2819 Church - Fruit That Remains | This Isn’t What I Asked For | Acts 12:12-16 | Lonnell Williams

Episode Date: August 10, 2026

Our dynamic message series FRUIT THAT REMAINS comes to a powerful close as Pastor Lonnell Williams teaches from Acts 12:12–16, where the Church is gathered in earnest prayer for Peter while carrying the weight of what they have already lost.They were close enough to hear the answer, but not yet willing to open the door. What happens when the last answer still hurts and what God gives does not look like what we asked for? Pain can tell us what happened, but it cannot tell us what God will do next.

You may take your seat in the presence of the Almighty God. Way maker. Miracle worker. Promise keeper. Just who you are. Light in the darkness. Bridge over trouble walks. It's just who you are.

Mother to the motherless. Father to the fatherless. Doctor in the sick room. Lawyer in the courtroom. See, we stop saying those things because we got to sedi but somebody needs a lawyer this week amen

we don't have to over spiritualize it somebody's going to get a doctor's report and they need the great position this week let's God be the glory my name is Lana L Dawson Williams I'm the executive pastor here at 2819 Church one of our communicators

we're just excited to be here on today you know it's it's so interesting how God can kind of meet you in different ways in different moments and in different seasons. At the 8 o'clock gathering, I don't even know what to call it. I don't know if that was deliverance. I don't know what happened.

We didn't even preach. We just laid hands. We were casting out demons at the 8 o'clock gathering. I don't know if we're going to put that one up on YouTube yet, but we was pulling that out. The Saints was walking the aisles. We saw, we just, we felt there was a young lady in the room that just, had a demonic spirit on her and we called it out and she came up front and then all of a sudden all types of women were coming up and it was just the lord was with this at the 10 30 it was tight

but it was right uh because today we're talking about a subject it's not easy to accept but it must be heard we're talking about grief but grief in prayer and that's a hard subject so I don't want you to be caught off guard. We're not going to shout today, but we are going to be in his feet. But before again, I just want to make two brief, brief, brief announcements. One, I am just super excited and I'm certain you are as well. This is the final installment of our sermon series, The Fruit That Remains, and next Sunday, somebody say, next Sunday,

Pastor Philip Anthony, you mentioned we'll be back in the building. just back preaching the word of God. But as we know, the gospel is not tied to one man, but he has been taking this opportunity to just grow and learn and love and be with his wife. He celebrated, I think it was 21 or 22 years of wedding. Bliss on Friday. I was with him yesterday at a Vest Fest in downtown Atlanta,

and you can just see the fire in him. He's ready to get back. So I'm just excited because I'm tired. Lord, I'm just. You got it, Doc. You got it. But secondly, secondly, the thing that I am so, so excited about, how many people have been blessed by 2819 worship? And listen, the Lord has just been breathing on us in such a phenomenal way.

I was on the YouTube page recently. We have 2819 worship on YouTube and you should follow us. We put clips of our worship gatherings on there for people to be a part of. And when we are, I looked on it this last week. I saw that the song for Christ alone had 1.3 million views insane. This song is being streamed literally all over the world of the ability to go in as one of the leaders on the record label side. And I'm able to see where the song is streaming live and it is literally everywhere. Uzbekistan, South Africa, Asia, India, Antarctica.

There are scientists on Antarctica. Greenland and Iceland. Finland. It's all over the world. And so for me, that is just an amazing thing to see. And when we were presented with an opportunity to join a record label, we had quite a few labels approach us. Quite a few. We actually had a deal from a very, very large, prominent, well-known. If I said the name, you would immediately know it, a deal to sign, redlined and everything. But something in our spirit said to just pause, fast, pray. And we live by a philosophy here at this church on our office staff called Zag. When everyone zigs, we zag. We zagged because the Holy Spirit is a zagger.

The Holy Spirit will speak to you randomly and say, don't do that, go this direction. And you've got to listen. That's why it says daily bread. I can't live on yesterday's man. I got to live on today. And so when we felt that and since that, we went into differentiation and signed with the label that we signed to, and they helped us put for Christ alone out in under three weeks. And it was such an exciting moment. But we decided to just take it on back just a little bit. And we're going to drop an EP on the 14th of August. Listen, you can scan the QR code or you can use your phone and tap the device that's right in front of you on the back of your seat. And that is the pre-save link. We've got some amazing songs on there. For example, we have our Spanish

rendition. We have Kristen, one of our leaders singing. We have an acoustic version of it as well led by Jared. And so it is just an amazing, amazing, amazing album. And so when it drops, I want you to play it, you know, all the way home to work, to school. Just play that thing until the wheels fall off, okay? Like, I just, I need you, you know, just, just rock that thing, okay? Because we just believe God is literally changing lives. And I should let you know that we were, we were asked, and we were given the opportunity to be presented into the nomination pool for the Grammys, for the Grammys. We were submitted. Now, I didn't say we was nominated, unless the Lord is so kind, Bless the Lord is so kind.

