40ish - Bad Hair, Midlife Sleep & The Canadian Gynecologist

Episode Date: June 29, 2026

Today on 40ish, Nicole is having a hair moan, because apparently menopausal hair now requires its own emotional support team. Lauren is not helping. We also get into your feedback on whether it’s normal or deeply unhinged to track your husband’s location. Opinions are strong and polarising but our favourite is from a husband who says he’s usually in the loo. In Midlife News, we discuss a new study suggesting poor sleep in midlife can have long-term effects on women’s wellbeing. So basically, yes, your snoring husband may be a legitimate health risk. This week’s dilemma comes from a 47-year-old listener who feels drained, disconnected and completely unlike herself. She asks if she’s alone - answer - no way! Plus, we have a meltdown from a woman whose Canadian gynaecologist with a very niche sense of humour. Come for the fun, stay because you’re too tired to leave. Buy tickets to our live show here: https://podlifeevents.com/event-details/40ish-live-show-5-jul-2026-tickets You can now follow us on Substack! https://open.substack.com/pub/bethlisogorsky/p/off-campus-season-one-prime-review?r=7u0jz7&utm_medium=ios&shareImageVariant=split Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

There's no space. There's got my hair in this world. I just want to talk about my hair without someone making it about them and their hair. I just need a safe space, no. But my perimenopause is all breaking hair. My meltdown is this. Yeah. Shorts.

Yeah. You know, like the whole wear the damn shorts business. Everyone's wear the damn shorts. Yeah. Wear the damn shorts? Just wear the damn shorts. I am wearing the damn shorts. Hate myself.

Hate wearing shorts. They're comfortable shorts. They ride up my backside. I sit down and they've like disappeared. Like my vagina has eaten them. Like where do they fucking... I have a little vagina meltdown this weekend. Oh, let's tell us about your vagina meltdown.

What a lovely soundbite that was for me. I was reading an article. Everybody, welcome to 40. Shal Nicole Goodman. And I'm Laura Mishkon. This is the podcast tackling 40-something life. Every week diving into midlife, news, stories, dilemmas, and our own joys and delectations and delights

of being in our very late 40s. Very, very late. Very, very late. From the small to the large, we figure out how to survive midlife together, one crant, one crant. One crant, crisis and crackdown at a time. You can now watch a video of this show back on Spotify.

We're back on Spotify. You are welcome. And you can listen on any other podcast platform and also on YouTube. And if you've got something to share, big or small, we want to hear it all. So please email hello of 40ish.com.uk. Two more things.

Please make sure you are following and subscribed to this show. You can do that on whatever platform you are listening now. It really helps with the algorithm. And if you think someone in your life is going to love 40ish and they don't know about it, please, please share it. The easiest way to grow this show is through word of mouth. So thank you. What's your most fortish moment of the week?

Sorry to bring it back. but it feels very present. Okay. It's my hair. Oh God! Don't you, if you used the word, Mumsy. No, I wasn't.

Okay. I wasn't going to use Mumsy. Because we've let that go for a few weeks now. It seems to have died down. I don't want to bring it up again. It's like poking the bear, but you haven't once called yourself Mumsy.

And at least I've been counting, it's been about two weeks. If you must know, I think this dress is a bit, Mumsy. It's cute. So what's the problem now? It is a little. little mumsy. What's the problem with the hair now? Because a mum would wear this dress.

You are a mum. And also people who are not a mum would wear that dress. Okay. So it's, I don't think it is a mumsy. Um, my hair. Yeah, is not happy. What do you mean? It's basically, it's basically breaking. Why? Because I'm, it's, since my surgery, my hair has changed. Oh, God. Yeah. Telling you, it's not the same as it was. Now, I've always had very nice, very healthy, very shiny. hair. Fabulous hair, as the woman in the bakery said to me. Fabulous hair. The woman's got the most fabulous hair. You're just saying it's not fabulous anymore. It's not fabulous hair. It's broken hair. It's breaking hair. Listen, I know you're searching for something clever to say. Don't say it.

