40ish - Piercings, Tantrums and Nothing says I love you like a Dustbuster.

Episode Date: November 13, 2025

This week on 40ish Lauren's husband romances her with a new DustBuster. (Nothing says I love you like Dyson) whilst Nicole is radiating extra bougie energy as she lights up a 3 wick high end candle. (Then has an almighty adult tantrum). A listener doesn't know what to make of her 53yr old husband suddenly arriving home with an ear piercing (Midlife crisis or David Beckham tribute?)  and another woman has had it with trying to arrange a Christmas Day that everyone is happy with. Oh, and did we mention Lauren is talking to her appliances now? Send help. We love to hear from you! To share your feedback, dilemmas, rants, funny stories or general complaints about midlife please be in touch at: Email [e-mail] Instagram https://www.instagram.com/40ish.podcast  TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@40ish.podcast Facebook  https://www.facebook.com/share/DVQWb6y2vesgeHEK/?mibextid=LQQJ4d  To order our book HAVE YOU TRIED THIS?” click here  https://www.amazon.co.uk/Have-You-Tried-This-Only/dp/1801293139/ref=sr_1_2?crid=1O7EA4ZF1O5CS&keywords=have+you+tried+this&qid=1699449028&sprefix=have+you+tried+%2Caps%2C125&sr=8-2 This episode is sponsored by London Nootropics Get 20% off at LondonNootropics.com with the code 40ISH Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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I phoned you hours later. Yeah, hours later. You were still in quite a bad mood. But it had lost a lot of its, like, momentum at this point. It was just like the residue. It wasn't as activated. That's what he... Thanks.

He'd Gina Ford did you. Thanks. Thanks. Thanks. He said, and I quote, I just fancied to change. The kids are mortified, and every time I look at it, I laugh. Hello everybody. Welcome to 40ish. I'm Nicole Goodman.

And I'm Lauren Mishcom. This is the podcast where we tackle the joy and wonder and beauty of midlife. You try and change it every week. I appreciate that. You're welcome. I appreciate the effort. You are welcome. Every week we dive into all things about being middle-aged, mid-life, your news, the news. news, your stories, our stories, dilemmas, rants, moaning, bitching, complaining, the lot. That's it, yeah. All of the sexy stuff that comes with being middle-aged.

Please don't forget that you can subscribe on Apple Podcasts for early access, ad-free listening across both this show and Self-Care Club, which is also a wonderful podcast, and bonus content. And you can even watch us on Spotify. And if you've got something to share big or small, we want to hear it all. That rhymes. Well done. Thank you.

We want you to be part of the conversation. The show is what it is because of you and you writing into us. And you can write into us hello at 40ish.com. Dot co.com. Yeah. How has your week been, Nicole Goodman? I did something quite empowering at the weekend. Did you?

I did. I did. I had people for dinner. Yeah. And I wanted to make it all sort of nice and candlelit. And I was going through all my candles. And I found right at the back this neon candle. that my friend bought me, I think, going on three years ago.

It's a three-wick neon candle. It's beautiful and it's in the box, right? So I'm getting all the candles out and I'm picking them in the bathroom and I'm picking the hallway and I'm picking them on the table. Anyway, I left that one. And about two hours later, I thought, you know what, Nicole? You know what? That candle that sits in the cupboard has been sitting in the cupboard for three years.

You need to light that candle. What are you saving it for? What am I saving it for? Saving it for best. But it was best. But also the point of a candle, it's no use if it's not lit. And it's no use in the cupboard. No.

There where no one can see it and no one can enjoy it. And it has been not enjoyed or not seen for three years. What is that? I have to say, neon candles, even the single wick, of which I have one on my living room table that a ex-dealer client bought me, I also left that unlit for years. And then I was like, no, this is enough. it's mine and it was a gift and I'm lighting it why am I keeping it? But three wicks three wick candle. Bougy as fuck. Boogey.

