2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer - Danny Trejo's Tattoo Is More Famous Than He Is | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

Episode Date: November 25, 2024

SPONSORS: Don’t miss out on all the action this week at DraftKings! Download the DraftKings app today! Sign-up using https://dkng.co/bears or through my promo code BEARS. Visit https://bluechew.co...m with promo code BEARS to get your first month FREE. It's another week of 2 Bears, 1 Cave with Burnt Crystals being joined by guest bear, Danny Trejo! John Segura is out growing his beard back, so Bert had to do his homework for this interview. He has plenty of engaging questions as he learns about Danny Trejo's first Hollywood roles, his gangster roots, and the importance his Uncle Gilbert had on his upbringing. Danny also talks all about his time doing time, how to stay in shape behind bars, and tells Bert a story about how he accidentally joined Alcoholics Anonymous. The two also discuss Danny's new show "Mysteries Unearthed" on the History channel, chicano culture, cars, cry acting, William Shatner, and of course the vast filmography of Mr. Danny Trejo. Check it out! 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 264 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Belfast! I just added a second show on March 16th or as you say 16 March at Waterfront Hall. The presale starts tomorrow at 10 a.m. local time with the promo code TOMMY. Coming up I'll also be in Tallahassee, Florida on November 29th, New Orleans on December 7th, Pensacola December 8th, Richmond, Virginia January 10th. The late show has been added. December 8th, Richmond, Virginia, January 10th. The Late Show has been added. Norfolk, Virginia, January 11th. And Louisville, Kentucky, January 16th and 17th. The 17th is sold out,
Starting point is 00:00:32 so tickets are available for January 16th. All the dates and info are at tomscuro.com slash tour. 100% Two. Two. Two. Two. Two.
Starting point is 00:00:44 Ladies and gentlemen, new episode of Two Bears, One Cave. And finally, my partner is actually Latino. My best friend claims Latino when it seems convenient, Danny. Absolutely. He speaks Spanish. His mom's from Peru, but his dad was white. And when he speaks Spanish, it catches everyone off guard. Coming into Hollywood when you got into Hollywood,
Starting point is 00:01:07 because you came in like legit, like your first movie was Runaway Train. Runaway Train. And one of the reasons that you popped so hard was you were the authentic version of what they were trying to make a movie about. Like you were the real deal. That's kind of what the director said.
Starting point is 00:01:23 I remember when they had picked somebody else and then they wanted me after I showed up and Andre Kajalowski, the director, was trying to tell people, no, look, because it was Eric Roberts, he goes to Eric's face like this, look, face, ah, look, and this other guy was kind of Spanish.
Starting point is 00:01:47 Yeah. Ah, look. Hey! You know what I'm saying? I go, is this guy clowning me or what? How did he say? He says, uh, uh, adversary. It was adversary or, you I feel like against each other,
Starting point is 00:02:05 we look like enemies, you know what I mean? So these other guys look like lovers, you know? So I ended up boxing Eric Roberts for that part. I just watched that this morning, because I've heard so much about the lore of that story. I'm obsessed with like the little things in life that change your life forever. The one choice you make that all of a sudden,
Starting point is 00:02:27 and for you, it was you got a call from someone saying, there's coke on set, right? No, well, yeah. This guy was staying clean, you know, and he called me and said, hey, there's so much blow down here, man. I got 108 days clean, please. So I just went down to hang out with him.
Starting point is 00:02:44 And unbeknownst to me, I got 108 days clean, please. So I just went down to hang out with him. Unbeknownst to me that I was supposed to go down there the next day anyway as an extra. So I walked on the set that night and to hang out with this kid. And I run into a friend of mine that I was in prison with, a guy named Eddie Bunker. Eddie Bunker is fascinating. Eddie Bunker. Hold on. Please tell me stories about Eddie Bunker. Oh, he's awesome.
Starting point is 00:03:11 Keep going. I apologize. But he's looking at me and says, hey, you're Danny Trejo. Yeah. He says, what are you doing here? I said, they're going to give me 50 bucks for acting like a convict, you know? Because, and we laughed because we've been doing that for free for all our lives. So he says, hey, you know what? We need somebody to train one of the actors out of box. I'm like, what's it pay?
Starting point is 00:03:38 And he said, $3.20 a day. And I said, how bad do you want this guy beat up? I thought, I said, hit, I wasn't making that a week. And a day, I want to take two minutes to beat him up. And he said, no, no, no, you got to be real careful. This kid's high strong, man. He might sock you. I said, Eddie, for 320 bucks, give him a stick.
Starting point is 00:04:05 Are you crazy? I've been beat up for free, homie. I started training Eric Roberts out of box for a movie called Runaway Train. And Eric, you know, well deserved, he was a movie star. So movie stars have their own way of acting on the set and sometimes it doesn't agree with the director. I want to rest now and go through the theater.
Starting point is 00:04:30 And everything stops. So Eric respected me. So when they wanted him, they would tell me, go get Eric. I'd go get Eric. Come on, Eric, let's do this, and then we'll train, because he wanted to train. Oh. I'm no caller.
Starting point is 00:04:51 Please be Eric Roberts. I'm sorry. I thought I shut that off. That's OK. That's OK. That's how real this show is. That's okay. I, that's how real this show is. And so, I had, I go get Eric and Andre comes in,
Starting point is 00:05:15 because I was just training him. He comes in, I'll never forget he comes in, he goes, Russian, first American movie was Runaway Train. He goes, you be in movie. You fight Eric in movie. And you be my friend. Well, if you have a prison background, you be my friend has like a little,
Starting point is 00:05:38 wait a minute, hold on, hold on. We're not shouting at each other, punk. You know what I mean? It's like, I mean, and then he leans over and kisses me on both cheeks and walks away. And I'll never forget, I looked at Eddie and said, Eddie, I'm gonna train the kid for 320, but if I'm gonna be kissing that old man,
Starting point is 00:05:56 I want more money. And he said, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. That's European, you know what I mean? Yeah, okay, well, if I'm kissing him, if I would have known, that old man did. He got me a sad card. Yeah. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:06:10 That sad card changes your life. My life. And so I don't wash his back. You know? Let me get that front, too. I mean, it's like, the whole life. Yeah. I started going from movie to movie to movie,
Starting point is 00:06:26 because they were making a whole bunch of prison movies. I got that big tattoo on my chest, and the directors loved it. So I didn't, my first 10 movies I don't have a shirt on, you know, were in prison. And it was funny, directors would always say, Danny, say something prison-y. Hey, we'll kill all you punks.
Starting point is 00:06:46 Oh my God. Where did you study? Safeway, Vons, all the robbers. So it was like, I just kept working. I kept going from movie to movie to movie. And that's the way it's been, my whole career, 1985. 1985, you got out of prison in 68? Yeah, no, 69.
