100% Eat - Spittin Silly - Freewheelin

Episode Date: January 9, 2024

Our Heroes are back from a holiday break and decide to catch up. Michael is jacked but ate WHAT?? We also talk about Face Jamuary, Jamsgiving, and our Sauce Monkey vinyl toy releasing January 26. Support us at facejampod.com Sponsored by Katos Koffee http://katoskoffee.com code FACEJAM10 , Shady Rays http://shadyrays.com code FACEJAM , ExpressVPN http://expressvpn.com/facejam Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Offer ends June 30th, 2024. New eligible clients only. Complete criteria by August 30th, 2024. New eligible clients only. Complete criteria by August 30th, 2024. Visit rbc.com slash student 100. He has it. Welcome to Spittin' Silly, the Fortnite podcast where anything can happen, and it probably does. And boy, does it. I'm your host, Jordan Sweers, alongside my co-host, Michael Jones.

Michael, what have you been up to lately? Dude, honestly, nothing. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Here's Mike. It's the holidays, man. Here's Michael. Yeah, you just sit on the couch.

I used to do so much. I used to go on adventures. I used to have stuff happen, and now it's just same old. Yep. Every day. Boring. Boring. Wake up.

Tonal workout. Barely. Barely even use the thing anymore you know what i mean oh have you reached the part where this is just self-sustaining you know i got i got these abs they're self-sustaining you know how you know uh you know how michael phelps has to eat so many calories because he's just constantly burning them so so if he didn't keep eating, he would just get ripped? Yeah. Constantly?

Yeah. It's kind of like Deadpool. It's just constantly revealing himself. Michael Phelps is kind of like Deadpool. No, no, no. He's saying I'm kind of like Deadpool. Oh, I thought you were kind of like Michael Phelps. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's funny. You're annoying. What? Sorry. So I am like Deadpool. Can you say Jimmy Jungus? It's funny because I had essentially that exact situation today you're describing of like eating to replenish. We went, I went to HEB for lunch.

I walked over there with a couple of people and I bought. Which kiosk did you go to? No way. You went to the cold counter thing in the front. Buy all the food kiosks. You just picked up a turkey peppercorn sandwich. Knew it.

There's so much protein in turkey. You were just talking about that not too long ago. Large tuna fish sandwich. Did you eat both? No. Jesus Christ. I got pasta, I got rigatoni,

and then I also got fettuccine Alfredo. He did eat both of those. As a elder, I decided what I wanted to eat, because I'll just be like, what do I want to eat? But on the walk back, I ate the whole peppercorn sandwich. Jesus Christ to atb back well that's that's and i was like i'm i'm burning off calories i gotta eat more i'm walking to atb i'll do that with like i guess when it was halloween and we had leftover candy yeah i would like i'd be like oh i'm going upstairs

and i want to take some of these candies with me. But I'll grab a little extra for the walk upstairs because I'm not going to sit down and have no candy. Yeah, that's, what am I, stupid? When you... And I'm walking it off as I eat it. It's a zero-sum game. I'm going up the stairs. Those calories are burned.

When you eat, there's Face Jam eating where we're reviewing it and we're eating like this crazy food or whatever do you still is there like eating for pleasure for you still

he ate that he ate a turkey sandwich yeah but that was he loved it but when I said oh that turkey sandwich he went 40 grams of protein

like there's the thought of like what are the macros you can be utilitarian and you can be yeah I just wonder I rarely

do I ever think of doing both at the same time like Panda Express chicken teriyaki is amazing for you and delicious that's a big check, that's great this sandwich I wouldn't choose

to eat it over a disgusting cheeseburger I would like the disgusting cheeseburger but also it's a turkey peppercorn sandwich have we done the mac it over a disgusting cheeseburger. I would like the disgusting cheeseburger. But also, it's a turkey peppercorn sandwich. Have we done the macros on the disgusting cheeseburger? It could be worth it. See, I don't care about the macros. I just go, don't eat slop all the time. Just eat slop sometimes.

