbeteching something was doing into a truck there's something you do to a truck yeah well you take it to kibbe tech so that's what he meant yeah this whole time i didn't know all right well the guys that enjoy when i miss things there you go you're welcome dd let's see oh you have to otherwise we'll arrest you that's oh you're mandated yeah mandated i didn't know you had to be a witness have to so you went and had that guy there oh yeah to put on a suit go at 8 30 i don't know if you know how the judicial system works dude can you imagine hold on i'm gonna get a prop here go for it somehow

i can't imagine brendan shop knows how the judicial system works, dude. So, okay. So Schaub is at the table with the attorneys like for legal prep and they're talking to him. They're like, Schaub or Brendan, have you ever done something like that? Do you have any experience with this before? He's like, oh, he's like, he makes that Leonardo DiCaprio from Django Unchained. He's like, oh, yeah. Let me tell you about the judicial system.

He takes a sip of this fucking what a what a crazy guy I love it I'm in this is a great clip so far let's learn more

about the judicial system got there at 830 I didn't do shit to about 330 that's right and I go

I'm gonna leave and she goes you can but if we call and you miss it it could be I'm worn out for your arrest that's how they get you I go, I'm going to leave. And she goes, you can, but if we call and you miss it, it could be a worn out for your rest. That's how they get you.

I feel like he's like, I got there at 830. I didn't go to the restroom until 330. Yeah, the attorneys are going to be like, I didn't go to the restroom. And shit or throat split, they're bamping people. You might have to bamp that one. But so the attorneys are listening to him. They're like, okay, great. That's all good. Okay, but we're going to need you not to do that voice during the trial

because there no one's going to believe listen, I saw the guy. Okay, good douche. It would be awesome as a key witness. They're like, what happened with Tiger Belly? The first question they ask. Do you know what Reddit is? Objection sustained. It's just homeless cats and the jury and the judge and they're all making fun of them

overruled let's see you'll stay there in that really really what you'll do is you'll stay in that court area which is super comfy with those benches and criminals oh. Because everyone's going in and out. I've never seen more guys with tattoos on their face in my life. There's just a bunch of gangbangers in there. I watch a bunch of crime docs and murder mystery stuff. I did feel like I was on Law and Order.

Law and Order. Law. Callan knows about court. He knows how the chairs feel. Although when I did jury duty, I don't think the seats were uncomfortable. So there may be a bit of a parent, a painted narrative there.

Yeah. B. Or you might be the one painting, dude. I was bored. So I'd sit in all the trials. Yeah. So I loved it.

Oh, I, oh dude, I loved it all. Oh, wow. I even asked the lady, I'm like,

Hey, I know I'm not involved. Can I sit in there? She's like, I don't see why not. I literally, for nine hours, I've done all. Oh, wow. I even asked the lady, I'm like, hey, I know I'm not involved. Can I sit in there? She's like, I don't see why not. I literally, for nine hours, sat through all sorts of trials. Yeah. Like guilty, not guilty.

I don't know. I mean, that might be possible, but I don't know if Schaub has the attention to sit for nine hours and watch trials. You know, his mind is always, how do you do that if you have 13 podcasts? He is a renaissance man though. Let's not sleep on that. He's the guy that does a lot. He's just adding another thing to his repertoire. This answers the question of like, why are they

shooting in those locations? You know, like when he does food truck divers and they're next to bushes. It's like, oh, he's outside the law house. That's funny as fuck, dude. Because the bushes are, because they always have those outside of courthouses. All the different shows are shot outside of whatever case he's watching. He's like a court reporter.

A stenographer, if you ever heard of it. I'm the stenographer. Exciting, right? Pretty fun. I dug it. Do you know? It is nerve wracking when you get, like when it was finally my turn, when they call you up and the prosecutor and the defense start questioning you it's a little like oh yeah it's a little stressful did you uh because you gotta you gotta have your p's and q's and that guy that guy

was clearly trying to kill his family what's he saying claiming insanity or something yep are you like talk about it i don't know if i am but he was trying to act like he was insane during the thing careful about talking about yeah. Yeah, it was weird. I'll just say that was weird. The judge wasn't having it. The judge was not having it. No. Okay. He keeps talking about it. Do you know what the number one... Hawks,

cats, both of you. One thing you need to know, if you're ever in a situation where Brian Callen is telling you to be careful, you've gone too far. You do not want to find yourself there. He knows what he's talking about too, yeah. Good dude. Good dude.

All right, let's go to a haphazard clip, dude. A haphazard. Oh, really, dude? Ever heard of him? Boner alert. This one's called, he never reads the comments. Let's see here.