I'm not. Save it. Just save it. Just zip it. No, no. You are not in a position to talk about it. I realize I have to talk to you about it because this is what we're doing and we're on the podcast. Last you can talk to about it. This is the thing, right? Nobody, nobody wants to talk about my hair. And I've had this all my life, okay? Because I've always been the hairdresser. And the minute I start talking about my hair, and I have said this before,

the minute I start talking about my hair, someone then talks about their hair, right? So there's never been. There's no space. There's for my hair in this world. I just want to talk about my hair without someone making it about them and their hair. I just need a safe space. moan but my perimenopausal breaking hair. Menopausal hair.

My menopausal hair. I feel very seen. I know you're taking the fucking piss, but I actually feel very seen. I need a same space to be upset about my menopausal hair. Okay. There's my most... Here it is. It's your own platform.

I'm really upset. I'm sorry. What can I do to help you? You can't do anything. Can I buy you some oliplex? I am using oliplex. I am using oliplex. And then this morning I woke up and it was like, I've got layers in my hair.

Not because I've cut fucking layers, but because it's broken so much. No, no, you did cut the layer fringing. No, I did. You did. You cut the layer re-fringed thing in. First see, a layer fringe is nothing. Well, you did cut it. It's either a layer or it's a fringe.

You did cut it. No, I cut it. But that's a fringe. Right. That's not a layer. Right? And then if I go to the hairdresser to talk about my hair, they don't want to talk about my hair either.

Well, they have to. You're paying them. No, no. Well, they're my mates. They can't be far to talk about my hair. And also, when someone came into the salon when I was right at the end and they wanted to talk about their hair. It's like, I don't need to talk about your hair.

Because I know about your hair. I know what we're going to do. Like, you don't even need to open your fucking mouth. I know what I'm doing. Like, stop talking about your hair. Can I just suggest like a beret? Like, you make a look out of wearing hats. You become like that woman who wears a.

a hat. Like switch it up from sunglasses to like jaunty hat. I'll tell you what you can do. I've just worked out what it is you can do. Okay? When I tell you, I feel like to talk to my husband. When I tell you, I'm upset about something. Yeah. Right. What I would like from you.

Yeah. Should I cry? Cry? Get out my miniature violin. Play it. Yeah. That will really make this. space feel very safe. That will really help. Thank you.

You're welcome. Can I just say, right, I feel like whatever you bring to me, I create a space for it. You do. I create a safe space for it. Okay? I am empathetic. I am compassionate.

I am understanding. I'm just not that bitch. I'm just not that person. You are sometimes. When it's really serious, right? Yeah, I mean, but, you know, your hair looks very nice. It looks fabulous. So I can't empathise.

If you had really bad hair, I would say to you, oh dear, poor you. But you don't. It's relative. Okay. This is why no one wants to talk to you about your hair. You see, this is why. Oh, this is why. Why?

Because basically it's like saying, oh my God, I keep losing weight. It's that. Yeah. It's like, oh God, I'm now I'm like a size six. I don't know what's a size eight. Yeah. Oh, poor you. Yeah.

It's that. Okay. It's that. Okay, I got it. But it's still a problem and it's still upsetting me, but I feel like I have to be silent. I've been silenced about my beautiful lushe's hair. I'm being silenced about it.

Be silent no more. This is what you can do. Not bring out the small violin. Yep. Okay. And not cry. What you can say is... Yeah.

Come on. I hear you. Yeah. I see you. Mm-hmm. I understand. Yeah. That sounds very tough.

Okay. Okay. Should I practice it? Lorum. Yeah. I feel really upset about my hair. It's breaking because I've had surgery. Yeah.

I don't know if you know, but I had a hysterectomy. Did you? I did, yeah. Wow. So, and it's been quite a process. So I've gone from being perimenopausal to very much menopausal. And that's been a bit of a shift, which I wasn't really expecting. Sure.

That sounds hard. Say more. One of the hardest parts of that is my hair. What's happened? What's the change? It's gotten very brittle and it's breaking and it's just not the same quality hair that I used to have. That sounds so difficult for you as a woman who really likes to have beautiful, perfect hair at all times and is used to that. It must be really difficult. It is. I hear your problem and I see you. I'm sorry you're feeling that way.

