100% Eat - Blasting on a JBL Speaker %% Jimmy John's Fetty W(r)ap Meal

Episode Date: July 7, 2026

Our Heroes say Hey What's Up Hello to Jimmy John's and the new Fetty W(r)ap meal. How do you even say this? Whatever. Get your slappers ready, we recap our live show and Nick's Spurs game experience. Sauce Monkey is a natural vlogger. Oh yeah, the food. What's the point of this? We miss Sauce Monkey Classic. 100% Eat LIVE! at Bell House in Brooklyn on September 3. Tickets on sale: https://bit.ly/100percenteatlive Grab some merch at https://100percenteat.store Support us directly https://www.patreon.com/100percenteat where you can join the discord with other 100 Percenters, stay up to date on everything, and get The Michael, Jordan Podcast every Friday. Follow us on IG & Twitter: @100percenteat Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to 100% Eat, the show where we try every fast food restaurant to let you know if you need it, you probably do. I'm your host Michael Jones alongside my co-host, Jordan Swears. Jordan, how are you? Oh my gosh, after two weeks, we're bad, long, long hiatus. Such a long gap. They tried to keep us apart. And they did. Nick's family.

Yeah. Why did they do it? Nick's family successfully kept this part. To put you on a stresscation. They did. It's real different when you have a kid, huh? Yeah. How was

it's nothing to add Oh it was fine Yeah good times It was fine Was it eh? It was fine Was it meh? Okay

Guys so much stuff has happened Since we were last together The last thing we filmed was the video Of us giving Nick the tickets Oh that's right Congratulations on game five Nick Yeah you win

Wow that was great I got chachos You got you did You got chachos Sometimes things just work out I need 10 bucks, though, for the Taco Polinke. You need 10 bucks? I spent it on my card, exactly.

Why? Accidentally. All right, submit a, like, an expense report. I'm with Michael. Is it worth $10? No. Because remember, it's not just like you filling it out. It's me having to process it, too.

So take me an account, too. Give me $10, and I'll leave it alone. And in the video, in the video, you said that executive decision. Yeah, that's going on the set. That this was going on the set. And he just left it on the table. Okay, what is this? Slap it.

Slap it? Okay. They're slappers. Now you're at the game. All right. Is that what it's for? Yeah. Yeah.

Now do it again. Do it again. Oh, he made his free throws. Oh. It's just like maybe you didn't slap it hard enough. Yeah. Yeah. Well, there were a lot of Knicks fans.

And then this was the thing that, like, the lanyard and it did like lights and everything at you. you can't control it yourself, right? No, it's worthless now. Yeah. Oh, because they like remote control it at you. Yeah, they did that at Austin FC a couple of times. Yeah, but there's like switches on the Austin FC one

where you can like change the color yourself. Yeah, well, this isn't the Austin FC, is it? Yeah. They lost. So, yeah, if they won, it would have worked. Yeah. You don't want to keep the lander in the final 26th line. It's pretty cool.

How close was the game? Keep it on the Emmy. Keep it on the Emmy. Just wrap it around there. How close was the game? It was tight. It was tight up until the end. And then it was like,

Oh, that happened. When you were there and you were surrendered by Nick's fans, not Nick fans. They were very much not Nick fans. No, they were not Nick fans, man. Did it feel like it was close or did it feel like, while we've seen this a few times and I don't have any confidence in what's happening? You're just waiting for an awesome play of like a fingertip in of the... Yeah, I was waiting for Daron Fox to make a shot since he kept taking them in the fourth.

Oh, waiting for a while, huh? A lot of guys pulling up from three. Let him know. fucking talk to him. But what did you think overall experience? We put that video out. You guys can watch it on our YouTube channel. It was fun. Good drink. Good food. Too many Nick's fans.

Right. Yeah. Could have done without that, I guess. Could have done with a better ending. You are, you know, you hated it. And you've said multiple times in the video how much you hated it. But I thought you were a natural. You were a natural vlogger, dude. Yeah. I think you missed your calling. I thought you did a great job. Yeah.

So I think we should send Nick. Another Michael idea comes together. It's true. It's on the ground reporting from Nick more often, I think. Yeah. So we don't have to. You can't get any worse than the first one. Yeah, like if your boots on ground reporting,

odds are it's not going to be Spurs losing the finals again. Yeah. And this might be something you actually like or something good that happens. Yeah, maybe. And it can be like, it doesn't have to be on your phone. We can send you out there like a DJ. Ordsmo and you can like have like a whole rig. Like, like.

Maybe a little drone that follows you around. Maybe next time we do this is like when we go to New York, you can interview people and see how they felt about the next goal and the NBA finals. Oh, that's a pretty good idea. You want to do that? You want to do Man on the Street in a street in Brooklyn? Yeah. We're wearing a Spurs jersey.

You want to go to Times Square and wear the monkey mask and ask people what they thought? Monkey Mask and a Spurs jersey. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then going to be a little. So they, how do you feel about the finals? Spurs were robbed, right? He's, he's walking out with people and he just goes, hey, so what's your body count? He's like, oh, shit, sorry, I'm Austin.

What's your taco? Yeah, yeah. What's your sauce count? Speaking of New York has been announced at this point. I can only imagine tickets are sold out. Jordan, start spread the news. We're going to New York for... We're leaving in September.

We're going to New York. We're sorry. The Bell House in Brooklyn on September the 3rd. We will be live having a live show with Gracie. It's a reunion. We're very excited. Tickets are on sale now. Link is in the description.

And you can buy your tickets if you're in New York or in the I guess Tri-C-A area? How long is it take to get from Connecticut? How far are you willing to go? Tri-State area is not far no matter of way. If you're in the Tri-State area, that's close. Take the train. Yeah, try to get to our show, fool. Well, it's a lot closer than in fucking Austin, Texas. If you're in Philadelphia, you could probably make it.

Anyone in the tri-state area could make it. I'm just going to say that. I'm sure there's people not on the tri-state area that could make it. I'm just saying, now I'm not saying you better show up. Don't just don't tell me. don't fucking leave a comment saying it was too far. Yeah.

If you live in the tri-state area go fuck yourself. It's not too far. Yep. The maximum distance of far is not too far. You just don't want to go or you don't want to make the effort

or you can't. That's fine. I live in Seattle. That's too far. I would have. I would have. I can't. Uh-huh.

They said take the train. It's 60 hours. Yeah. This is a four-day trip. So we're going to be live there. I'm really excited to VIP tickets where there will be a meet and greet V.

V.I. Some of the... VIP ticket. What did I say? Oh, I said, Pete, that's very important bugs. Premium bugs. Premium bugs. So you can be there, meet and greet.

Great stuff, really excited. So we were, because, you know, we haven't done it yet. And last we talked, we were talking about, like, be cool we get it like a poster. And then you went and put that in the thing. So I guess now we're locked in. Yeah, baby. I certainly didn't decide not to do it. Yeah.

No, I just didn't know if we had, like, locked it in yet. Oh, we're locked in. Once you say it, it's locked in. And then you can fold it over it. But I was, when I kept preempts. You can get loud. I kept saying, I think we're trying to get a poster. And then we don't know what the poster is.

You just said whole hog posters. So I was like, well, now we're committed. Also, like, I mean, we can keep talking about it, but like, designed to be determined. But I feel like the size of a poster I want these days is not your 18 by 36 style. You want 25 by 54. Yeah, that kind of like smaller one. You want 25 by 54. No, no.

