100% Eat - Graysie Text Race - Pizza Hut Ride Along

Episode Date: April 2, 2026

Graysie needs to know we got the cinniminis. She messages back in record speed. Jordan could eat all 10 if he wanted to, Graysie couldn't though. She should hire Adam from Laser Team to beat him up, actually. These wings stink and these fries are weird. Check out that TALL shirt though. Get one at https://100percenteat.store Support us directly https://www.patreon.com/100percenteat where you can join the discord with other 100 Percenters, stay up to date on everything, and get The Michael, Jordan Podcast every Friday. Follow us on IG & Twitter: @100percenteat Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This food stinks. It's the wings. It is so strong. Or maybe it's this new crust I'm hearing about. It's not the crust. It could be the new. That could just be what the crust. You think that's what the crust smells like?

They made the crust better by adding buffalo. It added vinegar to my hut box. Yeah, it does smell the vinegar. I did get a hut box. I got a mini hut locks. What comes in the hot box? Probably the stinky, stinky wing. It is the stinky, stinky wings.

And I figured we give them a try. I also got their french fries. What? What? What? I'm sorry. Do you think they're as good as girls? They have French fries.

They do. They have French fries. They have Pizza Hut French fries. Well, you gotta think about like, when you're skiing, you gotta go pizza French fries. So I figured I was trying to teach everyone to ski and go pizza French fries. Don't shake your head, no, that's what it is. It's pizza French fries.

Is pizza's how you stop, right? I've never skied. Yeah. And you definitely want to cross them. Uh-huh, yes. Hey. Because then you turn into a helicopter. Can you do me a favor real quick?

Can you send a picture of the cineminis to Gracie? Oh yeah, I'll do that. Thank you. I was wondering who you were talking. I know, I was like, I'm ready to do anything. I like that you're ready to do anything means hands up so they can be incredibly active. Yeah.

I don't have to waste time doing this. I gotta break the seal. Oh, no. Oh, dear. Seal's been broken. Oh, fuck yeah. How many are there? They just look at, yeah.

Do they look good? Mm. Someone will say yes. Is it Gracie? Oh my God. Where are they from? Did you see they're adding a new emoji that's like the most Gracie emoji in the world?

What is it? The like fish eye. It's like a fish eye lens of like a smiley with like these big eyes. It's like, I just went, oh, Gracie's gonna use that like crazy. Gracie probably already has that as a sticker. Absolutely.

Finally, I don't have to use the sticker anymore. I didn't realize you can put like a background inside a text message now. Oh, yeah? Yeah. And Iris did that for our conversation. And it's like the background of a beach with like a sandcastle and in the like super up close in the foreground

is a seagull with giant like human teeth. Oh my God. Can I ask why? You're not going to get an answer. Yeah, I mean you can ask all day if you want. You can ask a lot of questions. Yeah, yeah. There may not be answers.

I do ask a lot of questions. I get no answers too. Yeah, yeah. Wow, you weren't kidding. Oh, you. It's mostly human teeth. Yeah. That's way more human teeth than I was expected.

Yeah. I don't like that. He's not even missing you. I don't like it at all. Yeah, he has all of them. Yeah, and he's shown off. Do you think? He's flaunting.

This is why they're always going. How long do you think till she replies? Give it under a minute. Yeah. She might be in a meeting. Depending on a meeting. Do you think that matters? All right.

Just tick 1135. Okay, okay. Let's see if she makes it to 1136. Well, hang on. It didn't stand yet. It's loading. Oh, okay. We are, we are cutting him in a

bed zone here. Oh, once it goes through then, she'll respond to the samely. Okay. Okay, here it comes. Dude, I hate this left turn. Is this the left turn? This isn't the one? This is it the one sucks too.

Sorry, I'm sorry. Shut the fuck up. Yeah, you don't know what the fuck is. You're not even going that way because you're scared of it. Yeah. She's already typing. Less than that she's replied. I just had a cinnamon roll this morning.

