40ish - From The Archives: Period Necklaces, Parking & Homebase

Episode Date: August 20, 2026

We are taking a break over the summer holidays . In the meantime, please enjoy this classic episode from the archives. This week on 40ish; a woman asks if it’s sweet or if it’s weird to give her daughter a necklace to celebrate her first period. Lauren is hoping the idea may inspire Nicole’s husband to buy her a very special wedding anniversary gift. Plus, a listener asks what happened to her rock n’roll husband who used to play the guitar but now the only bass he is interested in is Homebase.  We love to hear from you! To share your feedback, dilemmas, rants, funny stories or general complaints about midlife please be in touch Email [e-mail] Instagram https://www.instagram.com/40ish.podcast  TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@40ish.podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Two and five Canadians will hear the words, you have cancer. That's why every step and dollar raised matters. On September 19th, join thousands in Toronto for the Princess Margaret Cancer Foundation Walk. Challenge yourself, friends, and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research. Together, we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear of cancer. Register today at pmcfwalk.ca.ca. Hello, mid-sized business. We see your big ambitions,

but how do you achieve the wins you want when your technology is holding you back? SAP Grow is built to grow with your business, no matter its size, with AI embedded at its core, working across every system, all ready to go from day one so you can hit the ground running.

Bring it with SAP Grow, AI Cloud, ERP for any size business. Hear that? It's your money calling. It wants a promotion. Elevate your savings with the Scotia high interest savings account. Always earn high regular interest rates that grow the more you save and invest. Conditions apply.

Visit scotiabank.com slash hisa to learn more. Scotia Bank. You're richer than you think. Sometimes your search for a new home can feel like it's going nowhere. But every month at AIB, we help hundreds of house hunters become homeowners. Our specialist mortgage team are on hand to help you every. step of the way. Moving mortgage applications to mortgage approvals, changing can we into we can and turning hoping into owning. Because we don't just help. We help make it happen. Apply for your

mortgage today, online, in branch or on the phone. AIB for the life you're after. Allad-Arsh Bank's PLC and AIB Mortgage Bank UC are regulated by the Central Bank of Ireland. I'll tell you what I do think is weird. The women who make necklaces out of their breast milk. You heard about those? You don't know those people. I fucking do. I'm as a doler for 16 years. I know.

You make a necklace out of breast milk. Yep, they put it in resin. He is now 48 and has developed an intense interest in our driveway. You can make like a little special necklace or ring with the semen. That's special, isn't it? No one does that. No one does that. No one does that.

No one. Oh, yes. It's my anniversary today. I'm hoping that's what I get as my gift. I wish Adam got you a necklace. Hello everyone. Welcome to 40-ish. I'm Nicole Goodman.

And I'm Lauren Mishkon. This is the podcast that navigates the challenges and absurdities of 40-something life. And every episode, we discuss your problems, issues and rants that you have kindly shared with us. And we share right back with you about what's going on in our own middle-aged lives. We do. So, come on.

I mean, there's a lot going on with Lauren. I mean, I wish that we had, I wish we'd been recording the conversation just before we came on air. I'm glad we weren't recording the conversation. There's a lot, isn't there? Yeah, there's a lot going on. I mean, I was going to give you my most 40-ish moment on Friday when I realized that I'd reached kind of peak middle age. But, I mean, kind of peels in comparison with everything that's happened since.

But I did have that moment on Friday when it was the end of the afternoon and I was feeling really content. I thought, why am I feeling so kind of content and happy? And I realized I had spent my day with three delightful things, Pilates, cooking and gardening. And I thought, I'm so happy and content. And yet, this is so peak 40 something, isn't it? I'm so proud that there was a piece of exercise in there. Thanks. That's great.

Thank you. And surprising. And new. New-ish. New-ish. No, but new that it's bringing you such contentment that it's now part of your joy. So much so that I've even bought. Wait for it.

Pilates Grippy Sox. Wow. Yep, I've invested. Did you go to Lully Lemon? No, I went to Amazon.com. com. Good, because if you'd have gone to Amazon.com, it would have been a problem. It would.

Got three pairs, baby pink, grey and black. They're set. Yes. They've got little elastic across the front. They're ever so nice. Yeah. They are. I was really proud of myself.

I felt like a real, like, yeah, I'm someone who does Pilates now because I have Pilates socks. Yeah. But you are someone who does Pilates. I actually am. Yeah. Yeah. That could be your 40-ish thing.

