100% Eat - This is Sauce Monkey Food %% Whataburger Buffalo Ranch Chicken Strip Sandwich

Episode Date: July 16, 2024

Our Heroes are deep in the heart of fast food for this week's offering of Whataburger's Buffalo Ranch Chicken Strip Sandwich and Sauce Monkey Nick couldn't be happier. Is this saucy sandwich worth your time or is this deep fried chicken off the deep end? We also talk about Gavin shaving outside, filming Rocco, What-A-Burger, an extra piece of cheese causing problems, and so much more. This episode is sponsored by Shady Rays. Thanks, Shady Rays. Get 50% off of 2 pairs of polarized glasses at shadyrays.com - code EAT & 100% Eat is sponsored by BetterHelp. Get 10% off your first month at betterhelp.com/100Percent Grab a shirt at store.100percenteat.com while supplies last (there are plenty) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Benefits vary by card, other conditions apply. Welcome to 100% E on our brand new location, the show where we try every location to let us know if we need to rent it we probably do I'm your host Michael Jones alongside my co-host Jordan swears Jordan how are you no we definitely do we definitely need a spot to do this podcast we're bouncing around we're bouncing up I feel like though it's true yes this is probably one of the swankiest locations. It's swankish. The the amount of control we have over like the lighting and stuff. We got the

side. We got this little iPad thing that controls it. I won't be touching it. Thank you. But I could be. You could be. I know that you should be. Yeah. You should be. Please don't. We're at Hungry Dog Studios in Austin. We found the space, checked it out, and I immediately went, oh, this is gonna be fantastic. The air conditioner is blowing so cold. Oh, it feels so nice. It feels so good in here. It's so nice, and it's so high up too.

Not that I give a shit about the sound anyway, but it's like way over there. It is, and there's a bathroom, and there's a voiceover recording space. There is, uh-huh. And this is, oh, what a spot, and we have a new camera. space. This is oh what a spot and we have a new camera and yeah we do one yeah Nick is monitoring it just in case because it literally just got here. Fucks up. But yeah. Then we know it's ours

ago. What the fuck did I do? Not set it up right. I told I told my wife that I got made fun of yesterday because I didn't want to spend the money on a camera. I think it's a perfectly legitimate healthy habit. It is, but not to the extent of not buying it. Right. Like you did with the microphones. To make sure we're all on the same page about doing it. Yes.

Yes. Yeah. No, I agree. Now the $30 on the SD card may have been a little... And hey, that is the SD card that we're using in our baby. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If that, was it a regular SD or micro? No, no regular SD. That's why I was the only one who said,

I was like, why is he gonna buy this camera? It's gonna be a micro SD and it's not gonna fit. And he just bought it and he's gonna lose it. That would have been very funny. When he sent us the listing for the camera, I was like, I'm sure he knows. I don't need to ask about the memory card situation. Before I sent it, did my due diligence.

I will say. The first one he sent was a $180 used camera. And I was like, are you fucking serious? No, that's why I deleted it. What the fuck is wrong with you? Yeah, so I deleted it because I just went, what am I? I opened it. I sat there and I opened it.

What am I doing? You know how sometimes it's like newer used options? There were no new options. It was only used. All used. It was like six left. I was like, we're buying a new one because the camera we have already sucks.

Why the fuck are we buying a new used camera? And then he went, oh, this one, this one. Yeah, that's right. This is what I meant. So I deleted it and I just went like, this is, I need to get over this. I just don't want to spend the money. Like we're going to have to like shoestring it.

I feel good about like what we're doing. I don't think we're gonna have to like shoestring it. I feel good about like what we're doing. We're gonna have to shoestring it um for the camera. No, we have a great camera now. If we are we got bigger problems. There are certain things we shouldn't shoestring and uh I think I think looking at Goodwill and in one of those big rectangular video tape insert over the shoulder cameras I just don't think that's the move. Well, you know, and you'll be happy to know it's not tilted in one direction. It's not tilted and you figured out how to turn the fucking spotlight off. Thank God. Oh, I did. Yes, I did.

Yeah, didn't realize there was a spotlight on and Jordan went, that light is so bright. And then I looked and it was not on. No. What do you mean? And then you put my hand in front of it. It's like, oh, fuck, it's a great little camera. It was one of those things where you can't help but look at it and it's blinding you.

Yeah, it definitely is something that we would use to film in public for Mega64, like 100%. 100% 64. That's me holding that as Rocco rolls around on the ground for a way too long period of time. And you're just going, please stop, please stop. You stop, please stop. Behind a tree filming him. Eating trash. Rolling around on the ground in front of families and you're just like, I want to go, I want to go. He's over-encumbered. It's honestly a more uncomfortable position to be filming it. It is.

Doing it. It absolutely. Because he's at least being a freak. They're going to look at him and then look at you, the normal guy with a camera, and go, what are you doing? Yep. What are you doing? Why are you filming it? He's in control of the situation. Yeah.

At a moment's notice, he can go, I'm done now. And that's it. I can't. Yeah, you got it. Oh, fuck, they want to hold. They got it. It is the worst. Filming for each of those guys was different.

Filming for Rocco was like, that was an endurance. You just left and you're like, I have a pit in my stomach six hours later. I just feel bad. It's awful. Well, I'm glad that this camera brought it all back. Yeah.

Yeah. That's how I started doing stuff like that to him. I can do Rocco stuff. No. Michael would be great at Rocco stuff. Do it. I could put myself aside my shame aside just for a second. Just for a second. Just for a second.

There is a great Rocco Tick Tock where he was at Disneyland. It's like he's fil shaky cam filming at Disneyland going to see what secrets you didn't do that you need to go about. If you go over here, there's salt, there's salt and pepper. It's the salt. It's like free free food for annual pass holders and ticket holders. And it's just like salt, pepper relish little condiment thing. I got like too far into that tick tock. Yeah.

And I knew it was Rocco. But like my wife was just listening and she goes, Oh, fuck. That's Rocco. I thought this was going to be like an actual tip. He nails it. And you talk about shameless, it's just like, I'm going to wear my Jar Jar Binks hat to the movies and film this video. And it's like, oh my god, just go to the movies. Rocco is special because it's shameless, but like, for a man who has shame. Oh absolutely, you can just turn it off. Yeah, because some people are always like that.

Like Chris, for example. Right, Chris doesn't know he's joking. He he doesn't know and you're like god damn yeah after I was more impressive because it's like you normal you hates this yes right Rocco going up on like the the live e3 thing project wind whistler hitting on the fucking ground and Gus is trying to like so what is this I don't I don't know how to make it any more clear to you. Bernie is going, it's not real. It's not real. It's bullshit. It's so funny.

Speaking of Chris, after he told us on the Michael Jordan podcast about how he evolved shaving to shave outside, I was hanging out with Gavin the other day and a friend of the show who... What do you mean? Gafferan? Oh, Davin Green? and friend of the show who I was- What do you mean? What was it? Gafferan? Oh, what was it?

Davin Greene? Davin Greene. Davin G. He, I brought up, oh, we saw Chris and he said that he involved shaving and shaves outside and Gavin went, I shave outside. And I went, what the fuck? What?

And then he showed me a setup and it's two broken pieces of mirror leaned against the side of his house. Like does he look and see Dumbledore in it? Right. He sees his eye. Yeah. Or it's a shattered mirror, you said.

He sent a picture of him crying. He's crouching and like shaving. How is this working? I mean, the bathroom. I don't understand. That's what I said. And what are you talking about? At least Chris is setting up a mirror on a tree.

On a tree, at least. And he doesn't have to crouch on the side of it. And it's broken. I don't understand. It was one mirror that has snapped, and it is just two mirror shards that leaned against his house. This reeks of he didn't plan this.

He happened to be walking by, and he was like, I could shave your wife. I could shave your team. Oh, I can't see you doing it. I don't understand. He was proud of it. I don't understand. He was like proud of it. I don't understand. He was like, oh, I'll show you my setup.

And he showed me and I just went, you shouldn't show this to people. Here's something that I wish I would have asked Chris. By the way, we ate one of the burgers. Oh, right, right, right. Yeah, yeah. Let's just point that out. And we can talk about the food in like 10 minutes from now.

No one was slack-jawed. We got to fill the time with other stuff. Nothing wacky happened. Oh my God, we went in, we ordered, we got the food, and we left. It was a pretty decent operation. You could tell I went. No one in the back was going to fight anyone else in the back.

Dude, in fact, in fact, there was a guy dancing, and he was doing a very good job. It was like a Gen Z kid that was like dancing in the water bar outfit. And I was like, this place is very different than subway The food that the food got set down and yeah, I don't know if you were next I would want to who just goes with a presentation. Oh, that was Jordan Well, I was amazed that I unwrapped it and it was right side up. Yeah, it was all like they really considered together. Do you consider to me? Yeah, all four of them were right side up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Everything about it was got sauce.