Thank you guys for holding down the fort when I was doing all this stuff with the baby girl. Yeah, thank you guys. And all the fans out there was doing all this stuff with the baby girl. Yeah, thank you guys. And all the fans out there, thank you. Even Reddit gave me the day off. So that's nice. Wow. Did they?

Well, yeah, the mods were kind of like, hey, let's be cool about this. Oh, okay, good, good. In the time of need and stuff like that. But, you know, they were still cooking orange chicken. Yeah, I think there was orange chicken being made. That's Netflix, yeah. Let's all be nice.

Continue. Continue. Commence with the hate. She's so big. So, all right. Well, good. You look good. I'm all right.

Everyone's like, oh, he's on Ozempic. It's stress. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What do you think? Well, they'll say that they'll take pictures uh you know like before and after and say it's ozempic kind of nah dude it's zen or a rogue dude helix yeah helix if you get a good night's rest eight hours you know like mr rogan says get enough sleep you do enough zen you never be fat yeah in your life with every fish you

buy you lose five pounds. That's true. Fish are actually good for you. Yeah. He doesn't really... Wait, you're saying just having fish? Yeah. Not eating them. Right.

Okay. Omega-3 fatty acids, dude. Just seeing a fish that knowing that if you ate it, you'd get those omega-3s. Yes. It puts it in your mindset, right? Yeah. Grind set. Grind set.

Right. it puts it in your mindset right? Yeah, grind set because like you can like you can do you can try and do what I do but you can't. Good luck but what I just said makes no sense that's like now I see a lot of people being asked that they lose

like I saw Stephen A. Smith on Bill Maher show, you know Bill Maher's show. Bill Maher made a joke about that. He lost a lot of weight. Bill Maher says, Ozempic, and he immediately was like, no, man, I work out. That's a thing now. Isn't it weird, though? The Ozempic shame, though?

I don't give a fuck. If I was on, I'm like, yeah, Ozempic, I don't eat. Actually, it might be a good point. Where are they? They're gadouching him for that. I agree with him there. Yeah. I don't know.

He's the one that brought it up to though. It wasn't like somebody asked. That's a good point. Like he's just naturally, he's kind of like a paranoid about that. He's like, listen, I'm not, I know I lost weight, but it's not that. Not I was zipping. But if I was, I'd be cool about it. All right.

And the title of this video is he never reads the comments. So who on his team is coming up to him and be like, Brennan, you really got to address this. They think you're on Ozempic. Right? She and I is like, hey, they're in the situation room. Yeah. All right, what's on the show for today?

Well, first off, we have to talk about these Ozempic allegations. Yeah. Listen, if you want the dick juice, have to talk about ozempic yeah thank god you're here to explain this to me thank god my ass i want but now it's a thing where people lose weight and they'll be like it's not ozempic it's kiwis what if dude yeah i absolutely wanted to go into kiwi but what if like you were callan and or montez instead of them and the show was just totally different because you would like help Shob understand these things whereas these

monsters that he surrounds himself with just let him gadoosh himself nonstop. There's never any back and forth. They never try and explain. They're just like he says something crazy and they're like alright. Like ooh more money. More Reddit views.

Let's see. That's going to be so bad for people in 10 years. Half of the comics are going to die. No, but I think that the problem is like- You don't want to try, Derek? There's a difference between losing weight. This is a good fat joke right there. Looking skinny.

People look weird. They do? No, no, no. When they go zero to a hundred people look weird on ozempic when they lose a lot of weight yes

because it's zero to a hundred a body of mine man what D'Elia said all the comics so all the big comics

are on ozempic I guess I don't know Tom Segura lost a lot of weight yeah but there's also Kiwis so I mean yeah you think he's also Kiwis, so.

I mean, yeah, you think he's on Kiwi. That would be so fun. Dude, if any of these fucking bigger comics come out now and they just happen to be eating a Kiwi, that's pretty funny. Homeless comfort. Put that in the Raccoon Tweedies subreddit. Yeah. They're not going to want you on that. They'll put that in Chang's.

Yeah. But we'll take it. We got a lot of posts on the subreddit about sharpies kiwis wholesome stuff you know uh but check this one out this is another haphazard right here dude it's called turns out it's just dress not the zemp so he's addressing it on all platforms dude yeah i miss these i wasn't on the i looked a little bit on the subreddit for the song but i've been off the sub this week it's like no i saw you i saw you in the in line at the supermarket and uh i was like i don't i think i i think that's my friend brennan shop yeah i like

people like oh brennan's on ozempic no no it's stress ozempic no no that's uh that's a that's a stressful time yeah i feel like hilarious The funniest thing I've ever seen. What? Dude. Wow. You mean this Adonis? Yeah. I don't think so.

