40ish - Ankle Boots, Plant based buffets and Netflix Negotiations

Episode Date: November 20, 2025

Today on 40ish: Lauren wonders if long-term marriage really just comes down to which Netflix series you can both tolerate, while Nicole’s deeply unconvinced that the cowboy aesthetic is making a comeback. A listener faces a full-blown footwear crisis (seriously, what is up with ankle boots?)  and another dreads her company’s “Annual Office Holiday Experience.” Nothing says festive joy quite like a sustainably catered, plant-forward buffet! We love to hear from you! To share your feedback, dilemmas, rants, funny stories or general complaints about midlife please be in touch at: Email [e-mail] Instagram https://www.instagram.com/40ish.podcast  TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@40ish.podcast Facebook  https://www.facebook.com/share/DVQWb6y2vesgeHEK/?mibextid=LQQJ4d  To order our book HAVE YOU TRIED THIS?” click here  https://www.amazon.co.uk/Have-You-Tried-This-Only/dp/1801293139/ref=sr_1_2?crid=1O7EA4ZF1O5CS&keywords=have+you+tried+this&qid=1699449028&sprefix=have+you+tried+%2Caps%2C125&sr=8-2 This episode is sponsored by London Nootropics Get 20% off at LondonNootropics.com with the code 40ISH Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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400,000 Canadian entrepreneurs who already count on us and contact Desjardin today. We'd love to talk, business. Trinney didn't stop caring or worrying. Trinney went straight to Harley Street, is what Trinney did. It's a bit mean. Fearlessness as you get older is a much more attractive quality than looking 28. is it though I'd rather be scared

to look you on. Let's ask Trinny. Cowboys are the most in thing at the moment ever because of Landman's season two. The Sunday Times Magazine eight pages of cowboy. All it is is cowboy. I can't get away from cowboy. So if ever there was a time to wear the cowboy boot, it's this season now.

Why are you laughing? Hello, everybody, welcome to 40-ish... Sorry. Sorry. What's funny? I just did a small part. And then I was worried that it was going to be recorded in the microphone. And then I thought, it's okay, Nicole will edit it out.

And then I thought, no, she won't. And then I laughed. Anyway, I'm Lauren Mishkon, and this is 40-ish, the podcast where we discuss 40-something life. Very nice. Thank you. very nice thank you so much we discuss everything from that's happening in midlife what's happening in the news your stories dilemmas bring our own shit of what's going on in midlife yeah and that's it and don't forget you that's not it that's fine you can subscribe on apple podcast for early

access which means you get the shows early than anyone else add free listening across both at this show and self-care club and you get bonus content you won't get anywhere else and that's over Apple Podcasts. You can watch the video every week on Spotify. So please come and have a look at the video because it took me months to figure out video editing. And you can listen on any other podcast platform. Please make sure that you follow wherever you're listening. And if you've got something to share big or small, we want to hear it all. So please email us, hello at 40ish.com. Nice. That's it. That's the housekeeping. Done. Done, done and done. What 40-ish? delights have been going on in your life this week?

I spent Sunday night cleaning out my cupboards. Clothes cupboards? Were you influenced by me? Because I told you that Ollie and I had done it the weekend before. And also everything was all over the place and it was half summer, half winter. Oh no. And I just, I tell you why, because Saturday night had people coming for dinner and I just

did not know what to wear and I just couldn't find anything and everything was all over the place and I just thought I can't cope with this anymore and I cleaned them all out and honestly it's such a pleasure and a joy now. Yeah, because you open the cupboard, everything's wearable and you just choose what to wear. Life's so simple. Simple. Yeah. We're both feeling the joy of that now. Yeah. It's really good. That's a middle age thing. Oh yeah. It is because my clothes when I was like 20 used to just be on the floor. Yeah. The whole wardrobe. That's where my kids clothes are on the floor. And I sit through the carpet slash clothes pile and find whatever I was wearing. I don't get that

but then do you want it washed I can't remember the mindset at that age all I remember is I would rummage on the floor until your boys do that no way they're not allowed what's going on

with you just realized that a lot of marriage at this age when you've been together decades and you're both in your 40s and 50s boils down to

