100% Eat - You and Nick Voted for This %% Pizza Hut Cheeseburger Melt

Episode Date: July 2, 2024

Our Heroes left it up to you, once again, to vote on what they should eat, and You (and Nick) chose THIS?! The Pizza Hut Cheeseburger melt is a por excuse of a pizza and comes with a pickle sauce that really sends the gang reeling. Learn about a gun that makes sharks swim weird. Suggy Stavern Tyle pizza. Don't forget to grab a shirt at store.100percenteat.com we're working on international shipping (coming soon hopefully). If you could fill out this anonymous survey, it would really help us out: http://survey.podtrac.com/start-survey.aspx?pubid=GOq92kfJo4gY&ver=standard. Support us directly Patreon.com/100percenteat where you can join the discord with other 100 Percenters, stay up to date on everything, and get The Michael, Jordan Podcast every Friday. Follow us on IG & Twitter: @100percenteat Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What if we told you you're already off to a great start with so many ways to squeeze the most out of summer right here? From our largest shrimp skewers ever to a Vietnamese-inspired dish ready in minutes, PC makes any culinary adventure an on-budget breeze. I forget to bring out. Oh, he forgot the clock? You dumb fuck. Welcome to 100% Eat, the show where we try every new, or not new, fast food restaurant. He threw me off without the clock. To let you know if you need it, you probably do. I'm your former host, Michael Jones.

Well, I botched it alongside my co-host, Jordan Swears. Jordan, how are you? And how do you feel about me retiring from hosting because he made me mess up the intro because he didn't get the clock ready. We'll give you one more shot, I think. We'll see how you do on the next episode. We are you're very forgiving here One thing I will not forgive is Eric now the time is like as soon as soon as the intro started. Yeah

Well, I said it like that cuz I knew I was gonna get yelled at but if you didn't say you but if you had He likes Well, I said it like that cuz I knew I was gonna get yelled at but if you didn't say you but if you had I got Likes That he's looking at the paper no one of them chance he likes getting you know that it gets him going and ready to donate to cancer What's the right along you'll love it uh Nick knows if I didn't say anything that it would have been like oh trying to sneak the clock You know what I would lean over to Jordan I would have been like that was really professional of him to just scooch over there and grab it while I was doing the intro

Yeah, not cause any waves in the show not interrupt the production. We're in a merciful You're doing the intro look at me I'm not a host but here I am think we set a new record for time to Eric talk In the show this sucks this I'm not a host, but here I am think we set a new record for time to Eric talk in The show this sucks this That was the worst part I know I will I will concede that I should not have gotten up and gone hot Chacha chacha chacha so hot in here already. What do you mean? that I should not have gotten up and gone hot cha cha cha cha cha cha cha cha It's so hot in here already What do you mean? My god

I think the fan was making a difference The ace is on Well we know since he started it late as we've all discussed We've actually been going longer than mid 40 Yeah yeah so we gotta be almost done It's gotta be almost done by now Yeah yeah I think we're halfway through

40 minutes This will be a long one Today we're reviewing, thanks to Nick, Pizza Hut cheeseburger melt. Let's talk about it. No. Why are you saying no? No, no, no, no, no. No, let's see.

Did you vote? I did not vote. Michael, did you vote? No. Well, I certainly didn't vote. I'll be honest, I probably don't know how to vote. For the food? For president?

No, no, I don't vote. I keep it out. I keep politics out of the situation. Just seems too complicated. So we found out that the 100% EAT account did vote and they voted for... And we did last time for the Wendy's episode. Or the Wienerschnitzel. Because Nick keeps forgetting that he's logged into that account and not his regular account

and he voted for this and then we revealed that Nick voted and then this swung and became the winner barely yeah it was very close he'd like a charge like I'm like you look so surprised you didn't know we started posting Nick fucking voted and then and then people and then people got into the Nick gremlin mind of Nick was like the independent Just shut the fuck up and stay out of my damn stop voting for Ross Perot Nader's not running good the There's how Bernie can still win

episode 8 the poll on patreon is open to any paying member of bugs on up On patreon you get one vote give money get vote. Uh-huh That's pretty much it's it's worked out so far for so it's once every like fourth episode We're doing what you guys voted for and we fucking did this because you voted for it and so did Nick and Nick voted for That were the other options. I can look it up. I know Panda Express was in the mix. Panda Express Spicy Chicken. Damn, that would have been so much better. That would have been good.

That would have been like a really good one. And it's spicy, yeah. Nick should have voted for that one, but he didn't. What? What? Oh no. It came down to pizza head. So Panda Express Hot Orange Chicken, KFC Saucy Nuggets,

because they are also doing their own Saucy Nugget. That one was dead fucking last. Yeah, fuck them. 13%. Fuck you. Second place, Jimmy John's Firecracker Wrap. Ah, that's right. 34%.

They wanted. First place, Pizza Hut Cheeseburger Melt, 36%. And also, it shows that we voted for it got a little check mark next to it that's fucked up well that's that's what I was wondering too because when I saw this I mean it was mere hours after the poll went live

I checked to see how it was going and oh a little check mark next to pizza hut I posted in the Slack, Nick voted for Pizza Hut. And he started voting. I feel like he started saying, like, you can't prove it was me. Right, yeah. He was like, I believed you because you were so, like, adamant that, like,

Maybe there was a malfunction. Or, like, I was honest about it last time you asked. Stuff like that. And I was just like, oh, we'll just make it a little fun bit. We're joking around. And then it'll be revealed like Eric did it or something. And then, haha, indeed. You know, I don't have login. No.

Yep. Yeah, I know. It was Michael. No, you pay for the Patreon, don't you? And I still am. You could have voted it. I'm just a regular Grackle. You don't deserve my compliments.

Wow. But then it was revealed that Nick Nick Nick did do it I don't know why you're being so like facetious voted for this fucking shit that we ate Yeah, you sucked it down. You loved every second of it. I saw you drooling all over yourself He was sitting there you going Because on the way there I go didn't we fucking eat this thing already this like Cheeseburger fucking pizza thing and it sucked ass and the whole thing was like you're fighting over what's for dinner eat this garbage Yeah, and it was terrible. Yeah, it was fucking terrible We ate it all over your car, huh?

And then the drop and then the fucking freaks on the patreon voted for this thing again, but a different place Yeah, it was the most folded this one in half though, right?? Yes. The other one was just regular pizza style. Yes. This is a pappadilla. Right. Which is just. Well even a pappadilla is more like a pizza than this thing is. Look at this. They only put the toppings. This is Jordan's remnants. On one side and the rest is nothing. He threw it down and said give the rest to the wrestlers. Yeah. We can't feed the grackles anymore. So he's gonna feed the wrestlers And I don't think the crackles would eat it. No news it as a prop throat. It's um, oh Hey taking out the cheese Yeah, yeah, and the crowd goes one two three fucking taps out

Speaking of you've been on a real cheese bender what happened dude. It's funny because it was on purpose right? It's funny Yeah, it's funny because I woke up this morning, and I looked at the slack and like you were talking about it, but uh-huh Didn't correlate and you're like we're eating this fucking disgusting pizza thing and then I'm gonna have extra pizza And I just put I'm gonna fucking die and immediately Eric's like oh my god I hope I thought you I thought maybe last night was a sleep night for you right and I'm like oh no okay Fair fair fair guess no no this is a dairy hell that I've been this the other day which hasn't happened in a while No, it wasn't at top of mind. I really got cocky. Oh no.