You want to like be wallpaper. Yeah, centimeters. Yeah. I don't know how big that is. I think it might be this. How many milliseconds. I'm really excited I'm excited for the live show

We haven't picked where we're gonna eat yet We haven't we haven't Nick forgot that that's what the show is I was curious if you did while I was gone I mean we haven't even figured out like How many days ahead are we gonna get in there? Yeah we got figured out but I was thinking morning of

Yeah there you go I'm coming Okay September the 3rd Bell House Brooklyn Tickets on sale link in the description Last flight out the night before Excited to excited to see everyone there.

We just did our live show at Homebrew Austin to the Michael Jordan podcast and a food court delayed justice which you'll be out later. That was a lot of fun. Boy, some fucking freaks. Fucking freaks that

it reminded me of like the old way we used to do or just reading off of them but like my reflex is to be like I need more information. Yeah. Yeah. It's frustrating that the person isn't there and I can't go what's wrong with you explain yourself. virtually. The audience on some of them were just like, what the fuck? You would read it out and they would just go,

there was like mustard on watermelon, the grapest. There was just a rapist. There's like a lot that were just like, dude, people are messed up. Instead, I ran out of jam. I'm just going to put a whole grapes on my peanut butter toast. That one doesn't make any sense. Just grapes replace jam. It's like, what are you fucking talking about? I keep offering to go buy her jam

When she runs out She says no, it's fine, I have grapes Yeah, that's what I said I was like, I was like, just leave your fucking house Yeah, yes Yeah, yeah, yeah Boil down to it, leave your fucking house There's not a good, like, there's nothing I could do

Like, just go to the fucking store Right, just go buy more fucking jam, dude It was crazy Like, come on Spaghetti tub Yeah Oh yeah I got this hat

I got this hat Yeah, somebody gave me this hat Was it, uh, mascot history Paradox Gave it to me Yeah Oh yeah Got it signed

Cool You got it signed it but also I couldn't read it. Yeah, because it's like black marker and a real dark hat. But I think that's right. You still got it side. Yeah.

Mascot history is a YouTube channel. Some fans of this show made it. And it is a... They just... They go through... No. They go through, like, video essays of history of mascots. Here's the Oregon Ducks and all this stuff.

And they said they're going to be doing a UT one soon. And it's a cool mascot. Yeah. I'm getting up to get my phone. So the live show was... Oh, there you go. He gave me and Nick some cool shirts. Yep.

Yeah, they were cool. Nick got a... You can't even see it. Nick got UT colors. I got USC colors. Very thoughtful. Yeah. Very cool.

It was really neat. The live show was really awesome. It was a lot of fun. Unfortunately, Nick wasn't there, but we had a replacement sauce monkey. Unfortunately. Interesting choice of words, though. And then it was weird because when we asked the sauce monkey when it was done, oh man, could you hear us?

He went, yeah, no problem. they fixed it they fixed it everything was so nice yeah that's so great yeah well also yeah you like you had the stage flu

yeah whoever was in the monkey mask that we used yeah this time he felt great yeah he didn't come out we were talking about when we had like

the like the sauce chimp or yeah yeah but previously yeah it was banned it wasn't banned into a different although Armando kind of transformed

he did he was like yeah he went into like bodyguard mode. He was there's crazy. Murder mode. Yeah. It's like the mask. He's standing men and somebody stopped them. You can't. There you go. Hey, Michael, what do we eat today? Jimmy John's

Fetty W. Parentheses are app meal. Uh-huh. How would you say it? So it's it's the fed, it's the Fettie wrap meal because it's a rap, but his name is Fettie Wob. Right. And also he wraps. And so somebody pretty crazy. Somebody

kind of took my route where they got a little too cute with it. Put the parentheticals fucked up the whole thing. Said this looks cool but when you have to read it out loud you go Is it Fetty Watt meal or Fettie Watt meal? It's rap.

Yeah. I mean it's a rap. And it was Jimmy Johns and I'm not going to say that this is a Nick pick but he was a It was a as soon as Nick landed back home from the airport.

Yeah. Like he sent it to us. It was texted. And I was just, I was like... The app sent it to me. He had sales service again. I did. Just keep going.

Stop stopping. This is the main background. The main guy. This is the background. Dude, there is a comment. That was really funny that you read doing us where people watching the episode that came out last week and being like, whoever edits this is a horrible job. It's these three background guys talking. I can't hear the main guy.

I can barely hear the main guy. You can't hear the main happens, dude. It's fucked up. Release the nick cut. So Fetty Wop is teamed up. Fettie Wap is teamed up with Jimmy Johns. I don't know much about Fettie Wap. I didn't know he only had one eye.

Also, wouldn't it be Wap? It's an A? Fettie Wap. Well, I'm not going to say, I'm not going to tell him how he pronounces his name. That's what I'm just asking. It's confusing to me. Yeah. I guess I haven't thought about the pronunciation.

Fettie Rop. Because it'd be like an O. Fetti Rop. I feel like a big. That's good. When there's five possible. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Fettie Wap. I think they, I think they fucked up. Yeah. I think Fettie just wasn't sure. But I don't know what is Fettie Wop about this meal because it's just a Buffalo Chicken Ranch. I had no idea until the second. It was like a guy meal.

Yep. Like, it's just a Buffalo chicken wrap. He's kind of just in the pictures. It's a buffalo chicken wrap and nothing else. Like it's not even. And here's the Fettywop touch. Like, it's just a bubble chicken. About how much he likes raps?

No, I don't think so. Does he have a song about how much he likes rapping? does rap. You know, he like, he does rap. Yeah, so somebody got confused. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They say he's a rapper and they went burrito?

Yeah, he's a rapper. The meal is like with chips in a drink, but it's like, I don't really care about that. This is like the sandwich here. That's how he gets it. So this is like a McDonald's. This is, okay.

They're different. They're different. That's not a usual offering. They're different and you know, you piece of shit. I asked if there's anything else you guys wanted. I, Didn't want to interrupt?

He didn't want to interrupt? You weren't interrupted. That's not interrupting. When somebody invites you to speak, I didn't want to interrupt. His wife comes up to him. Hey, can you give your son a bath tonight? I don't want to interrupt.

Well, no, you just stare. You don't say that. You let her do it. You let her do it. Oh my God. You're so lucky that she doesn't watch this on the TV. I know. I just spoke up.

I got a water. Exactly. And as soon as we sat down, Nick was like, did you see that cookie on the movie? you. Nick and Jordan were talking about a cookie for a long time. Dude, we were trying to figure out what exactly this cookie was. Lemon strawberry burst? So it was like a lemon cookie with strawberry pieces?

Yeah, I think that's what we figured out. But also there were some like other bits in it. Like that could have been lemon. Do you think it was white chocolate though? Do you like? If it was, I don't know about that. You don't think white chocolate goes with those two things? It's just too much at that point.

Well, it's not going to be regular chocolate chips. Yeah, that's what we were. trying to figure out. It's just like the strawberry was so duck. I was like, those chocolate chips. That's awful. When I ordered the food, the girl was the quietest person I've ever spoken to in my life. Wow. Nice change. Walked right up to the counter and she went, there are you. And it was like, what? What? What? I'm great. Her lips weren't even moving. The wind was just carrying like previously spoken. Oh, nice. Yeah. So it's, it's starting to make me think that maybe when people talk about

like the Gen Z stare when they're like they're just talking to you very very quietly and you can't hear it they're just being meek like you can't hear them so I'm wondering if that's what it was

because that's sort of like how the situation felt ordered the wraps and then it was like and it was like you guys want anything else oh Michael wants to drink you're getting a medium drink

forcing no much is medium drink yeah dude drink right to the point cool free smells, hard of hearing. Jimmy Jans got it. They got it all, baby. Jimmy Jams?

