100% Eat - Buffalo Wild Wings Doritos Flamin’ Hot Nacho Flavored Sauce

Episode Date: April 26, 2022

In this episode, Michael Jones and Jordan Cwierz eat and review Buffalo Wild Wings Doritos Flamin’ Hot Nacho Flavored Sauce so you know if it's worth eating. They also talk about Nick's buffalo mac n cheese, how empty B Dubs is, forgetting we've eaten here before, and more. Download the audio version at https://bit.ly/3unlcWf. Sponsored by: Upstart (http://upstart.com/facejam), Honey (http://joinhoney.com/facejam), and DoorDash (download DoorDash app + FACEJAM). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is a Rooster Teeth production. I don't hear it. Did it stop? No one's slacking. I mean, it wasn't a constant, never-ending sound. No, it was just a sound that made you go. It was just. It was like when you're watching. It's like when you're watching football and the commercial will come on for slack and it would make the slack sound and it would give you a pit in your stomach. Or when you're listening to the radio or maybe Dateline and there's some sort of siren in your car, you got to look around and go,

why? Why would you do that? That's true. You know I'm looking around now. Now I'm gonna get in an accident. Rubbernecking! Ow! There's not even a real accident.

But you're not here. No. By accident. Mm-mm. You could be. Most likely, I heard a ding. Most likely,

that was you. That was not me. I'm not dinging. You were dinging. I have nothing that dings. I didn't hear anything. It was you? There was a me. I'm not dinging. You were dinging. I have nothing that dings. I didn't hear anything. It was you? There was a ding, but it wasn't me.

I heard a ding definitely from this side of the room, and he's the only one. I can't trust witness testimony. It was me who dinged. And the two of you, I sat here as the two of you berated this innocent man, swore under oath that he dinged when it was my watch that dung the ding. I thought he was just like, why would I ding? I have no reason to ding. Trust Iowa's testimony. Welcome to Face Jam, the show where we try every new fast food creation to let you know if you need it

and also give you tips, tricks, and more on how to catch the criminals or maybe become a better one. That's up to you. I just put the information out there I'm not telling you that as you will okay? This doesn't make sense anymore you probably do Michael Jones alongside my co-host Jordan swears Jordan. How are you you filthy accuser look? I was just trying to sleuth it out. Hey sometimes sometimes you just gotta sometimes you gotta start sometimes you start screaming it's you and other people join in i just want to see i want to see if you would crack and he seemed very defensive he seemed very defensive a little

too defensive i will why would i do i have nothing to gain by listening i will not rest until I find the persons or person who has dinged OJ Simpson style. Whoa. Yeah. Yeah. I'm going to write a book if I ding. If I ding. If I dung. Listen, I didn't ding.

But if I was going to ding. If I was going to ding. Here's how I would ding. Yeah. I'm going to lose a lot of money in a civil suit. If I was going to ding, here's what I would ding. I'm going to lose a lot of money in a civil suit. Today, we're reviewing, which we have already consumed,

if you did click this by accident, the Buffalo Wild Wings Doritos Flamin' Hot Nacho Flavored Sauce. It's like a sauce they put on. That's a lot of words. Yes, it is. It's a lot of words, and it ended with the word sauce, which confused me. I thought the word chicken was coming. I really thought it was. We didn't just eat the sauce. Yes, it is. It's a lot of words and it ended with the word sauce. Yep. Which confused me. I thought the word chicken was coming. I really thought it was.

We didn't just eat the sauce. It was on chicken. Right. It's not just the sauce that they put on it. Can we get the sauce, please? Nick's fucking dream come true. Right. A woman just came out with spoonfuls of sauce and she said, down the hatch.

She said, which baby's hungry? And Nick went, ooh. He just kept saying, wah, wah. She said, which baby's hungry? And Nick went, ooh. He just kept saying wah, wah. Is Flamin' Hot not trademarked by Cheetos? It is. And Cheetle Dust?

It is. It's just Cheetle. You don't need to say Cheetle Dust. It's like saying ATM machine. For all the people accidentally here, I wanted to make sure. Okay. And again, this is not, we did not consume anything with Cheetle here. This is Dorito.

Yeah. Dorito. I mean, that's the assumption. Right. That it's Dorito. We don't know if they're smart enough to come up with a name for it. Cheetos already did it. Just take it.

Follow the precedent set. Certainly a weird meal and a weird name for this food as it did not seem like a sauce and it just seemed like something it was tossed in yeah why did they call it a sauce because i don't know well don't you toss it in a sauce what but they have dry rubs and stuff and i feel like this was closer to a dry rub than it was true but it was a wet rub it was it was a little wet it was wet i'm just saying it wasn't dry. But it wasn't sopping. No, it wasn't sopping. Not as sopping as the macaroni and cheese buffalo.

Yes, that's what I would compare it to. There were some bits on the chicken where you could see no sauce. There was a lot of bits on the chicken with no sauce. Some naked bits. Because I think, when I think of a sauce, I think of Nick who needed the buffalo mac and cheese so goddamn bad. What do you mean what? What do you mean what? I mean, that's what happened. of Nick, who needed the buffalo mac and cheese so goddamn bad. What? What do you mean, what? What do you mean, what?

I mean, that's what happened. You said, let's get it, and then make sure you get it. Yeah. And then are we getting it? And then kept saying, get it. He also said it after we were done ordering. Yeah.

I mean, you didn't order, but we had decided what we were getting, and then he just kept reading the menu. He finished eating it, and his eyes rolled back in his head, and they came back, and he said, we should get that buffalo mac and cheese,

and we just went, but you just, what? We said it's been three weeks. We ordered the food, right, and then Eric got half of what we should have gotten. Bullshit. And we started talking about sides and it was like, okay,

we'll get the cheese curds and the fries and that was it. We all decided, we're like, good. And then Nick goes, I got the buffalo mac and cheese. It was more that. And he goes, good. And then Nick goes, hmm. I got the buffalo wing mac and cheese. Fuck it. He just mentioned it. It was more that. And he goes, should we get the macaroni and cheese? It was really posed like, what is?

What would that even look like? To be on both sides of the fence. Then it was like, well, Eric asked. And it's like, well, he did ask. Right. But then we had already finished deciding what we were getting. Yeah, it was settled. And then he kept going down the menu.

Speaking of Eric asked, he did ask in the restaurant where we know what we're going to get. What do you guys want to eat? There are specific. I went to answer him and he spelled out. Because you were out of answer. No, you were out of mind reader. Michael sprung into action. He leaned forward and was like, I'll tell you.

Yeah, he was about to. Eric goes, what do you want to get? Stop. And then I start to answer, and he goes, da-da-da-da-da. You know what I mean. Don't you. And then he keeps talking. Because he was about to give me guff.

He was about to go, oh, cheeseburger or something. And it's like, listen. I was going to say the Dorito things is what I was going to say. And he went, da-da-da-da-da-da. And I was just like, you stopped and waited for, and he goes, no, and then I threatened to slap his phone out of his hand.

That was the question to get your attention. Then I had your attention. Think about getting mad. Then I had your attention. And then it was, do we want bone in wings? Nobody would have stopped me. You just stopped talking.