I had an entire pizza by myself. I ate like a whole pizza, like a regular sized pizza. And then later that night I made an entire casserole tray of baked macaroni and cheese. Jesus Christ. And I ate half of that. And then I wasn't feeling so good the next day. Oh, why though?

But then I ate another pizza. But it was- This'll help. But it was only a 14 inch day. Oh, why I ate another pizza But it was a help, but it was only a 14 inch pizza. Oh, yeah, of course. Yeah. Yeah smaller Yeah, and then less cheese and then out of it that night Derept down, you know, we were doing like little like house party party and drinking It was like 2 a.m. And people like we gotta do an order and people got Taco Bell and then I eat that And I and I am the original sin and I got cheese go to the crunch Jordan, but and I got extra cheese You're crazy so then you that was the day before yesterday all day yesterday. I was gone Like literally all day I I took enough the wall

I took sleeping pills and went to sleep at like 11 p.m. Last night just to make it stop hurting Like I knocked myself out, and then I woke up in a haze and you're like pizza pizza pizza pizza pizza pizza Him pizza pizza pizza This could have been hot orange chicken, and then I ate the whole thing oh Did you did and then I said wow you didn't really have to do that you really pushed through and you said Don't worry you also ate so much burger sauce How'd you feel about burgers I put a tiny bit of it on on the hamburger pizza and

It fucking sucked It tastes it was just pickle. I don't know what else is supposed to be in this, but it's just pickle. That offended him greatly. He's fucking howler monkey today. This is, Jesus Christ. Oh, we finished, he had four blue cheeses out

and he went, we didn't use any of the blue cheese. No, he went, oh no! We used the blue cheese and I was like, Oh no, like it was a travesty. No, man, I did it wrong. Now I gotta eat it again and do it right. So the thing about the thing about the hamburger, cheeseburger, pizza, whatever, is that there's no sauce to it. We'll learn about what the food is later, but there's no sauce to it. So they give you a cup of sauce. They give you their, they give you a cup of pickles. Yeah, so they give you like their burger sauce thing.

Pickles is what... But it ain't pickle color. No, it's bright orange like cheese. I thought it was some sort of cheese sauce. I swear to God, I thought it was cheese, and I was like, this is gonna be terrible, and then I went in anyway. Uh-huh.

And then it was pickles. Did you take any lactate or...? Yes. Okay. That also reminds me... You have some on standby, too. I took some, but... In fact, when I was eating the second pizza on day two, any lactate or? Yes. Okay. That also reminds me. You have some on standby too. I took some but um

in fact when I was eating the second pizza on day two I was going oh no um somebody I was with they were like we should take a lactate and I went it's too late now it doesn't matter like like I'd already eaten it you gotta take it with it and then just just to go through the motions I ate it and it did not help but I took two this time yeah so it's not it doesn't help. But I took two this time. Yeah so it's not it doesn't help the pain I'm already in still. It just won't make it worse. It will prevent future pain. So maybe. I will say in all of the time we've been doing this podcast this is one of a handful of times I've ever seen you take lactate when we eat something. So that means you're definitely not it's not

that you're worried about what we're about to eat it's that the distress has been recent and you're going I'm getting ahead of the next wave. I'm going to the beach. Oh dude, you know what? Aloha Mikey? This is great though because if it doesn't help, I can live out Chris's dream and shit myself in the ocean. Oh yeah! Please, if you are not subscribed to the Patreon, the Michael Jordan podcast this last week features Chris,

who I would say is from Stinky Dragon, but I don't know if that's how he would describe himself as he never fucking talked about it. No, it's okay, it's okay. This will guide our best efforts. His dreams, shitting in a river, his new way of shaving, he's evolved shaving. Oh my God. I don't even want to talk about it because that is the show.

It's fucking insane what he's saying. It's insane. I can't even... I forgot about it. You got to listen to it. Thinking back on it now, it's like I've just heard it again for the first time. It's so insane I don't go, oh, right. I'm like, oh my god, I forgot he does that.

Fucking unhinged. Unreal. Unreal. Which is absolutely ridiculous. And also, he didn't know he was gonna be on the show either. I talked to him beforehand and said, like, same day like a week before he's like hey Can you like put me on a list I want to come and I'm like I think it's free you can just show up And it'd be great cuz then like you want to be like on the show

I'd love to have you on the show and like do some stuff Day of it was like new information. Oh, he kept saying I didn't know I was gonna be on the show and also even when You called him up. I thought he'd pop on and pop off. It was him for 27 minutes I was trying to get him to talk about his new fucking show! And don't get me wrong, he was riveting. I'm not completely straight. But it was just like he talked and we sat there and we listened for the entirety of the show. Alright.

And it was ridiculous. I mean, he doesn't... What's up? What are you doing? I can't see that far! It says there's an all-you-can-eat pizza place on the island Okay, and he fucking he typed it on his phone in super tiny text And he's just holding it across the room and he's like waving it at me. He did bold it at least Just okay cool

Hawaii I was gonna say which island Bet I won't bet I won't I bet I won't Well you know how good all you can eat pizza is Yeah Yup I know how good fucking Pizza Hut pizza is Let alone all you can eat random pizza

Sounds like you have some Hut pinions What are your general Hut pinions? Sucks Look if you've listened to this show or you know what our And the thing about pizza, too Don't even need to like recycle them we don't the thing about pizza is though It's not like oh we fucking hate it sucks like Burger King is always sucked it used to be good Uh-huh, and then the switch yeah, and then it similar to the part shift. I kind of hate it even more

Yeah, right like right because like it's like heard To the party shift was when he just snuck in there that was pretty good. Yeah, that's right Who is it favoritism? Yeah, all right Great man cool right, but who sucks now. Yeah Nick sucks sucks toes It's not like feet in there it wasn't pizza. It was more pizza than pizza. Yeah, oh definitely Oh, man, you learn all about it on the ride along um Yeah, it's just it's so bad now that I don't even like I don't even pay attention

It continues to do anything. I don't pay attention to anything horrible expectations every time we have it and we got this guy out here for it look at that look how shitty the pepperoni looks yeah well it's double no one's touching this one because it's not middle piece of a tavern style pizza so which already sucks the tavern style pizza is their other new thing which is hahahaha hahahaha dude that was crazy it hit, you gotta go, you have to go to youtube

and watch that, it was, that was, whatever I expected to happen when I dropped this slice of pizza was not bad so this is their new tavern style pizza tavern style pizza and he's gonna yell at Nick again they have the ride along where he can't say tavern. Stavron. Stavron style.

