40ish - Aussie Deception Drama & Varicose Veins

Episode Date: November 14, 2024

This week on 40ish: Lauren and Nicole receive an email offering varicose vein treatment, a listener is in a bit of a pickle after lying at work and one woman in desperate need of a wee completely lose...s her sh*t in public and now regrets it.  We would love to hear from you!  To share your dilemmas, rants, funny stories or general complaints about midlife please be in touch at: Email hello@40ish.co.uk Instagram https://www.instagram.com/40ish.podcast  TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@40ish.podcast Facebook  https://www.facebook.com/share/DVQWb6y2vesgeHEK/?mibextid=LQQJ4d  To order our book HAVE YOU TRIED THIS?” click here  https://www.amazon.co.uk/Have-You-Tried-This-Only/dp/1801293139/ref=sr_1_2?crid=1O7EA4ZF1O5CS&keywords=have+you+tried+this&qid=1699449028&sprefix=have+you+tried+%2Caps%2C125&sr=8-2 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 What do Ontario dairy farmers bring to the table? A million little things. But most of all, the passion and care that goes into producing the local, high-quality milk we all love and enjoy every day. With 3,200 dairy farming families across Ontario sharing our love for milk, there's love in every glass. Dairy Farmers of Ontario. From our families to your table,
Starting point is 00:00:25 Everybody Milk. Visit milk.org to learn more. McPops from McCafe are a new sweet treat available in three delicious flavors. Berry, white chocolate, and hazelnut and cocoa. Perfect to add onto a small $1 plus tax premium roast coffee. It's a match made by McCafe. At participating McDonald's restaurants,
Starting point is 00:00:44 prices exclude delivery. You know what? Let me come to you. If I've got a faulty-ish problem, you don't need to point it out and assume it's there. I will come to you. How dare you come to me? If you were kind, you were like, oh, hi, blah, blah, blah, thanks so much. And then I texted you and I was like, I want photographic evidence of your varicose veins because I've seen your body and I ain't seen no varicose veins on it. Have you got some? Are you hiding them from me? Where are they? I am going there because they don't know. They don't know.
Starting point is 00:01:22 And unless you follow us on Self Care Club and I haven't finished and have listened to us for many, many years talking about this, they won't know. They don't know and unless you follow us on Self Care Club and I haven't finished and have listened to us for many many years talking about this they won't know so I'm filling them in. Before we jump into the show we're very excited and honored to tell you that we're currently part of Spotlight. Spotlight is a project from Apple Podcast which highlights a creator or creative team every couple of months and they have chosen us for the month of September. Apple's editorial team believes that you're going to want to be spending a lot more time with us and we definitely want to spend more time with you so they kindly put us together. Thank you Apple Podcasts. We really hope you enjoy this new show and we really hope that you stick around to talk about all things midlife.
Starting point is 00:02:01 and we really hope that you stick around to talk about all things midlife. Welcome to 40ish, I'm Lauren Mishcon. And I'm Nicole Goodman. This is the brand new podcast that navigates the challenges and absurdities of 40 something life and solves all your dilemmas. Well, we're gonna attempt to. In the coming weeks, we're gonna discuss your problems,
Starting point is 00:02:22 issues and rants that you've kindly shared with us and also divulge our own stories about the mess of navigating midlife. Basically it's to make us all feel better together and so that none of us feel weird or worse about the mundane chaos that is middle age. How are you this week, Lauren? I've never felt more 40ish in my life than when you and I received a joint email this week. Completely.
Starting point is 00:02:49 You know what I'm going to say don't you? You know what I'm going to say. You got so upset about it. I've never been so fucking offended in my life. It wasn't an email. It wasn't an email. It was also 40ish. It was actually a DM request.
