10 Minutes of Schaub - Dane Cook takes a trip to PF CHANGS! | 10 Minutes of Schaub #20

Episode Date: January 16, 2023

Twentieth episode of 10 Minutes of Schaub

B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B- Welcome back to 10 Minutes of Shop. Thank you for tuning in. I hope you enjoyed that intro song. That's a new one to Stacy's mom. Total freaking donk. We just did a poker episode on the actual podcast, so that's why the donk came out a little bit check it out check it out yeah join the discord no pressure you know but that's not why you're here no you're here for 10 minutes of shop so start the clip now all right so this uh clip is called swinging a miss papa all right Here we go. Dude was a savage.

Yeah, dude. You didn't know that either, huh, Mark? Murder. Yeah, beast. Rogers, the host of an internationally acclaimed TV show for children, Mr. Rogers,

served as a Navy SEAL Marine Scout sniper during the Vietnam War. Ever heard of it? With a large number of confirmed kills. You have to state it false mr rogers never certain nah dude

oh my god i don't even know where to start again that's uh the the vietnam ward that was that was a good one and then ever heard of it like it's a cool thing yeah remember how cool that ever heard of it like oh man and then of course

Mr. Rogers didn't do any of that like it's a credit in Hollywood yeah Mr. Rogers I don't think killed anybody yeah I think that was a big part

of his personality was that he was he was the nicest person look to the helpers I think was his quote it wasn't like you know in the denang and down in the jungle i had these puppets were all i had the napalm was crazy this burn is what i got there now all right geez papa you're losing it yeah uh all right so this one's called bgl interrupting dan cook with shush sounds great addition to the

team brenda there's a lot of dang cook clips this week all right one one last thing though it's like This one's called BGL interrupting Dan Cook with shush sounds. Great addition to the team, Brenda. There's a lot of Dan Cook clips this week. All right. One last thing, though. It's like Mr. Rogers is in the Vietnam War. Oh, really, dude? There's no trains in Vietnam. All right.

Oops. Oops. That store, because the store was still open in some places where we were filming the employee of the month scenes and others. Was it an actual Costco. Yeah. Yeah. So they, they, they, the police were involved for the rest of the shoot for the, for the, for the next, for the next week.

What was that? It police were involved. Was that a, Oh, I thought you were shushing me. I'm trying not to laugh. Oh shoot. Oh, that was, that was one of the most interesting laughs I've ever heard. Maybe the people laugh do you think that um employee of the month is like one of shop's favorite movies maybe he's like he's like dude when they're chilling in the rafters at costco

it's fucking dope dude it's gay this looks like a fight between that's brewing between dane cook and bgl yeah that would be interesting well dane cook strikes me as somebody that likes to fight people dude maybe he definitely seems to have a temper i've seen him on stage like get really Dane Cook and BGL maybe. That would be interesting. Well, Dane Cook strikes me as somebody that likes to fight people, dude. Maybe. He definitely seems to have a temper. I've seen him on stage get really angry at the crowd. Yeah. I would like to see Dane Cook beat up BGL. I think I side with Cook on that one.

I want to see Dane Cook on Tweety's, dude. But I also don't know violence. No violence. I don't support violence. People take me seriously on these things. Alright, so this one's called Someone Finally Said It and Someone's Reading Comments. I don't know what that means. Comments.

Thanks for watching, liking, subscribing. And then you can head on over to our Patreon. We're running now, baby. You're talking about the Patreon? Well, yeah, you're cutting me off. So it's highly annoying. Well, I thought you were going to talk about Adam Ray's wedding. No, no, no. Adam Ray's wedding Patreon be on adam ray's wedding no no adam ray's wedding patreon people that's in the comments brandon's cutting people off it's okay it's one

of his things it's what i do it's what he does what i don't understand what just happened i guess they're just saying that on the king and is that wait that's not the king of this thing yeah that's the king that's the king so in the king of this thing shab is cutting off you know people all want to hear what deliaElia has to say, and Schaub is cutting in on Griffin. But that clip was so bad. Yeah. Oh, really, dude?

Oh, really, dude? Okay, so this one's called, another Dan Cook one, it's called Dumbest and Longest Question in T-Fat K History. That is true. Right? And do you feel like when you and I were talking at the right and do you feel like when i when you and i were talking at the improv do you feel like the younger generation and i i figured you knew it was going to come but the appreciation like the respect you have is like now you're an og like

because you were like a pioneer right the myspace and your marketing i'm influenced by it schultz is influenced by it everybody is kevin and you were the first one to do it. And do you feel the reason? Because anybody I talk to, especially if they have a marking mind, everyone mentions Dan Cook. Dan Cook. Do you feel that respect? I think that is true. What an insulting question.