Starting point is 00:07:12 I got out of prison in 1969. I was a drug, I'm still a drug counselor. I worked for Western Pacific Med Corps. We have a detox, all over, we got 13 detoxes. Okay, can I tell you my, there are a few stories, I get obsessed with people, especially anyone who's had a rough background, meaning like the chips were against them,
Starting point is 00:07:33 it didn't look like they were supposed to succeed, nothing was gonna go their way, and all of a sudden they just show up in a major way. And I heard a story, one time I was talking to a friend and he said, you know, Danny detoxed in the hole. Always. Really? Every time I got arrested, I was hooked.
Starting point is 00:07:54 So I would detox in the county jail with like, hey, shut up, bastard. Jesus. You know, that's the way you just kicked, you know, and you gotta remember, this was 1965, 64, 63. You know, when, I remember, well, God, in 65, 63, when I got arrested, it was like nothing. I mean, they were sending people to the gas chamber
Starting point is 00:08:27 or selling dope, you know, nobody knew. That was crazy, you know what I'm thinking of it, yeah. I want to go back to Eddie Bunker and I want to, what does it feel like, what does it feel like when you've been in prison? I mean, I have so many fucking questions for you. Going to prison has got to feel, it's got to give you anxiety.
Starting point is 00:08:47 When you put on prison clothes again on a movie, was there a moment of like, oh God? That happened, actually, it was funny, because when the first AD on runaway train handed me that blue shirt, I kind of laughed, you know what I mean? When the first AD on runaway train handed me that blue shirt, I kind of laughed. You know what I mean? I just couldn't crack it open, put it on. And no.
Starting point is 00:09:12 He said please this time. And he told me to leave it open, do my shirt off, you know, because of that big tab blue, and I left it off. And I just stood there, just like, kind of like, just reminiscing. And I'm stood there, just like, kind of like, kind of like, just reminiscing. And I'm watching everybody and they're all being stupid. But, but, because everybody thinks prison is this like,
Starting point is 00:09:35 you're out of the way, I'll kill you. It's not, man. Prison is a very scary place, but nobody can show it. You know, it's like being with your girlfriend in a haunted house and you know you're scared, but you can't show it, you know? And, because in prison, you learn to smell any kind of weakness, any kind of fear, any
Starting point is 00:10:12 kind of sorrow. You can pick it up. I mean, what's wrong? You ask somebody, what's wrong? I got a letter, you know, something. And so... Oh, you can, oh, you know, something. And so... Oh, you can, oh, it's so crazy. I didn't, I just realized you also have personal shit
Starting point is 00:10:29 happening to you while you're in prison. Absolutely, see, that's why, like, a lot of people tell their girlfriend, hey, you know what, cut it loose, let it go. I can't deal with this. Oh, yeah, because you don't want to deal with the ups and downs. I get a letter one week and I don't get it for three weeks.
Starting point is 00:10:43 You're like, what the fuck are you doing? Yeah, yeah, you cut your wrist. You know what I mean? I've watched people cut their wrist because they didn't get a letter. It's like, whoa. You can't depend on the outside. You are no longer on, you're on an island.
Starting point is 00:11:00 And people, it's, let me say this, a wife has three children, her husband's in jail. So now for her to go visit, now he's in San Francisco, she's in Los Angeles, she's gotta get a babysitter for two days, three days, and she's got to like drive up, take a bus, whatever, get a hotel, sleep in the car, and go visit for a couple of hours.
Starting point is 00:11:25 And so it's not like an easy life either way. And so when I cut everybody loose, I don't write anybody or talk to anybody. And I just, you kind of like institutionalize yourself you kind of like institutionalize yourself to this is my world, while this is it, this is it. And so you start acquiring everything it takes to make you comfortable,
Starting point is 00:11:59 and get as comfortable as you can. and get as comfortable as you can. It's the only way to keep from going totally insane. I mean, literally. And people think, well, I'd rather be in the hole. No, you wouldn't, because that's where you go crazy. Nobody there, nobody to talk to, nobody. You're just there all by yourself. You learn, there's nobody there. Nobody talked to them. You know, they're all by themselves. You learn, you adapt. I used to do the wizard of Oz. I used to act the whole, give me the little shield Dorothy on that whole. The whole thing.
Starting point is 00:12:38 Really? Yeah. Wait, where did that, were you a big wizard of Oz fan? Were you a wizard of Oz fan? No, I just remembered that movie. Get some holiday shopping done this weekend. Pick up some touchdowns. They're on sale at DraftKings Sportsbook. DraftKings has doorbuster profit boosts and bet one, get one promotions on all types of touchdown bets. Let me tell you how easy it is to sign up over at DraftKings. We were doing a show Friday in Tampa.
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Starting point is 00:17:15 He's going, what the f-? Is someone in there with him? Guards would walk by and I'd scream, did you kill my sister? Because of the Wizard of Oz. It was like, ah, trail's going nuts. would walk by and I'd scream, did you kill my sister? Because of the Wizard of Oz. It was like, ah, trail's going nuts. You know, and so, but you make yourself kind of go crazy so the environment can't make you crazy.
Starting point is 00:17:39 You understand? It's like, I'm doing this, they're not. And you've got to be strong enough to know you're doing it. That is a really profound statement. I'm certain there's like a therapist that's hearing that going, yeah, it's called dot dot dot. But yeah, I know what you're talking about, where you go, I'm not, this is so bad right now.
Starting point is 00:17:58 I bet there's been that have been in war that go, I have to contain my surroundings. Absolutely. Holy shit. So that's, man, I have to contain my surroundings? Absolutely. Holy shit. And so that's, man, I did that for months. And I play a great Henry Lawton. Ha ha ha ha. She gave me water.
Starting point is 00:18:16 Ha ha ha ha. How were you the first time you went to prison? Oh God, you don't go to prison. It's like, in order to acclimate, you start off in juvenile hall. You're in juvenile hall and from juvenile hall, you maybe go to a camp or something, and then from there you end up in youth authority,
Starting point is 00:18:44 and then from there you end up in youth authority, and then from there, you end up in youth authority, then you end up in, so you've already like, you know, this is your lifestyle. You know people, but people that have trouble is that do something that gets them sent to prison the first time, so they know absolutely nothing about the lay of the land. It's like not having gone to summer camp
Starting point is 00:19:09 and then going to college. That's a bad analogy. That just shows you how white I am. It's like not going to sleep away camp. And then all of a sudden you go to college, you're like, well, I never went to sleep away camp. I'm so nervous, I miss my parents. Sleep away camp, I like that.
Starting point is 00:19:24 We have such a different life. I have been given every opportunity in life to succeed. And I'm obsessed with your story because there are little things I know people hear the wrong way, but I hear a certain way. Like your uncle Gilbert. Love him. Okay so I do too and I'll tell you why I love him is like it tell everyone about Gilbert real quick before I start I because I've heard stories about your uncle and what he meant to you and who he was to everyone around you and what you saw him as but tell everyone. No Gilbert first of all it's, my grandmother had 11 children, all right?
Starting point is 00:20:06 Gilbert was the last one. So basically, they were out of care. They just, they're done with kids, you know what I mean? And my uncle Rudy went to college. He was the one before Gilbert. And then Gilbert was kind of left on his own, you know? And my mom and dad, my mom and dad were perfect pictures of the American dream.
