40ish - S*xting, Window Cleaners & Going Viral

Episode Date: September 5, 2024

Welcome to 40ish! Lauren and Nicole went viral (but are too middle aged to figure out why). Someone has seen the class rep's vag and can't unsee it and another listener has a mortifying exchange with her window cleaner. We would love to hear from you!  Please come and be part of the conversation. To share your dilemmas, rants, funny stories or general complaints about midlife please be in touch at: Email [e-mail] Instagram https://www.instagram.com/40ish.podcast  TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@40ish.podcast Facebook  https://www.facebook.com/share/DVQWb6y2vesgeHEK/?mibextid=LQQJ4d Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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I take it this isn't from you. And I hope it's not from you. It's not from me. Anyway, I've got this new thing now. When he sends me, like, domestic messages, like, I got one last week, It's not for me. Anyway. I've got this new thing now. When he sends me, like, domestic messages, like, I got one last week, I've bought some drain unblocker.

I mean... So I reply... How did we get here? I reply with, stop flirting with me. Does it really matter? Yeah. We're all grown adults. I don't want the whole of the class to see my m men. Let me just put that out there for the record.

Do you? I'd rather they didn't. Before we jump into the show, we're very excited and honoured to tell you that we are currently part of Spotlight. Spotlight is a project from Apple Podcasts which highlights a creator or creative team every couple of months and they've chosen us for the month of September. Apple's editorial team believes that you are going to want to be spending a lot more time with us and we definitely want to be spending more time with you. So they have kindly put us together. Thank you so much Apple Podcasts. We really hope you enjoy this brand new show and we hope you stick around to talk about all things midlife. brand new show and we hope you stick around to talk about all things midlife.

Welcome to 40ish, I'm Nicole Goodman. And I'm Lauren Mishkun. This is a brand new podcast that's navigating the challenges and absurdities of 40-something life and we're going to solve all your dilemmas. Or at least we attempt to. In the coming weeks we're going to discuss your problems, issues and rounds that you have kindly shared with us and also we're going to discuss your problems, issues and rants that you have kindly shared with us. And also we're going to divulge our own stories about our own complicated mess in midlife. Basically, it's just to make us all feel better and not worse and not weird about the mundane chaos that comes with middle age. How's it going this week, Lauren? It's been very, very busy. In fact, not just busy, viral. viral virally busy and i don't mean ill

i mean it in the new way in the way the kids say we went viral we did go viral one million watches views views you can't go viral and then get all the terms wrong you can't it's against the law the viral law the social media law one million views views yes did you say watches on purpose you did just to wind me up just to annoy you yeah um actually it's more than one million views is it it's one million it was one million views currently it is still going on instagram and we've had nearly 900,000 views on TikTok. So we're nearing nearly 2 million views on this one reel. Two 40-something-year-old women have gone viral. Who knew that was even allowed? And you know what it was about, listeners?

No, we don't either. We don't really understand it, but we started using some kid slang, like skibbity-rizz-ohio-toilet and all this nonsense that the little ones are chatting about. And well, there was a lot of controversy over it, wasn't there? And a lot of replying. And a lot of trolling.

A lot of trolling and a lot of things said to us that we don't understand. Like- There was, it was as if the comments were in a different language at one point. What is Fannum Tax? Well, you asked me this the other day and I said to you, you said, do you know,

you opened the door and you said to me, do you know what Fannum Tax is? And I honestly, very seriously said, I don't know, you do our accounts. Yeah, and then I'm looking up, like, is it some new labor policy they've brought in? Who is is this some no it's not it it's a person it's a slang yes it's like he's a person he's a person it's not you can't say a slang either can you it's it's just slang it's just slang yeah we're we are so down with the kids wow oh it's a slang term

yeah and then one of the funniest parts was apparently this big YouTuber shared our story from TikTok. I think his name's Elhan. So we weren't remotely aware of it. We didn't have a clue. Right. And your 18 year old told you about it. He was like, get downstairs. Get downstairs now.

I said, what is that? Elhan's shared your thing on his stories. I was like. Was he annoyed? No, he couldn't believe it. Well, he was shocked. He's like my mundane middle-aged mother. She's saying skibbity toilet.