Look at his thighs. This guy, I mean, he's an athlete. He had a cappuccino with the Buffalo Bills. Yeah, dude. On an Ozempic. Yeah. They don't offer Ozempic at Buffalo's training camp, dude. Dude, they wouldn't sell, a doctor wouldn't sell Ozempic to Schaub

because he would look at Schaub, they'd run the test, and he'd be like, oh my God, you're how old? Wow, these are the results of a 25-year-old Navy SEAL hawk. Let's see. Like we're not in the belly of the beast anymore uh yeah i mean yeah yeah for now you hope so for now so 2024 has kicked me right in the tits dude it's kicked you right in the tits and lost my truck listen we got to give credit where credit's due dude those are some fire ass jordans right, dude. Oh, you like them? Yeah. They're not bad. Yeah. They're not as bad as usual.

I was thinking 2024. I kind of agree. 2024 is not going to sugarcoat anything, dude. 2024, dude, is not going to put sugar on your dick and suck it. What does he say? Until it's delicious. Until you go, it's delicious? I already forgot.

What if I had delivered that well? Wow. It'd be different. It'd be different. Let's see. Baby girl issues. By the way, but hold on. The truck isn't even in the same conversation.

Oh, no. I'm just talking about bad luck. I'm just saying, who gives a fuck about your truck? Who gives a fuck about anything else when it's your kid? Oh, 100%. I'm just saying that, like, that sucks. That sucks for me, dude. That's how I kicked off the year. Oh, God, Callan.

Callan just doesn't get it. Callan tried, dude. He tried. Yeah, it's like, you know, he's the straight man, but he's also insane. Your straight man is like a dangerous person. Yeah, dude. colin was trying he's like you know it looks like you care more about your truck than your daughter and he's like yeah but the truck thing sucks i don't i mean chad doesn't want to talk about that properly i don't blame him yeah it doesn't why would you want to harp on something like that on a show oh that's a great perspective b um all right we've got

another one it's posted by busy middle 8108 it's called thief for sutherland is back let's see here amazing i know they're making themselves it's it's mainly the body but look at this if you saw this on the street you would think it's an actual ferrari that's like a supercar come on dude this one here you wouldn't? No. Because Brennan has more of an eye for it. What do you mean? I know my shit, but some things are off about this. But if I saw it, I'd be like,

yeah, that's definitely a Ferrari. You know how in the Chrysler 300s they said it looked like Rolls Royces? Yeah. Until Rolls Royce pulls up next to it. Name the comic, dude. Do you know whose joke that is? I was laughing at Royals Royce again.

But fuck, I do know that. When the Chrysler 300 pulled up next to Royals Royce. I mean, we could just pull it up right now. Who is it? You'll see. You need a Ferrari. What is it? That's what I thought.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. In your Ferrari, what is it? Grateful about your motherfucking life. You got to learn to be grateful. If God done blessed you with a Chrysler 300, be happy you got a Chrysler 300. Stop walking around talking shit. Talking about, nigga, I got it because it looked just like a Phantom. No, nigga. It looked like a Chrysler 300. The fucked up part is it do look like a phantom until a phantom pull up

then you just in that motherfucking this is bullshit i don't even want to be on this street job all you got to do is be like like cat williams says yes it's fine yeah you can quote it so the handler needs to step in and tell them that. Yeah. Even if they were at TFATK, like chin in between is like, shop's fully where it's a Cat Williams.

Like it's just a random cut to chin in the situation. Yeah. You know what I mean? It's like when you're in a truck, dude, and you're in a F-150, but then a Raptor pulls up. Yeah. Are those the same? The TRX.

I don't know, dude. Those might be the same. I have no idea what trucks are uh all right let's get another haphazard up in your dude oh man that stays my life so i'm watching haphazard i saved this narrative for the end okay obviously this is the biggest thing at chang's this week right uh retiring from comedy confirmed yeah man i don't know i don't know about that right when we bought these diet starts monday shirts hawk's to do what a hawk's got to do, but let's see what this announcement was all about.

Yeah, I had to cancel Austin and Nashville. And usually I hate doing that stuff. It happens. But yeah, I think this time I just don't care. That's where I'm at. I got to be home more. I'm going to pull back from touring so much. And I just got to be home, man. I got to. I can't care. That's where I'm at. I got to be home more. I'm going to pull back from touring so much. And I just got to be home, man.

I got to. I can't miss Tigers games. Can't miss my bossy growing up, baby girl. Just I can't do it anymore. I'm tired, man. I'm tired. I'm freaking tired. I've been hustling for over 12 years now.