Starting point is 00:03:03 It was a fucking email. Did she DM it as well? It wasn't. It was in email, it wasn't an email, it was actually a DM request. It was a fucking email! Did she DM it as well? It was an email. It was in our Instagram DMs. It was an email saying, Dear Lauren and Nicole,
Starting point is 00:03:15 I run, I'm gonna read the fucking email now. It was in our self care club email. I don't care what it was in. I don't give a shit. It was on our self care club account. What it was in. No, I'm just saying that's our wellness account. Hi Lauren and Nicole. I look after the PR for Bleep. I'm not mentioning the name who specialize in laser treatment for thread veins and varicose veins. And I wondered if you'd be interested in a treatment. Thanks. How do you think? I mean, I don't know how you felt, but when I woke up, I replied, I replied, I replied, I replied, I replied, I replied, you replied and you were like, Oh,
Starting point is 00:03:55 hi, blah, blah, blah. Thanks so much. And then I text you and I was like, I want photographic evidence of your varicose veins because I've seen your body and I ain't seen no varicose veins on it. Have you got some? Are you hiding them from me? Where are they? Okay, lots of questions. Basically, I was a hairdresser for 30 years. Yes. I was stood on my feet for 30 years. Yes. And that does create thread veins. Where are they? On my legs. Show me. No. Fuck off. No. I'm not sure they're showing you.
Starting point is 00:04:27 There's one on the back of my leg here that... Whatever! What I'm saying is you've taken it as a total insult. Oh my God, it's so insulting. It was a nice email to receive. Okay. I will be honest. I did look at the company because I wanted to know what is the treatment for such a thing?
Starting point is 00:04:45 Yeah, that might occur. And do they offer anything else I may be interested in? Yeah, and do they just do that shit or like... Do they like do laser hair removal? No, they don't do anything. They just do varicose veins. And it actually looks quite unpleasant. There's needles, there's local anesthetic, there's lasers, there's stuff. And I thought, oh, do you know, even if I did have them, I don't know if I'd want that anyway.
Starting point is 00:05:06 But also don't assume because that we're in our 40s, we have them. Oh, okay. We're getting to the bottom of it now. That's the problem. That's the problem. So because you're in your 40s, you don't wanna be associated with 40ish things,
Starting point is 00:05:22 even though you've now set up a podcast about it. You know what? Let me come to you. If I've got a 40-ish problem, you don't need to point it out and assume it's there. I will come to you. How dare you come to me? What is a sexy problem that occurs in your 40s? Name me something like cool, young and sexy that happens in your 40s. Hold on. Sexy and problem don't go together. What is cool, fun and sexy in your 40s. Hold on, sexy and problem don't go together. What is cool, fun and sexy in your 40s to do with your body? Knowing your own mind.
Starting point is 00:05:49 Oh. To do with your body? Yeah. You just basically. No, I don't agree with that. Starts to decay. No, it doesn't decay. It doesn't decay, it doesn't decay.
Starting point is 00:06:00 Oh, okay, we're all getting younger. We're not. Listen, pre, pre back surgery. Now she's in denial. Pre back surgery. I am someone who likes to work out a lot. Pre back surgery. Pre back surgery. Let's just highlight, underline, put that in bold. I was the strongest I'd ever been. Great. I was the strongest I'd ever been. Great. I was the strongest I'd ever been. Yes.
Starting point is 00:06:27 I'm gonna repeat it. Okay. I was the strongest I'd ever been. Well, that's cool. And that there is nothing cooler and sexier than that. I was also, I was in great shape. I was in great shape. I only ever see it retrospectively to be fair, but I was.
Starting point is 00:06:46 That's cool. That'sively to be fair, but I was. That's cool. That's sexy to be in great shape when you're over 40. You know why? Because it takes so much more fucking work. You are like on one today. On what? What am I on? The monologues.
Starting point is 00:06:58 Monologues. You could do the vagina monologues about menopause. The 40ish monologues. I fucking could. We should change the name of this podcast. That is going to be our live show. Me stood on the stage just ranting about people's perceptions of perimenopause because you have a lot of them and let me tell you something, it's okay.