And this guy, I don't even know who this guy is. Some YouTuber. I don't know. He's like shared it on his stories. And his mates had been messaging him in the morning going, mate, your mum's gone viral. Mate, your mum's famous. Oh my God, that must have been mortifying. And then my other son at uni, he's got his friends messaging him going, your mum's famous oh my god that must have been mortifying your mum's uh and then my other son at uni he's got his friends messaging him going your mum's just come up on my for you page

like what the fuck is going on and the kid's like mum what is happening anyway you turn around to zach and you go oh that's so nice shall i shall i dm him and say thank you he's like no mom don't beg that's so beggy and then when he came down i saw him in the afternoon so i said so should we should we message him and thank him because oh just he like hands over the eyes he's shown you the love he's shown you the love just leave it leave it now but anyway thanks alhan i know that's really like uncool to say but i feel should I send him a bunch of flowers? But I always think it's nice to be respectful. You know?

It's so funny. We did not understand any of it. It was hilarious. And there were arguments and people got very irate and they were all questioning how people are parenting kids. It got quite political. I also really enjoyed being called both a chav and also a Cotswold Land Rover pheasant shooting mum.

Both. I got accused of both simultaneously. No, it was a Land Rover, it was a Cotswold Land Rover driving pheasant shooting mum whose husband works in London. Oh, that. Yeah, but also a chav. chav i've been called a lot worse than both of those things yeah i thought that was very specific really specific yeah

we also got called milfs oh yeah take that yeah we also got asked to dm a couple of very young chaps did we yeah i stopped you were right you were listen i'm gonna say another very cool term now come on you were and you do do this quite a lot that i've noticed much more than me you were living in the comments do you know what that means yeah i totally do know what that means well for the people that are listening at home that don't what does it mean it means like engaging with the trolls i was playing with the trolls under the bridge yeah but i really got into it and i had a lot of fun well you're listen you don't always have a lot of fun when you're living in your comments no do you no because you sometimes get very very upset so true and i'll be honest at the beginning of when it started to go viral you were getting upset and i woke up one morning and i'm normally awake two

hours before you are and i noticed I was sitting there putting my makeup on and my phone is just blowing up. And I thought, oh, it's just the real. It was actually you replying to the trolls saying, I mean, the things you were saying. And I was thinking, oh my God, she's so activated and triggered. And I just messaged you, please put the phone down.

Stop playing with the trolls. But I was really enjoying myself. And then the kids were watching, they were like, mum, mum, what they're doing, it's called fishing, it's called fishing. And I didn't understand. They're like fishing for you to reply. And I didn't really understand until one of the trolls

actually put an emoji of a fishing line and fish in it. And I thought, oh, I'm doing this all wrong just before we dive into your dilemmas a quick disclaimer we're not doctors or healthcare professionals this is just a fun space where we share our thoughts which could be totally wrong so if there is an issue where you are seriously struggling please do contact a qualified expert. Let's get started. What is our question from our listener today Laura Mishkon? I've accidentally seen the class rep's vag and I can't unseesee it i take it this isn't from you and i hope it's not from you

it's not from me okay okay i'm in i'm in brace yourself oh no oh no this morning at 7 a.m as i was making coffee and getting ready for the school run a notification on my son's class whatsapp group pinged i opened the message expecting the usual life-sucking, please bring in a pound for left-handed awareness day. Hate those. Hate those. And I've always forgotten. And then I'm like, you know, like trying to find the pound

and who's got the pound. I'm always on the back foot with these things. Please wear odd socks. Please bring in a sandwich with only a filling beginning with the letter P. It is just. What about crazy hair day with boys it's easier because they just say no oh do they is that even an option yeah crazy hair day i'm pleased in senior school they don't do world book day anymore because that was like another huge part of the mother's mental load world book day sorry it's like who fucking needs this i get that it's nice can't you just the teachers dress up and be done with it i just say nobody needs this nobody needs this including the teachers

when i opened the message i was greeted by a nude selfie of one of the mums in my class oh my god oh my god she was wet out the shower towel around her neck crouching down pouting full minge on display no no no no no no no no no no clearly intended for someone else. You think? You think it was for the class group? She must have realised her error as two minutes later, she had deleted it. Oh my God, could you imagine? She's the class rep. Oh my God, could you imagine?