the negotiations of what new series to start you know so I noticed on the TV the other day that my husband had started boots don't know is it boots blades boots never heard of it boots what's it about I don't know is it the story of a chemist and a pharmacist and a patient who fall in love some army thing all right okay some military thing right anyway so whenever I say to him have you just started a new series he's like yeah yeah we have this conversation maybe once every other week why didn't you wait for me oh you wouldn't like it so he always says that and like when it came to something like suits yeah and i'm watching it in the background i'm like you know what i would

really like this and no no you wouldn't no no i would because i'm liking what i see so far i'm going about years obviously with suits but what's that about so it's always a negotiation but then every time i If I say something that I want to watch, he's already watched it. It's the biggest bane of our marriage. So what used to happen is I would watch one episode and then I would report back, you will like this, you will not like this. And then he would watch the first episode and then we would jump in together. But now, I don't know, I don't have the time to do that for him anymore.

I don't have the time to be his TV reviewer, his personal TV reviewer. So I was like, what are we going to start? Because we just finished Lazarus. Good shit. Shit, but entertaining shit. He's like, I want to watch. Is it a thriller? Yeah, it's a Harlan Coben thriller.

It's a bit silly, but it's very entertaining. It kept us very entertained for six episodes, eight episodes, I don't know. He said, I want to watch this Stephen Graham thing, blah, blah, blah, blah, on Netflix. I'm like, what is it? Because he only ever plays the same character. The same character. In everything he is. And whatever is going to be depressing.

He's like, oh, it's about neo-Nazis and he infiltrates the neo-exam. Exactly. I was like, no, no. No. I'm sorry, no. Especially not on the back of the traitors, like just nothing. Yeah, I'm like, I don't want to do neo-Nazis with Stephen Graham being angry and depressed. I'm sorry, no.

I'm so with you on that. I can't do that. Will you do the new series of Nobody Wants This? He's not going to do that. No, I won't. I'm like, watch Series 1. And if you get into it, I'll put, anyway. I know, Olly, well enough to know that that is not for him.

Anyway, I start watching, I'm just into series 2 already. And I can see him laughing, like, smiling and laughing. And I'm like, you like, you like, start series 1. I'll watch it again with you. We'll repeat it. And so you are his TV reviewer. So we watched episode one. He's like, I won't, I won't like it.

I don't like a romcom. It's not for me. It's a romcom. I don't do a romcom. It's classic romcom. Anyway, we're watching it. Yeah, but there's a lot of... He's smiling.

He's enjoying it. It's impossible not to enjoy it. Impossible. So, so we're in. But we're still, we haven't got that new... I want to watch Ploribus, which is the new thing from Breaking Bad. Yeah, but it's the people who wrote Breaking Bad and Better Call Saul. It's got to be good.

You know what? Better Cool Soul wasn't. brilliant. People rave about that show. Breaking Bad was amazing. You know what we need? You know what we need? We need a new succession.

Yes. We loved watching Succession together. You and me? Me and Ollie. Succession was by far hands down one of the best pieces of television I've ever seen. Fabulous. That's what we need. But new series of slow horses.

I've done. I've done. I've finished. Oh, I haven't. Right. We did that together. That's why I'm saying we're now in this place of like, what now? So are we.

But by the time we'd talk to. about it last night it got so late i was like i'm just watching the last episode of maths i'll see you see you upstairs you're still on maths it's finishing it's finished i know thank god i'm like actually i actually feel a sense of relief but i'm not trapped for an hour every night because i actually care i actually hate all of them and i don't care about any of them and i'm not invested at all but i've watched 33 hours why why have i nicoe why what's wrong with me why don't i just turn off I really regret it You know

And also you used the word trapped That is very dramatic Yeah but that is how I feel But I can't wait for it to end But it's all been your choice But has it Some very exciting news Oh yes

Hello's power list is revealed It features 25 of the most inspiring women in midlife. Who be they? Well, number... She's number one. Yeah.

Number one. She's number one. Then you've got Dame Twiggy Lawson. Twiggy. Yeah. She's not really in midlife. She's a bit past midlife. Isn't she?

