100% Eat - We Eat the Entire Denny's Beetlejuice Menu %% Denny's Afterlife Beetlejuice Menu

Episode Date: September 3, 2024

Our Heroes venture to a motel adjacent Denny's for a ghastly afternoon delight in the new Beetlejuice Menu. Do these terrifying treats unlive up to our expectations or will these fiendish foods end up 6 feet under. Gotta listen to this one and find out about the Fun Zone if ya know what I mean bud heh heh heh. Prepare your ears for a podcast but your mouth for a special tip as we take on Denny's once again. Good fright! New merch coming to http://100percenteat.myshopify.com Support us directly https://www.patreon.com/100percenteat where you can join the discord with other 100 Percenters, stay up to date on everything, and get The Michael, Jordan Podcast every friday. Follow us on IG & Twitter: @100percenteat Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What does possible sound like for your business? It's more cash on hand to grow with up to 55 interest-free days. Redefine possible with Business Platinum. That's the powerful backing of American Express. Terms and conditions apply. Visit mx.ca slash business platinum. Welcome to 100% Eat. Michelle, we're going to try every fast food restaurant to let you know if you need it. You probably do. I'm your Izzy D host.

Michael Jones alongside my... Oh boy. You're not Fred Durst? Izzy D co-host. Jordan Swizz-Wizz-Wierrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr That's a great movie Well, it's know the crow West border lanes Ka-ka I saw the crow guess what why so did I did you really? Know it you know if you were watching and going this sucks You know I've already seen it and here's what I'm gonna. Do I'm gonna buy that fucking jacket. It's a goon on it Best part of the movie I'm gonna buy that fucking jacket. It's a goon on it

Is he a goon or is it in the new love dude all of the new parlance of gooning all of his clothes are Expensive and look like and large and it's like oh, it's like he just found these things and it's like this these These clothes are so expensive. I really don't want to keep talking about it because I have questions and I don't want to know the answer to them. They're in her friend's penthouse. That's like a billionaire and lets a crackhead live there. Nothing about this movie makes sense. It rocks. It's so bad in a way where you go, why are we wasting our time with this?

And then it goes into the second act and you go, why are we wasting our time with this and then it goes into the second act and you go why are we wasting our time with this and you finally get into the third act and there's one fucking awesome sequence where the crow goes fucking crow mode oh yeah he gets shot like 987 times. It is so fucking cool like I'm watching it with a buddy and we're just going, this got so fucking rad, what happened? And then it stops doing it and never does it again? It's insane. Clearly you don't know the crow. Dude, he knows the crow. You gotta know the crow and the crow can only get shot 987 times once. No, they make it very clear early on like like, you can regenerate, but it hurts. And then it doesn't.

They are, they're like, then he just becomes invincible. All the pain, like, when he gets shot or stabbed, he feels all of that pain. And that's evident the first four or five times something happens. And then this opera house sequence happens, and he is god-chromo'd. Yeah, he's god-chromo crow mode and he just brings a sword. He decides that he's a samurai sword guy. Cause he just finds one and goes, I'mma use this. It is.

And then he just starts chopping. What he does with the sword is, if it came out in 2007 on DVD, everyone would love the crow. Yeah, it was it was ultimate Like mauled ninja warrior. There's there's parts where he chops people with the sword and you go that's crazy And there's other times where he chops people the sword and you go that's too realistic. Don't show it like that It's so cool. They had some parts like that in

What was it the last warriors? What was it called? Last Warriors, Walden? Walden City. Yeah. Yeah. Where it's like people would fall on their necks and it'd be like, it's all like played up. Yeah. Not even for comedy, but just for the stunt work of it.

Yeah. But nobody landed right in that movie one time. It was always just people going, boom, like neck first. And then getting up and fighting again. Just like, ow, that looked like it hurt. Me and Jordan saw this Hong Kong action movie where the first two acts are so grounded and emotional. And then the third act, one of the bad guys has superpowers

and then that's what they do the rest of the movie. And it's so fucking cool. I wouldn't say it's all grounded at the beginning. They just bring in the magic at the end where it's like, okay So I was like kind of suspending my disbelief and that like these people were just like super strong on it come food And then they were like, oh, he's got magic powers. He has magic powers and it's so cool He is the master and it's like the crow. He's the one guy's going crow mode But he's let's not bring it back to the crow

Oh, did you wish we're gonna compare the crow to anything we should compare it to beetle juice Here's the thing though. Here's the thing Jordans knocking it But what if he was walking around and there was just a grackle flying around that is just there just I've played Diablo 2. Yeah, I know what that's like But the crackle would the crackle would lead you on a path of vengeance It would just shut like it would know it would lead you on a path of vengeance. It would just show, like, it would land. It would lead me on a path to french fries. Yeah. That's, dude.

And an H&B parking lot. Somebody needs to draw, Jordan is the crow, but it's the Grackle. And he's like fucking, the crow in the crow movie. Is it a crow mode, it's crack mode. In the crow movie, instead of him getting mystical face paint that like, is like a representation of who he is

He grabs he grabs a bunch of black tattoo ink and starts rubbing it all over his face Then he pokes a mirror with a sword. It's the best Me yeah, why did he do that? Why did he do that? Why did he do that? I don't yep. I would like real glass I would like my effort my effort to get on track mm-hmm to be noted. Oh the Beetlejuice. Yeah Yeah, no, I understand that way that was a clear. That's twice. Don't do it again unless it's no Yeah, he's already. Yeah, he's already got to be on the board again. Yeah his but his mics not even plugged in yeah Like our little brother's like sure you can play it's two players and to Jordan's point one more thing about the crow yeah What happens when the crow dies

Unless he falls out of what it what Michael, Michael, Michael, question. What if his love is not pure? Oh, if his love is not pure, then he won't heal and he'll die. And then go, come on, and then go, alright, one more try. One more try, and we'll send you back up. And then his whole job is to do this, and push him. Stop shoving me! The crow gets his ass kicked for so much of the movie

and pushed around by people the whole time. Sounds like a pushover. He is. He sucks. So it's Bill Skarsgard. Bill Skarsgard, right? And they do the thing which now no modern movie can escape because everyone is like fucking ripped,

shredded in shape. And that's just Bill Skarsgard has no plot in this film whatsoever, no reason. The man is in like a mental asylum. Yes. And is just like, kind of like a little bitch. And he's like, I don't talk to nobody. And he gets bullied.

And he's just kind of like a emo-y nerdy guy. And then he takes his shirt off and he's like the most shredded guy ever. And I I'm like that doesn't make any sense at all. No. Plot. Nope. He's like a junkie. Yeah. And you're just like excuse no nothing okay. The saddest part at the beginning has been worse. His abs are insane. Christian Bale would never. No. It's dude this is so crazy and also I saw someone online go like I think the most confusing thing about the crow is that it starts and he's in woke prison.