Stavron tile. Check out this tavern, I almost messed it up, style pizza. From Pizza Hut, it's their other new thing, so I wanted to grab one. It's a double pepperoni, it has regular pepperoni and cut pepperonis. And Michael just went, what makes it tavern stylevern style and um you said you're gonna hate it That's what you said. It's flat flat flat and then cut into squares flat flat flat cut cut cut The end. Can we get from like little scissors we got? Miguel? Miguel? Miguel? Miguel? There's like a big box. Was it like the thick one?

It wasn't that thick cuz taverns part of stubborn style is that it's How's 100% he gone, I mean us your This room is too hot you guys too hot to. I can't wait to get down to Trump country! I'm gonna get to the beach, I'm gonna wave my flags at all the lengths and all the upside down positions. Everyone loves Pizza Hut down there. I found a new flag. What'd you find? I found a new flag that I'm very into. It's like a thin blue line type flag. Do they sell it at Busty's?

No, but don't worry. Nick zoomed all the way in. I saw they didn't have it. Color codes for more thin line flags. Pretty good. Okay. Neon green, military. Yep.

Face jam orange, search and rescue or EMS. I'm sorry. Go back one. What are you saying? The color of that orange. Oh, okay. I thought EMS. I'm sorry. Go back one. What are you saying? The color of that orange. Oh, okay. I thought you were reading. No, it's the same.

What are you saying? Thin blue line, police. Then red line, firefighters. And now my favorite one, thin brown line, water and sewer. Whoa! That's cool. I only salute water and sewer workers, but here's the thing, the line on the very top

Nothing's there. I think it should be podcasters Okay, the real heroes white the real here You keep it the same color and it says podcasters and then you salute it because we're above everyone especially the military and police Yeah, I'd agree with that. I'm starting to think that line ain't so thin if there's so many of them. We're talking about... I'm starting to think it takes a lot of people to keep a society together. That's why the line is getting even thinner, because they have to share more space. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's the one line that they're all splitting. The lines are getting smaller and smaller. Okay, sure. I said I put my life on the line when I drove here today. Where's my flag? Where's drivers? I think it's a subset of podcasters. Yeah.

I would assume most podcasters actually don't drive and they sit in their house. Actually, it's probably pretty not the good ones. Yeah. Anyway, I'm doing it wrong. I so anyway, it's salute water and sewer. Those are that's my new one. Brown. Yeah.

Yeah, that's pretty awesome. Brown. What does it take to be part of because we see that there's space Brown. What does it take to be part of, because we see that there's space available, what does it take to become part of? I think I just have to Photoshop it. Oh, okay. I think I might just Photoshop it and post it and see if people are okay with that. Right, yeah. And people just start believing it.

Yeah, yeah. But here's the thing, if we put it on the Patreon first, then we can have people disseminate it for us. Oh. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then, and then it's like, oh my gosh. Kind of like, so instead of us doing it, we just kind of throw our weight around and let people do it for us.

Kind of like how Nick swayed the vote. Well, I was gonna say kind of like how people helped Brett in his school in Hawaii, but yeah, you know, it's like that. Oh yeah, well, I guess. Yep. To a lesser extent. Still waiting on that fucking check.

Yeah, I know, he brought a bunch of pineapples. Where's the money? His pineapples were good. They were pretty fucking good. When your celebration of life is prepaid in advance, it becomes a gift from you to your family later because no one should have to plan for a loss while they're experiencing one. Paying in advance protects your loved ones and gives you the peace of mind you deserve.

Let us help you plan every detail with professionalism and compassion. We are your local Dignity Memorial provider. Find us at DignityMemorial.ca. Because the Skip app saves you so much time by delivering stuff like your favorite cool treats, groceries, and bevies, you get to spend the summer doing what you really want. Like successfully cutting your jeans into jorts. Shipping the kids off to summer camp. Or winning the annual Schellenberg family water balloon fight. Suck it, Aunt Susan.

Yup, definitely the best summer ever. Squeeze more summer out of summer with Skip. Did somebody say skip? Hey, we should learn about Pizza Hut in the fact section of the podcast. Should we? Yeah. Are you guys ready to learn? Don't look at it so close. Yeah, I'm ready. Our last Pizza Hut episode as Face Jam was July 19th, 2022,

where we ate the edge pizza. It received an average rating of 35. Isn't that crazy how long ago that was yeah No, we touch sucks. Yeah, it doesn't feel long enough, and that's why yeah, that's why we kept going like and we would have continued to streak What is boomy he's got a big smile, then we all look at him and it drops he goes Everyone Jordan said that the burger sauce wasn't good? He went, oh! Oh! Yeah!

Let me ask you this before you get to the next fact. Do you think Gracie would have liked the burger sauce and been in defense with Nick? Yeah. Yeah, I do. Man. My heart says no. I feel the same way. But knowing Gracie.

But it's unpredictable and you have no idea. I was going to say, I don't remember what the Edge pizza was, but I do remember it being called the Edge pizza. If that makes any sense. I remember this thing, but I don't remember it. Was there more Edge? It went to the Edge. We might learn more about the Edge pizza in a later film. We might, we might. We'll learn more about the edge pizza in a later part. Oh great. We might.

We might. We'll get back to it if we don't. Internationally, Pizza Hut is taking big swings and thinking outside the box. The pizza box, that is. As their limited time offering in Japan right now is the quote, guilty euro menu. This menu features items like secret hut melts with all the best pizza parts layered on in one bite and Secret side box with all the chicken you want Kenochi what?

Konichi what? I was thinking gnocchi No no this is good 3 2 1 Konichi what? That's pretty good edit that that. You're right. No, leave more of it. Leave more of it.

That is, I wish the things were- Yoki, they have that. They have that. I don't think they do, absolutely unfortunately. I want things to be named like this in the US. Secret hut melts with all the best pizza parts layered in one bite.

This is when you're doing a parody of a Japanese, like an anime name or something, and it's translated. Secret side box with all the chicken you want. But are they doing it on purpose though? But also how is it all you want if it's in a box? Because it's just like, surely there must be a limit to the box size. If it's all you want, you choose what size box you want.

I'm thinking large moving box. That's what I want. Large? I need a large moving box. You know when you go to Home Depot and you're moving? Small large moving box. That's what I want Small teller box yeah shoe box Safe from the bank filled with all the chicken. I want side what if you want all you can eat stavron box Pizza Hut is currently embroiled in a loss now with their franchisee Eym pizza who operate 140 restaurants in five states.

The lawsuit alleges that EYM missed sales milestones and payments to Pizza Hut, but EYM said that's okay because Pizza Hut lost its title as the largest pizza chain in terms of sales to Domino's. With mind-blowing innovations like quote cheese cheeseburger folded pizza thing and quote, pizza dat go all da way to da edge of da pizza. It's a real shock pizza has lost its standing. The fucking hut got out pizza dude. Oh damn.