Starting point is 00:07:19 It's not a perception when you wake up to an email about, hi, would you like me to laze your fucking non-existent varicose veins? No I don't have any thank you no thank you thanks so much bye bye. Instead you completely ignored the email didn't you? On purpose? Yeah. But they're only, listen they they see us they see us doing a podcast they want a bit of exposure I get it. Let's follow this through. They're hustling like we are. Hi, hi, lady, anonymous lady. Yes. We'd love to come and film having some varicose veins lasered off our legs and put that all over social media. No, thanks. I'm sensing a lot of anger. Do you know some people? You know what veins in their vulvas? That is a thing. It's an issue. I know your face says it all. It's true. I'm not joking. How does that even happen?
Starting point is 00:08:16 Happens in pregnancy. I've seen them. It's not nice. It's all right. Those days are over. You've seen, you can only get them in pregnancy. I don't think you can only, but it does happen then. Does that hurt? Yeah, yeah. Not very comfortable. You know the last episode you talked about a bunch of grapes as hemorrhoids. Now you're talking about, like, just stop it. Stop it. I'm not. Just stop it.
Starting point is 00:08:36 I'm not going to stop it. Just before we dive into your dilemmas, a quick disclaimer. We're not doctors or healthcare professionals. This is a fun space where we share our thoughts. Which could be totally wrong. So if there is an issue that you are seriously struggling with, please contact a qualified expert. All right, Nicole, I have got an email in for you today.
Starting point is 00:09:05 Dear Lauren and Nicole, since perimenopause started, I have developed some rage. Oh, I hear you, sister. I feel you, I get it. But worse than that- No, no, because you're not in perimenopause, remember? No, I'm not, I've just got just general non-perimenopause-related, sometimes occasional rage.
Starting point is 00:09:23 But worse than that, quite an urgent bladder. As in when I when I need a wee, I really have to find a loo quickly. Yeah. You really relate. You're relating to that. I am hard relating to that. But I also really need a wee all the time. It's so true. I thought you were gonna say annoying. So thank you for that. I wasn't. I'm not even gonna say it may also be related to your water consumption because I just don't have the time or energy
Starting point is 00:09:53 for that conversation. And I really wanna tell you the rest of this story. I was out shopping with my daughter on the high street when the need presented itself. I went into the nearest place, which was a gastropub. And I asked the girl at reception area who was in her 20s if I could use the loo. She said no it was for customers only and said I had to buy something. Oh that's annoying. I said I'd have the cheapest thing on the menu which was a coke. She pretty much thrust the carb machine into my face. I said that I'd left my
Starting point is 00:10:20 daughter outside with my bag which had my wallet and my phone but I really needed to use the loo first and by now I was completely desperate so I just walked through to the loos with her shouting after me. Good for her. Good for you. I used the loo and I walked out feeling angry and embarrassed. Oh I thought she was going to say liberated. She followed me, stood in the open doorway and watched me get my bag. I went back in the car and paid. She still made her buy the bloody coke. The restaurant was full of customers.
Starting point is 00:10:50 As I walked out, she reminded me in a really patronising tone for me to take the coke. I lost my rag and I shouted, I don't want the fucking coke you jobs worthy little cunt. It'll just make me want the loo again. Wait until you're 48 and about to piss yourself. Everyone in the place turned and stared at me. Please tell me they clapped. I left. When I pass this place again, which I definitely will because it's on my local high street, should I go in and apologize? Wow. Wow. I really want to know where this was. I really want to know where this was. Okay. Lots to talk about. I so relate to the bladder problem, the rage, the jobs worth,
Starting point is 00:11:41 like all of it. And I am so happy that she stood up and she screamed, maybe not calling her the names that she called her, don't massively agree with that, but she screamed that you wait till you are 48, you just fucking wait, because you just fucking wait, seriously. Because when you need to go, you need to go. And actually what this waitress was doing was being very unkind and very
Starting point is 00:12:07 unaccommodating, but it would have taken nothing for her to say, you know what? Just go to the loo. It's totally fine. Yeah, nothing would have taken nothing. She doesn't understand the rage or the bladder problems. She doesn't get it. But she will, Nicole. She will. She will. Coming for everyone one day, even even me. Well, your bladder doesn't get it. But she will, Nicole. She will. She will. Coming for everyone
Starting point is 00:12:25 one day, even me. Well, your bladder doesn't seem to be coming. My bladder is vast. It's also empty because you don't drink anything. It could literally hold half the water in London in my bladder. No, it couldn't. My parents used to call me a camel. It doesn't, it's not that it holds a lot of water, it's that you... It has capacity. No. No. It does. You don't drink anything. I drink enough to keep me sustained. If you scanned your bladder and my bladder I'm telling you my bladder would have a larger capacity than yours. I would say you probably have a slightly smaller than average bladder. I would say I probably have a slightly larger than normal bladder. I mean, what a diss. I don't even know why that's a diss, but it feels like a diss. It's not. I'm just cabling you. I've had three children and I can hold a wee in forever. Forever and ever and ever.