Everyone's wearing pink matching, like sweatshirts and sweatpants and doing jumping jacks and in therapy. And you're like, what's this alluding to? Like, what's this supposed to be? Maybe he's in Sweden. If you were actual rehabilitation. If you were accused of being late,

even though you were here on time and you were in the parking lot, step into the circle. That's right. Stop. If you were told that you were abusing the bonkers board, step into the circle. If your keys were in the way step into

the circle and that's when me and Michael get in the middle we make a pact so we went to days we're reviewing the Denny's after like had to get to 920 could have done the crow I'm so glad somebody else so I was crying somebody else like it would have been anybody else nobody in this room. I know oh god. It was awesome. I'm crowin Were there no crow Restaurant tie ins there's missed it. I will say there's no there's no marketing. Yeah, there's hardly no crow we could Yeah, could probably do that eat crow is what you do when you were proven wrong, right? Mm-hmm and and and the you were proven wrong, right?

Mm-hmm. And the critics were proven wrong when number one at the box office was the Crow, right? Was it? Uh, there's no way. It could be. I couldn't tell you another movie that came out. I can tell you there's no way. It was probably Inside Out 2. Going on its 18th week. What I do when I'm proven wrong is I lash out.

Yeah. And I refuse to accept the results. That's what I do. Oh. when I do when I'm proven wrong is I lash out yeah, and I refuse to accept the results That's what I do. It usually works. Yeah, promo Yeah, so we did beetle juice thing at Denny's and it's not we've said it three times That was some of the bloods and the juices lose Yeah, I was doing I- Someone order me a milkshake! I was doing my best Beetlejuice in the restaurant and I was like, oh no, it sounds like Jeremy Farts. It sounded exactly like him.

Hey guys, Beetlejuice is here. It's funny because there's Jeremy Farts in every dish at Denny's. Yeah, oh my god. As a Jeremy Farts restaurant. Yeah, I love Denny's This Denny's that we went to is the same Denny's we went to on the first Denny's episode that we did No, remember all who cares? What a what was the first Denny's episode? We did. Oh, I don't know where we went to the restaurant I don't remember what it was. How do you know? I just remember that we went there. I think you're wrong No, we went we went I think my memory is correct in here. They and yours is wrong. He went there I think after he saw the first crow.

In 94? Yeah, and then he went to this Denny's. Like this branded Lee guy is really going places. And then I was at Denny's and they said you're never gonna believe what happened. Oh no. Past experience with Denny's? It's fucking Denny's dude, it sucks. Yeah, Denny's, I used to frequent Denny's as a child

and then... Who didn't as a child? And then realized it's bad! I was getting dragged to bad restaurants this whole time. Denny's was just the late night restaurant for us. I got dragged there for breakfast. Yeah, it was a lot of breakfast for me. We would go after a lot of stuff. Never been to a Denny's after midnight.

I never did adult Denny's. Like, oh really? It was also, you were pining, to my disappointment about diner culture, that's New Jersey. See, I don't have to. So everywhere was a diner. I don't have a lot of that.

We wouldn't go to Denny's. We wouldn't go to any, I went to the Rio Diner on Main Street. That was where we went as like- Jesus Christ, this is real Americana stuff. That was where we went as like- I'm Jesus, it's a real Americana style. That was where we went during high school and shit like that. We could walk there. I never had adult choice go to Denny's.

We would go to a Denny's that everyone, and I don't know why to this day, called Punk Rock Denny's, and I don't know why it was called that. Was it Punk Rock? Was it a nickname everyone gave it? It was just a nickname everyone gave it. It was just like, hey, we're going to Denny's. Which one? Punk Rock Denny's? And don't know why it was called that. Was it punk rock? No! Was it a nickname everyone gave it? It was just a nickname everyone gave it.

It was just like, hey we're going to Denny's, which one? Punk rock Denny's? And everyone would go yeah. And I don't know why that was what associated with it. That sounds stupid. It, what? Looking back at the time? Cool.

Yeah. Now? I'm sure when you're a freshman you're like yeah it's called punk rock Denny's. That's absolutely what it was. That's pretty funny. That's absolutely what it was. You're just like yeah that's punk rock Denny's. We's absolutely what it was. That's pretty funny. That's absolutely what it was. You're just like, yeah, that's punk rock Denny's. We're going to Denny's ironically.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then you would eat the trio fried food basket. It just, he did. He's not doing it ironically. No, he doesn't. He got a single crepe. He doesn't do anything ironically. Yeah, why did you get a crepe?

He gave me a crepe. Calories. I feel like there was only calories for everything we ordered. You wanna hear something funny? He changed his order. Yeah, why did you get a crepe? calories I Feel like there was a lot of calories. We all do it here something funny. Uh-huh. He changed his order Yeah, he did. He said he was gonna get you went you went change your order Yeah, he changed it right he said what he was gonna get and then he ordered something else I go you changed your order. He goes yeah I looked at how many calories it was and I said you could just not eat the whole thing and I stopped I was like, oh, it's you.

What were you going to get? The bonus. He was going to get a bonus. Oh, OK. And then instead, you ate all of the, say it three times. No. The Beetle Juicy Burger. Yeah, no, he ate the three, say it three times slam.

I'm already getting a headache from the sugar. You had one bite. I know, dude. It's too much. But that's what I said when we were eating it. We'll get into what this food was. It's the afterlife menu, it's all Beetlejuice themed. I can see the afterlife.

Make me the crow. As soon as I took a bite of those pancakes, I looked at Michael and I went, you're going to hate this. And speaking of like the chocolate like thing on the pancake, why did it take the whole movie for him to look like the crow? It takes so long. Be the crow! He could have been the crow in the second act. You know, he looked like the entire movie and Jordan's really interested in this part. He just looked like Jared Leto the whole movie.

The whole movie he looked like Jared Leto, tattoos all over his face, but not a personality that matched no his physical appearance No anyway, he wasn't edgy. No use like kind of like a soft kind hearted like he was a quiet spoken guy He was a dumb pussy you got his ass kicked the whole movie the whole movie There's a crow that watched him disappointed, then you're like now you bleed black blood Oh his face is gonna get all crowed up now No, no just used it tattooing. You're not doing and I went well that would wash off. Uh-huh He got hit by a bar like Denny's he got hit by a car and there was inside the car And then it was like a cool action sequence

And then they kicked his ass out of the car and that was the end of the sequence I'll say that was the most realistic part though when he was in the tunnel I got kicked out of the car broken bones splayed in the middle of the road Not a single person stopped like a hundred cars passed That's the most accurate part of the film no one would have stopped out you also don't quite know what city it is They don't name it, but it could be New York or Any European place because everyone everyone almost has an accent kind of new crow. It's not Chicago over here put it on the list. We should watch the crow

Dude, if we watch the crow, he's gonna be so bad. Oh, it sucks It sucks ass Genuinely Jordan genuinely not even enough in a fun ambulance kind of there is there's one sequence that makes you like jaw-dropping cool It takes too long to get there and the movie is like almost two hours So you'll just go already. Yeah. Oh, it's you'll just go. Why are we spending so much time? Do it? We get it Yeah, that's what you wish you wish that's what I was talking about. That's not even what I'm talking about. Uh, I wanna talk about Beetlejuice.