I'm a young age. She's got to be 74. That's my guess. That's not midlife. No. That's not in the middle of your life. No. Unless you're going to like 130 now.

Atair Jewel. I don't know who that is. I don't know She works in the beauty industry I don't know Dame Kelly Holmes Yes I mean they're all very Yes

Are we on there? Are we on there? Is Claudia on there? Amanda Wakely Yeah And it will have like a slogan Mira Sayal Yeah

She says I'm much better at compromise But that comes with being Older and Wiser Mylene Klaus Really? Yeah Really She's won an MBA

She's been awarded an MBA for her work in miscarriage and stuff. At 47, I finally found my voice. Hasn't she always found her voice? Wasn't she a fucking singer? Had her voice at like 20? Her voice is now clear, unapologetic and brutally honest. Ruby Hammer. I'm about to say I bet Ruby Hammer's got to be on it.

Who is she? She's a makeup lady. Aging is a wonderful thing because it means you're living. You're alive. It's a blessing. You hear that? I actually really want Ruby Hammer's new lip shine. thing looks really nice trinny woodall i feel ageless i didn't stop caring i stopped worrying i stopped

worrying i started putting lots of filler in my face yeah that's that's that's that's that's trinny didn't stop caring or worrying trinny went straight to harley street is what trinny did it's bit mean it's fucking true though what's wrong with that i'm saying there's wrong with it yeah you don't say you stopped caring yeah you are charlie dimmer you don't know what she's talking let me tell you who's stopped caring. Charlie Dimock. She stopped wearing a bra. She ate every Kit Kat there was on offer and she didn't wear makeup. She stopped caring. Trinney's like into the makeup. She's into the whole aesthetic. She's done all her face down. But who do you resonate with more? That depends on the day to be quite honest with you. Today. Today. I mean you are what a fibber you are. I'm

telling you who you resonate with more. It's Trinney. I don't know if I do. I actually don't know if I do. You have blow-dried hair, you have a face full of makeup, you even are wearing your loafers. So don't tell me that you suddenly don't care like Charlie Dimmock. It's just never going to happen. It's more likely that I would walk around hoiking up a strange woman's bosoms than digging up weeds. Yes, that's a fact. You're never going to walk around without makeup.

You're never not going to care about what you look like. You're not. I'm sorry. But then I wouldn't say, I just don't care her anymore. But you don't know what she's saying. She doesn't care about. She might be saying, I don't care about. people's opinions on me. What does she say? What does she say? Why don't we read it before we judge? Trini Woodle's expertise in how to look and feel good has manifested itself in a variety of

influential roles from a beauty and skincare business to TV appearances with a mission to revolutionise beauty routines across the globe, Trini and her brand Trinney London, which she launched at 53 are breaking boundaries when it comes to feeling our best. Following her own success, she dedicates her time to supporting other entrepreneurs and champion. Women in Business. Trinney's attitude, here we go. Are you ready? Towards life in your 60s.

She's 60s? Are we calling that midlife? What's the definition of midlife now? I'm really sorry, but she does not look like she is in her 60s. That's because she went to Harley Street. But she looks good for it. Trinney's attitude, she does not look like she is in her 60s. Oh.

Oh. What's going on? James is coming. He's just adjusted the mics and he's moved them so far away. It's a bit late. Is that going to pick me up? Well, because you're looking at Lauren. But it's so far away the microphone now.

Trinney's attitude. You're ready for this, James. Do you want to know about Trinney's attitude in the six years? Do you know who Trinney is? Of Trinney and Zuzano. That's the one, yeah. But now Trinney London. Which I think is more successful than that TV show ever was.

That TV show was seminal. Yes. It was. Cultural. I think that means good. Yes. Cultural. Tell me all about Trinney.

It was iconic. She says, I feel ageless. I didn't stop caring. I stopped worrying. There's no clarification. She looks like an old piece of leather. No, she doesn't. What is it with you two and Trinney?

Have you been deciding together? Maybe. And can I also say her lip glosses, they're sticky as fuck. Those lip glosses that we got sent, you know, we got sent like her stacks. The eyeshadow, delightful, very nice. An excellent pigment.