It's never been so kind of proud. You can do Pilates. I am a woman who does Pilates. Yeah. and makes apple tarts and gardens. Yeah. I am 40-something. Hear me roar.

Thank you for bringing the apple to hot up. Oh. I'm so pleased you brought that up. Okay. Because I said to Lauren, we were texting each other. And you sent me a message early one morning last week. Friday morning. Oh, it was Friday morning.

Yeah. On the same morning that you were feeling so content. You sent me a morning saying, this is my morning workout. Now you would think, listeners, that due to what we've been discussing, she would have been sending me a photo of her doing Pilates, but no. No. She actually sent me a photo of her apple tart. Yeah.

It looked very gorgeous. It was really nice. I was making that at 7.15 in the morning. It's also not a workout, but I very much appreciated you sending it to me because you were proud of it. You wanted to share it with me and that means a lot to me. So thank you. Thank you.

And I wrote back and it spiraled. The whole thing spiraled, didn't it? In fact, maybe I'll just pull the messages up. My morning workout, and there's a photo of... Afflementioned tart. Yeah, beautiful. It's beautiful. I might even put it up on Spotify in the middle of this video.

That's what I'm going to do. And I wrote, yum. I just carried 64KG for one minute. That's my workout. How are we even friends? Lauren wrote, that's more than carrying me. Good news, rear fire. Yeah.

A fire emoji. Yeah. I said there was a study done on women that said the true definition of body strength was to be able to carry your own body weight for one minute so I wanted to check. You went, good to know, I can definitely do 25 kilos, that's Barker. Then she wrote, that was at 9am. Now at 3.21, you wrote,

it'd obviously been playing on your mind what I'd said. You said, I just carried the memorial bench, the bench that we were talking about in last week's show. It arrived. It's just a bench, right? At this point, it's not a memorial bench. It was bought as the memorial bench, but it's not functioning as a memorial bench.

Because he's still alive. The dog is still alive. I just carried the memorial bench from the front garden to back garden. Minimum 40 KG. Now let me tell you something about Lauren. When Lauren says something, you just automatically believe it. Because it's true. You say it was such conviction.

Also, because it's true. We haven't weighed it. You didn't weigh it. Didn't need to. You do in order to clarify whether it is actually 40KG. Carry on. I wrote, I am very impressed. Then I wrote, this is where I think I lost Lauren a bit.

Is it actually 40KG or did you make that up? Because you struggled with the glass. We carried the glass top to her table, her garden table. The other day and she was, oh, oh, oh. Because I was worried about it smashing. Yeah, but there was a lot of huffing and puffing. So I said, because you struggle with the glass, which weighed about half a kilo.

So I'm finding it hard to believe you managed a 40 kilo bench by yourself four days later. or might unnecessarily mean it was unnecessarily mean also true also true I just asked Zach to test Zach is her son

I mean Zach I mean he's not a professional like weyer no but he is someone who goes to the gym and lifts weights all the time so he would know roughly what things weigh

by picking them up roughly as would like you would yeah as would I said nothing he said 40 KG I mean like you know we didn't

We didn't witness it, so it can't be true. You can phone him now. The glass was more fear of it smashing than the weight, but it was at least 8KG. Anyway, my shoulder hurts now. It does. I wrote, it was not 8KG. It was at most too.

We need to weigh everything. It's the only way. Lauren wrote, oh, that sounds like an excellent use of time. So how would you like to weigh the memorial bench and the glass on my table? You want to get some sort of industrial scales in my garden and start weighing everything. We could do that instead of recording shows. I'm very happy that you can lift this bench and lug it around your garden. I'm delighted that you have...

It's really destroyed me. Just saying. Well, because it's really bulky and it would almost destroy anybody because it's a hard thing to carry on the own. Just from the shape of it, it's hard. It's not like you're picking up a kettlebell, which is all in one place. No, I carried it lengthways over one shoulder. So I've got a whopping bruise on my shin and on my hip. from it. It wasn't the best idea. Why did you do that? Wanted it in the garden in place.

Why couldn't I've waited for someone to come home and help me? Couldn't? I reckon five years ago before you met me, you would have waited. Probably, but now I just pick that shit up and carry it myself. I was actually thinking more because my impatience has worn off on you. Oh, I see. I see. Yeah, maybe. Also, just stubborn. Stubborn that you can do it. It's a hot thing to carry around the garden. I've got to be honest. And then I put it down and sat there. Also, I feel like I somehow, in spired you because I said that I picked up 64 kilos and held it for a minute. Yeah.