Yeah, it was. Oh, oh, well, he's yelling sauce stuff. Let me let me go quick back around to what I was going to say. So the question I wish I'd asked Chris was what is this shaving you utensil like what tool does he use? Because I always imagine people shaving razor, shaving cream. Yeah. But I think at some point I realize he's probably using an electric razor, which makes it a little less crazy because then he's not dealing with like having to wash his face and stuff.

I mean it just seems impossible without it, right? Yes. Otherwise, he just has to be like, oh, I have this old bucket filled with rainwater. Right. Because what I was picturing the whole time was like, I go outside, I wet my face, I use my hose. Yeah. And then I put the shaving cream on and then I shave outside. It's like, it just seems like so much more work. Yeah. For me, which, you know, to be fair, compared to Gavin, who is like a grizzly bear. You know what I mean? Yeah. I'm surprised he even like, even, even I imagine he's trimming. I, I would understand slightly more than Chris just because that guy can shave once a day, and it's probably like six pounds of hair.

Yes. In his bathroom. That might make a little sense, but then also, you know, maybe don't use too broken shards of glass. Chris does not make sense. No. Chris is not a mountain man. But yeah, I have an electric razor and I use nothing. No creams.

And you do it in the bathroom and you wash down the sink. And then that's it. And it takes two minutes. Problem solved. I just don't expect that kind of Chris behavior from Gavin. No. I expect Gavin behavior from Gavin. It really shocked me when he showed me

how he hunches over like Gollum in front of two broken shards in his backyard. This guy has a YouTube channel with billions of views and he does that. It shaves us. I mean he really is like ehhh. Like it's really something. I have texted Pasta Pete. It's just a sharpened rock.

I've texted Pasta Pete to ask him what he uses outside. Oh great. Well hopefully he gets back to us in the middle of the episode, but we'll see. If it's not electric razor, I'm not. How? I hope it's not. I hope it's not. I hope it's high end.

Well I had to do it in the garden. I hope that he does like, oh when I shave outside, I use my badger hair brush and I use my lather. That was my 500 yen dollar. And he puts in like the new straight razor. He's doing straight razor the whole time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He has like the big, he has like big leather strap hanging from the fucking tree.

He's doing it red dead style. Manscape beard trimmer. Got it for free. Oh yeah, me too. It's fantastic. Charges with USB-C, we can move beyond the world of stupid AC plugs like weird shapes like a TV plug. Yeah I use that and I plug it in my phone when I'm done. It's fucking I get angry now Even if something has a micro USB. I'm pissed. Yeah. Yeah, USB-C stop. Let's let's just because the iPhone now

Yeah, I got it here. That's all I need. God damn it. It's actually universal. Yeah, let's just keep it cool shape. Yeah Yeah, he really likes the shape. Yeah, do you know what else he likes? real shape guys Walking into the fucking water burger dude. It took two seconds for him to go. Oh I don't even know if you what he saw we walked in and immediately turned around start pointing at the dude I don't how did he fucking I don't know except Turned around pointed at it and I, what, it's just spicy ketchup.

But then he's like, whoa! I'm getting there. And he's like, with Cholula, with Cholula! And it's like a, it's a Whataburger spicy ketchup with Cholula. And it doesn't even show you the actual bottle. It shows you a bottle of spicy ketchup and a bottle of Cholula. And it's like, but now it's one. It's implied that they're together.

And he even starts yelling, he's like, can you, can you get to hear you about it in the store and it's literally on the window i think that was my question is like do you get it here no it says in your local store or what a burger dot com that's not what he said he was like he was like both both both right but you can't get it at the water burger now otherwise he would have bought it i did white label the and then and then at that point i turn Johnny Walker yeah I looked at you and you were already in line going because we walked in and he was again it was like I was trapped in a door was open it was before the door was even fully open with you I don't know how you saw that because it was on the inside of the door fucking

crazy but we but then I did get him spicy ketchup the guy asked me oh do you guys want any sauces with this stuff and I just went let's just spicy ketchup let's just do I call it I call it the Bado sauce oh that's a sauce for fucking losers whoa no I just like I just thought it was cool that Being so inspired by yeah, yeah Chris still has that was what 2018 yeah Which failed attempt Surprised we haven't seen him rear his head this year 2028 here we go He kicks flips in but he doesn't land it. That'd be pretty cool. That'd be pretty cool.

Hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on. Oh shit, hang on, wait, we're renting. What did we eat at Whataburger? The Whataburger Buffalo Ranch Chicken Strip Sandwich, which they have all the time. It is a limited time thing. It's not that limited though. It gets phased out.

I started eating it and I go, this is new? And Nick goes, it comes and goes. Because Michael was like, I go this is this new and Nick and it goes comes and goes Like I've definitely had this Multiple times they've been making a big deal about it being back and it does not feel like it's a big deal that it's back It's not yeah, I mean it's you know They have it all the time. That's it's the first I've heard about it ever honestly I've never even seen it on the menu, but yeah, not living I'm not living at what burger exactly you're not living that burger yeah I was telling Nick what a restaurant when I think of what a

burger I think of Nick like yeah that they they really coincide to me and I don't know what it is I think of all the people who are from I think of and grew up I think of Nick and Jack. Sorry. Sorry. That's, that's who you're lumped in with, but Nick, did you also get the little order thing and you got to play a game and flip it at the table? The little triangle? No, the little number down and you do a little right.

But do you do that? We did. Yeah. See how he's saying yes. That's why I steal any. There was a cool, there was a cool little, uh, uh, like tri-corner advertising thing.

And on one of the sides they had this. Tri-lithium. They had this cool. Tri-force. Uh, water burger igloo mashup, uh, for a backpack. Okay. Wait, is this your honeybutterbiscuit.com website that you're hanging out on?

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, this is something else. Jordan kept showing me water burger hats. Okay. Yeah, cause the Corpus Christi hooks Is this your honeybutterbiscuit.com website that you're hanging out on? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no Cool water burger back. Just change the lights It's fine. It's fine. I believe you I think it's like believe you I believe you anyway, I Think I think I the water burger colors like the stripes and the logo it lends itself really well to this kind of like Crossover activation things yeah like the backpack was cool, and the the minor league baseball hats are cool I think they they do the right color orange for like their stuff. Yeah, we really could have learned from them, honestly.

I think our former orange color, it wasn't water burger enough. Yeah, I mean, do you remember though, like in the creation of the show and the colors, it was real get the fuck out the door. Yeah. Can we make this fucking thing and get out the door? And that was kind of what happened. And we just never changed it only reason was kind of what happened and we never change. Uh huh.

That was minutes of work. Yeah. We really have notes. No, you don't. Oh, I hadn't considered that. Yeah. Yeah, that was the thing. And then, and then, and then we kind of had to force their hand by doing our own thing. And it was so bad. They were like, fine, we'll just fucking boy. They were not happy. Here's something great. Yep. And Yep, and it's like we should just started there. Yep. Yeah the blue one. It was just we need a logo Yeah, well, we don't have time. All right. Well, we need to do I guess Pretty cool. I have notes. Mm-hmm Okay, it wasn't it wasn't as much as it was like well, here's why they're bad note

That's that was the craziest part is the pushback on the notes where it's like, all right, I guess we'll just do your thing. That were just based on nothing that we gave you. That's cool. That's I just chose not to care about any of it. Yes. And and that's why I was busy buying flags. That's right. Where if we don't get what we want, it's about to be dangerous for everyone. Yeah. Like just sending pictures of Michael's Amazon cart to Trevor being like, you better figure it out.

But I'm about to buy this. So that's a, that's what a burger. So we didn't, that's all we just didn't really not a lot with happening today I mean a lot was happening, but that wasn't the ride along. Yeah. Oh, that's right So the last the last episode in our weird time paradox where the ride along was first. Yeah It was oh my god so much happened in Subway I can't even scratch the surface here and then it was half the episode. Yeah, this ride along was Well, we're here. What do we do? Yeah we all right we're leaving the water burger and we're here.

Yeah so what do we do instead and then it was just a tour through Austin. Yeah just driving around. Well yeah but it was it's not like we went that far we went right down the street. Well it was kind of right down the street and then you started making wrong turns. It was an adventure. It was pretty good. We went on the roundabout. You came to try to kill this kid on a bike. I didn't because we pulled up next to him and I was looking around the window. I was like, this gets scared. And then he drove off going, ah. So if you want to see that, check out the ride along. It's a pretty isolated story. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a fun one. Nick and I wore the same shirt. I guess that happened. We didn't plan it this time. You

know, we do it on accident. And then if we try to plan it, we can't do it. My wife washed it. Yeah, she washed it. Sometimes I wear a women's cut, but it works out anyway. It was yesterday when we were doing, I guess last week when we were doing that episode, and it was like, it's a women's cut. And you went, oh, that's why when I lift my arms it was like, it's a woman's cut. That's fine though, because I want a crop top anyway. Yep, yep.