Okay. Alright. Are you excited? I have my tickets. I haven't, oh, do you? I haven't seen it. October 5th. By that I mean September 5th. Yeah, okay. I haven't seen the original Beetlejuice in forever. I thought you were gonna say ever.

Neither have I, and I'm not going to. So, I remember the cartoon Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, where like Lydia and Beetlejuice are friends. Yeah, they're hanging out. Yeah Yeah, and then you watch the movie and friends in the movie. They have a totally different kind of he's he's much more of an antagonist Uh-huh. He's not a rapscallion. He's trying to marry her. Yes Hey, come on, babe That's pretty much this whole thing. Oh the days her yes hey come on babe that's pretty much this whole thing those are the days that was sorry Lydia I gotta go I got a fortnight tournament

I gotta go he is showtime that that was the whole first movie I bet you can play as Beetlejuice in fortnight probably if not now then soon but that is like the whole first movies he's trying to marry her and then now this appears to be her coming back with her daughter Jenna Ortega yeah but now they're friends yeah to like say Beetlejuice three times and her husband is like he doesn't believe her or something I don't really understand I have no idea what the plot's going I found out when I went to see the crow yeah a giant like thing at Alamo I didn't know Wilm Dafoe's in it yes oh really yeah

I hope he's playing his character in the lighthouse I think he is he looks like a monster. Yeah, that would that would be the monster face Yeah, you like me lobster Don't worry we already talked about it. Don't worry. I haven't Why don't you go ahead and talk about it while I go put it on the bonkers? We're talking about it when I left And also write keys for yes, I just I shut the bathroom door and it just kept being a go where do you go? Where do you go? I don't know where you went? I thought you left. I thought you went out the front door

I was looking at the dented water cooler with disgust. I got $30 back Yeah, but I was like, where's a left wall we can put it up against? Well, what we'll do is we'll get a table to put there No, what we'll do is we get we get a wet zone Like the fun zone and we build a wall around the water cooler We slide it into it and we make the dries pay for it. Yeah, we call it the hydration station And we slide it in there the the three pieces of wood on it cost $12,000 But it's gonna look nice as shit. We're not paying for it. Haha. There were pictures from Denny's

Yeah, I'm just gonna get into the are we getting into the facts right now But it's gonna look nice as shit. We're not paying for it. Haha. There were pictures from Denny's Yeah, I'm just gonna get into the are we getting into the facts right now. We're gonna learn about Denny's somebody Somebody's going bonkers board. I don't know if it's him or you I don't remember. He's writing a lot Our last KFC episode as face jam was January 17th 2023 where we ate the Miami spice sandwich and received an average score of 69.5 It was a monkey-less episode. Nick was not- I didn't know they had that at KFC.

Yeah, shut up. The, uh, Nick was not there. We took our friend Armando. Yeah, that was a good episode. It was an Armando episode. I remember Armando going. And he did not record with us afterwards. No, he did not.

No, it was just the three of us. But I was fun to hang out with him. Yeah, it was a great time. He was excited. He had a great time at Denny's. It was a different Denny's than we went to. Yeah, we went to the one where it's like... Downtown? Just outside of downtown?

It's like about 15th Street. So yeah, just outside. But it's like old Airstream trailer outside. I don't really understand. It's also... It's connected to like a double tree or something. Like it's in the parking lot of like a hotel. Is that what Denny's does now? Because this's in the parking lot of like a hotel? Is that what Denny's does now? Cause this was in the parking lot of a motel. You know, that's probably a good strategy for them

because- I mean, why not, right? Yeah. Because that's what it felt like when we were driving up to this one. Yeah. Was like- We should call it Denny's worldwide.

Like we just pulled off the interstate. Dalek. Dalek. We just pulled off the interstate in the middle of nowhere, in like a desert, and there's the Motel 6 and the Denny's right next to it. Yep.

And I thought we were gonna be in for a bad time. No, it ended up being just fine. But especially because it would not show up on my map. Dude, that was crazy. I kept typing in Denny's and I was like, it looks like the closest one is three miles away. Right, and Eric was like, we're not going to that one. Nope.

And then the next one was like six or seven miles. Even further? And that wasn't good. And I'm like, how far does this fucker want us to go? Oh, it's around the corner. So he told me the address and I typed it in. And he goes, it's right here. Yeah.

Fucking crazy. I looked around. I was like, we're in the Denny's. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I see it. Did you see the guy who wasn't eating at the Denny's but definitely staying at the Motel 6, walking into the Denny's, past everyone,

and right into the bathroom for a long time There yeah, yeah, but check out this Denny's board or do they yeah, yeah He's been there for three days. Yeah, I already told him he's not allowed to use it anymore So you're gonna have to go to the Denny's yeah Yep, oh hey, we should keep I Will read the next fact right after this fun anecdote. About the crow? No. Damn. Do you want to send me back? Yeah, cuz I was done with it. I thought you were going back. I was at the bank. I was at the bank yesterday and

It was taking forever to set up this account, but finally I go I go you have a bathroom by the way And she's like yeah, yeah, I can take you, because there's like no bathroom for people to use. She holds your fucking hand? Well, we were there for hours opening this account, and had many conversations. Very friendly. Got many conversations about like her children,

and she was like, all right, I'll be the mom. And I looked at Alfredo and went, I'm going potty. And she had to like take me into the break room of the bank. What? And then the bathroom was in there. And I was just like, how close to the money am I? And then she had to wait in the break room for me to come out so she could walk me out of the not employee section.

It wasn't awkward for me. I was delighted. I don't understand how there's no public restroom. I was just thinking about it. You don't go to a bank very public restroom. I mean, I was just thinking about it. You don't go to a bank very often anyway, and you're rarely there long enough to need a bathroom. I don't think I've ever noticed a bathroom in a bank. But there's a place I feel like is like on the up

and up enough to have a bathroom. The bank should have a bathroom. Like if you're at the bank doing bank business, it's not a place that's like, sorry, no bathroom for here, you pleb, get out. If you're doing bank business, thank you for putting $10,000 in a new account, but you can urinate somewhere else.

If you're doing bank business, you should be able to do your business there also. You should be able to go to the goddamn bathroom. Yeah, yeah, they should let you do your business at the bank. This is ridiculous. Business of all kinds. I'm gonna go Chrome mode at the bank. Can we stop him? He has an account here

This is a good fact you're like this one Denny's has never been proved to not use magic in its food Creation fact taken from Denny's official blog post. What are we doing? That's the fact. What are we doing? That's what Denny's tells you about Denny's That's what they say. You know how I can prove it. They wrote that. Yeah Down called out calm down, but you on it for that Wow. He made a reference the bonkers board In 2013 Yeah, a San Antonio man was so upset with a slow service at Denny's that he set a Christmas tree display on fire as he was leaving the restaurant.

The man was arrested and sentenced to 10 years in prison in order to pay over $200,000 in restitution, and you thought the moons over Miami was expensive. Oh brother! These jokes. 10 years? Oh brother That's insane that's a lot that's the plea he took oh my if he didn't take the plea 25 years it burned down and kill everyone down the restaurant $200,000 Beyond us it was on public Yeah, this guy yeah, he was also like in the Air Force or something, so it's not like he was,

you know, he wasn't all there. He tried to set this thing on fire as he left and then it like burned down a bunch of the Denny's and there were people inside. So like they plead him down. So like endangered, our son endangering people. How many things can we put on top of this thing? I mean that makes sense.