Which we seemed to have tripped over, which I have to say was quite impressive. But what were you carrying that was 64? I was carrying two 32 kilo kettle bells. I mean, that sounds like hell. For a minute, I wanted to check that I could carry it for a minute. It was so hard. Anyone listening that the trains in the gym, honestly, carry your body weight for one minute. It is really, really difficult.

You have to walk around slowly with it. But also, if there's a fire, you can just drag me. by my feet or my hair. You don't have to actually pick me up. Your hair? Well, just get me out. That would really hurt. It's better than burning to death. I don't think I'd want to... Just drag. Just drag me. You'd have to pick me up. I don't think we need to worry about it. You might. How do you know you don't need to worry about it? Should we go to the first dilemma? I don't even know where this conversation has gone. Like, come on, let's get on to our first dilemma. But we need the disclaimer first. You want to do the

disclaimer? Sure. Go for it. We are not doctors. We are not healthcare professionals. We are not healthcare professionals. We are not golden retriever breeders, sadly. This is just a fun space where we share our thoughts, which could be totally wrong. So if there is an issue that you are seriously struggling with, please contact a qualified expert. Here's our first question.

I'm very, very interested in your response to this. My responses are a bit slow today. I've been up since 20 past five. I'm just saying, I am now drinking a new tropic coffee to try and like perk myself up. Okay? Just saying. It's 10 past It's 112.

Been up for a lot of hours. Basically, it's your evening now. Yeah. Ready for bed. Well, you've got to answer this question first. Okay. I have a 10-year-old daughter, and I've been thinking that when she starts her period,

I might buy her a small piece of jewelry like a necklace to give her to mark her to mark her transition to womanhood. Oh, that's cute. And to take her mind off the fact that she'll have hormonal shit going on for the next 40 years or so. Am I being weird, or is this a nice thing to do? That's her question. well I think I've got two daughters and I think it is a absolutely gorgeous thing to do and I think it is something you should mark. We marked it with both our girls.

Daisy went out for dinner. We were on holiday and I remember that her sister was like messing around. She's like, you're ruining my period dinner. That is amazing. I always told the girls that I would give them a day off school. Yeah. And that we would go shopping for the day. always mark it like that.

Like, because it's a real moment, isn't it? Like, I remember we used to get a slap round the face. I was about to say in, it is, I mean,

it doesn't, in olden times. It doesn't happen now, but it is kind of a Jewish tradition that when you got your period, your mother would slap you around the face because it was such a special moment. It was like you must always remember it.

But that's a horrible way to remember it. Much rather a trip to Westfield. Me too. Coming to mom, I've got my period. Slap. Well, here's a Tiffany necklace. Yeah.

Yeah. It's not done anymore, but it was in days gone by. Yeah. It was a thing, right? Olden days. Yeah. Anyway, so with Daisy, we were actually on holiday. So I would, she would have, I would have totally given her the day off and we would have gone shopping because I just think it's so gorgeous and so sweet. I am with her. I think it's not weird at all. I think it's absolutely gorgeous. I think it's a moment that absolutely should be marked in a young woman's life. And I think they should remember. I mean, I have three sons. So I can't be like, here's a special bracelet for your first wetter. I mean, like, I don't know. What are you supposed to do? What about a shave?

Oh, the first shave. You've got to make it weird. The first shave. Well, anyway. They all had their first shave, but didn't really seem like a celebration moment. It was more like, dude, there's bum fluff going on. You can't walk around like that. Ask your dad to help you shave.

I don't feel that if you had girls, you would be the kind of mum that would do that, though. I would be more like, here's some sanitary towels and some paracetamol. Yeah. Sorry, this is going to happen to you every month. Always keep. You would be very pragmatic. Here's the pouch. Keep it in your bag.

Always have it with you. You never know. Off you go. I've already bought a pack of period knickers and period swimwear. In case this was going to happen this month. I'd be fully prepared. I would have told you all about it and I'd have all the stuff. But I'm not sure how sentimental I would be about it.

No, you wouldn't be sentimental about it. I was also very prepared, by the way. I'm sure you were. They had the pouch in their bag months before it came. Excellent. I was on holiday when mine happened with my dad. Oh. I was at Disney World Florida.