Oh, my God, you had such a good colour as well. It was so nice. The lip gloss is gloop. You know, you were saying the other week, how you can't with lip glosses because of the gloop. I don't like hers. I'm sorry. I took that out of the show.

Did you? Oh, well, then no one will know what we're talking about. Oh, I can bring it back. I can bring that fine piece of content back. Please, why don't you use it as a special bonus episode? I basically talked about how I hate lip gloss. It doesn't matter. Who else is on this list?

of any interest. I haven't finished what she said. I just don't actually care. Yes, you do. Why are you so judging about Trinny? I prefer Susanna. She's much more down to earth with a slight alcohol problem.

I didn't stop caring, she says. I stopped worrying. I feel there's so much to do. I have this finite amount of time. I actually feel exactly the same. I feel exactly the same. And you know what? Sometimes it keeps me up at night.

Yeah, but this is all part of your existential crisis of living that you always feel like there's you have to suck the marrow from the door until the dusk like you have to reap every moment live every moment I don't know that I can't solve for you I don't know what that's about I don't have that Tessie Ojo my second act is about legacy and liberation this is my legacy what is this show this show is not your legacy it have to be I've got anything else you've got this three beautiful kids. Oh yeah.

Them. Oh yeah, them. You want to hear she received a CBE. What's the CBE? It's a very, very special.

You don't know. In 2020 for her services to children and young people and she continues to advocate for issues plaguing youth participation, diversity, charity, growth,

women in leadership and other social issues that affect young people. This is why. This is why I have an issue with the fact that I'm not doing enough. Is there any...

Because I read articles like this. Joan Malone. CBE, she's also a CBE. Aging is not a failure. What? Aging is not a fucking optional. Age or die, that's your option. But what a weird thing to say.

Aging is not a failure. It's like, you can't, like, you don't get a choice. It's like, yeah. Aging is not a failure but a privilege. I think they got the word wrong. You can't say that. Can't say aging is not a failure.

Let's just scroll on past her because fuck that. Marie Helvin. Yeah. She's not midlife. She's like 80. She proves that age is just a number. Yeah, because she's about 80.

It's all a bit twee this, isn't it? The model, writer and breast cancer survivor is combating the fashion industry's lack of age diversity, one picture at a time. This is not, she's not in midlife. I'm sorry. She's not in midlife. No. Mariela Frostrup.

Okay, perfect. Perfect candidate. She's also not in midlife. But she's closer. She talks about the menopoles a lot. She was probably one of the first advocates to talk about. talk about menopause, wasn't she? Fearlessness as you get older is a much more attractive quality than looking 28.

Is it, though? I can't be scared. Let's ask Trinley. This Giving Tuesday, Cam H is counting on your support. Together, we can forge a better path for mental health by creating a future where Canadians can get the help they need when they need it, no matter who or where they are. From November 25th to December 2nd, your donation will be doubled. That means every dollar goes twice as far to help build a future where no one's seeking

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Let's go to a dilemma. You'll like this one, I think. Before we dive in, a quick disclaimer, we're not doctors or healthcare professionals. If there is an issue you're seriously struggling with, please contact qualified expert. Right, here we go. This is from Olivia. This is the kind of dilemma that this show is all about. This is the kind of dilemma I like. This is peak 40-ish.

Yeah. Hi, ladies, I have a footwear-based crisis situation. Love it. I'm 44. I was always an ankle boot person. I swear they looked great. Healed, stylish, maybe even a bit edgy, but something has shifted. Now, every time I put them on, I looked like a geography teacher.

I have tried them with skinny jeans, which I know are now illegal. They're back. They're back. I told you Kate Moss was wearing them again and they were back. They're back, but it comes with caveats. Okay, we'll go on to that later. I've tried them with wide leg trousers. It's just all wrong. Dresses awful.