Nothing to stop doing the pods. All right. So two things. I've been hustling for over 12 years now. Nothing to stop doing the pods, but. All right. So two things. One is, again, it's always so funny with serious stuff because right next to that table that has Kratom, a giant Diet Coke, pouches that you put in your mouth, a big whiskey bottle, and then two rain things.

To be serious next to that, Like, man, you know, stuff is really rough right now. Got into an accident. And then you're just next to a giant thing of whiskey and cream. Yeah. So that's funny. The other thing is like, let's put ourselves in for us.

This doesn't really matter because he is going to be in LA. So we can still see his stand up here for the tour people. It's like that. That's kind of block bus. Yeah. That is a blow, it's like that, that's kind of blockbusting. Yeah, that is a blow to the psyche. If you're in Nashville,

if you're in Atlanta, if you're in fucking Melbourne, Florida or Australia, you're not going to see Shop Live. Your chance is over, D.A.D.

Yeah. You should have went to go see him. You fucked up. Yeah, you should have already seen the gringo poppy, but I'm sorry.

I mean, one day we will. Fly out here dog yeah god dog as far as the the plane life and stuff like that i gotta i gotta chill out i can do spots in la i can do local socal thank god or cal but going international or you know going across the the freaking united states ain't happening right now i Oh, really, dude? Break from that and just focus on family and do my thing, man. Do my thing. So, yeah, let's get into it.

Enough of that. Enough of that. I saw it coming, dude, because, like, think about, like, his core values. Fish, cars, kids. Did you hear comedy in that? No. No. So it's like if you didn't know this shit,

it's because you don't watch them for 10 minutes a week like we only we only devote 10 minutes of our week to shop i think you know comedy does work in threes you know and i think it is funny that kids are not the first one that's so funny you think it'd be like a fish cars baseball or something i don't know best brains yeah dude thank you i that means a lot coming from you uh all right so this one's posted You'd think it'd be like a fish, cars, baseball or something. I don't know. Best brains. Yeah, dude. Thank you. I, that means a lot coming from you. All right. So this one's posted by the, his 08730.

It's a resignation from comedy gone, but not forgotten. And it's just a picture of shop. Never, never forgot. Yeah. Never forgotten. Let's go to the next one. That was just a picture post. It was good.

Good job. This is John Rambo Jr. It's called This is What the Thousand Think of Those That Quit Comedy. Oh, yeah. I mean, Sean's not quitting. No, no. He's still going to do Wes Covina Laugh Factory. So let's hear what these duds got to say about it. This is a long life

we got. Are we going to do this forever? I mean, you're doing whippets at 78. You know it's sadder when people stop doing it. When you run into a guy who used to do comedy, like, you don't do comedy anymore? That's really sad. Especially if they had at least one good set. Yeah.

Where you could have figured it out. Or maybe even a special or two. Yeah. And you run into guys and, like, you don't do comedy anymore? No, I'm a producer now. Or no, I'm just, like, having... What do you think, dude?

Well, it'd be cool to see them run into Schaub and talk to him. Yeah. You know, like about once he stops doing it. Hey, Brandon. Wow. What are you up to? You know, doing Toontown, Truck Walk Diaries, fucking. Stay there, Brian.

Stay there. No. What? Yeah. fucking stand up right stand up no yeah I mean I gotta focus on like Suns games and like you know my boss D is that a new joke you're working on for stand up no Mark I'm like it's just different now I'm not doing it anymore yeah that's how

Mark would go we'll do one every week next week will be Ari Shaffir yeah I like how uh it's hard for you to do mark because he's just another white guy talking mark norman yeah i feel like it's easy i'll go what oh you're saying good dude good dude all right we got one from pharrell 80s here it's called real weird to see him finish a pod and not promote some comedy show that would inevitably be rescheduled guessing which show would be canceled and why was my fave part of the bop of hers let's see here great title never read uh yeah that's it happy monday january 29th

thank you guys for tuning in like subscribe do all your thing got a bunch of dope toontown uh content coming out thank god TRX fiasco. The lightning's finally going to be done. I got a photo shoot for Street Truck Magazine on Friday. The Dean's getting done by Borla. We got a lot going on in Toontown. If I were in Raleigh, North Carolina right now, I'd be fucking pretty mad, dude.

I'd be like, this is a blog bust. You know? Yep. The country or the state? The state. Oh, okay. You. I'd be like, this is a blog bust. Yeah. You know? Yep. The country or the state? The state. Oh, okay. You gotcha, gotcha. Now, yeah, I mean, listen, dude. When you got as many shows as he does, like, the last thing you need is what?