Because that's the crazy, I've never been so mad at it. I've been to the Denny's in downtown San Francisco, the worst Denny's in the world. Ooh, we should go. Oh, it's... No, they just closed it down and I... I thank God. It's the worst one I've ever been to. The service there is so bad, and yet I didn't set anything on fire. Zero things got set on fire.

Yeah, but you could have. I mean, I'm not even like, again, setting things on fire. Zero things got set on fire. Yeah, but you could have. I mean, I'm not even like, again, setting things on fire. If you're gonna unleash your rage and set something on fire, just don't do it to a thing with people in it. Yes, and I think that's why... Because that makes it exponentially worse. That's why I got ten years in prison. That's why you get ten years in prison.

How do you like armed robbery and don't get ten years in prison? That's fucking crazy. There were some morbid facts about Denny's robberies and stuff that I did not include in here. They are fucked It's bad Who's robbing a Denny's? That's where all the cash is No, let's get to the next one

Wow Michael Michael, let's get to the next We're nearing the 10 year anniversary You good man? We're nearing the 10 year anniversary of that waiter getting his dick sucked Wonder what the legend is up to today probably something fucking hot The craziest part about that fact taken from Denny's The craziest part about that is... Facts taken from Denny's vlog? The craziest part about that is, it's such an insane thing. It sounds like something you would hear in high school that your friends make up and tell you.

But it happened and there's a video of it! There's a video! You can just Google it and find it! You can just look it up! And it's playing right now! You can just here's So you can just fight that shit's like no, I don't oh my god I I saw so I didn't watch are you allowed to watch that in Texas now? When I went to look up, I went to look it up because I wanted to see if there was any

new information. Yeah, that's why you looked it up. So I popped open my favorites. I pulled out the video and I checked the date. Been chomping to the bit to get back to Denny's. There was, somebody had broken down the video into three still images. It was one, the woman sitting at her table looking at the waiter and the waiter like and then the woman leaning into the guy blurred out and the waiter like

and then the water and then The last image is the way the biggest smile And the woman facing the camera like this It's so it's so fucking funny. It's insane. It's like a skit. It's insane, it is like a skit. And if you haven't seen the Denny suck off tip.

It's not just a woman and someone filming it. No, it's a whole booth of people. Yes, everyone is there. It's just like in the middle. It's just like in the middle. It's just hanging out. They're just in a booth of people! It's just like, in the middle! They're just hanging out! They're just in a booth at a Denny's! Could happen anywhere.

And that's what we're hoping every time we go out to eat! We're going over, but there's no way! Dude, that woman came over, that Peach doll, and Nick was like, uh-oh! Like, I... I can't believe both... There two two participants willing and went for it in the span of seconds It's awesome. It's like it's like this woman just going like I'll suck your dick and they got going okay I'm taking his dick off at work at Denny's in the restaurant with other people and then she does it

It's how legends are bad insane There are so many there are so many comments on reddit and stuff where people are going like I guess that waiter doesn't care About his job. He's getting fired and other people go in Denny's. It's fucking He probably thought this is the coolest way to quit. That's why I'm fucking out of here and everyone's gonna talk about me forever I mean everyone's going to talk about me forever. I mean, we certainly are. It's been 10 years. Oh my god.

I still can't believe that. It doesn't sound real. Oh, it's so awesome. All right. The final fact. Final fact. In 2024, the Crow remake. In November of last year, Feast American Diners, LLC,

a managing partner in 21 Denny's locations was ordered to pay $2 million in a false claims act after receiving the money in 2021 for COVID relief. Honestly, Denny should be paying us to eat there at this point. COVID relief, I'm just relieved we didn't get food poisoning. Hamburger. That's not how you say it. How do you say it, Jorg?

Yeah, you're supposed to go, I'm just relieved we didn't get food poisoning. Hamburger. You say that, he knows. I don't know what that is. Yeah, yeah, no, that was for Jorg. Why'm just relieved we didn't get food poisoning ham Burger say that's you know yeah, yeah, no that was for Jordan, but let me read it They're gonna sense favorite comedian. I said you should write Jordan say this part. Yeah, but then again you wrote KFC at the top So what do I expect? burger Like that he could wrote yeah, he just wrote hamburger Dude ham burger And he didn't even write it like that. He could have wrote hamburgers. He just wrote hamburgers. Yeah, he got it. God damn, dude.

Hamburger. Hamburger. Put him on the burger's border. I'll just write hamburger. Yeah. So they own 21 Denny's locations and they applied for this, hey, here's a bunch of COVID relief money.

You couldn't own more than 20. Oh shit. Whoops. Oopsie. You didn't own more than 20. Oh shit. Whoops. Oopsie. You think people wouldn't check? That's exactly what happened. Do you think we're too late? Do you think they went on the bonkers board

for going one over? Oh yeah. Oh, they went on the bonkers board. Do you think it's too late for us to get some of this COVID relief money? We should try to see how much free money we can get. Do you think we could free money? Maybe just squeak in?

Well, we own 22 Denny's, so. Oh, god damn it! If we could start another pandemic... We get it going and then cash in. And then free money. Mm-hmm. It's a pretty good idea. It's all in the interest of the end game.

And that doesn't even have to be right now. That's in a hundred years when we're still alive. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And so we... Remember COVID a hundred years ago? That's what I'm saying! Remember The Crow a hundred years ago? Oh my god I'm saying. Remember the Crow 100 years ago? Remember it.

Oh my God, we're still watching it. Yeah. The Crow franchise. I personally think they jumped the gun with the Crow 5. Yeah. Crow mode. I'm telling you, if Crow came out in 2007, it would have had so many DVD sequels.

It would have been crushing right now. Crushing. He really does become like the Chrominator at the end. Yeah. Oh yeah. Uh-huh. When he's like walking towards the camera and it's like da-da-da, da-da-da, da-da-da. He gets to the top of these big steps.