Starting point is 00:13:24 Well, let me tell you a story. Yeah. That is not something to be proud of. It's actually very dangerous. It's actually very- I'm not saying I do it on purpose, I'm just saying I could. I could. My best friend, who now lives in Miami, she always used to do that.
Starting point is 00:13:37 Yeah. And used to like talk about it as if it was she deserved a medal because she always holds her wee in. She would literally sit at my house when the toilet was right there and she would say, oh, I can't be bothered. Yeah, I get that. Until, until. What happened to her?
Starting point is 00:13:51 One day. It's like a cautionary tale. Yeah. She got rushed to hospital because she had the most horrendous kidney infection. And the doctor said to her, and I reminded her of this a couple of months ago when we saw each other, the doctor said to her, and I reminded her of this a couple of months ago when we saw each other,
Starting point is 00:14:05 the doctor said to her, do you empty your bladder properly? Because this is probably why you have such a bad, she was in hospital for days over this kidney infection. I cannot tell you how unwell she was. Coincidental, it could have been completely coincidental. That is not from not doing a wee. You know what that is? What?
Starting point is 00:14:23 Fingers in the ears. Yeah. And just la la la-ing it. My kidneys are fine. My bladder is fine. I have capacity. I know your kidney is fine and your bladder is fine because you don't drink enough.
Starting point is 00:14:35 Okay, okay. Your bladder is, I don't think you're... Firstly, no one knows the size of your bladder versus the size of my bladder. Nobody. I'm telling you I'm right. I may not my bladder. Nobody. I'm telling you I'm right. I may not have extra vision, but I'm telling you I'm right. You know what's really annoying about that?
Starting point is 00:14:51 I also agree with you. Yeah, of course you do, because it's factually correct. It's not, no. It's not built on fact because we haven't actually measured them. Oh my God. I don't have capacity or bandwidth
Starting point is 00:15:05 to have a hydration debate with you on this podcast. Basically, if you're listening to this. Oh God, she's going there. I am going there because they don't know. They don't know and unless you follow us or Self Care Club, and I haven't finished and have listened to us for many, many years talking about this, they won't know. So I'm filling them in.
Starting point is 00:15:22 So I just leave. I'm filling them in. You fill them in briefly. Lauren doesn't drink very much. I drink a lot. Yeah. We have been hosting a wellness podcast for many, many years.
Starting point is 00:15:33 And all the experts, and we've had many on the show, one of the big pillars of wellness is called, what is it? Hydration. And Lauren doesn't believe that. She doesn't believe that you need to hydrate to stay well And I'm always trying to prove the point that you do She is always trying to disprove I just believe like when you're thirsty have something to drink if you're not thirsty
Starting point is 00:15:52 You don't need to just sip fucking sip sip sip on your Stanley Cup sip sip sip sip all day long for the sake of like whatever the fuck is I think it's like a Problem basically the hydration conversation between you and me is the equivalent of we's like a problem. Basically the hydration conversation between you and me is the equivalent of we were on a break. It is our, it is our we were on a break and until the day we both die, we will never ever agree. I tell you what, I won't be dying of dehydration, I gotta tell you. I watched that episode of Friends the other day where Ross is whispering to baby Emma, and if mommy ever tells you you we were on a break.