The smells were smelling. Pretty, yeah. They were cranked up. That smellometer turned up. What would you do? It kind of is like Subway-esque. Yes.

Yeah. I think it's supposed to smell like fresh bread. It was like a bread type smell. It smelled like spoiled ranch to me. Right. Right. What's up with that? Well, they didn't use any.

I don't know. They did not use any. You are right. Yeah, you're right. That's how Fetti gets it. I came out swinging. Yeah, maybe that's his thing. I get the Buffalo Chicken Ranch.

Hold the buffalo. And also, I love whole tomatoes. Yeah. Tomatoes were confusing. A confounding sandwich sort of... Put those right out. Through and through. Also, in a wrap

that was not cut. Just a... Yeah, that was strange, too. Just a burrito. She asked if you wanted it cut, but you didn't say anything. Oh, shit. She might have.

Oh, you know what? I had turned for one second. And then she went, you want to cut this? No. And I went, okay. You look back and you're like, must have been the one.

Was that? I'm sorry, was that an idea? Weird. Not to cut a wrap. I thought maybe it was, I thought maybe I heard a smell. Oh,

those are free. They, they come to you. Us, we got. Boom. That was weird. That was a weird sign.

I took a picture of it. It's we us God. Sorry. I took a picture of it because it was really, we you got. We, Boom, there it is.

Says we, you, God. And then it says, we deliver sandwiches. You! Eat sandwiches. God! Bless America. Oh. That's my thinking of what I eat a sandwich.

That's strange. And also it looks like Pepsi. It looks exactly like Pepsi. Pepsi. We, you God. We, we got. We, you God. We, you God.

Pepsi? We, God. We, you God. We, you God. Don't know why that sign's in there. Really strange. They had another sign. You eat the food.

You eat the food. God, damn it. It also kind of sounds like it. That's pretty good. It also kind of sounds like Jimmy John's calling themselves our God. Like, will you God? Yeah, we, you God, son. We you got.

We you God, dog. God, damn it. Jimmy Johns again, huh? There was another sign that I didn't get a picture of because I felt like they were looking at me while I was taking pictures of these signs. that said like, No, she was just talking to you again.

We what, she couldn't hear it. She said, she kept saying, sir, your order's ready. Said, we,

we would, like, it was like, we want to see you naked. Huh? What the fuck is he talking about? What the fuck? Have you seen this?

I'm gonna look it up. What the fuck is he talking about now? John's, what hell? I'm not looking that up. Failed on that one. We'd love to see you naked, but stay.

Code requires shoes and shirt. No. We love to see you naked. We you got! You we naked! So it's a... Show ass! And it's like a biggest word is naked.

It's also like a Chevy sign? Yeah. Why? What the fuck? So it's like they're being cute about like you got to wear your fucking clothes. Right. But they're doing it by telling you we'd love to assume. Yeah.

Oh, if they weren't stopping us. That's strange. It's very strange. And now it's really, it's making more sense. Oh, wow. It's making more sense the fettie rap-wop thing. These guys are a bunch of geniuses. We see you naked.

Let it speak for itself with the hidden camera in the bathroom. That's right. I put the sign up. No, no, that's Buckees. We, C's. Feet. Yeah. And a tongue mojee.

There's another thing. A lot of confusion, at least that I saw on the Discord, people from the Midwest, there's another thing called Quick Trip. What? With a K. K-W-I-K. Yeah. Quick Trip. Huh.

Which is probably why Quick Trip, the other one, just calls themselves Q-T all the time. Huh. Well, I thought it was because they're cuties. I thought they were talking to us. Hey, Judy, come on in. There was a comment on the YouTube. We're the only Q-T I see. We got, you got, you be naked.

What the fuck? Do you guys, I mean, we don't really go to... Bang! Yes, what he said. We don't really go to Jimmy Johns a lot. Do you guys... That's all I know. You guys want to learn about Jimmy Johns?

Yeah. No big game hunting accent. I'm tired. Target. Our last Jimmy John's episode was September 30th, 2025, where we ate pizza sandwiches. Dude. Received an average rating of 40.5. Those things sucked.

I was to say any memory of pizza sandwiches? remember not liking them. I don't remember how they tasted, but I remember they weren't good. Yeah. Yeah. That tracks. Fact. At Jimmy Johns, the smells remain free.

You can just go in there and sniff around. You can smell anything. And the monkey means anything inside the Jimmy Johns. And they can't stop you legally. But they will try. Oh, they'll try. Is that where you were the last two weeks? Fuck, that's what you used.

It's just in there sniffing around. Yeah. It's just a free-for-all. Time for the feed-up Coordinating the feed-up in the discourse Coordinating the feet-up A New York feed-up? Wow! He's been homebrew feet-up first.

Oh, wow! Just came fresh off a feed-up. Damn. Fresh feet up, stinky feet. No shoes, no socks, no problem. We do a feed-up in New York. It's like, make sure before the feet up, walk around barefoot the city for that. Go a couple blocks.

Step on a rat. Let the smell of the city get inside you. Bruce Franklin is going to come out of nowhere and start to bite at you. So I'm assuming Mom Donnie's coming to the show, right? I think so, yeah. Okay. Oh, you know what? We should definitely invite him.

He should just be there. I assume once he hears of it. Yeah. Well, he's on Mom Mommy. You're invited to the show Bell House, Brooklyn. Now he's not coming. You cut that. Oh, man.

You're a piece of shit. You dumb piece of shit. You dumb piece of shit. Putting his foot in his mouth again. No, we're talking about him. I'm talking about him. Hop on in. A week ago, Inspire Brands,

parent company of Jimmy Johns filed confidential paperwork with the U.S. securities and exchange commission for an IPO taking this private company public. Inspire, which also owns Arby's Sonic Burger, not called that, Duncan, and Moore, is looking at a $20 billion valuation which makes it ripe for the picking

for more private equity to invest in Roar Capital, which is the private equity company that owns Inspire Brands. Well, as long as they make the food worse and more expensive, but stay sassy online. we're in, say thank you to the billionaire sauce monkey. Say thank you. Oh, go. He's going

Luigi style? Damn. It's a private equity company that owns all this stuff and they're taking the company that they own not their private equity front, but the company piece that they own public. The one that owns all the exactly. Like the arm of the company.

So Inspire Brands is going public. They own Arby's and Duncan and shit and it's just like oh, all the places that have gone down hill that are just like exponentially worse and worse? Hell yeah, dude. That's what we need. They'll get better. When you got to generate value for the shareholders,

that's how good things happen. I don't. Look at Alamo. Yeah. When you're just you can just got to trim all inefficiencies. Really crazy. Like when you're washing. They should just stop serving food actually. I hate that's a huge over. More and more I go there. I hate it more and more. I went and saw Supergirl and I had such

a problem with trying to order the food. Like the credit card. I did it was like I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. It kept like airing. I'm in the middle of them. We were trying to order the fucking food.

And then when it finished, like they sent me the bill at the end and it also wasn't working. But you like can't change your credit card information at that point. So it's like, oh, you have to go talk to somebody. I was like, what was the point?