You said, what do you guys want to eat? And then you cut off the response. Shut up. Yeah. It was a very, we sat down, and then I was like, don't you start with me. So we had to decide boneless or bone-in. We also had to decide the number of wings we were going to get.

And then we found out it was boneless Thursdays. Yeah, and here's the thing. I was all set on we all were going to get 10, right? 10 boneless wings. Keep it simple. Felt good. I said my thing is like, look, if they're not good, why get boned? I feel like that's saved for a good wing.

Yep. I didn't expect these to be good. Just give me boneless. I'll suck it down. We'll move on. Yeah. And it was like a 10 each. Then when the waitress came over, she's like, oh, let's buy one, get one free.

And I'm going, oh, this is amazing. And it cut me off. And I was like, 80 wings. No. We were already going to spend the money anyway. She's like, you can do like, you know, 20 and then the other 20 are free. Right. She's like, or.

And then I'm like, oh. Or. Or. 80 wings. 80. And he's going, or. Or. Or. 80 wings. 80. And he's going, no. No. Could you imagine 80 wings on that fucking table?

I imagined it the whole time. Nick is over there shaking his head so hard. Yeah. He got mad at the end when I looked at Jordan. I was like, imagine. This could have been only half of what we ordered. And he was like, we'd only be half done. And I was like, no, we'd be done.

We'd be half of what we ordered. I said, well, Nick could have eaten five. Be conservative and guaranteeing at least five. He's a monster, but I'm still not blowing out a proportion. I'm like, he would have eaten at least five more. He goes, ten, I would have eaten ten.

I was like, alright, calm down. I could put away 20. It's not a contest. He's ordering ten more right now. Give me 10 more. He doesn't think I can do it. He's a fucking monster. He is a monster. He made an outrageous claim that he's not going to eat dinner, which is bullshit.

He just said, I don't have to have dinner now. And Michael just went, yeah, right. We're going to go home and say, hey, they got to have to have dinner now. And Michael just went, yeah, right. Yeah, immediately went, yeah, okay. We're going to go home. We're going to go home and say, hey, they got buy one, get one. He's going to make his wife buy four Wild Wings. And then he went, well, the kid's eating solid food now.

He did say that. You don't have to. Maybe he'll want some. He said that. And then he also said, look, his first meal out was Arby's. Like, the kid's got a taste for it. And I went, you decided that. You chose to take him to Arby's. Like the kid's got a taste for it. And I went, you decided that. You chose to take him to

Arby's. Like, hey, can you believe it? We said, pick anything you want and the baby said, Arby's. My kid ran out the car, jumped in the seat, and he drove up. He picked Arby's, so that's what we ate. Kid can't get enough of it. They have da meats.

Very impressive sentence structure for a child who is probably a year and a half. Something like that. Oh, goodness. 15 months? 15 years. Crazy. Never mind. Not that impressive. Of course he has a taste for Arby's.

So, Buffalo Wild Wings. Dude, this place was sad. It was a sad state. Is this what used to be the Applebee's that we went to? No, I think that's up the road a little bit. Okay. This Buffalo Wild Wings has been there. That's where he got lost on the way.

I was trying to go to Applebee's. I will say, I was so nervous when we pulled up that they were closed. You're cranky. I'll tell you that. I thought that they were closed and I went, what the fuck are we going to do? Because that parking lot had three cars in the parking lot. And about nine construction workers outside. And I went, those cars all belong to the construction workers.

All of them. No, you can tell they're not construction workers' cars because they're parked in parking spaces. That's right. They're not parked on the grass, diagonally, upside down. Like, look, I get sometimes they have to park, like, on the side of the road. But most times they don't have to. But they do anyway. They just kind of do it.

I'm going to park on this fire hydrant. I don't mind. I'm just going to balance my car on it. The Buffalo Wild Wings, we walk in. There's the signage, so I know the food's there, and I know they're open, so I'm thrilled. Also, a picture of a big old Mountain Dew. Just an original one. No blue one.

They were just reminding you, hey, Mountain Dew. Yeah, this is something that goes with it. Okay. All right. Thank you. Walk in. Wait at the front for five

probably right around there maybe less but not more and then eventually just went and we'll seat ourselves at the bar area I saw someone eating and I was just like maybe they just served themselves yeah you can't look at the picture of the desolate restaurant

he took it on the way out pod no one at the restaurant that is the the picture you took was basically the majority of like the main dining section and you took a picture as we were walking out and i said hey did you ask their permission there's not a single fucking person fucking ghost knows how many ghosts are we all i probably packed packed. We also started walking towards the inevitable bar and Nick made some sort of comment about like, oh, I guess we'll sit near the bar. I'm like, that's kind of the whole restaurant.

Yeah, the whole, I mean. It's all very bar adjacent. More than half that restaurant was the bar area. It's true. All the high tables and stuff. That's a lot. We were talking on the way over about Buffalo Wild Wings and I don't remember how we got there, but basically said, you think people go there for wings?

Yeah. Go there to just get drunk. Yes, yeah. Like yell at the games. Yell at the TV, yeah. Because their beer's cheap as shit. They are ready to watch one TV that's tinted so fucking green. Oh, my God.

It was so green. Everybody looked like the Hulk. They really, you are not exaggerating. There were just just arbitrary commercials, and of course there was no sound or there was sound. I tuned it out. But it's people lifting up their shirts. Whatever.

It could be for fitness or whatever. I lost weight. And it looked like a commercial without sound being like, I'm fucking green here too. And I'm green here. And my back is green. Help me. It's like a Better Call Saul commercial.

Are you green? Companies have been making people green for years. Look at me. I'm green. That was like the biggest TV in that bar area, too. And it's so fucked up. And the liquor section was just like your friend in college who had some bottles at his house. That's what it looked.

It was just me and Nick going, hey, can you mix me a drink? And they go, no. And no, we're out. Oh, I didn't say what I wanted. Yeah, no, we're out. It was like this bottle or this bottle. It was like really fucking crazy. But don't worry if you were wondering if you were going to get your ID checked.

Yes, you will. From Ash Ketchum from Pokemon? Dude, we're sitting there and we can see on a little whiteboard they have propped up like at the bar, like behind it where they would like walk in and out.

There's a little drawing of Ash Ketchum. I could see that from far away. I don't know what the fuck it was. And so immediately we're like, what? And we go to take a picture of it. And I zoom in on my phone to take a picture of it. And I zoom in on my phone to take a picture of it. And it says

something like, it's like Don't remember. Don't forget to check all IDs. And then under it it said, gotta check them all. Yeah. And it was a decently drawn Ash Ketchum, but with really weird eyes and mouth. No pupils. Ash's eyes are

like 90% pupils. Yeah, so it just looks like his eyes have rolled into the back of his head. Oh yeah, in the drawing. He had checked all the IDs. And I looked at it and I said, I thought, would Cat know who that is?

It's old enough where she wouldn't, but Pokemon's still relevant enough where she might. Right. And now we'll never know. Yeah, well, I'll ask when I visit her grave. Do you know who Ash Ketchum is? He just did the sign of the cross. Oh, man. It was a fucking empty Buffalo Wild Wings with one waitress and I think a guy behind the bar.