Wow. Bougie. Yeah I mean those things are not cheap. And well and they're gorgeous and it's smelt. Oh so I lit it in my bathroom and it's still there and you know what? I got so much joy from lighting that candle. Good. And that's when I thought you know an 18 year old wouldn't get joy from this.

This is only a middle age thing. And only a middle-aged woman would understand the joy that is coming from lighting this candle that has been sat in the cupboard for three years. I'm really glad you did that. And also, when you do have a proper nice candle like that, you do realize that the Aldi ones, as cheap as they are, they just don't smell the same. But no candles smell the same unless it's neon or diphtique. Or Joe Malone. Like a really beautiful candle. I mean, I do think they're overpriced. Ridiculously overpriced. But getting it as a gift, yeah, dreamy. a nice gift.

Only if you light it. Yeah. True. I just bought my friend one for her birthday. I bought her a dipteak one. That is so generous. She was like, this is the nicest present. And I said, do you know why I bought it for you?

Because you don't buy this stuff for yourself. Like, no one would buy that for themselves and just light it. So just put it on your desk while you're doing your writing. Light it. Enjoy it. I remember going to pick Lily Rose up from a girl from school. And I walked in and she had a dip. critique like a five-wick, you know, the biggest ones.

Oh, I'm sorry, that is. In at the hallway on like a random Tuesday afternoon of a half-term, lit. And I thought, this, this is how to live. Yeah. Come on, what's going on with you? Well, there was a moment of true romance in my household that you were lucky enough to witness. weren't you? I was.

It was very sweet. So my beloved and much used dust buster, well, it passed away. I'm so sorry. Thank you. Thank you. How is everyone coping? Listen, it was a sad moment. It's been part of my household for a long time and I loved it.

And we were together every morning. Sucking up shit from the kitchen floor. We sucked face together. We really did. Anyway, it had been terminal for a while. I knew it was coming. Right. And then last week...

But you still can't prepare, can you? I can't prepare for that kind of loss. You just can't. You think you can. And you think you can get yourself into a state of acceptance. But it's still hard. It was hard.

And that moment when I just had to put it in the black bin outside, it was sad. It was sad for everyone. Was it sad for everyone? I'm sure it was a savvy of kids. Just sad for me. I sent it on its way with love. Anyway, Ollie came home and I said,

Ollie, I've got really, really bad news. Well, he actually, he came home for lunch. We had lunch with him. Well, he phoned to say, At home, yes. What are you doing? I'm working with Nicole. We're about to have lunch. Oh, he said quite sadly. I was going to have lunch. I'm around the corner. But I won't. I won't disturb you. And I'd made like quite a nice salad. Oh, you'd made an amazing salad. But I didn't tell him that. But you always make a nice something. Then I get a little text saying, I couldn't resist

your food. I'm coming home. I don't blame him. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. than your gorgeous salad. Then he came home and apologised for being at home. Yes. For eating in his own house at his own kitchen table. And then I shared the news. I'm really sorry I've got bad news, but the dust buster's gone. It's dead.

And I said, you know what? I am going to give you the power to choose the new one. I don't know why you did that. Because I just wanted him to buy it. So I didn't have to spend 80 quid on it. That's why. 80 quid, you'd be lucky. You'd be lucky if he spent 80 quid on it.

And also I knew if I bigged him up. I see, so it was me that planted the seed because when you were discussing it over the lunch I said, oh, you want to get the Dyson and he was like, oh no, no, no, you don't want the Dyson. I said, no, no, you do. He goes, but that's like a mini hoover. I'm like, well, exactly. I've done my research and I said, I want the Black and Decker. This is

the one that's the same as ours, it's Black and Decker, here it is. And I've done all that, but you know what? You decide, you decide, and I could see he quite enjoyed that little, anyway. A few days later, a big box arrives at the front door. with my nickname on the front so i know it's from ollie to me sweet so sweet sweet and inside is a

brand new dyson dustbuster you're welcome thanks you are welcome it's really nice would you have got the dyson do you think if i hadn't planted that seed i don't think so because i was pushing strongly for the black and deca why well because it's what i've always had and it's what i've always known it's what i feel comfortable with but we're getting back to the three-wit candle now aren't we like go go for Go for the, like, go for more, expect more, want for more. Why are you limiting yourself with your dustbuster? I got more, I got more, and I texted him. And I said, I sent him a picture of it opened.