And that's how I allow myself one Wendy's a week. That's it. Well, I'm like that, but I do like five. I was going to say, you're at the bottom, and he's five rungs up the ladder looking down at you going, come on up, buddy. Somehow it's still working.

Yeah. You see people online who think you're on steroids, but really it's just you work out and it's that. The watching what you eat minimally. It's that and it's consistency. I never stop working out. Yeah. But not to the point of like i don't think about like i gotta do that i just like

gotta wake up gotta brush your teeth gotta work out yeah i don't even think about it and it's i went to new jersey didn't work out for a week for eight days oh wow but also it shows i know that thank you i know that uh that makes no difference at all you can take a week off that's it most most times in the span of like months or year or like a year, like you should take weeks off. There's a whole week of rest. So I was like, yeah,

whatever. Like I, I wouldn't have taken eight days off if I was still home, but I'm like, yeah, whatever. I'm not going to worry about it. I got home.

And the next time I exercised, I like obliterated my PRS. Wow. Really? It's the longest I have ever rested. Oh, so everything is a machine. So have ever rested since I got the machine. Because I got like eight full days of rest. So the lesson here is

maybe you should be resting more. It blew me away. Because it's like, I'll work out. I'm never like, oh my god, I'm so exhausted. But the difference of being like, I guess I've been at like 90% and not 100%. Wow. It was sick. And then I had a leg day and I was like, maybe that'll be really cool too. And it wasn't. Oh no. I didn't blast PRs%. It was sick. I was like, maybe that'll be really cool too.

And it wasn't. I didn't blast PRs. It was terrible. The upper body day was cool. Wow. I'm learning a lot. I woke up at 2am because my sleep schedule is off.

It's like I described it as I'm readjusting. I thought you were sitting on the couch. Yeah. Oh, okay. Yeah. Just for a long period of time. Bringing in the New Year and then staying up.

Yeah. Well, I was sitting on the couch dressed like Al Capone, but I was still there. Paper towel tie and everything. But I described it as like when you come back from Australia and you have to reenter the time zone. It's never like one day. Right.

Well, you know, when you when you go there, you lose a day. Right. But then you come back, you get that day back. Yeah. It's like, I don't know what the fuck day it is. Right. So yesterday I woke up at or sorry, the day before I woke up at 10 p.m. at night. Jesus.

And then just stayed up until last night. This morning I woke up at two thirty. So. at night. Jesus. And then just stayed up until last night. This morning, I woke up at 2.30. So I'm like, tomorrow, I'll be done. Tomorrow, I'll be sick. I'll be normal. Yeah, you'll be good. So I was up at 2.30, wide awake. I was like, I'm not going to go back to bed.

Yeah. So I was up to like 6.30. I started getting tired around 6.30. And right before I went to bed, I fucking ate like 12 Oreos. Whoa. I mean, I just, I didn't give a fuck. There was no like, I shouldn't I went bought Oreos like a week ago. I hope we still have

them. And I looked in the pantry and we did and I went I'm going to eat as many as I want. And I just kept eating them. I didn't, it was an extra large thing. Your thought was? It was an extra large. My thought was nothing. I want food right now. Right, eat until I don't want anymore. And I wanted a little sweet. It was like a extra

large thing i ate one quarter sleeve like the entire sleeve i wonder how many oreos i could eat without even trying like without putting a number on it yeah just eating until i don't want anymore i've never done that for for me three and it would make me feel like they oreos give me a headache oh i don't know what i don't know what it is. It's all the natural and real. It's all the natural flavors in the Oreo. It's from the

Ori tree. You go and they pick them. I must be getting the unripe ones. That's what it is. You're getting the vanilla wafer ones. They're terrible. That's why you gotta eat them fresh. That's why Michael was concerned. It wasn't that they were still there. It's that I hope they're still fresh. Ifer ones. Those are terrible. That's why you gotta eat them fresh. That's why Michael was concerned. That's why I was concerned. It wasn't that they were still there.

It's that I hope they're still fresh. Yeah, I kept grunting and just eating. Vanilla Oreos, I think I get down like what he's talking about. Like, I think I could do that. But regular Oreos, like, make me feel sick. I don't know what it is. I think that's a you thing.