It doesn't matter if she's the class rep or just a mum in the class. It's not just mums on the group. Some of the dads are on it too oh no she didn't oh no she didn't what are the chances that i was the only one to see it i am cringing at the thought of seeing her at pickup i just can't i can't i can't so sorry for her listen what are the chances of her being the only one that saw it unlikely what are the chances of her being the only one that saw it unlikely? What are the chances of other mums or dads having seen it and screenshotting it? I was thinking that, but would you screenshot it?

Because I definitely wouldn't. No way. And why would you want to save something like that? As collateral, it would only be a really bitchy thing to do, to hold it against someone, wouldn't it? Whatever she does or doesn't do at pick up, I can guarantee the woman who sent the photo

ain't gonna notice what you say or what you don't say because she's gonna be in her own shame spiral coming to pick up herself. I mean... Do you think she's in

a long-term marriage? No. Do you think she's in a new relationship? Okay. Well, when was the last time you sent ollie a photo like that over whatsapp or anywhere the 12th of never right i mean i have never done that i have also never done that i think i've i've written to adam once in our

entire marriage and let's bear in mind we've been together 20 years. It's coming up for 20 years. Next week. Oh my God. The only time I have ever messaged him, it wasn't even a photo. It was, can we have sex tonight, please? Which is not particularly raunchy. You could have worded that in a much hotter way.

Well, I mean, I probably... And also like, is any husband going to say no thanks to that? He must have been delighted to have received that message. He fucking ghosted me. Shut up. He basically read it. Yeah. Didn't reply. What?

And then I had this whole panic. It wasn't like, can we have sex tonight please? That you'd sent it to the wrong person. Fancy sex tonight or something like that. Right. Then I had this, and then I started checking where I'd sent it to. Yeah. And then I had this whole fucking panic that he was I had this, and then I started checking where I'd sent it to, and then I had this whole

fucking panic that he was in a business meeting and his phone was hooked up to the screens and it just popped up and I created this whole story around it, he never replied. I never saw him again, no I'm joking. So yeah, so when he got home that night, I'm like, did you get my text message? He's like, what text message?

He didn't even see it. If you were cool, you would have just sent him an aubergine emoji. He wouldn't know what that means, Lauren. Yes, he would. Lauren, he's 50 years old. Even my husband knows what an aubergine emoji means. I've started replying. I'm going to send him one now.

Go on. I'm actually going to send him one now and see if he does anything. He will. If he says, is it moussaka for dinner? I'm going to be so disappointed with him. Never make moussaka in my entire life. I'm sending it a few times so he doesn't think it's a mistake.

Shall I do the same? Yes. Yes, yes, yes. What if he replies and then I have to have sex? Okay. I've just sent it four times. My husband is online. I'm sending an aubergine and two peaches.

Oh, should I send a peach as well? What does that mean? Bum? No. No, no. Don't do that. Back away from the peach. Melon, melon.

What does melon mean? Boobies. No, I'm just sending an aubergine on its own. Okay. I'm going to see what happens. Well, my husband is currently driving, I think. Mine, I think, might be walking the dog or looking after oh oh he's seen it oh yeah seen it is he typing no any nothing no do you reckon he's very confused i think he thinks i've probably sent it that's

why i sent it four times so he knows it's not a mistake send it again send it again no no he's he's he's seen it send it again no then he'll definitely think it's a mistake he'll he'll reply no he won't think it's a mistake if you double text that's not the term I don't know what the term is double down sent it, oh, Adam's seen it. What's he saying? Nothing. I've sent it four times. He's seen all four. It's just online.

Okay. Any typing, your end? No, this one, this aubergine's being economic. Oh, no, he's seen it. Any typing? No. Oh, typing, typing. Oh, Adam's come offline.