And I said, this is true love. And he said, you deserve it. It has more meaning than a Tiffany ring that doesn't fit because he did buy me a ring from Tiffany's in America that didn't fit. And it was a problem because we couldn't take it back. also more useful and almost as expensive and then he said it'll last longer than me

you can use it at my funeral before and after that's actually not funny I know I was like how much better are you planning on making before and after you die for God's sake anyway but people come back for bridge rolls don't they yeah I think that's what you meant

I know yeah that's exactly what he meant anyway but that's not going to happen because I saw him in the gym this morning he's still very lively. Do you think he'll outlast the Black and Decker Dasper? I hope so. Yeah. Dyson.

Yeah. Oh, did I say Black and Decker is Dyson? Yeah, it's a Dyson. See, I can't cope with the, with how Flash it is. By this point, we should be sponsored by Dyson and by Ninja. Yeah, definitely by Ninja. Because you've got every contraption Ninja has to make. Yeah.

I really do. We should be on that. I tried. I did message. Ninja, they completely blanked us. Oh. Bastards. Do you want to hear some feedback?

Very early in the show for feedback, but let's do it. Let's do it. Rachel sent a message. My heated blanket from Costco is one of my best Christmas presents ever. I'm only 29 and totally owning it. I mean, I mean, Rachel. I don't know how I feel about that, Rachel. Me neither.

I also wanted to say that so often you are both saving lives in inverted commas in a totally different way to being a doctor job. But just take my word for it. It's just as important. Keep doing what you're doing, ladies. You are the best. Love Rachel. That is so gorgeous.

Get out from under the blanket, Rachel, and start living. You're 29. There's plenty of time for blankets when you're 47. Please, I beg of you. If I was 29. I was just thinking about what you just said There's plenty of time for blankets of 47 I'm sorry, I think that's incorrect

You should say there's plenty of time for blankets 87? Yeah, 77 What age am I allowed to be under the blanket Watching strictly, happy as anything? What age? Well, I mean In the spirit of the three-wit candle

You can do it whenever you like Thanks In the spirit of upgrading your dust buster From a Black and Decker to a Dyson you can do whatever you like want for more push for more I mean I would say

get the fucking heated blanket if you're under the blanket make sure it's a heated one listen it's already in my Amazon basket I just haven't checked it out yet is it I think it's heavy but it's heavy yeah but I'm waiting for it to get cold because it's still quite warm

oh you know we can get out soon the weighted blankets yeah I've got two of those lovers in my cupboard They're 10 kilograms each. I know. They're heavy. My daughter loves a weight of blanket.

Does she? I must get it out for her, yeah. I feel like I've got so many. We had also a reply from Maya. She said, it is truly possible that was your funniest episode. She's talking about the last Thursday's episode. What would we're talking about? Skips, I remember.

Skips. Yeah, skips. Yeah, skip. And the past life regression woman. Yeah, and how, you know, I had an existential moment where I realized what I do for a living is quite silly and if Ollie had to talk about me rapping on TikTok

and why I'd be a doctor's receptionist that episode what does your wife do? Oh here she is rapping with him another middle age woman during the lunch the dust buster conversation lunch we showed him

us wrapping on TikTok he didn't mind watching the beginning bit when I was doing it but he can't cope when you're doing it couldn't cope at all he was so funny couldn't cope could he Why? It was so funny. He actually had to leave the table. It gives him the ick, doesn't it?

Yeah, it gives him the right ick. It's okay. It's okay. We can compartmentalise these things. It's fine. I don't mind. You know what? If Adam was doing it, it would also give me the ick.

But you'd still watch it. You'd obsessive. I actually don't think I would. Would you not? If he was rapping on TikTok. I would. If Ollie was wrapping on TikTok, I would be watching that on a loop. I'd just have to.