More shows, dude, right? I mean, that's just straight talk wireless, dude. We all know that. Yeah, dude. I mean, he can easily sell out Madison Square Garden. Mm-hmm. Yeah, dude. And that's when you know like when shoves really fucked up like if he if he said madison rectangle garden or something like

that yeah that's a triangle garden you know what's a real realistic hope for us what is that he would probably say square but um dog square don't tell comedy dude what if they release a brendan chav fucking episode of don't tell dude if they did a? If they release a Brendan Chobb fucking episode of Don't Tell Comedy. Clip, dude. Dude. If they did a clip, they would never, but that would be amazing. Tag Don't Tell Comedy, say get Brendan Chobb on here, dude. That would be good for them.

I mean, they don't need it because they're so big already, but they would get a lot of run out of that if they just did a Chobb clip. Yeah. Or a 12-minute set. He's got 25 at all times. That's true. He does have a lot of material. But let's get him on Don't Tell Comedy.

He deserves it. They're SoCal local. He's not even going to be on Stone Temple Pilot, Deedee. All right, this one's another haphazard. It's called Comedy Retirement Endgame. So this is where the fucking woke meets the wall, dude. Oh, nice. They address the haters, B.

Let's see. Uh-oh. That's the that's where it's all happening and you and i are gonna be at the last i'm new soon okay you'll have some what we'll have news soon okay well yes i'm at the vulcan this friday saturday but fire the kid live might be back there very shortly very short maybe do a residency out there in austin aren't we i'd like to do a residency residency let's see out there in austin i think that would be a great thing for us and i think it'd be a lot in Austin, aren't we? I'd like to do a residency. Residency.

Let's see here. Out there in Austin. I think that would be a great thing for us and I think it'd be a lot of fun and I think there's a lot of energy. We have some big guests lined up. Yep.

We'll have some news soon. So let's see. Did you talk to our boy about that? Which one? Oh, yes. Yep. Yep. We're good, baby.

And I'm in Nashville next Thursday. Two shows, one night only at Zany's in Nashville. Then I'm at the Stepmothership Vulcan Friday, Saturday. Austin, come on out next Friday, Saturday. Can you do that with your jitters? Can you do that with your jitters?

You guys going to piss together? You guys going to piss together? Yes, I do, Joe. Okay, okay. Tell me what's up. Yeah, I had to cancel Austin in Nashville. And usually I hate doing that stuff. It happens.

But, yeah, I think this time I just don't care. That's where I'm at. I got to be home more. I'm going to pull back from touring so much. And I just got to be home, man. I got to. I can't miss Tigers games. Can't miss my bossy growing up. I'm going to pull back from touring so much, and I just got to be home, man. I got to. I can't miss Tigers games.

Can't miss my boss D growing up, baby girl. Just I can't do it anymore. I'm tired, man. I'm tired. Re-eat. I've been hustling for over 12 years now. He's tired. Not that I stopped doing the pods, but as far as the plane life and stuff like that, I got to chill out.

I can do spots in LA. I can do local. He can put food in a car, you know, in a trunk. Going international. It's like the pods, easy. Easy setup, dude. Yeah. So I'm going to take a break from that.

You want him to go to Ireland and do stand-up, dude? I'll do my thing, man. What about freaking all the stuff he's got to do here, dude? Oh, jeez. What the fuck? Juice is worth a squeeze. Juice is worth a squeeze. Thank him.

Yeah. Thank him, Bobby. Yeah, so apparently they went on Fighter and the Kid live. thank them. Yeah. Thank him, Bobby. Um, yeah. So apparently they went on a fighter and the kid live and they were like, Oh, you guys thought we quit comedy. How dare you? Yeah. I think I saw a little bit of that.

Yeah. They were doing bits. Jesus Christ. Yeah. But better than numbers talk, I guess. Yeah. So that's basically the long and short of it.

Do you have any final thoughts on him quitting comedy? I mean, I hope he's still going to do it. He's hilarious. Yeah. So that's basically the long and short of it. Do you have any final thoughts on him quitting comedy? I mean, I hope he's still going to do it. He's hilarious. Yeah. As I've said many times, you're probably like, again, broken record. Oh, really, dude? But I want to see another Gringo Poppy. Yeah.

Don't we all? He can get millions of views. Keep in mind, too, last week was the day that we recorded when he dropped that information yeah and me and you had a little bit of a panic attack dude oh yeah somebody put in the discord uh gringo poppy 2 will never happen and it fucking it drove us into madness i don't see that as a possibility i will do something i've never been more serious about anything in my life. To keep us busy? This is important. Oh, I'm past keeping you busy. This is different. This means a lot to me. My

North Star is now the possibility of another special. Yeah. So I will do whatever I can. I will bet on Brendan. I'll bet on myself. I'll bet on you. I'll bet on the Cats. I'll bet on the Hawks. Okay? This is not a sad thing. No. It's not over. Yeah.