Dude. It was so frustrating. Yeah. It was so fucking frustrating. I went to, I left my sunglasses there. Yeah. And I called the next day

because I was pretty sure they were there. Um, fucking rang for like five minutes and it went to a voicemail. I was like, nobody even works there. Hit to the phone! waiting at the outside. I know. I know. At the front. I was just like, Jesus

Christ, dude. I will say, though, they called me back. They had them. I went to go pick them up. They were like lost and found. It's like a small thing. Dude, there was like 45 pairs of sunglasses. Oh, you could have said. I was like, holy shit. My other 44 pairs. My box of sunglasses. These are the nice ones. I went to Galaxy Highland to go see a movie. And it was awesome because it was that movie The Furious I talked to you guys about.

And it was the right amount of rowdy for a movie that is the right amount of rowdy and I was like I haven't been to like a movie like this in like a long time it was really fun even Alamo used to do rowdy screening yep I went to cats once which was a good rowdy screening to go to screaming cats hell yeah you're just screaming at the movie cats going what is this

real quick I went to Alamo a couple weeks ago saw Disclosure Day with my friend Paco and it was me and him and one other person in the theater and halfway through the movie it got real rowdy It was funny. He actually got up. He was going to the bathroom. And he had seen it before. He was like, I know

this is a good time to go. And this one scene is ending. And then suddenly the screen goes black and these lights flash in the corners of the screen. And I'm like, whoa, immersive experience. Alien abduction. And then it goes fire alarm has been activated.

Awesome. Great. So it's me and the other guy in the theater. And I'm like, well, if it's a fire, maybe we should use the fire exit. Yeah. And I, like, walk up to it. I was about to push it. And I go, wait a minute.

I remembered I parked on, like, that side of the building. And I saw, like, a company that does, like, fire suppression systems. Oh, they were testing shit. I was like, wait, this could be a test. Yeah. And the guy goes. Like, for you specifically. Well, the guy goes, well, I don't see any smoke.

So we might be safe to go back. And then we went back in there. They were like, it's a test. Feel the door. Don't touch the handle. Yeah. Oh, smart. Mm-hmm.

Yeah. Like the backer hand, I think. But anyway, and then it took him like 35 minutes to get the movie playing. Jesus Christ, don't worry. It's not worth it to sit through to watch the episode. There was one point where, like, they got it showing again, but it had no sound. Come on. So I was just like, it's just VLC media player at a fucking Alamo.

Like, it gave me that hard. I was like, okay, I won't watch it. The theater was interesting that it had like the stairs that go up to the last row and I was in the last row. And there's like, that was also where like the food runners come in from is up there. And so a guy kept coming from like behind us going, is it fixed yet? Cool. I was like, no. Fuck. Cool. Yeah, it was quite a time. But also, I didn't mind it too much because I did not like that movie. No. There you go. Well, that was the most interesting part of the movie.

After fighting out Emily Blunt's character in the movie was from Cerritos. Cereidos. Which is where I'm from. Yep. And those are facts about Jordan. But how about some more Jimmy John's facts? We can get back to the show. She's British. She's British? Not her character. I know. But he had to say it. Southeast Michigan detectives are investigating an armed robbery at a Jimmy Johns were a man broken with a gun and demanded access to the safe the employees did not have access to the safe so the gunmen instead stole their purses and ran away the police have no leads and are asking the public for help

boys we might be witnessing the perfect crime this guy is gonna get away with two bags a half a pack of gum and maybe 38 bucks this guy is the new DB Cooper imagine breaking into for some reason a Jimmy Johns and they going open the safe and they go we just work here we don't have access to the safe

yeah I don't even think he broke in also what would be again in the same it would be documents that you can't do anything with like what no that's probably where they have the bonds oh that's where they keep their

you guys are going IPO right their bullion and gold bars where's Mr. Inspire Brown I've done this to an Arvys I know he's exactly what you have. Show me his office. I was thinking about that the other day,

like there was a break-in at Zeds, like an ice cream place here, and I was like, who's trying to rob a fucking moron? No one has cash anymore. No. Give me other cards. Give me your iPad.

That sells all the money. Also, even if they did, like, that's, they're gonna go to the ice cream place? Right. They're flush with cash. That's all they do is ice cream. Well, they heard cold hard cash,

and they said, let's get after this. And folks, and that's why I'm working for Jimmy Jones. Okay. Bang! You're done for. The company that runs Jimmy John's restaurants in Bloomington Normal, Illinois.

What a cool name? Yeah. Okay. There's two of them. There's Bloomington Strange. I see. I see. What's your definition of normal?

Don't get able to us. That's his job. Don't you hop on over here. Hop on it. Shit. It's fucked up. We'll get to that after. In Bloomington, Normal, Illinois,

is said to be the victim of a massive. passive theft and money laundering scheme. Whoa, cool. Jason Simmerley, 51, made automatic payroll transactions of more than $100,000 in the names of former employees, then directed the money into his own bank accounts over an 18-month period. Simmerly faces seven charges in all, including four Class 1 felonies, which carry possible prison sentences of up to 15 years if he's found guilty. Honestly, did this guy even consider just stealing purses?

He would have made it out. He would have made out with it Scott Free. weird sentence, dude. Is that racist against Scottish people? This guy is racist too? Damn. I can't believe you would say that to Scottish people. This guy was transferring this money over $100,000, making these two transactions. People didn't work there anymore.

Yes, for former employees. They cannot figure out how he's connected to this company. He has not worked. He has not worked for the parent group. He hasn't worked for any. that has touched any of this stuff, they don't know how he got access and they don't know how he had any connection to this whatsoever. So this is the new Frank Abagnon.

He picked a place and he went, I just take all their money. And then he just did it? All right. Dude, did you put your mind of something? That's crazy. To do like digital transfers for employees that don't work there and no one's like looking at the payroll and it doesn't matter. And you just go, all right, yep, we'll just scoop all this money into a bucket.

This is, uh, my brother worked with a guy who did this at the company he worked at and like embezzled a bunch of money. Really? Wow. But exactly this with like former employees and like, but he worked there. Wow. So that's how he had access. And then it's easy to find because then you go, oh, this is the guy who touches the money and you figured out. Right. They were, right. Money was getting stolen from them and they were going like, what fucking account? Like what is this? This would be like of a fifth person who's not any of us somehow was like, we're just getting money into our bank. It's crazy, but she just has the logging. Well, yeah, we gave it to her.

Yeah. Hello. It's me 100% eat. But they found him, they arrested him and they are throwing the fucking book at this guy. He is like, he's going down hard style. This is a cool, like office space style. It is very much. White collar crime.

Really, really crazy that he was able to do it for as long as he did it too. 18 months is a long time for 100 grand too. Yeah, I feel like he earned it. Yeah. It's not even like that much of a ripoff. You know what I mean? Like that could have been his salary. Yep.

They should have been paying attention to their books. Come on, Jimmy John's in Bloomington normal. Yeah. What are you doing? Now this is Bloomington strange. Bloomington's like a $70,000 salary or something. Yeah. Yeah.

Think about it. You just take it. We gotta figure out of rob the effort in. I used to work at a company. I just can open the Chase app. It's tempting every time. I used to work for a company and they had me. Hey, where'd all this money go?

I don't know. Okay. It says Michael logged in. Yeah. Is that it? Whose mortgage is this? Yeah. Hey, look at it.

Now? Not mine. It's like a Thai Pennington. I don't have a mortgage. Don't look at me. Mine's paid. I finish it. But those are the facts.

Yeah. Do you guys learn a lot about Jimmy News? Were they Feddy facts? Yeah. No, they weren't. I didn't learn anything about Fettie. Yeah, there's nothing about Fetty in there. They don't know about his eye.