And some people frying some wings in the back and that's it. No one came to seat us. We just sat down and that was... The waitress was just like, people! Hey! Yep. She was like, shit, I'm supposed to do something. I don't remember what it is. She was, I mean, for the four

tables that she had to serve, she was doing a great job. But I imagine that's probably why there's only one server at that Buffalo Wild Wings during a lunch rush hour. It ain't nobody there. Was Nick like, yeah, but at night

on the weekends, or on a Friday night, I'll just wait until the big game. I don't want to know what it looks like. I don't want to ever be here on a Friday night. I'm like, you'd be surprised how packed it gets. I won't, and I don't ever want to be. The kind of person who goes to a Buffalo Wild Wings on

a weekend night is the kind of person I don't want to be. And if you're listening, we mean you. Yeah, 100%. Yes. Nick. And he's got to get a babysitter to do it. Well, no, he's eating solid food now. Taking him to Buffalo Wild Wings on a Saturday. Make sure he wears the little headphones.

Oh, my God. Make sure the baby wears little headphones. Yeah. Oh, my God. His son also, he kept saying, my son loves Hooters. Yeah. Because my son loves Hooters. We go there all the time.

He likes the new uniforms. He said they're good. He said he likes it. Nick walks in and he's like, it's his idea. Don't order the chicken breast. Hold the chicken. Again. That was his joke.

That was his joke. Oh, did my kid tell you it's my birthday? He did it again. He always plays this trick on me. Every time we come here it's my birthday well you're already here you might as well sing and then camera zooms out it's a bunch of owls sleeping on the rafters

there they are that was a that was a one side track dude it got off track because I Hooters is in my head because I just saw a thing

like yesterday or something and it was like first ever father and son golfers sponsored by Hooters yeah it's John Daly and his kid it's like him and his kid and son golfers sponsored by Hooters. Yes, John Daly and his kid. It's like him and his kid.

John Daly's got a kid? Yeah. Does he also wear funny clothes? He looked like he was funny. And so it's them with two women wearing Hooters outfits. And I was just like, man, they really, it's still called Hooters because they put the owls on it. But like, it's 2022 and you're at a restaurant. It still called Hooters because they put the owls on it. But like it's 2022 and you're at a restaurant. It's called Hooters.

And I was just staring at it going like, it's crazy. What a weird time to be alive. There's not even like subterfuge, like Twin Peaks. It's just Hooters. Just call it tits. Like the restaurant. It's just crazy. It's like the owls have cemented them in place.

But it's still called Hooters. It's a real 80s thing. It's fucking wild. It's still called like Booba or something. It's a real fucking place, and Nick keeps taking his fucking kid there. Well, his kid keeps taking him. Oh, sorry.

That's right. Get it right. This kid's an experienced eater. Oh, man. Did we wet our whistle? Yeah, I'm definitely wetting our I'm definitely oh what's your opinions about B-dubs um

I think I think we really got into it that's a real you're out and someone goes wanna drink somewhere and you say that's right there

and then you go there and you drink beer and you hope it's not a night where there's like a big sports game on and everyone's yelling because it's gonna be like a fucking

cafeteria you have a panic attack inside of a Buffalo Wild Wings. So I've been there. It's fine. It's not like, you know, the pit of hell, but it's certainly not a place you would say, hey, you know where we should go? Yes. It's another one of those traveling restaurants.

They're always near a hotel. Right. It's like, fuck, we could just go in there. It's easy. Yep. You just get a boneless wing with something wiped on it. Like when you're trapped in Frisco, Texas. Yes.

And you can't really go anywhere. You got to stay around the hotel. And it's like, well, there's a sports bar across the street. It's definitely like me and my dad going to spring training baseball. Like Peoria, Arizona. And you go, well, we're eating here. Or did you train your dad? Bombshells or whatever.

Yeah, it's that. And you just go, god damn. You did? Was he, or did you train your dad? Bombshells or whatever. Yeah, it's that. And you just go, god damn. You did? Was he good? Did I train my dad? Yeah, he hits dingers, bro. Damn. He should play with your friend Jeff.

No, I saw a video where he didn't play very well. Oh, my God. I did not watch the other video. You got the Pierce Morgan version. Did you see that? I was in the middle of something in that video. Explosive new interview. And it is just two men going, I think you're a liar.

No, well, I think you're a liar. I think you're very dishonest. You are dishonest. It was. What an incredible. If you think the 2020 election was secure, you're a fool. If by explosion you mean. So you're a fool. If by explosion you mean... So you're a fool.

Which is very loud, like an explosion is. It was like, just from that clip, you just watch it and you go, I guess the president of the United States. No, my president. Oh! I did that. Not anymore. He did that.

I did that. Jordan did that. Jordan did that. Can we make I did that stickers with our faces? OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I did that. I did that. And everyone just goes, who the fuck? Who's this guy? Who's this guy? Who's this guy raised the price again? Okay, put that in right now. We need to make Face Jam. I did that. And then they can come out with the Let's Go Face Jam shirt. We got to get more than pointing, though, like shrugging.

Like, I did that, question mark. A very, like, low-key, neutral one, arms folded. I did that. I did like i did that a very like low-key neutral one arms folded i did that i did i did like the idea of having an underline over every like different underlines over it i did that i did that i did that i did that like the idea of going to a gas station and seeing that, and it's not- Picture of Jordan. It's not, like, it's Jordan. It's me waving. I did that.

Oh, my God. All right. It's just, I did that. Have a great day. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Who did that? Who did that?

Who did that? I did that. Oh, my God. Another meeting in an episode. See, that's where we're strongest walk around a little bit we went one further and we made money we just made so much theoretical money

you know how much a sticker costs to make I don't know 20 bucks if they won't make them they used to be 2 cents now because of Biden we gotta put the I did that sticker that's the joke he came up with the I did that sticker on the I did that stickers. That's the joke. He came up with the I did that sticker of himself, so he makes all the money from people buying it.

It's fools running on the hamster wheel. Oh, God, I'm tired. Haiku. All right, here's a haiku. Haiku. Wings that fly nowhere. Drowning in Doritos dust. Life in Buffalo.

Wow. I love it. This one's depressing. I think you hoped it was drowning, though, but we've already established it was not drowning. Yeah, more like coughing. Yeah. Oh. It's a Pokemon.

That's why Ash Ketchum's there. Full circle. Oh, that made me think, like, you know the kid in middle school who would always draw anime shit in their notebook? Yeah. Was that not you? It's like, but yeah, so like. Yeah, you know, me.