I'd be like I couldn't take my eyes off it. I'd have to watch it. obsessively. I'd love to see Olly rapping on seeing him. We're laughing because you have to know Oli to know how unlikely that is. He's,

you know, he has a serious job. Yeah, he does have a serious job. Maya said truly possible that was the funniest episode and just to justify what you ladies do for a living,

you keep me sane and happy and my family safe so you do save lives. Have a lovely weekend, Maya. I don't think I keep my family safe. I had such a shit fit yesterday. the ship fit then finished because it was the amount of times

that I had to clean the kitchen I'll be back to the kitchen counters again well you think it's ended it ends with death like the laundry I just couldn't I just couldn't and you know you just hit a fucking wall with it and then my husband was upstairs

laying down sending me memes whilst I was cleaning the kitchen doing the washing feeding the dog getting fucked off with everybody. Were they good memes, though? Were they quality memes? Were they shit ones?

Is that a serious question? Yeah, yeah. I want to know what kind of meme sender he is. No, no, no, you're missing the point. The point is he's lying down on the bed. Sending me memes whilst I'm cleaning the house for the 18th time that morning, right? I don't know because I actually refused to watch them.

And the shit fit ended like this with me saying, if you send me one more fucking meme I'm gonna smash it and then I stormed out with the dog with the dog and then I bumped into my friend

she happened to be driving past and she said oh I'll stop and I thought you don't want to stop anyway she stopped she walked with me I mean by the end of it she was like practically deaf with all my moaning I'm so glad she got to you before me she just basically took

she was like the buffer that was great she was the total yeah I phoned you hours later yeah hours later you were still in quite a bad mood but it had lost a lot of its like momentum at this point it was just like the residue it wasn't as activated because I was tired

yeah that's how it sounded it was like I have been in a bad and I'm still in a bad mood but there's no energy behind it now because I've exhausted myself with my tantrum after I spoke you I was just think I was driving anyway I got home and then I started replaying the whole if you sent me one more fucking meme. It was like, that could have been a meme in itself. It could. I just thought, I can't even really

remember why I was so angry now. Oh my gosh. to use in it. Okay, picture this. Someone paste the Q4 strategy doc and client list into a free AI tool and it's no longer yours. Harmonic security warns people before they paste in sensitive data so you can say yes to Gen AI and still protect what matters most. Visit harmonic.security before your cram jewels end up in a chat bot. It's the Nissan Black Friday event where you can, wait, wait. Isn't it like a month long now? Nissan Blackfri month? Does that work? It's the Nissan Black Fry Month event.

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about. And then later he did say to me he didn't speak to me for hours. He completely... He was probably too scared to. He was, he, I have to say, he dealt with it like an absolute pro and a champ. And he said to me, you're all right now?

Like, I am all right now. And he said, do you want to hug? I said, I actually do what I could do with a hug. Yes, thank you. And he said, did you notice that I just completely ignored you. And I said, yes, I did know it. And I feel myself getting riled up again. And then I just looked at him and I said, I think that was best. What he's basically doing is the Gina Ford method on you, which I like. He's treating you like a toddler. Just ignore it. Let it

play itself out. Don't give it attention. You know, like when your toddler throws himself on the floor and you just turn your back and completely ignore it because they're only doing it for the attention. And then when you stop looking at them, they stand up and stop crying. It's a bit like that. That's what he thinks. He jean afforded you. Thanks. Thanks. I think it was the right move on his part, actually.

Don't you? Because he would only have given it oxygen if he'd carried on. Imagine if he'd said you a meme of like... I said to you, I said to you that he handled it like a pro. He really did. And like a fucking champ, he did. I acknowledge that. Don't make me have to acknowledge it for a third time.