Oh. Let me just say it wasn't a magical moment. It wasn't magical at all. I was sharing a room with my brother. I went to the loo and I was like, oh my God, what on earth. I mean, I knew what it was, but also like, what, this is bad timing. So what did you do? Did you have to tell your dad?

I knocked on the interconnecting door. My dad had brought his girlfriend at the time. She was so sweet. I was like, Laura, I think I've got my period. She was like, should I tell Daddy? I was like, no, no. Like it's shameful in some way. Don't tell dad.

She was like, do you want to ring your mom and tell her? I was like, yeah, I want to. I really want my mom. I really want to ring my mom. My mom was like, oh, I knew it was going to happen while you were on holiday with dad. I'm so annoyed that I'm not there. And then Laura, God bless her, she went down to the hotel gift shop. This was the 90s.

She bought me a Mickey Mouse bum bag. And she filled it with sandwich. towels. What a woman. Isn't that so kind? Let me tell you something about 13 year olds now. If you gave them a Mickey Mouse fun bag. Minnie house fanny pack. Filled with sanitary. Unless the gift is from Sephora, don't bother. Look, it was the 90s. We were in Disney World.

But how kind is that? It's so sweet. I just think it's so gorgeous and there's something still so innocent and young about it. And 13 year olds have become a lot more sophisticated. I was only 12, but I, it was like, I obviously didn't have a handbag and obviously didn't want to walk around with them. So, you know, she just found a way to get around it whilst also looking really on trend. And then, and then she was like, I'm going to tell, I'm going to tell your dad. I think he should know. And then my dad just like looked at me and gave me this very kind of awkward hug of like, well done. But also like, like, you know, it was like, oh God.

What? Yeah. So I also don't think it's weird parenting. I think it's cute. It is cute. And it's such a lovely mark of her going from a child to a woman. Yeah. I mean, are you even a woman?

You're just, women, things are happening to you. So you are, well, physically. Physically. Yeah. Okay. And you're not weird. Don't think you're weird. Don't let anyone tell you you're weird.

It's not weird. It's nice. Lovely. Yeah. And what a lucky young lady to have you as their mum. I tell you what I do think is weird. The women who make necklaces out of their breasts. milk you heard about those you don't know those people i fucking do i was a doler for 16 years i know

if you make a necklace out of breast milk yep they put it in resin and they make like and it's like it's like to commemorate and celebrate their breastfeeding journey and then they wear their own breast milk in a necklace pendant thing okay weird also just to add to that you can do it with semen you can make like a little special necklace or ring with the semen that's special isn't it Would you like one of those? No one does that. No one does that. No one.

Oh, yes, please. It's my anniversary today. I'm hoping that's what I get as my gift. I wish Adam got you a necklace of Simo. Imagine. You're like, well, I've been planning this a really long time. And I know you have the certain years and you have like the certain metals. Well, apparently if you're 18.

18 years is jizz. Frozenberry blast, please. You're on. All right, love. Do you know what I've done? What have you done? Do you see Pete sleeping over there? I've got the sun cream and I've only gone and drawn out.

I love it, really? But that's not Pete. Oh, then help. Oh, very funny. Avoid having the wrong kind of fun in the sun. At spec savers, get two for one, including sunglasses from 100 euro, with single vision lenses to the same prescription. Terms and conditions apply.

See in store for details. So I have a question. Yeah. I want to talk about lip liner. Okay. No, because I'm missing something with lip liner. Talk. Right.

Apparently it's back in. Yep. And I know it's back in because of all the shit reality TV programs I watch, all the young, very trendy cool women are suddenly wearing dark lip liner with a lighter lipstick. That seems to be a thing. And all I can think is, why is your makeup so dated? And then I realize, oh no, no, no, no. It's like the skinny gene thing that I totally fucking miss.

It's not dated. It's come back around. I can't get past it. When did lip liner come back in? I have missed it and I also, I cannot, cannot get on board with it because it looks like they're out of the 1990s. It's not okay.

But the thing is, as they say, if you're old enough to have done it the first time around, you're too old the second time around. So it's fine for us to skip that trend. I've seen it. I wouldn't do it. Good. Because I think it would look real weird.

