40ish - 40ish Live: Menopause, Relationships & Midlife Madness in London (Part 2)

Episode Date: July 30, 2026

Part two of our first ever live show — recorded in front of a sold-out crowd at Kings Cross, London in July 2026. The chaos continues with more stories, more laughs, and even more of the honest, hilarious conversations that make 40ish what it is. This time it's midlife madness, menopause moments, relationship dramas, and all the ridiculous things we experience but rarely say out loud — with a room full of women who completely get it, and the energy to match. Settle in for another slice of 40ish live: laughter, honesty, and the comforting reminder that whatever weird thing you're going through, you're almost certainly not the only one. Thank you to everyone who joined us in person — we loved having you. 🎧 Missed Part 1? Catch it now. New episodes every week from Self Care Club / 40ish. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

My name is Peter Parker, but I'm also Spider-Man. This Thursday, we're faced with a threat. That can be anyone. The world may have forgotten Peter Parker. I'm just a neighbor, friendly neighbor. But he hasn't forgotten them. Sometimes Spider-Man has to do the hard thing. That's my responsibility.

Talk to Banner? I didn't know you could get that big. Spider-Man, brand-new day in theaters Thursday. It's not good. She isn't allowed to touch any tech. We let her on Facebook, but that is about it. That's because Facebook's for old people. Yeah, yeah.

So we emailed out a Google Doc. Hands up if you've got the Google Doc, because I don't check email, so I would never have seen that Google Doc. They got it, they got it. They got it. They replied, so they must have got it. That would be a no, then. And we asked you all a few middle-aged questions.

And we just wanted to get the, vibe in the room and now we're going to talk about it. We're going to go through all of your, not all of them, because we're not at school. And I promise it will be more fun than it sounds. Let's just get into it. But we're also going to share ours, right? Okay, so we're starting with most 40-ish recent purchase. I will go first.

It's deeply middle-aged. It's six pairs of Fliptronic Pilates socks. Purchase for Amazon, 799. Rainbow colours of pride I got mine's much more middle aged I'm really sorry Richard

and the other gentleman I don't know your name Hogarth Is it Hogarth? Yeah I'm really sorry but you have come here So here we go I bought some resistance bands Recommended by my Ladies Physio I now have a

Woman's Physio, that's not fun to help with my pelvic floor Yep that's where I am in life Post-histerectomy, now I have to worry about... Can I just ask on that, does anybody else here worry about their pelvic floor? No, I need more hands up. I need... Thank you, thank you.

And let me tell you something, for all the people whose hands are not up, start worrying about it. Because I'm telling you, when you don't worry about it, you'll know why you should. I love that you've shared that, but you haven't shared the other thing on your most 40-year's...

Why can't say that today? Your recent purchase, which is that you are going to treat yourself to a new washing line. I am. I am. When we first started this show, I spoke about this washing line that I bought that Lauren like literally got a hold on for. It's on wheels.

It's on wheels. She can wheel it. Yeah, and it's collapsible. And it was just a piece of plastic shit from Amazon. And I'm not joking, every time it comes out the laundry room with it, it's like a really hot day. Lauren's eyes just a lot. I love it.

She's like, I'm going to treat myself to new. And I was like, I'll have your old one. I'll have your old one. She's like, it's being held together by Alan Keyes. You're not having it. It's a pizza jake. Just buy your own. Also, we had so many emails in about the washing line.

Can you share the link to the washing line? I can't even tell you the DMs and the emails. I had to send this link. I should have done an affiliate link. I would have been a millionaire. Anyway, so you guys have said, we've got some crackers here. This is from you guys. Gardening gloves.

Gardening gloves. Standard. Standard. Everyone has a pair of those. Ultraviolet mattress hoover. There's a hand up. Now good because I have a lot of questions about this.

Stand up, please. Oh, hi. Oh, Eliza. What is it? What is it? What is it, please? Not anymore. So I'm just talking about what you shed when you sleep.

Oh, sounds sexy. So it hovers up all the dead skin and whatever else you might find in your mattress but it zaps anything in the mattress at the same time with ultraviolet light. Zapping like dust mic. Like you know when you get your nails done and it goes blue in the thing.

Yeah. Yeah. It zaps it with UV. How did you even know about this thing? She knows about shit like this. I deep dive. When there's an issue, I deep dive. When there's an issue. Thank you very much for having me.