But, you know, for us, it's not about awards. It's not about accolades. It's not about streams. It's not about that. It's just about us being able to tell the world. For Christ, I live. For Christ, we're willing to die. That we want to stand before the world.

If it's on a red carpet in front of a camera, it makes no difference. To say that Jesus is alive. That no other God can make that claim. That's why, Deuteronomy, I believe it's, I think it's, I think it's, Deeronry 7.9 says, therefore know that the Lord, your God is God. The, not a faithful God. V, which means he is the only one who is faithful and just. It goes on to say his step-fast love to keep his covenant,

which means he's a promise keeper. And so the Lord is kind and good. And so we are just excited about what God is doing. Let's dive into the word upon this morning. afternoon, excuse me, I am an eager anticipation for what God is going to do. Let's pray. Heavenly Father, we just thank you. For you are the king of kings and the Lord of Lords, which means you sit high. Above all of our problems, all of our challenges, all of our situations, we submit this hour to you.

I pray, Father, that you would just clean my hands and purify my heart. I pray that the word would go forth with fire. conviction, truth, and love. Let grace feel the room. Father, I know that there are those in this room with heavy hearts. Grief on their heart as they deal with anniversaries and funerals and upset moments and things that they have lost, be it finances, be it homes, be it relationships, God. But you are still good.

So I pray for a double launching on this word. I pray for the one who walked in here who just said, I want to hear a word, Father God. I pray that they don't walk out asking to be saved. I pray that they walk out saved. I pray, God, that they walk out with a blessed assurance. We love you and we thank you and we honor you for what you are about to do. For it is in your darling son, Jesus name we pray.

Amen. Amen. If I'm going to take a text, we're going to take it from Acts the 12th chapter, Acts the 12th chapter. And we're going to start from the 12th verse. I'm going to read to the 16th verse, 12 verse to the 16th verse. Acts 12 versus 12 through 16. And it reads, when he realized this, he went to the house of Mary, the mother of John, whose other name was Mark, where many were gathered together and were.

were praying. Somebody say praying. And when he knocked at the door of the gateway, a servant girl named Rota came to answer. Recognizing Peter's voice in her joy, she did not open the gate, but ran in and reported that Peter was standing at the gate. And they said to her, you are out of your mind. but she kept insisting that it was so and they kept saying it is his angel but peter continued knocking and when they opened they saw him and were amazed if i could pin a title to this text i would call it this isn't what i asked for this isn't what i asked for um i don't know about you but i

love to eat. Amen. I love to eat. I just, I'm just going to be honest with you. I love to eat. Not from a gluttonous perspective. I just like good food. You know, I guess just what it is. And there is a restaurant, a fast food restaurant that many of you go to. Okay. It's not at you at least. But that was funny. Okay. That was funny. Maybe you go to that you love that is not open on Sundays. All right. I didn't say it. You said it. Now, listen, me personally is personally not one of my favorites. I like the other red place that has chicken strips and they have something called cane sauce. That's mine.

Listen, you like yours? I like mine, right? We both get into heaven, hopefully. All right? So listen, listen, now you got your holy chicken. That's all good. But me personally, I like the other one. Now, when I have to begrudently go to the place that you like, my kids love that place.

but when I go, I have to get the same meal. I get the same meal every single time. I like to get a number one, no pickles, a Coke, light ice, and a chocolate chip cookie. Add bacon. That is, that's the full menu. And every time I go, I do the same thing. I ask them to add those things because you know just as much as I know that that oftentimes when they make that stuff, they just leave it on a little shelf and it'd be like two hours.

And then you order it and they grab them with one and they put in your bag and say, hey, good, nice to meet you. And for me, I want it fresh. I want fresh fries. Fresh fries. Don't give me them dry sandpaper bag for, I want some fresh fries. So every time I go, I order the same thing. I want the number one with pickles with no pickles, bacon, chocolate chip cookie, Coca-Cola, easy ice. Y'all know Coca-Cola is Atlanta water. That's what I call it. I call it Atlanta water. Give me some Atlanta water. Now, last time I went to Chick-fil-A, the place y'all like, the last time I went to this restaurant, I'm trying not to say it. The last time I went to this restaurant, I went in, and as always, I make the same order. I order my number one, no pickles, add bacon, Coca-Cola, easy ice, and a chocolate chip cookie.

They should already know it. I get my order. I go to my car, and I began to unravel the bag, and normally my sandwich is in a white container, a white plastic bag with a little foil on the inside that's recovered over. Yeah, this time it wasn't in that. It was in a box. Now, you know, if you know anything about the box, that's usually like a number three, number four. That's, that's the spicy one.

I don't do the spice. I don't do the spice. I don't do the spice. No, my wife like the spicy. I don't like the spicy one. I like the regular one. No pickles. I have bacon.