And it was crop top. I should have just bought a small. Yep. Then it would have been a crop top. It was a... Crop it yourself. Crop it. Eric knows how to hem. I do. It's true. Jordan, you know we have been a crop top. It was a... Crop it yourself. A crop it. Eric knows how to him. I do, it's true.

Jordan, you know we love Shady Rays. Eric doesn't know, but he's usually not included. I'm here to learn. All right, we'll let you learn. Because we and them, Shady Rays, are excited. They're offering you their best deal. Head to ShadyRays.com and use code EAT for 50% off two or more pairs of polarized sunglasses.

Eric, I don't want to alarm you, but did you know those glasses that you have? The ones that I've been waving around? Yeah. They're Shady Rays. These are Shady Rays? Why'd you tell him? Oh man! I wanted him to think he wasn't in the club, but he has been in the Shady Rays.

I have been in the Shady Rays club. These sunglasses are built to last so you can get ready for the season ahead. Our friends at Shady Rays have you covered with premium polarized shades that won't break the bank. And that's what these are. These are polarized. I put them on. I just keep realizing that we're not getting any of them. If he's putting them on,

we're also not outside in the sun right now. There's no polarization to worry about. It's very dark in here with sunglasses on. Dude, we're inside. I just beached. I had two pairs with me just in case the ocean took one. Cause that happened last time. Been there.

Guess what? Guess what? Ocean took one, lost in broken replacements, got a new pair. Dude. The ocean stole, and Shady Ray's giveth. Poseidon took, and Shady Ray's has given. Dude, Shady Ray's truly a god of sunglasses. They popped a pair over to Hermes,

and he zipped them right back at me. Just flew right over to me, dropped them off. I literally I procrastinate on everything you know I lost the sunglasses I at the beach I got back to my phone and put it I want to get these pair I want to get my favorite pair cuz like got them back when you're shopping there's no risk cuz their team always has your back with personal and fast support and if you don't love your shades you can exchange them for a new pair or return worry-free within 30 days.

I ain't worried. No. Like, Eric usually is when we have to record an episode for some reason. I'm nervous when we have to go to these places I've never been to, but I always trust my Shady Rays because they have durable frames

and crystal clear optics, making them the perfect choice for all outdoor adventures. We love Shady Rays. We wear Shady Rays every day. We really do. Yeah, you guys should check them out. You know, have you ever watched the ride along and you're like, why are they all wearing sunglasses?

And they're all the same. Nick and Jordan are wearing the same shirt, the same sunglasses. We're outfitted pretty much by the same. Yep. 100% eat and Shady Rays. Not required, just wanted to be worn. Yeah, absolutely.

So go to ShadyRays.com and use code EAT for 50% off, two or more pairs of polarized sunglasses And don't burn your peepers. Don't be out there looking up at the Sun melting your black dark balls of sight Yep, it's true. You wear Shady Ray sunglasses and still don't look at the Sun Just wear them because they feel nice and I could take a peek at it. Okay. I'll just for a second You got to be quick though. I'm fast like Hermes This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp Therapy Online. For 10% off your first month, go to BetterHelp.

That's H-E-L-P dot com slash 100%. Comparison is the thief of joy and it's easy to envy other people's lives. Dude, you have no idea. I'm always looking on Instagram and I'm like, gosh, Michael's got it together. I'm always seeing Michael's texts that he sends me and going like he's always doing stuff and going out. And why can't that be me? It's true. It's true.

I am doing stuff. I am going out. But Eric Jordan, I have to tell you, it might look like I have it all together on my Instagram, but in reality, I definitely don't. It's a look. Look, there's good times, but you can't you can't compare yourself to everybody all the time, and especially not the little lens that you see through social media. Because social media, look, is good.

There's some good sides to it, but also really easy to fall into a little mental spiral when you're comparing your life and thinking other people have things that you want. And it's not healthy for you sometimes. Yeah, it's helpful for learning positive coping skills, getting into therapy, trying something like BetterHelp, because it's about setting boundaries for yourself, for others, finding out what empowers you and makes you the best version of yourself, and not comparing yourself to

someone like Michael, who again, looks like he has it all, all the time. And I try very hard to make it look like that, sometimes at my own detriment. Yeah. It's an image that I must maintain, Eric, at all times, and there's nothing I can do about it. Is there? No. I mean, you can try therapy and see that you really don't have to present yourself like that online. That's a weight off my shoulders. Yeah. You could try BetterHelp and give it a try there. Jordan, what do you think? Well, I mean, if you've been looking at Michael's Instagram, you've been having these thoughts, you know, maybe look at BetterHelp. If you're thinking of starting therapy, give BetterHelp a try. It's entirely online,

designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule so you can keep one wheeling around like Michael. How would I, what would I have to do to do that? Is it like a long complicated process? No, you just fill out this brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist and switch therapists at any time for no additional charge. That does sound convenient. Stop comparing and start focusing with BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com slash 100% today to get 10% off your first month. Don't let that confuse you.

That's BetterHelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash one zero zero P-E-R-C-E-N-T. Do you guys want to learn about, what a burger? Did you forget what the restaurant was called? I almost said Subway. Dude, I hope there's not a fact in here that's like, I thought it was about the restaurant. It's about something else called Water Burger. I actually looked up Water Burger.

We will, we will, we will learn about other Water Burger. Don't worry about it. Our last Water Burger episode as Face Jam was December 6 6, 2022, where we ate the breakfast bowls. They received an average rating of thirty nine point five. Nick apparently remembered it intently because he just went, oh, so, as I said, breakfast bowls. I think I remember that was the one where you got in a car at all. Right. No, the car accident. That was Chuck E. Cheese.

No, the one where you got in the car accident. I don't know. For the episode. No, we did like a morning episode. It might have been that one, but I don't remember. Breakfast bowls. Yeah. No, I think that, hmm. Because that's the day it came out.

That's the day it came out. It's close. The dates are close to matching up. Yeah. No, I think that was October. I think it was November because the World Cup was going on. Well, you need to remember. I just remember running over some lady.

Yeah. The other thing, that's the last time. She was in a car remember I just remember running over some lady. Yeah, the the other thing that's the last time in a car just ran the whole car over. That's the last time we officially reviewed what a burger. But we had it officially. We had it. Was that of 2022? You're right. Yeah. So we had it after that when we compared Popeye's wings with whatever guys have made. I was in a car accident. I'm not joking. Yeah.

With Whataburger's wings. Guys, I'm mad. I was in a car accident. I'm not joking. Yeah. I'm going to be late. So we've done Whataburger since then, but not officially. So that's our last official. Those things fucking suck.

Yeah. Those were terrible. That's, you know, done. And those are all the facts. And those are all the facts. No. That's the first one. Oh.

More. Do you want me to rocko it? In 2020, Whataburger started a San Antonio food-based truck that looked to serve military families and healthcare workers around its quote, restaurant footprint area. Whataburger said that you can keep up with the truck using hashtag Where's Whataburger, but the last post was on September 11th 2023 where were you okay where's water burger a second truck has hit San Antonio come on what what's a restaurant footprint area I don't know I assume

they just go here's a truck and we'll just buy some burgers from one of our restaurants and then hand them out to the military. Yeah, I mean, if there's a restaurant footprint area, wouldn't they just go to the restaurant? Right. Yes, that's what I thought. It seems to be with the restaurant coverage. Yeah, one where there is no restaurant. But it's probably a thing where it's like, hey, it's a half marathon for the kids and here's the Whataburger truck and you can get a Whataburger. Camera turn off? No. We were too loud. So the what a burger truck is just a food truck with whatever they're like it's 19 feet long It's like that doesn't matter there. That's kind of cool. Is it 19 feet long? Yeah See if I can find a picture of this you use that

around all the construction Nick just said that 19 dippers. Google back to subway. Well, there was no 19 dry, dry dip. Yeah, there's no. Oh, yeah. What did you guys end up calling them? Like, there's no dip.

Yeah. Are you looking up the water burger? Yeah, you look that up. I'll read the next. I'll read the next fact. OK, not to be outdone by Jack in the Box. What a burger is 2024 offering for teachers appreciation week consisted of a free taquito and a what a teacher table tent, whatever that is.