He gets all the way to the top. He is shot, I kid you not, a hundred times, 150 times. And he falls to his knees and he drops like this. But he's in love. And he goes like this. he's in love and he dropped I was like this his love is pure at this point And then and then like cuz you know you die like that you wouldn't fall over It's body weight just perfectly falls where he's on his knees

Yeah, and then a guy cuz people with guns what they do is they keep walking closer. Yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, he's an invincible guy with a sword and so they're like I'll shoot him a little bit Uh-huh. Let me check this out walking towards him and then he's like I got you. I'm not dead Yeah, and then he kills that guy too. Wow the chrome so cool At one point he gets stabbed with his own sword and then falls into okay It's like stabbing like through him and then he falls into a guy and kills the guy with the sword going through him Does that more than one? Yes, and then another guy picks him up so then he can't quite reach him with his gun

So he just shoots through his own chest to the guy behind him and kills him crow mode Nick wants to see it now. He also does anything where he puts the sword in the guy's oh my god that part was fucking crazy His mouth like Jollik my sorry snake. Oh Sorry snake. I like in Beetlejuice when they when they sing They like come yeah, you want to go on do you think they're gonna do that again in this new one? But I think it, and you want to go home. Do you think they're gonna do that again in this new one? But I think it's gonna-

But I think it's gonna- Crowan, you wanna fly home. I think it's gonna be all over that movie. Because it's the one thing everyone likes from the first one, and they put it in the trailer. Is Tim Burton directing this one or no? No, I think it said from the mind of Tim Burton. Oh, that's like-

That's even worse. So it's like, yeah, he's like the producer or something. Put it back. Put it back in your brain. Yeah, please. No one asked for this. No, no, no, no. Especially, like, Michael Keaton, I don't think, wanted to do it. Oh, I am getting that sense a lot, just on the

trailer, where he's like, it feels like he's kind of phoning it in. That's what he wants you to think. I also think that it was so long ago. The juice is loose. Yeah, it's not like, oh, Jeremy Farts. It's not like he remembers how to be Beetlejuice. It was a thing he did.

It's a thing he did for 60 days. I don't know. He remembered how to be Batman. If you look at it. We all saw that smash hit. If you go back and watch that movie, Alec Baldwin's a different person. Oh, I didn't.

That's how old that movie is. I didn't know that was Alec Baldwin until I was like well into my 20s. I had no idea. Right, because Alec Baldwin ate that Alec Baldwin. Yes, absolutely. And then aged 80 years. And then shot someone. Yeah, he did.

On purpose. According to the judge. According to those prosecutors that set him up. And the judge said, throw this out. What are you doing? That was insane. That was awesome. It's very rare to see a like dramatic courtroom situation

that you would see in like, I don't know, like law and order or even a few good men or something happen in real life. And that was it. And it happened. That was a movie moment. Yeah, in real life. The guy, the lawyer defending Alec Baldwin, he was waiting for this moment

Yes, he was he was playing it up. He goes well In that case what happened at this evidence? Yeah boom slam slam Alec Baldwin is a good guy He's a nice man He held he held for the musical sting and Aaron Sorkin's just like I love this. I love this great walk and talk I wish we had a gavel here. He'd be like I love 30 Rock We should I think learn about the Denny's afterlife menu See sure getting all blown around this time. It's great. You learned your lesson. He actually doesn't need to be on. Well, because

when it was upwards, it's not a problem. Say it three times, slam. The breakfast dish, so nice, you'll say it thrice. You have to. They really wrote that. Oh yeah, and Eric did say all these things. Yep. Oh, Eric did have to order. I was not thrilled. I said I want one of each of these. And then I had to order them all individually. You got to, dude. He loved it. Yeah. What does it come with? It comes with three silver dollar chocolate chip

pancakes topped with vanilla cream. That's what that was. Chocolate sauce, chocolate chips, and green sprinkles served with three eggs, asterisk, cooked your way in three strips of crispy bacon What was it like eating the mortar motor oil pancakes? The babbling flavored pain they weren't was so sweet, but like you said it was It was so runny and wet, but also thick yeah And it it was like bitter almost like the chocolate was such bad the chocolate sauce was so bad

It was like it was like sub Hershey's I was used to just like oh it's gonna be too sweet and it was but before the sweetness was ah yeah Like it like reminded me of like licorice or something it was it was very strange or like coffee like I was just like ah It was like when you see it was kind of like yeah Syrup that you think is just chocolate or something else. Yeah, God. I hated it. It was horrible until we said You know vanilla cream would you have placed vanilla? I thought it was melted whipped cream. Absolutely Absolutely know what it was so runny and then so thick and sludgy. It was so fucking bizarre pancakes I'm not even gonna wait to look they were the worst part of this gonna be mad You know, it looked like crow blood it did. Oh, it was so fucking bizarre pancakes. I'm not even gonna wait to do they were the worst part of this

He's gonna be mad. You know it looked like crow blood it did. Oh, it's true. Oh, I was on his face Yeah, oh no no he rubs on his face tattooing okay, but this is right before that Does have black crow blood yeah, it makes no sense They're like from now on you will bleed black blood and then he doesn't know that nope And that's the power of the crow and the power of black sludge. I hate the crow no afterlife belt We're gonna do a squawk along The eternal favorite is back the triple cheese threat is made

This triple cheese threat is made with fried mozzarella sticks melted American and provolone cheeses grilled between two slices of artisan bread served with tomato sauce for dipping and Wavy cut guess what we didn't get. What are you mad about? We didn't get tomatoes But I don't think I don't think it really needed it I'll be honest. I don't think it needed it, but I was surprised there was no sauce because it's mozzarella sticks I would have assumed there'd been like a marinara. Yeah, well tomato sauce for dinner. Tomato soup would have been cool. Yeah, I think that's probably what this was.

Well, we didn't get it. More than ketchup, but also, Nick saw that picture when we got there. First thing he said. Oh, this is like, oh, it's awful looking. Like this is like the worst looking one. And I went immediately, I showed you, and I went, he said this is the worst looking one.

This is the one he wants. I saw it, I went, this is interesting. Uh-huh, and he went, ah! Yeah. And then went bananas on it. I'm not a foot guy. I'm not a foot guy. I'm not a foot guy.

He's not. People like arches, people like arches. Dude, that, this fucking marinara mozzarella thing is so fucking good. What are you calling it? It's so. No, these are mozzarella sticks. Get it right. These are so good. I love this sandwich.

It is so bad for you. It's such a good sandwich. I grabbed it immediately because even good mozzarella sticks suck. You got about 30 seconds. Yeah, once that cheese starts to harden. And they cut it in half too. So it kind of looks like Beetlejuice teeth. Oh yeah. So good. That's fun. Yep.

Yep. Yeah Sure we farts now this is Jeremy this is build juice It's like it's a Germany farts plus Elvis yeah I've got one voice It's just a register up here register down here, and that's it pretty good What's next? This is cam, okay? The beetle juicy burger this was the best one for Eric to say yeah invoke Freakly freakishly good flavor. It's hard to talk with these stupid braces things

invoke freakishly good flavor with three quarter pound patties three strips of crispy bacon three slices of provolone cheese topped with signature diner Q sauce Pickles onions tomatoes and lettuce all stacked high on a golden brioche bun served with wavy cut fries too big Way too big. It's like this tall. It is, it's definitely that tall. It's stupid tall. So juicy. So like unedible.

Yes. Yeah. That was like, Harry smushed it. I had to squish it so I could cut off part of it and like divvied up and everything. And I squished it and it was beetle juicing every day. It was so beetle juicy.

Oh, it was beetle juicy, dude. The burger looked like the waiter at Denny's. He's juicing. He's squirting everywhere. He has a smile on his face. It's going everywhere. I watched you do it and I'm not like opposed to grease. Hamburger.