There's the kids who don't make it. That one ended up in Buffalo Wild Wings. It was like, I could draw ash on the whiteboard I mean again it was a pretty good drawing it was not bad it was great it was not bad

insane eyes I feel like there might have been fuckery though I think so too it was a dry erase board I think someone dry erased his eyes funny for them to go

for the eyes and not the check the IDs thing yeah yeah hey how do you feel about having your haiku on a HomeGoods style sign isn't that awesome

yeah I think that looks so fucking cool that I'll say it'll tie together any room that I'll say do you feel about having your haiku on a home good style sign isn't that awesome yeah i think that looks so fucking great that i'll say it'll tie together any room that i'll say is probably the one of the longest in face jam histories of we should make this to it coming out yes that took forever but i think it was because they like went oh if we're gonna do something like that it should be part of this other line that sure it's also fucking dumb yes like but in a sense of just like there's nothing else made like that where they can go oh we already have that material exactly we already have the you know like there wasn't there wasn't a uh

red web right like sign right there's a shirt but there's not there's a shirt and a podcast based on the shirt but yeah that they had to like invent the whole thing and then like the first one is always like finding the right supplier and then how many

you're gonna make and blah blah blah blah but I saw that in person I saw the test print god months ago

and it was like excellent yeah I took a picture of it it was just sitting on the desk cause like the the e-commerce team was was on the other side of the temporary office that we moved into for two years.

And I was just walking around, going through people's shit, opening drawers, checking wallets and stuff. And I was like, oh shit, the face jam thing. And it was just sitting there on the desk. And I was like, this rules. This is so stupid. It's so good. damn thing and he was just sitting there on the desk and i was like this rules this is so stupid it's so good that along with the monkey face pillow that says 100 eat on the other side it looks like it's printed onto it it's cross-stitched like it's actually yes it's like

actually stitched in the pillow it's awesome it is such a fucking cool i can't wait to have that sounds like too much like good quality craftsmanship for us i'm gonna keep it on my couch in the living room and my wife's gonna fucking hate it. Your daughter's gonna love it. Because she's gonna go, I don't wanna look at Nick all the time and then I'll flip it over and say 100% eat. So then you solved it already. There you go. Problem solver.

I'll say this, I don't know when it's coming, we are making maybe my favorite product of all time. Oh really? Talking, you talking. I'm talking, yeah. Yeah. Again. I have no idea. You do.

Oh! That is legitimately the best thing. I just went, I have the stupidest suggestion ever. And I'm pretty sure their answer was basically no. It was like, uh, no, we're doing other things that's not stupid. And I went, okay. And then like two months later, out of nowhere, they went, hey, we made this. And I shit my pants showing everyone that thing

when they didn't know what it was just showing like the video of it in test I'm telling you the hype is real there's a face jam product coming down the line if you liked the monkey plushie of just like I didn't expect that I think this is up there with that

it's up there with the haiku board I've never seen a podcast do anything like this before. It is thrilling that it will say Face Jam on it. It's thrilling. We keep pushing the envelope. Yeah, it's an original idea. First the sign and now this. It's so cool.

It's going to be cool. It's so fucking cool. I would like to propose a new Face Jam challenge with the sign, though. Okay, yeah. That makes sense. What is the challenge with the sign? Buy jam challenge with the sign, though. Okay, yeah, that makes sense. What is the challenge with the sign? Buy it. Buy the sign.

Excellent. And then go to your parents' house. Oh! And hang it up amongst... Don't tell them. Yeah. Parents, stop listening. No, no, no, but I mean...

Hand the podcast device to your child. But I mean, like, you can give that to somebody and they not know the context. Like if I gave that to my mother, she would hang that up. Oh yeah. She wouldn't know what the fuck it is. She has shit like that. I want to see it snuck in. Like the Jesus Ewan McGregor pictures.

Dude, that's such a good idea. Hanging it up alone is a great challenge. Getting someone else to hang it up without knowing what it is is truly perfection. Yes. Where it's like, I gave this to my grandmother and she loved it. And it's just on a wall of tchotchkes and I made a little porcelain lighthouses and little angels and shit. A bunch of baby Jesuses.

Oh, there's all kinds of babies and puppies and seals and shit. And then sure enough, right there in the corner, live laugh love. Yeah, do that. Take a picture. Tweet at us at Face Jam Podcast. You can also trick them by throwing in a shitty one like from a store. Give them two at once. Like something from Tuesday morning. But don't take a picture of theirs. We don't want to see that.

Yeah, I don't care about that. Actually, I care so much I don't want to see it. To say I don't care would mean I wouldn't mind if it was in the picture. I will mind. Don't send it. That's good. That's good. And yes, we mean you.

Let's learn about B-dubs. B-dubs. Let's learn about B-dubs. B-dubs. Our previous B-dub wing episode was released November 10th, 2020, where we ate the pizza wings and orange chicken wings. They received an average score of 45. Wait, we've been here before? Okay, well, here's the kicker.

Although this is a repeat episode, nobody remembers eating at Buffalo Wild Wings for this show or what pizza wing tasted like or that orange chicken wings were a thing, so consider this episode a first. You were telling me the other day we'd never been there. Really? Until I wrote this fact sheet this morning, did not know that we had been here. I thought we had gone, but don't care at all in any way. And you were so, no, no, no, we haven't been there. I was like, oh, okay, I guess I'm going to do another one.

We did. Guys, can you believe it? We've been there. I thought it was a wing stream. I was just going off of you. We went to Wingstop before. Yeah, we did go to Wingstop. And so that's what I, okay. And then when I read Pizza Wings, I went, what the fuck was Pizza Wings?

And then I read Orange Chicken and I went, I remember this combination now. Because they both sucked and it got 45 I feel like that was probably more than it deserved I think that was like mid pandemic I mean it was I think 45 was just excited to be out of the house November 2020

still in a car excited to be out of the house remember when we did the show in the cars what a weird time I don't know why we didn't just go inside Good lord. Excited to be out of the house. Remember when we did the show in the cars? Because that's... What a weird time. You know what? I don't know why we didn't just go inside.

That might be the... All right, fuck off. It was so windy. That might be the episode where the blue cheese got all over... I think that's when the blue cheese got all over my car was the Buffalo Wildlings episode. Did you get something in your car at some point? All right, fuck off. Give me more facts.

Fuck you. Okay. Eric was giving me facts over the weekend saying we've never been there. Yeah! I'm torn. I had no idea. He's like, everyone kept saying we've never been there! He said it and I was like, I don't know.

Was he gaslighting you? I think he was gaslighting himself. No, I just didn't know. I also, I also like, I also like now it's gotten to the point where I've been saying this recently too, and someone's like, oh he's gaslighting you and I go, no that's just lying! It's lying! You can just lie! People say that stuff, it bothers the fuck out of- Oh man, oh you're being gaslit. No, they're just lying. It's lying. You can just lie. People say that stuff. It bothers the fuck out of them.

Oh, man. Oh, you're being gaslit. No, they're just lying to you. It's just a lie. This is just a lie. You're really doing it. I know you learned a new word, but they're just lying to you. There's also all these cult leaders going, no, it's so much more than that.

You have no idea. You don't know what it takes. I gaslight. You lie. You simply't know what it takes. I guess like you lie. You simply lie. How dare you? Although Wings is in da name, Eric wrote dove for some reason, B-Dubs actually sells more boneless wings than any other food at its restaurant.

And if that made you say, those aren't wings, they're adult chicken nuggets. Please recognize that this restaurant is for guys to take their future ex-girlfriends to so they can watch the Lakers lose by 22 and get Call of Duty-style pissed about it because they had $11 riding on their DraftKings bet. So chill. That kind of summarizes how I feel about Buffalo Wild Wings is just that kind of guy copied and pasted to every open seat and every girlfriend who's just like, I'm just happy to be out of the house. This is fine. This is date night.

