100% Eat - Dairy Queen Eat Along | 100% Archive

Episode Date: April 17, 2025

Our Heroes don't have a Ride Along this week so in its place we have an Eat Along for you. Grab some DQ and have lunch with the gang. Even Graysie is here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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You told this. You told me how long it takes. Oh, so don't make me relive it. What is joining in? It's Gracie she's trapped I Couldn't figure it's Craig. I just just so you know Gracie Eric is freaking out for some reason just got it. It's suck shit What are you talking about? Recording at home sucks blame Jordan blame Jordan with that blame Jordan so what

are you freaking out I just I just got here this isn't even me this was Jordan all Nick I don't even understand what's happening all right well we can't do right along because we didn't get in a car together so we're just gonna do an eat-along yeah are you rolling on your audio for this just in case? Okay good. Oh, are we doing video too? I mean I'm capturing this so don't worry. I got the video. Oh Okay, we'll do a shitty Brady Bunch. Yeah, but plus Craig. Well say hi to Craig. I'm rolling the audio. I went through so much trouble to set up my OBS you piece of shit. Why?

Because I restarted my computer and all that. Okay. Why did I set it up? Because I thought I'd have to record. And he was like, I got it. I got it. He can barely ever play the audio, the intro. That's true.

Why did I think he would have all of this handled? You just said that and you just made him realize that he has to play the audio for us somehow. And he's fucked. Are you also recording, looking for something to do? Start a game or play video playlist instantly. Looks like Krunker Strike is an option. Krunker Strike. That's what it says.

I wanna watch Krunker Strike. That's the seventh window on my screen. Krunker Strike, YouTube, and Gartik Phone. But some people call it Garlic Phone. Oh, that's one. Hey, Gracie, what other food did you get? Just fries. Oh, wow, you really just got fries?

They have good fries. She controlled herself. My lunch. I got fries, but I also got the cheese curds. I considered them. Yeah, I got the spicy chicken Nick didn't know about. Pay attention. I fucked up everywhere, bro. I'm curious why there's different ones at each Dairy Queen.

Yeah. Did you guys know the spicy chicken? I didn't. Yeah. Was there spicy chicken at the one you went to? Eric? I was very I was locked. I saw curds and I was locked in.

To be honest, I think there was. And Nick, see, I don't think it's different at all. Fucked up real bad. Look at that. It's good, bro. Look at that curd, bro. Wow. Well, my OBS is so clean, but the discord is terrible. Yeah, it is. It's so bad. It really is. Yeah, I'm gonna stop recording Yeah, I should do that

Well, I I made the mistake of having a big lunch I met a couple friends Now here's the thing. Where'd you find them? Met a couple friends. Well, I met them I met them for lunch Did you meet them at lunch? Did you become friends with them at lunch? Is that what you're saying right now? He saw people sitting there and he went, oh, new friends. It was a real Buffalo Wild Wings situation. Do you guys like food?

How do we make this video look better? Oh, man. Oh, man. So I'm definitely gravitating towards the cookie one more than the peppermint one Michael I'm very anti naturally. I am my anti mint I Want to eat ice cream? I want to eat ice cream not brush my teeth I'm mad at the peppermint because it spilled all over my car That's true More it's the more melty other do it was in my cup holder and it was going everywhere

I don't even know look how I look how I look. Oh wow Wow You can't turn that upside down. My wife said that's gonna go everywhere. My wife said that the cookie one wasn't nuanced enough It just is it nuanced how I was amy what an interesting thing to say She said it needs like a pinch of salt or something. It's too sweet. I found it. There's just a little bit in it. I appreciate that she gives stronger analysis on the food in one go than Nick has in his 10-year-old. What are you talking about?

What are you talking about? I'll say it's good. Yeah, I'll be honest. I would say, I don't know why you stopped at Nick, because it's probably most of us. Yeah. Yeah, I don't think I've ever described something we've eaten as not nuanced enough.

I usually say, I like it good. It make my tum tum happy. You might hear that. There was a thing on TikTok where people were saying, if you're at Thanksgiving and one of your weird relatives come up to you start ranting about you know one of their racist complaints that they have instead of trying to argue with them or counterpoint them your response should be what an interesting thing to say to me I don't know why but that was my first reaction when Nick described what his wife

said about the ice cream. This ice cream is not nuanced enough. What an interesting thing to say to me. I wish I'd thought to say that to her. Let me know when I get the lighting right. You're a little washed out. Let's see. A little orange now. Yeah, now you're really orange. Yeah. Are you? Come on.