Nuh. So let's get back to his. able as well so the story that Nick miss is when we were doing the meet and greet after the show at homebrew austin we were taking pictures and we had a fan and come up in a wheelchair and first of all Eric said I won't take a picture with you but we convinced him you don't have to make it worse than it was he couldn't even get through it he just he just thought of that right in my head right in my head it just it just came to him and it just I made him go over you.

My favorite part is as it was happening, immediately attacked you, she attacked you and you looked at me and you're like, God damn it. He loves this. So it was like, oh, you want to take a picture?

Yeah, we were chatting and we're like, and he's been saying this the whole time because we'll chat with people, but we want to then get back to moving the line along whatever. So it's like, oh, hey, get in, then takes a picture. And Eric goes, want to hop in here

and take a picture? And she just goes, I don't hop anywhere. And we just started laying into it. I just, I just doubled. I just tried to curl into a bowl. on the ground. I can hear Michael howling and I'm like, well. Eric was just like, okay, yeah, well, well,

fuck. Yeah, and she's like, she's like, ah, it's just my sense of humor. She was like really trying to like, it's okay. And he goes, oh, it's a, oh, I know, it's Michael's too. At that point, it wasn't really like, you weren't worried about offended. No! You were just like, I can't believe

I said that. I want to die. Yeah, it was definitely, I can't believe I said that and I can't believe I said it in front of Michael who's never going to let me live it And she like, as soon as you said it, she was on it. She was so sharp. Nailed it. And it was just like, oh, fuck.

Am I going just going, yeah, hop up. What the fuck is wrong with you? Why would you say that? So fucked. So fucked. The meet and greet was awesome. It was great. It was really cool.

We got a bunch of stuff. A lot of people in cosplay, there's a cosplay contest. Yeah. And Garbo won. Garbo won the cosplay contest. Yeah, I signed one, Googleie I. She asked me to sign that. Garbo I. It was pretty good.

A lot of sauce monkeys. Mm-hmm. Yeah. At least two. Mm-hmm. A three. Yeah. There were multiple monkeys. How much did they want for their masks? I don't know. I don't think you want them. No, I don't know. I didn't know we were supposed to be making offers. Yeah.

And then right after us, we really have three. Because we were like the last show. We had plenty. They had a rave. Yes. And the rave was like starting. And one of the monkeys was like, I'm rave monkey now. Yeah.

They were posting in the Discord. Yeah, Raive Monkey was going to tell you. I thought the pictures. That was great. It was cool. It was, uh, the bar was good. The food was good there. Like, everything was cool.

It's a great spot. It's the same spot we did the last show. But they changed the name. It was funny. New management, bullshit, whatever. Well, it was entirely different on the inside. Yeah. It was the same layout, but they like moved the furniture around.

Yeah. But it was really cool. It was a lot of fun. And, uh, home brew is, is a really fun thing that they have like a cool, like, weekend deal that. I don't want to put words in their mouth, but am I hearing that they're trying to, like, next year do something a little different?

Oh, I hadn't heard. Okay, well, I don't want to speculate. Interesting. Is it at the Bell House in Brooklyn? Because that's our live show. Oh, boy. Oh, that's right. That's this year on September 3rd.

We're warming up for them. We're opening for them. Yeah. Well, in advance. Yeah, this was a good warm up. Yeah. We're now warmed up for our own show. Yeah, yeah, I feel the same way, actually.

Yeah, you'll go in college. Yeah, you'll be fine. That's okay. I kept saying that Armando sitting in there doing nothing was still a better performance than you last year. Hey, when you couldn't hear anything. You're going to be pissed when you watch this. They email me back. They're like, oh, he's sending it over, whatever.

You're going to be pissed when they watch it. And then we give him the microphone and he doesn't talk. And then he goes, ooh, and he gets the biggest reaction. And he's just soaking up your claps, dude. Dude, just soaking up. He went sauce monkey classic and he crushed. This is his new punch. Yeah, dude. He was getting checks.

He was getting checks and taking him to the bank. He was only doing, like, he was doing physical comedy. He was like, he was doing some physical comedy. thing too where like he was doing some physical comedy and there was one where like I set him up I was like what do you think and it was like long pause yeah uh-huh and the crowd way up here for it he was like eating microphone

like spaghetti yeah because he was asking he had the cord dangling out of his mouth with the wire on the microphone it's pretty funny he was asking us before he's like so like sauce monkey doesn't talk right and I'm like well he used to not talk and we started this new company and then we took a vote and we said he's allowed to talk me and Michael voted yes and Jordan voted no

and every day Jordan is vindicated hit his fault. No, he's not. He doesn't know anything. See, he wouldn't be saying that. Oh, I'd be... Yeah. He'd be...

Yeah, you'd be holding a design that says, I'll kill you, but it's backwards. I lost the pen. It was crazy. Jesus Christ. He almost turned off the computer. He threw it on the search. Just even, even the, like,

the sporadic movements Nick just made, you know, like when he wears the mask, that mask doesn't turn with you. Oh, yeah. It's like a shoulder thing. Armando, it's just his head. It fits so well, it actually turns.

He can look around and stuff. Yeah. Yeah, it's crazy how it just looked like a normal head. It looked like a normal man almost. Dude. He's not, he's just huge. He's a huge. He's a tall.

He's a tall. He's a guy. He's also, he's also like 19. Yeah. I mean, he's older now, but like, he looks great too. He lost a bunch of weight. He is just like, big. He's just purely big.

He's big. He's big. Yeah. He's like Andre the giant who like never had to work out. He's just naturally big and strong. I went to breakfast with him,

Roses and Griff the next morning. We went to Kirby. And it was four of us sitting at a table and it was like, and it was me and Griff. Our feet like tucked under the chair. You know what I mean?

Like we're sitting normal. What I'm kids. Dude, Armando is just like has to be like leg out like. Yeah, dude. Holding a fork in night. Oh dude. That's crazy. Like, getting on flights.

I was gonna say it's gotta suck to fly to be that big. Brutal. Brutal, brutal, brutal, brutal. Like tall people in general. Yeah, flying, flying being that tall. That's the thing. I'm the perfect size for a plane seat. Yes.

I'm like, it's made for me. That's it. I wish I could shrink a little bit. Honestly. You just benefit. It's made for normal people. I'm like the average size of American males. It's made for normal people.

So yeah, regular just fit right there. It's flat right in. But boyfriend material was a lot of fun. They did a great job. Yeah. They gave us a great. sticker. Yeah.

I forget exactly what it says. I have one in my car, but it's about, it's like, you now after having watched this show, you're like good at eating pussy. Yeah, but I've not put my skills to use. I haven't tested. Yeah, the bathroom is. I was reading it in the green room and Griff was like, this is good. This is, you're reading it exactly how it's the story.

She gave out the stickers. You were like, who stickers? And Jordan was like, maybe I don't want this one. Yeah. I put it with my stuff immediately. Yeah, it was, uh, it was. It was good. It was a lot of fun.

Great live show. And then back to Jimmy John's real briefly. When at the end, no. At the end when we were about to leave, we got the sandwiches. Great. And she went, here you go. And she just handed me four sandwiches. They were just, there's no bag, there's no nothing.

She just went, here are your sandwiches. And then I just stood there. And I looked at you. And I looked at her. And then I looked at you. I was just watching it going, I don't know what's going to happen next, but I hope she doesn't offer him a bag.

And then she went, oh, actually, do you want a bag? And I went, yeah. It's just so weird. I thought about it because, you know, they're right there. You imagine that's usually the system. Just make sandwich put in bag, hand to customer. Was there a series of just like one person orders and then like you just hand them the sandwich?

