100% Eat - Who is the Naughty Boy of the Week? %% Taco Cabana Street Food Fest

Episode Date: July 30, 2024

Our Heroes don't know how long they've been recording but they do know they spent a long time at Taco Cabana trying to get the Street Food Fest offerings. Wait isn't it hot cheetos? Sort of. Wait isn't this supposed to be a Mt Dew rum punch? Yeah it is. Wait does Taco Cabana suck? You gotta listen to find out because we're also really getting in the weeds of Donkey Kong. Snag a lil shirt at http://100percenteat.myshopify.com which is NOT your shopify. It's ours. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to 100% eat the show where we try every fast food restaurant to let you know if you needed you Probably do I'm your host Michael Jones alongside my co-host Jordan swears Jordan. How are you great? Hell yeah the whole no you're supposed to be allowed Nick is like I'm wearing my headphones and I went ah and And then that he also didn't have me check my mic. I checked it. Oh. You were busy.

You were doing work for Mikey Fredo. Even though we sound exactly the same. Close your eyes. Now who's talking? Was that me? Now who's talking? I closed my eyes and it confused me. Hang on.

Who took my voice out of my head? Wait, now who's talking? Is that what I sound like? Hey. I'm annoyed. No, you don't. I could't try I'm surprised more people don't think me Nick's songs yeah I don't get the craziest ones are people who are like making like crazy reaches more doing like regulation podcast and

everything and they're like is it just me or does Andrew Panton sound like Bernie you're you're dumb. Well, you're not because they're probably not watching this. That's true. Well, that's fine. We can just so I can get them all day. Let them know. Yeah. Hell yeah. They're dumb.

Yeah. You go let them know. That's crazy. That's insane. What a fuck. Who do you sound like? Jordan. Oh, yeah. That's when I close my eyes and I hear that I go, that's Jordan. I don't really like the sound of my voice, I'll be honest.

Yeah? Somebody at the... I think it's a nice voice, Jordan. Thank you, thank you. I'm not fishing for compliments. It will do nothing for me, trust me. Don't feed the bird. Compliments.

Oh! Should put that under the sign. Somebody at the voodoooo Ranger meetup we did told me that I had a very good voice for like podcasting and radio. And I was like, oh. That's what you're doing. I was like, thank you so much.

I don't agree with you, but thank you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's a nice compliment that I won't take. Yeah. I don't take most compliments. No, no, I get it. We're back at Hungry Dog. Why did you raise your hand?

To show everyone Hungry Dog. Because this is where we are. They could have seen it before your hand. Their eyes were still closed. Did you reveal it? Was there a curtain? Well, their eyes were still closed and this is how I opened the lid.

There was a George Lucas style, like star wipe. Announcement! We got our office. Yes, we do have our office. Right, I mean, this is us talking about it for the first time in front of the paywall. Yes, correct. We have a building.

But if you cough up the money for the Michael Jordan podcast. You already knew. You'll, wait, is that behind us? That's in front of us. It's in front of us. Right, so you didn't already know. No, no, no, we already, we talked about about no, but I'm saying you're gonna see it

I thought you were talking about no no no no no no no we talked about yeah I'm just saying you're gonna see it. This is why I said no time travel on this show production meeting you will see it Before next week's episode yes on the Michael on the Michael Jordan podcast Because we're going there right after this. Yes, we are. Especially because we'll be out of time. And I think we're going to do we're going to have a tour. Yes. And it's going to be a fast tour. That's what you think. I don't think so.

You've never seen a man roll around on the ground in an empty building before. Not like this. Yeah, I mean, you've definitely seen me roll around on the ground before, but not in this building. No this building no no no it's only 600 square feet you should get around it pretty quick rolling around You can do one roll like yeah, yeah, one revolution, but you're assuming. There's only gonna be one type of roll oh Many rolls can this guy bust out. I'm about to I'm excited to find out and That's why one the end I can't really roll. Oh,

back flip. I call that a link. I'll try it again. I haven't tried in a couple of months. Oh yeah. It's probably I'm probably just as good. Yeah, we should get Tyler hazard over here. We should do it. Break your neck. Make sure we do it on concrete. Yeah. Over Gracie. Yep. Oh yeah. Concrete. Oh yeah. That was the thing we were going to do is have Gracie make it so she quit. Yeah.

Yeah. She said, I'm not going to I'm not responsible for that. Smart. Smart. Yeah, that's why she quit. Yeah. I mean, nobody quit. No, you can't you don't you can't quit us, baby.

Well, nobody got laid off. No, she never worked here. That's true. Yeah. Still in slack, though. Yeah, she's got to be. Yeah. I will say before we get into the slop food moment of silence. Cinnamon has passed. That's it's not news. It's not a joke. It is a real thing. We got the news

yesterday. Unfortunately, the cinnamon has passed. It feels like you're fighting back a laugh and I don't know why. I feel so bad. That's what he sounds like when he's about to cry. He's not laughing, he's crying. I feel sad. Nobody's laughing. He kept making jokes about it once we heard, which I thought was in very bad taste. Now you have a smirk on your face.

No, I'm trying not to laugh. Well, he laughs when he's uncomfortable. Oh, it's true. I laugh when I'm sad. Yeah, she let us know. I'm just so sad. She let us know. But even in her message to us with the sad news,

there was the crazy emoji. Yes. Yeah, she she let it fly still. Well, one last one for cinnamon. I don't think she's going to stop doing it. Well, that one is for. Yeah, this is I think I think that's going to be the beginning of them for cinnamon. Those are going to continue. Yeah, all all future. First of all, the dog was like 700 years old. Yeah. Yeah. But she almost made it to October.

I almost made it to October. Like three more months. But, you know, not many people can say when their dog passes, though, this dog will be heralded. Yeah. Oh, the dog changed lives as like a lefty. Yeah, definitely changed my life. Like before Cinnamon, I didn't know a dog could do the thing Cinnamon cinnamon is now yes for cinnamon is now ad after death of cinnamon

There's the jokes I was talking about man Cinnamon is resting peacefully in the nicest pluffle in heaven. It's true. The clouds, the clouds were all pluffle. Yeah. And she can easily get in and out of them. She doesn't have to scream. She has probably little dog wings. Yeah. Oh, and she's staying out of water for some reason.

She needed water. No, no, no, no. But she, Gracie went out and said goodbye to Cinnamon and then let us know what was going on and everything and it's very sad. So rest in peace, Cinnamon. You were a true member of this show. That's true. By a better mascot than the monkey, by all means.

By all means. If only we had found Cinnamon sooner. Wow, all right, well he's jealous. That's pretty cool. Interesting. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Nick, you could try making your dog famous.

Which one? The dog with human eyes? I mean, you got the dog that made a wish and it backfired. Dogs fucked up. The Timmy Turner wishing he was a dog and he can't speak anymore. So he can't wish to be turned back.

Yeah, but it's it's sad. Yep. These things happen. Mm hmm. Yeah, but it's sad. Yep. These things happen. Mm-hmm. Everything dies. It's true. Except me. Oh.

I haven't died yet. I'm not sure it'll happen. I'm with you. You can't know for sure until it does. That's true. Yeah. Someone's got to live forever. Just by the numbers, like somebody's going to.

Not literally 100% of people can die. Yeah. That's just by the numbers, like somebody's gonna... Not literally 100% of people can die. That's just by the number. It doesn't make any sense. Like that would be almost too convenient if it happened to everyone. And it hasn't happened to anyone yet in the million year history of the human race, but never seen ever.

But could it be this podcast host? It could be Michael. Do you remember 100 years ago when cinnamon passed? That's what we're going to be talking about in 100 years. Yeah. I love that idea of us living to be like 150. And we're still doing this. And just going like, remember 100 years ago?