Whatever. I mean, I said I wanted to go to Olive Garden. He said they didn't have TV. How many girlfriends did you take there or dates? Did you go on to? He's saying two. You know there's an answer. And he answered immediately.

Should we be surprised? No. That's why I asked. I was so confident he would say yes or one. Was one of them your wife? No. Okay. Or he would say, believe it or not, no.

Did you go and watch the Spurs game? Yeah. Did you get Call of Duty style mad? Yeah. Damn, dude. I'm telling you, there's a specific kind of guy. First you get red wings, then you get red. Yeah.

Were the Spurs green that night? It was so green. In 2016, a vegetarian customer sued B-Dub-Dub for frying their food in beef tallow, but the suit was thrown out when Buffalo Wild Wings showed that they never claimed their food was vegetarian. If you are vegetarian, why are you going to Buffalo Wild Wings at all? It's not called Buffalo Regular Wings. What did you expect? What does that even mean?

They're getting wild. Buffalo Regular Vegetarian? I think wings implies me. I don't think the word wild is putting people away. The wings part. I should have slapped your phone. If they were buffalo regular wings,

they would fry it in canola oil. Oh, so the wild thing is the beef tallow. They're getting wild with beef. They're frying chicken and beef? What the fuck? Wild. I don't think that's wild at all. Serve it on a pig.

I agree. Everybody just stopped doing that. McDonald's was doing that up to a couple years ago. I fill my bathtub with beef tallow. I call them veg heads. All these veg heads were freaking out that their McDonald's salad were soaked in beef sauce.

Why did you fry my salad in beef tallow? It's in everything! I'm sorry, we put your fries in the beef juice. They said we would never see our families again if we didn't put everything in the beef juice. They said we would never see our families again if we didn't put everything in the beef juice. Just by breathing in. Your Coke, beef juice.

The ice cream, beef juice. That's why the Sprite is so spicy. It's the beef juice. That's why their Coke tastes different. It's the beef juice. Think about it. You can't breathe without getting beef juice in your lungs. And the final factoid.

In March 2020, a B-dub security guard pepper sprayed a man who came in to place a to-go order for his daughter, but the security guard didn't have a private security license and also had an open criminal case against him, so the man sued. Hey, what the fuck is a B-dub security guard. So this guy just blasted someone for coming in and ordering food? So this criminal... Right, right.

He came into a Buffalo Wild Wings... This imposter. It was like, I'm the security guard now. What are you doing? I'm the B-dubs bouncer. Like, there's a, what the fuck is a B-dub? Why is there a B-dub security guard?

Was there a security guard at the one we went to? There was hardly staff at the one we went to. Man, nobody wants a security guard anymore. Oh, dude. Do you think that the pepper spray was flavored? Oh, you think it was Doritos flavor or not? Do you think they picked one of those sauces? The guy went, ah, Asian zing!

The guy screams, what do you want? Which flavor? And then he just ticks it over before he blasts you in the face. Jim and jalapeno! Carolina Reaper! He's taking the blazing challenge. We learned a lot. Yeah, I don't even know where to go with that.

Yeah, so like what the fuck is a beat-up security guard in general and then whatever it is that guy clearly did not meet the standard right i don't think i don't think this was this guy an actual employee or did he just show up and start being like i'm the security so this is like i had to like i had to dig deep to like figure out what exactly it was he worked worked for a security firm, and then they contracted out to Buffalo Wild Wings, so he was the security officer at the Buffalo Wild Wings. But he did not have a private security license, so I don't know how he could continue to be employed

by the security company. And he had an open criminal case against him at the time of this pepper spraying. Oh, I got news for you. He's got two now. Because there's a lot of babies out there suing. Don't come in and try to order wings if you don't want to get sprayed.

This guy probably was going to his security guard job where he was not officially licensed to do it and going, these snowflakes. But no one was talking to him. It didn't make any sense. He was probably fired months ago. They just never told Buffalo Wild Wings like, this guy's not going to show up anymore.

Well, Buffalo Wild Wings didn't do anything because no one showed up there either. So the guy was guarding an empty restaurant. That's why he got peppers but he was like, you don't belong here! Burglar! He must be after our money. We're swimming in it. That was Nick

just going, I bring my son here to see owls. To see owls. Oh, my God. Those are the facts. How long we been going? About a cool 35. Yep. What?

Yeah. We're cooking. Are we ahead of schedule? Is that your what? I honestly don't know. Usually about this time I look over and we're about 45 minutes in. No, this is about fair. Maybe a little bit ahead, but we got to get into the-

I don't know what we're going to spit silly about. I mean, we don't have to. We never have to spit silly. It just does. It happens. How can we wet our whistle and not spit silly? What I'm saying- We're just all wet.

Where's the spit going to go? I'm always wet. That's my secret. Are you trying to say something, Eric? Yes, I'm saying that if we continue with the sheet, I think there will be plenty to spit silly about. That's what I said already. I know and I'm just trying to reiterate your point. I- well, I just assumed it was a lost cause on this guy. Yeah. He's here physically, but in his mind, he's off building a desk somewhere.

Both of the Wild Wings, Doritos, Flamin' Hot Nacho Flavored Sauce. Oh, boy. Featuring a colorful blend of a blooming tart and floral essence and a sweet strawberry flavor. Hang on. It did? Oh, no. Definitely this is part of why spit and silly might be a little spit and silly.

That's wrong. You've got the wrong description. I'm just reading the description for the Doritos Lemon Hot Nacho Flavored Sauce, Michael. Featuring a colorful blend of a blooming tart and floral essence and a sweet strawberry flavor, this new treat is packed with unique flavors, dried cranberries, dried strawberries, and melting white chocolate chips. Doesn't this sound a little familiar? It sounds almost like something we

didn't have. So I will say... What time do you think Eric wrote this? Well, okay, so I had it. Also, why is he using the template from two episodes ago? Not a food we never got! I woke up, and then I went to also, why is he using the template from two episodes ago? A lot of food we never got! So I woke up and then I went to Blaine's.

I had to write this. I went and I got a haircut. It's a month ago. He was talking to his barber, Barbara. Barbara. My barber. Damn you. Hi, Barbara.

This is why he was in a mood because he knew we were going to get to this point that's um we move on to this what are we going to talk about don't worry Jordan I've got you covered what do you have to say for yourself defend yourself but like

it's even worse it's even worse because the title's right. He actually went in there and wrote Buffalo Wild Wings Doritos Flamin' Hot Nachos Flavor Sauce and then left it there. Here's what I think he does. I think he just

highlights from the website what it is and he knows where he needs to put it. He needs to put it at the top and he needs to put it over here under the press material. And's what he does and then he's like ah well that's done let me say and then he starts jumping around a whole bunch let me say the beginning of the description i do remember reading and think and not getting not reading the whole part and going i got that i got about a colorful floral of rubies. Tart and floral from Doritos? I got to blooming and realized

that something was amiss. Yeah. You said blooming tart. Really? And I'm like, what? That's the part I got to and I went, yeah, blooming. Yeah, I got it. Okay, so more of a cool ranch. Good job, me. Great work as always. So do you have the press

material? Well, have the press material? Well, there is press material here on the back. There's actually two press materials. Okay. Oh, God. Quote. Yep. We're excited to bring the Doritos and Buffalo Wild Wings collaboration back to fans with a new Flamin' Hot Nacho flavored sauce that's sure to take our exciting partnership to another level.