Like, I guess I would take that and it would be fine. I watched the guy get his order and it was in a bag. And still, it's weird though. Like, they always put it in a bag. It would be strange. Anytime you ever get a sandwich. McDonald's doesn't hand you a French fries and a hamburger. You know what I mean?

They should. They shouldn't. That's crazy. Dude, they finally get rid of the big Archburger. I had that thing so many times when they was there. They really should bring that back as like a permanent single. Because it's all, it's huge. Not being able to get it singles, the only reason I didn't get it sometimes.

But like, that's a delicious sandwich. There you go. Unlike Jimmy Johns. There are things in the past that they've made permanent menu items, right? Like, that was like originally, like the chicken selects, or whatever. Yeah, but they make them permanent, but then they always go away too, right?

So they do have chicken strips right now, and they're not good. Every time I get, they're always stringy. Yes, they are. They're not cooked well at all. They're not good, they're not. Especially when you can get just the McNugget. Right, and the nuggets's like,

ignore the, like, the meat, the quality, but like the cook, it's always like, you know what you're gonna get. You're gonna get the crispy McNuggett, and it's like the complete opposite with the chicken strips. It just, they fucking suck. They're stringy or like,

they're like overcooked or like tough sometimes. Yep. Every now and then, I'll be like, let me just get chicken tenders. And every time I go, why do these socks? Why? Yeah, why they do this? Yeah. They are, McDonald's is really chasing a lot of limited time stuff, too.

They keep bringing back pies. They keep bringing back. Yeah. I'm not about pie. They're coming back. But I thought they always had pie. They do, but they change like the specialty pies. They have a deep fried one, a deep fried apple pie now, which is not what they've been doing.

Oh, I see. And then they have a blue, they have like a blueberry, blueberry lemon one or something like that. That's what it is. They keep, like, changing it over. And it's like, is this getting people in store? Are you just running through inventory? Like, what is the point of this? No one's going.

I wasn't going to go to McDonald's, but now they have blue pie. Yeah, let's go. Yeah, it's very strange. Hey, do you want to learn about the food? Surely they will mention Fetty Wapp in this, right? Okay. Mr. Wap. Hey, what's up?

Hello? That's from the song. Oh, did I read it right? Yeah, you sounded just like Fetti W. Hey, what's up? Hello? Jimmy John's teaming up with FettyWap to bring the energy of summer

straight to the menu with the number 1738 Fetty meal featuring the brand new Buffalo Ranch chicken wrap and Buffalo Flavored Jimmy Chips. Did it feel like it brought the energy of summer? No. No, not even a little bit.

Nothing about what I ate had the energy of anything. They're just saying, they're vibe chasing. Yeah. Why is it called hashtag 1738? Is it hashtag or number? I think that's like the number

I think don't they have like weird numbers with like their sandwiches? Oh yeah. It's like this is like the number 712. Dude, I'm not, I'm not, I don't know what is it. Jimmy John's reference. I don't know what's a Fettie Wap reference. I don't know.

I'm just lost over here. Tough. I'm swimming. But 1738 is also like a song from him. Oh, okay. Okay. So it's double. Yeah. At the center of the, he asked the fair question and you were like

no, I just say, but that's what Jimmy John does is the number and it's 1738. At the center of the number 1738 Fetty meal is the new Buffalo Ranch Chicken Wrap made with all natural chicken asterisk and drizzled with Buffalo Wild Wings. What? Medium buffalo sauce.

Crazy right? Lired with fresh lettuce. Drizzled. Tomato onion sliced celery. Crispy carrots and Homestyle Ranch all wrapped in a soft flour tortilla. Was all that in there? Hey, so did you guys have any of that? Well, I hate celery.

I didn't notice. I feel like I would notice it. I think I noticed some of the carrots. Hey, I didn't notice any ranch. Definitely. Do you think it's like, is that what was watering down the buffalo sauce? Maybe. Because it was kind of like

light orange. Oh, I had to dip mine in spicy buffalo for McDonald's. Yeah, I took some of that too. There was none? Like nothing. Zero? There was a ranch. Hey, don't worry. There's hardly any chicken. There's plenty of tomato. Do you work at the Jimmy Johns? She he didn't say yes. Yeah. She was like, do you want the ranch? Do you want the buffalo?

I didn't hear it. And he just kept saying, I want to be naked. I want God. God wants me naked. Also, by the way, there's tomatoes in this. And I know for a fact Michael doesn't like tomatoes. That's fine. I don't know problem. Has it? Because at least like they're, they're whole. They were, boy, they were whole. I saw you open yours and I went tomatoes. Get those out of there. Yep. See you later's. Yeah, dude. Hey, check it out. Presbytero. Quote, Fetty Wap helped define the sound of the summer. Okay, cool. And we wanted to bring that same energy to our menu. He's just saying the same thing.

They love the energy of summer. What did he do to bring the energy of summer? No. Maybe we'll find out. Said Suzanne de Rushi, vice president of integrated marketing. Oh, it used to be segregated before. Oh, boy.

Here you go. Jimmy Johns. The meal is iconic flavor forward and built for fans who know that some eras and flavors Never miss. So they've said nothing about what he had to do with it. Michael, would you describe what we ate as flavor forward?

No. I described it as really good hangover food. I was like, man, you know, sometimes like you're hungover and you need to eat, but like your stomach's upset and like even something that's not that potent feels like it is. Like, oh, like so intense, like food, food and upset at you. I was like, I got no problem with this. It really, for something that was buffalo and ranch, I didn't taste either. And that's usually a pretty easy, strong flavor.

Yeah, just buffalo sauce and then ranch. I mean, the, bubbles got like a, like a pow, but there's, there's nothing behind it. The most flavor forward part of it was the turkey, which is notoriously not flavorful. The thing that I... It was cold. The thing, yeah, it was so cold. The thing that I tasted the most was tomato, and the tomato. didn't taste like anything.

It was salt. Needed salt. Nick kept talking about how this should be a salt tomato. Salty tomato. Yeah, he was talking about that. And then you guys just ignored him. Well, yeah, because I think it's a crazy thing to say. I mean, I heard him.

Yeah, we heard him. That's exactly what he said at the time. I don't think he said fool. Earlier. No, I know you're adding it now. I'm just saying earlier. Like, wearing glasses was the movie. I took them off.

Yeah. And he gets back on. Well, we have our. review of Jimmy Johns we need to hear from you in a second week call you review you review you review no no Daniel on this one

just three I'm over him yeah I don't want to read anymore Daniel L's but you will I kept it out of Houston this time you will yeah back in Austin I think whoever reads the first one is the third one the second one's a little big that's all care whatever you want to do all right I'll take Garrett

shit about any of this this is from Garrett P claims that they cut lettuce at three oh my fucking Christ Christ Why? Why would you read? 3.30 seconds? 30 seconds?

Yeah, 3.30 seconds? 3.30 seconds inches. Yeah. When it is actually thicker, that's the sentence. Okay. According to my calculations, hold on here. According to my calculations, paper is 0.004 inches thick.

The lettuce, 3.30 seconds, equates to 0.09, which means that it should be exactly 22 times thinner, but the lettuce was thicker. And using experimental procedure, we obtained a piece of the, quote, Jimmy John paper and stacked 22 of them and deduced that the lettuce is in fact bigger than 3.30 second inches. Thank you. What?

Michael can't believe it. Using experimental procedure, we obtained a piece of Jimmy John paper and stacked 22 of them. And to do this that the lettuce is in fact bigger. This was a one-star review. Bang. Don't make scientific claims that can be disproven by science. Jesus Christ. Come on.