I've never heard that before. I love Oreos. I don't know. How many do you think you could eat? You said you ate 12, Michael? I probably ate 10 or 12. Yeah. The concern on Jordan's face I don't know How many do you think you could eat? You said you ate 12, Michael? I probably ate 10 or 12 Yeah The concern on Jordan's face

While he thinks this over is great You dunk it in milk? Oh, no, no I was just consuming it I said I ate I mean, he's right I don't like that sentence

No, he's right Especially because they were fresh And they're like not They're like nice fresh cookie You know, you know you get you get old Oreo cookies and the cookie's a little bit dry yeah yeah yeah

you get them fresh fresh right fresh from the package yeah I think I could go six or seven before I started feeling it in my stomach see that was I should stop

like yeah I not to say I ate 12 and went I ate 12 and went I should stop here yeah so I probably I mean I probably could have eaten 20

without thinking about it damn uh which is insane dude i've never been like a cookie you know what i mean like no that's what's so if you just down and go hey 20 or you don't eat sweet shit it's like that's just not your shit i went they're just sweet enough i went home uh to jersey's first time i've been home like since last year for christ. And, uh, my brother, who's like, uh, just like a big fat piece of shit.

Like me, uh, like you used to be like, I used to be. Yeah. Right. We're just like, and he's just like,

I'm going to fuck like, I show him. It was like, even, even, even going to even, even like years ago, me starting to work out,

but I work out and he was like, yeah, I don't fucking give a shit. Hell yeah. That's my fucking guy. It sounds like, so it's like, that's the perspective we were he was there uh at my family's house and it was like the first day in my mother always has fresh deli meat because she makes me salami and cheese sandwiches because I walk in and I was like so uh where's my sandwich the whole time I'm there I just keep asking for

sandwiches and it gets my wife very upset because they're like, don't baby him. And I'm like, my mother will be like, fuck you. Yeah. All right.

Here's your sandwich. Yeah. Perfect. Lindsay hates it because I get what I want. Yeah. But I was telling my brother, if anyone's going to like baby you,

it's Denise. I'm the baby too. Yeah. You know what I mean? Yep. And anyway, so I'm just like, I'm going to be eating a lot. It's like the third day there.

And my brother was like, you're not fucking kidding. You just eat all the time. I'm like, dude, I had like 15 bagels while I was there. Holy shit. Good bagels. They were amazing bagels. That's like two bagels a day. I gained eight pounds. I gained eight pounds. That gained eight pounds in a week.

That's fucking crazy. Wow. Wow. Holy shit. I know I said it earlier, but it doesn't show. I know. I know, dude. I gained eight pounds, and I think I've lost like five.

Wow. It's just. Goddamn. You're just like Brad Pitt in Ocean's Eleven. You're eating in every scene. It's weird going there eating and having other people go like, there's Eleven you're eating in every scene it's weird going there eating and having other people go like there's a lot of carbs in that I'm going it literally is not gonna matter

and I'm not like I'm not like manifesting I'm not like kidding myself I'm like it's not gonna matter because I haven't hit the wall yet it doesn't make any sense like I haven't stopped using the machine enough and I also haven't plateaued

So I'm just going whatever So I was right You are this self-sustaining Machine I think if I keep going I think if I can make this a little bit More efficient I could make

Or I would be renewable energy I'm not exactly sure how it works But we're getting close to it Are you fusion? Not yet make or I would be renewable energy. I'm not exactly sure how it works. That's pretty special. But we're getting close to it. Are you fusion? Not yet. Have we cracked it? You're so close.

Not yet. So close. Are you putting out more energy? What I'm doing, Jordan, is like I'm the experiment halfway through the film where it's 98% and I'm like,

shut it down. Oh, yeah. Yeah. That's where I'm at now. But I keep eating 20 Oreos, so that's that last 2%. It's when I, dude, it's been months ago. I think that's how Half-Life starts. Months ago, just reading.