May I suggest? Béry? Let's go to some feedback. Okay, people have a lot to say about Is it normal or weird to track your husband dilemma that we had the other week. People had various opinions on this, right? These are the TikTok replies.

It's absolutely ridiculous. Says one person. Kirsty said, I share locations with my family, but it started as a way of being able to track lost phones. The only time I ever track my husband is when he's coming home with the takeaway. Same. Get that, I get that.

Or you need to put the oven on or something. Yeah. Tush says, flip that around to a man tracking a woman. tracking his woman, sorry, and see if it sounds controlling. It does. Yeah, it actually does. Has been arrested on Real Housewives of Rhode Island for tracking his wife. He put a track on her car.

No, that's dodgy shit. Yeah, he got arrested. And did he say like it's in case the car got stolen? No, because he's been having an affair. So it was basically to track where she was and if she was coming home. Yeah, terrible. He got arrested. Fucking hell.

Yeah. Splat says, I don't track anyone. My sisters think I'm weird because I don't track my teen. they track everyone apparently now even the son's girlfriends i share my location on whatsapp if it's a bit dodgy but that's it it's definitely controlling and insecure and then some guy on instagram this was my favorite reply he said my wife wouldn't need to because 90% of the time i'm on the toilet and i just thought that is so true and thank you for sharing that because that's just true marriage information isn't it where are you in the lou yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah that is

absolutely brilliant Brilliant. What is Midlife News this week? Reasons to leave your snoring husband. Okay. Raising that in the title. Go on. A new study presented at the Sleep 2026 conference.

I mean, can you imagine that conference? No. Found that sleep problems in midlife may have long-lasting consequences for psychological well-being. Researchers followed 574 adults from the midlife in the United States study, assessing sleep quality in 2005. to 2006 and then measuring psychological well-being nearly nine years later. Oh my God.

People who reported more sleep difficulties such as poor sleep quality or disturbances tend to score lower on measures of well-being. Well, that is so obvious. Nine years later. Including purpose in life, personal growth, self-acceptance, autonomy and positive relationships, even after accounting for factors such as age, education, employment, health status and baseline well-being. Yeah, but sleep is the absolute fundamental to your entire well-being.

the findings were particularly striking for women after adjusting for other health and lifestyle factors the link between poor sleep and lower psychological well-being remained significant for women but not for men suggesting that sleep may play a uniquely important role in women's long-term emotional and psychological health but it doesn't in everybody's health yeah but I think women need

women actually need more sleep than men but women get less sleep than men I am always lost up to bed and first up in the morning. So am I. Always in my house. And I'm also the only one that is disturbed in the night if the dog's going to be sick or someone comes in or something happens. The researchers noted that sleep problems could be an important early risk factor

for reduced well-being later in life and that sex-specific sleep interventions during midlife may help protect mental and emotional health as people age. Just before we dive into your dilemmas, a quick disclaimer, we're not doctors or healthcare professionals. If there is an issue that you are seriously struggling with, please contact a qualified expert. I'm 47 and not feeling great about anything.

I'm so down, I'm not depressed, I just don't feel good about anything. I have five children, age 16 to 25, to live at home with me. I have an amazing partner who does anything for me. He loves me and cares for me. I just don't want to do anything except be at home looking after the house. Cleaning, food, shopping, gardening, pottering, or have I written this? cleaning food shopping, gardening, pottering around at my leisure.

I have little me time. I work part time. I used to love my job, but even now that gets me down. I look in the mirror. I don't see the person I was. I once was. I'm drained. The perimenopausal hot sweats are waking me multiple times a night.

I've been prescribed HRT, but I'm not sure I want to start taking them as they increase the risk of cancer. I definitely have social anxiety. I'm due to have my hair done Friday. I've have it done every seven weeks since the age of 18, but I'm just not feeling it. I can't be bothered. Tell me I'm not alone in these thoughts.