So that, see I knew we'd learn about the edge pizza again. That's what it does. That's what it is. It goes all da way to da edge. Pizza dat go all da way to da edge of da pizza. That's what it is. It goes all the way to the edge. Pizza dego all the way to the edge of the pizza. That's what the edge was. They just kept having the pizza go all the way. Unlike other pizzas. Yeah. Not like the tavern style that did not go all the way. Well I guess it did. So it was like no crust pizza?

Well no, there was like some crust, but that's like on the outside the outs like the rim So it didn't go all the way to the edge. Yeah, well no it went all the way to the edge You just can go over the edge. It's not called over the edge pizza. That's what they should call one They call it flat earth pizza. I think that's what we just ate This is the dome that goes over it You can't go all the way to the edge you hit the burger sauce Think about putting a dome over America think about like a big metal. It's got to be iron Otherwise yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah properly that way If it's anything other than iron, I don't I don't know how we're gonna be crispy, right?

Yeah, what we got to do is we got to block the Sun. Mr. Burns style, but we got to do it in a way Will cost so much in resources that it will never recover and monorails So I'm thinking it's it seems to be really in tune with dome over the country I know kidding just you know any Simpsons episode really should be enacting. It's right there um You know any Simpsons episode really should be enacting. It's right there um They say no one out pizzas the hut yeah, but this really just goes to show they can't even pizza No, this is a cheeseburger folded. They're not even they can't even achieve pizza No before they start thinking about out pizza in which is weird too because they're doing they have fries now Which is fucking bizarre their wings were like

Best of both worlds their wings were like medium Like those were that was better than any of the fucking pizza. I thought yeah No, they probably the best thing here was that a buffalo yeah tasted. Oh, yeah, those were full of all right I was wondering where the dressing was and then Nick was hoarding it on the other side. Yeah, yeah Oh, no, no one ate it Yeah, I don't want it now. I wanted it with the fire What do you mean, but what do you mean? This is a chance for you to suck it down without any food slowing you down He thinks you're gonna take a sauce from him and go still eat

I'm in the situation where you don't eat unlimited pizza. You're still going to the unlimited pizza place I can bring it there and see if anybody else needs it Okay, hey guys. I'm not touching this stuff anybody need blue cheese. I just drove this down from Austin Michael does anyone want this? Yeah, you can tell from the from my cup. I think I got the blue cheese Okay here we go Found a headline I love how he's just kind of talking. Right, yeah. This is not a fact.

Found a headline. The fact is he found it. Found a headline from a Michigan website that says, quote, Is this the end for vacant Pizza Hut near Ann Harbor? Quickly followed by the next headline of, quote, Former Pizza Hut near Ann Harbor demolished. That whole state might need a fucking hobby Not a lot of stuff going on. It's if Michigan ain't playing football

No, not much is going on in an is I love the headline is this the end for vacant Pizza Hut? It's almost like it was a plague on the city. It's like it's also vacant. Yeah, right The city is like it's also vacant. Yeah, right Well somebody finally move into the abandoned Pizza Hut what were they gonna be pizza hut? It's been people trying to do so I read into it It's people trying to polish it But the guy who owns it lives out of state and they can't get ahold of them They can't then then they finally get ahold of them and he's like no, I'm not doing that. So they demolished it What do you mean? Yeah, and so how is that the solution which is great because now it's demolished, but the sign is still

a pile of rubble next to a sign That'd be a great picture actually get that sign oh I want to get can we get that lot? Yeah, if we go to if we go near Ann Arbor, let's go to Ann Arbor near Ann Arbor last fact in April of 1987 Anthony Mongelli filed a patent for stuffed crust pizza and took his idea to chains all over the us with pizza Being the u.s. With pizza being the only one to talk with him in

1995 pizza at launch stuffed crust pizza leading to Anthony to sue them for one billion dollars in 1998. Mangiello lost, but we won, because we found out his brother also had his own patent for a dart you shoot into sharks to make the shark get filled with air so it swims weird. Anthony should shoot that at pizza It's a whole family of inventors He took the words right out of my mouth What they're not to follow that's very easy timeline in 1987 this guy invents stuffed crust pizza so they so they just talked to him and he was like I got this

idea here's the patent for stuff I have a patent and then they said we have no interest in that and that's in the 80s in 1995 they launch it and it's this huge fucking Like revolution revolution in by the way. I was never good. I never liked it. It's bad cheese It's different bad cheese. It's not good cheese is bad cheese. It's not a cheese is on this Yeah, they just used like regular cheese. It'd be better, but it's weird cheese. I thought it fridges on the patent I think it's stuck or when you're a kid and you can eat the cheese in the crust. That's awesome That is that's great. So he takes it to Pizza Hut. They say no in 1995 They launched stuff crust and he just goes I have the fucking patent for this

So he has his dad knows a lawyer who's really well versed in patent law, sued them for $1 billion. So how did he lose? The judge said, okay, so your patent says that you put these sections of cheese and then fold the crust over. And what Pizza Hut does is they say

they do a whole ring of cheese and then fold the crust over and then have sauce go all the way to the edge. And this guy went, right, it's the same thing. They're just using different language. If the end product is the same. Threw it out. He gets, they offered him $50,000 to go away before all this. And he went, I'm suing you.

And then a billion. That's crazy Yep, and then so he is that's a little like Ray Kroc situation So he's he's the CEO of like a cheese brand now horse, which is crazy, but finding out that his brother Yes Why is he making him swim weird what's the point of that his- Well, why is he trying to do it anyway? Well, his brother was a diver, and he's like, you know, you go diving and sometimes a shark gets near you and what do you do? You're in their domain. You bop it on the nose.

You bop it on the nose, but he's like, you know, that's scary to people who have never been down here. We need to think of something, whatever. Yeah. So he invented a gun that you shoot underwater with a dart the dart goes into the shark and fills it with gas and Then it gets lighter and starts moving towards the surface For how long I Don't know now. This is like doesn't ever go back to normal like this is on paper or this works, and it's been effected It's a patent. It's a pattern. So I don't know my question nope, but I mean I will say it's a technology

I've never heard of right then right also this guy shot this shark with this thing and then it fucking killed me It just made the shark really bad Weird towards me as it fucking what my fucking arm off grabbed me by the side and then we both lifted to the surface Then I shot him again. He got too light. We went into the sky Oh, so then it's yeah, then it's sky shark, and then I don't know what we're supposed to do in that situation Did you find it? No? It's just pictures of guns and where I can buy them Well, you said I could pick you up a couple you searched guns for sale. I don't you shouldn't do that. I typed in shark gun That's usually probably gonna get a harpoon I would imagine like a speargun shark or a shark holding a gun like I have one of those well I have one

of those water style that's it that's it that's like a foam dart it's shaped like a shark so you know what to shoot with Yeah, yeah, I have that water No, it's a blowfish. Oh You go I'm one of you yeah He's whoa that might be one of my babies. I Don't think it caught on those are the fact those are the facts you guys learn a lot about pizza I learned a lot about shooting sharks

Those are the facts. You guys learn a lot about Pizza Hut? I learned a lot about shooting sharks. I'll tell you that. You never know what you're gonna learn. I swam with sharks once. Really? You have to bop any of them or what? No, I didn't bop them. Did they give you a gun filled with darts? No. They literally threw you to the sharks, huh?