Months ago, reading stuff about, like, body fat percentage of just, like, it's just, like, on average, like, what does that look like? Of, like, never exercising to the level. Right. You need to be, if someone says, what's your like on average, like what does that look like? I'm like, like never exercising to the level. You need to be, if someone says, what's your body fat percentage? And your answer isn't like 15% or less, then it doesn't matter. Right. You don't even like, what's your body fat? I think it's like 83.

You know what I mean? Like you don't, you don't know. You can't tell. And I just remember looking up shit. That's like, if, you know, like if this is the percentage you're looking like, you know, you could probably get away with eating some of these foods and whatever. And it's like if you're at this percentage, though, like one slice of pizza for you is about enough. And I'm like, literally, I eat an entire pizza by myself. I don't know what this is.

Like thinking about it now, like looking back on it i went not for me i don't man you can take the slob michael out of the body jordan jordan it couldn't happen to a worse person you know what i mean that's the most frustrating it's not just about the way it's not just about the way you eat but it's like it's it's your Michael personality where you're just like, take a picture. There's some guy putting in way more work than me to get way less results. And he got fucked.

You go up to blame, you're like, now we're like brothers. But you go up to your actual brother and you go, uh-uh. I'll tell you what, this same, this same brother, I got there the first night I was there,

my mother was there and I was like, can I take my shirt off? I'm like this, you like seeing that? And then he took his shirt off and I go, and I go, wow, look at the different people you made.

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and its official partners, Air Canada and MasterCard. What was the best thing that you ate when you went back to Jersey? Hoboken pie. White Castle. Oh, really? He sent me pictures. I forgot about that. He sent me pictures of him and Lindsay at White

Castle and it's Lindsay holding a briefcase full of White Castle hamb it's Lindsay holding a briefcase full of White Castle hamburgers. Well, those are only like five real burgers. But it was like seeing it was It's insane. It was like posing.

It was not just me taking a picture. No, it was hanging out in front of White Castle. I sent Eric the selects. It was so good. From the photo shoot one one was like Lindsay standing outside like looking and I said waiting for the dead drop because they're in like a long black coat

the deal is done I mean it really is very cool that's what like they're protecting in Pulp Fiction is just a brave case for like it inspired us to begin talking about The Sopranos. Really? No, I'm saying you. Did we start talking about The Sopranos

right after that? Yeah. It's a conversation with Eric. Oh, that's right. That's how they all end. All I want to do is talk about The Sopranos. They always find themselves with The Sopranos. Yeah, it's great. It's exciting. We've never done White Castle on the show, but it's because there's no one here. There's exciting. So White Castle. We've never done White Castle on the show, but it's because there's not one here.

Yeah. There's not any small burger place here. Like, there's not even. Small burger place. There's not even a crystal. Small burger place is a pretty good place, dude. Yeah. There was that.

When I lived in Georgia, there was crystal. What? Yeah. That's garbage. Fat City? Was that like the little slider burgers? Oh, yeah. Rest in peace.

The little one that's like a dog bar. Oh, it's closed now, huh? They're at sign bar. I forgot about that. Oh, you know what? You know what? I realized why Castles are fast food.

Like all the food's great there. Like the shit I'm going to eat but I'm a monster. Yeah. So I know I chose fast food.

Yeah. Only other thing I would say, there's a pizza place I went to that I sent you pictures of that I used to go to

all the time after work or like during lunch at my old job in the real world and it was called it was called strawberries pizza and pub fucking amazing i sent eric a picture of the wings and the cures light i was drinking oh yeah it was it was awesome it was it was just pictures from like inside of there it was cool and then later i got a walk

through of where he used to go yeah it's just like some little shithole. It's like a little shot. You gotta start sending this to the FaceGM thread. This electrician thing, and it was just like, man, it was so... Here's the pizza, man. Oh, dude. Dude, look at that. The pizza...

You can tell that was made with Jersey love. By which I mean hate. You know, yeah, yeah. Absolutely. You know how anytime we have wings, it sucks. It's like, yeah, whatever. And I was like, I don't care. I will always get boneless. I don't care. Unless they, yeah, yeah. You know, anytime we have wings, it sucks. And I was like, I don't care. I will always get boneless. I don't care unless they're good

bone-in. These are the exceptions. These are the bone-in wings. He was winging it. Dude, they're so crispy. They look very crispy. And they're spicy, too. It's a dry rub. We gotta post these photos. We'll post them with the episode. This is what real food looks like. Here's my cures.