I have to tell you, I have never heard more in one week the phrase, I can't take HRT because it's going to give me cancer as I have this week. And having just done this every woman festival and listening to Dame Leslie Regan, who herself, on this show,

told the listeners that she... Not on this show, self-care club. Sorry, told us... Let's just give that a bit of context. I don't want you to trip over that just so that they understand what you're talking about. we did in every woman festival in London a couple of weeks ago.

We hosted the menopause tent where we did nine back-to-back talks with doctors all talking about menopause, the different stages of menopause, in relation to their specialty. Yes. And Dame Leslie Regan, who is an obstetrician gynecologist and she is one of the most prominent gynaecologist in the country. And one of the most knowledgeable women. She came on Self Care Club and told our listeners that she herself had had breast cancer twice. Yep.

And she still takes HRT. And she reiterated in the tent that day that the only women, in her opinion, that she feels cannot take HRT or should not take HRT are women with terminal liver cancer. And she said even some women with terminal liver cancer say that their menopausal symptoms are so awful. and as they are terminally ill anyway, they would rather still take the HRT. I have seen this online all week. Oh, I've got this, this, this and this and this, but breast cancer.

Oh, I've got all these terrible symptoms. I feel so terrible, but my GP said I can't take HRT because of cancer. And a lot of the doctors said, because this got asked numerous times this question, are there people that shouldn't take it? Yes. They all said,

if you have been told that you cannot take it, What you need to do is go to a menopause specialist. Yes. Because a lot of GPs are not trained with the up-to-date information about the menopause and about HRT. And also because it is so identical now to, it's like bioidentical, they call it. Yes. It's not, they don't use synthetic hormones anymore. Everything is bioidentical.

So it is much safer than it used to be. I think it originated from horse's urine. Yeah. They found that there was estrogen in horses urine. It's not ever prescribed to you in that way anymore. So it is much safer than it used to be. That study that showed that it increased your risk of breast cancer was in 2002. It was done on post-menopausal women in their 70s.

And it's now been completely debunked. It is old, outdated information. But unfortunately, women still have that stuck in their heads. and they are going on that information, which is not correct anymore. So you do not have to suffer, can take HRT. If you are feeling like this, and my goodness, you really are, by the sounds of it, really suffering. Yes, yes. Please look into it, listen to that episode on Self Care Club about HRT, inform yourself, and start taking it.

And can I just say, like this, I'm not depressed, I'm just not feeling good about anything and I can't be bothered to do anything and I can't be able to get my hair done. And that feeling of not wanting to engage in your life is, I know that it, we normalise it, but it is not okay. And all I remember is the minute that HRT was in my system and I felt better, my thoughts were, I am back in the room. I am back. And that feeling of wanting to escape from your life and just lie in bed and not do anything is so destructive.

but we normalise it so much. So please do. Go and find a specialist that can really help you. Find someone who is very up to date and knows what they're talking about. Don't just necessarily take our word for it. Do your own research. But it is incredibly safe to take HRT. It's incredibly important to take HRT for a number of reasons.

Like it helps with heart disease, Alzheimer's, osteopenia. That is just a few of the things. Lack of estrogen affects every single hormone in your body, every single organ in your body. So it's no wonder that you are feeling so awful. All of that. We wish you well. We have both been there at completely different times

with completely different symptoms from each other. But we both found our way back through the correct dose of HRT. So we wish you well. And please do seek out a professional that really is in your corner and wants to help you. Okay, my meltdown is that I basically became a 12, hour. No, 12 is much too large

than an hour. Six and a half hour human buffet over the weekend. Because it was hot, the windows were open. I have been bitten to pieces. Hence why I'm having to wear long, long sleeves, long dress. Because my body is, I mean, I am all the way up my arms, all the way down

the other arm, all up my legs. My face. I've got a huge one on my face. I've got mauled on my legs. My ears. I have been, they've been feasting on me and I woke up the next morning just itching horrible I said to Ollie I am like sleeping next to a human mosquito repellent because they just feast on me all night then they're stuffed and then they leave and you

don't have a single bite this has been 25 years of my life like this they just don't bite him no because they go to me this is the weird thing what I noticed was this used to happen to me all the time and I got very allergic all my child my teenage years horrendous and then stopped for quite a while now I'm always on the HRT, they love me again. What's that about? Eestrogen. I mean, they love me.