Starting point is 00:20:31 If you work hard and own a Cadillac and a pickup truck with a camper, you've made it, and a house, and you've got a wife that's basically an indentured servant. I don't think my mom ever left a house, and you've got a wife that's basically an indentured servant. I don't think my mom ever left the house. She was like, we have the cleanest house in the world. You know what I mean? And I'll never forget, we had plastic on our couches. And I guess, you know,
Starting point is 00:21:08 I don't know, people you won't sit on. But their whole thing was right there. And the one thing, I know it sounds selfish, but they never had time. They were always had their stuff. I can remember going to my mom when she was on the phone. Mom, mom. shut the fuck up. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:29 Well what? And go through talking to her. Wow, and then my dad, you know, talk to him, hey dad, I just go and bust you with this phone, asshole, on the phone, my boss. Was your dad born in Mexico? No, he was born in Texas, the same thing. Born in Texas, and that is, correct me if I sound silly,
Starting point is 00:21:46 is that Chicano? Yeah. Okay, so that's Chicano. And so my dad was like, dad was tough, he was bad. Now, if I went to Gilbert, and he was on the phone, Gilbert would go, here, oh wait, hold on, hold on, what's up, hold on, yeah. All right, let me get on the phone. You know, he always had on yeah all right let me get the phone you
Starting point is 00:22:07 always had time no matter what he was doing yeah he'd be running somewhere yeah Gilbert yeah yeah what's good yeah well you're jumping the car let's go you know I mean it's just and so that's who I gravitated to the guy that had time for me and the guy that had time for me had to be a drug addict and an armed robber. A stud. He was a stud. He was a stud. Good looking dude. Tough as fucking nails. Everyone respected him. Taught me how to fight. Taught me how to fight. And everything he gave me allowed me to succeed in the path that I took being a drug addict, an armed robber, penitentiary,
Starting point is 00:22:47 lightweight, welterweight champion of every penitentiary I was in. And I was in all, and so. You were in all of them. You were actually in all of them. Quentin, Folsom, Solidad, Vacaville, Susanville, Sierra, those were the ones that were built when I was. So I was obsessed with Blood In Blood Out.
Starting point is 00:23:08 I loved it. I was obsessed with it. And that's when I started getting into Nortenos versus Sudeños. Sudeños, and so they started, what they were doing at this time, correct me if I'm wrong, but they were trying to break up Mexican gangs in prisons. So they would take anyone who was anyone
Starting point is 00:23:23 and just shuffle them around. Well, it was funny funny because when I was doing Blood In and Blood Out, I met a guy, Mario Castillo, Mario Castillo. And we were talking and I said, hey, why don't you come in and get your part in this movie? And he said, we can't because they were Sureños, right? And Quentin was the Northern receptionist. They were all Norteños. And Amaro was so tough that in a Norteño prison,
Starting point is 00:23:57 he's wearing a pair of shorts that say LA County Jail. So he's saying, I'm Surenio. But he's pushing foreign some pounds. Nobody mess with him. And it was, he said, hey, you know what? We can, we got the word from the mafia. No Sudanios can work on any prison movie because of what James almost did. who no Sudanese can work on any prison movie
Starting point is 00:24:29 because of what James almost did, screwed everything up. Wait, what did James almost do? Well, he... I loved every James almost. He did a movie called American Me. I saw that one too. And the problem with that is that he made the leader of the Mexican mafia, he said that he had gotten in juvenile hall, which is an outright lie.
Starting point is 00:24:56 Oh my God, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh yeah. I remember that scene, yeah. It was an outright lie. And then some other stuff that wasn't supposed to be told. And he paid some guys that were like skid row bums that had been on inside, he paid them cigarettes and stuff on the street to tell stories about the mafia. So he got in trouble and so they shut it down.
Starting point is 00:25:27 So the war was out. So the Blood in Blood Out, we were inmates, but none from Southern California. And our movie, Blood in Blood Out, got a lot of acclaim, man. American meme died because everybody knew. You know? I'm gonna claim man, I'm gonna claim that I'm gonna die, because everybody knew, you know. I mean. I mean. I mean.
Starting point is 00:25:47 I mean. I mean. Please be Edward James almost. Fabian. Fabian. Wait, let me just, I'm gonna. Sure, take it. Hey, in two days, I'm killing you, two days.
Starting point is 00:26:00 So get all your stuff, insurance, all that stuff ready. I'm in a podcast right now very important and two days, okay You'll be dead Yeah, I'm the guy doing it I'm in the Russian mafia Hey, I'll call guy doing it. I'm in the Russian mafia. Good to see you, man. How you doing, brother? Hey, I'll call you back in a little while. All right. Love you, man.
Starting point is 00:26:31 I love you, too. It's so funny. This guy got out of prison, right? We took him under our wing. Yeah. And he stayed out. And then he got a part in a movie. But he couldn't go because it was out of state.
Starting point is 00:26:47 It was the one about Hot Fritos, Hot Cheetos. Yeah. So the Hot Cheetos is a crazy story. Even even even LaGoria and I knew her and she called me, Danny, can we get him in? I don't know, let me see. So we went down to his parole officer. He couldn't go out of state. He's on parole.
Starting point is 00:27:12 We go to the store and took him donuts. And hey, oh, Trae, we took pictures. And then I asked him, hey, look, you know what? We got a movie, man. He's a, can he go, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, take this picture. So we took a couple pictures and he went to. I can't believe I just told a guy that just got out
Starting point is 00:27:29 of prison I was gonna kill him. Can we edit that or just bleep me saying, I'll give you a high five? But so, I forgot what I was saying. No, we were talking about Gilbert. And we were talking about going to prison and just like. What he did was he gave me the tools necessary to survive. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:49 In the path that I took. Well, he did, yeah, he turned me on to drugs. Yeah, yeah, yeah. At a quite young age. This is where people get hung up. You first smoked pot when you were eight. Eight, yeah. Eight, and heroin at 11.
Starting point is 00:28:02 Yeah, but people say, oh my God, that's terrible. But any weed smoker has gotten a puppy loaded. Uh. Okay. My sister. That's true, that's true. There's nothing better than a high puppy. And so.
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Starting point is 00:30:41 I happened to be, well, I was actually bothering my grandmother inside the house. She told me to go out there with Gilbert because he had two friends. And they were reading the Bible. Because there used to be these guys that came around and they would sell this huge red Bible,
Starting point is 00:31:01 just big with gold trim. And they were only like $88, but you know, 10 payments for five years. Yeah. I remember I had buddies who sold those. They would go door to door. Northeastern Company was the name of the company. And they would sell Bibles, they'd sell encyclopedias, because back in the day before the internet, if you rolled in with encyclopedias, this is a way to get your family into a different situation. You have all the information of the world in your house. We bought those.
Starting point is 00:31:29 And so it was funny, but so I go out there to be with Gilbert, so she sent me and they were smoking weed. And all I remember hearing is, let's get him loaded. I can still hear that. Let's get him loaded. I can still hear that. Let's get him loaded. And that was it. I got loaded.
