40ish - Sienna Miller, Emotional Affairs & Marriage Red Flags

Episode Date: May 26, 2026

Today on 40ish: Lauren and Nicole win a comedy award and celebrate in true 40ish style - by having a yogurt and an apple on the way home. Huge congratulations to Sienna Miller who has welcomed her third child. We discuss her comments about not caring what anyone thinks anymore, and why society still acts like women over 40 getting pregnant is breaking news while men are out here having babies during their free bus pass years. The listener's dilemma is from a woman whose husband started “getting into running” and may now be training for an emotional marathon with a divorced woman from the school gates. Evening jogs have turned into post-run Diet Cokes by the beach and suddenly our listener is spiralling. Is she overthinking? Is he being shady? We unpack trust and intuition. Plus, the midlife meltdowns return featuring a broken dryer and the reappearance of the tarty shoes. Yes, those shoes. Still causing problems. If you enjoy the episode, share it with a friend who also has trust issues, questionable footwear or a laundry appliance hanging on by a thread.Come see us hosting in the Menopause tent at the Everywoman Festival on June 13th https://www.everywomanfest.com/tickets-londonBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/40ish-laughing-our-way-through-midlife-perimenopause-menopause--6942825/support.We love to hear from you! Get in touch with your dilemmas and rants.DM & follow us on Instagram   TikTokOrder Our Book here

My vagina's great, but I'm really mummassy now. What's happened is I've got rid of all of these problems with this and that and the other, and I'm now in full menopause, but I'm really mumsy. I once went to... No, come on! Come on. I once went to an all-night diner. It used to be open in town.

It was in, like, the King's Road. And I once went, I do not know what they talk about running for five miles. I feel a bit paranoid, but I don't want to be controlling or not. micro manage his life. I feel stuck between wondering if I'm overreacting because of my past trust issues or whether my instincts are picking up on something real. It's never given me a reason not to trust him before, but the secrecy and defensiveness around this friendship feels off to me. Hello everybody. Welcome to 40-ish. I'm Nicole Goodman. And I'm Lauren Mishkon. This is the podcast tackling 40-something life every week diving into midlife stuff, news, stories, dilemmas and our own

things that are happening to you and to me and to everyone. I don't know where that came from. Stop it. You're like in merch today. Yeah, fully merged up. We should do merch for 40-ish. You know what? This isn't even merch because this is a one-off.

So it's not, you can't even buy it. You can actually. Can you? Yeah. On our merch on Spread Shop. Can you? Yeah. Maybe I should get a new one.

I think we should get some 40-ish merch. We should. Would you like some 40-ish merch? We should get some for our live show. It should say Quazas on it. Quazers! It should say feeling quasi. Yeah. On the back. Yeah. Or the front. Or on both boobs. Quazas. Tell us what you want on the merch and we'll get some for our live show. Do you want some mugs? Do you want some hats? Do you want some t-shirts? Hats. Hats. There are things you wear in your head.

I know what they are. They don't want that. Well, they can tell us what they want. Yeah. Okay. Tell us what you want. Tell us what you want because we're doing a live show on July the 5th in London. Yeah, we are. In town? In London. At west. In the west end, in it?

In the West End, in it? In Soho. Yeah. And it's from 4pm till 6pm. Yeah, tickets are not quite live, but we will promise to link to them when they are. But absolutely diarise that show because we do not want to be sat there on our own. Well, I mean, we'll be fine on our own, but it'll be a bit weird. And expensive.

Yeah. It's a really expensive way to hang out. we could just do it for free in our kitchens right on the phone I mean we could do a lot of way we could hang out in a lot of ways that we don't need to hire a theatre in London's West End

no we made this joke the other day so let's not repeat but anyway please come to the live show we'll get merch maybe we'll get some books oh yeah oh yeah we wrote a book

remember that yeah I do bring our book there Hi Quazas, just jumping in here very quickly to let you know that the venue had double booked for the 5th of July. So we are definitely doing a live show at the beginning of July. It probably won't be on the 5th, but it will be maybe that week or a few days before. It will definitely be London-based. We're thinking probably North London.

So just keep a listen out for more updates. So any time you hear us talking about the 5th of July. lie, just know that post-record, the venue got back to us and told us that they had booked someone else. Annoying. Anyway, just to let you know, the live show is going ahead. We will confirm dates and place and time, ASAP. Thank you.