It's just not right. I can't. And also, because some of the colleagues, Kardashians do it now. So it's definitely a thing. And it probably started with Kylie Jenner's makeup range anyway. I'm sure it did. When did this happen?

Also, I never knew to the point where I read an article that skinny jeans had come back in. Yeah. To the point where, no, but I barely knew they'd gone out. Oh, really? No. No. I saw this article about a year and a half ago that they were coming back. They were making a return.

And at this point, I was thinking I'm still wearing mine. Like, what is going on here? Yeah. So lip liner and skinny jeans, I used to be cool. I used to be like on the front lines of making women look cool and trendy. On the front line. Yeah, the front lines. I used, honestly, I was so ahead of it.

It was always up on the coolest hairstyles hairstyles. I don't reckon I'd know now. But that's okay. Because you don't want to be a 48 year old who's like really. Cool. Not like really cool. Because then you're like Catherine Hahn in the studio where you're in your late 40s. No, she's not cool.

she's tragic. Your burberry bikini top to work. No, it is cool, but also tragic. She's not cool. She's tragic. But that's because she's trying to be so relevant. But she's too old to be that relevant. Okay.

So what you're saying is it's okay that I didn't know the lip liner was back in. Yeah. I also think it's okay that like not to dress like Rihanna when you're 48. I think it's okay not to dress like Rihanna if you're not Rihanna. Yeah, but you can get away with it when you're young. Rihanna? Yeah. When was the last time you saw Rihanna?

This morning. Where? Because she, because she announced her pregnancy at the Mett Gala last night. Oh, I haven't caught up with the Mett Gala stuff yet. Well, I've looked at all the Mek Gala outfits. I looked at Rihanna and I thought, goodness, me, she looks like she's expecting again. Again, again, I didn't know Rihanna had a baby. You see what I mean.

Excuse me, this is the third. Right, well, I didn't know. With Aesap Rocky. I don't know who that is. He's a rapper. It all starts with lip. lineer and now look I don't know about Rihanna's family I don't know who she's married to I don't know anything I've never even heard of him I'm not I'm not you're missing the point I'm not you're missing she also has a makeup brand and I believe she does that with her lip liner fenty and she is very on it right but what I'm saying is I think when you're trying to be relevant at our age it's a bit sad like being relevant is awful you don't want to be relevant you just want to have your own midlife style that suits you otherwise it's a bit try hard

excuse me speak for yourself I would still like to be relevant not not in a 20 year old way or in a lip liner way or in a Kylie Jenner like Fenty Rihanna Burberry bikini top way just relevant in my own lane

in my own way I'll tell you what else is a thing I mean this is so a thing now when you're wearing any like sweatshirt or jumper you have to have a white t-shirt the neck of the white t-shirt peeking out through the sweatshirt or jumper because if you don't that is not cool and now i know

this fact i can no longer wear sweatshirts or jumpers without the perfect white neck t-shirt thing poking out because i feel just like so tragic where did you hear that who told you this oh it was like it's a total style thing how do you wear online online online and then there was a whole article online where i don't know i probably went down a fashion rabbit hole starting from like and when did you find this out? A couple of weeks ago and when did you think of telling me?

So I'm now walking around with jumpers without the white t-shirts Don't looking. Well, don't. It was a bit late. And also you can't wear like, I like a v-neck t-shirt, can't wear that. Oh no, you can't wear it. You can't wear a v-nate.

To the point that my sister's giving me two of her v-neck t-shirts. It's got to be crew now, got to be crew. I don't like crew on me. Because I always have big boobs. It doesn't work. Oh, well, that's the look. So I'm saying you can do tiny relevant tweaks where you don't look like you're 22.

Because anyone can wear a white crew t-shirt. But I'm not saying I want to be 22. I just want to be up to date and what the fuck is going on. Well, that's what's going on. A lot, apparently. A lot. No, if you turned up with some dark lip liner in like a white lipstick, Claudia Winkleman style, I'd be really like,

what's going on here with the face? What's this look? You said to me today what's going on with your face. No, in a good way, I said it. You didn't. You just said. I did. You look different.

I had to ask, do I look different? you're like, what have you, what have you done to your face? I haven't done anything to my face. And you were like, no, no, you look different. Like, you actually asked me if I'd had a tooth removed. I know you said, have you got a toothache? No, it's something around your mouth. Which, correct me if I'm wrong, I didn't think it was a compliment.