Starting point is 00:31:52 It was funny because people that get loaded, they were going to get loaded. People that weren't going to get loaded. People that weren't gonna get loaded, I don't know, I gave Timmy Sanchez weed, like my next door neighbor, and I'm smoking weed, he got sick, he started throwing up and got sick and went home, right? Never got loaded again, didn't you know drugs. I stood there and giggled, you know, and so I went from weed, heroin, I caught my uncle shooting heroin and threatened to tell if he didn't give me some money to know what it was.
Starting point is 00:32:37 I just knew he was doing it, so I did that and that was it, I was found it, you know. Really? And I became like a full blown alcoholic because now that bug opened up, you know, and heroin, you can't beat 13, 12, 13, run around, scoring heroin. I used to just go up to one of the connections doors
Starting point is 00:33:04 and like my uncle would wait in the car, I'd go, hey, give me some heroin, and shut up, you better, I'm like, ah, wait, wait, wait. I'll kill you, go on, take that. God. That's so crazy. It's interesting you say that about people that get loaded
Starting point is 00:33:24 are gonna get loaded. Yeah. Because my wife can't smoke Huh? If my wife smokes weed, she throws up immediately exactly I mean, that's just so that some people are born with the bug or whatever it is And other people want some people it's like I watch some people drink and you're like, yo I don't think alcohol agrees with your system, you know, like they just turn into a different person. It's an allergy of the body coupled with an obsession of the mind. Your body's allergic to it, but your mind's obsessed with it. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:34:01 It's like beer. My dad, I had gotten sober. And I would sit, me and my dad would watch, there used to be Saturday fights. Every Saturday we'd have fights. And we'd watch him on TV and he'd sit down, six o'clock, right, and we'd sit there, open one beer, right, and we'd be watching the fight.
Starting point is 00:34:22 And there's a six pack in the, and 10 round fight, and he's like, ah, one beer! And then I, dad, you want another beer? Nah. I was like, well then why'd you buy six? I couldn't stand to see him, it's like stupid, beer is a little to be in the icebox.
Starting point is 00:34:45 I'm always shocked when I go to dinner with my wife and she has one glass of wine. And I go, what are you just trying to stain your teeth? I was like, let's get on to one, let's get after it. Yeah, I- I've never understood, I know people that order a mixed drink and aren't done, they're ice it. It's like what this? And so I don't drink
Starting point is 00:35:12 like normal people. And I don't shoot heroin. Well, normal people don't shoot heroin. You know what I mean? It's an obsession, an obsession of the mind. So how did you turn it off? I know you've had a lot of great, I say men because I think they were men, but a lot of great men that kind of like just gave you the right advice at the right time. Well, you know what, it's like one of the things that,
Starting point is 00:35:37 like I started going to AA by accident, all right? Everything happens by accident, but there was a big party in our neighborhood. I was in Pacoima, and that was the murder capital of Los Angeles in 19, when I was, 1959. Pacoima's right there, right? Yeah, Pacoima. And I mean, we were killing everybody.
Starting point is 00:35:58 And there's all these cars parked out in front of this house, and hold it. This is our neighborhood. They're having a party in the murder capital of Los Angeles. They're not inviting the murderers. What the hell is going on? So we stopped, went to the trunk of the car to get the tools necessary to crash parties. And so we got entire iron bumper jacks, I have 38 snub nose, a case of beer, three bottles of wine, half pint of whiskey,
Starting point is 00:36:30 I was already loaded on Red Devil's pills. And so we crashed, you know, you can't knock, you just kind of go bust. Yeah. And the first thing we saw was a big sign that said, we care. And we're talking about what? And all these people, they were coming up with coffee cups,
Starting point is 00:36:51 you know, like, hey, you want the coffee? And I always told my troops, don't split up, stay together. There's 20 of us, you know, we got them. But what the people did was like dividing, he had everybody in little groups of four telling them about the perils of drinking. Everybody's drunk. And this guy comes up to me and starts talking about,
Starting point is 00:37:17 he was alcoholic and now he don't drink. And why don't I put that stuff outside and join him. I said, hell no, I got penitentiaries to go to, fool. I didn't know what to say, but I left, and we all left. And I mean, this guy whispered a curse to me. He said, Maybe I don't wanna hear it. No, I'm telling you.
Starting point is 00:37:38 He said, Danny, if you leave this meeting, you will die, go insane or go to jail. And I thought, screw you. That's a stupid thing to say to a 15 year old kid. We left. Two weeks later, come on out, we have the house around it. I was busted, arrested again and gone too long. And so it was like a pattern.
Starting point is 00:38:08 I always, I've never gotten arrested sober. I've never gotten, I mean, I've never gotten arrested that I wasn't loaded on heroin. You know what I mean? And so it was like, is that my problem? Using was my problem. I'm the problem. Drinking and using is my medicine. Part of the thing, yeah. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:38:39 No, I know to go to meetings in every institution. The damn Frank Russo, Frank Russo, Frank Russo. And I say that because he told me never to mention his name. But he actually, show up to Spanish Entry, he's there, he shot a couple of people in front of Sun Valley Receiving Hospital. He was there and he came,
Starting point is 00:39:15 Danny, we gotta go to this AA meeting, it's awesome, blah, blah, blah. I gotta AA me, he said, no, no, no, AA, they got cigarettes. And I said, I'm a journeyman convict. I got cartons of cigarettes. He said, yeah, but I know that, you know, hey, we can get coffee and cake.
Starting point is 00:39:33 I said, come on, I got that in my cell, what the hell wrong? And then he says, there's women coming up. What? They brought women to AA meetings in prison? They don't have women to myself. No. You know, so. It's a fucking no brainer.
Starting point is 00:39:52 I signed up for the meeting, but the problem is when you sign up for something, you can't say, I want to go to AA to see the women. You got to say, I want to go to AA to deal with my alcohol problem. Now once you say that, that goes in your jacket. That means everywhere you go, oh, you have alcohol problems. So the mandatory, every institution I went to, I had to go to alcohol as long as we end up. And so I go to this meeting, and it's actually a pretty good meeting.
Starting point is 00:40:26 That's where I met Johnny Harris, my sponsor, right? And he said, the only thing that's gonna beat you to Quentin are the headlights on the bus. So yeah, and I said, yeah. I thought it was a compliment, you know. And it was funny, because when we pulled up to San Quentin,
Starting point is 00:40:48 right, 10 years later, I see the headlights hit the wall and I said, hey, let me walk in front. I think everybody on that bus had heard John Ayers because everybody knew what I was talking about. And that was it. And I went to AA all the time, because I had to. Yeah, that's interesting. When you went into AA meetings, did they do,
Starting point is 00:41:12 like, I really, when I say I know nothing about prison, I just know what I saw in like Blood In, Blood Out. So like, but did they have like an Aryan AA median, and a black AA meeting? No, those are all the same. You know, everything else is segregated. Solid Ed is the worst, because when you're walking into Solid Ed,
Starting point is 00:41:35 the guards are trying to keep things equal. Yeah. They're trying to put white, black, Mexican, all spread out. And if they send you to the African-Americans and you're a white guy, you better make a quick turn somewhere. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:41:59 You're Mexican, same thing. We segregate ourselves. Oh, really? And they usually don't want to make a big hassle out of it. You know, they just leave it alone. And uh, that's what the tables all have four. Yeah. And four people. And so it's a prison is probably the most right now place in the world. The most right now right now it's all happening right now. If you want to be present, go to prison.