They also gave $63,000, $1,000 grants to schools, which is good because that way it doesn't go to the teachers. Why didn't we, we didn't get any free taquitos this year, did you? Teachers walking around with their table tents thinking they're better than you. Get on your dirty bike monkey, it's time to ride. It's a callback. I had to make sure I didn't say dirt bike. I just...

Dirty bike. Driving to a water burger and be like, one free taquito, please? And my tent. Yeah, give me a tent. My what a teacher tent. Driving to a Whataburger to be like, one free taquito, please? What, dude? And my tent. Yeah, my, give me a tent. My what a teacher tent. Until you guys said the table tent. I didn't know that's what the thing was called.

Like the number. Right. Because that's just- Right, I forgot. Because it's a stupid name. Right, because other restaurants have that. It's not like Whataburger is the only thing that has a little-

Yeah. A fucking order number. Yes, exactly. Yeah, order number A frame thing. Hey man, the table tent. These a little A frame thing. A fucking order number. Yes, exactly. Yeah, an order number A frame thing. Hey man, table tents. These are table tents. And you can flip them like Jack and Nick. Whee!

Just they're just out there flipping. Hanging out together flipping a football game. Did you find it? Dude, that predated the flip the bottle thing. Yeah. Oh. Right, you flip it and it's got to land right side up. I have found like four posts.

Yeah! How long is it? But they're never like from an official account. It's just random people right side up. I have found like four posts. Yeah, they're just how long is it? But they're never like from an official account. It's just right and people haven't been September 11. I'm trying to find the last one. Where were you? Come out to the promenade for free what a burger presented by coca-cola Free what a burger presented by coca-cola wait, so teachers getting a free taquito, but everybody's getting free what a burger presented by Coca-Cola wait so teachers getting a free to keto, but everybody's getting free what a burger finally We're all teachers. We're on this day September 11th

2023 we are all teachers Give me my free water burger give me my taquito Ready anyway, North Carolina's what aurger Number 13 is still being sued by regular Whataburger for copyright infringement and in June of this year, 2024, stated that they've had an agreement with Whataburger since 1970. In response, Whataburger said that it is, quote, a loyal supporter of local businesses, including small restaurants, we have extended every opportunity for Whataburger number 13 to cease and desist from breaching the party's agreement and infringing our Whataburger trademarks.

Fuck yeah. Now that's some small business support. Hey fucking idiots. Cut the shit and die. What are they, teachers? LAUGHS So, just for writing sake here, it's listed as what a burger. What a burger is one word and what dash a dash burger number 13.

Yep. Is the 13 really important to us? Apparently. So in North Carolina, there's a place called what a burger with all the dashes and everything. And what a burger as for some reason, two years ago started suing them going, you got to stop. And they're like, we have an agreement with you that goes all the way back to 1970. And you guys are deciding that this is done.

And then Whataburger, regular Whataburger just went. Yeah, fuck you, die. Exactly. They just went, right, and it ends today. And like, oh, it does? That's kind of crazy. So they've been going back and forth for two years. Every opportunity to get fucked.

And they haven't. And they have. And they have not gotten fucked. It looks nothing like a water burger. So did you look it up? Did you use hashtag? What a dash number 13. Where's water burger 13?

Uh huh. I'm not on the Wi Fi.. Where's waterburger 13? Uh-huh. The, I'm not on the wifi so it's a little spotty. You fool! You got to. It looks more like Top Notch. Yes. It's just a little rink of Dean. Top Notch is good.

Yes it is. Brick diner with a sign. It is. It looks nothing like a waterburger. And it says number 13 because it's just a place called what a burger, like it's not what a burger. Honestly, this is the Streisand effect. Yes, they shouldn't have.

They're calling more attention to it, just let it be. This is like if Wiener Schnitzel, the restaurant, decided to sue Wiener Schnitzel the general food and go like, that's actually our copyright. It's like, I don't think that's how this works at all. But hopefully they don't get fucked. Let's go to what a burger number 13. The final fact. While trying to muscle Whataburger number 13 out of North Carolina,

Whataburger is attempting to muscle into South Carolina by opening a dozen locations. While they were rejected last year, Whataburger reworked their proposal and are now moving forward with opening shop by using the corpses of old TGI Fridays as their home. No word on if the repurposed buildings will have their famous TGI Fridays bathrooms, but we know one loyal 100%er whose dad cannot wait to get in there and check for himself. TGIF, bro. Dude, that's a big shout out, dude. That is a huge shout out. Dude, she made the fact.

She's gonna love that. That's cool. She's on the uh she's on the thumbnail for the video that Ray shot like our like sizzle reel thing or whatever from our live show. Yeah dude. She wants. Dude I was flexing. So we have we have a 100% we have a fan out there who told us about how. I was gonna mention it on the Michael Jordan podcast with Chris, but I didn't know Chris was on it and he came and he talked about not Stinky Dragon for 29 minutes. And so I didn't really get to it, but I mentioned it right at the very end and she was in the audience and she was like, this is my sister, this is my sister, that's our dad.

She was thrilled, the sister was just like. She said that when they were kids, they would go to that TGA Fridays, the one that we went to. Well, like in South Park Meadows. Like the one that's way down there, that is demolished. It's just raised to the fucking ground, it's done. She said they would go there when they were kids

and their dad would disappear into the bathroom for like minutes at a time and come back and like fucking, he would go in there and legit TGIF bro all in that in that TGIF right is and she's like, so when you guys did that fact, like forever ago, it was like, oh shit, that's real. So now maybe try to find it. South Carolina is where they can go.

We got one of a dozen locations to go to. Mm hmm. Check out and go into the bathroom and see if It just has like the vibe you know what I'm right. Yeah, yeah, how come they didn't Demolish those TGI Fridays. I think they I think they probably destroyed them from the inside And then when you want to do anything with this like like what was that the pizza hut that was up in like Ann Arbor or whatever? What's gonna happen guys what's gonna happen? Guys, what's gonna happen? Pizza Hut demolished. Oh, uh oh.

When did we do that show? What day was that? Uh... June 16th? Yeah, something like around there. 18th? Yeah. Right, I don't know what day that is, Nick. It's a Sunday.

Yeah. Thanks. What are you looking for? I have a tweet she sent. Oh, really? Yeah. Nice one. Kill time, kill time.

Uh, okay. So, uh, let's see, uh, TGIF, bro, uh, whatever. Teachers yelled, sauced up. Okay. Well, I mean, he was the, the change in Nick's mood was a 180. Oh, got it. Here we go. Okay. Thank you, 100% eat.

Uh, Michael, Eric, Jordan, Nick, for an amazing show. Now you know about my crack head dad. TGIF bro, sunglass emoji, bicep emoji, donkey. Thank you, agent of nonsense. Donkey emoji is really cool. That's doing like a lot of like the heavy lifting. We were doing donkey muscles. Oh man. We're doing donkey muscles.

Oh yeah. It was such a good live show. That was great. That was like a lot of fun. And then Ray put together that says a reel that was really, really cool. Thank God. Yeah. He...

Thank God he had a camera. Yeah. We have a camera now too. Yeah, we do now. And it's still recording. OK. I didn't like how long it took him to look over there. He really looked for it.

He woke up, right? You were saying that Nick's mood changed when we got that water burger, he got it. He had the sauciest fucking meal. It was drip city. Dude, he opened it and it was already dripping. And he was just like, woo. It was coming out the back.

It was like a sauce all over this one. Someone like. And then he went. Someone was like making up for yesterday. Oh like, whoa. It was coming out the back. It was like a sauce all over this one. Yeah. Someone like. And then he went. They. Someone was like making up for yesterday. Oh, yeah, definitely. God himself or herself. Whoa.

I think it was the devil. You know what? Because it's been pretty hot. I do think it was the devil also. It was it was a saucy sandwich. Mine dripped a little bit. It wasn't close to Nick's. No, mine dripped a little bit too. I't close to Nick's. No, mine dripped a little bit too.

I looked at this right now, he's like, ah. We were saying, look like a fucking close up from Ren and Stimpy. Ah. Ah. Ah. John K looking at us.

Saw like every hair on his face and like the pores it was coming out of. Ah. We were saying there's something about this, a glass shatter sound effect and a scream. We were saying nose hairs. Fucking hell. There's something about this food where the flavor and the texture makes you want to continue eating it. Saying that you're like, you're like, I want more flavor in my mouth.

Yeah, that's all I want. I want to taste it. I want to taste it. I want to stop eating, but I keep wanting to taste it. It's checking all the boxes on like flavor in my mouth, soft food, go down fast. It kind of subconsciously had that effect on me. While I was like, I took one bite.

It's like, OK, I think I know. Like I was like, I'll take another bite. Yeah. Just make sure. And then I was just kind of there. I was like, I took one bite. It's like, okay, I think I know. I was like, I'll take another bite. Just to make sure. And then I was just kind of there. And I was like, another bite. I think I ate half of it before I realized I should put this away. You put it away and then Nick's like, I should.