Remember cinnamon from 100 years ago? Do you remember that dog from 100 years ago? And they will. Yeah. Yeah. They will. When you live to be 150, you'll remember cinnamon from 100 years ago. Do you remember that dog from a hundred years ago? And they will. Yeah. Yeah. When you live to be 150, you'll remember cinnamon from a hundred years ago. Think about it. I think it's great. On the topic of cinnamon, it reminds me, we just posted the

ride along with the car accident. Yes. Oh, yeah. From the vault. And there were a couple of comments, more than one. Somebody was like, I can't believe they showed this video when Gracie died. I can't believe she went through the windshield and got hit by a truck. I saw more than zero of this comments. Uh-huh. Um, people were locked in.

That's why we got the best fans, because it's like, that's the stuff. Those jokes. How good they show this. Perfect. It's fucking great. Hey Michael. What we eat today Taco cabana street food fest Interesting because that's not how it was pitched to us That is not what when I did the research for what this food is that is what I found out. That's what it is I Thought it was an exclusively Flamin hot cheetoeto menu. Me too. Of different... different... it's so... it's so hard.

Different Hot Cheeto flavored infused varieties. Yeah. Even when we were there and you were like, oh, yeah Yeah, and we were drinking these fries I was like wow when they put hot Cheetos in all of it and we were like We were riding Mountain Dewbirds. That's right. We were Mountain Zoo and all we were we were four unruly birds inside of the talk It's a very long ride along. I don't think you can call them unruly if they're mounts. They're really You know, right you've right. That's not like you off. That's that's the word're mounts. They're ruly. You're right. Right, it's not like they fuck you off. That's the word they use, so what does that mean? They're just unruly at first. Oh, I hadn't considered that.

I'm just saying. It's a ruly now. When you push the fucking E key or whatever and the thing shows up and you ride it, it's about as ruly as you can get. That thing is tamed. Yeah, that's incredibly rly, the mountain zoo bird. I think what they meant to say is it rules. Oh, that makes sense. Like cinnamon.

Yeah. Don't you forget about cinnamon. Maybe the only, because look, I'm not remembering that we did it. I just know there's no way we haven't done it. Probably the only real moment of silence we've ever had. I think so, probably.

Yeah. Like a legitimate one. I'm glad Eric didn't clap in the middle of it. No, my hands are full. On the- You can't hold a gun if you're clapping and you can't clap if your hands are full. Yeah, that's true. It's how you don't steal from me. On the sort of thread of Mountain Zoo, the the unruly bird who is ruly, I was

sent from CheapAssGamer, my friend Jared. Did he get his tokens? Did he get that code from the... Oh yeah, oh yeah. He showed me that he did and he was very excited. Okay, I thought Michael stole it. I think I think petition Cinnamon Mount. Oh, that would be cool. That'd be cool, but it is unruly and just sort of walks in circles. It goes in circles and you can't really do anything else. It's like a town only mount.

What? Dude, replace that with cinnamon. That's what I'm saying. So for now- It's wings instead of those big ears. He sent me this, cause he'll send me some stuff that's like food related every so often. We should do like a cinnamon shirt or something.

Oh, you think so? I think so. I think Gracie would like that. Yeah. And all a cinnamon shirt or something. Oh, you think so? I think so. I think Gracie would like that. Yeah. And all of the proceeds still go to us, but. Yeah. Well, yeah. But remember cinnamon.

What would it go to? Yeah. But think of her. Yeah, now you remember. Gong Cha X Final Fantasy XIV collaboration campaign. Warriors of light get ready to embark on a refreshing new adventure Oh boy, Gongcha is apparently like a tea like boba tea shop

You can get the porky king mount when they they have three different teas that you can get the porky king Uh-huh. It's P O R X I E. It's like a It's like a king. What does that say with anything? It's like a king pig. What does this have to do with anything? Final Fantasy XIV you thought Mountain Zoo was the only one. Guess what? You also get a pig. Right, but that was like an integration with the food we were doing.

Yeah right there baby. Because this might be next. You might be getting a preview. I bet it won't be. Yeah I doubt it. You don't want the pig? I want the Mountain Zoo. I wanted what we were supposed to get today.

We got what we got. We did get we got. Yeah, that's what I said I feel like we got what we deserve. Yeah, fuck is the timer dude? Uh, yeah, Nick. What the fuck dude? This is unbelievable Nick The fuck is the matter with you, dude Thank you. I was just gonna say that's not silverware What is that last three am I gonna go on the naughty boy of the week? or like three times already this board so Hang on hang on wait wait wait so I had this Okay, it's starting waiting for shit. I had this idea again somebody was late today, and I was like this shit needs to be addressed

We how do we hold each other? No one would be held accountable, but they can be hammered. Yes. This will not affect accountability in any way, shape, or form. That's how we hold each other accountable. You don't want to get hammered. I certainly don't. But continuing Eric going, we're not going to decorate the place.

Of course we are. Of course it's going to look great. We, when you guys are gone, Eric's like, we're not going to have a bunch of stuff. Yes we are. It's going to be covered wall to wall. We're not going to record episodes in there. Remember he said he's like, we don't even have anything. And then he went, well, we could use all the merch that we have and all this old stuff that I have and all this cool member builder that we have. And we go to raise house and take that giant magnet off his refrigerator and you got to take that. Oh, that's right. I saw him earlier. I should

have asked him about the magnet. No, I have it on him. Hang on. Why did you turn it on? What use is this? What do you mean? We Did he have it on him? Damn. Hang on. Why did you turn it on? What use is this? What do you mean? We're at 54 seconds. How long was that going? 56 seconds.

What do you mean about? It tells you. Right. But we didn't start for another minute. Right, because we were sitting here. All right. One minute, six seconds. So add 12 minutes.

So it's somewhere between a minute and 10 seconds and 12 minutes. Mm. At least the food was good. Become unruly. No one's going to ride me. We got I got to go to the top of the mountain, get the special flute. Look, we got you.

I'm not sure what the problem is. We got margaritas. Is that what that is? I'm going to be honest, though, it wasn't bad. Yeah, it certainly wasn't good, but it certainly wasn't bad. is we got margaritas. Is that what that is? I'm gonna be honest though. It wasn't bad Yeah, it certainly wasn't good, but it certainly wasn't bad. Yeah decent margarita. Well, you're still nursing it Yeah, I tried to suck down a little cold it had left What? Is that I don't

Whose is that? It's Eric's now Or that was his I see I see. I see. Well, that's a communal net. What the fuck? What the fuck? You, he took yours and now he's

upset. I was going slow. I finished my other one so fast. I'm like, this is great. So I can nurse this one the whole episode. What the fuck? He's driving, dude.

Come on over here, Nick. He really took it. I thought he was kidding. He showed it to her. I thought he was kidding. When the fuck has he ever been kidding? He does not. So he says funny things. Okay, but he is never kidding. But the humor comes from him not joking. We did get one thing today where he was like this thing used to be that thing, but we did provoke it a little bit. Jordan started saying something and I went, stop it. Talk. And he went, you know,

this was at the top of a mountain where I got that flute. Yeah. And I just I just noticed a little snowball. Yeah, yeah. And he rolled down avalanche, maybe the weight. And you'll hear this if you go if you go watch and listen to the ride along, which I which I think is about 45 minutes long. It's maybe, maybe, maybe. It's not the longest ride along. It's got to be top 5. It's up top 3. I don't think it's the longest. But it could be the

longest ride along without riding. Yes. It is the shortest drive. It's about 4 minutes of driving, getting there, then audio only in the taco cabana. Taco cabana. And then four minutes back. Yep. And we were probably in there. 25.