But now you're sitting and saying it like it was a fucking compliment. This is what I'm dealing. with everybody. This is what I'm dealing with. This is, this is Lauren's version of a fucking compliment. Have you got a toothache? It's not okay. It's not

okay. And I'm only out finding out now. We had the conversation about an hour ago. I'm only now finding out that you meant it in a good way. And I said to you, well, does my face are worse or better? And you were like, it just looks different.

Yeah. So I said what? Swollen? No. The opposite. Yeah. Why would you think I had a toothache? But those of you not watching the video,

Lauren can't get herself together. I'm crying now. I don't know. You look normal now. I look normal now. So then I went upstairs, my husband's upstairs, and I said, my face are different. He's like, what?

Go away. I'm wrapping your jizz necklace for tonight. Two and five Canadians will hear the words you have cancer. That's why every step and dollar raised matters. On September 19th, join thousands in Toronto for the Princess Margaret Cancer Foundation Walk. Challenge yourself, friends, and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research. Together, we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear of cancer. Register today at pmcf walk.ca.ca.

We get on to our second dilemma. Yes, please. Gather oneself. Gather oneself. My husband at a music festival when we were 30. He was a guitarist and he was pretty cool. Okay. I bet she knows about lip liner.

She might. I don't know how you, why you assume she does? I don't know, because her husband's a guitarist. It's not based on much. I'm just feeling sorry for myself. Okay. He is now 48 and has developed an intense interest in our driveway.

We live opposite a park and apparently people sometimes park a teeny bit over the edge of our drive. I barely notice, but it has become an obsession for him. On the bank holiday weekend, he announced that he's popping out to Home Base. He came back with not one, not two, but four orange traffic cones, a large piece of white MDF and a marker pen. He put the cones across the driveway and he wrote a sign on the MDF saying strictly no parking or traffic enforcement officers will be called. It's like we've got our own little personal road management scheme going on

and I am mortified. He is now talking about getting a camera fitted to note number plates. Who is this man and what happened to my husband? I want to know, right? Is he still playing the guitar? on the drive way. But no, well, because my feeling is he probably isn't and he probably needs to because it sounds like

he needs an outlet. Does it not? Yeah, but you know, men of a certain age, they do get into neighbourhood petty stuff. It becomes a thing. You know what I mean? This guy needs a hobby. He needs a hobby.

Sounds like the driveway is his hobby. It's not a hobby. It's not a good hobby. copy it and I don't think it's working for her. It's definitely not, I would say, doing it for her in an attraction kind of way. No. And also because everyone that's now driving by, he's probably like got his binoculars out, ready to like, rid in the front, right down the number place.

Ready to ridicule them if they park in the wrong place. But you know what? They shouldn't look at the driveway. It is rude. It is rude. You know, I have to say, right, I live on a road. It's a very narrow road. So you can't park too.

cars either side of the pavement because you will block the road. That's how narrow the road is. Now I live right on the corner at the end of the road so it doesn't really affect me so much. But this WhatsApp group goes on all day. Can such and such outside number 44 please move the car? It's been there for two hours and 33 minutes and I can't move. All that shit. What if an ambulance needed to get through?

There's always one of those every day. So there's a lot of people getting very worked up about the fact that they can't get through. So I get it. It is annoying. but also it takes up an enormous amount of energy, doesn't it? It does, but I live in a cul-de-sac, also very narrow, same problem. You can only park on one side of the road. You can't park on both, because no one would get through.

And no one would park on both sides. Some assholes do. And loads of people in my clothes are having building work done. So at the other week, two vans, can I just over my whole life? Loads of people in her clothes. Right, this close, there's about six houses. 17 houses.

17 houses. 17? Yeah. Okay. It's very small. Yeah. So it can't be loads of people having work done. Three of the houses are having full building work,

scaffolding, extensions, everything. Two vans parked, not just block, like not a bit over my drive, but actually fully over the drive so I could not get out. I was trapped. And it happened to three times in the same day. And by the third time, trapped.

I'd lost the plot. So I just went into the house opposite because the door was open. And I was like, is that your van? Yes. I said you are parked directly across my drive wait, I am trapped in my home. Told him you were trapped. And I have to leave my house.

And he came out and he was like, oh, normally I park around the corner and did it. I was like, I am not interested in your parking story. Move your van now. I was so rude. Because I'd had it. I snapped. So I'm kind of feeling this guy. I'm a bit of feeling him.