Everyone hates you. Well, I mean, Dan Cook probably thinks he's a great comic you know and i mean i laugh when some of his old stuff and this question is like you're like the greatest marketer ever right and like you're very good at merch and that's all that shop cares about and he asked thing i'm surprised i wonder if cook did cook respond in this clip at all or not just not in the clip baby yeah yeah i bet he was pissed off he's like well i mean uh what how do you even answer that yeah i guess i'm a soulless marketer and i'm the best at it thanks job yeah i was really lonely started in myspace got really big off it wait so i

as dan cook's like wait i inspired you and andrew schultz like close his head off right there So this one's called Where Tom Logistics Be I think that's what it says I'm thinking we're talking about logistics Where if you there's this urban legend of a guy Taking acid and he thought

That he was a big juicy orange and peeled his skin Off and died As you get older you think about just the logistics Of that Seems not realistic But I've never done acid So I'm going to stay away from it As you get older, you think about just the logistics of that. Not realistic, but I've never done acid, so I'm going to stay away from it. Dude, there's something endearing about shop, dude. Well, the malaprop is, or I don't even know if that's the word,

but it's like when he messes up words, it's always funny. Yeah. His brain, he gets a little bit of it. You know what he's trying to say but he doesn't say it right and then it's also such a stupid of course someone didn't do that you know and his idea of like when you get older it's not like you know 18 20 it's like 36 like you figure you get the impression that he figured this out last week seems not realistic i've never done acid just the logistics of that logistics seem about just the logistics of that you're like it seems not realistic he's thinking yeah he's really thinking away from it probably didn't figure it out himself so he was probably

telling that story to somebody like delia and they were like dude that didn't happen or like maybe he was telling it he was telling the story to his kids to scare them into either not doing ass or wearing crocs and then they were like dad that probably didn't really happen he's like oh you're right dude and then he's saying he says his own point yeah classic shot this was the one i'm most excited for it's called dame calls out brendan Interrupting, Then Brendan Blames Callan. That's a beefy clip right here. Dicey, dicey over here. What was this shot in Dallas?

Sounds like this one is a first, second, and third act. Wait, I don't want to touch your moments. Boundaries, man. That was like a big, big, that was a game changer for me. Like, oh, now you know what happened? I was such a, I was such a... Can I have my own thoughts? Can I find it myself?

How about not filling King's head? Because we're going to have to edit his Tom Cruise story out because it's seven hours. Wait, I don't want to touch... I mean, Dane Cook was kind of funny there. Can I have my own thoughts? That made me laugh. You don't like Dane Cook? No, I don't dislike Dane Cook. I mean, I don't know have my own thoughts? That made me laugh. Yeah. That was good. You don't like Dane Cook?

No, I don't dislike Dane Cook. I mean, I don't know. He, like, everyone hates him now or whatever, but whatever. I'll tell you what, the comments are going to like you. The comments. The comments. I didn't get the part. So he blamed, he said Callan did a long story about Tom Cruise?

Yeah. Hmm. Yeah. Okay. I guess because he's saying saying because he didn't cut off Callan's Tom Cruise story we have to cut it out we have to cut off

Dane Cook's thing okay no no no they had to cut off the Tom Cruise story because it wasn't interesting so Brendan's trying to make Dane's thing interesting

so they don't have to cut it out implicating that the Tom Cruise thing wasn't we're going to have to edit all of that out okay this one's called Brendan has to be center of attention

or talking at all times. Doesn't let Callan finish. Tom Cruise story, dude. Here we go. Okay, nice. We get to see what closure here. And now everyone can see that you want everything cut out whenever I talk. So there we go. We spoke about wrestling. We spoke about everything but action.

Jesus Christ, this is a long Tom Cruise story. And I remember going, I know, but I remember going, Jesus Christ. It just all started with him going, you ever met Tom Cruise? And I remember going, I know, but I remember going, fuck. Jesus. This all started with him going, you ever met Tom Cruise? But that was, that was my Tom Cruise. That was my Tom Cruise experience.

He's like, Brian was like, did you say Tom Cruise? Chan, get ready for a 45 minute monologue on Tom Cruise. 45 minutes on Tom Cruise. But I thought,

I was like, maybe we'll be friends after this. You never heard from him. Heard from him? You didn't convert? He got into an edgy about that. He spoke about arresting Do you think that... I keep editing. I guess he went on a long rant about Tom Cruise or something. Do you think that BGL has control when he shows up on screen?

