100% Eat - No Eric - PF Chang's Ride Along

Episode Date: November 27, 2025

Our Heroes get a ride with Graysie and Nick back to the office. Eric has to drive alone. Eric does his own ride along. Why doesn't anyone stop for treats? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Oh, do y'all know how to tell me where to go? No, I'm not going to direct. You just, oh, you know what I'm going on. But he can't. Just don't film it, Nick. I'm not filming the thing. Or where's Eric? I'll just follow him.

No, he's gone. He's gone. He's going home. I know, but it has to be up here as the problem. Right. So that's fine. Let me tell it to you. He can just not look at it.

I'll tell it to you. You, wait. Can you tell me? Can you just take a let's go, right? All right. Let Jordan tell. Okay, fine. If you know your way.

Yeah. Right. Okay. So now we'll have an instructional video. If you leave this case, we'll tell you every direction to get to our house. Yeah, yeah, that's not a good idea either, Gracie. Okay, so what are we going to do? I'm going to text it to you and Nick can just not film. I won't film the front thing.

I know you all right. I have faith in you. I know. Okay, okay. Can someone give me a clap? Well, wait, someone has to tell me at least this step. Go right. Go right on it.

We're gonna go south on the big number road. I fucking love us. She went, see. You idiots. You could always not have gone. Go south on the big number road for a while, and I'll tell you where to go. Understood. She's got you. She understands what you mean.

So, so Eric's short. Yeah, big time. Physically? Yes. Yeah. In what other way? I don't know. In cash, in statues.

Yeah, so we all decided. Right back with Gracie. Yeah. We all said fuck here. Gracie met us at the P of Chang's and then we decided we would all ride back for Bracey. Everybody wanted to ride in the fun car. Exactly. The fun car.

Exactly. Where'd you put your leftovers? Oh, I got it back here. We're locking them down. We're protecting. All my cookies and goodies. Dude, it's low-key dark though. It is high-key.

No, it's high-key. We passed low-key dark time. Mm-hmm. All right, I sent it to you. Excellent. Oh, I can't really. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

You could just pull it up. I'm in the middle of the road. No, I know you are. I know you are. Stopping before, like doing this before we were rolling? Oh, wow. That's wait. Shorter than I thought.

Yeah. It was not an option, apparently. We got it. We got it. Did John not hit traffic on the way? What's that? Did you not not hit traffic on the way? We did a little.

Oh, we definitely. Oh, my God. I was in a freaking pile up. I imagine you were taking Mopeck, right? Correct. Oh. You don't have the experience. express lane, do you?

No, but I also don't want to pay for that even if I did. Exactly. They do surge pricing, right? Oh, yeah. Do they really? It's even worse. It could be as cheap as like 50 cents to take the expressway or like $5. The only time I ever take it is like if I'm driving home to Dallas.

Then sometimes I'm like my own. Yeah. That shit adds up, man. Yeah, it does. Is that the expressway? Hundreds of dollars up there or like. No, no, I'm saying like here. So you'll take that once to 45 and then take 35 after that.

Oh, because yeah, I don't get you to 35. Yeah, it's 45 the one... That little half toll road that takes you east to west? 45 takes you across. Yes. Yep, that's where I'm going. Anyway, all of our highways are tolls. Yeah, I think the toll roads out number of the highways at this point, yeah.

Well, we have Mopac, but it has a toll lane and we have 35. Mopac has a toll lane. Please stay over there. Uh, 130, 45. Oh, look at that car! What a car! Woo! What a good car!

Woo! Has anyone ever seen that before? That would be a cool face jam band. That's a really cool car. I think it's one of those electric Volkswagen buses. I've never even seen that before, but it was beautiful. I haven't seen one in person.

Whoa, sorry. Oh, Christ, crazy. I was looking at the man. I also want to know, Gracie, very responsibly, did not drink anything. I did not. So this is just, no, that's not true.

She had a couple Diet Coke. I was just like. I was looking at the van in my review. She had a couple dike coax. She was looking at the radio. She's a hopped up on dike. She's worried about putting the GPS like from her phone onto her car for five seconds. And then hands free.

I was found hands free. The van. The carnival! Hey, watch out. Everyone in the next lane, watch out. She's looking at a carnival. Gracie, don't look at the Ferris wheel. Don't look at the Ferris world in the Ruby Mirror

when we drive fast. Don't try. You will drift the way you're looking. What's the green circle next to it? I don't know. It's like one of those loop roller coaster things. There's no way that's a roller coaster. Wait, it is.

I just saw them go around it. What? It's not a roller coaster, but it's like a loop coaster. There's a man hanging upside down. They, ooh, this many thing when you stick to wall. Oh, God damn. This is in the fucking reflection in the window. In the window.