You think we're that long? Yeah, I think so. I think longer. Longer? I was guessing 30. I was guessing 20. There's no way it was 30. Maybe, I was having fun though.

Yeah, that's true. We were watching the smallest TV. It was huge though. Here's the thing. There's so much room. Sometimes we go I was having fun though. Yeah, that's true. We were watching the smallest There's so much room sometimes sometimes we go into place and it's so small like uh fuck I don't remember where it was the facilities or a pizza. However, was it pizza with the last time we went? It was so tiny. We couldn't talk shit. Oh, yeah This was the exact opposite it was like a fucking mansion Why was it so we were just going non nonstop on the other side of the building. It was crazy. Someone show Eric walked over and was whispering.

I wanted to make sure. That woman can't hear you, dude. Yeah, that's right. She was on the cordless phone. She was half a county away. Yeah, she was making a call at some point. There was some stuff going on. I had fun. We still don't know what was going on across the street. It looked like something was going on

where she was on the phone with someone, had nothing to do with the Taco Cabana. No, no. Clearly a... Maybe somebody couldn't find the Taco Cabana. Me too, I thought she was going across streets. Hey, there's something going on outside kind of call. Like she's alerting someone, could be a manager.

Yeah. Could be someone from the city. We don't know, but nothing was going on outside. Yeah. Fucking jack shit. It's still a mystery where I was looking going, what is it? We all know.

It's just like a rundown abandoned building. It's a rundown abandoned gas station next to a tattoo parlor. Well, it used to be next to the state inspection place. Yeah. We said that and I'm like, I'm gonna stop. Yep.

They totally removed it then. Yeah. It's just gone. So. Well, you don't need them anymore. We we're gonna stop. Yep. They totally removed it. Yeah. It's just gone. So you don't need them anymore. We walked into the taco cabana. There was a guy finishing his order, taking a very long time, an older woman in front of us. Yeah.

But then a guy between her and us. He held the door open. Yes. So when the guy got done with his order, the old woman walked up and started ordering. It took so long that the guy in front of us and the guy who came up after us, who stood behind us, both fucking left. Not at the same time. No, they just went. They just trade off like like in a contest where you have to leave your hand on the car car Yes, like they just couldn't go no longer. No, they went that's enough It was a test of endurance and they they bowed out. I wasn't that long I that's the thing. I felt like that's the thing. It was not near the time of like fuck this is taking forever I'm out of here. It was it was a while It was not nearly long enough to be like fuck this especially

Especially the guy behind us. Yes. Cause that's the guy going, oh sick, someone left. Right. The line just got shorter. But then he sees four people in front of him and he's like, I gotta wait for each of these guys. We're very clearly not in single file. We are in mass.

I mostly agree with what you're saying. He saw three people ahead of him and one person at the salsa bar the whole time That is what he said which Nick was furious about by the way He was really disappointed that it trunk there's only three different kinds of salsa well not The guy oh, yeah, which is not a salsa there was a whole debate on whether or not it can be to Gaio, according to him, which is not a salsa. There was a whole debate on whether or not it could be considered salsa.

So he didn't get any pico. No, so he got five things of it. I'm feeling that mark a little bit. Not bad, right? Suck it down. He got five things of dark red salsa and five things of light red salsa. Which I miscounted quickly.

Yeah. I thought he got four of each. And he went one for everyone. And I'm like, well, I'm not going to use it. He's going to pour one out. Most times, even the three of us don't use a whole thing. And he kept saying, one for each, one for each. Then when you got up to the register, we all decided,

okay, now we can get the fuck out of the way. So we don't think there's more people online and we can talk shit about you. So we walked off and then he put them all down and I realized, oh, he's got 10. There's five each. Yes. And he went, went well one for each

Plus if anyone wants extra Yeah, anyone If anyone there any of the four of us could be maybe one extra. Do you think it will be Michael? Do you think it will be Eric by the way post food? I had zero yeah, of course yeah I opened one of the red ones and used it for like one bite. That's about it. Okay. Talk about, so we're at zero, we're at,

just count one. Yeah, sure. Okay, that's seven left. Yeah. How many did you use? I think I had one. Okay, so six left. No, you know what?

I did open a second one and use half of it. So even if you count that. Exactly, so count that. So count that. Five. Five between the two of you? No, four between the two of you. Where are the other ones? Where's the rest of them?

So six left. Do you know where they are, Jordan? In the bag, ready to go. There were a couple left and I asked Nick, do you wanna take? He got 10? Yep. And you guys used, again, not even whole, even if you to claim it. Mm-hmm. Oh, no you said you used one

Yeah, and I used to to seven seven left He had four Three left for anyone else who wants it. There's three left. Who could anybody in the room? Also the salsa fucking sucks That salsa is shitty. 20 years ago. Oh god. That's all I hear about from this place from Nick Yeah, he's been, look, don't get me wrong. Ever since 9-eleven He goes, he goes, I don't know what it was. The nation changed. He goes up and down. Yeah He goes up and down sometimes. There's moments. He has been up since subway

Hmm since subway this guy has been letting fucks fly Seriously like he's like we walked in fuck this yeah Fucking bullshit are let me go get ten sauces He wants his fast food the way that he wants it and if it's not that way It's a problem, but I feel like Subway, it broke something. Oh yeah. Like, even when he went up, he'd come back down. He stayed up.

Yeah, yeah, definitely. Like, I'll give him the Dippers was a slight, even if you're not a Nick. Yeah. But he hasn't gotten over it. No, no. He's riding that rage. You gotta let it go, man.

I feel like the taco- It's only gonna eat you up inside and consume you. Okay, he wants more of the burger. He's making grabbies. I don't think we should. I feel like the time I'm gonna eat you up inside and consume you okay He wants more of the market. He's making crap We should that's I really don't think we should that's how that's how a raccoon takes something like it's gonna piss him off or calm Him down. I'm willing to take the risk. We're not to find the middle Like cotton candy Like a raccoon, I think he's soon gonna be afraid of one. Oh, rabiesnik, classic.

Oh, dude. Can't wait for his rabies era. I think we talked about it previously, but the fan art section in the Discord, the 100% E Discord, where it is horror. Cryptid drawings. Of like, all like all of like the grackle and the the donkey muscle.

It's really evolved. It started with just like creepy drawings, creepy monkey, yeah, sauce monkey. And then it was like, oh, the other guys are involved now. I was like, I hate this. Yeah, to me, it's a thing where people who really are into the movie Long Legs are going to be really stoked about what whatever's going on in the fan art subreddit because it's fucking weird looking

It's gross and made with pen and brown paper. I haven't seen it the movie. Mm-hmm has someone done monkey long legs. No Long limbs. What's the monkey with the long limbs? Well, they're talking about like an orangutan. I guess all right thing That's not long enough, though. No. That's because that exists. Yeah. Like Dumbass Kong? What's his name? Yeah, you know what?

I'm talking about Dumbass Kong. DK! Dumbass Kong! Dude, you know I got posted again yesterday? It took everything in me not to send it to you guys again. Was it the Joel Haver thing? No, it was the guy who's uh, who's in his car. You guys let me, let me know if you know this one.

D K. So you get it like fucking creed. Yeah. Yeah. He's singing. He's singing it like Viking style singing of the donkey Kong. 64 like that. Yeah. It rocked. Uh, what? Look it up right now and play it on the podcast? Oh my gosh. I mean, if you guys, if you. They're all saying no means do it. Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

Yes, do it. You got to leave this in, man. No, just do it. Yeah. Oh, man. He's probably got a hot link to it and everything. Any thoughts on Taco Cabana at all? I never go there.