Don't forget that you can subscribe on Apple Podcasts where you get early access for this show and self-care club and you get ad-free listening across both of those shows too. And you can watch the video every week on Spotify and on YouTube. And if you've got something to share, please make sure you share it with us. We want to hear everything. So email us, hello at 40-ish.com.com. Come and be part of the conversation. The show would not be what it is without you.

And the last piece of housekeeping is please press the subscribe or follow button on wherever you are listening. And if you love this show and you think someone else would love it too, please do share it with all of your friends, all of your family. We want to get the word out about how great 40-ish is. We do. So our most 40-ish moment, it is a joint moment of celebration because Nicole and I, we won an award. We did.

We won an award. A comedy award. Yeah. And do you know what? We were in a category with Rommis Rankin. Nathan. We were. And we won.

And we won. We won on the back of your meltdown about Jake. Jacob Allardy. My Jacob Allaudy perving. Yeah. Which is funny because I feel nothing for him now. Well, he's dead to me. That's the men of the horse for you.

I don't have a libido now, so now I don't get. I'm over it. But anyway, yes, it was, it was fun. It was fun. It was a good night. I had a gin and tonic. You had a Diet Coke. We did drive.

Drove. Yeah. Nearly drove into a bollard. That was weird. Yeah, that was special. Drove to South London. Yeah. And then we tried to pounce a cigarette of something.

somebody at the end, didn't we? That didn't work? No. We didn't have a cigarette. Cheeky cigarette because we shouldn't smoke. No one should. Kills you. But you actually have cigarettes at home. Sometimes I do, yeah. You've been for emergencies only. It was an emergency. It was an emergency win. Yeah. Yeah. I really fancied a cigarette in that moment. I haven't had one for months. No, I haven't had one since Barcelona. But what we did have was a protein yogurt in the car. And an apple. It's just a yogurt Just a yogurt

Just a yogurt A protein yogurt Yeah 10 grams of protein This has 20 Wow High protein yogurt Yeah

Yeah And an apple And you know what You were really dissing The whole snack thing And then when we got in the car Because there was no food In Clapton

No When we got in the car And the apple was sat there I said to you I said to you're really happy That you've got an apple now You're like You know what

I kind of am happy Yeah Then I had the apple and you only ate the shit out of that apple. How was your apple? I was like, you know what? It was okay. It wasn't McDonald's, but it was all right. Yeah.

Yeah. But it went down a treat, right? Yeah, I mean, it went down as well as an apple can. I mean, dinner was a packet of salt and vinegar crisps at the venue, a gin and tonic and an apple. I mean, I've had worse dinners. Yeah. In my life. Thank God I bought the protein yogurt.

Anyway. Well, the next day, we got a, um, an email from the organisers just saying congratulations and thanks for being there and everything else. If you want the feedback, then we can give you the feedback of what the judges said. I said, oh yeah, go on then. So I'm going to read you the feedback. It's so cute. The feedback is this, everybody. And by the way, can I just say that the show, we make the show together. Because without our listeners, without our quazas, we don't have any content. So we've got nothing to talk about. And so you guys are building the show into what it is, and we are truly utterly grateful.

Lauren and Nicole succeed in finding laughter in the listener moment without laughing at it. They bring the humor into the discussion around vulnerable moments for their listener in such a beautiful way. Instantly relatable and relentlessly energetic. How lovely is that? Relentlessly energetic. No one's ever described me as that in my life. I'm going to put that on my bio. I love that.

I'm relentlessly energetic. You're not, though. I'm so not. I am. You are, but I am not. The host clearly have a lot of chemistry, and hearing them talk and laugh makes me feel like I'm listening to two best friends.

I mean, bingo. Yes. That's what we're always going for. The host's laughter and screams are also infectious, and I loved the Heathcliff slash James comparison. That was the Jacob Lord a bit. They time their handovers perfectly in the way that only people who are quite skilled at radio work

or both can. Isn't that cute? So nice. Midlife news. Okay. Well, it's more baby news. Congratulations to Sienna. She's just had her third baby.

How old is she? She said that she found having children after 40 much easier than she had in her 20s. That's interesting. She told Glamour magazine, having had a baby at 29, then a baby at 42 and now 44, it's so much easier when you don't have the conflict of feeling scattered and like you want to be doing X, Y, Z. If I'm in bed at 9pm with a book, I'm so happy now. Yeah, but you're in bed with a book and a newborn. But also, feeling scattered. It's like, hello, you wait.

I can't give you two years. I'll tell you you you're going to be scattered. Now I've got the excuse to do it. Life is in a more grounded space. I think the 30s are chaos. By the time you hit 40s, you're like, I kind of know who I am and I don't really give a shit about what anyone else thinks.