Well, just blur it out. Just blur it. Oh, just blur it. Also, okay, but also like, that doesn't tell them or we'll take no we don't it's like one of the smallest parking lots in austin yeah what parking lot was that the the one where they but that's like granger don't you know it's where it's where they teach people it's where they teach people how to ride motorcycles i guys i don't know that's hopeful you don't remember what any of that you don't

remember cap city comedy club you never used to hang on a granger you didn't have to go to the ones who get it done green yeah they actually don't just to use their tools Cap City. Yeah, they're in the domain. But I never knew where the OJO was. Cap CapCity, yo. It's actually one of the worst intersections in the city where, like, to get to Anderson from Lamar, you have to, like. Distractor.

Oh, that's Anderson and Lamar. Yeah, you have to, like, get this weird, like, freeway and then wait for people who are on the freeway and then. Yeah, I don't like that intersection. I have been there. Okay, a lot of quiet. It did get quiet. No one cared. I was done talking.

Sorry. Yeah, clearly. I was just getting hit by the high key darkness. I know. Making me tired. I know. Gracie, do you remember that fortune we walked by the way out?

Did you read it? No, I didn't read it. You just pointed out. Why didn't you read it? I was in the bathroom. What happened? Oh, we were walking out. It was a fortune on the ground.

She was like, oh, look. And they just kept walking. Is that the one? Is that the one? That could have been the one that wasn't in the, your pack is up. Oh, fuck. Oh my God.

Just rotate. It could have. It could have the restaurant upon open. Catch. I actually had to check to make sure. I wasn't doing the same thing. Oh, yours is what tipped me off. Someone's wrong.

The first fortune cookie Gracie bit into didn't have one. That's crazy. That could have been your missing fortune. I know, in a way, it was fortune itself. It probably was. And you didn't read it? It probably said you were going to become a super doctor. Why didn't you pick it up?

I don't know. Should we go back? Wait, should we make a mystery stop without Eric? Okay. Oh, yeah, where, where? What kind of thing should be getting? Why? Why not?

Because it's 7.30 at night. Or like a dessert. Or like anything. I don't know, we haven't punked him in a while. How can we pump? He's getting pumped out right now. Let's get a sour balls and then shove him up his ass. I don't want to do that.

I'll do it. Yeah, we'll take care of that. Michael does. I not only will do it, I want to do it. You know what I was thinking you met the other day? How crazy it is that I attended Jeff and Gavin's waxing. Yeah. Oh yeah.

See, you did that. This would be nothing. And I was holding the board. You were. thing I picked up the fortune. Oh! Immediately grabs it. You don't need it while your drivers.

We saw what happened earlier when the car was in you. It was a band and you know it, motherfucker. It was a cool man. She never seen a cool man. It was. Gracie made it point to be like, look at that. Wow, crazy. And then I kept walking.

And I went, well, I got to pick it out. I'm Gracie. Oh, shit. It's my amazing fortune. Whoa. What do I have in store? You will find coming. in connecting with family this month.

Oh! Really? It's Thanksgiving. That's a fortune. That could mean so much. With Mingus. Mingus. You're going to connect with Mingus.

You're going to combine with Mingus. Kymara. Thanksgiving or like the P.F. Change's meal we just had. No, it was definitely that. It was that. Y'all are family. We're the family five. Exactly.

I'm connecting with all my real and my chosen family. And you're having a friend's giving. That's my chosen family. Part of them. And you're having a few family. I'm having a feast tomorrow with all these leftovers. I'm having a feast tomorrow. Her chosen family, be of change.

Yeah. Yeah. I hope you're looking forward to some fortune cookies. And maybe I'll invite Ben for my hop in. Whoa. Wow. Dude. I wonder what he's going to go for well.

You think he's back in town now? I wonder what show he's. No, he's probably, this is a peak time of year on Broadway. You think he made it? Yeah. I think he's super busy. Hence, I haven't seen him in any motion pictures. I think I saw him play a dead body on,

actor you wouldn't see you he's a what he's a Broadway actor not a TV I go to Broadway sometimes and you never saw him I was there two years ago I didn't see him well we were at I hope two years ago shit he hadn't quite why you didn't say made it big yet that's why he winked in me I remember you from the show yeah I only work here part-time for fun in the summer well it's he was he was learning a new role oh the I yeah death of a high Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Death of a pancake. Death of a pancake. Did he serve with that weird-ass Walca menu? Is that when he was our waiter? Uh, was it Wonka? Or was it the green? It was the Wonka now.

Yeah, it was Wonka. Because we also had green something. Right. No, the Wonka one was tough. He's definitely, hot men's definitely the next Timothy gentleman. The green thing was like the witches drink, right? No, I thought it was St. Patrick's Day. No.

No? We had green pancakes. Oh. Oh, it was, it was... Oh, God! She remembers. Mint Girl Scout cookies. Oh, I see.

Oh, I do remember that. She's right. We're right. Sorry for the... It was Mint Scouts. That's Eric ahead of us. No way. We already caught up to him.

Should I honking him? Yeah. Wait, what's this card here are you? Stopping, the light's red. Oh, well, that card is fully went around him. Like, they didn't get a fuck. Well, that card decided to go another way. Can I honk at Eric, or is that rude?