Because also he still hadn't cleaned up the kitchen. And then he said to me later when he was feeling really brave and he knew I was very calm because I had housewives on so he knew that everything's okay if housewives were on and he said

did you watch the meme so if there's a lot. We're not doctors or healthcare professionals so if there's an issue you are seriously struggling with please contact a qualified expert Hi Nicole and Lauren. My 53-year-old husband has just got his ear pierced. He works in insurance and the most rebellious thing he's done in the last decade is forget to recycle. Anyway, last weekend he came home with a diamond stud out of nowhere, no warning. He said, and I quote, I just fancied to change. The kids are mortified and every time I look at it, I laugh.

Shall I support or just ignore this As harmless self-expression Or tell him how I really feel Which is that I think it's a bit of a tragic midlife crisis I actually think There are many worse ways he can go With a tragic midlife crisis Agreed

He could have gone with a tattoo Which is permanent The earing you could take out Motorbike A fair Yep weird new haircut yeah

like something like hair plugs hair plugs or like some weird new hobby turkey teeth what turkey teeth what a turkey teeth

when they go to turkey and come back with those like fluorescent blue white teeth like Ryland has turkey teeth did he get his in turkey everyone gets them in turkey it's cheap

it's where they call turkey teeth is it cheap yeah because I'm getting a lot of dental work at the moment or plastic surgery is cheap in turkey but then sometimes you die So that's the price you pay. No.

Well, those women who have the Brazilian butt lifts and then they die. I do not get a Brazilian butt lift. I don't understand it. Of course that we don't get it because we're the generation we're having a big bum. No, no. No, I disagree with that. I don't mind a big bum. I actually really appreciate a big bum and I like a juicy lifted bum.

I'm talking about now. I've moved on from the 80s. But it was intrinsically drilled into us as 80s. girls, no one wants a big bum. Hence, does my bum look big in this? Blah, blah, blah. Now, everyone wants her fucking massive fat ass. Everyone, I don't. That's not what I don't get. What don't you get? What I don't get? I understand the concept of a nice, juicy, rounded bottom. I spend my life trying to achieve it. I don't understand it at all. It gives you a lovely curve. It's gorgeous. So feminine. Not for me.

I can't bear a flat bottom. I can't bear it. I'm sorry. A flat when someone is flat at the back it's not right sometimes you just are flat no i know but you can work on it not being flat okay what i don't understand is the brazilian buttlift because it always looks like someone has literally just shoved in like two footballs into your ass that's what it looks like i remember being at the airport this summer and there was a girl standing in the queue at check customs checkin passport control whatever and she was in a track suit and i just i was excited with her bum because it was so disproportionately wrong and weird. But it always looks weird.

And I kept saying to Oli, look at her palm, look at her bum, what's wrong with her? What's wrong with her? And I was like, oh, she's had a BBL. Right. I mean, has Adam ever had his ears pierced? Yeah, when he was much younger, before he knew me. Yeah, Olly as well. I know that seems hard to believe.

He actually has like four holes up one ear. Does he? He always used to get his earpillar earrings. He used to get them pierced and then he'd have to go back to school. and obviously you weren't allowed to wear them pierced at school so you'd have to take it out so you'd have to get it re-pierced in the holidays so he's actually got four holes at one ear

long before I knew him and he did used to wear a dangly earring and I'm like... No, he did not. He did. No, he did not. He did. And I... He... Because it was a George Michael kind of look. It was the 90s. It wasn't, it was the 80s when he had them

and I did say to him, I'm not sure how I would have felt if I'd met you with dangly earrings. I don't think that would have been a vibe for me. If he got it Pierce now and came home with a diamond stud, I'd be very, very worried. I'd be very worried. He would. He just, he's very conventional, Olly. Yeah.

He wouldn't. It's not for him. Adam, I mean, I can't see Adam with a diamond stud now, but also if he did have one, I don't think I'd be so weirded out by it. Well, because he's in a bit more, he's in a more creative industry and. But I don't think I'd like it on Adam.

You know what I mean? I shall tell him. I don't feel like it's a look. You know what? I'm very happy with how he looks. It would just stay as he is. One of my sons, my middle son, who's 19, has, wears one diamond stud and his left ear. Oh, okay.