Okay. Okay. Sandals with Velcro straps. I mean that is. Who's got sandals with Velcro straps? Stand up please. needs and talk about these. Oh, look at her backtracking now.

Can't it, right? No, but hold on. I want to know about these. What? I'm going to ask. There are some sandals that are like hiking sandals. Are they teather? Right, describe please.

Are you wearing them? Can you hold one up, please? Because I need to know whether to be judgy about this or not. She can't see through the lies, but I'm telling you she'll be judgy about it anyway. Are they comfortable? Is it about ankle support? Okay. It's definitely a 40-ish. I mean, her eyes...

She doesn't know whether to judge them or ask you for the link. She really doesn't know which way to go about this. This was brilliant. Not so much a purchase, but I booked my oven cleaner to clean the oven. Grill and extractor next Tuesday. It's long overdue. I'm going to buy some new oven trays to celebrate.

Amazing. Now, where are the oven? oven trays coming from? And what kind? I'd like to know. Are you here, oven person? They're not here? No. God, I'm never going to know the answer to that.

It's okay. You'll be all right. I won't. Hold me in knickers. Standard. Standard 40-ish purchase. My friend purchased what was a desktop air cooler from TikTok shop that is smaller than a pencil sharpener.

Sounds really effective. This is my personal favourite. And I'm sorry, I'm already judging. I don't care who you are. sketchers sandals with the hands-free slip-in feature, I daren't tell my sister, who is very fashion-forward, or she will disown me. Can I just say she should disown you?

Oh, you're here! Right. You know this podcast called 40-ish, not 80-ish, yeah? You are not. People in glass houses, Lauren. No, no, edit. Yes, yes, we're ready. What do you want to ask?

What do you want to ask? Explain yourself. Well, I've always been 40-ish since I was maybe 10. Okay. So I'm not. I actually quite love that and I resonate. You're meeting your people. So showing my sister would, it's already happened and it's already been bad.

So I'm just feeling like the sketches with the slip on is maybe a step. Was it anything to do with Jamie Rednatt? I don't know. Oh, did it? Was he an ambassador? Yeah. He's an ambassador. Now I bought them because my husband and I, when we go on holiday, we like to walk and hike and do all that nice stuff.

But I wanted a pair of sandals that looked somewhat elegant. Yeah. And I'd probably worn them twice. Okay. But I tried. Okay. It's more that the hands-free thing. I know.

Yeah. That influence the choice. Oh, okay. That is the important point. I'm glad you made it. But my sister wouldn't believe me. So that's why. No.

She wouldn't. Many wouldn't. No. Okay. We're going to move on to prizes now unless anyone has got a very quick purchase they want to share with us. Okay, so it's between gardening gloves, ultraviolet mattress hoover, sandals with elk crow straps, the oven cleaner, hold me in knickers, and the desktop caller from TikTok shop, and the sketcher sandals.

What do we think? Hoover, Hoover, unanimous, unanimous. Eliza, come and get your gift. Come and get your gift. Can you make your way up, or we might have to bring it to you. Yeah, that is true. But that doesn't go well with the show. Okay, we're going to move on.

me, you won't be that thrilled. Okay, shall I choose something for her? Oh, this is amazing. This is, no, no, this is brand, this is merch. You can model it if you like. It's a 40-ish apron. Yeah, you see. Yeah, but it's more like something you would wear

at like the pottery cafe. Or if you're doing messy play with your kids. Oh, stunning. Love it. Love it. Thank you to our model. Okay, we are moving on to someone I shouldn't fancy, but I do.

Okay, and we got some great responses. Go on, who are yours? Lawrence is really weird. Okay, mine coming categories, right? I have like different categories. You'll understand when I tell you. Okay, first category is Jamie Oliver and Will Young, but like in his younger days.

And the thing is, it's not that I actually find either of them attractive, but there's something about the Lisp and the big tongue. and it's not, she keeps saying that. I mean, really. No, it's not that, it's not. It is that. It's not. It's just very subconscious. It's something to do with the list.

It does something to me. It's not, it's the tongue. I don't know what it is, but that's the first category. Second category is a bit like what I call dog on a row, dog on a string. It's Pete Wicks and Justin Bieber. It's something to do with like they need a wash and they've got neck tattoos. Okay, that. Then Stanley Tucci because...