Never really eat it. No? Same. I've never been there outside the show. The last time we went there, I totally forgot what it tastes like. So it was kind of like a new experience again. Don't recommend it, honestly.

What? But here it used to be better 20 years ago. That oh, 10 years ago now. OK, but OK. But the thing about Taco Cabana. They changed after Harambe died. Yeah, they put him down. They took their d They changed after Harambe died. Yeah. They put him down. They took their dicks out for Harambe and it was over, dude. And it's like,

you know, it's sad, but I get it. It's terrible food and I don't understand it. Yeah. I don't know who it's for. It's just at this point, I think an institution where people who first like it, liked it when they were young. did you not like it? I don't remember no No, you never liked it. No, I don't remember it was so long This how a Viking would sing it He's still going just like a Viking I'm leaving to kick some tail. His coke and I'm the first with his shootium. It's gonna hurt.

If he shoots you. Faster and stronger. Still going. He's the first member of the deep cave. I just like to point out. I don't remember this one. Keep going. Iconic song is not bigger, faster, no stronger. He's exactly the same as he always is. Yeah, I never this one. Iconic song. Uh-huh. It is not bigger, faster, no stronger.

He's exactly the same as he always is. Uh-huh. Yeah, I never understood that. He's just regular Kong. Which is more than enough. And that's fine. He has a coconut gun now. That's new.

Yep. As far as I remember. It fires in bursts. He seemed pretty on par with Donkey Kong. Yes. Why are there so many Donkey Kong titled games that don't have Donkey Kong? What do you mean? Donkey Kong Country, most of them?

Well, he gets captured and you gotta save him. Not in the first one, he's in it. Right, and then he's not in the other ones. I think he's in most of them. Donkey Kong Country 2? Yeah, and then Donkey Kong Country 3. Wait, is it? Yeah. Wait, hang on, wait, who's in two? It's Diddy and Dixie. Diddy and, okay. And then Donkey Kong Country three. Wait, is it? Yeah. Hang on. Wait, who's in two?

It's Diddy and Dixie. Did he end it? OK. And then three. The baby. That's the baby one. Can't know. Candy's like the girlfriend or something. Candy's doing workout. Yeah. Obics or something. Yeah. Yeah. And I'm funky Kong. I'm the fun uncle. You're like, you can't. What the fuck?

Yeah. Hey, yeah. Why? Why did you make that song about me? Everyone else is good! I don't even know if he's Linky Kong, he's too small. He's Suggie Kong. What the fuck? I'm not Suggie Kong! Go ahead and see some Suggie Kong fan art. Nooooo!

And if you haven't seen the video of Linky Kong reacting to the DK rap. That Joel Haver video is so video so it's so good. Have you seen him in? Smiling friends. I haven't gotten to that episode yet. I so I let all the episodes come out and I'm watching them I just saw Alan's adventure. I love Alan The the episode that Joel Haver is in of smiling friends. He is animated in the way that he is in his videos Nothing else. They've done so that's's cool they've done so much mixed media in the season it's really great it's really cool it's been it's been really really really did not like the live-action president though oh that was ugly and gross I did not like

that maybe very yeah yeah I saw a video and I'm pretty sure it was Joel Haver mm-hmm but it wasn't his channel but it was was a... It was a video game thing. Mostly like Last of Us. Have you seen that? With like the ladder? I could be wrong. It could be somebody else. It was very Joel Haveri. Like kind of just Josh in his style.

He climbs a ladder onto a roof and then like, unseen, he just knocks it over. And he's like, You're gonna have to find another way around! And he's like, I could just pick it back up. He's like, no, you're gonna have to find another way around. And he's like, I could just pick it back up. I was like, no, you're gonna have to find another way around. And then the guy's just like, well, I could just climb on top of this and pull myself.

No, you're gonna have to find another way around. And then he ends up pushing a crate down that's smaller than the thing the guy could have climbed. And he's like, use this. It was kind of like, why do video games do this? I'm pretty sure it was him, but it was on another channel. That's good. Or it was just some other white guy.

That's every one of you. We all look the same. He sounded like us. You said it, Michael. That's every mission in Thor Ragnarok, where it's like, oh, we're so close. And then Tree Falls, we have to go around. Yeah, of course.

And then that's the whole through the volcano Yeah Yeah, it's it's climb this tree or go through the volcano volcano it is I never played the second one. Yeah, love the fuck out of the first one. I Really like the second one came out. I was like I'm gonna play this I played for like two hours, and I was like yeah I really love what's- came out. I was like, I'm going to play this. I played for like two hours and I was like, yeah, I really love what's his face is Odin. I thought that was a great acting and a performance. It's the guy from Westway. Yeah. Like, like the nebbish guy. Yeah.

Like he's so good. Yeah. It's just like, Oh, that's not how I'd ever portray. Yeah. He plays him in such a unique way that it's like, he's not, he, he's, uh, he's conniving. Yeah. It's not really, uh, I like the first, I like the first one more. The second one is very he's conniving yeah it's not really uh I like the first I like the first one more the second one is very I mean obviously it's very good but I think the first one has so much that isn't like huge story beat into huge story beat into huge story beat like the other one feels like it has some room to kind of play and yeah well the other one feels like it has some room to kind of play. Yeah, well, the other one's kind of like, just do my own thing.

Yes. Yeah. Oh, shit, here we go again. And the second one's kind of like, oh, the end of the world is coming. Yes, and it's a lot of that like the whole way. So, hey, do you guys know anything about Taco Cabana? Yeah, they have tacos. I guess I could learn. Do you want to learn something?

We're only 17 minutes in. That's what you think, you fool. Or possibly 30. 30? Yeah. There's only one way to find out in the facts section. Now, Nick made a typo. Shut up. Our last Whataburger episode at Space Jam

was February 1, 2022, where we ate the Little Caesar's Batman crazy calzone. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It received an average rating of nothing, and it doesn't matter. Do you remember what happened when we went? Oh, right.

To where? We went to Taco... Do you want a burger? No. Or Taco Cabana? Where? We went to Taco Cabana. I was talking about this in the ride along and I was like,

I remember coming here. Uh-huh. I don't remember eating it. We went to Taco Cabana. So have we ever eaten Taco Cabana on the show? I don't know. We ate it... sometime. Yeah.

Because he said taco cabana. So we go to taco cabana, we wait in the longest drive-thru, we pull up... They had the highlighter sign. Uh-huh. You do remember. And then we had... do you have the barbacoa, whatever? I remember we tried to go inside first, huh? And the door was long. Oh, no, we tried to go inside a worker walked in It did not hold the door for us and then it locked and we went what? Then we went to the drive-thru and we don't have that so then we went to Little Caesars

Batman crazy calzone, huh? Fucking crazy. Oh shaped like a bat. Mm-hmm. It was It was pizza. It was it was pizza. I just mean I don't even remember the pizza the shape was shitty Yeah, never like the little bottoms and tops had like a cheese goo inside of like the roll. Oh, yeah It was like oozing out And that's taco cabana. What a good fact. Yeah can't believe we went to Whataburger and had little things. That was a busy day, dude. Yeah, crazy.

We were all over the place. Originally a San Antonio based company, Taco Cabana was sold to California based Jack in the Box franchisee. What? To the... You're good. California based Jack in the... Oh no, I said it right.

Yeah, you got it. Fuck! From the top. It's okay. Take two? Taco Cabana was sold to California-based Jack in the Box franchisee Yadav Enterprises Incorporated for 85 million dollars.