This is the Mythbusters. Like that one I believe. That I believe is real. Mythbusters, but food is a, that could be something. I'm sure it is something. This is like our next show. Our next show starring Garrett P. He can be the Jamie and no one likes it.

Come on. on. Yeah. So he's doing science on his Jimmy John sandwich. Why? So what was the What's he? What's? He doesn't like about which part of it? So because of this, I'm mad. Why? Yeah, right? Where did they claim that

they cut their lettuce? I'm just saying even if all this is true, whatever the fuck you're saying. What's your complaint? Right. Well, they lied. They lied about the lettuce. The lettuce is filler. Where do they advertise that their lettuce is 3.30 second inches? I'm sure they don't. Yeah. Yeah. I'm sure they don't

advertise that. I didn't see that sign. Yeah. Oh, I saw that we you got. We got and get free smells, get naked. Oh. It's insane. We got we got 22 pieces of cheese on paper. Wait, what are you

talking about? I think you're doing great. Shut up. Jesus Christ. All right. Jacob B. This one seems less scientific. The worst Jimmy John's experience I've ever had.

I typically place my orders in the app and pick up in shop to save time waiting in line. Sometimes I do order in shop, but not today. I placed my order at 1144 a.m. via the phone app. Got it. I arrived around 1149 a.m. Five minutes later. My order was not yet ready for pickup, so I sat down and waited.

There was no one in line when I arrived, and soon one guest arrived and placed his order at the front register. The next customer in line arrived, and she had a pickup order. next was a Round Rock police officer that arrived and got in line. The first guy finished. The next lady waited off to the side and then the police officer ordered. Once the first guy who arrived after me got his order and left the store,

I approached the register once the staff asked my name. Is this a math problem? I asked if my order was in the queue and they stated that it was. And they had to finish three online orders ahead of mine before they could start mine. Then the police officer got her order and left the building. I stated the fact that I should have placed my once sandwich order in shop because I would have been gone by now. Right, you should have.

I then requested a refund. Staff at the register stated that the manager can issue refunds, but that she, the manager, was on the line making sandwiches and could not leave the line to issue a refund. I waited at the register. They finished my order and tried to hand it to me. No bag. I asked if my request for a refund was going to be honored.

The manager said no. I made your sandwich. I asked for the manager's name. but she would not offer it to me. I stayed cool, calm, and collected the entire time. I got my sandwich at 12.03 p.m. and left. This is the last time I am a patron at this location. 1203.

He was there for 12, 14 minutes? He got there at 1149. He left it 1203. If you're going to be somewhere in five minutes, order it there. Or it is faster. That's not. a Jimmy John thing? That's an anywhere thing.

Yeah. For sure. You're not, the online orders... You're not cutting everyone in line by placing an order. And also, like, the online orders specifically do get made slower around the in-store people because they have to serve the people there. Get them out. But also, it's easy to do that. Because you ordered online. Yeah.

They're, ideally, 20, 30 minutes. Yep. Five. You don't order five minutes before you get there. He was in the parking lot. That's the dumbest idea. That's the dumbest idea. You absolutely never do that at any restaurant. Fucked me up.

At least he stayed cool, calm, and collected the entire time. All 10 minutes? You always... Which I believe, because otherwise he would not have it. Here's the other thing, too, which negates this entire thing, and I guarantee you 1,000% when he ordered it, it gave you an estimated time. Yes. And it probably said 12.3. Yep.

He... None of this changes when they probably... They try to tell you, because when you order it online, ASAP is never, never faster than 15 to 20 minutes. They will not quote you a time. If you order it right now, it doesn't matter if the store is empty, it doesn't have if there's 100 people in there. He ordered this, it guaranteed, told him 15 to 20 minutes. Who cares that you came five minutes later?

That's your fault. It has nothing to do with other people being in front of you, nothing to the people coming after you. You got a quote for your time. I guarantee you they gave it you at the time. You're fucking idiot. Yeah, but like they're now in line. And anyone who's ordering in person before them

is behind them in line. Right. But they don't know exactly how. it actually works. None of this affects your order. None of this affects the time they gave you. There's no, hey, it'll be ready in 20 minutes, then you walk in and they go, turns out it's dead, it's actually ready now. They do not do that anywhere. No, yeah. You're an idiot. He didn't have to keep track of the cast of characters.

Dude, that was crazy. That was so much. It's just a lot of... It's an algebra problem, yeah. It's a word problem. It was like reading like a written. Shut up. For what? Yeah. What even, he didn't even say, like what was your, obviously there's an name from you You want a refund because you ordered it online and other people got their food before you, but I also guarantee you your food was not delayed.

Yeah. Sir, what time did it say your order would be ready? That's the information not in here. Well, that would harm his case, I'm sure. When I read that, 14 minutes. It's not not mean anything to anyone. Crazy, dude. When I read that review and it says 1203, man.

That's not that long of waiting. It went in and ordered in person. 1203 is like a great punchline. Yeah. Is it awesome? What a tag. It's pretty incredible. I do that at Chipotle all the time.

Like if I want Chipotle, I know it's going to take 20, 25 minutes if I order it ahead of time. If I'm like driving and I'm like, oh, I want Chipotle, I order it there. Yeah. Just get it because they're going to make it immediately as I go down the line. Yep. That's how every place works. Fucking great.

12.3. Holy moly. Incredible. Yep. All right. Well, last one. Here's from J.M. I went there with my family, parentheses,

on December 31st around evening time. Okay. And we were the only customers, sorry. Only customers there. Out of the blue, one of the workers, why don't I have to read this one? I didn't say you had to.

You picked it. Out of the blue, one of the workers, big fat black guy, short, curly black hair with glasses, started to screaming and shouting extremely loud and started singing for a good, minute or so to the point that it was ear piercing loud. I feel like Colin Jost all the time.

At first I thought there was a fight between workers. It was very unprofessional and unnecessary. And the guy should have been fired just for doing that. Okay. Yeah, that's why. Yeah. And then what? I wanted to come up to him and punch him in the face for ruining our dining experience.

I hope his manager or HR reads this and takes disciplinary action. We will never come back to this location after this incident. So, I walk in. There was this big, fat black guy who was very unprofessional. And I wanted to punch him in the face.

What the fuck? Who the fuck sings on New Year's Eve? Nobody. They sing on New Year's Day because that's what the clock has been there. Holy hell, dude. The racist ones are so special Because they have

What? They have no idea And they don't like, I don't know if they think other people read these Or if it just goes in a bucket somewhere They hope corporate read it Yeah Yeah they hope corporate reads it and go

We hired a black person What the fuck? I gotta punch you in the face What? Jesus Christ I wanted to punch him in the face For ruining our dining experience You were at Jimmy Johns

on New Year's Eve? Eve. What in the fine... You're lucky there are people there. Forget whether or not they're singing. Dude. They go. The people in the singing wasn't the part that I think they dialed in on. Yeah. Yeah. Interesting. You know. There you go. Well... I just think if they

look different, they wouldn't have mentioned it. I think you're right. They're just being thorough explaining the situation. I just have a hunch. That's it, dude. They're just explaining the situation. It's a good hunch. You just want to have all the details as you can. Thorough. They're being thorough. They're painting a picture. Yeah. It's a picture, all right.

Well, those are your reviews of Jimmy Johns, but we have our reviews of a Jimmy John's Fetty, Wop, rap, meal. Which they still mentioned, what does it have to do with him at all? Yeah, yeah. It's like, is it what he ordered? He's bringing the sound of summer, they're bringing the food. Is this what he orders?