Oh, unanimous. I mean, it's clear you do not have a type. And then these are like my true loves of all time forever, amen. Ferris Bueller, but not Matthew Brederick, Ferris actual Bueller, and Harrison Ford. But even Ferris Bueller's old now. Yeah, but when he was Ferris Bueller. And also Harrison Ford, the most handsome man of all time ever.

But have you seen him in shrinking? Because he's really decrepit. Bless him. I mean, he's amazing that he's really old. Still hot. 80s, he still got it. It doesn't matter how big his tongue is, I'm telling you. That might be any more interesting.

Anyway, those are mine. Those are mine. I didn't have anyone particularly interesting that I fancy. Apart from John Hamm, but who doesn't fancy John Hamm? Even one middle-aged woman that doesn't fancy John Hamm. Even the blind. There's a hand that's not possible. No, really?

It's not possible. Look again. It's not possible. Yeah, try harder. So there's been a few. So we've had Shane Richie. This is from you guys. Oh, what is that? A yay or an A?

No. Hands up for yes. Shane Ritchie? Hands up for no. Okay. He's a bit doggone a rope. I don't know. My new breast surgeon, tall Irish man who wants to make my boobs look pretty again.

Get that. Here for it. Jonathan Bailey, but who doesn't fancy Jonathan Bailey? Everyone fancies Jonathan. No, there's a shaky head. Jonathan Bailey, you'd have to be blind not to fancy him. The guy in off-campus got a lot of traction. Anyone watch Off-campus?

Yeah, yeah. Watch it. Lorenzo from Love Island. Oh, okay. Tom Hanks? No. Because I wanted to know Tom Hanks' toy story. Tom Hanks, Big. Tom Hanks' Toy Story.

Tom Hatt. Woody. Tom Hanks, Forrest Gump. Which Tom Hanks? And also, like, oh my God, I've completely forgotten when he does the running. What's he called? Forest Gump, that's what I said.

Forest Gump. Or the one where he's on the castaway. Castaway. Yeah. That would be. Or like when Harry met Satt, did you say that too? No, he's not in when Harry met Sally. That's Billy Crystal.

Oh no, you're right. Yeah. Okay, let's move operant on hands. A guy I was dating but he doesn't want anything serious. I'm 50-ish, so no. Okay. Someone's put here, Nicole Goodman. Okay, Lauren, like, lived for that moment.

Lived for it. I think I know who it was, but I'm not saying, Richard. I'm not saying anything. Richard. He's not, we've not heard the end of that. You'll never hear the end of that. Okay, so let's vote.

Shane Richie, the breast surgeon, Jonathan Bailey, the guy in off campus, Lorenzo, Tom Hanks, Jonathan Bailey. But it's someone you're not supposed to passy. Yeah, that's the thing, is someone who you're not so... The guy from off campus.

Yeah, I mean, Garrett Graham, come on. Who is cute? Who said the guy from off campus? He is so cute. Hands up if you said a guy from home from campus. Yeah, come up. get your prize. I think he is so cute. Okay, round of applause.

I'm going to choose your prize. It's nothing exciting. It's reading glasses. Yeah. Excuse me, it's two pairs of reading glasses. None of the prizes are good. That's the whole point of the game. They're just middle-aged and shit. Bit like menopause. I thought you were going to say a bit like us and I was going to get really upset.

Okay, we're going to move on to our meltdown. So in the second half of our show on the podcast, always talk about our midlife meltdowns. It's basically just the point where we moan a lot. And it's usually the funniest segment of the show. Well, I say that. I think it is. Round of applause if you think it is.

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Peace contact connects Ontario at 1-866-531-2,600 to speak to an advisor, free of charge. BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. Okay, we're going to move on to our meltdowns. So in the second half of our show on the podcast, we always talk about our mid-life meltdowns. It's basically just the point where we moan a lot. And it's usually the funniest segment of the show. Well, I say that. I think it is.

Round of applause if you think it is. Just join in with me here. My meltdown this week is actually it's more a meltdown about myself. I have a lot of meltdowns about my husband. He did ask if he could come to the show. I said, absolutely not. And then he said, are you going to talk about me? And I was like, yes.