I did it was maybe 20 seconds. It was delicious. I kid, I kid you not. It was probably less than 20 seconds. I love that her response to her response to was just like memories of the recent time. She ate as synonyl. I have also eaten sin minerals.

What good days. Wow, that was incredible. You should let her know that Jordan's going to eat all 10. Yeah. And he can. Can and will. But really, I won't. And she'll never know.

Jordan said he's going to eat all 10 because you don't know how. I'll eat like eight. I'm so excited to try this new crust. Let's get one of those. Let's get a can of him. Don't you want to get one of those, Nick? Oh, one of the tricycles? Do you want to get one of those?

Oh, God, no. Why not? Well, I can balance. Yeah, you don't have to worry about balance. And you don't have to worry about your neighbor trying to beat you up Alan Richardson. You can just run them over. Yeah, just straight away.

You got like a bumper on the front. You can just run that guy over. I just don't understand. We're going back. It's like going from a bike to a tricycle. What's pissing me off about the Allen Ridge and thing is everybody says Jack Reacher beat up a guy and they should be saying Adam from Laser Team.

Yeah. They should. They really should. Why aren't they saying that? I don't, if people download more, I don't get a check. Yeah. It's true. It might be like 35 cents or something, but you'll get it.

Who would cut you that check? SAG, I think. Oh, really? That's who I got checks from. Huh. Yeah. And then after you see the first one, don't watch it on Tubey. Go buy it.

And then after you watch the first one, you got to see the sequel, even though he's not in it. Maybe he is. Maybe old. Maybe we added him. Maybe it's a trick, and maybe he's in it. What if there's a third act twist? It's like an MCU thing. Wow.

He sits down at the bar. Go check out his early work, and I don't mean Aquaman. Don't watch that. What was the other show that he was? Blue Mountain State. Yeah. That's too early. Go a little later?

Yeah, a little later. Like, in between Ninja Turtles 1 and 2. Yes. Right. What was he up to? What was he up to you then? What movies was he in then? I feel like Blue Mountain State.

is a show. Yeah, he was like, he was like working on, he was taking phone calls like, watch out. I'm not gonna hit him. Okay. They're turning. That!

He turned real slow. He was taking his time turning. Yeah. And boy, did he slam on those brakes on the moment you're head turned. Oh wow. Oh boy. That could have been Adam from laser team.

Hey, we're on the other side of the left turn. Yeah, because he's too scared to face it. Is this the turn? I mean, this turn also sucks, yes. No, this turn. It's fine. This is not the one I'm talking about. This is not.

That was no problem. Dude, when... Over the right? Easy. When we were shooting, Laser Team, we shot all his scenes first because he had less time. Right.

Why? What was he doing? He was going to shoot the Blue Mountain State movie. Whoa. I think he did that right after Lasert team. Nick's scene.

I didn't know they made a movie. Yeah. Well, it's like starting... It's like the rise of fad or something. It was like starring him. Because he was the star of the show, even though he wasn't, and he became...

The star? He wasn't the main character. The standout. Yes. He's the Urkle of Blue Mountains. He took over there. Correct. Yeah. He said, this is my show.

I watched The Oracle show, right? But he was, like, taking phone calls, like, all the time during the movie about, like, that movie. And then he was also talking about Ninja Turtles a lot. Wow, Ninja Turtles. Yeah, he's rap by L. I saw a clip where he said he hated working on Ninja Turtles. He said it was the worst experience. Oh, I'm sure it was terrible.

Yeah. I'm sure it was awful. But I'm sure the paycheck pretty good. Yeah. I sure it was just fine. Oh, Nick thinks it's bad. Maybe. I don't think he got paid enough.

Yeah, probably not. I don't think we make enough money. I don't even. I think most people would say... Yeah, he hated it because, like, what they were doing was bad. Like, he didn't, like, hate the movie. Oh. He was like, he was like...

This is how I would do it. It was pissed at them making it, like, shitty or something. Oh, they kind of stuff. It... No, no, just, I think, like, practical stuff and this and that. Like... Because he was, like, I think he was, like, an executive producer on Blue Mountain State. Oh.