Wait, did you ask, are you sure? Yeah. I'm pretty sure. Are you? No, I'm guessing at it. It sounds like it. I'm pushing buttons, bro. Look.

Now you're like a blue orange. Like a sterile light. That's what I wanna be. Oh, good. Welcome to my surgeon's table. That's exactly what it looks like. Whoa. I like the background of,

Gracie, I like your Christmas lights, Gracie. Thank you, I put them up today. Did you really? Yeah. Wrapped them around the pillar. I put them up today. Did you did you wrap them around the pillar? They don't they don't even know. Well, you don't have that's the magic of you know, the camera work you don't need to show. No. To do

magic camera work. This is gonna look interesting. I put up a tree yesterday. What? Hang on. Magic camera work. This is gonna look interesting. I put up a tree yesterday, too What hang on? Like a real tree or a fake tree The fakest tree you've ever seen. Hell. Yeah, that means like a little it's like a Charlie Brown tree. Oh It's a fake sad tree. Hang on. I've quite the setup here. so I'm gonna have to do some work. Okay. I'm unplugging the mic. Hang on. Oh, that's not a good idea.

Yeah. I don't think it was activated on that anyway. Nope. Oh, it is kind of a Charlie... Oh, that is pretty sad. Oh my God. I think I had that in college. I got it. All right.

Gracie, that's a sad tree. The worst. Apartment tour. Gracie apartment tour. Oh, that's what's happening? That's cool. That's a sad tree. The worst. Apartment tour. Gracie apartment tour. Oh, that's what's happening? That's cool. That's the whole thing. Whoa. Wow. Wow.

I used to have that L-shaped couch before I threw it away. So wait, you had Gracie's couch and Eric's been taking my kids to school. What's going on here? Because this is not making any sense. I don't know. Wait, Nick, did you say this was or wasn't working? This mic. No, it is working. It's going on here? Because this is not making any sense. I don't know. Wait, Nick, did you say this was or wasn't working? This mic? No, it is working. It's not working. I think it is.

I don't want to hold it this whole time, so I have it propped right in front of me. Okay. Gracie told me that she doesn't have a stand because it broke, but she'll figure it out. Oh. Yes, you figured it out. Like it's plugged, the mic is plugged into my computer, it's strung through here and it just doesn't have whatever piece needs to connect right here. Oh, yeah. So I have it all, but right now it's resting right there. Perfect.

Oh, I decorated for the holidays too. Oh yeah? Oh! Tada! Wow. There was already so much red going on that you just added green. Yeah, now there's just a teal also.

I mean one light is red. Nick is trying to switch all of his stuff too. Bamboozled. Look at that! Yeah, Nick is trying to switch all of his stuff too. No, it's plush! Oh no. Bamboozled. Look at that. Look who it is! Wow!

Yeah, it's me. Michael has that in his house. Hey, why the hell? I see how I pick up his kids for school. Dude, Jordan! Why did you two get to stay in the office and Jordan and my head had to go elsewhere? Well, this is highly implausible. Wait.

Is that your Jordan impression? This is a nuance to know. Yeah. I was like. Oh, man. That was. I rescued that. I rescued that from.

So Nick asked a good question. What me and you are mounted in the office. I mean, we're not mounted. I think it's just like some sticky tape or glue. Right, but that was going to be trash. But we're hanging out. We're hanging out. Right, why aren't they? Why isn't he? Yeah.

Because he didn't want to be. Yeah. A real Jordan was like, don't hang me up. And so I hid him for a while. I requested Michael to be. Yeah. A real Jordan was like, don't hang me up. And so I hit him for a while. Oh, I didn't know that. I requested Michael to take it away. Oh, first I hit him. First I hit him in Achievement Hunter. And then I ended it for this. And I said, Jordan can't live here anymore. Where's he going to live? And so then I said, Jordan, do you want you? And he said, absolutely not. Do you want me to leave you here?

And he said, no, I don't want to be used. Take me away. And so it was either trash can or my house and I didn't want to throw it away. So I took it home. And now he hangs out in the corners. Yeah, this really is the best use for it. It really is.