Coca-Cola. Easy ice with a chocolate chip cooking. All right. So when I went inside and I asked him, I said, hey, I said, excuse me, my sister in Christ. I'm looking inside. what I see inside my bag, that's not what I ordered. She said, well, what does you order? I ordered a number one with no pickles, add bacon, Coca-Cola, easy ice, and a chocolate chip cookie. She said, oh, that's what's inside of there. Ma'am, I don't think you understand my order. Now, she said,

sir, no, I promise you, it's in there. You know, we were pretty efficient about making sure that we get people exactly what they asked for. I said, no, ma'am, this isn't what I asked for. I asked, now I wasn't elevated my voice. I just, I was being kind, but I asked for the same thing every single time. She said, sir, I promise you, it's in a bag. I said, ma'am, I'm about to give you this back. Because I don't like the spicy. She said, sir, I promise you. What you ordered is on the inside of it. You didn't order the rapper. And see, that stayed with me on my way back to the office

because sometimes we ask God for what is inside and then reject him because we do not recognize the rapper. Yeah, we pray, Lord, change my life and then resist every change that requires something from us. We pray for growth, but growth arrives looking like pressure. We pray for healing. But healing begins with a conversation we keep avoiding. We pray for opportunity, but opportunity keeps come carrying responsibility.

We pray for therapy. Then we go to chat GPT and tell them, what am I? What's wrong with me right now? We ask God to open a door and then stand at the door explaining while we cannot walk through it. So here's what I want to establish before we go on any further. And everything, in my opinion, hangs on this premise. God is rarely delayed in sin. we are often delayed in receiving.

And that means the gap in your life may not be a gap in heaven's willingness, it may be a gap in your reception. Look at Acts chapter 12 makes it even more realistic. The church was praying for Peter. Peter was the answer that they wanted, and Peter actually came. I want you to look at Acts chapter 12, verse 1. It says, about the time Herod the king laid violent hands on some who belonged the church. He called James, the brother of John, with a sword. He killed him. And when he saw it,

it pleased the Jews. He proceeded to arrest Peter also. This was during the days of unleavened bread or Passover. And when they had seized him, they put him in a prison, delivering him of the four squads of soldiers to guard him, intending after the Passover to bring him out to the people. See, the problem was not that God sent the wrong answer. The problem was that their grief had trained them not to believe the right answer could arrive. The answer was exact, but the grief had trained them to call it impossible. They did not say this is not what we asked for. Out of their mouths, they said it with their response.

see Peter was standing at the door and they said it must be an angel they have asked for Peter prayed for Peter fasted for Peter and when Peter showed up they explained him away and the passage here is built around three unique sounds and I want you to hear what those sounds are the sounds of prayer inside the house the sound of Peter's voice outside the gate and the sound of Peter's voice outside the gate and the sound of Peter knocking continuously while the people inside are trying to explain it away. See, this sermon lives in the distance between the prayer inside and the answer outside. The crazy part is that they were close enough to hear, but not yet willing to open the door. See, being near the answer is not the same thing as receiving the answer. Before we get to the

door, we have to understand what the church is carrying. See Acts chapter 12, as you know, it opens up about James, the brother of John dying. Now, James is not just some ordinary biblical individual. James is of the three, Peter James and John. He was the one that was at the Garden of Gensimity. He was the one that was the most closest to Jesus. He was a brother, a friend, a leader, a pastor, an apostle in this church, and he died. And Herod saw that James's death. pleased the people so he arrested Peter too. James was the test but Peter was the repeat. Herod literally built a system around it. Four squads of soldiers, that's 16 and Peter was chained between two of them and two guards at the door. But let's look at verse number five. It says,

so Peter was kept in prison, but earnest prayer for him was made to God by the church. This is important. They were praying with James in the grave and Peter behind bars. They were not praying from a place of easy faith. They were praying after something had already gone wrong. And that matters because some people think faith only counts when it is confident and loud and untouched by questions. This church teaches us that faith can have tears and still. be called faith. A broken-hearted prayer is not a defective prayer. They did not wait until they understood

James before they asked God to save Peter. They prayed for Peter while they were grieving James. Some of us know what it is to pray again after the last answer hurts you. You ask God to keep something and you had to bury it. You asked him to heal something and it got worse. You asked him to open a door and it closed in your face. And now the next time you pray, the old answer is sitting in the room with you. See, pain is an honest historian, but a horrible prophet. I'm going to say that again. That got good to me. Pain is a honest historian, but it is a horrible prophet. See, pain can tell you what happened, but it cannot tell you what God is going to do next. See, the calendar can remind you of what happened in October.