It's coming around. This side's getting it. burger Coming around this idea. All right some people are like they see grease and like ah But there's a certain level of grease. You know it's good. Yeah, I feel the same way Oh greasy that is like especially if it's not like gushing. You gotta have it. This was what the fuck yeah, what? It's called the beetle juicy burger, and it was too juicy It's like they injected more into it just for the name Yeah, it because there was really nothing else about it that made it was the most hamburger ass. Yeah, it was giant and juicy Yep, and it was a cheeseburger. Yep. There's nothing to it hamburger Jones over there. Yeah, I just that's his name by the way Yeah, I don't know what I don't know what like Diner Q sauce is, but I assume it's

Thousand Island. I guess. I didn't taste it at all. I did not taste it either. I didn't taste it. I tasted the burger, the cheese, and the lettuce. Yeah. And maybe onion. Yeah. Is what I tasted. Just not, just not for it. But I don't know. but that's not the only thing there's one more thing Cookies and scream shake anybody Shake but not from fear with this treat made with premium vanilla ice cream Oreo cookie pieces topped with whipped cream more Oreo cookie pieces and green sprinkles Don't let the description fool you.'s a scenario milkshake And they put green sprinkles on it about a quarter handful of green sprinkles on it. They put five Hey shake but not with fear

It's like employee introduction shake but not with fear you're gonna get your digs introduction. Shake, but not with fear. You're gonna get your digs on. These jokes, these jokes are your dad's, your dad at the diner making jokes. Yeah, absolutely. Michael was doing. Welcome to Denny's. When the waitress came and was like, can I clear some plates, take some stuff out of your way? And we were like, oh yeah, we're pretty much done. You can take everything and Michael goes take him He was just he was on fire with it. It was so good. I can bring you guys some boxes funny No, I don't think so. Yeah, I think we're good Take all this shit away. Sorry. I was too locked in on the fun zone. Yeah, it's true. They built Oh, baby, we're fun. So don't forget about when we first got there and blocked the fun zone. We didn't even think about that. I got some good pictures of Michael going to the fun zone and then Nick just... No, I did not! I absolutely did not say, come on, or we. You made that up. Let's go!

We're sitting there. We're sitting there. Michael, are you telling me you didn't say the words, Nick, come with me? Nick's the person not sitting next to me. Let's go So I'm looking at it's just a crane game. It's 10 feet from us. Maybe 15 feet Yeah, 15 feet. Uh-huh, and I'm looking at it and they got they got some big IPs in there Tomic they got Tomas yeah, the Tampkin Yeah Yeah The fun zone is Three walls mm-hmm with the machine in it yep just off to the side

It's it's and then something on the top that says fun zone It's like imagine the fun just for the magic the machine the crane machine came in a box I'm the size of the box it came. Yes, so it's the exact same dimensions, but like two inches wider Yeah, so it only encases the one machine. That's like a lot of work imagine Imagine that you were playing the sims and you had a phone booth in a home And you needed to build a space for this phone booth to go so you just build a wall where you can put its back to it and then two walls on either side of this little phone booth yeah that is the

fun zone so so I said I'm like I'm gonna check this out uh-huh I stand up I walk over there seconds uh-huh seconds and I'm just kind of looking at it And I and I turn to not yell, but hey yeah, yeah, I was gonna be like oh, they got some good And I go oh, and Nick's He's right Jesus You're getting up to film it because I thought you're gonna play the fun so I know no no no no no no not now Not now we haven't even ordered the food. Yeah, just sad. Yeah Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no We haven't even ordered the food yet. Just sad. Yeah Nick was gone. I don't know why Nick followed me over here He said let's go he said let's go

But if you want to see the fun zone if you want to see the full fun zone video, it's gonna be on patreon, baby Yeah, yep. Oh my god, dude crack at it on. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah Oh after we saw the success of the one other waitress who got there several times Uh-huh. Yeah, like I thought she was doing it a lot in her downtime, right? She was playing on a down time at Denny's like oh, she's done and then minutes later. I was like and she's back Yep, she was very animated at it too. Oh, yeah, it would be close. She'd be like, ah, oh, yeah Jordan you know when you're like she almost got it She's really into it

and you lean over and you're like, hmm, she almost got it. So yeah, I was like, she's really into it. Oh, that's fucking great. Oh man, we gotta watch out the Fun Zone video. But Jordan, we got this press release. Bringing back the $2, $4, $6, $8 value menu with innovative new dishes and launching the new afterlife menu

allows us to offer our guests great food at unbeatable prices as they immerse themselves in the scary delicious world of Beetlejuice Beetlejuice It's so dumb said Patty Trevino, Denny's chief brand officer She never spoke these words out loud Whether you're a Beetlejuice super fan That's us, classically Or Crow Or simply a Crow

fan looking for delicious affordable options because you're a Crow fan and you have no money. I like work at the mall. I like what they eat in the Crow though. Yeah. Oh yeah. We're not getting down. We're not going down there.

We're confident there's something on the menus for everyone to fill their cravings without emptying their wallets all in all our whole meal With tax and tip and everything was a hundred dollars even Wow And we got and we got the we had a lot of food We got the four things here, and then you guys each got meals and me and Nick got like coffee Yeah, it was about 80 something dollars or whatever before tip and I tip pretty you know I'd wanted to pretty good and a good yeah I try I tried to tip around I tried to tip around eight or ten percent and then hand her a folded up hundred dollar bill but it's a trick it just talks about God in it but it's a

good a real job yeah what an idiot come to church from Eric the most pious man. Dumb bitch. That's what she gets for taking that peach doll. Every time we go to Denny's and we don't get a male waitress, Eric goes, great, who am I going to tip? I'm going to have to pay. Here's money. He hands her cash and goes, this is for the men in the back. Compliments to the chef. I got a big compliment. I got another tip. Yeah Here's what's funny about this and it reflects it here in on the menu So on the back of the Beetlejuice Beetlejuice menu, uh-huh. It has the two four six eight dollar value menu

There's also ten unmentioned. Yep. Yep. There's a $10 one. There's 10 at the bottom. They're like, don't put that. That's too much. Also, that's what I got. I got the $10 chicken tendies. There's stuff from the Beetlejuice menu on the value menu as well. Which, I don't know. Delicious. Maybe you're value first, not Beetlejuice first. Sure. And so you wouldn't see it. Yeah, and then you're like, oh. It depends on if you're a Beetlejuice super fan

or simply looking for delicious affordable options, Crow style. You could be both though. Oh, that's true. I'm an Alec Baldwin super fan. Oh. And I said, I think you did it on purpose. Look, we have our own review of Denny's. And it's very important that we get to it.

But we do a segment here where we want to hear from you. The last one is so good I'm letting you know the last one is so good. Don't don't don't don't don't don't it's so good because we're getting into a segment where we hear from you and you review. Well all that's happening right now is like we're we got to decide internally. Well one of us, someone should do the first two and someone should do the last two. Jordan I think personally you should read the last one. Okay. Alright. Like Jeremy Hart's?

No. I'll get into it then. I thought you were about to take out reading glasses. And like you were reaching. I was. Oh, that's cool. I put my vape in my pocket. Oh, okay.