I was like, I was done. His was already fucking balled up. Yeah. Balled up wrapper. Don't worry. Did you eat the brownie too? Yeah. And then you took the extra brownie? And then you took an extra one. Did you too? Did you take the extra brownie?

Did you really? Did you take the extra extra one? Oh, the one that I opened it. The half that Eric ate. Why not? Why didn't you take that? Too, too tempting. Too tempting? Too tempting?

Dude, here's how I check it out. Didn't even hold it in my hand the whole time. I was gonna say, you should have. Gracie's Gracie's style. It's not Gracie's style. It it in my hand. I was going to say you should have. Gracie's Gracie style. It's not Gracie style. It's in a wrapper. It's in a wrapper and it was in my pocket. Not my clothes.

This unwrapped in your hand the whole time. Would you like 33 minutes in the whole brownie? You can have the extra one tomorrow and you can have this one the day after tomorrow. You liked it so much. I don't want to waste it You should probably eat this one first. It's not gonna be open. So you don't sooner. Yeah. Yeah, it's going in the freezer Already got a plane boy. This was the conversation. He walked away. He was wiping the sweat from it Oh, he threw it away. Yeah, but I won't have to worry about Michael. I will not I I Overcame the temptation Mike will not. I overcame the temptation.

Michael will not be challenged throwing away the trash. Looked at me and he goes, I'm saving this for Nick. He's going to want it. Yeah. Uh huh. I know Nick. You'll thank him later. Yeah. In like two days, you'll be like, there's going to be a message on our slide going, it's good. going, it's good. Yeah. Yeah. I was, cause I didn't even eat mine at all. And I made very clear as we sat down, I was like, I don't want the brownie, I'm not gonna eat the brownie.

Then we got done eating and Nick was like, oh, it was brownie, it was brownie. I was like, that's mine. He's like, oh, and I went, I made it pretty clear. I'm not eating that. And he went, you have to. I did say you have to. I said, no, I don't. No, I don't. And he went, ooh. Well. I said, no, I don't.

No, I don't. And he went, ooh. Well, he was like, maybe I shouldn't. And then Eric started going, but I mean, you hold on to it. Yeah. Put it in the microwave. Just think about how good it's going to be when you put it in the microwave. They started to get calories and I just kept saying, but for tomorrow.

Yeah. But for tomorrow, you can't argue that. Put a little ice cream on the top of it. Yeah. And then he was like, he was like, go outside, shave. Yeah. But then he would come over can't argue that. Put a little ice cream on the top of it. Yeah, and then he was like, he was like, go outside, shave. Yeah. But then he would come over and be like,

can I borrow some ice cream? And just dab it into his bowl. He resisted that one. Yeah. And like, I was like, OK, maybe we should go before like Nick caves in. And as soon as I said that, he was like, I'm taking it. Yeah.

And then he got up. Grabbed it. I was like, well. Yep. And now you've got two. Oh, wow. I'm rich. Yeah, he's rich. There's just one little bite. Just break that off. And I was like, well. Yep. And now you've got two. Oh, wow. I'm rich. Yeah.

He's rich. There's just one little bite. Just break that off. Yeah. I mean, I only pulled it off. And it was a tear. Oh, you didn't even bite it? No.

It was a tear. Oh, my god. That's perfect as is, dude. Yeah. It's mint condition. Yeah. Put that in your whole mouth. This one's not even used.

You could list this on Amazon as new. Yeah. And Eric would buy it. Eric will buy it. All right. Used brownie, $150. And I'm going, is this better than the piece of shit camera we have? that doesn't work?

Why would we buy this? I couldn't fucking believe that. I didn't even respond. Cause I was just staring at it going, no fucking way. He linked $150 used camera for us to buy for our business. And then a second one popped up and it was new and a couple hundred more dollars. And just by that alone that price is everything but 150 is too low it's too low I didn't even see that so like I just saw the way was also hoping nobody

saw that oh I guess I mean not saying it you didn't realize that I had to you gotta be fucking kidding me dude if you buy, I'm gonna be fucking pissed. Cause then you go from like, why do I spend money to, you've wasted $150 on a camera that's not gonna work. You're wasting your time. And there was like six. It's like only six left. I'm like, there's six of this used camera left?

Get them all you can. What the fuck? Well, if we buy four of them and tape them together. This might be one camera. Oh man. Oh fuck. Quad vision. Speaking of doing this Gracie style,

I was talking to Gracie earlier today. Needed some information from her or whatever. And then I offered her something they were doing for an ad read and everything. And she, I'm like, let me know if you want this thing. And we'll do this. And she replied, ooh, said like Nick. Oh, yeah.

In text. Yeah, you've got to put it in asterisks. But then we talked about it. Nick style. But then we talked about more stuff later, and she was excited about something else. And she wrote, woo, said like me. Woo.

I think the woo and the woo, they're distinct enough even through text that I can tell. Yeah. But thank you for the clarification. I don't even think the oo has an H on it. I think it's like a bunch of little O's getting big. It's all again. Right. It's a very small W. And then it's woo.

And it goes a little bit smaller at the end. Yeah. Why was that the thing that she would do when it's like, can you do something wrong on the microphone? I don't know. I didn't even notice it until we started pointing it out. She would do that. Hey, Gracie, can you give me something loud on the microphone?

And she would be like typing and go, woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! I think one time I said that it sounded like the sound effect from Futurama when Bender's a human. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. Woo! Woo! Woo! It's just the air escaping his folds. That wasn't him saying woo. That was just the air escaping his fat folds. It's been bad since yesterday. And then he push him and he goes woo!

Oh man. They should bring that show back. One more time! Dude, you know what? One more time! Fifth time's the charm. I don't even know if it's back already. It is and I think it's gone.

I think it's gone. Hey, what about the food? What did we order, Jordan? Tell us about it. We already told you, it was the buffalo chicken. But teach me about it. What a burger. Buffalo branch chicken. Sauce? Can I get sauce? You look like the other guy in Subway. I better make better make

nine more dippers sauce six more dude the guy like like he like he had like the the dippers they're like a bit like a flatbread type thing it's like a flat bread type thing but then first they folded it in half. Yep. And then they like started rolling it and the guy had so many started. And then so then the other pissed off guy came back and was like unrolling and unflattening them and he's like, it was like a stack of paperwork and he like took it back to the back room and it's like, oh so good. And I'm just looking at you and you're still standing there. Yeah, I gotta send all these pictures of Eric I took to the Slack. Oh cool, thanks. I mean, you have reception back here. It'll send eventually you should go on hungry dog hungry dog Wi-Fi, bro

Great now everyone knows what the I know You just Gracie dust Now you go go in the back room and we die yeah, it would have fell on the floor Now you go in the back room and die. Yeah, it would have fell on the floor. What was I doing? Teaching me about the food. Whataburger Buffalo Ranch Chicken Strip Sandwich. Teacher style.

Load up on extra napkins before you sink your teeth into three crispy Whataburger Chicken, registered trademark strips, smothered in Whataburger's original spicy buffalo sauce and topped with cool buttermilk ranch and two slices of Monterey Jack cheese all on a five inch bun. We talked about-

This picture's went through, by the way. We talked about buffalo sauce being like- Yeah, like Michael, you were saying you're on a bit of a kick? Yeah, I've been on a buffalo, an adult life buffalo kick. I like them. I like the spicy buffalo. It's like my favorite wing with blue cheese Yeah, it's nice and hot and then you get the cool sensation of the blue cheese. Mm-hmm

I like combo. I definitely like a blue cheese more than a ranch that goes with the Buffalo Why right into the microphone? You went like this. He like didn't He didn't move. Oh my god. That was really special. That was really something. Are you sending more pictures? Yeah I got three more.

It wouldn't let me send more. How many did you send? Thirteen? Are you sending thirteen photos? I mean look you were emoting a lot. Look look you more. How many did you send 13? Are you sending 13 photos? You were emoting a lot, dude He's praying to God right there That looks like that meme yeah, yeah, I was praying that we get the fuck out of here. He's pulling all his facial hair off Press material yep quote the Buffalo ranch chicken strip sandwich was an instant hit when it was first introduced What a burger chief marketing officer Scott huddler says since then our fans have consistently demanded We bring it back and we've been happy to oblige

While this unique flavor combination will be a welcome return for many guests with a capital G We're also thrilled to introduce it to our new markets I don't know if they I don't know if it was consistently in demand and they were happy to oblige, why get rid of it? Yeah. I mean, you're- You gotta create that false demand. Yeah. I mean, you're totally right.