But he's 19. Yeah. And I actually took him to get it done. I was like, if we were going to get it done, we're going somewhere nice and clean and safe and I'll take you and pay for it. So he did that. But my other boys, no, it's not for them. But he's a footballer. So it's kind of a footballer, right, passage, isn't it?

He's 19. He's cool. He's into his fashion. Like, it works for him. And I'm actually. completely fine with it. On a 53-year-old who's done it with no warning, and if he came home, I also would laugh. I think I would laugh, which probably isn't the response he wants, because he's probably feeling a bit middle-aged, old, and just wants to feel a bit cool.

He's trying to give himself an edge, isn't he? Yeah. He should grow a beard. Totally. Everyone should grow a beard, not women. No. No, not women. All men should grow a beard. All men? Yeah. All men are improved with a beard. I try to think. Of any man I've seen that when he grows a beard, he looks worse, but I really can't. I don't think there's any man who is not improved with a beard. I love a beard. I love a beard. I'm all over a beard. Actually, I don't think I'd like a beard on James.

James does sometimes grow a beard. I don't like his beard. I do. I like a beard on everyone. I only don't like a beard on a woman. I don't think she should tell him how she really feels about this. But I think it's clear if she keeps laughing at him that he probably knows how she feels about it. I actually think what she should do is pull him to the side and say, is everything okay? What can I do to make you feel a bit more sexy and young? And he's just obviously

feeling like he's lost his edge. But if he is into it, let it go. It's one earring. There is so much worse that he could do. So much worse. Let it go. It's not biggie. Do you agree? I completely agree. But also, it's not on my husband. So it's easier to say that. Give me event meltdown. I feel like I've done mine early. I have got another one. Not quite as fun, but... I don't know if this is just me.

I feel like it's not just me. But I have reached an age where I now very regularly talk to my kitchen appliances. A whole chat. And I know that you're going to say you always talk to yourself and you're always talking Me? I don't. I don't talk to myself. No, no. You always say to me that I talk to myself. You do talk to yourself. So I feel like you mutter. You mutter. I know. It's not okay. However this story is going, it's not okay. I feel like you're going to say to me this is no surprise because you talk to yourself anyway. But I, what's happening basically is, what's happening is, the dryer. The tumble dryer has answered me back. go. It's like refusing to dry a lot of things. It will only dry

a small amount of things. And if you put a large amount of things in it, bo-be-be-be-be-be-be-be. I don't want this much and you have to take half of it out and I'll only dry half at a time. And I don't know why it's doing this to me. It's really annoying. So, you know, you take a load out of the washing machine, you put it in the dryer.

No, I'm only allowed to put half of it in the dryer. Anyway, if you check the filters. Yes, I'd clean them, I'd check them, I empty them. I am so on it with that dry. I look after it like it is one of my, like I gave birth to it. I tend to that dryer. I wouldn't surprise me if you had. And it is giving me jip. Anyway, Josh wasn't feeling well on Friday. And I forgot to call the school to say that he wasn't going in. I just completely forgot. And I'm doing the laundry in the laundry room at half past nine. And I get a text from the school, an automated text to say, please state the reason why your child is not in school. today and I was like oh god this hasn't happened before so I'm busy doing everything so I voice

note I dictate the reply to say sorry I didn't phone earlier he's got a headache and he's got a sore throat and he's feeling very under the weather blah blah blah blah blah and because I'm also doing the laundry I I typed I voice noted why are you being such a selfish bastard Because I thought I'd finish the message, but I hadn't. Did you send it? So that's what it said. That's what it said. Sorry, Josh isn't, it's good today.

And I'm sorry I forgot to call me. He's got a headache and a sore throat. Why you being such a selfish bastard? Because I'd screamed at the machine. Why? Why are you just selfish? And I thought, this isn't good. This isn't good.