I'm a much more grounded human. We don't judge men who are having kids in their 80s. Why on Earth is there any sort of narrative? Ciena previously revealed that she froze her eggs when she turned 40 because she knew she wanted a bigger family. Well, congratulations to Ciana Miller. That is absolutely lovely. And I do agree with her. She's right. Al Pacino had a baby at 82. Robert De Niro just had one in his 80s. No one comments. No one cares. So why is it anyone's business now? But I'm not commenting in a negative way. So why should anyone care that she has a baby at 44? Why shouldn't she? I know. I just think I would find that really hard to have a baby at 44. But then I'd had my babies. So I'd had my babies by the time I was 30.

all three of them. Me too. I also wouldn't want to have one now. But I get what she's saying. Like it comes, there's pros and cons to having a baby that bit later when you're that bit older because you have a much more grounded head on you.

Sure. Sure. I mean, I kind of feel like I grew up with my children. So I didn't really know any different. I had them so young. You did. Yeah. I kind of did it with them.

You did. So I had them in my 20s, really, all of them. So anyway, congratulations. We don't know if it's a boy or a girl and we don't know the name because she's kept it private. as is her right. Yes.

Well, we didn't really do a 40-ish moment because we talked about the award. Yeah. But I have a 40-ish moment. Oh, please share with the group. Do you not have one? I don't. I mean, my whole life is a 40-ish moment.

Yeah. I don't have one this morning, no. Please share with the group. You have to be kind. I'll do my best. It's about my hair. Oh, again, with the hair. What do you mean again?

Well, last week we had the problem with the clip and your hairline and you said it was another menopause symptom. You're very upset. Right. So, like, when I try and do, like, blow dry my hair in sort of like a trendier way. Yeah. I like it. We do it with like the kinks and the kicks.

Yeah, but this is my point. Yeah. Every time I do that, when I see it on other people, I really like it with me. And I know you're going to say that, oh, the mumsy word again, but I feel really mumsy. Oh, no, you've got to stop using it. Listen, can I just say, if I was your therapist. I would strongly, I would, I would, you will never be my therapist. I will never be anyone's therapist, ever.

Yeah. But I would say, I think you, the, the mumsy issue is coming from within. Oh, you think. It's an internal feeling. It's not an external. It's not an external. Of course it's an internal thing. Yeah. What's it mean?

I like it when you do your kinks in your, what's it mean? I think it means that you feel mumsy without your uterus, but you know what? They can't put it back. But you'd think I'd feel the opposite. Because you can't be a mum with that uterus. Yeah. I know what you mean. Yeah.

But, like, biologically, that doesn't make sense. No, but it's, yeah, it's done something. Is that what it is? Definitely. It's definitely done something to you. Yeah. What?

I don't know. No, I agree with you, by the way. I do agree with that. But I don't really know, like, what. And then people keep asking me, like, how are you feeling you're better now? You're better now. I'm really, Monty.

My vagina's great, but I'm really mummassy now. What's happened is I've got rid of all of these problems with this and that and the other. And I'm now in full menopause, but I'm really mumsy. Basically, I can't wear any outfits and my hair is not great. So be warned, that is a post-historectomy symptom. Mumsiness. As I walked into the gym and she was walking out this morning. And she said, oh, how are you feeling you really all better?

How are your stitches, mumsy? I don't have stitches. Oh no, I know you don't anymore. I haven't had stitches for a long time. So hang on. So when you do the kink, the thing, the blah, la, la, on you it's looking bad, but on everyone else looking great. Is that what you're saying? Yeah.

Not true. And then I saw this girl. Yeah. You know why? Because my hair's got thicker. Oh. And I realised that that is an annoying thing to hear because a lot of people lose the hair. Or it thin.

Yeah. Yeah. It gets a lot finer. Finer. Sorry, we don't you thinning. It gets a lot finer as you get older. It really does.

But my hair has gotten much coarser because it's very grey now. So it's much coarser and there just seems to be like more of it. More of it. Just so much of it. So I'm finding it harder to control. Harder to do. And then I really want to like. Maybe that's just part and parcel of being in menopause is just harder to control.

Because it's just free now. I can't even tell what my hair looks like free. I'd love to see it Would you? Well, you've seen mine It's just Bon Jovi Circon 1982 Yeah, but that's

You still got What are you checking On your phone? My parking? Because you feel very distracted Do you want to do your parking? No, I can't For one minute and seven seconds

Well, you can No, I can't I have to wait for it to expire And then free part I don't think you do I do I do It's fine

Well, I would like your full attention Okay, I'm not getting it You're not getting it You're not getting it For 50-49 seconds What should we do For 49 seconds Sing a song?