What level can they get to? It was in all caps. It says, Kaio Correa, that sounds like a baseball player, senior director of marketing, Frito-Lay, because he works for Doritos.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Gotcha. I thought maybe BWW was. Mm-mm, mm-mm, mm-mm. Anyway, our fans know that Flamin' Hot is more than just a flavor. It's a way of life. It's an attitude. Hey, you were pretty close. I mean, you were not wrong to what it actually said.

God damn it. Now, they get to embrace that attitude and experience Flamin' Hot Nacho in a whole new way when they're enjoying their favorite wings. Were those your favorite wings, and do you feel like you're living a different lifestyle now? In a whole new way? I definitely have an attitude. Yeah. And also, they keep calling it Flamin' Hot. It just feels wrong. Yeah.

Like, anything Flamin' Hot about it? I guess you just can't copyright the two words Flamin' and Hot. Yeah. Otherwise, Cheetos would have done it already. Anyway. I mean, you even got the N and the apostrophe. Yeah. Right? It's Flamin'. It's Flamin' and hot. Yeah. Otherwise, Cheetos would have done it already. Mm-hmm. Anyway. I mean, he even got the N and the apostrophe. Yeah, right?

It's flaming. It's flaming. It just seems wrong. It seems like I'm an accessory to a crime. You could be a security guard, for all you know. All right, and then the other one goes, quote, Buffalo Wild Wings has the best sauces and Doritos Flamin' Hot Nacho. Do you mind?

The scoffing. Has the best sauces and Doritos Flamin' Hot Nacho brings the best heat. Put them together and you've got Doritos Flamin' Hot Nacho wings, says professional athlete Clay Thompson. Whoa! Wait, you do? If you put together... Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. If you put together Doritos Flamin' Hot Nacho flavor and Buffalo wings,

you got Doritos Flamin' Hot Nacho wings? Well, well... When you take two things and put them together, you have one thing that are both things, says athlete. Yeah, well, according to Golden State Warriors shooting guard Clay Thompson, who's just returned. I mean, he had plenty of time. He had about two years of injury time to try every sauce at Buffalo Wild Wings.

Oh, man. You know, there was really something wrong with this as I was reading it. Uh-huh. And then it really comes together with professional athlete Clay Thompson. Clay Thompson. Clay Thompson. Hey, when you take this thing and this thing. You get the thing. That's what you get.

Wow, that's great. Wow, some real wisdom from the professional basketball player. If you take peanut butter and jelly, you get a peanut butter and jelly sandwich that's out of this world. I wonder, I just got to wonder how he feels about this. Did he have a quote? What did he say? Let's see. Yeah, what's the next part?

I'm excited to be partnering with Doritos and buffalo wild wings on this fiery pairing in what way excited he's excited fiery fairy in what also is this a direct uh copy paste yeah uh he spelled fiery wrong oh that's fun oh it is yeah oh well. Yes, exactly. And I think it's probably spelled correct in the way that he's using it. Much like clayman, apostrophe N. It's fiery, not fiery. Yeah, it's not fiery. It's fire-y. When we were getting the food and when we saw the signage and we saw that stuff.

I didn't see Clay Thompson anywhere. Was Clay Thompson anywhere? I didn't. So what the fuck? I'll be honest. I haven't thought about Clay Thompson in years until I read this. He's been out with injury for a very long time and now he's back to

sucking down Dorito flavors. He's combining Doritos, Flamin' Hot Nachos, and wings. Was this his idea? Is this like a Saweetie thing? Yeah, this was his big brain. He decided, you know what? We're gonna pair these up. I'm Klay Thompson. He just kept saying, I really like Flamin' Hot Cheetos. And they were like, yeah, but we can't do that and he kept saying i'm clay thompson

we know i'm excited to be partnering yes very good clay i mean just sign the piece of paper please yes sign the fucking piece of paper that it says in my contract that i have to write the copy, right? We got to get this deedle out there. Come on. Like the first part where the guy who's from the company talks it up like we're on another level is the most marketing speak whatever. But I got so excited when it was Klay Thompson doing math. Let me read it one more time,

like how a professional athlete would say it in a press conference. Buffalo Wild Wings has the best sauces and Doritos Flamin' Hot Nacho brings the best heat. Put them together and you've got Doritos Flamin' Hot Nacho Wings. I'm excited to be partnering with Doritos and Buffalo Wild Wings on this fiery pairing.

It's so like, why is this this a thing it's the type of thing where i think like arty lang had a joke about like watching like another dunk contest like at the nba all-star break or watching stefan marbury spell spell the word receipt to me that's what this is all right clay thompson we're gonna let you go out here and tell us why this food is good. Hey, you got this? You got this? Boom. It's fantastic.

Ask them to do anything else besides be a professional athlete. Right, go shoot from three. Pull up from 85 feet and just sink in. That's what my favorite commercials where they have like an athlete spokesperson are the ones where they know that they're not good on camera and they don't have them talk. They're just there to be the person that you associate with the thing and they're doing what they're good at and which is the sports but that's why you have spokespeople like jake from state farm that can go on there and be like hey what's up right i can tell you

these things and then right i'm not a professional athlete i can can read my lines. Hey, put them together. He stands near Chris Paul, who's semi-charismatic, and then he can deliver the goods while Chris Paul goes, oh my god, did you see that? And then that's it. It's perfect. And that's why I don't like those Subway commercials, because they're all

athletes talking, and you can tell the ones that are good at it and the ones that aren't. Yeah, damn. Isn't Steph Curry on a. Wow. So Clay Thompson ended up at Buffalo Wild Wings. That seems on par given the two of them. And what they bring to the table. Draymond Green is going to be like, he's hurting.

He just, I don't even know. He's going to end up at Chili's. Oh no. Well, there you have it. The press material. Now all there is is to tell up at Chili's. Oh, no. Well, there you have it. The press material. Now all there is is to tell us about the food. We ate food? Oh, definitely.

Did we eat at Buffalo Wild Wings? Yeah, I was hungry, man. Yeah, we were talking. I was very hungry today. So we recorded this. You kept almost eating. We usually record around, like, lunchtime. So we, you know, it's like kind of before noon.

We get together. Where this is the food we eat. And we, like like a human we don't really have to plan around it we just eat this for food and then today it was like oh we actually had some stuff that got in our way and uh we had to do this starting at like two or three or whatever so by the time you were getting hungry it was like my, my instincts tell me I should be eating face jam right now. Yep. But then-

Starving going into it. Yeah, I almost got food twice. Oh my God. I was like, oh no! It would absolutely ruin the show if I ate something. What did you almost get? I was going to get McDonald's.