Starting point is 00:16:25 Who are you whispering that to? Who's our baby? The dogs? Yeah the dogs. I will say to Barker and she does drink too much. I don't care what she says. That's why she always needs a wee. And you will whisper to Miley she just doesn't hydrate enough. She just doesn't hydrate enough. And that's, it's how we were on a break anyway. I don't think she should have dropped the sea bomb. Really? No. I don't think she should have dropped the sea bomb Really? No, I don't I don't think you should ever drop the sea bomb. Oh, I disagree. Sometimes it is the only Appropriate last time you dropped it. I've definitely dropped it to you not at you. But like I have definitely said hey are She's just a cunt. Oh
Starting point is 00:17:06 Sometimes it's the only appropriate phrase. I don't think it's ever appropriate. Oh, it is. Sometimes you can't cover what a cunt they are until you just drop it. Do you know what I mean? Sometimes it's that bad. I'm feeling very uncomfortable, very uncomfortable. Why? Why? Because you're normally quite posh and reserved.
Starting point is 00:17:25 And you dropping this C-bomb feels- I'm saying you save it. I don't drop it on the reg. But I'm saying if you- Who are you? Who is this? On the reg. If you've got a situation-
Starting point is 00:17:37 Don't say that, Elan. Where there is no other appropriate word to describe the person, then you drop it and it has some weight. You would never, ever, ever, let's say she was in a Starbucks, for example. You would never be in this Starbucks and say, you would never have said that to the waitress, ever.
Starting point is 00:17:56 You can't even say it. Go on, say it, job's worth your little c**t. No, I don't want to say it. I don't want to. Why? Because this is a classy place. But that's what I'm saying. It's not something to be used every day. It's not your average word. It's a word you reserve for the truly c***y people in life.
Starting point is 00:18:14 What I'm asking is, would you have come out that toilet and when she's still thrusting that coke in your face, would you have turned around and screamed at her and called her the c-word? I don't shout in shops or in public. You don't shout. I don't really shout. It's not really my vibe. So I probably wouldn't have done that.
Starting point is 00:18:33 But having said that, I'm obviously not in pair menopause with rage and an urgent bladder. But if I was, who knows what could happen. And in the future, Nicole, many years into the future. I just want to say that actually, you did miss a period two months ago. Fuck off. Well, you did miss a period two months ago. And you were like, oh, I think I manifested
Starting point is 00:18:53 because I thought about taking this pill because I was going on holiday and I thought about taking the pills but I didn't get the period and then I just didn't get the period. And I think I just manifested because I didn't wanna get a period when I was on holiday. That's all true.
Starting point is 00:19:04 Mate, mate. It's all true. Mate, you are in fucking perimenopause. You've also got a frozen shoulder. You also do get quite rageful over really weird shit. You also are losing things. I don't, you know, I don't want to gaslight you into this, but I really feel like at some point you are going to have to wake up to the fact that you are 46 years old and you might have some symptoms of perimenopause. It's not a fucking weakness, it's just a fucking fact, just like you think your bladder is bigger than mine.
Starting point is 00:19:33 Wow, are you done? Yeah, I feel great. This NFL season, get in on all the hard-hitting action with FanDuel, North America's number one sportsbook. You can bet on anything from money lines to spreads and player props, or combine your bets in a same-game parlay for a shot at an even bigger payout. Plus, with super simple live betting, lightning fast bet settlement, and instant withdrawals, FanDuel makes betting on the NFL easier than ever before. So make the most of this football season and download FanDuel today.
Starting point is 00:20:06 19-plus and physically located in Ontario. Gambling Palm, call 1-866-531-2600 or visit connexontario.ca. Think about something you're good at. Now think about how you got there. Chances are, you had someone to help you get started. If you're thinking about starting to invest, Questrade's award-winning support team is here to help you learn how to become a better investor. From placing your first trade to setting up customized stock alerts, we're always by your side. Just a few of the reasons why we are Canada's number one rated online broker by
Starting point is 00:20:39 Money Sense. Get started today at questrade.com. Bumble knows it's hard to start conversations. Hey. No, too basic. Hi there. Ugh, still no. What about, hello handsome? Ugh, who knew you could give yourself the ick? That's why Bumble is changing how you start conversations.