Do you know what I find amazing about you is you go from this intense people pleaser to like, fuck you. Yeah. Yeah. There is literally no. in between. There really isn't. But by the third time I'd had it, I was like,

it's so rude, I would never dream of parking my van directly across so someone couldn't get out of their own driveway. It's rude. It's thoughtless. It's inconsiderate. It is.

All of those things. So I do understand why this guy has bought the traffic cones. I'm amazed you can buy traffic cones from, where did you go? Homebase. Homebase. Have you ever seen traffic cones at home base?

To be honest, never look for them. I don't know if that's even a thing. I don't even know why I want some, but I do. Do you? Like for no reason. Is this a middle-aged problem? Driveways.

It is a thing. I'll tell you what my husband was doing over the bank holiday weekend and he was very invested in it. Very. And this only happens twice a year. But every year without fail, jet washing the patio. Men love to jet wash the patio. Oh, so he did the other half, did he? He did.

Because the weekend before he'd only done half of the... Yes. And he'd like stacked up all the furniture, hadn't he? Yeah. Hence why we had to do. to move the glass from the table. It was a bit of a half a job, Bob. But the following weekend, he did the other half.

He completed it. Yeah. Well done, Ollie. He loves a jet wash. It's a big thing. I think it's like the power of the water, the noise, the... Testosterone flying around the place. Sounds like you like the jet wash. I try not to be home with the jet wash. Also, Adam splashes all the back doors.

I can't stand it, so then I have to wipe all the back doors. And he always does it when we've got people coming over because you want the patio to look nice. and then you've got to wipe all the doors. Also, there was a terrible accident. My little ladder with all my newly potted flowers from my Friday gardening session, the hose smashed the ladder over.

Loads of my pots got broken. He looked very, very concerned that I was going to be caught. I am not surprised. I just sort of walked out. Was this on the same day as the driveway? No, it wasn't. Anyway, this poor listener is asking us, what about her husband who she's lost and where's he gone?

He's 48. That's where he's gone. she needs to get that guitar out the fucking loft, stick a duster over it and shove it in his hands. I reckon that would solve a lot of problems. I mean, it is a good solution, but also he is 48. Driveway obsessions happen. What do you want me to say?

Sorry, he's 48, it's only going to get worse. Suck it out. Lovely. So she comes here for some support, lovely. It's nice, isn't it? It's not going to get worse. We're all living with it. Giving the guitar.

Giving the guitar. Seriously. or a racket of some sort like he needs a hobby. Buy him a new guitar. Buy him a new guitar. Take him to Denmark Street. Take him to the guitar shop. Say, hey, I know, rather than sitting there.

How do you know where the guitar shop is? I know. I've had dealings with musicians in the past. Okay. Say, hey. You are being so weird today. Can I tell you? She is being so weird.

Am I. Is it very? Is it very? I said to Laura before we came on air, look, my most favourite thing about you is how stable you are. You can't start going off the boil now. It's just we're not going to work if you do that. Are you going to take away my top gun call name? If I, if I had a breakdown. Your top gun call name was steadfast. You're not so steadfast today. Maybe it's just today. Maybe. Maybe it's just the trend. You know what? Now that I come to think of it, it's actually been a few weeks.

Yeah. It's happening. It is, isn't it? You're on the turn. I'm all the time. As Ariela, one of the girls who works in the studio today, she made Lauren a coffee. With off milk. She brought it to Laura. She goes, I don't know what's happened,

but once I put the milk in it, it went a bit funky. We both looked each other like, I'm not going to drink. I think the milk might be off. Have you checked? Well, I don't drink milk. Will you check? So maybe you're just a bit funky today. Yeah.

Maybe today and maybe all the days. Let's sign off. Okay. Let's go. Bye, everybody. Have a great weekend. she's back on Tuesday. I'll do my best to get her back here for our unfiltered.

But we will be back. Just watch this space. If you want to be in touch, hello at 40ish.co.com. We love your emails and everything, all your feedback coming in. So please, please keep emailing us. And we'll be back next week. Bye. Two and five Canadians will hear the words, you have cancer.

That's why every step and dollar raised matters. On September 19th, join thousands in Toronto for the Princess Margaret Cancer Foundation Wall. Challenge yourself, friends, and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research. Together, we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear of cancer. Register today at pmcfwalk.ca.ca.cwock.ca.