But also- Dude, we should stop doing 100% eat for a couple weeks and people will be like- A couple months. Yeah. They'll just be like, Brad, you finally take that vacation! But they have to keep paying us. Oh, okay. Keep paying for the Patreon. We're just gonna not make it.

We won't take it. Well, it's part of it. We it work for that part. That's part of the joke. Yeah, it's not funny If you don't continue subscribing right right we go back and no one's there like you totally straight face. It's part of the joke. Yeah It's not funny. If you don't keep paying Waka Waka I'm rock No No, I didn't crush I crushed here It's a little more smooshed

Unique flavor Unique flavor combination? Yeah, buffalo Dude, the ranch The ranch gets drowned out Did you taste the ranch at all? Zero No, ranch at all? Zero. No, not at all.

Which I'm fine with, I don't care for ranch. I don't know why you put it in there. What do you say? We can try it with blue cheese next time. What does he mean by next time? Next time we go get the sandwich, idiot. Because it's going to go away and then when it comes back we have to eat it again. Tomorrow we have to get more brownies.

For my wife. For my wife. These are my brownies. Wait, can I bring him that one for her? You can have it. And then get a new one for himself. She's folding clothes and he just fucking whips a brownie at her.

It's already open. I washed my shirt. It's clean now. Well, we can see it's clean now. It's clean now. But that's what we think about Whataburger without giving it a score, but we want to know what you think about Whataburger in a segment we call You Review. Do we need like a little audio drop or something for this?

What do you want it to be? Nick Schicke is like no. Nick Schicke is like no. Nick, you're the guy, you're the guy who would have to put it in. Yeah, but he's just gone. No, we don't need it. That would take a second. Yeah.

You review. There we go. That's definitely not what we're going to do. It needs like a little bit of debt. Debt. You review. Do you want to just hit the- You hear that?

You want to pay for that is what he said. Just play something on the piano. Hang on. Play something on the piano. Hang on. Play something on the piano real quick. Michael, hold up the microphone for him. Are you sure? Do you want to take my microphone? Pretty good. It definitely fits the theme of U-Review. Dude, I thought you were about to

start Rage Quit. That's pretty good. Let me get to these reviews! I'll start. Okay, go for it. Corey T. been here three times in the last month. Dang. First went inside, waited 40 minutes inside while the fulfilled online and drive-through

before in-house. Cool. Went back a week later and sat in drive-through behind one car for 25 minutes, then another 15 for my order that was wrong. Went in tonight, July 21st, 2023, ordered a burger and onion rings, waited 20 minutes with two cars in front of me, and then another 10 when I got to the window. Double check the order! Dot dot dot dot got fries instead of rings and told to pull around for the correction.

Dot dot dot. Took my money back and will never go back to whatever a might-be burger wants to give you and wait forever! Enjoy never having the money of a 20-year customer again. You guys want to go to whatever a might might be burger? That guy is going back. Yeah, 100%. I went went last night, shot me in the leg, took forever, went back the next day. Triple bypass surgery took too long. Went back later that night three times in a month and they've been, he waited 40 minutes inside while the fulfilled online and drive through before in house.

Yeah. And he still went back. Yeah. He's living at this fucking place. Yeah. This guy is done at the yellow rose. He goes across the street. No, no, no.

He gets thrown out of the yellow rose. He does. And that's why, that's why gets thrown out of the yellow rose. He does. And that's why... Oh my god. That's why... I just read the first sentence of that. Oh boy.

Oh boy. Oh boy. Yeah. Okay. I was just going to say, that's why it's like taking so long, because when you go at night, if you go after 10pm to any water burger... Oh my god. That's on you.

It's a... I mean... That's absurd. But you're right. It does suck, but it is on you. You're I mean, it's an hour. But you're right. But it is our toy. It's an hour minimum. I know that. It's why I won't go there. Yes, I have one near my house is a nightmare. Does it suck?

Yes. But it's like that every time. So don't go. If I go there, I'm like, it's going to be bad. And that's if there's no cars, if there's cars like fucking going to Wendy's. You know what would that's fuck this abort. Yes. You know, it would be like that.'s like, fuck it, I'm going to Wendy's. You know what would that's fuck this abort.

Yep. You know, it would be like that. I feel like growing up in Southern California was in and out. Like, oh, dude, there's one though, my local in and out. I think they've just recently like redone it. But like, it was one of the drive thru ones. Yeah. And it's like right off of a busy Boulevard. Norwalk Boulevard. It's fucking like like the little driveway to get in and then the order thing is right there and there's two lanes so if there's two cars ordering you're in the street. Yes. I hate that shit. That is every in and out. I was like scared to

see how much traffic there's going to be to order there. Every time. Every time. I don't feel like I'm in the fast food restaurant ecosystem. No, I'm just on the road. I'm parked on the road as cars come up behind me. When they opened the one on Airport here, like Airport and 45th, well, they did a Disneyland-style queue through the parking lot because they knew that this is such a problem. The one growing up where in Santee,

where Mega64 Studio used to be, we would go all the time. But late at night, it would snake through and back and up the parking lot. And instead of going back down like the deeper parking lot, people would just pull in. And then it would back up onto the street. And then the workers would go set out cones on the street. And it was just like, yup.

And it was like, this is where you queue. This is it. They get the employees, they come out, and they have to put a badge on. It's like certified. They get deputized. Yeah. It's weird.

They get given guns. It would technically work for in and out in the city. Yeah. They pull out guns, get in line. What do you want? Alright, next year review. Who's this from? This is Colton B. Not to be confused with Colton D. Our good friend from Laser Team.

The most famous thing he's done. There was a pain customer who fainted and hit his head in the store. And the employees literally did nothing to help. He could have been dying or seriously injured and no employee even bothered to move from behind the counter or call 911. Doesn't sound like you did much either Colton. I think Colton might be the man. Don't worry there's more. The only assistance that man got was from other customers and then when another got angry and started asking why none of them help They called the police on them and attempted to have him kicked out this stores employees Not only have the worst customer service I've ever seen but a concerning lack of empathy for other human beings. Don't go here

This was this is a very lucid one. Yeah, and it's like all the grammars, right? The punctuation, this actually seems like a concern citizen. Yeah. But also, like, to play devil's advocate, they were working. Now, here's the thing. The customers weren't working. They had free time, dude. I thought.

Yeah, they don't get paid to help the guy who hit his head. What do you guys call the ambulance? You're over there sitting around doing nothing. My phone's in a locker. I'm on the grill. I've got onion rings in the deep fryer over here. The people at Whataburger today were nice. Everyone was very helpful, and it was totally fine.

I feel like if you got knocked out, they might have helped. I think that if that had happened, those were the people I would have gone to last. Like, the employees are the people I would have gone to last for help. Any of the day labor guys, any of the other people that were in there.

Oh, the guys with the vests. Dude, 100%. The high vest. The vests that were in there. Any of those guys, they have seen way worse than whatever's gonna happen at that Whataburger. And they'll be like, we got you, don't worry about it. Yeah.

That's right, we're Whataburger apologists. And also- Right, we're Whataburger boot lickers. Yeah. I really like- Mixed with spicy ketchup liquor. water burger apologists and also water burger bootlickers. I really like a spicy ketchup liquor. I really like the idea of somebody asking, why didn't you call an ambulance and water burger going, I'm going to call the fucking police on you? Because you know, that's how that conversation was. Yeah.

Maybe they were being belligerent. Yeah. Who knows what? What? I will say though, I just like, I mean, you get great point though of this guy sitting on I can't believe did nothing to help Did you call? Yes? What I gotta be honest. What do you why are you? What a burger because they're behind the counter. They're the ones with all the power They can call the bank. Yeah, you know

There's somebody in there who couldn't wait to call 911. They were already on the phone. There was some person like, ah, like calling it. One time I witnessed. I go, do it. Nah, I'm good. One time I got it. I witnessed something,

I think it was like somebody having a medical emergency while driving and they kind of just like, it was actually on like 969 over by that. Oh wow. Like Bolero. Yeah. They just like veered off into the. Oh wow. Polaroid. Yeah. They just like veered off into the. Oh my god.

Yeah, into like the bus stop area. And like went like down. That's kind of what Jessica Alba did in trigger warning. If you insist. She did. She just kind of just. And I was like, I just witnessed this happen. It happened like right in front of me.

So I like pulled over and I called 911 immediately and told them like where it was and what happened. And they were like, oh yeah, somebody already called it in so there's always somebody Yeah, yeah, if you feel like the need to go for it. Yeah, but also yeah, if they know about it already Just get off the phone as I told you I told you this about the guy I saw the other day 930 p.m.. Who was naked beaten on the side of a daisies with a traffic sign. Yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah called 3-1-1. Uh-huh. Yeah Information about moderate yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Called 311. Uh-huh, yeah. Yeah, I've done that. They would have information about that. Moderate, like maybe someone could check this out.