But the calendar can't tell you what God will do this October. See, see, see, when you think about the way that grief works, it literally can leave a something in your heart, a pain in your heart, and you've not even realized it. You can go into your prayer closet, believing that God can. But the pain in your heart will allow you to leave the prayer closet believing that he can, but he won't do it for you. Okay. The last chapter explains your hesitation,

but it does not have the authority over the next chapter of your life. Notice the season. They were praying during Passover. Okay. The feast reminded Israel that God always brings his people out. But Passover was also the season when Jesus was arrested and crucified. So the calendar preached deliverance, but their grief remembered death. And still, they prayed. See, they were braced for another Calvary while heaven had already scheduled in Exodus. Some of us have been preparing for disappointment so long that hope now feels impossible. You call it discernment.

Sometimes it's just pain making a decision God never made. You call it waiting on God, but sometimes you're a value. but sometimes you're avoiding what God already placed in front of you. You call it waiting on God. It's just this obedience with a devotional vocabulary. You're not waiting for God to speak. You are waiting for what he said to become easier. See, you didn't lose your faith.

You made your faith safe enough that it could never hurt you again. So you go into your prayer closet and you ask safe prayers. Simple prayers. Easy prayers. have your way. Whatever you do, Lord, your will, your way. You're abundant. I trust you. But do you really? See, when you lose something, ooh, Jesus, I'm here. I'm ahead of myself. When you lose something that's special, your faith doesn't change, but your trust gets chipped away. I can prove it. I can prove it. I'll give you my own personal story. My grandfather was one of my best friends in life. I'm named after him. His name is Reverend Dr. to Lonnie Dawson, I'm Lonnell Dawson Williams, okay?

I carry that very special to me. I remember when my grandfather got cancer, and his cancer had eaten away at his bones. And I remember going home to California in December and preaching his retirement service in front of the Southern Baptist Convention. And then when I got on a plane to come home, it was December 21st. And I remember getting that call that early morning that my grandfather had passed away. I remember when I had to care for my family because I was the last male in my family on that side. My mother, my sister, my other sister, and my, and my grandmother. Okay. I was one of the last

males on that side of my family. And I remember having to support my, my literally having to support my mom and my grandmother as they grieved, my aunt, as they grieved over this, this man, this myth, this legend, this pastor for the city. And I remember, for some reason, the musician decided to play total praise when we were closing the casket. And it was beautiful. My wife was there. It was beautiful. And they sang amen, amen, amen. And it was beautiful.

And I remember being the one to close the casket as they were singing that song. When I closed the casket, they crescendo with the loudest amen ever. And that was the first time I broke down and cried. I hugged my wife as hard as I've ever hugged him before because I was broken. And every December 21st that comes around. I remember that day. Every time I hear total praise, I don't care where I am. I don't care what's going on.

The minute I hear that song, I can only think of one thing closing that casket. When December 21st hits, I can remember only one thing. The phone call I got that early morning at prayer from my mama saying he's gone. see a calendar can bring something up there are things that can happen in your life that come back every single year i remember what it was like to pray for him that god will heal his body that he still had life to live and i personally remember sitting there at that casket and believing in god and saying god i trust you i thank you i honor you i know that he's in glory but there was a part of me in that moment, while I love her long, it lasted.

I stopped trusting just a little bit. Just being honest, my prayers weren't as strong as they used to be. Because I'm sitting there like, God, I trusted you with this. But this isn't what I asked for. I prayed for healing. You gave it a casket. Some of us are grieving people and some of us are grieving things. We keep asking, God, this.

is not. See, you don't have to stop grieving what God did not explain before you pray for what you still believe he can do. God does not ask you to lie about what hurts you to trust him again. You don't have to stop grieving what God did not to explain before you pray for what you still believe he can do. You do not have to call the grave a blessing. You don't have to pretend the unanswered questions no longer matter because some of us think we have to choose between honesty and faith. That if we admit we're afraid, that we're scared, that we're hurt, that we are somehow not trusting God, that if we admit we're disappointed, we're being disloyal. But biblical faith is not the denial of pain.

Biblical faith is bringing the pain into the presence of God and refusing to let the pain before and become your God. You see, the wound can speak without being allowed to cast the deciding vote. Look at verse number 12. Look at verse number 12. Let's read it. It says, and when he realized this, he went to the house of Mary, the mother of John, whose other name was Mark, where many were gathered together and were praying. Peter is delivered. And when he comes to himself, he goes to Mary's house where many were gathered together. They were praying. I love the nuance. of the text. That's why reading the Bible word for word and line for line is so important

because Peter does not go to a random address. He goes to the house where the church is already praying. See, the answer walked straight into the prayer meeting. Notice the mercy in that. God did not answer in the place where they had never prayed. He brought the answer to the house where their prayers were already sitting. They did not have to travel across the city to find it, the answer came looking for them. We imagine that if God answers, the answer will be dramatic, distant, or difficult, or challenging to recognize. But in this text, the answer is close enough to knock. Look at verse number 13. Come on. Look at the door of the gateway, a servant girl named Rhoda came to answer. She hears the voice. So she recognizes

Peter, she does not see his face, though. She doesn't need to. She knows the voice because she heard it before. See, every one of us knows what the voice of your favorite auntie is compared to the voice of your mother. See, when your mama called your name, you know what that sound like. I don't need to hear or, excuse me, I don't need to see her face to know that that's my mama calling me. Right? And my favorite auntie, what she calls my name, I can hear her voice and I can see the distinction shit without even having to see their names. It's just like, what tone? I'll call my son's name if I say, hey, Dawson.