But it's fine. The other day, and it was just before I had been to the gynecologist to get my HRT changed for reference. And that is an important point. He was drinking his protein shake next to me. We were both on our laptops. And I cannot even begin to express how. loud. He was swallowing. He was swallowing. And I just looked at him and I said, he's like,

what, what? He's basically terrified at this point. And he's like, what, what? And I'm like, why? Have you got to swallow so loudly? And he just sort of, he had the protein shake in his mouth and he was sort of like, it was just like, and he's, and he like swallowed it very slowly. And my meltdown is not actually about him swallowing because I think that would be unfair. and unreasonable. It's more that me that I find swallowing annoying. And then I said to you

because Ollie sometimes says... And that's not a sentence I ever thought I'd say by the way. Sometimes I get told off when I'm drinking tea by Ollie because he says, oh God, you swallow so loudly. You actually do. You actually do swallow.

Well, last week it was way too loud. Really? Yeah, you swallow very, very loudly because you don't drink lot. So when you drink, it's like... Very, very thirsty. It's like this dramatic moment of hydration in Lauren's world. And like you have to hear the whole thing.

It's like you hear it gurgling all around. It's horrible, actually. That's horrible. We might need marriage therapy. Anyway, my meltdown. My meltdown is that I find certain very unreasonable things utterly unpalatable. Hands up for anyone else that can relate to that. Thank you.

Thank you. And I just, I can't bear it. Like, what am I supposed to do with that? It has a name. It's called like misophonia or something, yeah. And when you can't, I did go through a stage, I will say before HRT, when in the evenings, Ollie would eat yogurt in the living room and the sound of the spoon and the yogurt and the bowl was so bad I had to put cushions

over both of my ears. Because I couldn't tolerate the yogurt. You're eating yogurt. I couldn't tolerate. I can't even tell you. It gave me like rage, rage. But then I started on the HRT and now he can just freely eat yogurt.

He just can freely go to the kitchen, spoon yogurt. And you know what? It doesn't bother me. I'm fine with it now. When he was sat there with the mouth full of protein shake like this and looking like a deer in the headlights not knowing what to do, and I said to him, I know it's unreasonable.

I am aware. There is awareness there, but I can't turn the rage off. So if you're going to swallow, you're going to have to go elsewhere. Like, this is not acceptable. He said to me yesterday, has she been like really ugly with you? I said, sorry, do you think, I was like, are you new here? Do you think this is a you problem? Like, obviously, he's like, so I shouldn't take it personally.

I'm like, no, don't take it personally. You're like, it hasn't bypassed me and it was like, hello, I'm actually in the room. Then we just carried on talking about her like she wasn't there. So that's my meltdown. Swallowing. Okay. I think that's fair enough. And valid.

What a great... As is mine. What a great soundbite. That's my meltdown swallowing. Might put that at the beginning of the show. Put it there. Mine is as follows Vinted. Vinted.

Does anyone here use Vinted? You buy and you sell and it's such fun. Wow, what a buzz of adrenaline when you get three pounds for some shitty track suit bottoms. Anyway, I feel like as I head into middle age, my tolerance for Vinted is diminishing. I feel like if I was 25 selling on Vinted, cool, great. But now I'm finding it quite grating. And this week's sale tipped me over the edge. I know this is very triggering for Nicole because Nicole is locked out of Vinted.

So if I ever talk to her about Vintage, she's like, Don't talk about Vindid, I'm locked. So. It's true. I even set up another Vinted account, but I feel so fucked off with the first Vinted account. There's £30 in her locked Vinted account. She cannot access.

She can't get it. There's no one to phone, Vinted, no one. No one to phone. No one to email. There's no help desk. There's no, nothing. And then they say, oh, we can help you. Just log into your Vinted account.

I'm like, that's why I need help. So trigger warning, this is about Vinted. Okay. So I put on Vintedit, I wanted to bring it for you today, but I had to bring the whole set, so I wasn't bringing it. This is the title of it. Zara tunic dress, size M, eight pounds. Description, pale blue, thin cotton with red embroidery can be worn as a mini dress

or long-line tunic pulls over the head, has a tie at neck. Tuesday morning, I get a message. Hi, is this big for a size medium? Yes. Wednesday. Will it fit me? I am a size 12. I've written this down verbatim.

Yes, definitely, I say. It would fit from a size 8 to 14. There are no zips or buttons. You just pull it over your head. Thursday. Will you accept five pounds? Yes. Friday.

Would you be able to tell me the measurements pit to pit to pit? 43. I am a woman in perimenopause with three children, a dog, a jaw, and a life. I do not have the bandwidth to locate a tape measure, measure the top, and then message the details to you. It is a fiver, take a punt.