Oh, really? Well, it's again, you find a little pocket in your day where you're like, oh shit, now I have time for lunch. And I almost turned towards there and I went, oh, I i have to eat a little while and then you were like as usual we get here or to the restaurant and you're like wow this looks like a pile of shit today something like that and i just and you're like are you excited which is usually a

facetious question and i go i will fucking eat anything right now i'm so goddamn hungry i literally don't give a shit about whatever this fucking crap is right you know and then I had a bite and then reality set in but I was just like I'm not kidding I'm fucking hungry I just want lunch give me the fucking food we're only

reviewing these wings but we also got the cheese curds the fries and then Nick got a whole order of oh they're called curds I thought you kept calling them cheese turds and I I was like, who would order food named turds? I don't know. Dung eater over here. I mean, I saw you eating them. Rolled it into a ball and then ate after it. Dude, that's what I said when we were ordering. If anything is in the shape of a ball or has cheese, that's an order. They can be together or not. It can be a cheese ball. It can be a ball that's not cheese

or it can be cheese that's not a ball. But if you sell either of those things in that with cheese or a shape, I'll eat it. What's this ball? I don't know. It's good enough to sell as a ball. Onion ball. What sides do they have? They gotta have mac and cheese balls.

Any cheese. Any ball. I'll eat. They didn't have mac and cheese balls. They did have mac and cheese. Mac and cheese. And they had cheese balls there you have it and he was screaming for the mac and cheese he got it

he got it I ordered it for him Eric tried to say no I insisted you did insist the waitress came by and because Eric usually orders it

because he's the one that pays for it with the card and he sometimes looks at what we're eating and gets the facts and the press right. I just leave it to him because he knows what we're ordering. And so it turns into this odd thing sometimes

where it's like he's going to order, but also at the same time goes, I guess I'm ordering. When I'm like, well, yeah, why wouldn't you order? You know what we're getting. It's not like going with your friends and your friends ordering for you. It's like, order for the show.

I don't give a fuck. But I do like to take every opportunity I can get to tell the waiter or waitress that he's ordering for us. And that he orders for us. Or like, tell him what we want. And so, I was already doing that. And Nick was like, oh, mac and cheese, mac and cheese. He got yelled at by Eric. He's like, no.

We all shot him down. He's like, oh. So then that's it. Waitress came, took the final order. I go, oh. And he wants mac and cheese. He got yelled at by Eric. He's like, no. We all shot him down. He's like, oh. So then that's it. Waitress came, took the final order. I go, oh. And he wants mac and cheese. And Eric literally goes, no. And I go, yeah.

He wants it. He really wants it. And the waitress stands there and looks at Eric and is like, can he order that? Is he allowed? Picking up on the power dynamics of the group. I think this guy's paying for it. He said no. I don't know if I should put this order in.

But we decided, since we were saving money on the boneless Thursday or whatever. That's what I said. Take that money and reinvest it in the business, which is to buy the mac and cheese. Reinvest in the business. You're not eating dinner, though. No, no, no. I ate about five of these wings before I remembered I was supposed to be paying attention to what they taste like. Not because I was hungry, but because there was not a lot going on there.

Right. Like to me, they smelled very similar to the Flamin' Hot Cheetle one that we had from Applebee's. Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. So it really just seemed like they have the same supply chain. There were no supply chain issues on this one. Nobody sat on a table and talked to us. So maybe my theory is a little rocky. Uh-huh.

But to me, it really just seemed like the same exact thing. It was a darker shade of red, I guess, which I guess is a parallel of the darker red of the Doritos flaming hot. I think these were a little more wet. You think so? I think so. You know, yeah, I could see that. I mean, I can still say they're not as wet as you. Yeah, those were just literally like I punched a bag of Cheetos and poured them on the chip.

There were less big chunks of chip on this. There was one little leftover, just the breading with the sauce on it. That reminds me, they didn't put three Doritos on the plate, though. Didn't they give us two Cheetos? Yep. Fucking wings. It was so you could compare. For garnish.

Presentation. But yeah, so then I started like trying to pay attention to it and it was just like, there's just not a lot there. And I don't know. I think we've eaten a bunch of wings at this point. And I can say that it's not an issue with Buffalo Wild Wings. I think it's just an issue with Buffalo Wings, boneless Buffalo Wings in general. So not a lot going on for me.

I don't know how you get better than that. That is what they are. That is what boneless wings are. Well, it's not a food I enjoy then. Right. No, I'm with you. I'm just saying it's why to me the meat is completely irrelevant and it's just like, what do you want us to roll it around in?

What is the vessel? Yeah. What do you want us to roll it around in? Because this is what they all taste like. You could fuck them up I suppose by under or over cooking them. Just one supplier? Just one guy. Just hand cutting these little boneless wings.

He's pulling all the bones out himself. And then he just sells them by the fucking truckload. Because again like if you're telling someone like these are the best wings there's something wrong with you. They are the same everywhere. It's all about what's on it. And they're cheap, usually, and you can suck them down, and you're drinking cheap beer while you're doing it.

I mean, I think we've said that verbatim about either Wingstop or this very restaurant you forgot we went to. So, you know, I just, I'm going to give it a 35. Okay. I'm slamming it. Yeah. Just not much,

not much there for me. Here's the thing. I'm not disagreeing with you, but I remember vaguely the last ones, and they sucked. I just remember, I just remember they sucked, and I can't rate this lower than that.

And they got a 45. I just, pizza and orange chicken wings, that was shit. These were fine. I wasn't like, whoa, Doritos. I got a little, they smelled more like Doritos than they tasted like Doritos. Definitely. It was like, whoa, Doritos. And then you eat them.

The smell is like, it hits you first. Yeah, and then you eat them, and you're like, oh, okay. Where'd it go? But then you start taking one, and you you eat them and you're like, oh, okay. Where'd it go? But then you start taking one and you just put it on the, you stab it on the fork and then you dump the entire wing in the blue cheese. Yes. And then it's pretty good. Yep.

Yeah, because then it tastes like blue cheese. Correct. So that wasn't bad. And then occasionally you'd go, oh, yeah, there's sauce on this. Under the blue cheese. It's supposed to be. But it was fine. Cheese curds were pretty good.

They were not shitty. They were not shitty like the other ones we got. The fries tasted like wienerschnitzel fries. Such a unique way for a fry to taste. Yeah, it was very weird. The mac and cheese was fucking cheesy. That shit was thick.

I described it as if they made the mac and cheese by taking an entire block, maybe even a wheel of cheese, and then shoving some macaroni inside of it, and then cooking. Because it was the thickest mac and cheese I've ever had. It came with the buffalo... Oh, the chopped up buffalo that Nick was raving about.

And so was Eric. It's just the best buffalo sauce of any place. I just think that your friend Frank made them or something. It's because it best buffalo sauce of any place. I just think that like... Your friend Frank made them or something. It's because it makes it taste not like the way that the rest of those wings taste. That's true. Like those were wet. Right.

And that's where... Yeah, exactly. But these are just dry. But then I tried it and was like, all right, let's see what it's all about. And if this is good, like it's not bad. I don't like get disgusted at it. But it was just like, I guess it's just not for me.