All right. Michael, like I said on some of the comments, Michael Jordan played baseball for like a season and he came back and won three championships. Michael Jordan. You're right. So you're saying that Shaw is basically in his flu game right now. I mean, every time Shaw does stand up, he performs at that level.

There's levels to this shit. Oh, shit. Andrew Sch this shit. Oh, shit. Andrew Schultz. Oh, yeah. Bruh. You think it's over, bruh? Man, it just began, bruh. You didn't even know, bruh.

Well, I will say amongst the hawks in the chat, bruh. Brennan Schaub is an industry, bruh. Yeah. When you think he's gone, he's just around the corner, bro. Yeah. He was born in a cringe. You merely adopted that shit, Jared. Jared.

Yeah, so the hawks in the chat love your Andrew Scholl, so I thought it fitting to have an Andrew Scholl's clip today. Oh, man, good timing. Let's see. This one's posted by Shankmaster8000. It's called lil dicky addresses theo vaughn accusing him of stealing his jokes right let's see here there was that stuff with theo vaughn he was upset like how do you deal with how do you deal with something

immediately i lose respect for people when they do this show like i love the first season of dave and i think i like the second season too but i remember watching like the next season and being like yeah and even some of the second season i was like okay i think he's falling off he's he's heading into this territory where you know he's starting to get the yes men everybody telling him he's a genius a murderer nothing he can do wrong. And so he's insulated himself to the point where now he's not getting it anymore. And he's on Schultz and he's doing episodes that are woke. Yeah.

And it's going to meet the wall soon for him. So we'll see. Also, I want to give people a little insight into what I do. Whenever somebody asks me what my top five rappers are, say four rappers that are repeatable, right? Biggieac kendrick kanye right for always for the fifth rapper and i go and little dicky it's so funny because i i truly hated on him when he first started before the show i my i like barely knew who he was and my roommate at the time was like oh did you hear this guy little dicky oh you to hear this rap.

So he started playing Lil Dicky for me. And I looked at my roommate and I said, and I walked out of the room. I acted like I was angry. But the show was so good. I was like, I'm wrong again. I've been wrong. But I'm seeing a little bit of a decline when it comes to my tastes. And naturally, once you put him in the top five,

people are going to have questions. All you have to say is one word, dude. Be like, bars. It throws people into a mental spiral if you put Lil Dicky in your top five. When Vincent Luis asked me once who my favorite, my top five favorite rappers were, I was like Eminem, Yellow Wolf, Vanilla. I just said all white people, Lil Dicky. And they were like, all right, Vanilla all white people Lil Dicky and they were like alright

let's see but I mean Schultz his presence is just so powerful you know right when he starts I'm like oh I don't want to watch this you know there was that stuff with Theo

Vaughn he was upset like how do you deal with how do you deal with something like that I'm happy that you brought that up so I have never stolen any jokes whatsoever. But how do you handle that? Well, that particular instance, I think to myself,

well, I don't understand why he would think that I haven't stolen. I don't know if you guys are aware of the context of it. I only recently am aware because I saw a comment that said... It was just on the internet. Yeah. I think he was doing like a barstool show and you guys both had a similar idea in the show.

Right? Yeah. He had it in some... Two things. One is, I give Schultz props here. I like that he always is willing to ask these questions. Like he asked him about stealing. You think I'm going to get douche him? I'm not, no. He asked him about stealing. Cool. And then he also asked shop up at the truck walk

hey shop real quick though tell me hey what's up with this shit I hear about you doing like truck walks and shit

bruh be honest period T but I like that he at least asked these questions a lot of people are too scared to you know

find us a big celebrity and bring it up because I think they'll just walk away the other thing is like Lil Dicky, he's going to say like, because I watched his clip, he's going to be like, I mean, I didn't steal it. And I remember in the writer's room,

okay, did you come up with it or did your writers come up with it? Because the writers could have stolen it. Are we not, these are like common, how long have you been doing this? Did you just start, hi, my name is Brandon. But did you just start today? How do you not know that the writer could have stolen it?

Yeah. It's just, it's a fishy. Yeah. Yeah. Well, let's see what happens. I don't know. I can care less, honestly. It doesn't matter.

It's not a throwaway. But I mean, I don't respect Schultz. Yeah. Thing in the art. And then you had a podcast. He said on a podcast. About the wooden shirt. You know why, dude?