What should we do? Have you done your parking? You're back with me. Are you asking me to resolve your hair issues? Because can I just remind you I'm not the qualified hairdresser. I actually, no. I hadn't finished. There was a girl in the changing room.

Yeah. And she had a black bob a bit longer than mine. Yeah. Right? And she was, her hair was like, swishy. It was like Demi Moore in, in, what was the film? Proposal. Thank you.

Thank you. Demi Moore and indecent proposal. Swishy. Nice. Like she just stepped out of the salon. You know, and it was all like curled under. Oh, right. Cute. Yeah.

And like swishy. Cute. And I had like movement. Nice. And I just thought, if you've woken up like that, like anyway. So I thought I'm going to do my hair like that this morning. And now I just feel mumsy. I can't.

I can't unsee it. I just feel mumsy. Okay. So this is something you do. you're going to need to work on. How? How am I going to work on that? What am I going to do? What am I going to do? No, please don't get a load of piercings. I don't even know what to pierce. I mean, I definitely don't want to pierce my boobies. Please don't pierce your boobies. I mean, please don't pierce those. Anyway, so how am I going to work on it internally?

I think, what do I need to do? Seas. C- therapists who isn't me. Really? Well, I don't know, but it does seem to be coming up a lot. Also, it may help you to know that somebody on Instagram, there was some one of our videos that went up and someone just put underneath it, Nicole is fabulous. Who was that? I don't know. Just someone. It's probably my dad. It wasn't your dad. Actually, I know what it was. It was on our stories when we were driving to the awards. It was your mom. It wasn't Jackie. No, although Jackie loves to tell me that all the time. But you were, yeah, yeah, she loves me. No, you were in your, like, We do love each other, me, and I know.

You're in your beige jumpsuit and your driving glasses. We were headed to the show and we were doing a whole story about being headed to the awards and someone just put, Nicholas Fabulous. Oh my God, I felt underneath. I'm going to tell you now that night, mumsy. Why it's surprised you to hear this? I felt so mumsy. Can I just say it's not particularly cool and hip to carry yoghurt in your car?

Do you know what I mean? Like when you were 19 going out for the evening, were you carrying yoghirts and an apple in your car? Just in case. So it's the yoghurt's fault. I think it might be. You know what I used to go out with when I was that age? Like a lipstick and a prayer. No.

Packet of Marbury lights and a pair of clean knickers. That was it. I was actually known for always carrying a pair of clean knickers for the next day. I still get off. Have you still got knickers in your handbag? I'm like, no. Well, were you like some dirty stopper? I can't imagine you were.

I didn't go home sometimes. Needed a clean pet for the next day. Sometimes I'm not having like one night stands. having one night stands, but sometimes I wasn't wearing knickers. You know, it was a whole thing. Now. So you. Now I've got to go. So you. Just to like, fuck it out. I'm not going to wear knickers. I know, I don't feel like knickers. I'm not wearing knickers. My vagina can just breathe life into anything. I once went to, I shouldn't tell you. No, come on. Come on. I once went to an all-night diner.

It used to be open in town. It was in like the Kings Road. And I once went just in a coat and shoes. that was all I wore. Why? Why? Just for fun. Just literally for fun. What if you wanted to take it? Well, you didn't even have knickers on?

I had nothing on. Just the coat. You just kept the coat on. I did keep the coat on. Otherwise, I would have been arrested, yeah. Just for fun. Such a weird thing to do. It was so fun.

Also, I would now worry about being hot. Now you were. Oh, no, I've got to take that old. Now you were, but then you wouldn't. Did you see? No. Did you see? Yeah.

Fun. That's not mumsy. Thanks. Thanks. I think drop the yoghirts. The yoghuts are not the problem. No. It's inside.

Maybe you need to do something really crazy to make you feel un-m-m-m-y. Like what? Like what? Like stay up to 11.30 on a Wednesday night. Don't be ridiculous. I can't do that. And like when I tell Adam, yeah, he's not massively helpful. Does he say like, well, you are a mum?

No, he says he's like, oh, mumsy. Okay. Well, Lissy's not saying, yeah, you are. You're totally right. No, you're mumsy as fuck. Liz is not saying that. Obviously he's not going to say. It's like when I was pregnant.

I'm like, oh, do you think I look that? And he was like, he kept saying, no, look exactly the same. He said it until I was like, until I was dropping that baby. Thank God, he said that. He's placating me. Yeah, good. That's good. Well, it's not working.