No, no. It's good that you've caught it. and also now the school think I'm fucking mad or maybe they thought I was talking to Josh maybe they think now I'm a terrible mother well yesterday after my whole meltdown and I went to walk the dog I bumped into my neighbour and it was like you're right and I'm thinking did you hear me

I mean he lives on the other side but it was possible so loud and he's like I don't know he had like this look like he knew something, but he didn't know something. Obviously he didn't know. I was totally paranoid. But I'm thinking like, I reckon you fear slash pity, both. All of it. Yeah. And then just paranoia coming off of me, you know. And I'm thinking, did you hear me? Because if you did, I'll just, I don't even know how to excuse myself. You can't. You can't. Like, you can't. Like, you can't. Nothing.

Because even if you say to the school, oh, I'm so sorry. I was talking to my tumble dryer. And it's like, oh my God, call social services. She's, she's unwell. Either she's like abusive to the child or the tumble dry or she's talking to appliances Yeah But listen If you are out there

And you also talk to your household appliances Please don't Get in touch Please let us know I don't want to feel alone I know you don't I can't I can't join you on this

I don't speak to my appliances Don't You don't have any chats with them Ever No and I did have a whole thing With the the ice thing In my fridge How'd you know

Because it was always on the blink I got a new one No, we've got a new fridge freezer. Anyway, I fucked it up. Okay. Oh. It doesn't matter. It's a really boring story, but I wasn't, the point is I wasn't talking to it.

Oh, okay. It is just me then. Hmm. Okay. I'm calling that a meltdown, a personal meltdown. I also think you might need a new dryer. I thought you could say I might need a psychiatrist. Had that.

What is your meltdown? Well, it's a mini one because I think I've given you mine. I mean, that actually was a full-blown tantrum. But this is more of a query. Mm, okay. They are advertising, Landman is back. Yes, I read a whole article about it this very morning. November 14th, I believe, the new series comes out.

You didn't watch the first series. Why are you so interested? Halfway through. Well, because Ollie binged cheated on me with the rest of the series and I haven't yet caught up. Series two, yes. I saw the posters right on a bus and it's got Billy Bob Thornton yeah Demi Moore yeah who's the third person probably the wife the ex-wife no it wasn't the ex-wife uh I don't know anyway the point is the third person was not John Hamm well you said

he was dead well it looked like he was dead if it looked like he was dead he was probably dead well you don't know you don't know you don't know I don't know No, because I haven't seen that episode. I haven't seen that episode. But it looked like he was dead. But he couldn't, could have not been dead because he's also John Hamm and why are you going to kill John Hamm off and leave Demi Moore a widow because actually what you really want to see is John Hamm and Demi Moore.

Together. I mean, that's just epic. I mean, you just didn't see her. No, you didn't see her. So, so there's that. Yeah. And also, he's not in the morning show. I'm now on episode eight.

He's not in the morning show. He made a cameo, a cameo. A cameo. He looked great though. I can't. I can't with the cameo. But you could just watch that episode again. He did look great in the morning show.

He looked so great and so hot and so smouldering. Yeah, I know. I can't with him. Anyway, so he's not on the post of Landman. He's not in the morning show. Is he not in Landman? Like, where is he? Where is John Hamm?

And is he getting fired from all these shows? Is he a nightmare to work with what's going on? Why does he keep getting killed? build off. That's a very valid question. I would be Googling what's John Ham's next project so you can get ahead of that. But also like why aren't you bringing him back? He's a

massive actor. He brings eyeballs to your shows. Do you know what I'm going to manifest for you and me because I really feel like this could happen? I am going to manifest that he comes to London and does a West End play and we're going to go and see that shit. And then we're going to go to the stage door

and we'll stay there until 2am if we have to. We're going to. I just have a good feeling that's going to happen. I don't know why. Maybe that is our 2026 manifestation. Yeah. Really? Yeah.

That's where we're going to put all of our law of attraction. Or just a bit of it, yeah. Oh, come. Oh, wouldn't you be happy with that? Wouldn't you be all over that? I would be all over that. But also, if you're going to manifest seeing John Hamm live, wouldn't it be like having dinner with him?