Or if I say, hey, Dawson. Dawson knows, based on the tone, he ain't got to look at my face. He knows by my voice what I mean. That, my brothers and sisters, let's us know that familiarity gives you discernment. That's why time and the word matters. See, you are learning, excuse me, yes, you are learning the voice of God before the The crisis comes. See, you can't cram for pain at midnight.

Okay, all right, that's fine. The crisis does not create your hearing. The crisis reveals it. See, see, it's too late to cram for the test that starts at nine and starts studying at eight. You can't do that. That's why time had his word daily. Revelation in the text daily.

sitting at his feet daily because you can hear his voice in trying times. But if you only call on him when you need something, you won't hear his voice when he needs something from you. That's another sermon for another time. All right. And here is where the text, I believe, helps us a lot. Some of us are good at announcing what we have not obeyed. Look at the text. Verse number 14, in her joy, she didn't know. the gate. But she ran in and she reported that Peter was standing at the gate. She recognized the answer, but she does not receive the answer. She announces what she has not yet opened. See, you announced the opportunity, but you never applied for it. You celebrated reconciliation,

but you avoided the conversation. Yeah, you shouted about the freedom, but you keep feeding the habit that held you. See, recognition is not reception until your life makes room for what you recognized. So Rhoda runs back into the prayer meeting. Peter is ethydo and the people who have been praying earnestly say you out your mind. Imagine the prayer meeting calls the person carrying the answer crazy. See, don't let their religious language make you slide right past that. They said, it is his angel. So let me put it. that in some context. See, see, see, back in that day, they believed that the angel was simply a reflection of the dead person. They were actually accustomed to seeing or what they felt like

were angels in their presence. What that lets me know is that you can have enough faith to believe in miraculous and still not have enough expectation to believe that it can actually happen to you. Because this is the pattern. This is a pattern. It is not an incident. See, if you go to John chapter 20. Mary Magdalene is outside the tomb. She's crying and Jesus is standing right there in front of her and the Bible says that she's supposed to him to be a gardener. Do you hear that? She came asking about the body and the body is standing in front of her asking her why she's crying and she thought the answer. She's a random person. You go to Luke 24, two disciples walking to Emmaus seven miles and the text says their eyes were kept from recognizing him seven miles they explained

the problem literally to the answer they gave Jesus a full briefing on the death of Jesus the answer look at Thomas unless I see I will not believe all examples now come back to Acts chapter 12 and tell me that the church is a strange place the people closest to Jesus have a documented history of not recognizing him when he shows up. See, that's not a special kind of failure. That is the human condition after loss. See, and it happened to Mary who loved him and the two on the road who walked with him. It happened to Thomas, who was there with one of the 12, and then it happened to you at the prayer meeting, you organized for yourself. Don't just look at the fruit. I want you look at the root. because if we only deal with the behavior, we'll be back in the same seat next year doing the same thing.

Almost all dysfunction is an illegitimate attempt to meet a legitimate need. Hear what I just said? Their need was legitimate. They did not need to be devastated again. That's not weakness. That is not a lack of faith. that is what it means to be a human being who buried somebody days ago. See, God is not offended by that need.

He built it into you. But calling the answer, an angel was an illegitimate way to meet the legitimate need. Because watch what the angel does to him. See, an angel can't leave. A angel can't disappoint you. An angel can't require anything. from you. See, you cannot get your heart broken by something you already decided was dead. So they were not reaching for the angel because they lacked faith. They reached for the angel

because the angel was cheaper than hope. That's the thing I'm not preaching at them. I'm preaching at myself because I have done the same math. I know what it's like to pray for God to do something and he shows up and does it another. way. I know what it's like to pray for an answer and the answer took 19 months to come. And in those 19 months, I had to believe God would, but I felt like he couldn't. Is there anybody that's been in a season where you have prayed and felt like, felt like God forgot about you? Felt like he somehow just skipped right over you. And how is it that he's giving everybody what they need? But then when I ask for what I need, it doesn't show up. Can we be honest? See, God is great enough to hear our

discouragement and hear our frustration and that does not change his love for us. But it should change our reception of him because his will is perfect. His grace and his mercy. What I deserve and what I don't deserve. So that means in my prayer closet, I can be praying fervently, earnestly, stretched out and walk in the need and walk out, feeling like that need will never be met. But here is the beauty and what that does. The enemy cannot take your prayer life. He cannot stop you from gathering with the saints and praying. But see, but if he can get you to reinterpret God's yes as an angel, then he never has to block your answer. He just has to get you to argue with a door that you refuse to open.