Like if we ever need it, we have it, but people can't fiddle with Jordan as they please only I can just fine because Michael's got a pass Like it's really you'd really just see your foot most of the time in the corner and part of Nick's head And it's the most interactive fun little Easter egg. It's the most interactive part of like the cardboard cutouts so right it's the most it's the most needed one so like getting it out of there before somebody could fuck with it I think oh yeah yeah like for example Jordan Eric and I got Halloween masks put on for Halloween on

ours oh that is yeah no one asked me what I wanted to be. I wanted to be the wolf man, not the swamp thing. But I ever got to be the wolf man. I got to, I got to be the wolf man. You got to be, but then I got you by taking it and then doing a skip with it. I campaigned for it, yeah. Well, congratulations.

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19 plus and physically located in Ontario. If you have questions or concerns about your gambling or the gambling of someone close to you, please go to connectsontario.ca. Did you see the video, like on the day we're recording this, the video we put out today on phoenixgumpod.com, the sour pickle taste test?

No, I didn't. Where? It was a good time, where I trapped myself. I mean, that's 100% serious. It wedged, like in a movie when a monster is gonna kill someone, a giant monster, and they put like a branch in his mouth and he can't close it.

That's what happened to me. And I couldn't get my fingers in there. It was crazy. Yeah. Nobody knew how to help you. I remember kind of just watching and being like, you just figure it out or he won't. There's a part in that video, Michael, where you try to go

get Larry to see what's going on like in your office. And Jordan peeks in and turns around into the camera. He just goes, they're filming whatever they killed a agent therefore. It's so fucking, it's so funny. It's so funny. I said it and then immediately was like, I shouldn't have said that. I feel bad. I feel bad for saying it. I shouldn't have said that.

I feel bad. It was good. Feel like it's not my joke to make. Why? You know what? You know what, Jordan? You get a pass. Hey!

Wow! Well, thank God, finally. Well, would have been handy to use that when Achievement Hunter was still around, but you know, whatever. I like to point something- Too slow, buddy, too slow. I'd like to point something out.

Ha ha ha ha ha. Gracie is dipping her fries in the Blizzard. Yeah, Gracie. That's the only reason I got them. Yeah. And they aren't on. I'd also like- Have you tried gravy? I'd also like to say something at this point. I got two. Yeah And they are also like have you tried crazy something at this point? I?

Got two of each because I had to try one of each and I got one for each of my kids We saw the receipt yeah, I'm pretty sure I I'm eating both of the cookies No Does the peppermint have rainbows in it no Yeah, I'm eating two of the same ice creams. Michael, no! They taste way different! Don't get it!

Relax! I guess that'll... Hang on! Well, this is going to come out after the episode, so it's fine to say that you're eating the one that's better. Also it's not a stretch. Like, I'm with Michael that mint in ice cream does not belong. I like peppermint.

I like peppermint. I like peppermint a lot. Peppermint is just mint in disguise. They're trying to put a word in front of it to make you think it's something else. I like the peppermint one a lot. Gracie, would you dip a chicken finger in your blizzard? I would try it. Yeah, no I would.

Remember when it was a big debate for us and we made a whole bunch of content out of it and Gracie just went fuck yeah Finally some backup I should have got some I Had spicy ones at Michael's I'm so upset. Oh I explained to Gracie today. The Dairy Queen in Texas is different. Oh yeah.

Oh, for sure, yeah. Have you ever been witnessed to a DQ commercial outside of the state? It's totally different. My wife is always asking, it's like, so in other states, did they say like DQ, that's what I like about California? Absolutely not. They don't say anything like that. like DQ, that's what I like about California. I go, absolutely not. They don't say anything like that. They have a real slogan.

There's a DQ app and a DQ Texas app. Yes. Was Jerry Quinn started in Texas? No. No. No, it took a long time. Why is it no sense? Because they just, Texas sucks, that's why. And they're like, we want it. It's because they know how to pander to Texas.

There was a guy, there was a guy in front of me. Yeah. That's what I like about Texas. There was a guy in front of me at the drive-through and he had a truck and I could just see him through his like side view mirror. And he was just sitting there and he was like Like this guy was fucking pissed and I'm just like I bet this guy comes to DQ six times a week

It was just a client like oh my fucking chicken ice cream or like and I'm just like these people ever like this guy right here this angry just like Guy sitting in the drive-thru like that's the lifeblood of DQ. Yeah Make of his his was different if it had less monsters like up in brown rock and he's on my No, she asked several times which blizzard I ordered and I said the two specials and she said, which ones? Mine was smooth. Mine too. I was sitting here eating the ice cream

and it dawned on me, Nick's wife talking about it being too nuanced. No, not nuanced. And I'm just going, I'm eating them going, man, I can't even taste this, I can't taste the peppermint at all. And then I look and I went, this is the same one. I took a bite of this.