I'm not a Buffalo Wild Wings guy. Just like Ambulance isn't the movie for me. We talked about the clip that Eric did. It got 45. What did you give this one?

35. Okay, I'm going to give it a 56. Quick math. All right. 45.5. Nailed it. Way to go. Nailed it. That was some good math, Michael.

Huh? I didn't even use my phone. Can you imagine being like, can we pause the recording? I'll do the math on this. I would absolutely not pause the recording. I'll do the math on this. I would absolutely not pause the recording. We'd waste the content. The duality of our personalities really came through in the discussion of the movie Ambulance. Oh, absolutely.

And the clip that Eric shared where it convinced you to buy a ticket to see it. And it confirmed for me that I would not see it. You were having a conversation about a clip that you had not known that I saw. It was something Eric reposted and Jordan, you were like, yeah, I saw that. And you were like, I saw that clip and went, this movie's not for me. And I was like, no joke, I saw that clip and bought a ticket

for this weekend. And I was like, this is why this show rules. I fucking love it. I mean, Buffalo Wild Wings still sucks. I mean, bubble wine still sucks. I just think it sucks less than you. Right. Exactly.

You just keep going, I don't think I like these restaurants. And I'm going, no shit. Uh, so, now we got a snack attack. Snack!

Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack!

Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack!

Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack!

Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack!

Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack!

Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack!

Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack!

Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack!

Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack!

Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack!

Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Snack! Sn Sandwich was the one who sent the original Albanese gummy bears that we were on the first snack attack. A hero. That's true.

Sent Albanese gummy bears again. These are Albanese sour gummy bears. You know what? I'm glad because I was expecting these are like Albanese covered in dick cinnamon. Because it's always some stupid flavor. Sour is actually normal.

It's a normal thing. Like, you take a good gummy bear and you make it a good sour gummy bear? I'm excited. I didn't want him to fuck up the Albanese gummy bears. I see, I see. You know what I mean? Like, covered in cayenne pepper. Oh, they're not very sour at all.

Real low on the sour scale. You're making a face. I don't like sour. Right, but like it or not, these are very sugary. This is nothing. Yeah, it's like... It's not even making my face get squished. Eric looks like his face is being sucked off with a vacuum

that he's then probably going to put on his dick. This is not even close to like a Sour Patch Kid type of sour. Not even close. It's more mild than that. This is the most mild sour I've ever had in my life. Because you look at them and they look like they're covered. It looks just like a Sour Patch Kid. It's more mild than that. This is the most mild sour I've ever had in my life. Because you look at them and they look like they're covered. It looks just like a Sour Patch Kid.

Nothing. You have one tiny little iota of sour and then it just tastes like sugar. And it kind of sucks because I would rather just have regular Albanese gummies. I agree. Give me regular or give me sour. This is weird. This is like diet sour. It's like sugar-free sour yeah i don't like it

too sour all right that's insane you're a little sour mouse my kids eat sour and they dude i'll eat some shit they're eating and be like like my face gets fucking like the thing in your jaw like you know like jiggles yeah you know like atomic warheads and all that stuff that stuff makes me like throw up i hate I can tell by this going in your mouth and you going, it's way too sour. This is not sour. This one tastes like a sour punch straw.

This is like the green one. My mother telling me pepper is spicy is you saying this is sour. That's crazy. I can't believe how sour it looks. Yeah. I'd say this is fake sour. This is fake.

Fake sour, yeah. I would agree with that. It's still a very good gummy bear though it's a good gummy bear but not as good as the original I agree I'm gonna give it a 73

I'm gonna bump it down to an 80 which is still an amazing score it's a delicious gummy bear but if you're gonna do sour make it sour 76.5 that's weird man that's weird

he sent some other ones, too. Maybe it can't be done. Thank you, Sandwich. We'll try those as well. If you guys want to send snacks, you can. Send them to Face Jam. Care of Eric Badour, 1901 East 51st Street, Austin, Texas, 78723. If you want to check out ratings from past episodes, visit Face Jam Stats.

Take two. Here we go. Three, two, one. If you want to get a look at our past ratings for previous episodes, visit FaceJamPodStats.com, compiled by Jammer Tanner C. Thank you very much, and follow at FaceJamPod to stay up to date on everything. Don't forget, our new HomeGoods stuff is out now, and so are the Spice Rat shirts. Spice Rat shirts made a comeback.

Do I get one now? Yeah. You're a big fan of the take two that i know he never edits i mean he doesn't even edit it kelly does but yeah yeah he just he's just the one you ever think about doing a take two on the fact sheet that's always wrong like it just seems like this is a little printed piece of paper right that you could change before you get here right right right uh yeah and it's always wrong uh-huh and you can still edit it on your computer and print out another yeah right yeah then you show up and you're always fixing your hair

and I keep telling you they can't see you you requested your own little microphone booth for some reason because you want your audio to sound holier than ours which I thought was weird you kept saying you want to make it sound like you're closer to him than we are I don't know if that is true

or not like you be the judge of that audio listener but um i'm just saying maybe i don't know i feel like you're the security guard right now and you need to you need to be the one employee working six tables is what we need from you not the person macing people trying to order food at the restaurant no one comes to um right right right right so how would you you rate Eric's performance on this episode? Yeah. On a scalable 100. On this episode?

Yeah. I mean, it's hard because it's on scale for an Eric. Right. Yeah, you got to. Not terrible. We got the food. We did get the food. I mean, right, right, right.

Maybe it's why he does these things. Right, right, right. And it kind of evened out on the press material because even though he didn't have the description, he had two press materials. The problem we have for giving him a rating is we always make him look good. Yeah. So it's hard to take what he gives us, this crap, and turn it into like- We should give ourselves a rating on how we managed to-

The sculpture of David. How we managed to salvage his episode. Yeah, and then I give Eric a hundred that we gave him. Right. We gave him a hundred. Right. And so probably like 17. I'll give you an 18.

Thanks. Average score of 17.5. Okay. So, so if you're in for improvement, so if you're, Hey, go give us five stars.

Don't let the t-shirts win. And under the comments, just write 17.5. That's our secret code. That's a good one. You know, you know, you listen to the end, but that, or you tricked us and you just skip to the end.5. That's our secret code. That's a good one. You know you listen to the end.

That or you tricked us and you just skip to the end because it's always at the end. Or you randomly post numbers and somehow got it right. Well, when you see 15 people typing 17.5, I would just type it too. Just know. So I either want to go with or not go with the rapture. Whatever is happening with the most amount of people, I want that to happen to me too. When you see the episode comments and you see people writing, whoa, and hi, just know that when you write 17.5, you're better than them. At this point.

You're caught up. Don't write, whoa, or hi. You're going to see it. Could you imagine? Has that been happening? Yes. Kind of cringe. Were there highs on the woes? Oh, yeah.

Oh, disgusting. Kind of cringe, though. Damn, dude. Imagine being that person who gets it so wrong. Anyway, I'll be commenting hi and whoa on this episode. You wouldn't be allowed in Hot Topic, and you'll be forever 22. Whoa!

Now do the end. I was trying to figure that out. Rate and subscribe and tell a friend about the show where we eat food and rate the food. Goodbye.