My legs look dumpy and I feel like a divorcee trying to cosplay a Sienna Miller or Helena Bonham Carter. I have spent evenings Googling how to wear ankle boots after 40, which I know is tragic because I used to just know how to wear ankle boots. is it me that has changed or has the fashion world gaslit me into believing my ankles are the problem do I persevere and reclaim my boot era or do I accept defeat and get rid of them thank you so much Olivia I do feel this I really feel this quite deep in my soul me too which is why it's a classic do you know who would have something to say about this trinnie fucking would yeah but trinny would wear ankle boots she would tell you to put a belt over it

Yeah, she's put a belt around the boot. Yeah, sticks. There's always a belt and sequins. Trinny would wear a kitten-heeled black boot with kind of a long skirt with a flare in it. But I don't want to dress like Trinney and I don't feel like Olivia does either. I do. Do you? It's always sequined in a fur jule and always a belt.

I really didn't know how much you didn't like Trinney. I used to adore Trinney, but something happened. What? I don't know. Does she get older, too old for you? Is that what it is? You might be in age. This is against Trinney.

No way, because Joan Collins is in her 90s and I'm all over her. Why don't you write Trinney anymore? What is this? It's not an age thing. Joan Collins is my icon forever. Be Arthur, love her. All the golden girls. I don't know.

I want to get rid of my ankle boots. I don't think James understands the concept of a podcast. Even though he runs a podcast studio and a content creation. Yeah. Because he's always in there having a meeting. chatting and you can and then he'll tell me that you can't hear him on the podcast but you can you can always hear him in the background sorry it's all right it's making content just maybe shut the door here he's coming in now he's coming in we're just saying how it's funny

how you run and own a podcast studio and yet you don't have the concept of when people are recording to be quiet and yesterday no Monday you were having a whole rant to Google on the phone we could hear you from the other studio with a doctor sitting in the room with him, who he forgot was there? Having a row with them. And then to the point that we got so distracted in hearing what you were saying that all we could hear is the word subscription, YouTube.

We stopped recording just so we could eaves drop. It's on the show. Have a listen. We wondered who you were shouting at. He's just looking at us like, like what? Whatever. Anyway. Anyway.

We don't need to do self-care families. Do you have any ankle boots? I do. What are they like? They're very old. Yeah, mine too. Old. Yeah.

Like 10 plus years old. I still slap them out. I've got three pairs. One are black suede with a heel so high I can only go from car to restaurant. No further. One, which is like an ankle pair of cowboy boots. They've got to go. No, you can't.

I'm sorry. When have you, have you ever seen me wear them? No, but you do like to buy an ankle. In fact, I can't even go into the cowboy booth in with you. I have one pair of full, but these are like a couple. I can't warn them. Not enough, not enough. I could start wearing them now.

It's winter again. But with what? With what to Nicole? I don't think it's a cowboy boot. Cowboys are the most in thing at the moment ever because of Landman season two. The Sunday Times Magazine, eight pages of cowboy. All it is is cowboy. I can't get away from cowboy.

So if ever there was a time to wear the cowboy boot, it's this season now. Why are you laughing? I don't know why I just found that funny. Cowboy. Cowboy style. is it in. It's never been so in. It was the way you said. I haven't even finished my sentence and you jumped on me like a bag of wolves. Cowboy is the most in thing ever. It is. You know what? I don't think so. I don't think so in all the

fashion influences that I follow. One person is wearing anything cowboy. Even cowboy hats. I'm not going to wear a cowboy hat. I promise. No. But they're like selling. No. There's no cowboy boots they're not they're not they're not it's going to start hitting your algorithm now and you'll see what i mean there's no fashion influencers that are wearing anything to do with cowboy there's no chaps there's no boots not chaps what's the thing that you put your gun in your setzen yeah that's your like the waste code that you stick your gun in your holder your holster holster holster that's a look that is a look i could put my phone and it protein bar in.

You would never put a protein bar in. No, I wouldn't. I'd put maybe a double-decker. A bounty. Yeah. And a gun. A bounty. And a gun. What can you do with the gun?

It would be a water pistol. So you could go and water your plants in your garden. That would be at the extent of it. It would be exactly that. Yeah. Spritter. What would I put in mine? Your water bottle on one side.