So he doesn't fight the prayer. He works at the reception. He lets you pray all night and then hands you a reasonable explanation for why it couldn't possibly be the answer. See, that's not a coincidence. That is a scheme. And I came here to tell somebody you have been arguing with your own answer and calling it discernment. See, there's a difference between believing God can and expecting God did. See, they had the first one.

They were in the meeting. They gathered together. They were praying. What they lost was the second one that he would answer the prayer. See, there's a difference between proximity and possessions. See, they were close enough to hear Peter's voice the answer and still did not have it. Because being near the answer is not the same thing as receiving it. And this is where my title comes back.

See, when I was actually at Chick-fil-A, I never opened the rapper. I decided that whatever the contents of it was based on the wrapper, what was on the inside was supposed to be reflective on the opposite. I looked at the outside. I'd reached a verdict about the inside. I picked up everything in me to go inside and complain, and I never once looked inside the rapper. See, that was my prayer meeting.

They made a ruling on an answer without ever walking to the door. They evaluated the delivery from across the room. Church, you cannot evaluate what God sent from across the room. you have to go to the door. See, we don't always reject the answers. Sometimes we just rename it. We call fear wisdom. We call avoidance peace.

We call disobedience, discernment. And some of us, we don't fear that God will fail us. We fear that God will answer us and require us to become hopeful again. Because if we hope, it means we'll be disappointed. that if we open the door, we might have to trust what we see. See, see, see, see, see, you stay in the prayer meeting and debate the report. You would rather be right about the funeral than wrong about the answer. But Rhoda is insisting.

See, the room was louder than her. The room was older than her. The room had more people inside of it. They had more status. She was just a servant girl. But the room was wrong. The room was loud. and she was right.

There will be moments where anybody and everybody around you has a reasonable explanation for why you should not believe what God has placed in front of you. You will need to know the voice of God for yourself. Faith is not pretending you have no questions. See, faith can be confused and still make moves. You can have questions in your head and obedience in your feet. The problem was not that they were confused. The problem was that their confusion became a reason not to check the door.

See, there's a difference between needing time to understand and deciding that understanding must come from obedience. Look at verse number 16. But Peter continued knocking and when they opened, they saw him and were amazed. Peter continued knocking. Thank God, the knock lasted longer than their unbelief. He kept knocking while they were debating. He kept knocking while they were explaining. He kept knocking while they were calling the answer impossible.

And that, my brothers and sisters, is the testimony. When I hear because we always responded perfectly, we are here because mercy outlasted our denials. See, grief. You don't mind if I call you out. This is a song. My brother Joel. Barnes is here today. Amazing gospel artist, singer.

And he had a song that he sang about his father passing away. The lyrics are absolutely phenomenal. And he preaches, he sings about the grief and the pain that he endured with his father passing. See, grief can do a number on your faith. Grief can turn a prayer warrior until an on again, off again, Christian. See, if you ain't never been hit with something, hard, something that it'll knock you off your feet. And oftentimes we assume it's just a person.

I'm not just talking about a person. I'm talking about a thing, a place, a home, experience, a job, a relationship, peace, drugs, and alcohol, addiction, shame. We can grieve our own mistakes. And then we can go to God. Say, God, I know. I know. need you to do this. And God gives you that. This isn't what I asked for. I said, heal his body. I didn't ask for a funeral. I said, restore that relationship. I didn't know that meant that you were going to make them healthy and whole and they moved on. I said, pull us out of debt. I didn't mean that that I was going to lose the house. I asked for the promotion. I know you're going to lay me off, but your will is better than mine.

The Holy Spirit has just been knocking at my heart. And I'm trying my best not to do this, but I'm going to do it. Please don't put this on social media. Please. When I came here, about a year and some change ago, it was so interesting because I was in a fraternity. It was. And I was like that guy in college. I was that guy.

like quintessential let's just leave it at that quintessential i was that guy uh and when i came to 2819 i remember my very first sunday a young lady uh i was just walking by and she was she was out in the uh in the foyer and she started crying hey i'm new what you're kind of about what church is over why are you and i just i go about my business and i go about my day and she uh she catches me in the parking come on she said londell she said there's something that you're holding on to she said i've been trying my best to be obedient she said but there's something that you're holding on to that if you don't let it die that literally there is a that the next generation she said my son will bear the weight of my sin well wait a second i just got here just started what you got it's my first sunday i'm not brush it off

there's a couple of sundays go by we had an incident that took place here with a young lady and I won't go there. But right after that, a couple people started clipping my name and going on my LinkedIn, and I'm starting to see posts about the organization. And I'm just like, oh, my God, like, y'all got to let this go. Like, this is not what I asked for. Like, I just wanted to just come here and preach and go up by my day. I go outside, and we're at the merch trailer.