This is the only true instance of California-ing up Texas in a bad way because if Taco Cabana escapes containment in the Lone Star state, there's no telling how powerful the monkey will become. Also complaining about California messing up Texas is nuts because this is a bottom-tier state. Well, bottom-west.

Yeah. Bottom-middle. Bottom-middle state. Yeah, I think Texas is like the Midwest. If you'd asked me where it would be, it's Midwest. Yeah. It's not Southwest. It's South-middle. Yeah, Midwest. And it's South, but it's not the South. Yeah, exactly. So none of it makes sense. It's truly in this

like crossover of a diagram. Let's just call it what it is. Texas. It's Mexico. It's Mexico. Let's call it what it is. Tejas. Top tip, tip Mexico got stolen. That's right. Yes. Yeah, yeah. Mexico with a different, if Mexico can continue and have a weird shape at the very top, no straight lines, just up a jacket and around. Mexico had a cool hat. Oh! I like it.

That's how I like to see it. Yep. Should do the next one? Yep. Right now? Yes. Whenever you're ready, I guess. Nick will ask.

Right now? Whenever you're ready I guess. Nick'll ask. A month ago in Springs, Texas Taco Cabana introduced their new smaller concept TC 3.0 Terminator which features updated furniture, modernized lighting, and a digital menu board. With these big 2013 ideas the sky is the limit for taco cabana They're gonna love GTA 5, but they'll have to wait six months for online. You know they do shark cards, too It's fucked up. You fucking know it They they got bought by this company, and it's been a couple years, and they're like guys our new concept lights what What is modernized lighting even? couple years and they're like, guys, our new concept, lights. What, what, what is modernized lighting?

Even whatever, whatever's in here. He likes these lights that somebody can do it. Yeah. That an iPad controls, but they keep forgetting the code so nobody can log into it. So it's just a weird blue. You I'm sure I know the code this time. Oh, cool. I can make it blue.

Uh, like how many digits is it for? Just keep trying dude. Yeah, one, one, one, one, one, two. You got it. You start zero, zero, zero, one. The idea of modernizing taco cabana. The idea of modernizing taco cabana is 10,000. They should focus on making the food good.

I agree. What are you talking about? Also TC 3.0? Yes. Where's the 2.0? I don't know. What was 2.0? I have no idea.

We skipped two. Yeah, we're skipping it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're going three, baby. He's made of liquid. Yeah. Whoa. For the last 16 years, Taco Cabana

has sponsored San Antonio High School football being televised with their quote, Taco Cabana has sponsored San Antonio High School football being televised with their quote, Taco Cabana's Thursday Night Lights series. We gotta get in on this racket. What else lets us exploit kids for personal gain as they systematically destroy one another while their dads watch proudly and go, that used to be me. College football? We gotta figure it out.

We gotta sponsor some kind of shitty sport around here. At least the kids in college can get paid now Right and that money should be going in this pocket. Oh, I signed an NIL contract or whatever Yeah, that's right. If we want to if we if we want to get in on a shitty sport. Should we do Austin FC? Oh, yeah, it doesn't it doesn't get I heard that's bad. Yeah Well bad now one more year of them sucking which which is probably guaranteed as long as they don't fire the coach. I think the prices will come down,

and we could probably sponsor the jerseys. I mean, we can just get the monkey out there as a mascot. Dude, with Speed Bump, the armadillo? Yeah. I know Verdecimo the luchador. I haven't seen him around recently. Oh, he's been around, baby.

Yeah, and we could just get the monkey out there fucking, he chucky cheezing around. He can do it. Yeah. He can do it. They can just pay him in like nachos or, they got double daves. You like double daves?

Okay. Yeah, that is what they have. It's like eating concrete. Yeah, they kind of just, you got to just- Donkey concrete. Kind of just, you chew them a little bit and then they sit in your gut.

Yeah. Oh, you can ranch. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It. Oh, yeah. Cool. He's got all the tricks. One more fact. In the winter storm of 2021, 125 of the 160 taco cabana locations suffered damage, costing the company more than $2 million and causing them to close all their locations for ha... Wait, hang on.

For several days, leading to a 20% slump in sales in Q1. Oh, no. Don't worry. They bounced back with their highest Cinco de Mayo saleser. Sales of? The... No, that's not what it says. Sales later that year.

You got it. Don't worry. They bounced back with their highest Cinco what it's sales later that year. You got it. Don't worry. They bounced back with their highest Cinco de Mayo sales, sir, later that year. So when our kids asked, quote, what was lockdown like, we can say that it made Cinco de Mayo a holiday dedicated to the most casual of racism, all time huge for the white guy owned Taco Cabana, where you used

to be able to get, quote, a big red margarita. And when it went away, Nick when it went away Nick was big pissed Nick was big pissed and he found out About that today. Yep. We were we were a couple hours away from going and he went there's no big red margarita Oh you added that after he got pissed today. Uh-huh Wow. Yep. That's hot off the presses Uh now I now I will say I added it before he got big pissed. You just knew he wouldn't. I just knew he would be big pissed.

When I found out it was not there, when I went through the drinks menu and I went, it ain't there. But they did have a Mountain Dew rum watermelon? Yes, that is something that they had. I'm feeling it. I got to level out. Yeah, dude.

Did we get that? Level it. Finish it off. Well, yeah. You can check it out. Well, they were at a strawberry. Yeah. So they just gave us a margarita instead. Well, yeah, they were out of strawberry. Where's the mountain? We've gotten to that part yet, right? No, not yet. Okay, they were out of strawberry

I mean it feels like now's the best time to talk about it because the facts are over but but is it in there does He mention it in this thing or no. Yes. No, is it in here? Yeah It is he He did something? Well, that's a win for him on the naughty board. I know. It's not going to get him off. We're actually going to take one of your naughty boy points away. I'm the naughty cat of the week.

Not if you stop screwing up. I ordered the Mountain Dew. We'll learn about it. The Mountain Dew Major melon rum punch. I said, can I have four of those? And the woman at the counter said, what? And I said the Mountain Dew major rum punch. You see that the bottles of Mountain Dew. And I went, no. And then I turned the little signage that was there. And I said, this one. Oh, and she was like, Oh, I can't see that. Right. I only work here. She said, I only work here. And then I said,

can I get four of those? And she said, yep. Can I see your ID? And I said, yep. Then she swiped it and she gave it back to me. Everything's fine. And then she's like, I'm going to bring those margaritas right out to you when they're ready. After she gave me my number. And I went, okay, weird. And then went and stood over and then she walked over a few minutes later and she went, I'm so sorry. We're out of strawberry. Is lime okay? And I went, yes, because I don't know what that means. Yeah. I kind of looked at everyone else and I was like, was strawberry ever part of that? No, I mean, nope. Didn't think so. I thought so. It's not sergeant strawberry. It's major melon.

So so so here's what I thought happened. The base, I assumed the base of the margarita is strawberry and then they do some Mountain Dew shit because I watched her open a bottle of the Mountain Dew. Right. You did walk over there and I just picture like she's got a big old thing of Mountain Dew that she's putting in the machine going making your margaritas right now. Yeah, and so she unscrewed it and was like, oh, doing that because I asked for cups of water.

She's like, making your margaritas right now. And I went, OK. Again, this is called Mountain Dew Major Melon Rum Punch. Yeah, your margarita. Yeah. And so I went, OK, well, maybe the base is the strawberry margarita and they're out, so they're going to use lime. And then she brought over three lime margaritas and said don't worry I got

that fourth one coming out right now and I went uh-huh. And so we got four margaritas and then they melted by the time we left. About 20 minutes for the food to come out. You can see the regular liquid rising over like the frozenness. Uh-huh. Maybe that's where all the Mountain Dew went. Oh, it evaporated. It got lost. I don't know, dude.