I got out of bed this morning and literally I woke up, got out of my bed, was walking to the bathroom to do a wee. and Ollie greeted me with, you know, your legs look like they've got absolutely no muscles in them. Not in greeting. And I went, I turned around and I said, that's because they don't. Well, they do. They have some. You wouldn't be able to stand up and down.

Maybe you should do something about that. I was like, I can't really be bothered. And then I did a wee. And I was like, that, that is marriage. That is many decades of marriage. That is your morning greeting. And also, like, he didn't mean it in a mean way. And I didn't really care that he said it.

You know what I mean? Like if you were 22 and you woke up in the morning and the guy next to you said that, you'd be devastated. You'd be booking a PT. You'd be putting on those niggas that you had in your handbag and you would be leaving the door. You'd be like shamed. You'd be putting on tracks at the bottoms. You'd be booking a PT. You'd be like so paranoid.

You'd be asking all your friends. Do you think I've got muscle? I'm like, what if Adam said that to me? What do you do spend every second every day in the gym working out? It would be a bit weird if you said it to you. I mean, they still look like I'm going to muscle. I'm not known. My legs are mumsy.

Before we dive into your dilemmas, a quick disclaimer. We're not doctors or healthcare professionals. If there's an issue, you're seriously struggling with. Please contact a qualified expert. Hi ladies, Aussie fan of the show here. Please keep me anon. Oh, okay. You know what?

We do have a lot of Aussie fans. We do. And New Zealand. I would love to go to Australia to do a live show, wouldn't you? I would too. But what about New Zealand? That's even further. I'll go to both.

Okay. I've never been to New Zealand. I've never been to Australia. Oh, it's beautiful, can't you. I've been to either. My husband and me are both early 40s, been together 12 years. He started to get fit about six months ago and running every evening before dinner

became his thing to clear his head, etc. A few months in, he started mentioning people he met on his route. There was one woman in particular, divorced. We have a kid at the same school as hers, but I don't know her. Now his solo runs are not so solo. Last week, he came back a bit later and said he had stopped for a quick diet.

Coke on the way back at a cafe near the beach. When I asked with who, he hesitated, then said with her, but it was totally innocent. Just a post-workout drink. He swore nothing weird happened, but I do not know what he is like at 6pm on a Tuesday with a woman who is not his wife. I do not know what they talk about running for five miles. I feel a bit paranoid, but I don't want to be controlling or micromanage his life. I feel stuck between wondering if I'm overreacting because of my past trust issues or whether my instincts are picking up on something real.

He's never given me a reason not to trust him before but the secrecy and defensiveness around this friendship feels off to me. What would you do or say thanks? Oh! I mean, it's not appropriate.

You don't think? No. It's not appropriate to have a running buddy of the opposite sex? Are we actually, back to Harry Met Sally, men and women can never be friends without sex getting in the way. No, they can.

And I play paddle with a lot of other men than Adam. Well, I was about to say, that's not inappropriate. No, it's not inappropriate. And then we, sometimes they'll say, oh, do you want to have a coffee after? Is anyone sticking around for a coffee? And sometimes I will have a coffee with another man at the David Lloyd. Okay. I don't think that's inappropriate.

I don't think it is either. And Adam wouldn't have the slightest issue with it. Ollie's doubles partner is a woman and he plays doubles with her and then sometimes they might have a call. I'm fine with that. Okay. Yeah, but does this feel fine to you? The only reason it doesn't feel fine to me is because she's saying that it feels off to

her and her instincts are picking something up and I am a big believer in go with the gut. If the gut is telling you, it's telling you for a reason. Yeah. But I also think she has to have a conversation with him and just say, listen, Maybe I am overreacting because I have got some trust issues and this might be on me, but I feel quite uncomfortable about this and just see what he has to say. I think, and then you'll know by his reaction. If he's defensive or weird or off, you'll know.

She said he was defensive. The secrecy and defensiveness around this friendship feels off to me. That's what she said. It's that. I would just have a conversation and just explain very clearly, I feel really uncomfortable. This is making me feel uncomfortable and that might be on me, because I'm a bit untrusting generally.

It's not anything you've done and I'm sure it's above board, but it's making me feel uncomfortable. Listen, if Adam started to run out of nowhere and then he started running with a woman out of nowhere and then he was suddenly coming home a little bit later out of nowhere and then he's like, oh yeah, we just had a drink and everything's fine

and it's completely innocent. And he said those words, it would be like, no, that's not right. it feels off. I know what she's saying. I'm not suggesting that no man or no woman can run with someone of the opposite sex and it always has to mean something other than friendship. But this particular situation sounds a bit off to me.