He pushes it and he's like... I mean, if he did, he'd probably only be on screen. His whole thing is like, he's obsessed with himself or whatever. There's something about him that's just very unlikable. Really? Well, there's something about him that's very interesting also. I don't think so.

I disagree. Agree to disagree, dude. What do you think is interesting about him? He's a weird fucking looking man, dude. Yeah, I guess. He is weird looking. Talk about logistics. Okay.

Let's go back to the clip. That's the end of that one, dude. Oh, that's it? Yeah. What was the whole point? That clip sucked ass. Yeah. All right.

Well, let's keep looking for clips. It's Brendan Chobb clips, dude. That's true. That's true. So this one's called Dark Brenda has no doubt it was the same video he watched when he was 16. So Dark Brenda, is that a character we don't know? I think it's like dark Biden. It's probably like conservative or I don't,

or like, I don't even know. Let's see. I saw something once and I'm not, I won't say it. Oh, please do it. No,

come on. I'm dark. Dude. It was like, yeah, but like the real hardcore, like where you're like, how did this even get on the internet,

man? This is fun. It was just crazy. It was, huh? What was it? It was a beheading. Oh, I don't know. Oh, I, I, I, I watched the internet, man. This is funny. It was just crazy. It was, huh? What was it? It was a beheading. Oh, I don't know.

Oh, I watched the Daniel Pearl one. And not an instant one. Oh my gosh. I think I've seen it. They have the dual knives. I've seen it. We're going in that direction. Yeah.

I was 16. I saw it. Now I'm seeing it. I couldn't eat for two days. Cause you hear the guy going. Oh God. seeing it i couldn't eat for two days because you hear the guy going oh yeah i couldn't hear what he was saying because of his speech impediment but then the end when he does the um the sound effect is just like so insensitive yeah a classic show he brings it home every time yeah dude uh okay so this one's called Sweet Nectar B.

I'm assuming it's... We all fucking suffer from mental illness. Bro, you don't suffer from mental illness? I don't. You never went through depression. You never contemplated suicide. Never. Oh, fuck. Maybe he's a fucking sociopath, dude.

Maybe. Nobody in this fucking... Let's take another little break from chatting and shoving food in our mouth with Sean Strickland. Kids, I know you've heard about it by now. That Tiger Thick Sweet Nectar award winning. We're winning all sorts of awards. You see it online. You see it all over.

They're talking about suicide and then it goes to him in a Pharrell hat trying to sell a shitty whiskey that's $100. That's sweet nectar. Why does he think anyone's going to buy it if he keeps saying that? Who calls whiskey sweet nectar. Why does he think anyone's going to buy it if he keeps saying that? Yeah. Who calls whiskey sweet nectar? It's like that thing that you hear when it's like, that's my nectar. And he's like, whoa, I never thought of liquids that way. I wish he had done the mask thing where he's like, we're welcome back.

We're back, blah, blah, blah. Yeah. All right, let's see. What else? So you want whiskey? Is this placement edited by Changs? Well, you probably don't know. Is it edited by Changs or is this just part of his food thing where he doesn't add?

I'm pretty sure this is edited by Changs. Okay. Well, let's keep playing. All right. Here it goes. People are like, how can I get it? What are we doing here? Oh, my God.

What are we going to do? Well, guess what? We just restocked, Daddy. That's right. If you go to thickboy.com right now and click on Tiger Thick, you will see the sweet nectar is in stock and available to be shipped straight to your door. Go to thickboy.com, click on Tiger Thick, and it will be shipped to your door. That sweet, sweet, award-winning nectar.

Get on it. This episode of Food Truck Dives with Sean Strickland is also brought to you by the best Kratom. That clip, seemed like pretty sad I think that's why they cut it together because he's saying like nope never been depressed and then it's him being like he couldn't even sell it he's like he's like this is my last one of the day

I'm just gonna I'm surprised he's usually so amped for that shit he must have done a lot of podcasts that day or maybe read some of the comments. Or he watched a 10-minute of the Shob clip right before, and he's like, that fucking asshole. Those two jerks.

He walked too many people to their trugs. Too many truck walks. He got denied a bunch of times. And he's still, what is hippie? Man. All right, let's keep going. Happy hippo. Planet Earth.

That's right, baby. Kratom. Now, a lot of you guys are like, man, I'm thinking about trying it. I don't know. It's kind of the Wild West out there. It's like CBD about six years ago, and now CBD is everywhere, and you can trust some companies. Well, guess what?