We walked into this building holding them still intact. And it was 80% just a wet drink. So we didn't get the Mountain Dew Major Melon Rum Punch. Made with Bacardi Rum and Mountain Dew Major Melon. No, it's made with lime margarita mix and margaritas and tequila. What's the problem? Yeah, what's up?

I was just checking. Checking what? He was making sure. I was seeing what was in it. Rum. We got tequila. We also got the Cheetos Flamin' Hot Taco. Okay, which when we originally decided on this, we went, oh, it's a Cheetos menu.

And I thought it was a Cheetos menu. And then- And you would maybe believe it too, because they had that shit plastered. Uh-huh. It really was. It was like, sometimes it'd be like a little thing. They had a lot of signage for it. And then when I put this all together yesterday, I went. I got a lot of Cheetos stuff on here.

I kept searching Cheetos menu thing, and it's like August 2023. I'm like, what the fuck is this? But they have it. You go to their website, and they have it. And I'm like, what the fuck is this? So now you search their press release stuff. And in the end of June, they're like, guys,

we're launching this summer, check it out. Summer food fest at Taco Cabana. The same taco that we had before with the Cheetos plus some other shit. And it's like- so this came back. Yes, it has not left since this time, like last year. It's just guys. It's still here.

And if you take a bite of that taco, you can tell that it's been here. They have been holding on to these. Twenty twenty three. And they really just got to move this product. Yes, they do. And move it. They did. Uh-huh. They moved it right on to us with the smallest tacos we've ever seen that Nick still loved because the ground beef

was good. Cheetos Flamin' Hot Taco, fresh flour tortilla filled with ground beef, Cheetos Flamin' Hot snacks. No promises made there. I'll tell you that. Shredded lettuce and Cheetos Flamin' Hot infused sauce. Now that sauce was all over it. Uh huh.

And it was pretty good. I'll say that. What's your favorite Cheetos Flamin' Hot snack? Mine is Cheetos. Yeah, I like the chips. Yeah. I like the brownies. Yeah.

Oh, those are my favorite. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I, those are my favorite. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I thought about that. Like they're tasty cake. Yeah. That's a sign. That's a sign. There's a truck.

There's a truck. Truck has wheels that go from. They are. And we'll get way into the food after we get done learning about whatever. Boy, were we talking about it before going, do you think these are going to be fresh Cheetos or do you think they'll be like crunchy or stale? Stale is- Surely there's no way they could be stale, right?

They wouldn't sell that to us. We're telling you that they were the word stale and you know what that word means because you've bit into a stale chip before. You understand. You don't fully get it until you get one of these tacos. Geet? Is that when you get and eat at the same time?

That's when you go and you get it and you eat it. You gotta get this. When you eat one of these tacos. Suggie or not, I'm geetin' it. Geet it up. Biting into that taco with the resistant crunch of the Cheeto is fucking crazy. And then your saliva just like kind of rehydrates it and then it immediately collapses.

It's soggy to the 10th degree. Yeah. It was weird as fuck. But they also had al pastor tacos. Oh yeah. Street tacos even. Available as a plate or combo, each serving features these street tacos.

Three, oh three. It's okay, didn't think it said these. These guys features three street tacos with corn tortillas and pork, Al Pastor, topped with cilantro and onions and nothing else. Yeah, but those are the, that's the taco that I'm used to. You want cheese or sauce? Go fuck yourself. Those are the tacos, when I think's the taco that I'm used to. You want cheese or sauce?

Go fuck yourself. Those are the tacos. When I think of tacos, that's what I get. Yes. Shaved al pastor. Very good. On a corn tortilla, and I just eat 10 of them. Very good.

And these ones did a good impression of me. Uh-huh. And what about the impression of the al pastor torta, Jordan? Oh, boy. The al pastor torta's available as a plate or combo. The torta is made with a toasted Balu but Billy oh bun yeah Layered with pork al pastor fresh refried beans shredded lettuce they were in there

Pico de gallo and a side of salsa ranch didn't did not get the side of salsa It was it was one of the nine things removed from the salsa bar Nick They used to have 12 well technically I guess 10 were removed because pico de gallo isn't a salsa All-time huge for the white guy Taco cabana where you used to be able to get salsa ranch and when it went away Nick was big So the El pastor Torta was mostly a toasted Belio. But yeah, it was a lot of that. But it was a lot of bun. It's the only time I've had a Torta and thought like, oh, they shouldn't make this.

Every time I go to a Mexican food place, I get the Torta and I just go fucking great. Never misses. Never, ever, ever misses. It's always so good. This was such a bummer, but have you ever thought if only there was more bread What if what if and then and then when you're thinking whether it was more bread and you got it and then there was more bread Yeah, yes, and what if it was early there can't be more bread. I'll take another bite There would be less of everything else and it's made up for with more bread fucking crazy brisket loaded fries, uh-huh fries are seasoned and else and it's made up for with more bread. Fucking crazy. Brisket loaded fries.

Fries are seasoned and include queso, sour cream, smoked brisket, guacamole and pico de gallo. Great stuff. Yeah. Good job. That's what they were. No forks. Nobody got forks. Yeah. Yeah, we had to go, we got, we had to go in hand style.

We were just digging around like little gremlins. They were going in raccoon style. Yeah. Yeah, I didn't had to go we got we had to go in hand style digging around like little gremlins They were going around raccoon style. Yeah. Yeah, I didn't enjoy that very much and I didn't enjoy the queso That was some so you described the queso is like easy. Oh, it was straight up just nacho cheese Yeah, like at the movie theater. Yeah With the round nacho chips. Yeah. Yeah. That's what it was whack Rico's Pete Rico's Pete. And then the Rumpunch. Yeah. And then the Rumpunch, which I already read. Yeah. Well, he read it too. I read it. The person who works there didn't read it. The press material says, quote, the possibility. I can't speak today.

The possibilities for delicious and fun innovation are truly endless at Taco Cabana said Ulysses Camacho, president of America from the movie Idiocracy. Yeah, no kidding. Taco Cabana's got what plants crave. It's Mountain Dew Major Mill and Rum Punch. President and COO of Taco Cabana, we're devoted to giving our guests delicious offerings that they love and trying out new things to let them discover more. This will be a memorable Taco Cabana summer that guests can enjoy with loved ones or solo. How's your Taco Cabana summer going so far? Is it mostly solo? Yeah, it's solo so far.

I'm hoping to get some loved ones involved in it. My loved ones don't care about my Taco Cabana summer. You want a hot girl summer? Get ready for Taco Cabana summer. I'm going to text my loved ones and let them know I'm having a Taco Cabana summer. I'm wondering why guest has been downgraded, though. Yeah, where's the capital G?

Where's the capital capital G? Or is it not there? Are they not proper anymore? And we did it I'm letting my loved ones know right now that I'm having a taco cabana. Well, we're at 36 minutes. Yeah I'm waiting for your text. I'm waiting for it to get back I'm very excited to find out what people think about me having a taco cabana. Did you send it? Yeah, absolutely I think they're gonna be pissed that you think I sent it to you Well, yeah, well, I said I said my left once. Yeah, where's his text? Yeah

Where is it dude? Dude if I find out Richard got one, I would never text Richard. Okay But now I'm looping in Richard forgot to add him It's you review time Guys, that's what we think about taco cabana, but it's important to know what you think also in a segment We call you review. I'm not gonna get up and no I'll hit this one Damn it. I Didn't know that one needed to be plugged in. Damn. It looks like an organ. Let's get up. Go do it. Go play it All right, fine.