It does. But you know what? If something's going to happen, it's going to happen. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, it is. So it's kind of, she can make it very clear how she feels about it. That's all she can do. But if that's how it's going to pass,

pan out, unfortunately, you don't want to be married to him anyway. I don't, I don't mean that in a blunt or mean way, but you can't. Blunt it was. But what I mean is she can't stop it. She can say how she feels and she can explain very clearly she's not feeling okay with it. And either he stops doing it or he doesn't. But I do get it. She's like, she doesn't want to micromanage him or seem controlling or be like that,

that wife. If Adda was suddenly running with a woman a few times a week, and then he was suddenly coming home later because he was having coffee with her, I would have a problem with that. I would have a problem with that. He also plays paddle with other women because that's just the nature of the game.

I don't have the slightest issue. And if they all sat around afterwards, having a coffee, I don't have the slightest issue with it. All of them sitting around. This is the two of them. That's what I'm saying. Yeah, that's...

And it's repeated. If it's a repeated situation, it's that. You know what? She doesn't need to know what they talk about on their five-mile run. Like he is allowed a life outside of, I'm just playing devil's advocate.

He is allowed a social life outside of their marriage. And they might have all sorts of conversations. They might, but usually, if it walks like a duck and it quacks like a duck, it's a duck.

And if it feels off to her, there's a reason it feels off. And it might be her stuff and it might not be, but it is definitely worth talking it through with him. I 100% agree with you, but I always like to a little bit

play the other side, you know? ever, ever mistrust your instinct and your gut. Never. And any time that I have, I have always said to myself, always trust my instinct. My gut was telling me that. You know? I do know. If something feels off, it's off. Yeah. I've really learnt that. 49 years of being on this planet, I have really learnt that. Yeah. And I tell my girls that all the time. If that doesn't feel right, it's not right for you. If it feels off for her, it's off for her. That's it. Regardless of what's happening over there, It doesn't work for her, and their marriage has to come first. You've got to have the chat.

Yeah. Again, even if you've already had it. Yeah. Be very clear. Yeah. Right. Meltdowns. It's half a meltdown and half action.

I'm a bit proud of myself. Still fiddling with my hair. I know. It's endless. It looks fine. It looks good. Looks great. Start that again.

It looks great. It's really cool. It doesn't look cool. It looks. I'm young. You look like. 27. I don't even want to love 27. I have no issue looking 49. It looks 49 and cool. That? Should I go with that? Just go with something sincere. It looks like your normal hair.

I mean, like, I can't see the difference in your hair. When you had a uterus in your hair, post uterus, to me, it's the same hair. I know I'm not a very observant person, but like, it looks the same to me. So pre-uterus and post-usis. There's no difference to me. No. It looks the same. It looks the same. My meltdown is this. It's about a tumble dryer. It doesn't get more fortage than tumble dryers. Yeah.

The catch, the bit that on the door, the catch, has snapped. So the door will not shut. So the dryer doesn't work. So the dryer does work. The dryer works fine, but the door won't shut. What do you do? Have to stand there holding the door? No, I called the engineer, obviously.

So can you replace the bit? He was like, no. Have to replace the whole. door. Really? Have you got one in the van? I might do. Come so. I'm like, he will. I know he will. I'm manifesting because I've got the sheets and the towels and like, I can't be doing with that. No, don't have one in the van and it's a special part. It's going to be at least two weeks. You don't have a dryer? I was like, no, fuck this. I can't do it. I said, what if I like fashioned something to keep the door shut? Would it break the machine or would it be fine? He's like, no,

that would be fine. I said, so basically you're giving me permission to hack the broken door. He was like, yes. Anyway, I have fashioned this whole thing in the laundry room with like a chair, stool, weighted situation. Put the dryer on, put the weights against it. Lo and behold, it works. Did you find that on YouTube? No, I made it up in my own head. You should put a video on YouTube.

Shall I be the YouTube video hack woman? If you've got a problem with your Bosch. It's better than the old Farty woman, isn't it? So it was a meltdown. But I've turned it into a... I'm really proud of myself. Yeah. Yeah.

Good for you. I can't wait two weeks. Good for you. Yeah. Thanks. Thanks. Proud of you too. Thanks.

What's yours? My hometown is this. Yeah. Last week, you called my shoes Tarty. Tartes. Yep. Yeah. Tarty.