These two young ladies came up to me. And it's like, oh, my God. That's exactly what it sound like. Oh, my God, your assignment was so dope. Let me ask you something. Are you still in a fraternity? And I was like, uh, how about that sermon? How was that? All this happened within a couple of weeks.

I think I'd spoken to Gordon about it. Next to you know, I, I pull into the office. And you know, you know, us. I got a back into it. I can't, you know, I can't pull straight in. I got it back in just in case. So I back into the parking spot. And Pastor Philip was walking by.

And he looked at me and he was, you know, when it's odd, I'd say nothing. And the next day, my wife was like, let me talk to you about something i'm like listen all right i get it because i'm i'm super you know i'm super frat you know like don't don't do that because i have you looked into this i'm like listen i i ain't got no heaven and hell put people in like that's not listen what you do is you do what i do as i do and i held on to an idol that i couldn't let go of and i'm sitting there and i'm like this is not what i asked for i just i just wanted to follow your word i left corporate america to come do this thing here 2819 i'm not and then

me and bugging me. I knew what the Lord was saying. I just, no, I'm good. I'm going to just take the rapper. I don't even eat. I don't even eat the sandwich. I'm just eat it just as he is.

And then one early morning, it's in my prayer closet. And I'm so tired. Everybody talking about this. I'm so tired of everybody mentioning it. I'm so tired of people bothering me about this. Who cares? Like, I'm good.

I'm going to heaven. I know I'm saved. It ain't that serious. Like, it's not an idol. It's okay. And Lord said, okay. I said, God, if you want me to give this up, if this is what you want, I'm only going to read one scripture, one only. I'm not even going to, I'm just going to do this. And I'm going to put my hand down

and I'm going to see what you say. Let me tell you something. I'm going to tell you something. Don't ever ask God to do that, okay? Don't. You don't want that. I opened the Bible and I go to Jeremiah chapter 11 it talks about idols and I said oh my god all right all right I get it I get it now watch this before I had the unction inside of me before I had the foreknowledge to do it I went to the door and opened it I didn't wait to hear the voice I didn't wait to assume that I knew what to do. I got up. I went to my closet. Lord don't clip this. And I just grabbed everything. Everything. I grabbed everything. I grabbed jackets. I grabbed my cane. I grabbed everything I had. My scroll. My pearl. I grabbed it off. Now watch this. I put it inside of a bag.

And I don't tell anybody. I didn't tell anybody. I grabbed the bag. I took it to the office quietly. and I slid it in Pastor Phillips' office. I didn't even say nothing to him. I was good. I was like, listen, this is between me and my wife. We're not going to tell anybody the story. It's just, it is what it is. And then one day, we're in the office.

He hadn't come in for a little while, actually. And he came in and, you know, Pastor Philip. He walked in, he stood up bag. He said, who put trash in my office? He didn't even look in. He was like, who put trash in my office? And then he opened it and began to cry. He said, Lionel come here.

I was, ironically, I was in jukle. I came back to the office. I came back to the office. I'm like, what? What did everybody up in here standing for? Because I forgot the bag was in there. I explained to them a story. I said, it's crazy because I kept asking God, I want to go back to ministry.

I want to go back to ministry. I want to go back to ministry. I want to go back to doing what you called me to do. I want to do this work, God. I know the corporate America is not just my place. I know, God, that you've called me into a place of ministry. God, what do you want me to do? And then he asked me to give up something.

And I'm like, this is not what I asked for. I didn't ask for this. No, no, no, I didn't ask for that. No, no, no, I'm good. Paul said, this is exactly what you mean. And that was a year ago. I haven't said a word to anybody about it. The staff knows.

I said, my family is Greek. Listen, I don't have a heaven or hell to put you in. I made the decision. I made the choice. It was my conviction. And I chose that I personally would rather be confident that I did the right thing. then be unsure. Now, what does any of this have to do with the message?

It is exactly. See, had I not made that decision, I don't believe that God would trust me to be on this platform. Sometimes God allows grief to happen to test if you'll trust him in that season so that he can give you what you need in the next. Can you handle this and still love me in spite of? so that when the next season comes and that starts to look like this, you'll say, for God, I live. I trust you no matter what.

In good days and in bad days, I will still give you praise. I don't care what I've gone through. I don't care what I've experienced. This isn't what I asked for, but God, this is what I needed. Your grace and your mercy is sufficient. It lives and lasts. all generations that you will put me by green pastors and steel waters. It will restore my soul.