Is it different in some way? Nothing. No mention at all. They emailed his manager. Yeah, they just said you. Put name on? But you can do? Yeah.

We'll Photoshop a picture of you winking. We rap, you wap? Yep. Nick? Money? Fucking. And then they answered, he's not winking.

And I don't hop around anywhere. Fucking nuts. I can't believe I said it. I can believe he said it. It wasn't how. It wasn't like that he said it is how he said it. So intentional. Yeah.

So intentional. He kept saying, and hanging around with J.M. Yeah. And he kept saying, do you even need this? Prove it. That thought it was really weird. He said, I'll race you.

I mean, it's all of bad, dude. Well, thanks for coming to our meat and greet. Jesus. September. What do you think of the Fettywop wrap meal Buffalo chicken sandwich wrap? All things considered, there's nothing really wrong with this.

Agreed. I have like, I have minor complaints because why didn't you cut it first of all? Yeah. And put more sauce on it. More sauce would have been nice. And it was like, the tomatoes maybe.

But like other than that, I mean, yeah, it's just, it was a chicken wrap. Yeah. Honestly, not much to say. 50. Yeah. There's not much to say good or bad. Yeah. Like, we've said what is bad, but that's all there is. It's not egregious.

Um, it was actually, like, I was really glad to eat it today of all days. To not have like a disgusting dripping grease like thing. Like, because my tummy would have been upset. So I actually, just for my circumstance today, I'm 55. Wow. I'll give it five more because it helped my tummy. A fettie five. He has a fettie five. I just gave it a fettie. Um, yeah. Uh, yeah, you didn't drink half a bottle of fire. ball last night. 52.5. Wow. Which is... Guarantee better than the pizza shit we had last time. Yeah, and it's inoffensive. It was fine.

Yeah. They definitely should put more buffalo sauce on. Yeah. And ranch. Like, like... I mean, it wasn't even red. No. No. It was... I can't articulate you how little... Yeah. Water. Nothing. The inside of the wrap should be orange. Nothing. It should be.

I'm agreeing with Nick, unfortunately. It should be. No. You're just like being right today. Yes. Just today. I agree. today. There it is. Well, let us know what you think if you go get this thing because I don't think it's very much food at all. No, I didn't.

How much was it? No, yeah. Was it expensive? Oh, you know, I don't know. Oh, wow. What a privilege. I know. Don't forget, we owe him $10. These were $10 a piece. Okay. I mean, not crazy.

I was trying to think of like... That's a little expensive. It's a little expensive. Well, that's what I'm saying. If that's $7.99, it's a great, that's a good sandwich. Yeah, $7.99. Yeah. For not having any bread. I was wondering how much it costs.

For doing a tortilla, no bread. No thanks. Yeah. There you go. But there you have it. Jimmy John's Fettywap. There we had it. Nice.

Hey, you can join us in Brooklyn on September the 3rd. 100% eat live. We can join us. I can just watch. Yeah, you can watch. You're in the crowd. The stage is where the show is. We welcome you to come watch and shut the fuck up.

I mean, you laugh, obviously laugh. Even if you don't think it's funny laugh. Don't start talking at us or with us or we will yell at you. Yeah. And not in a nice way and not in a funny way. In a way that makes you go. It'll be funny. It'll be funny for sure, just not for you. There you go.

Let us know in the comments. If you're watching this on YouTube, get in comments. Let us know a fast food place we should do in New York. We haven't picked yet. So we have some options. We have time. We also need to inform Gracie. When do the tickets go on sale?

They're on sale now. Oh, are they already? Oh, okay. Like, for real? No. I mean, when this comes up? I'm asking real life. Oh, they'll be on sale tomorrow.

Okay. Yeah. Yeah. So, early tomorrow. Yes. Tomorrow starts the two-day thing. Yes. Got it.

Yep. Okay. Now just makes it true, man. You got it. People are listening to this a week later and like, what's going on? Don't worry. Don't listen to this part. This is for me, not you.

You're not part of the show. It's for me. Nick will edit this part. I will say we need to film something. Oh, yeah. We'll do that right of this. Yep. Leave it in, put it back.

Put it back in. Oh, Jesus. But please join us to New York. We're really excited for this live show. You can also grab merch at 100% eat. dot store. I think we might have merch at the show. Maybe something special.

Yeah. Michael Jordan podcast is available weekly at patreon.com slash 100% eat at the grackleteer, but you become a 100% fan and get a shout out on the show. Jordan, all may long, people had a chance to become cucks.

We have the cuck picked. Something very soon happening, I think. But you have some shoutouts to read because that's what you get with the 100% fan. Yeah, we have so many shouts. We'll probably be reading news probably well into 2027. Beautiful. Good. I like it. We're hitting

three again. This one is from Andy who has a hammering. Even though she'll never hear this, had to hammer my girlfriend whose response to me getting into a raffle sweepstakes slash legally whatever it has to be to meet a couple of kings and others. Come on.

Who talk about fast food was quote, that's the dumbest fucking thing I've heard all year. Wow, wait, he did that in May, so that was almost half the year. It was pretty congratulations. He responds, you eat cheese weird too. Oh! I need more information on that.

Hey, can be a future food court. Yeah, submit the food court. Let us know. Let us know. Submit to food court. You get a priority submission. You're on the Patreon already. Next up, Osric, aka Clyde is Epic on Discord.

Okay. Shout out to the Cuck Chair. I hope I win or find $20,000 on the 4. floor or something. I mean, you can find $20,000 and then maybe you can get a cut to your experience. You can find it in your bank account and send it to us. It's not maybe. You will. Yeah. You will. Yeah. You could 20K? You can play. You can skip

the line. Big ups Eric. Listen to the MJ podcast. Nick liked the food. Yeah. Yeah. He did. There you have it. And lastly, Jeanette offers this. I can't wait for you to have a million shoutouts to read because of your main promotion. Good.

Also, you know, because of your billion followers that you have. Definitely a billion. True. I just wanted to give you one more to read, less than three. Okay, okay. Thank you, Jeanette. That's funny.

Hey, I know you have to read a lot of these. Check this out. Read this. Idiot. Here's one more. They go, bitch. Well, you can sign up for a 100% fan and you can get your thing read in about 2027, maybe. You follow us at 100% eat, Blue Sky, X, the Everything app or Instagram.

You can also send stuff to the 100% treat PO box It's a PO box 143241 Austin, Texas 77-14 P-O-box 143241 Austin, 77714. Look, give me out of here. We got a lot of stuff. Jesus, man. Yeah, we do. A new 100% treat hopefully coming soon. That had a

curve on it. Why'd you hit them on? That's a slider. I was trying to get it in this cup. Everybody was running late today, so I took a detour over the P. There's a bunch. They had a box that was too big for our Oh, wow. For our... Ooh, almost in the bounce. thing, so I had to go, like, meet someone and they were like,

here it is. And it's like this big. And I was like, you're going to hand that to me? Cool. And was it in a bag? Yeah. No. Not even in a bag.

That would have been funnier. No, it was funny that it wasn't in a bag. Oh, right, right, right. Anti-Fund. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Michael came in and thought bag was. I know. I know, I explained that part.

Yeah. Well, now you know. I mean, I knew then already. I don't know why he's bringing it back up. Great and subscribe to all for a show eat food, show feed. Thank you for watching. It's funny. I think I got more pizza to push out.

Oh, no. Oh, no, not again. See you later.