I dove actually to the sharks. You went for them. Was it scary? Not really. Did you die? Probably scared of being Scuba diving learning like one day and then going all right you're going to Bahamas getting the ocean with sharks. Oh, right How do I breathe in here again? I learned 14 hours ago No, they're pretty cool sharks, do you think they're tighter sharks mostly Oh, do you think it would have been less scary if you had a gun that made the shark swim weird?

Yeah, I would have felt fucking strong as shit walking around. I'm in your neighborhood now motherfucker Now let me ask you this if you were in a boat and the boat was sinking Uh-huh, and there was a battery on the boat and the battery was gonna electrocute you but also there was a shark There was a shark, 10 maybe 15 yards away. Would you choose to go swim towards the shark away from the boat? What kind of shark? And do I have a shark gun? You have no shark gun. And it's a shark that will definitely kill you. Is this like a riddle where I'm supposed to like take the battery and throw it? No, this was a story Donald Trump was talking about.

I think I would try and... Are you serious? I don't know how take the battery and throw it. No, this was a story Donald Trump was talking about. I think I would try and... Are you serious? I don't know how you didn't hear about this. Dude, he talked about this. He's been talking about this for years. Yeah, he... This is years old and he's brought it up again recently. He told the story several times recently because people were making fun of him.

He's complaining about like electric batteries and shit. Wait, he's making fun of who? He's making fun of the batteries. Like the batteries are bad for boats. Batteries are bad for boats. Batteries are bad for boats and what you the boat sinks and there's a battery and now you're gonna die He brought a shark over there. He hates sharks and he's got deathly afraid of sharks and he would never donate to shark like Organization. Yeah, he says if the shark people call me I say no shark people call I'm serious, you know that're shark people because they're shaped like sharks.

They're like on the gun. If they said, sir, the shark people are on the phone, I'm not going to give them my money. I'm going to give my money to someone else. He doesn't like sharks. He hates batteries so much. I think his point was like he'd rather go with the sharks. You know how much he hates sharks. Is this the same thing that he...

That said, I would use the battery to zap the shark's balls until it came for cancer. Yeah, listen to this right along, guys. You've got to check it out. And then everybody wins. Now, is this the same thing where he talked about talking to a guy at MIT who is so smart, and he said, what if the boat was too heavy? Yes, yes.

This is the same thing. So he's talking to a boat manufacturer, and he was saying he had an uncle who taught at MIT, so he's smart because his uncle taught at MIT. My uncle is an animator, I can't fucking draw. Well have you tried? You can't say tavern either.

Maybe you're naturally inclined. Neither can he! Maybe you can't animate. So what I like is that I got this second clip where he was like I told that story and people were like Making fun of Donald Trump because he told this story. I go. It's a good story, and then he tells the whole story again Oh my god And he goes I think I'm pretty smart Classic smart guy thing to say that is all you can't trust batteries. Yeah

I think you can't trust. You can't trust batteries. Yeah. You can't trust batteries. You can't trust sharks. I can trust a shark. Was the boat you were on when you were swimming in the Bahamas, did it have a battery? There were probably batteries on it. It was a pretty big boat. They had lights and stuff.

Like double-way phones. Dude, you got so close to that hypothetical situation, you didn't even know. Luckily, the boat wasn't too heavy. The boat was so heavy. No. It was a big boat. People were sleeping on the boat. It was like a The boat was so heavy. No, there's a big boat people are sleeping on the boat

It was like a real slow ass out there in the middle Oh, we had to take a speedboat for like an hour to get to the boat man You get you get on a speedboat for five minutes and you're like, uh, I'm not on planet earthen The little island you're on just disappears Fifty minute drive and then people are thrown up in Gavin's face It's like a 50 minute drive, and then people are thrown up in Gavin's face When you're on a boat, and it's going so fast that you're not in the water more than you're in the waters Oh, yes, it's pretty scary when you're out when you leave land And you just like Michael saying you go for like five minutes. There's no more land and you go, huh?

So we just got to keep going for another 90 minutes. Yeah We're not closer to land. Right. There's no land closer to us. It's like if you've ever been in the middle of nowhere ever with a car and you're like, oh, we're in the middle of nowhere, you're more in the middle of somewhere.

There's a road. And the ocean. It's like, man, you're just going to go, I hope this boat doesn't break. Yeah, I hope everything's fine. I don't have a fear of the ocean. It's more just like common sense. Or I'm going, wow, I hope nothing boat doesn't break. Yeah, I hope everything's fine. I don't have a fear of the ocean. It's more just like common sense. I'm going, wow, I hope nothing goes wrong now.

Because that would suck. We just hope someone gets us as we wade for hours in the water. I don't think AAA sucks. I don't think AAA comes out here. Oh, man, come on. We're only 60 minutes from the shore. By speedboat. OK, but now there's

ocean currents where are you now somewhere else and that where they should put a pizza that's what I'm talking ah just like happen upon one yeah then you feel the sharks a floating pizza yeah like in the city's the crusty burger on the oil rig goddamn yeah they really do they got it baby they got it all uh Jordan I want to learn about the food. Can you teach me? Yes, he got stains on mine. I got so much grease on mine just from like it touching the box, huh? Introducing the new burger melt Introducing the new cheeseburger melt. A parmesan crusted thin crust melt, folded and loaded with beef, applewood smoked bacon, onions, mozzarella and cheddar, served with burger sauce on the side.

The savory, cheesy, crunchy menu item ditches the bun, say goodbye to soggy bun burger deliveries, and brings together a medley of flavors would not describe it as a medley for those craving a cheeseburger all wrapped up into a crispy thin crust do you find yourselves craving that specific thing I was gonna offer you were done done but like no what the fuck are they talking about what this handheld beats a hut with this handheld comma beats a hut has cracked the code for what a cheeseburger should be Okay, and what should be what should have things are as follows? portable already is

crunchy And oozing with cheese, you know when you're eating a cheeseburger and you're just your landlocked Yeah, like you know I mean like you get at the drive-thru and then you have to stay where's the ocean you have to get inside and sit down at a table I hate talking about it chained down to the ground until you're done burger when I bite a cheeseburger and there and it's not crunching in my hands and all over the place this thing ain't fucking crunchy either. What do you mean?

It's kind of burned on the outside. We described it as crispy, but not crunchy. That's what they did for some reason. Oh my God. That's what a cheeseburger should be. It doesn't fucking matter. You come up with something stupid and then you're like, now we find a way to justify it.