Yeah, he was drinking a big style. I don't know if you could tell, the TV, to post these photos. It is. Yeah. We'll post them with the episode. This is what real food looks like. Here's my cures. Yeah. He was, he was, and drinking a big style. I don't know if you could tell that the TV, the commercial was on about the wrestling movie

where they all die. Oh, oh, I saw it. The wrestling movie where they all die. Yeah. And I went,

Eric's going to love this. Spoilers. Spoilers. I sent Eric a series of these and he said, you're in heaven. Yeah. Oh dude,

it was so, everything about it is, it's what I wanted Austin to be when I moved here. I wanted it to be the Midwest or the Northeast, but unfortunately, it's just Texas. Dude, I haven't been in this place since before the pandemic.

Every time I go home, I try to go there because it's like 40 minutes from my brother's house, but I'm like, I live in Texas now. 40 minutes is nothing. Before, you'd be like, you'd be like, that's going to a Carl's Jr. from here. Right, exactly.

That could get us to the first Chuck E. Cheese. The first one. But like, the fact that, not just since I've moved in 2011, but post-COVID, like everything, the place is still there. It's fucking exactly the same.

The food is just the same it's just amazing oh and when I was leaving uh a fucking like I never went there regular enough to like know the people like not like oh I know the employees or whatever a fucking fan works there now too really like that's like that's like five minutes from my house

like where I used to go to that place I was walking out and he's like oh hey he's like big fan and he's like and he gave me a he's like, big fan. And he's like, and he gave me a to-go box that was not from my food. And he was like, grab some extra slices in the back. Yeah! And I was like, awesome. Now we're talking. It's strawberries,

pizza and pub, or strawberries, pub and pizza. That's fucking cool as hell. And you know why it's called strawberries? It's on Strawberry Lane. Uh-oh. I thought maybe Daryl Strawberry. No. No. No, it's just like a location thing.

Or it's not, and that's a crazy coincidence. It doesn't have anything to do with it. The street is named for the bar. For the bar. So you build a bar, build it, and they will come. Think about it. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Eric kept saying, I'm coming, but he kept spelling it weird, so I didn't know what he was saying. I kept going, what do you mean? Yeah, when do you get here? Hey, let's talk about our Face Jam sauce monkey. You were like, all I want to talk about is... I want to talk about these guys. So it is Face Jamuary, and we're putting up a new old video,

I guess, every Friday on our YouTube channel. A couple of ride-alongs, some stuff that we've done that's just, you know, for our first... We're just trying to whet the appetite, give them a little taste. Yeah, we want you guys to see... First one's free.

That's fine. It's just Jeff's cards. And then... And then... First... The first next one is not free. So you go to facejamppod.com slash first, and that's how you sign up. Whatever. What are we plugging?

What went up? Face Jamuary. So we're going to have a couple of- What video are we trying to get people to trick them into giving us money for? What are you saying? We go to YouTube. Our YouTube. Oh, I thought I was going-

We're going to YouTube? We're putting some ride-alongs up. We're putting some crazy videos up. You can stream on Twitch and YouTube now. It's fine. We can do whatever we want going to YouTube. We're putting some ride alongs up. We're putting you can stream on Twitch and YouTube. Now it's fine. We can do whatever we want all the time. What I want to do. Jordan is live everywhere.

What I want to do is hopefully if we can get this all to line up on the 26th, I'm just going to call my shot and see if I can make it all work from. Yeah. If this doesn't happen, Eric, something went wrong. How far away is the 21st from now? No, the 26th.

You said the 26th. Yeah. Okay, so you're calling your shot. I've done countless, innumerable live streams where you called your shot four minutes before the stream started and you were wrong. No. Just saying.

I don't think so. And then one minute before the stream starts, I go, the shirts are up. And you go, I'm going to quit. And I meant it every time. Four minutes, 23 days. Who cares what the difference is? On the 26th.