Is it baggy? She did not buy it. It is still for sale. That is so funny. You should have brought it tonight. I did mean to. But I mean, that's my time with Vinted. Absolutely brilliant. Thank you. You're welcome. I thoroughly enjoyed that. Okay, onto your meltdowns.

Oh, these are so special. This was going to be my favourite bit of everything was waiting for these. Why oh why does my husband put his clothes on the wash basket rather than in it? Yeah. I actually think I prefer to pick them up off the floor of the bedroom.

Is this weaponised incompetence? Richard? Richard. Hogarth? Hogarth, is this weaponised incompetence? Yes, yes, yes. Thank you for the self-awareness, Hogarth. We appreciate it.

my husband not squeezing out the kitchen sponge. Kitchen sponge. This is like the swallowing. It drives me mental. I so agree with that. But also because like the sponge could go like really manky. Do you know what I mean? That's what I prefer an ecloth.

Huh? It does. Speak up. Speak up. Okay. Cite it in the divorce. Does not squeeze out sponge. This is why I use ecloths, Nicole.

and not a sponge because they're easier to squeeze out. I don't care. I really don't care. I want the advertisements about how to fix myself as I get older to stop. I want to age with dignity and class and without all the gadgets and gauze and lotions I decide I want it not the great capitalism machine.

Oh, a round of applause for that. I like that. That's quite highbrow. Also, confused about the gauze. Yeah, what are you using? gauze for? What's gauze for? Are you a nurse in World War I? What used you have for gauze? Are we going to get any clarity on the gauze?

Because I asked Lauren this yesterday and you were all for it. You were like, bandages, bandages. I'm like, well, what's she bandaging? I don't know what she's bandaging as she gets older. Maybe she's had her facelift and she needs bandages. I don't know. It's a bit of a weird one, right? No, we're not going to get clarity on the gauze. That's okay. We'll just come to our own conclusions. I am only just 46. Last week I went to a friend's 60th birthday party, a baby mum friend. So realization really hit that she was my age when she gave birth. We have nearly 15-year-olds.

I could not start again now. And anyway, I'm on HRT. I'm not getting pregnant. Then I, this is a real rant. Then I go for my HRT review for some prescription tweaks. After using it for three years, it has really given me, me back. I'm recommended to change to continuous progesterone, at which point I asked,

thought it has to be cyclic if you're still having periods, only to be told you may only be having periods because you're on HRT. What the fuck? I could, could I have entered menopause without being aware this shocks me to my core? Is there anything about menopause that hasn't shocked you to your core? Because to be honest, for me, it has been one big, fat fucking shock after another and the minute the shocks are over, guess what? Then I have another shock. Like, oh, I thought I felt okay now. No, no, it turns out that was just a phase. Yeah. And then everyone's like, now that you've had your

hysterectomy, oh you'll be fine now. Oh, you'll be fine now. No, no, no. I have not settled. Not settled. Yes. I'm definitely not settled. No, not yet. So the whole thing is just shocking endlessly. Endlessly shocking. Do you want the prize? That was my mouth. Well, the swallowing

is a whole thing. Do you want the prize? Well, I know what the prize is, so no. Who are we giving the prize to? My husband not squeezing out the kitchen. Sponge. Why or why does my husband put clothes on the basket rather than in it? Very valid. The progesterone.

The advertisement. It's the advertisements about the gauze. But are they here? Are you here? I don't think they're here. No, they're not here. They can't win if they're not. Sponge.

Spong. Come on, Sponge Lady. Oh, I've got just the prize for Sponge Lady. She'll love it. Oh, that's amazing. It's six ecloths, if you didn't hear. And a bottle of method anti-back. Lovely. Catherine. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. That was great. We love the meltdowns. I love the meltdowns so much. I just want to take a moment to say thank you so much for being part of our show and always emailing your stuff in and being with us and giving us the dilemmas and giving us the meltdowns and giving us the feedback because it really, does build the show

into what it is, doesn't it? So without you guys, honestly, we wouldn't be able to do what we do and we love doing what we do. It's such a stupid job but we have so much fun doing it. So thank you to you guys. Okay, we asked you, do you have any burning questions for us? But there is one that we

had that hasn't been written down. What is it? And I knew it was one of your friends because she basically asked us. Oh yes. Have we ever had a sex dream about one another's husband? The answer's no No

And then I got really worried When I saw the question That because I'd read the question Then it would happen Because it was like in my subconscious Yeah But no Adam stays safely clothed

At all times In my mind And in real life He does come down to the kitchen In his pants sometimes But that's about it A lot He does that a lot

The answer is also no from me So I hope that clarifies Your question, weirdo Who asks that? Thank God Thank God this is a great one Louise asked are you best friends well I mean I only like like four people

and you are in one of them so yeah but the thing is is that this came up Lauren is what you don't know well you might know about Lauren is she is the least fluffy person you will ever meet in your entire life there's no hugs there's no frills there's no even when we're doing a live show for the first time ever there's no you look nice there's nothing she literally said to me how do I look I look nice she's like you could say it once in a while. Like, oh my god, this is the most dysfunctional, functional marriage now.