Yes, yeah, write copy about this fucking idiots. I've seen madmen Right. Yeah, no, you're gonna be able to see Nick even better Keep an eye on this guy over there. It's see what he's voting for Where to say goodbye to soggy soggy soggy stavron tile Soggy Stavron tile Suggie Stavron tile Dumb word It would be it would be Suggie Bong burger. I haven't done murder yet today I'm gonna try Suggie is the first word see if I get it right

You're on one today Dude Hey, you may have invented a new word and said it accidentally, but somehow it's the perfect word to describe what the fuck you said. It really is. This thing is soggy. At Air Miles, we help you collect more moments. So instead of scrolling through photos of friends on social media, you can spend more time

dinnering with them. How's that spicy enchilada? Very flavorful. Yodeling with them. Yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel-yodel Seth and Riley's Garage Hard Lemonade, a delicious classic with a vibrant taste of fresh lemons. The perfect balance of sweet and sour with a crisp, sesty edge. Welcome to the Garage, the place of refreshing hard lemonade. Available at the LCBO.

Must be legal drinking age. Please enjoy responsibly. I'm so hot. I'm so tired. I'm so hot. Like, like if I were where Jordan was, I would have fell over. I need this wall. I've been leaning against this wall for so long. I'm so tired. I'm so tired. I'm so hot. I'm so tired. I'm so hot like like if I were Jordan was I would have fell over I need this wall. I've been leaning against this wall for so long now. My eyes are closing. They're so heavy 20 more minutes

I'm I'm sucking out. I need a red bull. Oh my god. I'm feeling soggy over here Say goodbye to soggy bun burger deliveries guys never happens I don't what the fuck are they talking soggy fries soggy and soggy fries happen these fries are fucking weird These are soggy fries. What is this? They're crispy on the outside and chewy all around It's like there's it's like they're not filled with anything except like stick. It's like air.

It's like someone shot him with that dart gun. And now they swim funny. Yeah, dude. Why would they do that? The gun isn't shaped like french fries. Now they're going to the surface. It fools you for a fraction of a second. Because the first, like, not even bite, but like crunch, like, whoa,

this is going to be, oh, it sucks. It's just the outside, like 2% of the french fry is like real crispy and you know what that's that's pretty good for Pizza Hut though. It's soggy. It's definitely soggy. Quote, for the first time ever we have created the first soggy pizza. Shut up! For the first time ever, we packed everything you know and love about a cheeseburger. No! Michael's big mouth. Everything you thought you knew about a cheeseburger is about to be elevated.

I thought I ate them. We packed everything you know and love about a cheeseburger into our craveable, thin and crispy, register trademark, crust to love about a cheeseburger into our craveable thin and crispy register trademark crust to develop the new cheeseburger melt said Rachel Antelek Chief food innovation officer at Pizza Hut Unlike a traditional cheeseburger the cheeseburger melt dips perfectly into what we would argue is the world's best Burger dipping sauce we challenge you to find a better burger and sauce experience.

Any cheeseburger is a better burger experience. McDonald's. But what about burger and sauce? You know, even McDonald's, ignore the Big Mac sauce. You want to go burger sauce. Here's where they really, I'll challenge this, and I think that they win. McDonald's puts ketchup and mustard on.

Yeah. Oh. This has, this didn't have that. Hey. No. And I would say it's better than this. Ketchup and mustard is better than this. Challenge accepted.

They, challenge complete. I might touch something, my hands get greasy. It dips perfectly. Better than getting your hands soggy. Would you, would you, shut up. Do you think this thing fucking dips perfectly. Would you would you shut up this do you think this thing fucking dips? Perfectly no, I didn't really but I poured the sauce onto it because there was no way to dip it Yeah, I mean I smooshed it in there, but I would say you get for life. I can't you could yeah, of course you did uh You could also fashion look it's flapping like you get back you can

You could also fashion look it's flapping like you get back you can Using sonar You could fashion a burger into like a way to dip it better your man in on this thing I want it to break so bad. You're almost there. It's just sucky enough to do it. It's because this side is so weighed down because that's where all the toppings are and the other one has nothing. Yeah, it is just, they put toppings on half of the pizza, fold it over, and then go...

And they thought we wouldn't notice. And then they go, this is the best cheeseburger experience you can ever have. Gauntlet throned. Do something about it. Rachel Antelek gets paid no matter what. It's true. If this isn't some succession ass

bullshit. Oh man. Oh I'm the CIFO of Pizza Hut. What's that? Oh Chief Food Innovation Officer. Oh what's that? I don't know. I made the best cheeseburger you've ever seen in your life and it's not even on a bun. Also, are buns ever soggy when you get them? That's what I would say like I mean if anything the burgers cold Yeah, that is the bond. Yeah, I've never had a soggy bun like doing like a delivery

I've also never been like guys. We gotta make the whole bun crispy the whole thing has to be crispy If my burger ain't crunchy Is it even a burger like what the fuck what is this? No, no, it's cheeseburger Okay Now here's the day reading a you review. Yeah, well here's So here's the thing about Pizza Hut. Here's the thing about Pizza Hut.

We have our own opinions about Pizza Hut. But now we want to hear your opinions in a segment that we call... No, we know your opinions and we hate them. I'm pointing at the camera. In a segment we call You Review. Is that still going by the way? Hurry up. Yeah. Hurry up. Who's reading the first one? This is a good one go go for it Michael. Okay. There's a good one um

Feeling gracious to be a like a VI and then a space of the last name a Didn't receive my order or a refund After waiting for an hour I called and was told it went out for delivery 35 minutes prior After waiting another 25 minutes, I called. I was told they didn't have an order for me in their system. Then I spent an entire hour waiting on hold on the 1-800 number to try and get my money refunded. After speaking with the rep for 10 minutes, he told me that Pizza Hut outsources their support line to a third party who cannot give refunds.

So he took my contact info and told me the quote, regional district manager in my area, end quote, would reach out to me about a possible refund. Possible refund. Dot, dot, dot. At some undisclosed point in the future, I wasted over three hours of my life waiting on these smooth brains, and I'm without dinner and out $40.

They- holy shit. Now here's the thing. They got $40 from this guy and he's going, These idiots! These fucking smooth brains! They're not smart like me, a guy out $40 in three hours of my time. Well, this is actually one of the few times I kind of like empathize with them. Oh! Like I definitely have sympathy for V because that's a lot of shit to go through for something that they never got. But also why would you call the 1-800 number and not the store you ordered from? Why would you call the 1-800 number?

I'm not saying that they did. I don't really understand that. It was the right way to get rid of that. I don't really understand that. But they are getting screwed big time. Oh absolutely! Just go to the store and say I ordered the fucking food from here. Yep.