Yeah! Dude. See if I remember the notes. I don't. You have to get off. Walk it off. You review. Oh, thanks for the text, dude.

Oh. I'll go. Are you going to talk a cabana summer with me? Dude, this looks like you're having so much fun. I'm having a great time with my talk a cabana summer. All right, who wants to read the first one? I'll do it. OK.

Far away from the paper. You go. All right, from Britt A. Absolutely the worst. Oh, no. Management was more worried about proving me wrong to even notice that the ice was out. Pepsi was totally out, so I opted for root beer.

It was watered down and tasted horrible, so I let management know while asking for a cup of ice BC ice machine was out of ice. So he comes out and tries it and proceeded to tell me it was fine. I said it's watered down. To which he replied, well it is mixed with water. BC I didn't want to stand and argue with him. I just said whatever so yes I am well aware of how a soda machine works That's it machine works. It's mixed with water! I'm a little confused what her problem is. What do you mean? What do you mean the Pepsi is all as out? Is that on BC? It's out of ice. Why does she keep saying before Cinnamon? Yeah. Oh no. Before

Cinnamon I didn't want to stand and argue with him I just said whatever. That's what I'm saying. After Cinnamon. Uh-huh. Fight cinnamon, I'll fight. Oh, I'll fight. That is so cool that your review is about how you know how a soda machine works. Yeah, dude, it must've bothered Britt so much. I know! Yeah, and I'm gonna tell everyone. Yeah, well, it's mixed with water, that sh-

And that was the final straw. I'll do this next one one too because it's short Okay, that's what is long and there's a lot of yelling all right all right Joe B Ordered nachos the sauce was good Meat was good condiments were good, but the tips were stale and old eight Scooped what I could and ate without their nasty chips. Will be extremely cautious about ordering there again! Not I won't go.

Not I won't get that. Dude, that's what it always is. I will be extremely cautious! I will check my six. Right before I order. Clear the corners! Clear no-sale chips, sir! Yeah, can I get an order of the nachos but

get on the ground get on the ground but like are they good yeah what's this I will I will clear room of all ops before I place order I'm turning those off And I hand him a W for my work. I do love that. He will be going back. Yeah. Oh, I'm definitely going to be there. Cautiously. Extremely cautiously. I want the nachos with no stale chips.

Open the door. Poke your head in. Yep. You good? All right. Y'all got regular chips? But here's the thing. We had some stale ass chips today.

No, we had stale snacks. Oh, that's right. They're They were they were yeah, leto's fleam and Cheetos flaming hot Lado's Plato's Plato Cheetos Plato's geek Heat soggy flay on the floor yeah Stabbering style naughty cat of the we're gonna get a bonkers board. Yeah, oh, that's what it is I feel like it should just be for anything. Yeah, right. Yeah. Here's a bonkers moment. It could be for tardiness Yeah, it could be for soggy comments It can be bad boy of the week

I'm excited bonkers board. You gotta watch some Michael Jordan podcast where we go look at this space for the first time All right. This is Cecilia H and it's's a doozy. Uh huh. It starts. Oh, are you okay? Like a Charlie Brown noise. Yeah. Oh, not even uh who puts an A? A U G H. Charlie Brown. Mm hmm. This is the worst managed taco cabana. During the morning hours on weekdays, you have to sit in the drive through forever. And when you finally get to the window, the ladies inside are chatting it up and laughing. Stop having fun!

Not serving customers, nor are they concerned about the drive-thru customers. And practically every time, I get the wrong order. Monday ordered two chicken fajita tacos, got two chorizo and egg tacos instead. Semicolon. Thursday. Dude, how many times? Oh, just keep going. chicken fajita tacos got two chorizo and egg tacos instead semi-colon Thursday Dude, how many times? Oh, just keep going Keep going

Yeah Dude They keep going back Thursday ordered two bean and cheese tacos got three egg cheese and bacon tacos That's a good deal You came out ahead and with better tacos. Following Monday, ordered two chicken fajita tacos, got two egg cheese and bacon tacos. I give up! This place is awful and the service is so slow.

They can't get the orders right for anything. And you'll need a good 20 minutes to sit in the drive-thru to get your wrong order. Pitiful! Can you believe they keep doing this? When I was there on Monday, and when I was there on Thursday, and when I was there on Monday. We'll report back on Wednesday.

Trying every day of the week to see if it gets better. I went on Thursday, I ordered two tacos, I got three tacos. Fuck you! She looks in the bag pitiful. Pitiful! Stop having fun! Fucking laughing it up Put some chuckle fucks in there working

In the biggest taco cabana in the world A mansion it is This is not the most egregious example of this But it does make me think of the type of person who goes to a restaurant to be served. Yes! That's exactly what this is. The kind of person who's just expecting... Yeah. Oh, definitely the kind of person who would snap. Wait on me? Wait on me?

Um, can you come over here? Yeah. Uh, my root beer needs less water. Yeah. Well, it is mixed with water. PC, no ice. I know how a soda machine works. Oh, OK.

Yeah. And those type of people are just the worst. And I'm sure we'll get more of those types of people in the review. This taco cabana does suck. Yeah. Yeah, you know, I mean, I don't. Hey, she was nice. Yeah. But that took forever. Yes, absolutely. It took forever. It was wrong. And the food sucked.

She wasn't even having fun. No, I would have been less annoyed. Mm hmm. Right. Well, she was up on the phone. She was on the phone. There's something that's going on across the street at the tattoo parlor. You know, we don't know where you used to get your inspections. Yeah, we don't know what it is. Maybe she saw a ghost car getting an inspection and she had to call the Ghostbusters. Whoa. Yeah. We don't know what it is. Maybe she saw a ghost car getting an inspection,

and she had to call the ghostbusters. Whoa. Yeah. Yeah. You didn't even consider that. Oh, man. That's why we need to take this camera, because I'm pretty sure it's got a mode that can detect spirits.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, it detects spirits, but it fills up the card so fast. So it blocks every fork. Dude, ghosts are at least 8 gigs. Yeah, absolutely. So that's two whole files, Nick. So funny. And it's going to desync the audio. Yeah, absolutely. So that's two whole files, Nick. So far. And it's going to de-sync the audio. Yeah, absolutely.

So if the ghost is saying something, it's going to be out of sync. So that's what you guys thought about Taco Cabana. Now, what do you guys think of Taco Cabana? I really enjoyed my packing peanut flavored. You said, you took a bite and you said, it's like eating packing peanuts. And because they were just flaming hot Cheetos, I'm gonna tell you, I bit the taco, tasted the staleness, but also then you could just take out a Cheeto and eat it.

And it was fucking stale. Oh boy. I just ate one little Cheeto and holy shit. Oh man. Like it had been opened for a week. Yeah. Yeah. Or August 2023. Maybe.

It's about right. Probably the stalest chip I've ever eaten. It had to be up there as that. It was fucked. It was pretty bad. It was really bad. That sauce that was on that taco was pretty good. I do think their ground beef sucks.

Yes. I believe it's horrible quality. I think it's worse than Taco Bell. It it's gray. Uh not a great color for food. I want to eat. The torta was all bread as we know it was. It's also even more gray next to the bright red next to the flaming hot Cheetos snacks. Yeah, not chips. No, you get you get what they give you. No, we get what we get. That's for sure. Um the torta was crazy. Crazy how what they give you. No. We get what we get. That's for sure.

The torta was crazy. Crazy how much bread it was. Crazy how little there was anything in the sandwich. And all of the refried beans got pushed to the back. Yep. Yep. That was my section. That was my section.