I mean, there is a slim difference. Anyway, I seem to have gone out of my way. In between times when I am not thinking about how mumsy I am. I've gone out of my way to try and prove to you they're not tardy. You sent me a photo of Kyle from Real House House. Coler Richards. I'm wearing with nothing. It's just there was the picture. With the shoes circled.

No, no. Just a photo. You loved that though, didn't you? I actually loved the slight passive aggressive nature of the photo. It was a remotely slightly positive aggressive. It was actually quite aggressive. And she found it very funny. Very funny. Very funny. Yeah. She's very stylish. Yeah. She's cool. She's not mumsy. She is not mumsy. She is

Stylish sheet is cool. Yeah. Okay. Then I sent you another photo. Yeah. A couple of days later. Yeah. They were on a Topshop.

Yeah. Circled. Yeah. Sent to you. Yes. What did you say? They are truly tarty. I said they are real slut shoes.

They were in like lipstick red. So we've gone from tarty to slut. Yeah. I think the bright red is. Mine are bright red. No, yours are burgundy. They are burgundy. They are not bright red.

pillar box lipstick red. They're not Mumsy though. I'm not Mumsy, but why aren't you wearing them today? Anyway, what I'm trying to show you is that they are on trend. Who are you trying to prove that you are not Mumsy to? Really? Oh my God, it's super big into everything. Silly out of everything.

That shit is like spreading. Yeah. I've got to get this shit under control. You do. You really do. What am I going to do? I don't know. Maybe go out for dinner just in a coat and no knickers for the night and see how that feels. on mumsy

It feels already Wear your Mac Wear your like Mac Your flashes Mac Wear that Won't be hot Just wear that And those shoes

Go out for dinner Come home Feel less Mumsy I'm gonna feel like a Purve So what I think I prefer I prefer mumsy No

Perps much more fun No I'm serious Could you just admit That they are on trend Just admit They are on trend You have to be sincere about it

Morning Ladies Is this something anyone else can relate to or is it just happening to me? I'm 53 years old in Perry on HRT doing okay. However, a new thing has started happening recently, farting without warning. Yes, they just come out, no warning at all. I can be in the office, the supermarket, the gym, and out they bugle, she said. Bugle. No smell, generally.

But they are not. They are noisy. What's worse. What is worse? Silent and deadly or loud and nose fragrance? I'm harmless. Well, it depends who you're asking. It's not a great choice, is it?

I try to pretend it hasn't happened. And if people here, I act like it wasn't me. It's just another thing that comes with the change of life, I guess. Yasmin, New Zealand. Oh, Yasmin. Sorry, Yasmin. You're not going to like what I say next. I don't think that's a perimenopausal thing.

I do. I do. I do think it is. I think it might be like gut hip related. No, I do think it is. Why are you having it? I've heard this. I've heard this. I've never heard you fart.

I know. I've heard this. Oh, really? You're not a burper. Well, at home they say I am, but I don't think I am. I've never heard you burp or fart. No, I've been married 30 years and Ollie still hasn't heard me fart. In 30 years.

Are you joking? I'm not joking. Ask him. Honestly. But I have to. Do you not fart? I have to say I do feel like the change of life, maybe changing that. Good.

I'm here for that. I mean, I don't want to. I'm so here for the loud farce coming from you. That will really, and if it happens on the show, I'm not editing it out. It will never happen on the show. Listen, we're doing a massive, we're hosting this massive menopause tent. We are. At the every woman festival, we must say that.

Yeah, we are. on the July, June the 13th. Yeah. And we are going to be there all day, Quazas. So we would love it if you come. It's in London.

It's in Islington at the Business Design Centre. And it is a beautiful festival for every woman at any stage of life through birth and beyond. About your gut health. Bone health. Like guine issues. Everything. Literally anything. There's doctors there.

It's going to be gorgeous. There's workout things there. There's workshops. and there's like a bookshop and a street food. Yeah, it's going to be really fun. But we're hosting the menopause tent and we're interviewing doctors all day long and actually some of the subject matters are brilliant. Absolutely brilliant and if you listen to our show at Self Care Club,

you all have heard from some of the doctors and they're all very personable, very interesting and we're going to be interviewing the Met. Anyway, we'd love to see you but what I was going to say is we are hosting that tent all day without a break. Yeah. Like it's a full on day. Are you hoping our farm? Well, I'm hoping you don't fart on that day because that won't. I won't.