Typing. No,, typing. Oh, Adam's come offline. Typing. No, not typing. I reckon he's like, can't believe his fucking luck. No, I think he's like, I thought you were recording. Why are you messaging me? He thought about typing, then thought the better of it. Anyway, I've got this new thing now when he sends me like domestic messages. Like? I got one last week. i've bought some drain on blocker i mean so i reply did we get here i reply with stop flirting

with me that's my new thing now and then it all and then if he does it again like i bought the one you told me the one with the picture of the elephant on the front I'm going to do our shower later and then I play like you're really turning me on and that's that's my new thing does he reply to that no no he doesn't he's completely ghosted the aubergine so is Adam so is Adam okay interesting completely interesting also well that's that's a result the class it's a real result the class rep what i'm also interested in is that it's like seven in the morning she's just got the shower presumably she's busy getting her kids ready for school but she has the wherewithal to think about posing for a nude selfie well when you're in a brand new relationship again it's been 20 years so yeah it's been a while but when you are i hear when you are in a brand new relationship, again, it's been 20 years, so it's been a while.

But when you are, I hear, when you are in a brand new relationship, I think your libido is running very, very, very high. At 7am. And I would imagine it's all you're thinking about. Well, if you've had, if you've seen them the night before and you've had a really nice time together. Then they might be there in the morning. You would wake up, let's say they went home you would wake up in the morning thinking oh i'm still in the thrusts of the lust that you've had the night before so she's probably thinking yeah i just want to carry this on i'm also thinking like if heaven forfend we had to go back to online dating now would we be expected to be doing this i couldn't i couldn't

i wouldn't i couldn't i wouldn't i shouldn't, I couldn't, I wouldn't, I couldn't. I wouldn't, I shouldn't and I couldn't. No, I shouldn't. Why shouldn't she? No, I don't mean her. I'm saying. Put it on the class group. No, I'm saying myself.

I wouldn't, I shouldn't, I couldn't. Why shouldn't you? Why shouldn't you? I just don't feel. Why shouldn't you? I just don't feel that anyone needs to be seeing that now. You know, they just don't. They just don't. You know, you just don't. They just don't.

You know, you are a 46 year old, immensely attractive woman. Why are you putting yourself down like that? I just, it's not nothing that people don't see to see. It's just that your husband doesn't need to see it because he's seen it millions of times. In all manner of ways. He's even seen it with babies coming out of it.

Like, you know, it changes a relationship. So true. he's even seen it with babies coming out of it like you know he has it changes a relationship so true this poor woman though can you imagine having to go to pick up or for both of them the woman that sent it i mean you would i think i'd get like my mom to go and pick the kids up or something for how many weeks forever yeah until the shame subsides Because at the end of the day, like, does it really matter? Does it really matter? We're all grown adults. I don't want the whole of the class to see my minge. Let me just put that out there for the record. Do you?

I'd rather they didn't. Okay. The other thing I really want to say, can I tell the story about the podcast that we were on yesterday? And the guy, the teacher, we were on yesterday and the the guy the teacher on the we did a podcast with a teacher right you're telling it i'm just telling it right and he told us this story that oh yeah he told us this story that in his school one day on the

school staff whatsapp debbie the dinner lady who was in her 60s and online dating accidentally sent a full frontal close-up minge photo no it wasn't a mint yes he never said he said it was a nude selfie he said you've elaborated he said this is the quote deb the dinner lady, sent a photo of her downstairs. And he said, you know that thing. I don't think he called her Debbie. Yes, he did. I don't think he called her Debbie. And he said, you know that thing when your WhatsApp photo is buffering

and you can't quite open it, but you see it's there. And he said, lots of the teachers were saying to each other, has Debbie made a lasagna? Poor Debbie. He said that the leadership team were on there.agna. Poor Debbie. He said that the leadership team were on there. Board members were on there. Everyone was on there. Debbie basically went full into it.

And I think Debbie did the right thing. And she said her phone had been hacked. We all know her phone hadn't been hacked. But I think that's the way you would have to play that. But what for? Oh, oh oh i've had a vibration come on no it's still my brother-in-law okay great okay so my husband's now ghosted me i've also been completely ghosted so yeah but they're probably confused probably i

told you you wouldn't know what the aubergine meant i told you mine knows what the aubergine means well then why isn't he answering more for for you. Maybe. I don't know. There could be a multitude of reasons. Maybe he's on his period. The thing is, Debbie the dinner lady had the wherewithal to say her phone had been hacked. Because unless you had been intimate with Debbie, you wouldn't be able to match the menge to the owner. But with the full nude selfie towel around the neck

posing on the bathroom floor, you know it's her. It's coming from Debbie. It's coming from Debbie. Yeah, but she could say her phone was hacked. This poor class rep lady can't say that. No, but you know like the certain size and shape of the woman and if everything...