I don't think you'd cope with having dinner with him. him to be honest. I wouldn't cope. You're right. You're right. You are right. I wouldn't. Would you cope? I'd have to have a lot to drink before I could cope. Because all I'd be doing would be looking at you and mouthing at you, oh my God, it's John Hamm. I think I would just dribble. I would just be like really not cool. I think I'd like have to like touch him and and you can't touch him. I would just say this is my friend Nicole. She's an elective mute. Yeah. She don't worry about her she can cope very well in the real world normally but not when it comes to you i think he'd be very uncomfortable with the two of us at a table just basically staring at him and trying not to

touch him we're not the only women in the whole world that have ever stared at john ham come on no i'm sure we're not anyway haven't we got better things to manifest not right now you know what i'm trying to get my daughter into drama school i shouldn't be manifesting that i'd like a dryer that works i could manifest that or i could just call british gas to sort of I actually think that you should listen to a podcast on manifestation. Amanda.

Amanda has written in. Hi ladies, please let me vent. I mean, we can, right? Because we have vented today. I wanted to get organised for Christmas because I host it for the 16 members of my family. I said on the family, group a few weeks ago let's just make a plan early this year but by friday last week i was knee deep

in a family WhatsApp thread that could be used as an sas psychological endurance test oh dear my mom wants christmas lunch at 2 p.m sharp because it's tradition my sister says that she and her kids can get there only after three o'clock because they do brunch. That's too late. That's too late. That's too late. My brother said he'll swing by at some point with his wife and their three kids which could mean anything. Well, that's, what do I do about the turkey and the roast potatoes? It's an extra five people like, that's not going to work. Yep. I have suggested a Christmas dinner, actual dinner at 6pm, to try and make everybody happy.

Yeah. But my in-laws are staying with us, which means I'll have to hang out with them all day with no meal until the evening. That is a bit awkward, because then how do you feel the whole of Christmas Day until 6 o'clock when you haven't got like Christmas lunch? But then you'd have to do a lunch. So now you're doing lunch and a dinner. That's not fair. No. My dad, who doesn't cook or help, but still somehow has lots.

of opinions declared that eating late isn't good for digestion and my grandma who is 88 won't be happy with that my husband has said what if we do more of a buffet style thing so timing doesn't matter and my mum looked at him like he was mad I just want my family to in capital letters be normal and please pick a time like normal human beings this is normal this is normal I'm really sorry but if she's hosting it she should just be choosing the time I say do it at 3 o'clock Do a really late lunch Therefore you don't have to do a dinner

You don't have to do a lunch They can do the brunch Just And that's it Agreed And I would say You are invited at 3 Christmas lunch will be served at

4 Wouldn't they Because you've got to have your champagne And your canates So they come at 2 Christmas lunches served at 3 If you're not here If you're not coming for 3

Let me know And I won't cater for you And I'll see you at 6 o'clock For the Quality Street And James is shouting Who is he shouting out? I don't know

You know, I came in this morning You'll love this listeners And I said to him You smell nice And he just walked on He completely ignored me And then I said, what after shave are you wearing And then he actually said

Is she still talking to me? I said, would you mean still I haven't even said hello yet? I know I mean, lucky he didn't see me yesterday Lucky for everyone Well, I think it's mainly lucky for James My God

Can you imagine? No, I would have hidden under a desk Because he would have come but he wouldn't have ignored me. He would not have ignored you or sent you fun memes. For sure. I'm trying to hear what you're saying.

I am too. He's having a little bit of a podcast rant about someone else. All I can hear is the word subscribe and YouTube. And money and money. That's what I can hear. Oh, James. James is giving Big Boss energy this morning.

He is. Yeah. He is. That is exactly what he's giving. He's giving podcast. I actually called him a fucker before we started recording. That's how professional... I said, why are you being such a fucker?

It's how professional we are here, right? Yeah. Okay. Should we go? Yeah. Let's go. Let's go and spy on the system. I mean, do you think he realizes that he has a podcast studio and he needs to be quiet?

What? And then we're recording next door. Yeah. Let's go in an earwig on his phone call. Okay. Let's do that. Bye.