A non-emergency, yeah. He seems like he knows what he's doing. He's done this before. Right. I just wanna make sure everyone's cool with it. This is like his thing. I was in an Uber coming back from somewhere and someone was talking about a coffee shop

and I went to look at the coffee shop and then I was just like, I saw a guy just kinda holding a Holding a sign I was like that's weird And then he starts hitting the side of the days in with the sign and I'm looking and I'm looking and I thought I was Wearing shorts and then I realized I'm like, oh that dude's fucking naked Like he was just he was tanned and so he had white cheeks Yeah, and just like dick out just like kind of great. Yeah, but he looked like dick out, just like kind of grazed. But he looked like, he didn't look like a street person.

He looked like a crazed drug person. Oh. You know, like- He was on his own bender of like a different level. Right. He went up. Right. It was like no garments of clothes left on him or near him.

And it was like, huh. And then I go, I just go, that dude's fucking naked. And the Uber driver goes, what? The guy hadn't said a word for the whole ride and was just like, and so somebody calls 311 and they're talking. And I don't remember what the operator was saying,

but they were like, does he look like he's in distress? And the driver goes, he looks like he's on meth. On de meth. But somebody's always calling. Yeah. Right, yeah. Guess what? I'm sure if we didn't call, somebody at the hotel

was probably calling. Oh, absolutely. I'm hearing if we didn't call somebody at the hotel was probably calling. Oh, absolutely outside my Fuck is thumping. Oh naked guy, huh? All right Okay, it's good. Three one one's the right thing to call instead of nine one one. I think yeah, it seemed extreme Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it was the crazy part was it was like what I was like 915. Oh It was pretty early. It was dark out, but it was not late.

That guy was PCPing at like four? Yeah, he started early. It could have been a yesterday thing. The sun had only been down for 45 minutes. He didn't seem drunk. Wow. He was quite energetic. Yeah, yeah, yeah, interesting.

Insisting indeed. Well that's good. One more year of you. Omar D. Okay. I guess Yelp doesn Well, that's good. One more review. Omar D. Okay. I guess Yelp doesn't matter when it comes to what a burger. Doesn't matter when it comes to anything. Really doesn't.

I order a double meat with cheese, and for some reason they always give me a double cheese order. They didn't ask me for double cheese. I'm fit. I only ordered cheese, not double cheese. But they always do this. Not just with this location, but in San Antonio and McAllen, where I'm from. Can we all get together and protest Water Burger over charging people for double cheese when you

don't order it? I think it's mandatory for employees to automatically charge for it. I mean, it's already a very fatty, height calorie burger. Why would they want you to eat extra cheese for the extra money they get for the extra slice of cheese? I'm fit! This slice of cheese will ruin me. Let me explain this you fucking moron. Because you're adding an extra patty. You add an extra slice of cheese. That's how that works. You get one patty, one cheese. Two patties, two cheese. A double cheeseburger is not just double patty. Are you fucking stupid? Also, you're fit? I'm fit. What do you think the cheese is doing?

What do you think the cheese is doing? It's a slice of cheese. It's a singular slice of cheese. It's not within my macros. You're getting a double cheeseburger at Whataburger and you're concerned over a single slice of American cheese. If you're fit, then it shouldn't be a problem. Yeah. If you're worried about it. Oh, I'm sorry about the extra three grams of protein. Yeah. His whole day's fucked now from his macros. What I really like- What? There's so much- We should protest. So there's so much to enjoy. We're all banding together. I will burn businesses to the ground

if double cheeseburgers came with one slice of cheese. That's outrageous. What I like about this is there's so many things to enjoy. How much money is it gonna save? Yeah, right. It's probably 50 cents tops for a slice of cheese. There's so many things to enjoy with this one, but what I really like, besides I'm fit in all,

and let's boycott whatever. They always do this. Not just at this location. Right, no shit. But in San Antonio. Show this every restaurant. Why do they always do this? It's not a conspiracy dude.

Dude, I get, I go to that Jew boy slider truck. Yes, yeah. That's fucking amazing. Yeah, and I realized cause I go to that Ju-Boy slider truck. Yes, yeah. That's fucking amazing. Yeah, and I realize, because I suck them down, I always just get doubles now, because it's cheaper. It's like, it's like, we'll go, it's fine. It's like a couple dollars cheaper. If I'm going to get four burgers, I might as well get two double cheeseburgers.

So I always get doubles. And one time I went, I was just like, let me get two double cheeseburger vatos. And he's like, you want double meat? And he's like, do you just want double meat? Do you want double cheese too? And I was like, yeah, I want double cheeseburger vatos and he's like he's like you want a double meat and he's like do you just want double meat you want double cheese too and I was like yeah I want double cheese too yeah insane thing to ask he was like sorry I got this review yeah the guy only asked me one time ever yeah and thank God he asked but again it's in the opposite he asked like do I only want one or two want two was of course I want two. But even that was the anomaly.

No one's ever asked me that there ever again. And I was disgusted when he asked me. So this guy coming here saying this is outrageous. I love, this is a great example of the saying like, if you meet one asshole a day, you've run into an asshole. If you meet several assholes a day, you're probably the asshole. It's the same thing where it's like, I don't know why every place I go to keeps doing this.

It's not you, dude. Dude, every sentence too, it's just like, da da da da, da da da da, da da da da, I'm fit. That's it, that's the whole sentence. I'm fit. I'm fit, period. And then just continues talking. Why would they want you to eat extra cheese for the extra money?

A small cherries jubilee. Junior bacon cheese. Junior bacon cheese. I want you to take two of those. I don't remember what he's ordering. It's like, you know that five piece, make it a three piece, and take the other two and shove them up your ass. Take that slice of two and shove them up your ass. Take that slice of cheese and shove it up your ass. I'm fit.

I wish he was like getting in other like, like descriptors of like, it turns into like a dating profile thing. I'm fit, you know, by McAllen, where I'm from. Five foot 11. Five foot 11. Basically six foot. Basically, yeah.

If that matters to you. Work in 11. Basically six foot 11. Basically, yeah. If that matters to you. Work in finance. Yeah. No politics. About me. Oh, okay. Unvaxxed and proud. Yeah.

No politics. Usually the most political. Right, yeah. Can't shut up about it. Speaking of that, that reminded me on my way over here. I was behind a car at a red light and I saw that they had a little like lift light in their car. I could see it on their dash. I go, oh cool, they're just a lift driver. I could see like they got their phone on the suction cup and then I'm like,

what are they doing on their phone? Because it's not a map, it's not a route thing, it's pictures and then you start swiping. Oh nice! Oh yeah! This guy's on Tinder while he's driving! That's awesome! And then I saw there were other people in the car and I was like, he's on Tinder with people in the car!

This guy's multi-tasking! He's multi-tasking, yeah! Maybe he's looking for the people in his backseat. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Seeing if it comes up on you, and then swipe. Swipe? Okay, well that's what everyone else thinks about Whataburger, but what do you guys think? It's time to review the food, the Whataburger Buffalo Ranch Chicken Strip Sandwich.

My favorite thing from Whataburger, the thing that I get, it's like a comfort food, is the BBQ Chicken Strip Sandwich. Texas toast, three strips of their chicken. Registered trademark. Registered trademark. And then barbecue sauce and the same cheese that's on this one. And it's really good. It's a great, like, you don't care what you're eating. I'm on a Jack cheese. That's what it is. I just knew it was a white cheese. Yeah. It's a great you don't care what you're eating kind of meal. Oh yeah. And I think this one would be better if it was on Texas toast. I, it's a great you don't care what you're eating kind of meal. Oh yeah.

And I think this one would be better if it was on Texas toast. I don't like the five inch bun as much. Interesting. Okay. I also really wanted the ranch and the buffalo to kind of work together a little bit better. It's basically a buffalo chicken sandwich. It's a buffalo chicken for sure. There's no ranch to be found.

I feel like I'm kind of on the other end where like most Buffalo doesn't do it for me these days. Oh, okay. Most Buffalo sauce. It has to be like a from like a good quality place. I think like the Wingstop ones are pretty good. Mm-hmm. But like most fast food places, it's just a little overpowering. I'll say Whataburger's was pretty good, but again, it just overpowered the whole sandwich for me. I think other people are really gonna enjoy it.

I don't think it's for- I know he did. I don't think it's for me. I think other people are really gonna enjoy it. I don't think it's for me. I don't think it's for me, which is why I'm giving it a lowish score of a... I'm gonna go 68. Okay, that's not low at all. I was waiting for a 30 or 40. No, no.