I don't mean... If it all matched. I don't mean that. I mean, you would see like the beginnings of her legs and her stomach and things like that and you could probably match it up say yeah that's probably about right I don't know if I'd be doing that like serious detective work on the photo I think I'd just delete it to be honest I love the way you're doing like this forensic investigation of the

min shot but I don't think I'd be going that far my defense i've never been sent one no me neither so i don't know how i would react my feeling is i would just probably delete it because i don't really need to look at it and also i would feel embarrassed for her and i would want to be as respectful as i could towards her because she'll be absolutely crying with shame and i don't want to make that worse for her. No. So I'm just saying, if Debbie the dinner lady, let's say she's a... Debbie the dinner lady has sent a WhatsApp message of her minge, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You would know whether it was Debbie the dinner lady or not.

You would. If there was stomach and legs in it as well. And a few grey pubes. She might be bald. She's in her 60s. Chances are not. Why? I don't know.

That's very... No, don't... You shouldn't assume anything. She could be very on trend with her pubic hair. What is the trend for pubic hair? Is there a trend? There's always... The current trendic hair what is the trend for pubic hair is there a trend there's a current trend there's always a trend for pubic hair how do you know this how do you seem very up on this how don't you know this you were the birth doula you must have seen trends with pubic hair you must have seen it all right well you must have seen trends over the

years you were what a doula for 16 years yeah so you must have seen trends over the years. You were what, a doula for 16 years? Yeah. So you must have seen trends coming and going with pubic hair. You must have. Some were bald, some were the landing strip, some were the fall. It goes from bald to bushy and everything in between. That's what I'm saying. I've seen it all. Right. I didn't really find it came in trends. It was just individual. When I was first dating Adam, the trend was all off.

I don't know if that's still a trend. I don't really ask my friends what they do with their pubic hair. Don't you? What do you do with your pubic hair? Come on then. Are we really having this conversation? No, we're not. Any advice for class

rep mum? Who? Which one? Class rep mum. Well, it's not class rep mum. David the Dinner Lady isn't my problem. Class rep mum? Is it the Class rep mum. Well, it's not class rep mum. Don't be the dinner lady isn't my problem. Class rep mum. Is it the class rep that sent the photo or is it the class rep that's writing to us? The class rep sent the photo. Another mother in the class has written to us. It's the mother that's writing us,

what should she do at pick up? I would say just be, you know what I would do? I would be as normal as you possibly can and just make her feel better. That's what I would do. I would give her normal as you possibly can and just make her feel better. That's what I would do. I would give her a wink across the playground and mouth nice tits. And I'd leave it there. Yeah, I think that's great.

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All right, Nicole, I'm ready for our next question. Okay, this is so great, Lauren. So this is our second dilemma from our listener. It's called, I can't believe I texted him. Oh, there's a listener it's called i can't believe i texted him oh there's a thing this week i can't believe i texted him yeah bad whatsapps right i've had the same window cleaner for a few years and he is the loveliest guy he's called sam and he runs the business with his two sons i love that it's a small independent family business and they are truly so lovely to deal with and always happy and upbeat the only issue is he's not the best window cleaner oh and he tends to leave my windows smeary oh and once he's left i always find myself with an e-cloth finishing the

job off where is this going a bad joke here but i won't where is this going i feel like is this going somewhere really really rude it feels like he's gonna come in like see her or something no no you've got such a dirty mind well it's a window cleaner i'm just thinking like 1970s bad porn type thing after a while i got a bit sick of it and decided to find a new window cleaner oh she's binning him off so i bravely sent a message saying that i no longer needed his services. Okay. She says, I lied a little bit and said it was for financial reasons and couldn't afford to have the windows cleaned anymore. He is such a lovely guy.