Trust your thick friend here. I take this Kratom because it's the only Kratom I trust. Those other brands, I'm not sure. Can't vouch for them. But the one I can vouch for that I use on every single show that you watch me on and if you come to my stand-up shows, every single time, I'm using Happy

Hippo Kratom. That's right. It's the only brand I trust. I take the pink lemonade shot three to four times a day. Some say I have a bra. All good. I enjoy it. Helps me speak. I need all the help I can get. If you want to use the best focus product I've ever used, and guess what? It's all natural.

That's right. It's all natural. No gimmicks. We got you covered. This can't be true. Go to happyhippoherbals.com. Use promo code sickboy for 20% off for life. He drinks all the sweet nectar, and then he takes three to four Kratom shots and alpha brain but why this is

the effect why why do you think he's telling the truth i guess it might be lying but that would make sense this is why he's like this yeah and he looks all tired and shit this doesn't make me want to buy a happy hippo nothing yeah alpha brain or alpha brain or any of that stuff it seems like he's i don't know what kratom does. It's what, I guess it helps you focus, he said. I feel like Brandon Shaw is the only way to get you sober, dude.

Oh yeah, I see the effects on Shaw and I'm like, I'm done. I don't know. That's crazy. All right, let's hear,

yeah, finish it off. Let's hear him. Can you share that with your aunt, your freaking gay sister, whoever it is, mom, dad, grandma, grandpa.

Oh really, dude? Oh really, dude? Oh, really, dude? Why is your sister gay all of a sudden? Can you share it with your straight sister and your aunt? The women in your life need kratom. That's what Shab says. Kratom, it cures gayness, basically. Yeah, well, you tell, oh, is that what he's saying?

Of course, someone's gay. That's what Shab world, but imagine you talk to Shab. You're like, man, my sister's really going through something right now. And he's like, well, fill her up with kratom and your gay aunt, too. My aunt's not gay, Shab. Well, then she's not funny. Your gay sister? I've never heard anyone refer to the lesbian sister as their gay sister.

Yeah, all right. He's losing it. Yeah, he is. But friends, nephews,hews cousins your myspace top five friends if you're still doing that stuff your grinder profile your tinder profile whatever you want use promo code sick boy for 20% off for life all you gotta do is go to happy hippo herbals.com use promo code sick boy 20% off for life use as many times as you want you're welcome i gotta say i'm not a really big fan of his choice of hat.

Yeah, that's a pretty wild hat. I don't know. I mean, for a guy that criticizes the shoe wear of his children, to wear a hat like that is a pretty ballsy move. Your MySpace top five. Top five. MySpace top five. What are you talking about, Chob?

All right, we have one more clip. It's called Brendan Chob, the geographer. You ready for this? Yes. That sounds great? All right, we have one more clip. It's called Brennan Chob, the geographer. You ready for this? Yes. That sounds great. All right, let's see here. I don't know that

Kim Ibutombo is straight from Africa. No, no, I know, but I don't think he's from Nigeria. No,

he's from Africa. Dikembe? Mutombo? What do you think he is? Japanese? No, but is he from Nigeria? No,

he's not. He's from Africa. I know you, I can tell you this. I know he's not. He's from Africa. I know you. I can tell you this. I know you've never been to Staten Island. I know you've never been to Staten Island. I'm going to Rhode Island soon. Listen to me.

Look at me right here. In season two, we went to Europe, Africa, and... Damn, you went to Africa? Well, just for one location. God damn it. What was I going to say? We were in Morocco. Jesus Christ, dude.

People say Africa like it's a country. I do it too all the time. Africa is a country. Yeah, but it's like I'm American. I know fucking Denver. The state itself was involved. Not the state, the country. The country of Russia.

Geographers, Brennan Schaub. Russia State. You see that at the end brennan shop modern day geographer and then he's got his his ridiculous hat on in there yeah dude that's so i've been to rhoda the shop is fascinated by the idea that somebody could go to africa beyond the fact that he thinks it's a country and nigeria is not there yeah um he doesn't thinks it's a country and Nigeria is not there. Yeah. He doesn't know it's a continent, which is great. I want to ask Shab, be like, what are the seven continents, Shab? Just to see what he's been. Well, there's Jorogistan, Big Whiskey Squadland, Thick Boy Squad.

Well, that was 10 Minutes of Shab. Thanks for tuning in. Join the Discord. We're Shabbing it up in there. People are giving us ideas for songs we haven't taken any yet this week's was Stacy's Mom

by Fountain of Wayne but yeah man if we keep getting people on there maybe we will do longer episodes and there's also

the Halloween episode we may or may not do me dressed up as BGL briefly yeah so we'll see thanks for tuning in tune in next week

bye