It's just more time for things to go right. On the 26th, to round out Face January, I want to do Jamsgiving. And with Jamsgiving, I want to release these guys, our Sauce Monkey vinyl toys. We will be Jams getting your money. Everyone an opportunity to give us their money. We'll post some pictures of these guys. That's better than money. We'll post some pictures of these guys. It is, we decided a while ago

to make little vinyl toys of the monkey. Yeah. Look in freak mode in some shorts. Dude, he's going for it. It's the shorts and it's the white socks with white sneakers. Yeah, he's gonna get sauce all over this. Everywhere.

He's gonna be, he's messy and he's eating with his paws, which are his hands, because he is, again, a man. He is a man. We have three different ones where he's eating with his paws which are his hands because he is again a man he's a man um we have three different ones where he's eating three different sauces and they have different shirts on each so it's a blind box figurine by and uh on the back it's different shirts i love these little guys they're great for desktop stuff yeah so it comes in a little

it looks like a bucket of spaghetti. It does look like a... It looks like a spaghetti bucket, but it holds a little monkey figurine. And there is still more room if you want to put spaghetti in there on your own. Once you remove the monkey... Oh, yeah, like a little to-go spaghetti. You can fit plenty.

I mean, it's bigger than, like, a medium takeout box on Panda Express. How do you take your spaghetti to work when you make spaghetti the night before? Fill up your spaghetti container. Yeah, you get your spaghetti to work. When you make spaghetti the night before. Fill up your spaghetti container. Yeah, you get your Chinese food spaghetti. Yep. Every time I say, give me the spaghetti,

and they're like, sir. So on January 26th, we're going to release these little figurine guys, and we're also going to do Jamsgiving to round out Face January. The sauce is so nondescript. Yeah. They're just different colors.

It's yellow sauce and orange sauce and a red sauce. Yeah. The red sauce looks like blood. It does. It looks like he's just eating blood. Well, we made it a little more orange to not be blood, but it's still a little bloody. It's pretty bloody. I mean, of the existing colors, it still looks like blood.

The yellow one, thank God one of the poo's in the public domain because the yellow one looks like straight up honey. I was going to say, what we've done is we of the poos in the public domain because the yellow one looks like straight up i was gonna say what what we've done is we heard mickey mouse is in the public domain so steamboat willie so we've done this uh and we have some cool looking little figure guys i'm really excited about these yeah um we've been god we've been working on this for so long i honestly thought they were already out i thought i thought they came and went uh the only reason i know they didn't come out is because as you said we've been working on them yeah and i've just been toiling away hours on it night after night he just keeps saying they're not perfect let me just keep working on it and he has his little he puts he has like a magnifying glass like single eye thing that goes over one eye. And then he's carving from clay.

Dude, that's weird. Nothing has changed from the last time I saw them. Shut up. Right before I went home to Jersey, I stepped on a bunch of glass with my bare feet. What? To prove a point? No, he was doing his diehard impression. I was right.

I kept saying, watch this. Nothing can hurt me. And then you did a backflip on those feet. Yes, I did. You got to film that And then you did a backflip on those feet. Yes, I did. You got to film that video where he does a backflip with Gracie. Dude, long story short, a bunch of glass on my feet. Whatever, okay? Thursday, this is on a Wednesday.

Thursday, I'm like, ow, my feet are all glassed up. Whatever. Friday, that's when I was leaving to go to New Jersey. I'm like, I'm feeling pretty good. Left foot, not that good, though. Still feel like it hurts a lot. Oh, and it's like right on the walking parts. It's not conveniently in, like, the gap where your foot doesn't touch the ground.

Yeah. So I'm just like, oh, man, it's really bothering. So I'm in New Jersey. Six days later, it still hurt. And I went, yeah, there's definitely glass. Yeah, there's glass on that foot. Oh, my God. Yeah, but it already, like, significantly closed at that point.