I'm not happy. I am like itchy. I'm covered in bumps. I've got a huge one right in the middle of my face. Can't see it. Huge. Really itchy. Are you taking adiastamine? No, I'm taking anti-sand cream and cream and this and that. Anyway, that is my meltdown.

I don't want to be a nighttime buffet. That's my memory. Just take a fucking anti-histomy. But it won't stop the munching on me. No, but it stops the itching and it does take down the bites. Now it's going to be so hot this week. I'm going to give you an antihistamine when we get home. It's going to be so hot this and the windows are going to be open and what will happen next?

Right. My meltdown is this. Yeah. Shorts. Yeah. You know, like the whole wear the damn shorts business. We did to share the damn shorts. Yeah.

Wear the damn shorts. Just wear the damn shorts. I am wearing the damn shorts. I hate myself. I hate wearing shorts. I feel uncomfortable in shorts. They ride up my. backside. I sit down and they've like disappeared like my vagina has eaten them like where do

they fucking go. Like I feel so unconsorably shorts. It's too hot for long trousers. It's too hot for leggings. Okay. It's too hot for leggings. So I have to wear shorts, especially when I'm playing paddle. But I have to. But I hate myself in them. Could you wear a cycling short type affair or could you wear one of those things like the tennis women wear? I bought a couple of tennis skirts. Yeah. Yeah. Do they have ones that have like cycling shorts? under them. Yes. That's how they all work.

Okay, but that would be cool. Can you wear that? Yeah, I can. Yeah. And I did. But on Saturday I was at a paddle tournament all day. Yeah. So there was no, it was boiling.

There was no way. No. Like wear leggings. No. So, and all the women were in tennis skirts. Yeah. I just feel so disgusting in shorts. But do you feel disgusting in tennis skirts?

Yes. Oh. You will never ever, have you ever seen me in a short skirt? Never. Right. Because I, sorry. I know it's completely unfashionable to say it. but I hate my legs. I hate my legs. I work on my legs three days a week. Three days a week I do a

leg session. I have done for many, many years. I still hate my legs. Always hating my legs. I realize they get me places. I realize they're strong. I realize what they do for me. I get all of that. And I'm very grateful for my very healthy strong legs. But I hate how they look. I hate how they look and I hate how they look in shorts and I hate how they look in the tennis skirt. And that is my fucking meltdown. And no matter how many campaigns there are of wear the damn shorts, I still hate them. That is a nice little rant. Well done. Listen, this section is for meltdowns.

I get it. I don't love wearing shorts. I don't love. I don't hate my legs, but I don't love them. Have you ever seen me in a mini skirt? No, but I've seen you in shorts. I will wear shorts if it's very, very hot. But I found like, it is a conundrum at this age because can't really wear like a hot

hand short because no. Like who? But you also can't wear like a Bermuda short because Mumsie. Mumsie. Mumsie. Hatshag Mumsie. Mumsie slash Mumsie. Golf. Old lady.

Mumsy. Yeah. Beyond Mumsie. Grand Mumsie. Like a Bermuda. Especially the ones with like the high waist with the belt now. I mean just no. Just no.

But I'm at that age where I can't wear a little denim short. That's what I'm saying. So hence why am I meltdown about shorts? I get it. So I have these like, I guess you call them like track suity material. Yeah. Kind of thing. Yeah. They are very short and I would only wear them on holiday from wearing a swims.

But they're casual. Yeah, yeah, but from wearing a swimsuit and I'll shove them up. Yeah. So literally yesterday I went out for lunch. It was absolutely boiling hot. I actually wore this dress that I'm wearing. Yeah. Okay. That's where I'm nice.

It's fine. Yeah. But I went to put on shorts. Yeah. But what am I wearing with the shorts? Shorts are kind of, they are for the garden. Or they are for. put it over a swimsuit for holiday.