Starting point is 00:42:28 That's where the term, I got your back came from. Really? When we're talking to each other, I got your back. You got my back. And people don't even know that. They use that, hey, I got your back. That means like, I'll watch out for you. But that's for real, I got your back. That means like, I'll watch out. I'll watch out for you. But that's for real.
Starting point is 00:42:47 I got your back. So if something's happening, I'll check this, check, you know what I mean? I'll let you know, whatever it is, because I don't know what, you know. And that's why I always call the right now place. Right now you can die, right now you can almost die,
Starting point is 00:43:02 right now you can get away with it. It seems like I would, I feel like I would act a day late on any threats. Like they'd be like, they'd be like, oh, I like your hat. I guess you can't wear hats in prison, but like, can you? Taylor hats. They go, I like your hat and I go, oh, thanks.
Starting point is 00:43:17 But then that would mean my hat's getting taken from me. Yeah. And then I would be like later, I have a very big head, size eight. You probably maybe want to talk to someone else. Yeah, yeah, you can't let anything be taken from me. Tell me about, was it Ed Bunker? Eddie, he was awesome.
Starting point is 00:43:35 He drew out, this is like the wildest thing I ever heard, he drew out maps of how to rob places. I can't believe that's an occupation. When you came out of prison, if you wanted a couple of scores, you would go to him and depending on what they were, how much, he would tell you what he wants. And if you were any good, you know, and knew your game, he could, he'd go with you, you know.
Starting point is 00:44:09 But if you were just something with, then you'd have to pay him, you know. But he was amazing. And most of the people that bought robberies from him got away, you know. And then how did he get involved in movies? How did he, was he a consultant? You know, yeah, actually him and Alvin Sargent,
Starting point is 00:44:32 who was outsider, he was a writer, director, they wrote a screenplay called, I mean, No Be So Fierce with Dustin Hoffman and Gary Busey's first movie. No Be So Fierce with Dustin Hoffman and Gary Busey's first movie. And Dustin Hoffman came out of prison and went to buy a robbery. That scene is in, but it's actually my uncle and me. Anyway, so.
Starting point is 00:45:03 Dustin Hoffman buys a robbery from him. And that's how he became, he was famous. He went back to prison after that. And then him and Sargent finished writing that when Eddie was in Terminal Island. Alvin Sargent would go up to Terminal Island, the visiting room, and they finished writing it. Jesus.
Starting point is 00:45:34 You know, and uh. Seems like such a misplaced genius. And so then when it came out, it was a hit, unbelievable movie, right? And uh, Eddie was probably one of the most brilliant, one of the most brilliant people I knew. I mean, he was a captain's clerk. And he was the captain in San Quentin has a clerk
Starting point is 00:45:58 because the captain runs the whole institution. That's the top dog. Yeah. And he basically counts on his clerk. So if a guard was like messing with my tattoo operation or my booze operation, I could pay Eddie and say, hey, can you get this guy transferred? And yeah, okay, it costs you 100, 200,
Starting point is 00:46:27 whatever it's gonna cost you. And Eddie, when he had his stack of papers for the captain to sign, and all of a sudden, two days later, that guard was on the 6 6 p.m. To 6 a.m. Guard out there in the bay somewhere, you know Wow, and if he had that kind of power and he was that smart it's crazy Is it do you think it's wild that like that one to two that you got on your chest?
Starting point is 00:47:01 Became like almost like a calling card. Like a thing you did in prison. Hey, that is the most recognizable tattoo in the world. So recognizable. And so funny. That was more recognizable than me. I mean, it was literally people went to con and were talking about doing this movie with me and who, who this guy oh the guy with the tattoo yeah dude i mean so many movies it's so many movies you see that and you everyone knows who it is it's funny because harry harry super jude ross he uh he uh he hated it because it was one of his first tattoos and so the lines are very thick.
Starting point is 00:47:46 Oh, he's the one who drew it? He's the one who drew it and did it. But now... Jesus, look how jacked you are in that picture. Now they've gotten so thin, they've gotten so thin, the lines have gotten so thin, the tattoos are like paintings. What are the words above it?
Starting point is 00:48:06 We'll cross out one of them. One's Danielle, my daughter. Yeah. You know, the other one was a mistake. Hey, that one's gone. We misspelt it. That one's gone. And I put my son, Gilbert, and Dan.
Starting point is 00:48:26 You name your son Gilbert? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's badass. That's my boy. That's badass. Is Gilbert's son still in prison? No, he's out. In fact, we got him out.
Starting point is 00:48:38 The governor, I talked to the governor, and he's, yeah, yeah, that's enough time, so we got him out. And then I talked to Newson, governor and he's yeah yeah that's enough time so we got him out and and then I talked to Newson and got Mario's Mario's son out you know wow and how much how much of prisons like like okay in another very white guy analogy when you look at gymnasiums from like when Arnold was working out and Gold's gym to where gymnasiums are today, they've grown so much.
Starting point is 00:49:07 They've got polar plunges and IV drips and they've got deprivation tanks. Compared to where they started, how much have prisons grown? They took most of the weights out of... What? Yeah, out of prisons. Well, the problem was that the police, the guys would, you know, guys would be up there five, six years, lift the weights, and all of a sudden come out on the streets, and they're monsters.
Starting point is 00:49:34 Yeah. You know, and a lot of the police started to, wait a minute, you guys are breeding monsters. And so they took the weights out. So now all the guys are coming out still ripped, but. Push ups, push ups, air squats. I do the prison burpee where you do it and then you. It's funny, I used to see guys doing squats
Starting point is 00:50:04 with guys on their shoulders. Yeah. Boom. And so it was, you know, everything, you adapt to everything, you know what I mean? And so a lot of the weights are probably at the guard's house. Do you think you're in such good shape right now because you've worked out your whole life?
Starting point is 00:50:21 Yeah, absolutely. Are you 80? 80, yeah. You do not, my dad's not 80 and they, the hurricane down in Florida and I was like, I was like, I think you should come out to LA. He said why? I said, well, didn't mom fall on the ground the other day and you just left her there to sleep? And he was like, yeah, that's, yeah. And I was like, well, if you guys can't get off the ground, maybe we should get you out of where a hurricane's coming, but you're
Starting point is 00:50:43 in fantastic shape. I still work out, and I still walk, and I still do whatever I can. I have to. You know, I'll sleep for like four hours, and then I'll wake up, and then I might go live some weights, come back to bed, sleep some more, then wake up. I don't know, it's weird, but I'm staying in shape.