You want me to use it more? Nah, I think you're good. I'm already dying enough, dude. No, no, no. The comments, they're like, wow wow I didn't know Michael vapes sad It's like it's like who what what the fuck you can people are gonna be finding out for the first time also three years Sad did you just yeah, which we eat everything guess was just kill me faster. I'm trying to get to the afterlife quickly You know it's not healthy. Yeah, anyway do they think about the mozzarella cheese sticks in the sandwich?

That Beetle Juicy Burger looks good! Guys, I went on, I haven't slept for two days, and I went on a bender. I drank my body in alcohol, and then I came here. Michael's so funny. And I ate fucking 16 Big Macs from McDonald's, and I was like, yeah, it's not good for you though. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Honestly, you shouldn't be doing that vape Let's hear from Kingo Kingo says

Super rude like it's a person. Uh-huh Service by management. I cracked a innocent joke and the manager told me he didn't have time for me cracking a joke This is what happened. I doubt it. He asked me what I would like to drink I said whiskey I laughed trying to make him laugh because I was in the goofy mood the manager of lies saying he didn't have time for me cracking a small innocent joke Wow I was close to walking out but was too hungry to do so. Are you in the goofy mood right now, dude? The goofy mood. Earlier today, we were recording some video game stuff, and Nick in between our recordings is just like, does Denny's have cocktails?

And I I had already had with I had already had this. And I went, he's either asking or he's in the goofy mood I've been waiting. I've been I've been waiting since he asked to bring it up to see if he was in the goofy mood But we also sat down To do this episode and he is already looking at the menu for the place. We're going tomorrow He was like Dave cocktails. They have got yeah,. And, and, you know what's funny too, because I was maybe bendering a little bit over here, I've been buying, this is like when I go to somebody's place,

you just bring something. I've been buying, I'm just sick of goddamn seltzer. It's the go-to. I get it. Oh yeah. Yeah, I'm sick of it. I've been heavily investing in twisted teas. Oh yeah, hell yeah. Okay, okay. I have a case of half and half twisted tea that I almost brought with me today to put in the refrigerator Oh my god! Whoa! And I feel like Nick would have been cracking them down. Nick would have been cracking them down.

Dude, dude, I have them at home. I got up in the middle of the night and I was like, oh fuck, I'm not gonna go back to sleep So I was taking like a sleeping pill to go back to sleep and I'm like, you know what'll kick-drive this? Oh my god! Literally went, shh drink. Yeah, and I sleep with it in my mouth. Yeah, I drank the entire thing in one gulp Oh my god, and I was like it goes down so smooth cuz it's not carbonated. Try water I literally went and I went holy shit Like I could drink ten of these in a row and be blacked out on twisted tea Like I've never tried to chug one before. Twisted tea can, I just drink it. It's only 5%. I just drink it casually, like sipping it.

You don't have to stop. It is, it is so good. It must be because it goes when you crack it and nothing else. I'm gonna bring it tomorrow and watch this guy go brisk. Brisk teas are like that too, where it's just like they just go straight down your gullet great for shotgunning I found that out last night. Yeah, great for going to bed Is that night night? I was like time to get twisted. Yep, sleep. That's what happens when you're in the goofy mood Yeah, okay. He was twisted. I'll break. I'll bring some for Nick All right. Here we go Heather s What I hate about this location, okay. They never answer the damn phone!

D-A-M. I wanted to call to do- I wanted to do a call in order on four separate occasions with them, but they never answered the phone on any of them times for me to do so. I'd order online, but you can't do the coupons through the online order. You gotta do the coupons. It pisses me off now BC It happened more than once the first two times I gave him a pass, but today. I said screw them

I'll never go there not even a dine-in The coupons on online order. I don't know Denny's head coupon fucking We fucking need them. Where are you getting coupons? Check the 2, 4, 6, 8 hidden $10 menu. Well, I want them to be 1, 3, 5, 7 for me. Also, are we sure you can't use coupons online? Because usually you can. No, no, she has no idea.

Usually you can. Yeah, I don't trust her. She doesn't know how to use a computer. I'm just saying. She's trying to call a Denny's. That's it though. I also love the last guy. The first two times you gave him a pass.

Which is funny because she said she tried to do it four separate times. Which means the first two times you gave him the pass. Well, the third time... The sixth time... The third time you were still mad, but you still did it a fourth time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

She was bad the whole time. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me two through five, shame on me? I also loved the guy in the first one. Yeah. Where he's like, I'm so offended and I want to make a principled stand. Yeah. I'm just so hungry.

I was just being... I was doing a little... You was in the goofy mood. I was in the goofy mood making a stand. Yeah. I'm just so hungry. I was just being, I was doing a little goofy mood. I was in the goofy mood making a little innocent joke and I'm fucking starving and I'm not leaving. OK. I'm hungry for Denny's. Now, our final you review, which I left the entire thing in because I went, it has to all be here.

It sucks that much. How do you think you say this name? Niza? Yeah. Niza? Probably Niza. Niza C. The night started out as all nights do, light drinking of water and heavy smoking. Midnight rolled around and our collective stomachs grumbled. We dained to refuel at the nearest Denny's and found ourselves waiting in the lobby staring at the claw machine. Dazed with hunger for ten minutes, finally one server flagged us that he would seat us shortly. He never even welcomed us. We waited a few more minutes before we finally had seats and a few more for menus and water. After much deliberation through their need to stay relevant

in current culinary arts trends, we reluctantly chose our dishes and waited for the waiter. What a horribly constructed sentence. All of it, all of this is bad. I cannot help but critique it. It's awful, yes. 20 minutes and our cups empty, We were still waiting for our orders. Frustrated and hungry, we absconded with our dignity. A small drive to insert San Antonio, Texas based Greasy Spoon.

We marveled in hungry wonder at the pies on display. We must have looked desperate because we were immediately welcomed and seated at a booth. She's reviewing another restaurant. The butter was golden. The steak and pork chops were thick and juicy. Our cups runneth over. The biscuits were soft and fragrant. Waiters were getting tipped left and right.

The server, everybody was looking at the claw machine. The server was on point and friendly. He had us in stitches and we had to be wheeled out because we were so completely full. They even slid us a slice of pie as an apology for late coming toast. Denny's has no soul, no jazz, no rock and slash or roll. No service. What the fuck?

I fucking told you. This is, remember the guy who was like writing a standup comedy for this thing? She's writing her a great American novel. Yes, this is like college shit. This sucks ass. If this is you, fuck you. I have notes.

Yeah, hell yeah, Nick hates it. It's nice to start with a state of mind comma, pretense at the beginning of one sentence But when you do it for five in a row, uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. It starts being repetitive Yeah, everything about this was insane and up to the point where she's reviewing the other restaurant fucking awful Then that's you that's your review. Did you did that? Denny's has no soul. No jazz. I'm glad. Thank you I'm glad that they don't have any of that. Denny's has no soul. No jazz. I'm glad. Thank you.

I'm glad that they don't have any of that. No rock and or roll. We got orders. Some fucking Simpsons ass. Like it's not funny. You're not good at writing. None of this is clever. This is like I'm 22 and I'm writing on my space.