Because I'm going to YouTube comment you really quick dude sure fucking people always accuse these guys of having the list off screen of what they're going to talk about oh yeah well i want to promise you guys when you come to timos or raccoon tweeties we're not reading off of a what does it say off a whiteboard you know what i I mean, the list is right there in that fucking guy's laptop. Exactly. Dude. The whatever. Yeah.

Mark Gagnon. The hockey guy. Yeah. But yeah, that's, I don't know. The narrative is pretty funny to me. Like you'll go to like a two bears,

one cave. I watched one of the latest episodes and people want to act like it's all orchestrated. It's like, it's kind of hard to do that. You know? Yeah. I feel like it's very hard to blur the lines of an orchestration but i do believe that they little dickie knew that he's gonna bring this up it's not like oh i'm dumb he's like journalist but even coming on the show

like schultz asked him probably then if he could do it most people don't do that it seems like yeah i don't know and they also do it with like feigning interest in a sense where they're just like you know people are talking about the... They don't give a fuck. I just like that we can see their socks. That's all I really want. The wooden shirt that you guys had in the show. I remember when we came up with the wooden stuff in the writer's room,

and it was totally built on a different idea that was about a man whose entire house was made of wood, down to the clothing. And then we ended up not going with that storyline. Ended up doing one small, really inconsequential scene of my series where a guy was just selling wooden shirts. I promise you it wasn't, I've never, and whenever I see

content of Theo Vons online as I'm scrolling, I totally think it's funny and I respect it. I've got no animosity, I've just never met him. We have so many mutual friends. I always was under the understanding that accusing a comedian of stealing jokes is like a major taboo. It's the biggest, yeah. It's a big, big deal.

I was like, just reach out to me, and I have nothing but respect from what I see of his content online, but I never have stolen any joke. That's really my immediate reaction. I'm not hurt by it. I'm just like, why would he be so insistent when I never would?

Right, right. Two people can't have the same idea. It's a pretty broad idea. Like the idea of wooden clothing. Yeah. Yeah. I feel like Shoals needs to go back to his core values. Oh yeah. I haven't heard a bruh. Yeah. Where he stopped doing it because we, I haven't heard a son. We don't matter. We don't care. But that would be so funny if we're making it different a different cast bro Theo Vaughn said you stole jokes son nah nah nah

and then I was like cut that cut that yeah yeah yeah they all I was blacked out bro yeah oh so the shirt made of wood

is that funny is that funny or that not funny so tell me like for real though like so you made Theo was saying that you had this wood shit

and your shit but he also had that shit and his shit but what I'm saying is like, why aren't y'all making TikToks, bro? Your show is on Hulu, but bro, cut that shit up, bro.

Like fucking lines, bro. Lines, bro. And then sniff out every, like sniff the line like a clip. One, two, three, four, five. Boom. Five, six. Six, seven.

Let's see. I don't know. I'm sure's see. I don't know. I'm sure they're in. I don't know. I mean, this is the way you just said it. We're all just so hilarious all the time. We talking about stealing jokes. Ash Cash, man.

Fucking, what are you doing crossing your legs and arms and not laughing? We're only killing in here. Yo, your chair look like it want to get hit. Off they cut. For a second, He's like, Ashkash, please. When we're all laughing, even if you don't think it's funny, you must laugh with us. His real voice is Patrick Bateman.

Every day I wake up and I work out 100 sit-ups a day, 500 push-ups. The most important thing is that I use black slang whenever I can. Let's see. It's not men and women are different. They're one-dimensional.

Yeah. But, yeah. Have you guys spoken at all? Why don't you guys just talk? Because I think a lot of times what would happen in these situations is, you know, both sides explain their part and then you go oh okay

I see why this you know these two different comedians came to this conclusion and it wasn't somebody that's trying to bite I'm definitely down to try I take it back dude Andrew Schultz is king dude yeah he's best brains for the arts people should talk more dude

that's true I mean mean he's he solves problems yeah he's on there he he fixed the trug walk thing now he's trying to repair the relationship between theo and a little dicky little dicky could do still a little bit there he's like i was thinking that you know saying someone stole a joke is the worst thing that could happen but i guess he's doing that so i'll let you decide what that means i like to imagine every time andrew's about to record an episode he's walking down a hallway and there's so many people handing him clipboards he's like yeah they just need to talk it out they just need to talk it out okay yeah he has so many friends you know he's friends with everybody which doesn't look good for hollywood right

let's see beef with him whatsoever i don't like when if I post something and I see stop stealing Theo's jokes I'd never have done that I think there's only one joke in question your writers did you come on man I don't know if it's still in it I don't know what the joke is

maybe it's parallel thinking but come on man I've said enough So like maybe it's parallel thinking, but come on, man. He's not saying, all right, I've said enough. You know what I mean? I don't even know what other jokes we're even questioning. In three seasons of television. Right.