Starting point is 00:51:05 I'm still staying in shape, staying weighed about 180. Yeah. When was the last time you thought about drugs or alcohol? Like in an honest way, you're like, God, it would be good to have a glass of wine. Not, no, I'm not really, it doesn't really hit me like that. I'll be like working on the yard,
Starting point is 00:51:27 working a sweat or something, and you think about, about, Weiser, la cerveza, mas fina, mama la, mama la, mama la, mama la, mama la, but a beer on a hot day will give you a headache, so you drink another one. You know, okay, so now that's two, and then when you got two, it's like, all right.
Starting point is 00:51:49 What are we doing here today anyway? You got a buzz going on. So I don't, it doesn't, it doesn't, I don't know how to say it. That's not my taste anymore. Yeah. You know, and I hate not being in control and You wouldn't it's funny police no matter I'll be speeding they'll stop you trail what the hell who you doing going so fast
Starting point is 00:52:24 I was a I was on the freeway on the 170. Yeah. Yeah. And I'm in the diamond lane and I'm jamming to the restaurant, right? And about 65, beautiful Riviera, 85, wow! Damn, wow!
Starting point is 00:52:42 Pulled over. What the hell you got in this? You know, that's when we started talking. He said, get out of the diamond lane, because I was, by myself. By yourself. I do that sometimes when the cop pulls up, I just go like this.
Starting point is 00:53:00 And he says, he says, stay out of the diamond lane, OK? Is that your thing? You like cars, don't you? I love cars. Really? It's funny. I got a 1936 Dodge.
Starting point is 00:53:17 And I love that. My grandfather. You can pull these up on the screen. I'd love to see any of these. My grandfather had a 1936 Dodge. And it didn't have a clock. And so my uncle Gilbert used to deal weed. And that's the second one, the black one up there on top.
Starting point is 00:53:38 Oh, wow. And the Oh, wow. And the It's like a Peaky Blinders car. And we would drive. My grandfather would sleep for two hours during the day like a Peaky Blinders car. And we would drive, my grandfather would sleep for two hours during the day, so we'd steal the car. And my uncle had a big bowl,
Starting point is 00:53:52 and it had Sense Mia in it, right? Yeah. And I'd listen to the radio, I would count the songs, so, because the clock didn't work. Yeah. So it would be like the time, we got two hours.
Starting point is 00:54:05 And so I'd pull up to a house, and it's two joints, three joints. And we just keep driving, so hour and a half and we go back home. Oh wow. And so, but that's why I got a 36 Dodge too. That's great. Wait, I love, can I tell you my favorite thing
Starting point is 00:54:23 that Mexican men seem to own is the whistle. It's like my buddy, my buddy Felipe does it all the time. And it's, I always wonder, are there different whistles for different things or is it one whistle? There's a whistle, and that means danger. Yeah. What's the whistle if you see like a beautiful chick and you're trying to
Starting point is 00:54:48 tell your friend? We had a parrot that did that. That's so fucking badass. That's my car right there. That's your actual car? Yeah. Oh, that's beautiful beautiful how many cars do you have I think nine low riders nine different low riders yeah I got a fun building right now the most gorgeous nineteen nineteen forty nine Chevy stepside pickup truck oh. It's absolutely stunningly gorgeous. Oh my gosh. The black one. The black one. A five window, but it's beautiful.
Starting point is 00:55:42 Car culture is, I feel like it's, I feel like it's predominantly an LA thing. Oh yeah. I feel like anyone else that's into, their car culture was big in like Indiana in the 50s where they'd drag race and stuff, but every culture in LA is into a car, a different type of car.
Starting point is 00:56:00 And like your southern California states, you know, like Texas, New Mexico, Arizona, you know, they have the best weather. So, you know, the cars, the paint jobs and stuff, and they're, God, I love them. Well, if I remember songs and cars together, I can go, like, I remember the first cars together, I can go, I remember the first time I heard NWA.
Starting point is 00:56:28 We were in my Volkswagen Fox, we were smoking Marlboro Reds, and they put on NWA, and I was 16 years old, and it blew my mind. Give me a time in a car with a song where you can almost transport back into that moment. I can remember a song by Bob Dylan. You used to run around in the town, didn't you? Didn't you?
Starting point is 00:56:57 Oh, I just heard that, yeah. And it was funny because it was a long song. And when it first came out, they used to play it back to back two or three times. And you would be like shooting heroin. And you'd be like nodding. And you'd wake up, and the song was still beyond.
Starting point is 00:57:15 You know? And you're, damn. Didn't you? I remember that. And it was like, you know, you didn't go back. There's so many songs. Yeah. Were you the same age as Richie Valens? No, he's a little older than me. I think he was two years older than me. I remember that and it was like, you know, they go back there's so many songs that yeah Were you the same age as Richie Valens? No, he's a little older me. I think he's two years old two years older Did you guys went to the same high school? Didn't you?
Starting point is 00:57:32 Junior-high Do you remember when Richie Valens came out? I don't know what it is about Mexican culture that I'm obsessed with but all those movies came out when in a time where not much representation of of Mexican culture was shown and so there's like weird things that I'm obsessed with, the Zoot Suit riots, and like because they were all parts of movies that I saw. But man, Richie Valens, I was obsessed with him because he was the one guy dating the white chick that was authentically Mexican. Donna? Donna. And I went to, I got kicked out of San Fernando High School and they sent me to Monroe High School
Starting point is 00:58:11 and I had to take a ceramics class. I took a ceramics class and she was the first one to say hello to me. Really, really sweet heart. Oh, Donna. I knew Richie, we started talking, blah, blah sweet arts. Hi, Danny. Oh, Dan. I knew Richie, right? We started talking, blah, blah, blah. And I had to do this, what is it, a project, ceramics.
Starting point is 00:58:40 And he would just do this, and we did a wine glass and rocks, and we put it in a kiln, and it was a beautiful wine, I still wish I had it. And that was it, and I passed the class. It's crazy to think that that kid, who was probably so lost at the time, would turn into you. Will you pull up Danny's movies for a second?
Starting point is 00:59:05 And I wanna talk about Trejo's Tacos. So your tacos, this is gonna sound, once again, like the whitest thing in the world. My sister nannied for the guy who you partnered with to make those tacos. And I think he was a business partner of yours. Who's that? An Indian dude.
Starting point is 00:59:21 Oh, Ash! Yeah. Are you kidding? Yeah, isn't that crazy? God! Yeah, so we used to, sidebar, we used to get Trejo's tacos all the time for parties because we'd hit up, my sister would hit up Ash's wife.
Starting point is 00:59:32 I forgot her name. Yeah. Beautiful, beautiful. And they got a divorce, or they're getting a divorce, yeah. Oh really? Oh, she's on the market, guys. She is beautiful. Indian women, I slept on Indian women.