The night started out as all nights do. Like drinking of water and heavy smoking. Shut up forever. Ugh. Yeah, this is like my creative outlet. Yeah. My Yelp one-star review. God damn.

I showed it to my friends and they loved it. Yeah, exactly. They all thought, dude, they all thought it was so funny. They told me they read the whole thing. Yeah. Yeah, I'm sure. I said, what was your favorite part? And they said, oh, I couldn't possibly

I think I think the part where you said like oh all night start with water and heavy drinking that was probably my favorite Yeah, as far as they got they read that also and rolled their fucking eyes But now now it's time for us to review Denny's Beetlejuice Beetlejuice afterlife menu Jordan, what do you think of what we had? Some highs and lows for sure. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Why is my paper blowing now? There's no fan on in here. Oh Very interesting. Jordan's getting blown. Does he work at Denny's? I'm giving him a tip. That's what that is. So definitely some highs and lows, some hits and misses.

Server was nice. Oh, yeah, everyone who was there was great. Yeah, this was good. The Denny's was surprisingly nice. Yeah, for the parking lot? Uh-huh. Thought it was gonna be bad. For the barbed wire neighborhood across the street? Oh my god. We went from I might be stabbed to how nice, I might be served. I might get tipped. I might give one. Sir, do you work here? I do now. The afterlife melt was hands down the best one. I agree. I

Liked it and I also liked the amount I had which was about a quarter of it I think if I eat in half it would be too much imagine eating that as your whole meal And it was a big thing if you're eating the whole thing by yourself, so I recommend splitting it with three friends. Yeah Save your sanity The burger such a fucking mess comes comes apart, impossible to like cut, impossible to eat. Yeah. No flavor whatsoever. The most cheeseburger cheeseburger. Mm-hmm. And if I say it a third time, I'll summon one.

Hamburger. Hamburger. The slam, that's just the fucking pancakes. The pancakes, yeah. Those were bad. I'm starting to realize that maybe there were more misses than hits. But what about the last thing? The shake was really good.

Jordan went fucking crazy on that shake. He ended up eating so much of it that he went, I don't like how much I'm eating of this thing. You had some of those right there. I had some, yeah. You had a little scrape. I ate the entire like extra I think Eric was the first one that popped a straw in it. Oh, definitely you were like, well, it was so thin

It was very thin because I tried it was it was almost like whipped cream It was it was super super thin and then when you said that I was like well now I need to try it with the whipped Cream because there was no whipped cream in the in the spillover one. So Yeah, I really like that but Makes you wonder was the after melt afterlife melt and the shake good enough to balance out uh-huh just how bad the pancakes I don't know and honestly my answers probably no uh-huh I'm gonna give this one a 52% Wow okay in unison we were both surprised same brain um the pancakes were gross they were gross Nick ate all of them the mozzarella stick grilled cheese was fucking good yeah that thing

was really good Nick ate all that if we just ate that that been pretty good Nick ate the burger too the burger also just ate that, that would have been pretty good. Nick ate the burger too. The burger also was fine. The burger was good. It wasn't bad. It was like nothing. It was too big. It was fucking enormous. It just wasn't doing anything. It would be fine if it wasn't a big tall mess.

I don't know why it was a big tall mess. Adding that into the equation just made it worse. It was just a big tall mess, but it was a decent diner burger. Mm-hmm Shake was pretty good. Yeah, it was fine. You know, dude, that's high praise for Michael. It's true. It's true The shake was pretty good. I couldn't eat that whole thing. It's pretty good. I'm sitting here wondering in my head though I'm just like I thought it's pretty good. I liked it. Like I liked it But I get it and then I realized oh that was those are my chicken tenders Yes, oh yeah, that was on the other food. That was the best thing I think that was the best thing I ate. I had one too, it was really good.

You had, what did you have like a chicken sandwich? It was like a chicken club. But you were like it's dry. It was so dry. The chicken tenders were not dry, which you think would be drier than that. Yeah, but they weren't. And that was actually quite good. Removing that, oh yeah, that's kind of sucked. Yeah. There you go. The fiddle juice menu kind of sucked. I'm gonna have to hit it with a 45 45 That's an average. That's fair. I'll take the higher one on that cuz I like the shake 48.5

48.5 the shake was good. I love it as much as you did, but it was good the pancakes were repulsive They were disgusting and over under rotten tomato score 48.5 for Beetlejuice's sequel. Oh, that's such a good... Oh. Boy, 48.5 is like right where you feel like it's probably gonna land. Yeah. Audience or around tomato review? With the critics. Oh. Under, under. I feel like it's gonna be over 48.5.

I think it'll be just over. I think it'll be like 52 or 55. I think it's gonna be like right there. Wow. We'll see. That over under. Let us know in the comments what you think. I'm just saying this could be a good barometer for the movie. Also let us know if you think I should stop vaping. Michael will read all the comments and take them into account. We'll do a poll and whatever the bull decides I might have to ignore.

I was gonna do an Elon Musk style. I like it. Oh, yeah. 48.5 is the final score. That's kind of, there's things here that you can take away from them pretty good. This is heroin. Whoa. Yeah, that's pretty good.

Technology's crazy. Yeah, real arty Langtide. I don't even need a spoon anymore. Fuck no. Hey, you can go to store.eat.com for merch, or go to 100%eat.myshopify.com. It's our Shopify and you can check it out. We have some new, we're working on some new merch

right now coming out soon with international shipping. When? We need to put in a date. You've been saying that. I know. How about today? But now we have actual designs. How about tomorrow?

No. Next week. No. When? Two weeks. Oh, I thought Jordan was looking at a date. Oh no, I'm looking at our faint shout outs. He's checking, he's checking that Denny's video.

That's pretty cool. Guys, have you seen this video? We'll let you know soon. You can find out at 100% eat on Twitter and on Instagram where you can stay up to date with everything and you can watch this week's Michael Jordan podcast, patreon.com slash 100% eat. That's also where you can see every other Michael Jordan podcast. They're all very good.

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You can still see it. 3241 Austin, Texas 78714. Go for it. Oh, shit. I'm like, what? That's one awesome tip. It's like it was written. Yeah! Try to stop that, Texas! Jordan, anything to add?

Yeah, yeah, I got a 100% fan shout out. Whoa, we have a 100% fan shout out? Yeah. Wait, so if you go to Patreon.com slash 100% Eat and you become a 100% fan, you can get your own personalized 100% fan shout out? Yeah, you can give us a tip. Yeah. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha friend something. Brianna Bella... oh god... Guajardo? I hope I'm saying that right. I love you to the moon and back bestie. That's surprisingly sweet. That's really nice. It

wasn't a hammering. I thought it was really gonna be directed at Eric. Do you think they're best friends and now there's something more with benefits don't ruin it I thought it was gonna become like a shadow raid legends thing, but no no it's thing like that. That's so nice That's really nice I just want to say to at the end of this video that I saw the website I saw it on There's a text that just says that's it you're gonna tease him. Yeah Right subscribe, patreon.com slash 100% rate subscribe telephone about the show where we eat the food and write the food and collect tips

Goodbye. Oh You hit the clock that was really that was really close