But he was like... He had some sort of... I remember I'm saying, like, I'm not going to do Ninja Turtles, too, unless this stuff gets fixed. Wow. Interesting. That's crazy. So they fixed?

Yeah, so it was all fixed. I don't know. They probably just paid him more money. I think he played. Absolutely. That's what they did. I think he played, he did the mocap and the voice.

Yeah. I think three of them did mocap and voice, except for Leonardo, because that was like Johnny Knoxville or something. I think it was. Yeah. For real? I don't remember the movie at all.

I think so. I never watched it. I didn't know which I was. I think that there was a thing, that interview where he was talking about how he didn't like it or whatever, I think a big part was they did the mocap and they like did the voice

and then they weren't allowed to like go to conventions or like promote like it was a weird thing afterward where it was like well you did this it's Michael Bay I believe you're not attached and it's very strange huh and it was so ugly yes they were ugly ugly turtles

here comes I pulled over to the side Nick good for you that truck isn't for some reason the truck is not yeah the truck is really That truck really does he get standing his round. He's a castle doctorate on the road, you know? That's crazy.

And whoever they're gonna go like 10 to is dead now. Gracie replied in like 20 seconds. Oh, and I was gonna say never replied about the Jordan. Here we go. Now she just did. Are those with y'all right now? Yes. What? I thought that was an old pick.

We did this exact thing the last time we liked. It's true. It looks exactly like an old pick because it's It's just basically the same picture we sent her a few months ago. Yes, live. Says Michael. Live. We're live.

Yeah, Johnny Knoxville was the voice Leonardo. Wow. Weird. Everyone else did the mocap and the voice except for him. Wow, she says, wow, back at pizza hurt. What are you all having? We're about to get pizza hurt all right. Steneminis?

We're ready to get hurt again. What if the crust is so good? What if you guys bite this and you go? Do you number one? Should we go crust first? No. Is that Ruby on the back of that? What?

Oh, it is. Yeah. It was. It was all four of them. It was, yeah, it was all four. And Forrest? No, I didn't see. I didn't see Forrest.

I don't think they made four stickers. Yeah. Yeah, if they made Forrest anything, I'd beat your ass. They don't make sun anything. I beat your ass. Yeah, no, I would just beat your ass senseless. They're going to put them in Blaze Blue or whatever. It's going to be Forrest.

You can tag them in. Yeah. He dies immediately. He is one-inched. I'm pretty sure every character I ever voiced for animation died. I think that's the only thing I ever did for animation. Or is presumed it. That's not true.

That's not true. You played the hillbilly guy in Camp Camp. You didn't kill him? He was died off screen. He did eat a cookie and get like high on meth. Oh, cool. You can do meth cookies? He may have died.

That's awesome. He may have died right after that. He couldn't do many. Damn. Yeah. Your character was just a guy in the town who eats some of the Flower Scout cookies. Yeah. And his eyes get real big.

He goes, I fucking love these cookies, yeah. Then you go off the street. We needed a guy to shout, so. Why not? He probably died off screen. He might have. Maybe he got stung by his scarpie. Maybe not the meth, but maybe he got hit by a car.

Or, whatever. Some health issue right after that. I just did a convention last weekend. People always be talking about Camp Camp. They need to be talking. They love it. They give you that Max Straw. I always like to send Jordan things

when people who do get your stuff. It's always nice to see what people are giving you. It was a good show. It was a very good show. It was probably the best written show that company ever made. You're welcome. I think so.

And it has nothing to do with you writing it and me being the main character. Right. It's a coincidence. It's kind of weird that I never got a writing credit. I feel like I wrote a little bit. Did you add a lot? Is Adlin writing?

I have no idea. I don't know. I will say. It wasn't really so much ad-lib. Michael went off script and that stuff made great outtakes content. Okay. That's good. That's good.