It's like you suck it on a sour ball. I was like, oh! It's not nuanced at all. All right. The peppermint is just, blam. Blam. Well, god damn, dude. God, that's terrible.

Terrible? Wow. I feel like I'm a 99 year old man. That's who would order that. Oh, I'm old. It's delicious. It's just, it's fucking little Andes in an ice cream. That's how much I ate of that one. I barely touched this one. Wow. Oh, did I get too big of a one? Did you, what size did you order? Medium. What size did everyone else order?

I got smalls. Did you get mediums, Michael? Yeah, well you're small! That makes sense! At what point does someone get a medium? I'm like 3 inches taller than you. If I would expect Trevor someone get a medium? I'm like three inches taller than you. If I would expect a Trevor to get a large. OK. They don't come in tall size. I wish they made big Starbucks drinks. It's like I I'm tall, so I gotta get the bigger size,

but I'm thin. I wish it was a tall, thin cup. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Whatever size Trevor gets, Alfredo has to get. It's just sort of like, oh man, that sucks. Next time I go to a Dairy Queen or any fast food place and they ask me what size I want, I go, well, usually I wear a medium.

How does it run here our ice cream runs a little small that's good I'll size up it's winter you want to be cozy you know all right we should know where to sleep in exit toast why is it Texas toast because it's bread. It's bread That's bread. I fried though. So I mean this is not yeah, I know This is just fucking toast the lie Is Texas toast fried? It can be Or grill so can anything?

Yeah, I just don't what why would that be the answer? It's the right one. He's not Because when you asked it I suddenly lost all confidence in my Arbiter for what it is and he didn't know oh Yeah, it's right. Oh really well. Let me just look that up real quick Yeah, I'm pretty down You know you didn't expect me to record my audio for this by the way right because I didn't record anything okay cool I got crazy so you know I was doing the video I'm doing it was video and audio and you're like I don't need that and so I turned it off

And then I realized oh, I didn't I know audio now. Just so you know nothing I got correct. Oh boy I don't even know how to do that Just so you know. Nothing. I got Craig. Oh boy. I don't even know how to do that. That's awesome. To be fair, I asked yesterday, and I was like, she has a mic. And I'm like, that's such a basic, that's not at all what I'm asking. I said, can Gracie record at home?

And you were like, she has a microphone. And I went, okay. Oh man. You didn't ask about a mic stand. You didn't ask about software. And you're like she has a microphone and I went You didn't ask about software I don't know that she had a computer I'm so excited. We should end this and go do the actual show because I'm excited to figure out how the fuck We're gonna do that. Let me just like this just like this except no video. Wait, can we have our cameras on? Even easier.

It's more fun. No, we will, but the audience can't get to see it. Okay, good. Why are you, like, are you gonna feel sad if you can't see us like react or what? Well, no, it's just a little more fun. Like whenever we record F***face, I can't see anybody. So I'm like, yeah, that's-

No, it's way more fun. That's why we're better than that show. Just not- It's true. Just not through viewership, but through own self-worth, we're much better. Gracie, I just sent you a doc about how to record audio. Yeah, take that, you. Oh, I'm warm.

Yo, Gracie, I hope you're enjoying your ice cream. I sent you homework. You just have to download something. All right, let's end it here. Thanks for watching. Is there more coming out? I don't know. We'll see Yeah, what do you mean? Is there more coming out? Yeah, what what I meant like this week? What else to keep waving don't don't let up. What is there more content probably? Yeah, how I don't I don't know

There's I don't know. There's anything else that we have. What else do we have? Do you want something? Yeah, what do you want something for you? Yeah, you want to make you want you want something? Yeah, what do you want? I can make something for you. Yeah, you wanna make something? Oh yeah. If you're watching this and there is a video tomorrow, it means Michael made something for us. Hell yeah. Excellent, I'm so glad you set that up. All right, let's cut.

All right, I'm cutting.