Starting point is 00:59:43 I never hooked up with an Indian woman. I wish I had. It doesn't matter. It's not them, it's us. That's what my fourth wife finally said. It's not us, it's you. I gotta tell you, if anyone's gonna watch one movie out of all these, and in my opinion, and I'm telling you, this is the thing I want you to walk away with this podcast. If you're having a rough day right now, we have a lot of kids that are just like trying to figure their way through life. Maybe I'm not the best shepherd, but Inmate number one is such an amazing movie about a man whose journey was not supposed to be that journey but it turned out to be.
Starting point is 01:00:25 If you think you're down on your luck and you think, but it doesn't happen for guys like me, it really wasn't supposed to happen for Danny. It really was not supposed to happen for Danny. But you did something that I swear to God, I woke up today and I was like, that's going to be my new thing. is you said, I just wanna help, I'm gonna see what it feels like to help people. And when you help people, in just the littlest way, you were talking about the very first person you helped was an old lady who you were helping her take her trash cans in
Starting point is 01:00:58 and she thought she was getting rocked. Yeah, I said, I'm a robot then! Shut up, I got a trash can. And you know, God pays us back. I mean, like I said, Mario Castillo, when I talked to him in Quentin, and eight years later, after I met him, I run into him in a narcotics anonymous meeting.
Starting point is 01:01:20 I don't know if I told you this, but I run into him in a narcotics anonymous meeting, and 10 years ago, he saved my son's life. Literally, my son was dying in a hotel room with friends, my son, he's got the key to my safe. So I'm in Germany, and he's got money, and you got money, you got drugs, you got friends around you.
Starting point is 01:01:43 And so, I mean, he's literally dying. And Mishko, who was a friend of my sons who grew up with me, he's like, look at that. And he calls me, and he says, man, Gilbert's dying, he's got that dough in there. So I call Mario, and Mario, don't worry, I'll find him, I'll find him. I'm like, well, okay. I'm ready to split, I'm gonna leave this production.
Starting point is 01:02:11 I don't care about the money. And then about six hours later, he calls me and says, I got him, don't worry, I got him. Yeah, he's here, yeah, he don't got no shoes, but I got him. Oh, damn. And it was funny funny because the two guards that were guarding this crack house, right?
Starting point is 01:02:29 Yeah. I didn't know but I knew one of them knew me and one of them said, who was that crazy guy? He came up and said, don't move, I'll kill both of you. And walked right, and Mario, if you look at a Chicano gangster And Mario, if you look at a Chicano gangster in the dictionary, it's got his picture, okay? Don't mess. And he's not like that big, he's just a tank.
Starting point is 01:03:01 And then I got home three days later, we took him to a friend of mine's recovery house Renee and it was a rim of the world up in up in Lake Arrowhead and I remember as we went through the clouds my son goes well All plans of escape route And and he's got 10 years clean. He's in the DGA right now, he's a director. He's leaving for Japan tomorrow to direct some big music video.
Starting point is 01:03:36 Oh wow. Don't tell me they know God, homie. He'll pay you back, maybe not in your own time, but he will pay you back. I think that was the most applicable thing I got from that movie was by you helping people, people started helping you, and the world started working for you. And I just was like, you know,
Starting point is 01:03:57 in everything we're going through in this world right now, so many people are about me. How do I get it for me? And as opposed to how do I just help the average person, so if you're listening and you're a little lost, maybe just help go get an old lady her shopping cart at the store. Just something, or if you see a shopping cart
Starting point is 01:04:15 sitting in the middle, don't get outraged. Yeah, you move it over and do a solid. Now out of all these movies, what was your, if you go, hey, at Danny's funeral we're gonna play three movies. And then these are his movies. The funeral's gonna be a five hour funeral. I would say Spy Kids. Yeah, fuck yes.
Starting point is 01:04:36 I would say Heap. Oh, fucking, I keep looking into the room. How great was Heap? I know you were in it so you can't really say, but that fucking movie was, we would, that was in First Round Sound, my buddy had it, and we would go and we'd watch Heat in Surround Sound. Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do.
Starting point is 01:04:59 Oh my God. That movie, I did Heat with Robert De Niro and we became friends He loved my kid. He loved Gilbert. He think Gilbert was a genius Because we went to dinner with Robert De Niro Gilbert my daughter and me we went to dinner with Robert De Niro when when we were doing desperate Machete and Robert asked me, Danny, do you remember this,
Starting point is 01:05:32 do you know this French director that did something blah, blah, blah French, blah, I'm gonna watch a film. And I started to say something and people was, oh, I, you know what, I love him. They started talking, they spent the rest of the night talking about the idea of movies. Me and my daughter played with our food.
Starting point is 01:05:55 But they became really good friends. And Robert De Niro gave my son the key to Texas University because he donated all his memorabilia there and so my son got to go in there and check it all out you know my son's got his phone number and uh and what a crazy cast. I did Heat and and me and De Niro kind of made friends, you know? And then when we asked him to do machete, yeah, yeah, absolutely. Yeah, I mean, I keep going back. My favorite character other than you in that movie
Starting point is 01:06:37 is like the outlier characters are the better than De Niro and Pacino. And I always say like, Fal Kilmer's character in that's so underrated. It's such a... You know what? Well, I was so upset that he didn't win an Oscar for... Tombstone.
Starting point is 01:06:56 Tombstone. Tombstone. One of the best Westerns ever. If it comes on, I watch, from where I turn it on, I watch the rest of the movie. Absolutely. If I ever see Tooms, probably one of the most quoted movies in my opinion of our generation. The Godfather, Goodfellas, very quotable. I mean I quote American Me and Blood In Blood Out are two fucking movies that I was obsessed with as a kid. But fucking, goddamn Tombstone.
Starting point is 01:07:30 That was unbelievable. I'm your Huckleberry. That's like, oh, what a great- I did a film, recently just came out, it's called Seven Cemeteries about zombies and stuff. And then we've got, right now, we've got Unearthed. Unearthed on History Channel.
Starting point is 01:07:54 Yeah, yeah. Yeah, eight episodes coming out. By the way, History Channel's got my number. I love them. Everything they fucking do. God, I love them. Everything they do is so good. And I love the, I watched the first episode and it is phenomenal, but I know all those dudes.
Starting point is 01:08:08 I used to work on Travel Channel with those guys. William Shatner. William Shatner, I'm gonna, I gotta, it's not a podcast if I don't tell you a story about me. William Shatner, William Shatner, that's how you gotta. William Shatner one time. This is so bad, man. I took a general meeting with him.