It would be the line and then about like a minute and a half after the afterward. That's not the line is tangentially related to the line. Don't say ad-lib that much. But I'll give Jordan credit, though a lot of it, I would read and go, I would say this. It was very tailored. to me. It wasn't like I'd come in and go, oh, I don't get this at all. That was a fun situation too where like once you were cast as Max, it was just like it became like so much easier to write for Max. Right. Like because you know it works. Right. And it's like, well,

when Michael says this, this will be great. And you even auditioned for David and it was just like, you didn't do a bad job, but it was just like, I just don't know. It hurt. Yeah, right. That would have been hard. It was like against your soul. Yeah, it would have been hard. That was like real. acting. Yeah, it was. It was. I like, I'd come in and you'd be like, all right, you're gonna need a big breath on this one. I'm like, god damn you. This is a one-bron. You could see how long the line is, yeah.

I'm simply trying to dismantle the psyche, blah, blah, blah, blah. Yeah, but I wasn't allowed to say blah, blah, blah, blah. Yeah, you actually had to say the whole line. You actually had to say the lines. Crazy. And then I'm sitting in that cozy chair being like, it's not hard. It's not hard, Michael, just get it right. Really, it wasn't that hard.

coming right for us. Shut the fuck up. What's he talking about? Nick, unfortunately, like, akin to, like, him not being invited to my wedding. He just wasn't, like, involved enough yet to get a character on King King. Oh, man. Yeah, I'm sorry. That's all right.

All right. We're still watching. Ball in Los Angeles. Oh, nice. Great premise. Oh. Ew, yuck, that's what the pizza looks like. Okay, I was looking at the pizza.

So what happened on screen. What the, okay, sinnie minis. Here we go. Got them. Oh, who have been those fries? Look at, I don't know what's worse. The wings. The wings are worse, for sure.

For sure. What are? Those are nuggets. Look at them. Jesus Christ. What the? These fries are terrible. What are we doing?

What are we doing, you guys? That's all good. I quit the show. Oh no, I killed Nick. We got a spaghetti situation. Oh no, I have to update my last choke done. They are literally just potato. There's no seasoning. Okay.

There's no seasoning. Okay. There's new. There's crisp. You guys ready? Well, it's some new crust. New crust. And they feel like they're like dehydrated. Bump, bump, bump, but that's the same crust. No, it's new, dude. Did we get, did you accidentally order same crust?

Did you order classic crust? Nope. There looks like the same. There's a receipt on top of it. Yeah. They tried to go, look at this. Look at this patch. This one patch.

Oh, no. Oh, no. They're not used to it. It's new. They don't got the thumbnail. They don't get the muscle memory. New crust? Oh, there's a fry in my throat.

This pizza looks like a drawing of pizza. Do you think Raphael would eat that? No, because that looks about it. I think Johnny Knoxville would. I did get cupped pepperoni, though. I mean, that's a good decision. I didn't know they had that. There's a lot of those pepperones.

Okay. Well, well. We have to eat that and then we also have to eat these wings that are so fucking wings Well, we each get one on dude. They're so vinegary. You can have mine. Yeah. You tell me how it tastes and I'll say I agree.

Okay. I'm gonna send us to Gracie. Can you open the cinnamon bun and befuddled. Here I'll take that. Oh my god. Yeah right? Yeah they look uh they're swimming. Dude these things are swimming.

You eat with your eyes first, eh? Can I not? Feast. Wow A smorgasbord She said What are y'all having? Boom

This Slop Ask her if the crust Looks different I just don't get Why this is the thing That they've been talking about Like until you eat it

Motherfucker We don't know yet When Dominoes did this The crust looked different It did It did And part of this This looks

This has the same Is it burnt quality That Pizza Hut is always The cheese pizza It looks fucked up Up Okay Well we'll give a shot

We'll let you know Are you gonna eat a wing? All right, wing transition. Michael, let you know if the wing's good. Oh, they're so watery. Without a dip, huh? He doesn't need no dip. Wow.

I'm sold. All right, well, find out what we thought the other day on the episode. Oh, Max. I'm David.