So I just went to town. I just grabbed an edge And just ripped You mad man Well he's a machine You're not like this Couldn't tell if it helped or not Two days later I went there was definitely glass in there Now it feels great

My mother kept saying let me look To see if there's glass And I kept going nah it'll probably be fine And then the next day I'll be like damn my fucking foot is killing me She's like let I kept going, nah, it'll probably be fine. And then the next day I'll be like, damn, my fucking foot is killing me. It's like, let me see. And I go,

nah, it'll probably be fine. One time I had a splinter in my hand that like the skin went over and I was like, well, I'm never getting that out. As far as I know, it's still in there.

It's, it's kind of like the same thing. Yeah. I just kept, I kept checking every day and I'm like, it still hurts. Uh, and I'm like, it could be glass in there, but it wasn't turning green or yellow. And so I was like, it's same thing. Yeah. I just kept, I kept checking every day and I'm like, it still hurts. And I'm like, it could be glass in there.

But it wasn't turning green or yellow. And so I was like, it's probably fine. Yeah. I kept saying, it'll heal over and then the new skin will push it out. Uh-huh. It'll take some time. That's kind of how that works. It's like, you know how like your dad goes like, oh, this thing just came out of my neck. Oh, I got shot with a BB gun when I was 12.

Like, it's like that kind of thing. It took that long for the new skin to push it. But now're good walking on two feet or you know i've evolved from four walking on two feet dude i was doing a cat style and here we are eric there was there was two events that happened days apart where i shouldn't have been walking and one was stepping on glass oh i can't remember the other one the other one was that mysterious attempt to question mark question mark that was that was suspiciously removed from dude it's so good because it's me going up and then cut and then i'm on the ground holding my neck hold on they yeah they lift that in yeah and it's just me going there's no way we can use that it's awesome they just cut out the part

where you landed on the back of your neck that would make people throw up yeah yeah they cut out the part where i'm talking about glass in my foot and nick is squirming over there nick would be dead yeah they would just die if we put this out. Totally unrelated, but we got to do that video that I sent you guys where the person does like the assisted backflip. Yeah. We have like when Gracie's here,

you want to do an assisted backflip off Gracie? Yeah. That'd be sick. Yeah. I think that's probably what we should do. I think that's awesome. She'll be back tomorrow. We should not sell her.

Some person. I mean, I don't think she's in the text group, so here's what happens. We get the camera place right. We put a big X on the ground. We get her to stand there. Why am I standing on this X?

No, she won't ask to put a big X on the ground, and then in front of the X, put a table with some pretzels on it. Yeah, and she'll lean over and go, ooh, pretzels.

Throw pretzels and a bunch of fucking sour candy. Yeah, she'll lean over and go, ooh, pretzels! Throw pretzels and a bunch of fucking sour candy. Yeah, she'll come over, she'll lean down like that little water bird. We call it Gracie bait.

And then, yeah, we do in the video where I sort of just like, I'd like flip off her back or something. you sort of like, it's like you're about

to ride her shoulders, but then she stands up and you turn your whole body and go backwards. Well, animal instinct kicks in and then you're on your feet. You already know. That woman in the video did it and I'm way stronger than her. That's what I'm saying. So basically, I've already done it. You can definitely do this.

Yeah. I definitely think you can do this. And it's something we should definitely film. And then, I don't know, if I can get somebody else to start tiktok that we can do that because i'm not fucking running another social channel i mean the tiktok already exists i know but we have to talk.com do it yeah you have to go to tiktok.com when's the last time what's the last face jam thing we posted on tiktok because i remember we were we started it and we were just doing pictures. I don't remember that. Well, Eric insisted.

I don't remember that. Eric kept saying, videos don't trend on TikTok. That's what I kept saying. He kept saying, give me a stilly. Take a stilly. He kept saying that.

Face jam. Everyone's looking at their phone now. Because I don't follow them. I'll look at my phone too. Me either. Don't leave me out. Yes, we have one. I don't think we have one. No. I'm pretty sure we don't.

Shut up. I've been watching videos on TikTok of just these big rats dancing. That's pretty cool. They're sassy rats. You gotta include that part. Why? You gotta leave fireballing.