I couldn't bear the thought of upsetting him or his sons. Okay. After I sent the text, I went onto my street WhatsApp group and asked for some window cleaner recommendations. I got a few numbers and texted one of them saying I was looking for a new window cleaner and mentioned the road I lived in. Immediately, I got a reply. It said, is this Emma? This is Sam. I thought you couldn't afford it anymore, but I'm very happy to continue.

She texted the same window cleaner. That she just told she can't afford. I had accidentally texted the same window cleaner. Oh, Emma. Hand over eye emoji. Oh, Emma. Currently, he is booked to come in

for next week. Help. Emma, smear or no smear, you're stuck with this guy for life now. Him and his sons and your smeary glass. That's amazing. She's just stuffed herself there.

That's amazing. Well, my first question is, why wasn't his number in your phone? Have you got your window cleaner's number in your phone? Yeah, of course I have. Actually, I don't think I have. My window cleaner, I know you won't believe it, but it true his name's fabio oh shut up you're such a that is a lie lie lie okay here we go look does he look how he should look with a name like fabio fabio window cleaner okay does he look like a No. Oh. He looks more like a sort of, I don't know, Martin, Jason, Jack, John.

He is actually called Fabio. I've actually got quite a nice window cleaner. And he is lovely, can I just say. Fabio or mine? Fabio is the nicest. Oh, I've met yours. You always say I fancy my window cleaner. You do.

I do. You mildly, you mildly fancy one of your window cleaners let's not lie we've both sat in the garden and you've given him the side eye i have never given him how very I am getting very hot sweaty I have never given my window cleaner the side eye ever well the eye you know just like no no you've done this you're like no no what like as in like to me to me to me oh to you oh to you not to him i just think it's only because i told you before that i that i think he's kind of good looking in a not good looking way i know what you you mean, but I just think it's the window screen.

So then when he turned up, you then said, oh, is that the one you fancy? And then I got really embarrassed. Yeah. I didn't say it really loudly. Oh,

hi, are you the one that Nicole fancies? She said, he's a really nice guy. You've got my window screen. so nice. So nice so nice mine's also nice i think they just generally tend to be nice guys i think they probably maybe they just really enjoy their work they're outside they're physical all day not scared of heights that must be nice that must be nice not to hold them back in life yeah you know they probably maybe there's not that much stress to cleaning

windows or probably running the business there's is a lot of stress. It's probably quite satisfying as well. They start dirty, they end clean. It's probably quite nice. Oh, stop it. Yeah, so I do like my window cleaner and I wouldn't want to bin him off. That would be terrible. Oh, poor Emma. Poor Emma.

I'm sorry, Emma, but that was totally your own fault. Well, firstly, put your window cleaners number in your phone yeah that's the first thing yeah secondly i think you're just gonna have to suck it up and clean your own windows and pay him 35 quid a week or whatever he wishes to do it because he's so nice maybe maybe you could request I mean how would you even get out that you couldn't you'd have to say you were moving house but then you know you'd see him in this dream but she texted him immediately after she's Emma so now she's gonna have to see him yeah knowing that she binned him off and then

accidentally texted him again he's gonna know the same cool isn't he yeah of course so what would you do nothing just say nothing just chalk it up to like being a bit of an idiot well i mean if it was my relationship with my window cleaner oh yeah well we have a catch-up do you yeah we do it's lovely we do i just make Fabio a tea. Yeah. Milk and wine sugar. Yeah. Oh, you know what tea he has. I don't know what tea. He kind of just gets on with it. My window cleaner's called Anthony. Okay. Hi, Anthony.

I'm sorry, that's so embarrassing. Nicola enjoys your sudsy wash. Can you imagine if he listened to this? He might. He's never going to listen to this. His wife might. I don't know. Does he have a wife? I don. He's never going to listen to this. His wife might. I don't know. Does he have a wife?

I don't know. I haven't got that far. Okay. I would imagine he does. Does he wear a wedding ring? I haven't looked, Lauren. I'm not that... Oh, you've looked.

I'm not that invested in the whole thing. Okay. I'm not that invested. Okay. I think we just leave it there before you get into any more trouble. Okay, so that's our week's episode on 40ish. Thank you so much for being here.

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