Yeah. Like you're talking about the Amy Schumer thing, right? How the writer probably stole the joke. Oh, I have no idea. Right. About Amy Schumer, but. Well, that was like the controversy about that is that she would steal jokes from like

Key and Peele sketch or like, what is it called? Who's that black fat guy? Patrice O'Neill. Oh, like those kind of things. The street joke things. Yeah. That was funny. Sorry, I had to fix the computer really quick.

Big Dick, sorry about that. Big Dick, sorry about that. I accidentally gadooshed the clip here. Let's see. Sorry, we're back. It's all good. Yeah, that's Big Dick's sorry about that. I accidentally gadooshed the clip here. Let's see. Sorry, we're back. It's all good. Yeah, that's the thing. I think like now with the internet,

there are so many more people putting things out that the possibility of two people having a similar idea is infinitely higher than back in the day. This is your real voice. What are you doing? This is what I'm talking about, dude. Yeah. he's fucking up man i don't know what he's got to do to remind himself i think maybe he got that haircut just to remind himself you know like stay in the voice yes use the voice he touches where are they fucking doing

where there would be 10 comedy specials a year and you just need to cross over in those 10 now you have a million pieces of content that are out there in the world and you're going to see

people with similar ideas you see it happen with memes you see it happen with you know written pieces you see all these types of things so I don't think it like immediately means

that one person is stealing from another all I know is that my soul feels very pure and clean. I just think you guys are both great, and I would love you guys to both just be like, hey. Set it up. You're friends with everybody.

I will set that up. I will set that up. I will set that up. Let's go. On the beach in Positano. Yeah. That feels equivalent. You know what I mean? I mean.

How far are we from getting flagrant chairs, dude? I mean, I'm pretty addicted to these ones because they're so ridiculous. But someday, if we have lots of money, we'll do every podcast. I mean, let's be honest. That question was ridiculous, dude. We're never getting rid of these chairs, dude. No. You're right.

You're right. These chairs are fucking, are North Star beat. Boom. Alright, so this is the last one for the day. It's a nice little funny, little microwavable dish, if you will. Nice. Cool. Good. An appetizer? Yeah. At the end, dude. Mod sticks?

Yeah, dude. This one's posted by NarXPunk. Ever heard of it? It's called, you heard about this killer tape going around. And if it gets gadooshed, we apologize because it is a video thing, but let's see. What do you think it is? Ha ha ha.

Oh yeah. What's up, Dallas? Look at you guys. I'm not used to this. Dallas is a little different. There's some ladies in the crowd tonight. If it kills you right away, then people in Australia are already dead.

Yeah, dude. Seven days. My demo, 18 to 36 bros. That's what I specialize in. It's a real cock fest usually at these things. I don't mind it though. I'm the bro whisperer. That's what they call me. Can we vaccinate him?

I'm married to Mexican, y'all. I'm married to Mexican. I thought you would like that. Listen, listen, listen. I thought you guys would enjoy that. Listen, Dallas, Dallas.

I don't mean like Taco Bell, Mexican. I'm talking Guadalajara. Born and raised. Came to the States 10 years ago. Illegally Mexican. No, no, no. I'm talking Guadalajara. Born and raised. Came to the States ten years ago. Illegally Mexican. The real deal, Holyfield. Y'all, this shit is... I dated

a lot of white girls, big titties and flat asses before her. It just never worked out for me. It just would never work out. And I don't forget this one. One of my boys goes, dude, dude, papi, what are you doing, bro? Get with a Latina, bro. You know why? Because they're fun and they're spicy. Yeah, XJ Hotline.

XJ Hotline. Hello, you're dying seven days. Boner alert. That's a boner alert. I seem really upset, obviously. I'm hurt, man. If you wanted to hurt me, you got upset, obviously. I'm hurt, man. If you wanted to hurt me, you got me, brother. Well done.

Yes. Yeah. Very good, dude. Come miss the chef. Those high frequencies were affecting my ears. I like it when it would cut and go to the screen, like the, what is it? Static screen. Yeah.

Pretty good. Great stuff, guys. Thank you guys at Chang so much, dude. Shout out to Chang. Shout out to Naomi Watts. Shout out to everybody watching. Join us on our Reddit. Reddit, Discord, Patreon. We'll see you at any of those platforms.

B. I put the Reddit link in the description of the video. Uh-oh. Yeah. All right. See you next week. Bye.