Nick's clapping at something on Jordan's phone. It's a round of applause yeah hey while Jordan's looking up our TikTok can I ask you guys a question oh did you find it? no I definitely remember making it but I can't find it oh it's because it doesn't exist I'm gonna log in so I saw a tweet

where I found it to be universal truth where everyone had a month in their life where they just ate subway oh yeah and uh that's just called undiagnosed depression and uh and i that's true and i did it and then i sent it to my friend and he's like i did that too nick definitely did you have a month i just ate subway i have never I have never. Really? Dude, I definitely I can. I can say for certain I've never done. Like I've never I've never been like gotta have Subway.

But you gotta kind of for me take outside the scope. Yeah. I've never had like Subway like never. But I went to like 14 fast food places every four days. Yes. I just didn't get like the Subway variant. I did them all baby for

some reason i've never done that really with like other fast food places but subway for like a month straight it was just it wasn't like dude i gotta get subway it was just well i mean it's subway again and my friend said the only thing more depressing than eating subway in your car is eating subway inside of a subway oh it was like i think i've only done that once i don't even know if i ever have it sounds miserable the only time i ever do it you got to be like on a fucking road trip or something oh yeah i mean because i don't want to eat like in the car i can't i can't have the whole car for nine hours you know what i mean like subway yeah yeah uhway is just such a as like a disgusting fast food person

Subway's like it's fine it's not dog shit but it's Subway it's reliably Subway and they're all over the place they're everywhere I think the worst Subways are the ones that are like attached to the truck stops in the middle of

nowhere. I mean the worst anything is something attached to something. But it's just that smell. We talked about the subway smell on this podcast a whole lot and like that's. Yeah but now you get that with petroleum. Oh the bathrooms are so clean in here. Yeah and it smells like subway. It's not

a Bucky's. They're not clean bathrooms. Not at all. We should go to a Bucky's. We should go to a Bucky's soon. Yeah, maybe that's where I'll do the flip off Gracie's back. Oh, that's a good idea. We'll go to Bucky's. Do they got a pretzel table at Bucky's? Yeah, I bet.

No, they do. No. So stop saying tomorrow. Jesus Christ. What's wrong with you? God damn. Did we hit half an hour? We probably hit.

Oh, yeah. We hit 31 minutes. Wow. Was it actually 31? Yeah. I was in the process of saying it when you said it. That's crazy. Well, check out our YouTube channel.

We're cyberlinked. Check out our YouTube channel and that video Jordan couldn't find. Yeah. Check out facejampod.com and then facejampod.com slash first. See if you can find us on TikTok because I know we exist. Go to TikTok.com. Check it out. Go to TikTok.com. Check it out. Go to TikTok.com and search Michael and see what comes up.

Search Michael Jordan. None of these are me or Jordan. This guy's pretty good at jumping, though. Picture this one guy. Face January all month. Check it out. And then maybe Jamsgiving on the 26th. Wait, why is it maybe now?

Okay, definitely Jamsgiving. He's staking his reputation on it. Yeah, definitely. If I can't get this done, then I'm finished. Trying to get this done. But then work as normal will resume. Have you ever heard of david cameron no what what did he did he call a shot he called a shot oh cool i'm david cameron

but our english and uh british friends are gonna love it he was the prime minister and he was like if if brexit passes i will resign And then Brexit passed, so he resigned. Oh, Jesus. That's cool. I could do Brexit or whatever. Well, you would have to do your version, not just that other thing. I think let's just call it an exit. Yeah, I'll do Brexit.

We can't really make a portmanteau about it. If Jamsgiving isn't on the 26th, Eric will Brexit. I will Brexit. Whatever that means. Yep. Eric will leave the EU Oh this is the outro You're giving me

Yeah Hey thanks for listening To Spit and Silly Don't forget I thought it was For my other family I got a text I got excited

And then it was just Fucking you Sorry Great Thanks for listening To Spit and Silly Don't forget to listen To a new episode

Of Face Jam next week That's cool We started doing that That's right Next week Not this one No Tell a friend About this show Where we do Whatever we want we started doing that. That's right, next week. Not this one. Tell a friend about this show where we do whatever we want.

Goodbye. Or goodbye.