I won't. Interviewing Professor Dame Leslie. Do you know what? I kind of feel like Dame Leslie would be fine with a fart. She'd be like, yes, farting happens. Do you what I mean? If all the people, she'd be cool about it. Yeah, whilst she's putting on her lipstick.

Literally, yeah, well, yeah, exactly that. Oh, well, a fart. She'd be like the celia emery of farts. You know what I mean? She'd be fine with the fart. She reminds me of her. Yeah, she is quite like her. I'm obsessed with her.

have found in the mornings, there's a little trumping going on and I noticed it's a new thing. And I think it is preemone. I am putting that and putting that right at the front of the show. Oh, I fucking am. Of course I am. You dare. I guess I am. But you know, I'll have to listen once they heard that clip.

Jasmine, I do think it's a thing. It's not the first time I've heard this. You know what? I'm glad to say that it's maybe the only symptom I don't have of perimenopause. Well, it could be coming. Can't. Oh yeah, you're done. done. That's good. That's good. You know, it's a very fine line between that, Yasmin, and the full

mirror-mugolus. And I have to say, if that happens to me, I'm just going to go and live in a shed alone in Devon. You should. Do you know what I mean? Because that's not okay. I will take you myself. Please, lock me in and leave me there with Jeff. You're not going to do that. Leave me and Jeff there because he won't care. What about Beba? She would care. Excuse me. She's a princess. She would care if mummy's farting. And she would also care if mummy leaves. Well, yeah. But she'd have to... She wouldn't like that.

She'd rather be home with the non-farters than in a shed with a farty old woman. I don't think she... Farty old woman. Yeah. Beba's not down for that. Love that for you. No, I don't love that for me. Anyway... Farty old woman. Lovely. What a delightful note to end today's show on.

You know what? It's so highbrow our show. What do you do for a living? I go to work and talk about farts with my friend. Brilliant. Brilliant. Oh, that is absolutely fantastic. It's so embarrassing when people ask what I do for living.

We should make up a new job. Do you know what I mean? But everyone finds it really cool when you say I'm a podcaster. What's your podcast about? And you want to say like, oh, business leadership and management strategy. I'm going to just start saying that. It's about business leadership and management strategy. What do you say?

I say it's about women's, I say it's about women's wellness and just being in midlife. Like that's some highbrow thing. I don't say I sit with my friend and talk about anxious vaginas and farts. Being an old, what was it, an old farty woman. Yeah, farty old woman. And rescue dogs and I don't, I don't do that at all. Other shit we talk about. People ask me, look, my dad has a friend, Robert, he's like the loveliest guy.

And he always says to me, he goes, oh, how's the podcast? I saw us go really well, thanks Robby's. What do you have to talk about? Don't you just dry up? Do you find it so hard to find topics? I'm like, no, Robert, we don't. Robert, the well is deep and endless. We can talk shit to our kids and come.

And we do. And we do. That's the one piece of the job that isn't hard. And people seem to want to listen to it. That's the best bit of all. Yeah. Well, not our husbands. No, of course not our husbands.

Because I said to As of the other day, you don't actually listen to my show, so you wouldn't know whatever I was. I was talking about it. I listened to it, day in, day out. I don't need to hear the edited version. Ollie says the same thing. He said to me yesterday, I don't know why he asked, because I don't think he really cares.

He probably wanted Cuddles a bus. He said, what's your... Did he get it? No. He said, what's your show about tomorrow? No, he definitely wanted Cuddles Cuddle's best. I said, what? He said, what's your show about tomorrow?

I was like, it's 40-ish. I'm not doing self-care club tomorrow. It's 40-ish-moor. Yeah, but what's it about? I know what it's about. It's about being in midlife. Yeah, but what's your subject matter? Like, well...

You. Well, this... You and Fardy. This conversation. Like, well, just kind of like what comes up. And he was like, well, what do you talk about? You know, yeah. Yeah.

No. It's the whole thing. Anyway. It's an odd. Is it? Yes. It is an art. We will be back next week.

We will. We hope because we've got the podcast show. Oh yeah, we're going to be recording episodes live from the podcast show. So it's going to sound a little different. We've got time. We will have time. We're going to make the time. We are so busy at the podcast show.

I've made us so busy. Okay, we are going to have time. We're going to record shows from there. They'll sound a bit different, but it will still be ours. It'll still be the same show. Yeah. Okay. Yeah.

See you then. We'll see you then, Quazasas. Don't forget to send in your emails. Make sure you subscribe. and I think that's it. I'd buy some tickets to the Every Woman Festival on June the 13th. Link is in the show, though,

where we're hosting a Meliquors tent. Bye!