Starting point is 00:21:00 You can now make the first move or not. With opening moves, you simply choose a question to be automatically sent to your matches. Then sit back and let your matches start the chat. Download Bumble and try it for yourself. Our second dilemma. Yeah. Oh, it's good. I'm ready. It's good. Get ready because I think you're gonna have a lot to say about this. Aussie drama. Oh I'm in a bit of a pickle, she says. Three months ago, I went for a job interview for a job that I applied for on a whim, but never in a million years thought I would get.
Starting point is 00:21:36 Just to amuse myself, as I had been to so many interviews that week, I conducted the interview in an Australian accent. Oh, you fucking legend. I got the interview in an Australian accent. Oh, you fucking legend. I got the job. Oh no. For the last nine weeks, from Monday to Thursday, between 10am to 6pm, I have been conducting myself as a fake Australian.
Starting point is 00:21:58 I've had to create quite a backstory for myself and googled towns on the Gold Coast so I can answer questions from my colleagues. I have never been to Australia. She's never even been. My only knowledge comes from watching Maths. Oh my god. She's asking what the hell should she do? You've got yourself into a right hole there mate. Have you ever had anything of this sort of thing happen before? Like have you ever been like you know you hear people that they go on dates and they'll say
Starting point is 00:22:43 they're like in their 20s say they're like in their 20s when they're really in their 30s and they start seeing each other for longer and it starts to go somewhere. And it's like, at what point do I tell him I'm actually 36 and I told him I was 27? You know, you can see how this shit would happen. I did, I have mentioned this on our other podcast
Starting point is 00:23:01 but I did go through a phase of about a year when I was in my mid-teens, when me and my best friend concocted this story where we were cousins of new kids on the block, and basically lived our lives in an American accent for the best part of a year. Yeah, but you totally got away with it. Yeah, totes got away with it.
Starting point is 00:23:19 But we were teenagers, it wasn't a job. I didn't have to go in nine to five and pretend to be from another country. I mean, wow, she's got herself into a right little one way alley. I remember when I first started dating Adam, and it's not quite the same, but it does remind me of this. When I first started dating Adam, I was really, really, really skinny.
Starting point is 00:23:38 Now I've never really been skinny. I've always been quite voluptuous. I've always been like a really healthy body size and I always had, when I was younger, I had much bigger boobs and I had like, you know, I had the big boobs and the sort of the Jessica rabbit shape and a big bum and big thighs and I was always very curvy. And I just lost loads away. I was on some sort of, oh, I know why I was on some migraine medication and it just took away my appetite. So when I met- Name please.
Starting point is 00:24:03 Write down that fucking stuff I'm buying you now. Can you inject it? I think these days it's called ozempic. Oh yeah, okay. I don't wanna do that. And I got really thin. Anyway, so I went on this date with him. We started, you know, obviously it took off quite quickly
Starting point is 00:24:21 and we got quite serious about each other quite quickly. And I felt like I was giving him misinformation because he- Just by being skinny. Yeah. Because I knew I wasn't gonna stay skinny because it wasn't my usual body type. So I really had to come up with a time,
Starting point is 00:24:37 the right time to inform him that this isn't my normal body shape. This is not my real body. Yeah. I know you're seeing it, it's not VR, but actually it's not me. Yeah. Right. Well, now you could say these days,
Starting point is 00:24:47 you could say it was AI. You could, you could. I know you think you're sitting at a dinner table with me, but I'm actually AI generated. This is a shallow howl kind of situ. But the opposite way around. Yeah. So it really took me a long time to pluck up the courage
Starting point is 00:25:03 to say to him, by the way, I'm not normally this skinny. What is she going to do? The question is, do you like this job? Like, can you leave? Can you find another job? Because you can't suddenly say, oh, I made it up. Because you're going to look like a... you're going to look... well, you're not going to look good. I think there's a few options. I think the first option is gradually, gradually, slowly, slowly, over the weeks and possibly months,
Starting point is 00:25:31 the accent fades. And then when people are like, gosh, you don't really sound Australian anymore, you could just come up with, well, I've just been here so long now that my accent's fading. And then eventually, people are kind of going to forget. They're not. I think they're not. She's created a whole backstory Lauren. That's okay but she doesn't live there now. Secondly or yeah okay this is my other option you could announce that you're part of a social