They shouldn't be because wear the damn shorts can't pay. But what's the fucking down shorts? So right. So I can't wear a denim short because it's not smart enough. If you're going to a nice restaurant, it's just not. No. It doesn't matter what denim short it is. It's just not.

No. And then you can't wear a Bermuda short because I don't, I don't play golf. Because I'm not 75. And I'm not 75. And also I can't wear like there's a certain length of short. I just look disgusting in shorts. And what fucks me off the most about it, I'm going to repeat it is that I work on my legs three days a week.

Three days a week and I still hate how they look. It's, it really fucks me off. It really fucks me off. And every year when I put those shorts on, I never know what's put on with them. Every year, you know what? I got yesterday. I should be over this shit.

I was in town yesterday. I had six minutes in Primark. You've never seen a woman move around at Primark quicker than me. Why did you only have six minutes? Because I had to meet somebody. So I was like very, I was very short. How are you like,

Hocon-Dagreb is your dad. You met your dad. Met my dad. It's not very secret. I don't know why you say it's like utterly irrelevant. I was meeting someone. I was meeting my own dad. Yeah.

Because it's irrelevant to the conversation. No, but it's, but it sounded weird by saying I was meeting someone as if you were having some weird like, I was having a very normal Father's Day lunch with my dad. Anyway, there's. Six minutes in Primark. Yeah, why don't you just go after?

I bought, because he drove me home, I bought a co-wored set. Do you know how long? long I've been looking for a co-ward set for. But co-ords. And it involves a skirt. Shorts. No, it involves shorts. They're kind of like, I'm going to say this and it sounds awful, but they're not that bad.

Bermuzas. No, like more of a box. Coolots. No, but coolots have come back in. Right. So I'm so good. I don't wearing a cul-lots. If I wear a cul-ot, take me out of the back and shoot me.

I've got cul-lots. No, I hate a cul-lot. They look so awful on me. They're so badly balanced on me. They're so awful for my proportion. Okay, well, you know, we're not just talking about you here. They're like a boxer shorts, like a man's boxer shorts. Yeah, Lily Rose has got those, yeah.

Anyway, they're like a blue and white stripe with a little shirt thing. I don't know how I feel about it, but it was prime up price, so I don't really care. Even if I just wear it on holiday and then I don't ever wear it again, I don't really care because it's prime arc. But I feel like it's okay. I bet it didn't cost you less than 20 quid, though. It did. How much was it? 8 quid.

I think the whole set was 17 pounds. Oh. Yeah. Yeah. Still 17 pounds. It is. I know it's inexpensive for a co-ord. Yeah.

Listen, the Henny's ones, 40 quid. And it ain't any better quality. And it looks like pajamas. Hennis, listen, you won't hear me say a bad word about Henna's. No, listen, big fan, big fan. This dress is Henna's. I love an H&M. This dress is Henna's.

Yeah. I'm not slacking off H&M. The best Hennis, the best Hennis is in Oxford Street. Yeah, that is an amazing one. Because it's really sort of. out my girls and it really sorts out me. It's got every single collection department there. And it's even got the makeup.

Oh, come on. What? You're not buying Henny's makeup. I'm not buying the makeup, but sometimes they have like a really good blusher brush. Let me tell you something. Or a little bits and pieces. Oh, they have, okay. Yeah, the tools.

Eyelash curlers. Henney's sportswear. Yeah. Is it? Yeah. It's not cheap. It's cheaper than sweaty, Betty. Yes, it is.

No. The leggings are what? The leggings are 40 quid. the good ones. Oh. But their sportswear is great and their vests are great and honestly great quality. I think I might need some new sports bras. Go to Henne's.

Okay. Jim Shark have a salon. Everywhere has a salon. I said it last week. It's a nightmare. Okay. I don't know how to solve the shorts conundrum. No, I'm not asking you.