Literally nothing. Nothing, not word. No. So there's no fluff. So when this came in, and I thought that was really funny, and also I like to make Lauren feel really uncomfortable because I am fluffier. I'm not that fluffy, but I am better than Lauren. So I said, oh, Louisa's asked him with best friends and she went, eh, and just like, lovely, how nice. So come on, let's air it. Let's air it. Let's do it, let's do it. Go on. You go. Because people always assume we are the best of friends. We do speak about 87,000 times a day and then when I'm in the car with any of my children,

they're like, why are you always on the phones and a car? Whenever I get in the car. Always. That's nice. That's nice. We, well, we've only been friends for six years, as we said earlier. Nearly seven, it's nearly our anniversary. What are you buying me? Seven years is wool. I checked.

Wool. You've already checked. You're already ahead of it. Nicked me something. That would, you you would knit me something. I'm a terrible knitter. Dreadful. I'm not going to knit you something. I'm probably not going to buy you anything.

Actually, is our anniversary coming up? We met in August because you were moaning about the packing. That is right. Say I'm not romantic, but I remember these things. You don't. It's all coming full circle now. So, yeah, we are very close friends. We are.

We're not just work partners. We couldn't do the job that we do if we didn't actually really enjoy and like each other. And sometimes... I'm checking if I'm agreeing with this. Yeah. I have to check. with you because I never fucking know, do I? No, stealth, I'm stealth.

Listen, some of your friends are in the audience and I'm telling you they're having an internal nod as I say it. Yes, I can see one of them nodding, Kate is nodding, yes. You never really know. But Kate will always say that if you get a nice thing out of me, like you know it's real. Like, you know what I mean?

I'm never going to pay it lip service. If I say it's nice, it's really fucking nice, because I'm not just going to say it. So when Lauren likes your hair, it goes something like this. Oh, you've had your haircut. That's a compliment, by the way. Yeah, it is.

Yeah, that's how it goes. So thank you for that question, Louise. Yes, we are very good friends. Again, we have to get along to do what we do and to have the fun that we have on the podcast. Andrea, again, Andrea is busy knickers today. If I visit London from Canada, can we meet for coffee? Yes, Andrea, coffee, cocktails, dinner, brunch, whatever you like.

If you come all work in Canada, we will meet you. This show is actually going out on our podcast. It will be out in a couple of weeks on video and audio as well. So hopefully Andrea will hear this. If you could give one piece of advice to the 30-year-old you, what would it be? I think that's such a great question. And actually, I would like to ask you guys this as well. I would like to throw this out to you guys.

Go on. What would yours be? I actually had like quite a nervous breakdown when I turned 30 because I felt like everything was done. Like I'd done everything. I'd like had my kids. I mean, I hadn't had the last one, but I didn't know he was. coming, but I felt like everything was done. So, like, 30 was much harder than 40.

You have a nervous breakdown over every birthday. Yeah, that's true, but 30 was, like, harder than 40. 40 was okay, but 30 was, like, I think I've completed everything. But that was a little naive, because I hadn't completed anything. So what would you tell your 30-year-old self? It is not over. Yeah. Brilliant.

Lovely. Light and very positive. I think I would tell my 30-year-old self, basically it's whatever you're thinking it's the menopause so like go sort your hormones out literally because they absolutely took me for a total ride that's what I would say has anyone else got any advice in the audience

about what they would tell their 30 year old selves no silence it's a good question it is a good question what about the woman that asked oh yes oh yes a round of applause for that stop giving a shit about what other people think but you do give a lot of shets till you're 40 Pip, you'll get this now, you'll just stop caring.