Oh yeah. My water bottle definitely. And then like a protein yogurt and a spoon. in the other the spoon would have it I ate the protein yogh

whilst I was waiting for you today no you know it would be in the other one my Invisoline

braces oh yeah the case for your emisiline yeah that's not what's in

Billy Bob Thorntons though I've never looked in Billy Bob Thornton's holster I don't really want to either

to be honest oh he's so great in Landman he's brilliant in Landman it's the role of his life anyway

back to the ankle boots I'm just thinking about the third pair which I fucking hate They're tan and they're really pointy They've got off the subject Because it was boring going through your wardrobe Sometimes you even grace us with Jackie's wardrobe

You know So what are you doing with your ankle boots? What do you want my doing with them I'm having them throwing a party Are you keeping them Or are you selling them Did you not get the invite? No I didn't

You have to RSVP Are you wearing them Keeping them getting rid of them Saying them what I'm going to do a grazing table It's being catered the lot What do you do? What do I do with them? They just sit in my wardrobe

Why do you get rid? I don't know I really don't know They're so useless And there's one pair that are like Burgundy which I know is the in colour And they're like their proper ankle boot Like proper with like a chunky heel

Oh I know the ones Yep They are so dated and so disgusting The only a geography teacher would actually wear these they've got to go they have got to go like what in the world are they doing

in my wardrobe it's actually not right do you know what Olivia save yourself the time of trying to style them up and just get rid of them yeah that's my advice

because then you're just you're just going into trainer territory that's all you're doing well today I'm wearing as discussed previously my shearling lined loafers so it's my daughter's birthday

coming up and she won't tell me what she wants so she's like I want a pair of shoes I'm like what shoes do you want I don't know I don't this is this is what I'm working with. So she says, I don't want any more trainers. I've only got trainers. I'm like,

oh, okay. So what do you want? Do you want some boots? No. So then I said to the other day, the girls are both in the car. And I said, what about a pair of loafers? They looked at me like I was, and Daisy said, my elder one said, is that a joke, mum? I'm like actually, it wasn't. It wasn't a joke. They are quite in. Yeah. Not for a 15 year old. I've seen really young girls wearing them. They wear them with like a knee sock in a non-ironic way. That would look amazing, like in an Avril Levine kind of way. Yeah, exactly. Well, that's what I was thinking. That is a thing.

Yeah, and she'd look great in that. And you could only do that at 15. Yeah. You can't do that any older. I saw SJP in a pair of knee socks the other day. Okay, SJP is the exception to every fashion rule. Apparently everyone's wearing knee socks now. You can't wear an ankle sock because it dates you.

I thought everyone was wearing cowboy. Well, yeah. Which is it? It's both. It's both. You can't wear an ankle sock anymore because only old people do that. You have to wear a knee. But I'm like, I'm sorry.

I can't get away with a knee. sock i can't do it what difference if it's under your jeans no not under jeans with like a middy skirt yeah or a dress or like whatever i i can't do that when do you ever wear a middy skirt anyway unless it's i don't really you don't even have a skirt you have one brown skirt so don't worry about it i feel like you're like worrying about something that is not remotely relevant to your wardrobe if you like we could go through the rest of your wardrobe but no one gives a fuck okay i really did have about three minutes of worry about how am i going to wear a knee sock. How am I going to do this?

Have I sorted it out for you? Yeah, I just don't have to. So that's actually a relief. It's another relief. That and the end of maths. By the weekend, I'm going to feel very freed up. This mental energy has been training me all week. I can go straight into the cowboy boots and not worry. It's all going to be. Your meltdown is that Vinted is stuck.