Yep. Give me my pizza. Just give it to me now. I'll be honest too here. I gotta question this right? Because like it's like I didn't get my pizza or my refund Fast food places especially food like pizza they give refunds and food for free so fucking easy Oh, yeah, you go. Hey, you fucked up my thing and they'll give you two free pizzas

I get free pizza from Domino's all the time. I've mentioned this before I my Domino's gets delivered usually in like 20 minutes It's fast as fuck. I've had times before I my dominoes gets delivered usually in like 20 minutes. It's a vast fuck I've had times where I'm like, uh, oh It's taking a little bit longer today But that's fine because 20 minutes is an insane standard like like from like boom to my house like 20 minutes I'm not calling anybody. I'm just going If I got people over I'm like usually gets there in like 20 minutes and it shows up in like 30 minutes And I'm like, that's whatever think nothing of it. I'll get an email later that like 20 minutes and it shows up in like 30 minutes and I'm like that's whatever think nothing of it I'll get an email later that day is like and we fucked up. We're really sorry it took so long

Here's a coupon for a free pizza. Yep. Well, it's like you spend three hours on the fucking phone and you call the 1-800 number I'm just like you don't even have to get no no just go order my food. I don't have my food Give me another food or give me another food, or give me my money back, or give me another pizza, just send another one. Even one that even if, even if it wasn't in their system, which I don't believe, like they fucked up, or the people fucked up, whatever, you go, listen to me, I just ordered there, my pizza's not here, that's fine, just make another pizza and send me another pizza. And they'll send you another pizza. Like it's just, it costs them six cents to make the food.

I think it's weird to call the 1-800 number. That's insane. You're forgetting one major detail. Uh-huh. And that this is Pizza Hut. I mean, it's true. Yeah. But I bet they didn't try.

I just, they called the 1-800 number. Yeah. I don't, the, also just send an email. If you're going to call the 1-800 number, just send an email. You don't, I don't know why calling the number, he waited on hold for an hour I also got you got a question every time someone says our It's all bullshit. Yeah, exactly, but that's the a's experience Jordan What does Chris M have to say Chris M says took a chance on this place? Figuring that it's chain pizza. So it's hard to mess up at the very least

I'd get a hot pizza delivered in a reasonable amount of time. Oh, how naive I was, dot, dot, dot. You know the folks at Pizza Hut corporate make things pretty easy for franchisees. Instructions with pictures, exact quantities, and cook times. It's really just a matter of following directions. I don't like this guy.

American children learn how to do this in kindergarten and only in America Well this particular location would make a great case study in pedagogy What is that? What is that word? Is this the same guy who was like doing his set? Is this the same guy who was like doing his set? That's why I picked it this guy's doing his fucking standup. Holy pedagogy Batman. Hold on. Let me Google this word Oh, Nick. Sorry. You want it Nick? Okay, I'm looking at it. I don't understand

It's PE you got the paper in front of you the method and practice of teaching especially as an academic subject or theoretical This guy's the worst this guy's the worst teacher you've ever had in your life. This guy's a dumb asshole. Prick. Fucking prick. Awesome. They are utterly incompetent. What the fuck does that word mean? Slow, sloppy, soggy, and directionless. I promise you. I promise you. You will be amazed at just how much a group of human beings can put such a display of ineptitude. Oh my god, fucking throw this guy in a fire dude. Just like fall into a volcano.

It's dough, sauce, and cheese. You put it in an oven, the oven literally spits out a pizza for you at the other end. That's actually not how it works. It's not complicated, and I am not even here to tell you not to order from them. Please do! It's truly a sight to behold. That was, that was rough to sit through. I, I, that, oh my god. Shoot that guy in outer space.

Put him in a cannon and shoot him in the outer space. Shoot him with a shotgun, send him off. Okay, this is him talking about pizza. Can you imagine being in a room with that person? No! Imagine meeting in the lobby after seeing a movie. With that person. You would think they know, Hollywood would know

how to make a movie. Also, for a guy who is like look at how easy it is to make a pizza! He's a fucking order boy. Hey, guess what too. He didn't say anything Nothing. He gave us no Why why did he type this review? He didn't say anything. He just wanted to you know, he said you think it would be so hard to mess up and then just

Just his blog about observation on comedy is not getting a lot of traffic No, he figured he'd take his talents to the Google reviews. Oh my god, what an insufferable human being. Yep. I want to read this next one. You want to read the last one? You need a palate cleanser. Yeah, this is the one I was reading that made me.

Alright, here we go. This is Brandon H. Brandon H says, This place is for losers and poor people. Hahahaha Hahahaha Hahahaha Hahahaha Hahahaha Hahahaha

Hahahaha Everyone here should count their lucky stars, they have a job, and so on ordered a delivery that never showed up and called the store for an hour Then some smart ass shows up at my door five minutes from the store two hours later like nothing had happened I sent him packing with that pizza had already already ordered from my dog's Dog work there no Domino's are his dogs Not as a poor people that work there or Who who's the poor people because all that's the other thing pitch that ain't cheap. It's more expensive We got was 50 bucks. That's fucking shit. That's outrageous. We did not even get that much. Dude, we got one pizza and two half pizzas.

Domino's fucking medium. One medium pizza full to nap. Domino's medium two topping pizza $6.99. You get as many as you want. They had that five five five deal back in the day. You get three medium one topping pizzas for $6.99 you get as many as you want. They had that five five five deal back in the day you get three medium one topping pizzas for $5 each. You know inflation. Yeah, it's true. It was $5.99 for a while now it's $6.99 But there is two toppings at least. Oh Dude, that's a good deal. I mean I'll be honest It's a pretty good if you don't fuck with it and add like extra cheese because extra cheese doesn't count as one of the toppings It's bullshit if you do extra cheese and like a topping they still charge you extra It's like the extra cheese cuz extra cheese doesn't count as one of the toppings which is bullshit if you do extra cheese and like a topping

They still charge you extra. It's like the extra cheese is topping my dog But fuck off, but you have like a fucking party You just want it's like you just get the regular pizza two toppings you get like five pizzas Yep, and it's cheap as fuck. Mm-hmm. It's cheap as fuck. It's better And it's not for losers or poor people. No, it's for winners and rich people That's right, and that's why we got our dogs at Domino's That's why we love Domino's, baby. I say I'm packing with that pizza That you already paid for that's also confused right unless he's some sucker paying cash

But but again the thing that you said you wouldn't people say an hour. They don't mean an hour Yeah, then it was two hours. I called them for an hour. Oh, yeah Okay, no fucking shot. All right. Let's review this. You look at your phone call and you're like, sir There was 17 minutes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah exactly. Where's my pizza get packing dog? I already call my dog Domino's. I'm dying What do you mean? I'm dying. Let's review this thing. Dude. We got to do a whole other podcast. Yeah Well, the sooner we finish this the sooner we can get to that one. So I'm out of water though Fuck. Oh, you just don't drink from the sink here, so what did you guys think of? The cheeseburger pizza not the tavern. I mean you can you can rate the tavern as well

What's part of it the what the cheeseburger pizza? Oh, I'm sorry the cheeseburger melt with incredible dipping sauce you statter I'm not there's nothing to do Do it Yeah Get him again like you got him in the car right from the wings. It's like looking up. There's Batman All right, it was putrid Absolutely look that word up. What does that mean? Absolute pedagogy. You just never know how an episode is going to go. You really don't. Don't even try.

As it like congeals. He's back playing with it again. As it congeals, look how gross it gets. God damn dude. Yucky. That's inside me. I mean do you want to eat that? Look at it. I did. Igeal, look how gross it is. God damn, dude. Yucky. That's inside me. I mean, do you want to eat that? I look at it.

I did! I did eat it! The meat is gray. Uh huh. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, I like it. It's gray.