Are you sure it's Eric? Yeah, are you sure it's Eric? Are you told me? If you can't see his head, it's probably, it's definitely Eric's collar. Does anyone know, is that him? You don't know if that license? I don't know that I've tried. I can text her right now and ask if that's him.

Yeah. Are you you there? Where you at? Where you at? How far are you? Honk. Gracie. Eric!

Do it. The moment the light turns green. But we're sure at Sam. You should look at him. I see Eric. I see his gray's. I see his gray's. What?

Oh, he's a real. That's him. That's him, motherfuckerucker! Okay. The second one's green I'm honking. Yeah, do it. Look at him going to nuts. He's coming out of the window.

Eric! Eric! He came out of the window. What if it's some guy who's also named Eric? He's getting that guy. We're all laughing. He's having fun. He's like, you motherfuckers! I'll kill you!

They're laughing at me again! He's gonna come after Gracie like she thought I was when I wanted to get her a free fortune. What are you doing? Oh. That's true. What the fuck? I got scared.

Eric, film this. You know we're gonna be opening these Schwarzen cookies all episode long. Yeah. I know we're not. Someone is. Those are some crinkly rappers. Oh, that's not.

She frog. Wee-wee. We-wee. I'm just waiting for this light to drink me. Me too. I'm getting nervous. Oh, oh, oh, oh, it's yellow. Oh, it's yeah, yeah. Eric!

Eric! More, more! Oh! No! Come on! It's not getting any green, everybody! I'm gonna do it every time we stop. This is fun playing car games. Car games. What the fuck?

What the fuck? Don't tell me. They'll never find us now. now I don't know when they hit for I don't know when it froze what oh that oh wait I can't turn it off now okay okay okay it wasn't work it either it was telling us to turn around right but now there's really no no now they'll never find us grace she will never docks us because she doesn't know where she is sweet number anymore of our old office uh f-14 yeah you got it that's it i couldn't remember it

but i remember gracey yelling yeah oh yeah that's what i meant whoa what's he doing huh he's break checking us what the fuck him up fuck him up dude hit him as soon as he stopped it It's so too wild. I love it. He's running back alone and getting deeped at. This is a great rival. I wish Jill's neighborhood was more spread out so I could honk at him in the house. Oh, that's funny. He fucking took on.

He's going so much best. He doesn't want to get honked again. We're losing him. I want to get you. Closed again. Not the curb. He's racing to like get back in the driveway. Put the door, open the door.

The meek little heart. It's also that three of us have been drinking. Gracie hasn't one driving people. Hey, you see that man? You see that man? Get him! Get him! Get him! Get him! Someone's like weed. Someone smoked a weed.

Hey! Stop! It's probably Eric. Hey! That was a rolling stop! No, that's not Eric. He will not smoke in his car. Yeah, don't even try. Don't even ask him. Don't even joke about it. It doesn't matter if it's Delta. He's still mad.

I'm like, Joe. Do I give him one more? Give more. Give one more. Pull him behind him and do it. Okay. Can I park here or no. I would say, not.

Probably not here, probably not here where you're halfway in the street. How come when he gets out of the car? No. No, no, no. He's going to get away! He's going to drive in the house. Don't hung on him. Yeah, yeah.

No, I don't wait for your neighbors. You'll blast him in the laundry room. But you'll blast him inside the walls of the house. He was nice to get to space. Oh, but it would be so good. Oh my God. What do you mean? What do you mean?

Dude, traffic was crazy. Oh, really? Traffic was crazy. That Nick is going to edit into the end of this episode. Don't tell him I was mad. I wasn't mad. Well, if you believe it, we kept telling her to stop. Oh, wait. You didn't have to bring that.

Oh, yeah, that one, you might. Are we doing that? I don't know. I'm just carrying it. We need taking any food or no. We need the fortune cookies. I don't, oh, we do need the fortune cookies. Okay, then just bring it.

Yeah, it's all crazy. We'll figure it out. Oh, God, it's hot in there. There's a nice ass laundry again. Oh, that was nice. That was fucking funny. Yeah, mine was, my, dude, like, mine was really good too. Oh, hell yeah.

He looked at there. Oh, man, he's got to be struggling. Gracie almost hit a van. No, she was in the car because he was looking at the van. Don't lie. Right, the van distracted her so she owns the car. Tracy got stuck on the door.

Do you guys have a fun ride-along? We had a very fun ride-along. Oh, that's good. That's good. Well... Did you have a fun ride-along? Yeah, I've filmed my own. You can put at the end of this episode.

Wow. And you can see it right now. Wow. Don't watch his part. Turn it off. No! Yeah, who needs them? Right?

You can do... You have a lot of fun driving by yourself. You don't even need your... your friends sometimes and it's uh you can uh you can have fun driving by you can listen to music you can um you doesn't even matter if no one is with you in the car and it doesn't even matter really because it's it's um you can see the site it's dark um but you turn the radio up real loud that's a fun activity you can think about what your friends are doing and wonder what they're talking about that's a fun activity that you can do um uh you can't um you can't um