Starting point is 00:25:59 experiment which has now come to an end. You were getting paid by a company. You could do that. No, no. You could. No, no, no, no, no. You could quit. What's the social experiment? To like go into a company and like pretend
Starting point is 00:26:15 to be from another country. You could say it was like a promotion for the Australian Tourist Board. Let me ask you a question. If someone started to work with us and we hired somebody and they were presenting as Australian, and then a couple of months later, even if they were really good at their job,
Starting point is 00:26:31 they suddenly said to us, by the way, I'm not Australian, I'm actually British. And I did it as part of a social experiment. As a promotion for the Australian Tourist Board. I would have a big question mark over said person, wouldn't you? Or, because that wouldn't sound right to me, this day and age she could just say, I now identify as British and from now on I will only be using a British accent even though I'm really Australian and do that. But she's still lying. Or, or quit. Quit. She could quit and find another job
Starting point is 00:27:06 and don't go into the next job interview, Australian. Or, well she probably has. Yeah. Actually I've got the most amazing, the most amazing answer. Yeah. She could tell the truth. Of course she can't tell the truth.
Starting point is 00:27:23 She can't fire her. Do you think they'll fire her? Yes. What if she's really good at her job and say like look I've got, I've got a pathological liar. I've got a really embarrassing situation and I need to tell you that I came in and never in a million years thought I'd get the job so I thought I'd just fuck around and I started with an Australian accent and then it all just spiraled out of control. And now you think I'm from the Gold Coast when actually I'm from Brixton. No. You've got this thing about like telling the truth. I don't know what that is about. Just like, why? Never tell the truth.
Starting point is 00:27:56 What do you mean I've got this thing about telling the truth? You just got to think, you're always like, be honest, speak your truth, tell the truth. And don't tell the truth, never tell the truth. It's not a thing. The truth is not good. It's not a thing, The truth is not good. It's not a thing. It's like part of who I am.
Starting point is 00:28:07 It's kind of integral to my fucking character. Never tell the truth. Just like my small bladder. Yeah. The truth is never a good option. The truth is the only option. No. The truth is the only. The truth is like, hey, I have grey hair and I don't colour it. Hey, I. You don't need to say that because people would see it. Because if you're colouring it all the time, no one knows I have gray hair and I don't color it. Hey, I don't need to say that because people would see it. Because if you're coloring it all the time, no one knows you have gray
Starting point is 00:28:28 hair. Just don't just don't know. Just fudge it all all the time. What are you fudging? Everything. What are you fudging? Is your name even Lauren? No. Do you even like me? Not even British. You actually are straight. Is this you? But the other way around? This is you, isn't it? You've written this in. I'm actually Australian and I've been presenting as British. I feel like in this day and age, she can also come up with some sort of gem like I identify as Australian even though I'm not. No one could say anything. You just have to brush over that.
Starting point is 00:28:59 But they talk about her behind her back. Okay, fine. But it's behind her back. So she wouldn't know. She she she's got to quit. You got to quit or tell the truth. She'll get off the pot. Thank you so much for listening to 40 ish and being a part of our lovely 40 plus community. Do you have issues with fake accents? Have you ever called anyone a jobs worthy cunt in a shop? If so, we'd love to hear from you. Hello at 40ish.co.uk, that's 40ish.co.uk. Please write in anything you want to tell us,
Starting point is 00:29:40 any of your problems, any of your embarrassing moments, any of your things that you're not embarrassing moments, any of your not so things that you're not quite so proud of, anything that you're struggling with. We want to hear it all and we will anonymously unpick it on the show. And please come and follow us on our socials at 40ish.podcast. You'll find us on TikTok with the youngsters, Instagram with the 2030 somethings and Facebook for sensible people of our own age. Oh, and also on the YouTube. It's just YouTube. Just YouTube. We will be back next week with another episode.
Starting point is 00:30:13 See you then.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.