Grief and pain, disappointment, shame, and guilt does not have to have a hold on you. May you pray fervently, earnestly. That's Lisa. Even with tears coming down your eyes. Pray when it doesn't make sense. pray when you feel like nobody loves you pray when you feel like they've forgotten about you pray like it is all on god and not on you pray watch this and believe that the answer is at the door this is not what i ask for this is exactly what you need i'm gonna say this and then i'm gonna get out

your way it's so interesting how the gospel is all connected jesus is found everywhere and all of it Peter's knocking at the door. The Bible says that Jesus is knocking on the door of your heart. Peter is in prison. Jesus is in a grave and he is set free. Peter in verse number 17 and 18 gives a message to James, the brother of Jesus, literally gives a message to the next apostle and says, keep fighting the good fight of faith.

and Jesus has come so that you and I can have keys to the kingdom. We are a living example of what happens when somebody answers the door. And today, God is giving you the opportunity to answer the door of Him, nothing on your heart. He says, when you hear my voice harden not your heart. that means do not give the enemy an opportunity to convince you that what you're feeling is not real that is an attack of the enemy that you have been set up by the Holy Spirit to walk in here and to hear a sermon about pain and grief and your life this isn't what I asked for God's like this is exactly what you need see you needed to hear that pain is real

and that God can love you through your pain and your grief. See, you need to hear that he is a good, good father. You need to hear that in spite of what your mother and your father, they might have forsaking you, but he can't. You needed to hear that your shame and your guilt does not block you from the love of God. You need to hear that the mistakes that you've made in your past do not keep you from His holy love and grace. You need to hear that you might have come out of the club just a few hours ago

And you brought, you came in here with your friend, but he's ready to set you free. So if I'm talking to you, you're saying, you've been, you've been preaching up and down my street this whole time. All up in my business. That's not me. That's the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit knew exactly what he was doing when he brought you in here. To give you an opportunity to accept Christ as your Lord and Savior. Do not walk out of this room, assuming that you have another shot.

You do not. You do not know when your last. day is coming. Death is guaranteed for all of us. Time is running out. I could literally get on a plane tomorrow and die. It is a very strong possibility. But if I do, I've got the blessed assurance that I'll close my eyes on earth and I'll open them in heaven. And some of you need that blessed assurance. Some of you need the confidence, the confidence to know that our loving saviour loves you. He died on the cross for your sins. He was buried in a borrowed tomb. And for three days, he stayed there and on the third day he got up watch this with all power power means that he can

pull you for you from darkness west into his marvelous light so if i'm talking to you you since god is saying i i he said i need you i know the life that you had it's not what you asked for but he's trying to give you a new one today if i'm talking to you i know you in the room i just want you to put your hands up very quickly do not be embarrassed do not be ashamed no one there we go put him up high God bless you. Hallelujah. God bless you. I see you.

God bless you. I see you. God bless you. I see you in the back. I see you over there. God bless you. You can put your hands down. Listen.

I'm going to tell you something. It is an attack of the enemy for you to assume. The attack of the enemy will get you to assume that in the morning when you wake up and you pray that the feelings that you have today were fake. Don't allow the enemy to do that. High and exuberant and excited. I don't know. But what I can promise you is the decision that you made today is real. What I can promise you is that if you just keep coming back,

if you plug in, you serve, you love, you be a part of community, you're on a squad, you build community with folks around you around you right now, and you let them know that I want to keep coming back. Will your life be perfect? No. But will it be better? That is what is Christian walk is about. Last but not this.

And then, I'm going to get out your way. I promise. This is the last day. I feel this. inclination. At 2018, I just want to let you know we don't do membership. We don't do membership. The reason why we don't do membership is God called us to make disciples.

He didn't call us to make members. Right? So there's no membership roster. You know, listen, just keep coming back on you. That's my member. That's not. You're an individual. You come here and you see the gospel, you go.

And if one day God calls you to another place to another church, by all means, as long as you're in a place of healthy, gospel-centric word, that's all that matters to us. I just believe there are people in this room that want to call this place home. You've been sneaking up in these rooms for the last couple of months. And Pastor Philippe ain't been here. I see your face. And you feel like, man, I want to call this place home.

I want to get locked in. I want to serve. I want to find a community. This feels like home to me. It feels like the place that I want to be planted. I want you know this is a good place. As they used to say back in the day, good ground, good soil. fertile soil where you can be planted and for sake.

So very quickly, if I'm talking to you, say, I can be online digitally and this is my home. Or if I'm in the room, and I believe this is my home, I just want you to raise your head up. 2819, can we celebrate these people, our brothers and sisters in Christ? Welcome to the family. Everyone that raised their hand, be it to accept Christ or to be a part of this community, there's a tent. As soon as you go out of the gray door, there's a tent there that says connect corner. I want you to go there. They're going to give you a basket. And in that, excuse, they're going to give you a bag. And inside of that bag, you're going to find a Bible. You're going to find information. There'll be to answer questions that you may have about this ministry, about the decision that you made, pray with you, love on you, get you connected and be a part of what God is doing here at 2819. I want you to be faithful in your giving. Be faithful in your giving because what God is doing here at this church and in this seat. amazing. I got a meeting tomorrow and trust me, God is going to do something special.

Be here next Sunday when Pastor Philip comes back. There's an announcement that I believe God is about to blow our minds. Listen, if you've been blessed by the word, put your hands together as our fishing castles come.