Because I can appreciate it. I get where you're coming from. Yeah, I get where you're coming from. Presentation made. Yeah, I get where you're coming from. Presentation and like eat, unwrap it, you dive right in. And I will say and Nick was right. He kept going, they cooked it well. I mean, sometimes it's chicken. Sometimes not, but sometimes it's a little dry.

Sometimes the buns a little stale. Everything was perfect today. I will say you guys go there enough to know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They the chicken was crispy on the outside, real soft. And Everything was perfect today. You guys go there enough to know, I guess. The chicken was crispy on the outside, real soft. It was just soft. It was soft, but not mush. Sometimes it goes too far and it's mush. It was juicy, soft, and to Eric's point,

like you just wanted to keep tasting it and swallowing it. And it never was like, this is the hard part of the chicken where you got to like bite a little harder. Oh yeah, like it's grisly or something. Yeah, no gristley or something. Yeah, no gristles to be found. It was pretty fucking good. I really enjoyed it.

I think I would have preferred it on the Texas toast as well, but the Texas toast would, it would reduce the slopability of it sliding down your throat, because you actually have to, so you'd have to be more like a human being. You would like that more.

It's hard to go, like Nick, if it's Texas toast. Get back, Nick. Uh-huh, uh-huh. You would like that more. It's hard to go like Nick if it's Texas Toast. You can't pack me. You have to bite and chew, not bite and swallow. Which is kind of what this was. And it's like, I'll digest it later. But I did enjoy it. It was a pretty fucking good sandwich. Water Burger, usually a pretty solid restaurant. I'm going to give it an 84. Wow. I enjoyed it. 76. Average score. I mean, much better than the breakfast Yeah, um I'm gonna give it I'm gonna give it an 84 Wow I enjoyed it 76 average score I mean much better than the breakfast bowl. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I think that's a good Fucking around with shit. This shouldn't be fucking around with yeah, this they didn't really fuck around with much

It's not like in a crazy invention, but they have good sandwiches. They have good chicken. Yeah, this is their wheelhouse this Yeah, it's like the water burger burger. Yeah, This is their wheelhouse. This sandwich is like their wheelhouse. Everyone loves the Whataburger burger. Yeah. I don't like their burgers that much. I think their burgers suck. And I don't like their buns. So like anything that doesn't have the burger or their buns.

Okay. Which is why I like the Texas toast chicken strip sandwich. My not. I had that barbecue bacon burger a couple times. I don't know if you remember that. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, you had it a couple times. Quite a few times. From what I remember. Go back and listen to that. That, yeah, yeah. Yeah, you had it a couple times. Quite a few times. Uh-huh.

From what I remember. Go back and listen to that. That was a different Michael thing. Hey, I'm fit. Yeah. Why do you want me in there, please? What type of cheese? It's a conspiracy.

My complaint with this sandwich. I like long walks on the beach. Would be, would be the, like, if I was eating it in my car, it would drip everywhere. No way. And you can't eat this in your car It's drip city now. They weren't I will be honest. They I'm glad they were being truthful. They're like you better get some fucking napkins Yes, I mean, yeah

I used like I used like five now. Yeah eating that one. Yeah But that's just keeps whispering hell. Yeah, I'm on everything. It was good. Hell. Yeah, it was messy. Hell. Yeah I used to have napkins. Hell. Yeah, I associate this restaurant'm on everything. It was good. Hell yeah. It was messy. Hell yeah. I used to have napkins. Hell yeah. I associate this restaurant with- I washed my hands after it. Hell yeah.

Yeah, my hands stink of buffalo still. Big time. So that is, that's our review of Whataburger. Jordan, do we have a 100% fan? We do. Amazing. If you want to be a 100% fan and get a shout out on this show, you can.

This is the last one, right? No. No, this is the last one. So if you sign up, you'll be the next one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You'll probably be the next one if you sign up right now. I think this is the last one. OK, this is from Anthony.

OK. In the field that says, do you have a specific way to pronounce your name, just spelled his name out and kind of did it in the SpongeBob the spongebob like mocking kind of way So it kind of reads like Anthony Yeah, he's like making fun of you yeah fuck All right, this is a hammering and it says Hey, can we even say this on air? I don't know you're one reading it

I this is absolutely horrid, my eyes hurt reading this. Okay. Anthony can't- you can't say things like that. Jesus! To food podcasters, we have feelings too. That's literally what it says. No! What the fuck! That was- hey.

I was ready to rocko this. I was- He was sweating. Dude, I'm like, well, that's Jordan. This is crazy. What did he say? It's one of the pretty fun ones. That was a good one.

The nice thing there is, though, I think if anyone, Jordan would be the first to not read something. Yes, yeah. So it's safe with him. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's true. Yeah, that's why you bought it. That's why you bought it.

That really got me. I'm like, well, what are we about to do? You got betrayed again. Damn it. Good job. Bet really got me. What are we about to do? What about the phone you got? You got betrayed again. Damn it. Good job. Betrayed me. If you want to be 100% fan,

you can go to patreon.com slash 100% eat and sign up, but you can also sign up to watch the Michael Jordan podcast, a podcast that comes out every Friday. Always a slam dunk. Patreon, nothing but net, Patreon only every week. You get a wet your whistle with a little clip that we put on YouTube, but you see the whole thing there.

It's been a lot of fun. Been just sort of freewheeling, finding different stuff to do. I think we should- Yeah, it's called scraping the barrel. I think we should go to- Not prepping. Oh yeah, he calls it freewheeling, having fun.

I call it fucking- What? Throwing shit at the wall. Huh? The one that, the one we have to record after this goes after last, we're still on a time jump. Why? We're still on a time jump?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because we have to record one more to catch up. So I think if we have time later this week, I think- Oh, thank God you didn't say today. No, no. He's gotta be out of here by one o'clock. I think we should go to a Jew boy burger. Oh shit.

To the sliders? Yeah, get some sliders. Dude, if the guy working there sees me, he'll be like, what's up? It's like the outdoor, we're at like the outdoor spot. If we were like the little red boots we talked through. Okay, Nick is way too into it. But that makes me think it's a violent crime.

I mean, he was whispering earlier, let's go, let's go, let's go. I think this will be good. I think it worked. Yeah, oh, we can get the orange whips. Uh-huh. Oh. Oh, dude. This rocks.

I want an orange whip. See, I know things. I got a one wheel. This is a good idea. Now I know what Austin is. Yep. That's right. It only took me that long.

It took 13 years. Yeah, dude. Turns out when you just go around town. Dude, I'm going all around. I know the things and the places. Go to store.100%eat.com for merch. Check out the shirts. Jordan's wearing one.

Nick's wearing the exact same one. You can follow us at 100%eat on Twitter and on Instagram. Stay up to date with everything. But if you join the Patreon, even as a free member, you see everything that we post. It's the same. It's a repository. It's like a little newsletter for you.

Yeah, I really like it. It's more of a website than anything else. Yeah, but good. Don't call it newsletter. Dude, some people like newsletters. It's more of a website than anything else. Yeah. But good, don't call it newsletter. Dude, some people like newsletters. It's an exciting, active feed. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. I'm being honest, I've said this many times before. It's a cool zine. I've said this many times before. I actually really like the Patreon. I only look at all our shit through the Patreon app. Yes, you don't have to follow anything else. It's everything in one spot.

It's there, it's in order at the same time. Dude, imagine having to go to like Instagram. I can, that was everything forever for the last 12 years. Yeah. It was in like nine different places. Consolidate it. It really sounds like a dumb like, and you can get it all in one place.

I don't give a fuck about that. I'm like, I can get it all in one place. It's really convenient. It's how I, who doesn't keep track of our own content, can actually keep track of our content. Very easy. You can also send us stuff to a PO Box. We have it.

PO Box 143241 Austin, Texas. I want to call it a P.O. Box. What the fuck? It might be because it's been getting stinky. I haven't checked it in a couple days. 143241 Austin, Texas. 78714. Send us stuff. We have some stuff.

My house is getting filled with these things that we've received. These snacks. That's why you've got to build one of these. Dude, your backyard's big enough. This went long. Yeah. Long, way longer than I thought. I thought we were gonna struggle for this one.

This was a good one. Why? Why would you think we would struggle? You know, for the amount of time, for the amount of time that we've done this show, there are some where I just go, I think we're gonna struggle. How many have we made? I don't know.

What have we ever struggled to ever? We have Michael. Like, all we need to do is be like, okay, we're rolling. Right, right. That's's the the struggle should be stop Yeah, yeah, I need to stop it. Well, that is the struggle. So let's end it now Fuck you. Don't tell us what to do. All right time to start part two. All right, so so turn your paper About subway just for another two minutes Right and subscribe and tell a friend about the show

where we eat food and rate the food. Goodbye.