Starting point is 01:08:22 Been, oh, I met with him, I met with him in a podcast and was like, wow, I was like starstruck. He said to me, he said, there's a scene in the movie where my character cries and he goes, in William Shatner's way, he goes, can you cry? And I said, I think so. I said, but it's kind of silly, because if I cry, I feel stupid,
Starting point is 01:08:44 so I start giggling at myself. And he just switches in think so. I said, but it's kind of silly, because if I cry, I feel stupid. So I start giggling at myself. And he just switches in his seat, and he goes, I'd love to see that. And I went, like right now? And he goes, yeah. And so I started crying on a couch with William Shatner, and laughing, and crying and laughing. And he just was like staring at me,
Starting point is 01:08:58 and he just kept me going forever. And he was like, fascinating. He's unbelievable. You know what's so funny? It's like my son did a movie, right? He did a movie with me and him. And it was called From A Son. And in it, he dies, he overdoses,
Starting point is 01:09:14 and I'm his father. I go into his hell looking for him. I don't know, he's dead, right? Yeah. And I run into his little girlfriend, and I threaten her life, show me where he's at, and he's dead. And he said, show me, you know, we're walking into his body
Starting point is 01:09:28 and I'm supposed to cry in it, right? Well, I don't know, I can do like John Wayne. Okay, pilgrim. My son's showing me baby pictures all week. Hey dad, look what I found, man. And this is my, oh, look what I found, man. And this is all my daughter, yeah, I remember. And so, when the scene, we're out in the middle of the damn desert, it's freezing cold,
Starting point is 01:09:52 she's taking me to his body, and my line is, did you kill my son? And she screamed, no, I loved him, he was my only friend friend and she was crying. I started crying. But now wait, this wasn't like a manly cry, okay? No, this was like Mokko's, you know, you know how you're trying to say,
Starting point is 01:10:17 unfamiliar, unfamiliar. I couldn't stop, man. God, I cried for every time I wanted to cry in my life and And so finally when he said cut the whole core was crying everybody and he comes in a nice acting day, I go you little bitch Yeah, I finally figured out what he did yeah, and uh God man. It's like that's going to And God, man, it's like, that's going to Cannes right now,
Starting point is 01:10:48 that this movie. Is it really? Yeah, yeah, so that's. You guys, you have so much, I wanna go back to the History Channel show for a second. What episodes, what are the episodes? There's eight episodes, you know all the episodes? No, I just know, they're unbelievable. I've seen some of them and they were amazing.
Starting point is 01:11:03 I like history anyway. I fucking love history. And by the way, History Channel, if you're listening, more shows like this. I don't need to see people making knives. I want this. Yeah, my teacher, Mrs. Finley, right? She was like crazy about the Navajo Indians
Starting point is 01:11:22 or like, I forget, but she was also obsessed with, what do you call it? The Amazon River, and that's got such a history. I mean, it's unreal, this is before time. And she had these dead piranha fish in a big jar, and I always used to like get bread and put on the top of the jar. Might get hungry. And, but she always talked about this river and this,
Starting point is 01:11:54 and I would always disrupt. And I hated the fact that I'm studying the damn Amazon River in the fourth grade. Come on, I'm never getting out of LA, lady. And we got an LA river here, tell us about that one. 50 years later, I'm doing a movie called Anaconda. God dang it, all your movies. All the damn Amazon River.
Starting point is 01:12:16 Yeah, you're on the Amazon River. Ice Cube. J-Lo. J-Lo. John Voight, who I know, Eric Stoltz, all these guys are asking questions. That crazy lady gave me the answer, I knew the answers. Hey, how come those are all,
Starting point is 01:12:34 oh, that's due to the rise and fall. Cube, Ice Cube goes, I didn't know all that shit, Danny, I thought you were a gangster. I lied. I said, you know, I thought you were a gangster. I lied. I said, you know I read a lot when I was in prison. Come on, I'm going to tell Ice Cube, oh my fourth grade teacher mentioned Finley Dog. Shit.
Starting point is 01:12:57 I love that one day at lunch Ice Cube leaned over to JLo and was like, he knows a lot about the Amazon. I was obsessed with, when I was a kid, you are older than me, you're my father's age, but we're of the same generation when we didn't have the internet the way it was. So all you had were books, and the few books we have were like on the Bermuda Triangle and like Atlantis, and everything about this series is stuff that I'm fascinated
Starting point is 01:13:26 with. Especially the first episode I saw, it's all about, I just watched this, I just listened to this podcast about the lighthouse of Alexandria and it was lost for years. And in 1960, this guy went sponge diving off the coast of Egypt or wherever it is, and he uncovered the stones. In that first episode, they uncover stones and they're in a straight row. That feeling of being an explorer, I kept thinking, if being an archaeologist was just a little easier, I would have loved to do it. Like those first three years, it's got to be exhausting where you're learning shit you don't care about.
Starting point is 01:14:02 I just want to go do the digging and then grab the lady and get in the plane. God. That was so funny because we were in Texas and they were building this building there and then they found some bones right and the contractor was like so mad yeah because it stops everything they gotta be in dinosaurs and stuff, and I love that. That's the one thing I think I ever got a good grade in was like history, you know, and just knowing stuff. But it's so funny, it's like the stuff that's really, really interesting, you just really don't need to know. Math isn't interesting but you
Starting point is 01:14:48 really need to know. I said to someone the other day he said the lighthouse of Alexandria and I went I've never met someone I could talk to about this. I was like all this stuff you're supposed to know I don't know any of that shit I I only know the crazy, stupid shit. But all right, I'm gonna get you outta here. Congratulations on the series, Unearthed. Is there anything else we need to cover? The 10th, we have eight episodes. Okay, I'll cover it.
Starting point is 01:15:19 Congratulations on the new series, Mysteries of the Under-Earthed, with Danny Trejo. Eight episodes on the History Channel, premiering December 6th and last But finally not least. What is the third movie they play at your funeral and I'm Hoping it's what I think What is what the third The three movies that movies they want to play at your funeral. We've got Spy Kids, we've got Heat, and by the way, you're covering everyone at the funeral.
Starting point is 01:15:49 My kids are happy. And Machete. I knew it, I fucking knew it. Better have that one. The fucking, the, I get the girl. It's so funny, I love to do that. People say, God, I thought you were taller.
Starting point is 01:16:02 Why was I tall enough to kiss Jessica Alba. Oh, yeah. She's awesome. She was just so unbelievable professional. It's crazy. And I don't know how to say it. It's like Selma Hayek, same thing. Selma Hayek, beautiful lady, right?
Starting point is 01:16:24 And when we were doing From Dusk to Dawn, they had hired all these strippers from different clubs to work, because they gotta be naked. And Selma was like, so almost crying. I said, what the hell's wrong with you? These women are so beautiful. Bitch, what the hell? But no, but see, but it's like, it doesn't matter.
Starting point is 01:16:56 You know what I mean? It doesn't matter. It's like how we feel about ourselves. And God, I said, yeah, two minutes and I'll be brushing your hair. Two minutes and I'll be like, oh, she almost did it. And she's so, how do you say it? Humble, humble.
Starting point is 01:17:16 And I'm mad at it. I can be so beautiful and humble, shit. If I was that beautiful, I don't know if I'd leave a mirror. Yeah. I definitely wouldn't have clothes on. I'd spend a lot of time naked in front of the mirror. Brother, this has been an absolute honor. Thank you so much for taking the time. That mom is mine, dude, thank you.
Starting point is 01:17:35 I am such a fan. I am such a, such a fan. And I'm more of, I mean, I'm more fan of just the man. The work is amazing, but the man, you are a legend. Just an absolute legend. Did you hear that? Thank you, brother. Here's what we call, Two Bears, One Cave.

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