I hear it. I hear you. I see you. I understand. It will resonate. It must be very difficult for you. Thanks. also I wasn't going to say this but here we are we're here now something else has happened

other than my hair since I've been menopausal and I've only been menopausal since February yeah let's just clarify yeah I have I actually don't know if I need to share this I think you're here now so no I don't I don't want to share it oh really oh I think you do I don't think I do oh I think you do oh I think you are okay I have Cellulite Yeah Above my knees That never used to be there

I never used to have cellulite On the front of my legs Oh Used to have some cellulite Like near my bum Yeah But now I have it on the front of my legs And that just really

Fucking upsets me So basically my whole meltdown Is about my legs Yeah Even though they're healthy and strong I thought you could say something Much worse than that Like what?

I don't know Anything We could say anything Yeah Some guy Came up to me on Saturday because I did this

whole paddle tournament I was out all day and he was like oh you know I talked about coming on your podcast he's a coach of some sort right not a paddle coach oh he's a paddle coach but he's okay so I was like all right have you listened to the show he's like oh well no I said you know what I don't think it's for you mate I don't think it's a great fit so he goes well what you talk about yeah so I said well on self-care club it's all about well-being but it is very much aimed at women in midlife I said I said and on 40-ish we don't have guests it's a very exclusive club. I said, and we talk a lot about vaginas. Yeah. He's very straight laces guy. I did it for the shock factor. And he said,

I like vaginas. Good for him. He's like I like vaginas. I know you like vaginas. But you can't really talk, come to talk about that. I have a little vagina meltdown this weekend thinking about it. Oh, let's tell us about your vagina meltdown. What a lovely soundbite that was for me. I was reading an article about this guy. I believe, I don't know what his name is, but he's now like called Dr. Vagina and he's basically rejuvenating the vaginas of menopausal women and it made me kind of wretch. Oh he's putting like filler in their labia to make them look youthful. Are you joking?

I'm not joking. We've had this conversation before. Like your face sagged. Yeah. So does your labia. And your collagen goes. Like the sort of young, youthful looking nice puffy labelling. becomes less full and can droop a little and women don't like it.

Anyway, he's best known for dealing with only fans and adult entertainment stars. Fair enough. Okay, if it's your business, like I understand that. If it's being filmed up close on a daily basis, one would want it to look nice. I get it. Yeah, it's like we have Botox in our face. I have Botox in my face. You don't. I don't, but as much as I wouldn't have it in my face, I certainly wouldn't be having it anywhere else. But that's not your business. It's not my business. It's not anyone's business.

No, it is actually people's business. I was reading this article on the sofa and I was going like, oh my God, oh my God, blah, yeah, and Olli was like, what, what? And I said, I just said, I just said, I just said, I don't want to have filler in my vagina. And he was like, what? What? Because he's just sitting on the sofa and I'm just coming out. I was like, I don't want to. I don't want to have that. He's like, who's making you? I said, no one, but I just, I don't want.

It's like the pressure on women, now they've got to have filler in their vagina. Like, leave it alone. I was like, do you think I need filler in my vagina? He's like, I don't think so. I was like, does it look the same? Does it look the same as 25 years ago? It's not meant to look the same. He's like, it's like, I don't really spend much time thinking about how it looks,

but you don't need to have hot so. Let me ask you. Does his look the same? I mean, I don't think Adams is. I mean, I don't actually, I don't actually spend time thinking about it. I also don't really care. I think it does look. the same. I think it looks the same. I don't think they change. But then it's like, well, he doesn't

look the same. When I look at photos back of when we first got married, obviously he looks much younger. Yeah. So I'm assuming that other bits on his body, you know what, it's not fair to talk about Adam like that. It's not. No, let's not objectify them. But I just, you know, poor Adam. I just don't, I just don't like, I just don't like, I just don't like, I just don't like, I just don't like, I just don't like, I just don't like, I just don't like, I just don't like, I just, I just don't stops dead. Because he doesn't know what they've heard. What will be great is that in a few weeks time people will say, Adam, did you enjoy the show when Nicole talked about how your Willie looks different now you're older and he'll be like, what? I didn't say that. I know.