I can't talk about Vinted, okay, at all. I know you're locked out of the whole thing. But now they keep sending me emails to say you need to finish this sale, otherwise the sale is going to get lost. And I'm obviously getting a really bad rating. I can't get in? Well, can I tell you it's irrelevant because nothing is coming and nothing is going. No, I'm not receiving anything and no one is being sent.

thing. There is some sort of blockage in the system. They need like vintage dinerod because nothing is happening at all. And now I just get emails like if it hasn't arrived by December the second, you can get a refund or if it hasn't arrived and it's like nothing's arriving and nothing's being sent. I don't know what is going on with Vinted. In fact, if you do Vinted at home and you're listening to this, can you let me know if your Vintage is stuck? Anyone who works at Vintage no one works at Vintage. No one. And then I sent a whole barrage of emails because I was getting so fucked off and I got this reply saying we see that you've emailed about this problem already we'll get back to you in three weeks we've told you we'll get back to you in 48 hours please

don't email us again about the same issue I'm like fuck you I'll email you as often as I want don't tell me how often to email yeah yeah those women in that article they wouldn't take no for an answer would they no because they feel not scared to be they're in their fearlessness second act I'm going to email and say I'm in my second act and I'll email you every day If I want to. Because that's what I could do because I'm fearless now. Yeah, I am.

I mean, anyway, vintage is stuck. As you sit there in your cowboy boots and your stets and my knee and my knee high socks. Hi, ladies. I'm 49 years old. And I work for a big American company who I can't name, but who are deeply committed to political. political correctness. Who do you think it is? I reckon it's...

TikTok? It's a tech company, isn't it? Amazon? I don't think they're into political correctness. They still have like enslaved people, don't they? And he doesn't pay taxes. Yeah, it's not them. There might be TikTok. Might be. Or like Coca-Cola. It's someone very modern. It might be like meta. My department received the invite to what you and I would call the office Christmas party and I just cannot deal. But I feel like you two will appreciate it. The event has been rebranded the annual office holiday experience because they don't want to, in inverted commas, centre a narrative. Highlights include. Well, why, what's centering a narrative? Well, like, probably at Christmas, because then you can't celebrate if you're not Christian.

Yeah, but I'm not Christian and it wouldn't offend me in any way. But it could. It has potential. But it's weird if it did. Agreed. But come on, you're not Christian. Would that offend you? No, because it's Christmas and we live in a Christian country. Also, We haven't discussed our office Christmas party because apparently we're not doing one now. You just do one with your best friend and that's going to be the end of it. Oh my God. I'm finishing this and then we'll have a row about the office Christmas party. We don't have one.

Highlights include a mindful mingling session, a sustainably centred plant forward buffet. And zero proof cocktails. Does this sound like the shittest event ever? Yes. We've also been told that Secret Santa has evolved into a conscious gift exchange where we will Donate in each other's names to worthy causes. Let's be honest, it's just a tax deductible dressed up as altruism. I honestly would rather sit naked in a patch of nettles than attend,

but I had to write an enthusiastic RSVP to my department manager. I feel too middle age for this bollocks. I could not agree more. What happened to cheap warm white wine and twiglets and gossiping with your colleagues at the photocopier about Liz in accounts getting pissed and flashing her tits? Pray for me, Alex. Alex, you're so right.

I'm so glad I don't have to deal with this shit. I always say I'm unemployable. Yeah. I couldn't work in a big corporation. I just couldn't part up with the book. Can you imagine me? No, you'd be sacked. Let me tell you something.

I have never been sacked from a job in my entire life. That's very good. Have you? Yes. There we go there. I've never been sacked. I've been asked to leave. Everyone always likes to have me around.

Just FYI. Why are you unemployable then? Because I couldn't part with this bollocks. I couldn't keep my mouth shut and I just couldn't. And I just, because the level of patience that I just don't have any, not a fucking shred. So this, no. No. Just no.

No. Just no. You know, Alex, do you have to go? Can't you just be ill that night? You know what I mean? I wouldn't go. I just wouldn't go. It sounds so boring.

Dreadful. Boring, dreadful. Dull as dish. What a snooze vest. You lost me at Plant Forward buffet. Yeah. Sorry. No.

Just going to have wind at night. It's just not happening. Let's go. Okay. We've got to go and have a round about our own office Christmas party now. Let's go and plan on. What's it called? Our own annual office holiday experience.

Yeah, because we don't want to centre the narrative. Okay. Let's go do that. Let's call it getting drunk in a really flashy restaurant in London. We did do that last. yeah well let's do it again great yes yes i wear my knee socks and your chaps yeah we'll be back on tuesday have a great weekend everyone bye