It's gray. It's gray. Alright, let's just put this in the ground, okay? We don't have to explain anymore about Munchits. We don't. Just look at it. It was bad. It was...

Put it in the ground. It's probably... I'm going gonna send this pizza packing. Yeah, yeah Probably the worst thing we've had from pizza hut and we've had some stinkers But what about the edge the edge and pizza that went all the way to the edge it went all the way 35 yeah, so it definitely needs to get lower this thing wishes you have 35 And remember the fans voted on this Yeah, and just and just like winners and so they may have picked the worst thing we've ever eaten. Yep Yeah, I mean really man. It's this I'm gonna rip my own flesh off

All right, I'm giving it a six It's bad He loved it of course you loved it loved it. Of course he loved it. Loved it. Alright, um, the sauce, I can't understand why it's hamburger sauce. Now don't get me wrong, I like pickles. Pickle sauce. It was okay with me. Because I drink pickle juice and shit, but I'm just like, I don't understand how this is a hamburger sauce. If I wasn't a pickle fiend, it would fucking repulse me. So I think it's a very weird pairing this thing is slop city It's like hollow is fucking the inside the fact that doesn't have sauce it sucks because again

It's like it's like a cheeseburger fucking cheeseburger on pizza your pizza hut But here's the biggest thing the hamburger meat fucking sucks. Oh, yeah Even even if this poorly piece of shit constructed mess had good meat I might have liked it. Yeah, but like every bite was like the best part was not eating the meat The little meatballs or whatever the fuck they are. They're fucking terrible. They suck. They're like little sausage No, they're they're terrible. It's just it's just the regular ground beef topping I guess they put on it and their ground beef topping is fucking gross. It sucks. So it's a piece of shit all around.

Even the bacon is like flesh-colored, looking awful stuff. Army Hammer would be going fucking crazy for that shit, dude. Yeah, fool him. He'd finish that, and then he'd finish you. I'm not gonna six it Jordan-style, but I can give it a a very worthy 20% got it. Oh that's right mine was 6% yeah I know you meant to say 13% yeah this thing is 13% each. It's about right. Yeah I would say it's about the best part was that one wing yeah yeah I had one wing and then then Nick went The staffer and tile pizza was also like not great. Like the sauce. No, but it was better than that.

It was better, but like, I just know why you- Is their sauce always that bad? Yeah. I just don't know why you would order it. Look at this properoni. Yeah. Properoni.

It's a little like a crap-a-roni. Whoa! Well, that's the cheeseburger pizza from, cheeseburger melt, from Pizza Hut. Cheeseburger sauce. And now, now look I would have poured it on your paper if it actually came out were we gonna do a snack attack because I got a trunk full of shit do you well what's that no water

I'm gonna die I got no beverage let's do I can't eat snacks you the hundred percent fan and then let's do let's do a snack all right our 100% fan this week is Trey Trey Trey, happy to be here in support. People keep looking at me funny when I walk into stores yelling, I'm an eater. Hell yeah. Shout out to the discord for being a great space already. Lastly, hi Migg.

Hi Migg. Whoa, that was great. You get a shout out from Migg. Thanks Trey. Thank you Trey. So you are an eater. You can sign up. Thank you, Trey. So you are an eater. You can you can sign up. Don't eat this though. Become a 100% fan at patreon.com slash 100% eat. That is where

that happens. Stop, I have to do the rest of this. You can also listen to the Michael Jordan podcast every Friday at patreon.com slash 100% eat. We have an RSS feed for that and you can follow us at 100% eat on Twitter and on Instagram You can check out the video version of this episode the walk and all the yeah that happened earlier looks like All the episodes so far go check it out the video works this time if you want to send us a snack You can send a PO box 14 32 41 Austin, Texas 7 8 7 1 4 that's PO box 143241 Austin, Texas 78714 Jordan what snack are you looking at? You said you had a trunk full. Do you want to do that? You want to do one of Brett's?

We could do one of Brett's. Those are handy By the way, do you want to take home all the stuff in my trunk? Yes. Yes, he does. Yeah, I Just I don't want to be responsible for it anymore. We got oh, I heard this is good stuff This is from Brett. He brought this from Hawaii. This is seedless red lehi Lehing moi just plum Okay, he's not sorry Right in the cheeks right in the cheeks. Yep, you're gonna. You're gonna hate these. Oh god. That was pretty cool actually.

That was quite a ride. That was a ride, yeah. That was weird. I like that. He's going T-Rex hands. Oh I really like, this is crazy. That was weird. You kinda gotta push through it. Why is it, it's sweet, that's so hard to describe. And then sour, and then you come out the other side.

It feels like it's too much but it's not and then it's totally normal. You come on the other side. It feels like it's too much, but it's not. And then it's totally normal. You come out the other side, you're like, oh, I want to do that again. I wouldn't eat like a whole bag of those, but you're like, it looks like eating something horrible. But then you end and go, that was pretty cool. At first it was like. Why does it end salty sweet?

It was like, it was like, it was like kind of tahini at first. That's crazy. It was a little powdery and then it like changed again, and then it kept going and then I made some pieces I thought I was hitting a part where I hated it. Yeah, and it just like it didn't happen. That's weird, dude That's like a fucked up food. It was a fucked up food. I kind of like that's pretty cool We're gonna take all his water for the next thing cuz he's got we're gonna be we're gonna be fighting for water We get you get sink water Pretty cool. We're gonna take all his water for the next thing cuz he's got we're gonna be we're gonna be fighting for water Well, he gets he gets think water. He can think water. I What the hell are those things again? Lehigh?

Lee hing moe seedless red plums that I mean essentially that is crazy It was crazy. I I rollercoast I would go off that I would go on that ride again. Yeah Oh I rollercoast I would go on that ride again. Yeah Oh The aftertaste is so good. It's sweet. Yeah, and it's not overpowering It makes you want to go for more in the middle, but then but then you think about that middle part You're like, maybe I should wait a couple of minutes. Um, I'm gonna give this like I get us a 92 Yeah, that was fun. I'll give it a 90 as well. Mm-hmm. That was a wild ride It's an average score 91 91. Great fucking snack.

What a unique snack. A lot of times like crazy unique snacks are gross. Yeah. That is like maybe not something I keep in the house and like shovel in but like, oh you want to try a fucking crazy cool snack? What is something crazy? That like is good and you don't hate it after you're done? That's top of the list. So here's the thing.

I can honestly say I've never had anything like that. No. Same. And here's the thing that we have coming up on the Michael Jordan podcast this week We're gonna go through the rest of Brett's snacks Well, we'll freewheel it also, but we got Brett's snacks that we're gonna go through. I think it's gonna be pretty good I'm really excited about it. Yeah, but in order to do that we have to end this Okay, and start doing that all right subscribe tell a friend about the show where we reach food to eat the food Stay soggy everyone. Okay fuck you

I'm so hot guys. Stay soggy, everyone. Okay, fuck you. I'm so hot. Guys got a soggy attitude. Okay. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.