But I didn't say that. You didn't say it. No. No, you didn't say it. But anyway, it's all age. It's what I'm saying. We all. We all age. And our body's age. And our body's age. They're supposed to. It's normal. They're supposed to. Yeah. It's normal. It's normal. Yeah. So let's not pick them apart. Who? Our bodies? Our labias. Yeah. Let's just leave them to labia around as they were like. It's a bit late. I've had so much fucking work done down there. I don't even know what's where anymore. I don't know what's...

That sounds very confusing for everybody involved. It is a bit. I'm going to read the listener meltdown. Just listening to your more menopause symptoms 40-ish episode, and I was listening to the bit about the size of your patch. Thank God she didn't say the size of your labour. Oh, patch, patch, patch. Yes.

Oh, HRT patch. Yes. Yes, she says they get bigger as you go up in strength. But it also massively depends on the brand. I used to have Easterdot, which was tiny and made me happy. But for whatever reason, it's almost never available. So I was switched to Everall, which is so much bigger. And it would do the rustling thing.

Yes, that's what I said to you. And the Everall doesn't stick properly. And I then found that some of my synchral, which is so much. We're getting worse again. Yeah, it's not good, the ever, I think it's cheaper. The GP reckoned it's because the patch isn't sticking properly, so I don't get the full dose. I have moved to a spray called Lenzetto. Yeah.

People love the Lenzetto. Do they? It sounds like someone from Greece. It sounds like a character from Greece. Well, it's, hey, Lenzetto, do you want to go for a ride? It does. Well, you could say that to Lanzetto. Do you want to go for a ride?

Do you want to go for a ride on my thighs? No, you put it in your arm. On my arm. That doesn't sound as good. Yes, I do have to do it every day, but it isn't like a gel and it absorbs very quickly. Oh, it's like a mist. It's a mist. And I massively rate it.

But she says, GPs can't do maths. So they gave me three pumps to last three months. But how long it lasts depends on your dose and therefore how long a pump lasts. So I need mine every two months. And also with the Lensetto, you can't, you never know when it's getting empty because the bottle itself is completely opaque. Yeah. Right. Good word. So can't you shake it?

It's quite thick. You can't tell what's in there and what is it? Because it's such a light mist. It's a bit like the gel. Have you ever used the gel? You also can never tell when that's empty either. So when I used to use either one, I was like in constant fear of it running out.

I see. So she says, I need mine every two months and I have the same battle every time. Sorry, slight meltdown there. Well, no, you don't have to apologise. This is the place for meltdowns. This is where you come to have your, meltdown. So don't ever apologize for the meltdown. We encourage them. We do. Yeah, we do. Well, that's a lot of information in that message for me. And I imagine many other people.

Have you suddenly become like menopause experts? I certainly don't feel like one. But I think people just like to share their menopause stuff. I do. I said to my friend the other day, who's not going through menopause yet. I said, just so you know, whatever you need to know, I pretty much know. I mean, not to like gas myself up, but I'll gas myself up. I've learned on the job Emily also wrote in her little meltdown Hi ladies my name's Emily and I listen to you from Ontario Canada Hi

Nicole I couldn't help but think of you when I saw my OBGYN I love it when they call them OBGYN When I saw my OBGYN recently after having a hysterectomy What did he nick your crisps? He said to me you no longer need to have regular pap smear tests Unless you're into that sort of thing which no judgment I laughed so much as it was not only very weird,

but it reminded me of your doctor who sat on your bed and ate your potato chips. Thank you, Emily. I hope he doesn't listen to the show. You know, I hope he doesn't listen to the show. Who? Your gynecologist?

Yeah. I think it's unlikely that he does. He's busy. He's really, really busy. He is busy, yeah. I don't think he does. No. We could get him on the show.

He's actually very funny. He could talk about vaginas. Okay. So we need anyone. else on here to talk about them. I feel like we talk about them enough. Just the two of us. Do we need a third wheel? No. We don't want one. No, we don't want one. Let's go. I'm hungry. I'm a bit tired now. Okay. I'm sorry. I hear you. Let's go and fix that problem. I'm here to support you with that.