Because I only got two. So Michael and I split it. I was like, you just eat from the back. So I saw it got pushed and then I saw Michael go for it and he went... turned it to the side and went in from the side. It was just bread and beans. Yep. And the brisket loaded fries maybe they had the potential to be good. I'll never know. I only got some salsa and movie style movie theater style queso. That's the thing. I only got some salsa and movie style, movie theater style. That's the thing. I don't even think they had the potential to be good.

I don't think anything about those. And that's why he didn't get the forks. Yeah, that's that's why Nick decided not to get the forks from the. Wow. Yeah, dude. Eric dropping the ball was your grace. Wow. What a good guy. Nick is I'm not sure what just happened, but I'm for it. I'm against it!

Put him on the bonkers board. Good, bad, who knows. But it was bonkers. We need like, prison style mug shots of all of us. To keep the board straight. Yeah, this is good. It needs to be like.5 photos of us. Oh dude,. Yeah, this is good. It's be like point five. Yeah, dude I got some good ones, but before this is exciting uh

No, I'm gonna say this one is this one's like a 24% Wow yeah, this sucked mm-hmm the tortoise sucked the The fries were okay But yeah, it was just shit cheese. It was a total fucking slop fest the not thing. We ordered margarita was pretty good Right it it melted the shit Which was partially not our fault because we were waiting forever and then also not deciding to guzzle it down while we were driving back Yeah, further melted the flavor was still pretty good though But was not Mountain Dew Rumpunch. No

The best thing was the Cheetos taco minus the Cheeto Terrible and it was eh I'm inclined to agree. It was the best thing of the slop we ate I think the al pastor talk the street taco itself had the potential. Oh that's a gas Yeah, but without Yeah, without like some line or some like some salsa verde It was yeah, it was it was shit. It was it sucked It was dry as fuck and it sucked ass it was the chewiest pork too Yeah, and and just dried out like if it was juicier. Yeah, maybe that helps it if they had

Real like actual fresh cheetos it could have been decent. Just that one. If they just did that one thing. But they didn't. And everything else was fucking terrible. This sucked ass. I'm going to give it a 20%. Wow. How do you fuck up a torta? It fucking sucked. This sucks.

It's an average score of 22, which is higher than I thought it was going to get. Taco Cabana, get your shit together. Taco Cabana sucks. Every time we've eaten it, it sucked or it's been Little Caesars. Or maybe one of them. Which is really, really bad for Taco Cabana. Yeah, exactly. Exactly.

When you go to Taco Cabana and you end up with Little Caesars, that sucks. That's not good. That's not good. That's the review of taco cabana. Let us know if you ate it, if you're a little freak for it and you decided that you got a fresh Cheeto. Yeah.

Dude, if you get a fresh Cheetos, Cheetos, flaming hot snacks, that could be a game changer. We don't know. If you get a fresh Cheeto, maybe you're the one who lives forever. I mean, honestly, it's like the golden ticket.

If you got that and it was fresh Cheetos and it was crunchy and that sauce was really kicking, that wouldn't be a bad taco. No, shut up. Why would we go back? I'll drop you off. Remember when you didn't get the ranch? Yeah. And you want to go back there?

No, he's going to go get a, he's going to go get a, he's going to go back with his six extra sauces and go, can I trade this for one range? He's gonna go back for the Mountain Dew Major Melon Rum Punch. He had just enough margarita to get feisted. But they don't know what that is. No, nope. Not yet. Well, Jordan, do we have a 100% fan shout out?

Yeah, this one is from Adam Morse. Adam has a general message for us. He's a 100% fan who says, love to all of the 100% eat listeners. What, what? Whoa, spreading the love. And to all of the great people making the show possible. Oh wow.

Which I also think is them. Yeah, I think it honestly might be them. We're medium on making the show good. You're medium. Jordan and I are fire. We're fire sauce. You're medium. You're so geek-on. Yeah. You're the most water You're medium. Jordan, I are fire or fire sauce. You're medium. You're so geek on. But the most watered down. But then Nick is the breakfast sauce. He comes out of the soda

machine. I'm mixed with water. Sorry. Did either hear what he said? No, what he said? No, Diablo. I'm inclined to agree. Again, he says funny things. He's not joking. I'm not kidding. He's not joking. That's fucking awesome. Holy shit.

So if you want to get a 100% fan shout out, join the 100% fan tier on our Patreon. You can. You go to patreon.com slash 100%. You can join any tier at the lowest here at five but well there's a free tier so you just kind of keep up with what's going on yeah great way to always be informed yeah it's a one-stop shop everything that's posted is posted there so you can see it there five dollars you get access to the discord with with that ten dollar, with the grackle and compliments crackle tier, you're getting the Michael Jordan podcast.

And that's important because this episode of the Michael Jordan podcast that we're about to do, that you can listen to this Friday, we're going to check out our new space for the very first time. Me and Jordan have been to this space. You guys are going to see it for the first time. You're going to be rolling around on the ground, thriving, loving it, feeling the love inside that. But there's a bathroom, there's-

Running water? There's running water. Well, maybe. Maybe. There's, well, no, they pay for the water. So I think there's no water. We just don't have electricity. Yes. Yeah.

There's electricity. There's no electricity. There's no internet yet. There's a bunch of cabinets where we can keep Where we can keep snacks. I got a bunch of crap in my trunk already. We can throw it in there. Yeah, exactly. If you want to help us fill up those cabinets, you can by sending us stuff to the P.O. Box.

Wow, what a subway. P.O. Box 14-3241 Austin, Texas 78714. That's P.O. Box 14-3241 Austin, Texas, 78714. You wanna send that stuff for snacks, new snack attacks, gonna call 100% Treat. That's a good name. I felt good about it. So next time when you're looking like, oh, what's up with the new snack attack?

No snack attack, 100% Treat. Dude, I wanna give a shout out too. I went to a show yesterday at Empire Control Room. Oh cool. And there was an eater there. Oh really? No way. He was like, 100% eat.

He's like, I'm a compliment Scrackle. Oh hell yeah. So yeah, shout out to that guy. That's fucking awesome. That was a fucking sick show. That's cool, what was the show? There was a bunch of people. Mostly Magnolia Park.

Oh cool. I think they were the headliner. It was cool. Was it that outdoor stage at Empire? Yeah, it was like the semi indoor. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because they moved it the day before the show because it was like totally outside. Oh, really? In the middle of the death zone. Yeah.

And they're like, we have heard your request to not die. And it was pretty comfortable. That's cool. That's great. That's I see a lot of pro wrestling there at that spot. No wrestling that night. And no wrestling. When the AC blows out, it feels so good. Oh, it feels so good. Oh, it feels so good. I like AC. Yep. You can also go to store.100% eat.com for merch. Jordan fix the URL. He's like a hacker. Whoa. Jordan's

like a hacker type. I'm learning. And so I'm breaking the website and then learning what I did to break it and then fixing it. Yeah. The government's gonna recruit you. Yeah. I tried doing I hope. Never mind. We'll see. OK, we'll see about that. I tried setting up the international shipping for our store. Ah, and did it work? We had tried so I almost because I got nervous about

taxes and conversion and I went just don't pay him. This seems that's what I was scared of. Just say no. We can just figure it now. Exactly. And that's everything you're doing right now is everything I did. And I went, Let's do some more research on it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's only 54 minutes. We can wrap up when you follow at 100% eat on Twitter and Instagram to stay up to date with everything. Go to patreon.com such 100% eat, stay up to date as well. We did it. What an episode. Taco Cabana's fucking terrible.

You can also rate, subscribe, and tell a friend about the show where we eat food and rate the food and get the wrong cocktail. Missed. Watch this. Okay. True MJ style. No look.

I can do it even better. I can catch this. Come on. Yeah, get him. Put them on the bonkers board.