The thing is, though, is that last week when I really didn't give a shit, what other people thought, it turned out that I was very socially unacceptable. And it got to the point where Lauren basically told me not to leave the house. So there is a fine line, isn't there, of not giving a shit and just basically just sometimes just zipping it up. It's how you end up living in a farmhouse with 25 dogs and no friends. And I'm not saying that I'm adverse to that. idea because it does sound fun sometimes but I think that's how it happens you know

Kim says what surprised you most about being in your 40s I don't know nothing mine's easy the menopals literally all roads lead back to the menopause come on did it surprise me yes it did surprise you yes it did surprise you okay it surprised me it did surprise you you were in denial for about a year and then when Niles is a very nice place to live though not me and then when you realize that when you realize that you were actually in the menabors, you were quite surprised. I think it's when you and my husband had a conversation

about me at the David Lloyd. Why do you keep saying David Lloyd? That's how you have to pronounce it. I think it's when you had a meeting about me. We didn't have a meeting. I saw him, he was there, we sat and had a coffee, he said she's not okay. I said, I know. That is a meeting.

It wasn't pre-plan. Anyway, after that, you went to the doctor, so go me and Ollie. Does anybody else have any questions for us? They've asked them all. Yes. Upday on Jeff. I do have an update on Jeff. Give context on who Jeff is.

Jeff is a golden retriever that I fostered. When I say fostered, he was sort of foisted upon me literally on a Tuesday morning and then I had to go to the studio an hour later. But anyway, he was a lovely dog. He was a rescue from Egypt and him and my dog Bieber had a fabulous time. Anyway, yes, Jeff was adopted. Did you know that? Yes, he was adopted out by a lovely family.

And then I just got a bad hebi-jee-jee-be-feeling. I don't know why. And I texted the adopted dad, and I was like, hi, how was it going with Jeff? And he said, unfortunately, we can't keep Jeff. The fourth failed adoption. So I don't know what it is for this guy. He cannot catch a break.

I am not having him back. I'm sorry, I'm not. But, yeah, they are keeping him until he finds, hopefully, his final forever home, but poor Jeff. Yeah, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I can't give you a happily ever after on Jeff. He's fine, he's living in Essex in a mock Tudor mansion, but not permanently. Poor Jeff. Jeff will be okay.

Listen, it's better than being a street dog in Cairo, okay? He's all right. Anushka said, just a big thank you for the podcast and for making me feel seen, heard, not alone, and that I found my tribe and for bringing us together today. Anushka. Thank you, Anushka. Thank you, Anishka. That's so sweet. We basically started 40-ish just for our own amusement

just because we like making each other laugh and talking shit to each other all day so we thought we might as well record it because we're saying it anyway. But what we ended up talking about was just everything, just everything, like the messy and brilliant and confusing experience of realizing

that you're getting older and actually you don't have all of the answers, but you get a little bit more comfortable with the questions, right? Yeah. And that really has been the beating heart of 40-ish. And when we started it, we didn't really know how it was going to grow and what it was going to turn into. But now, I think it just acknowledges that we can all be so many things all at once.

I mean, I definitely can in any five minutes. Hormonal, emotional, happy, sad, rageful, exhausted, overwhelmed, content, fed up. fulfilled and everything else in between. We get to be all of it. And we have to keep reminding one another that all of it is perfectly normal. And all of it is just part of being a middle-aged woman and we are sold so much misinformation.

So that is why we think that our podcast and places like this and this space is so important that we can keep giving each other the correct information and the correct support that we all really need. And we try and deliver all of that with fun and with a bit of humor, but we know that this stage of life has challenges because we're dealing with it too, and we hear that from the audience every single day. We get DMs and emails and messages,

and everyone very generously shares their stories and their struggles, and we hope that we do them justice by bringing them to the show and just making other women and men understand that they are not alone in how they're feeling, right? Portish began as a little bit of light comic relief and it has become and is becoming something so much bigger a community of women who want to learn, share and connect with one another and that is proof here today. We all need that, especially now and in a world

where so many women feel so invisible as they age. Creating a space where we can all laugh, cry, rant and celebrate together feels more important than our children. than ever. And from the bottom of my heart, it is our privilege to facilitate that through our podcast. So thank you to every single one of you who supports our shows, whether you've downloaded an episode, you've left a like or even a comment on social media, or you've shared us with a friend or just turned up to be here today. You have helped and are helping build a really important community. And it means more to us than you will ever know. What we've learned from making

this podcast is that no woman should ever navigate midlife thinking that she is the only one feeling this way. Thank you so much. All of you for coming today and we will see you next time.