A Bit of Optimism - The Smartest Way To Be Stupid with comedian Matthew Broussard

Episode Date: November 11, 2025

If you feel stupid while learning something new, you’re doing it right. But if you keep doing the same thing over and over hoping it’ll suddenly make sense - that’s on you. The trick isn’t to ...push harder; it’s to find a new teacher, a new explanation, a new way in.That’s exactly how Matthew Broussard approaches comedy - and everything else. A stand-up comedian, math nerd, and former financial analyst, Matthew is obsessed with learning and cracking the formula behind how things work. He treats every joke like an equation, testing, refining, and solving for laughter.He’s the creator of Monday Punday, a puzzle webcomic and app, and has been featured on The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon, Conan and Comedy Central’s Roast Battle. He’s also made appearances on The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel and The Mindy Project. His storytelling, including his viral tales about his mother-in-law, proves that logic and vulnerability can live in the same sentence.In this episode, we explore the overlap between comedy and leadership—the art of experimenting, iterating, and connecting through honesty. We talk about the hidden work beneath success, the difference between purpose and perfection, and why laughter might just be the purest form of optimism.This is A Bit of Optimism.---------------------------This episode is brought to you by the Porsche USA Macan---------------------------Check out Matthew’s Youtube page for his full comedy special “Hyperbolic”: https://www.youtube.com/@mondaypunday---------------------------

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 My love for math and my love for comedy and science, I don't think they're separate entities. I was not an artist by training. I think an artist creates things whose value is measured subjectively. Stand-up comedy specifically sits at an odd intersection in that you could almost not qualify as art because every decision I make is focused grouped in real time. It's empirical. It's extremely empirical. I think that was my draw to it.
Starting point is 00:00:25 And instant results. Instantly. Like math. The solution is revealed in that most. And comedy, the solution is revealed in that moment. Hypothesis, conclusion, in a heartbeat. In a heartbeat. In a heartbeat.
Starting point is 00:00:36 I was surprised when I invited a comedian on the show that we would spend so much time talking about math. But it's to be expected. Matthew Broussard is a former financial analyst who, let's just say, got forced into stand-up comedy. I found his work on Instagram a whole bunch of years ago and am a huge fan. He's also the creator of Monday Punday, the official name of his channel.
Starting point is 00:00:59 name of his channel that is chock full of comedy and, thank goodness, not much math. This nerd at heart taught me an invaluable life lesson. At various times, we all feel stupid, which very often results in us actually believing we're stupid. I, for one, always thought that I was bad at math. But as Matthew explained it to me, I'm not stupid. I was just taught badly. In this episode, we talk about curiosity, finding good teachers, and mothers.
Starting point is 00:01:27 This is a bit of optimism. This episode is brought to you by Porsche and their new Macon. And when they reached out to us and asked if I would be comfortable to talk about the new Porsche McCann, well, let's just say I already owned one. That's actually my car. So the simple answer was yes. So I discovered you on the Instagram. Because comedians pop up in my feed, apparently.
Starting point is 00:01:57 The algorithm knows I like funny things. And so you were randomly thrust into my day. And I went down the Matthew Broussard rabbit hole. Like you like one and all of a sudden... I'm in your face. An hour later, I'm like, shit, I should start work. You are exceptionally smart. Thank you. I appreciate it.
Starting point is 00:02:19 I have to imagine that somebody has said to you at some point, you're too smart to be a comedian. What are you doing with your life? my parents have definitely said that i was i've i've yeah my my parents didn't want me to pursue comedy i was told from a very young age that i had above average math skills specifically and that was a very employable skill to have and that that skill was luckily fostered quite strongly and I was able to learn. I was also very curious. I was pretty self-motivated with it. I went to college for it. And it really wasn't until I tried an open mic that I even conceived
Starting point is 00:03:02 of the notion that I could do anything else with my life besides use math. Math to make money. Because you talk about math principles in your comedy sometimes. So we know that you know math. You also seem to like science and you have an exceptional grasp of other things. I guess it's part of memory, you just, I mean, I mean, we were having coffee before, you know, before when you arrived, and we're talking about the oxidization of coffee in a metal container. I mean, the fact that we're having this conversation is ridiculous, you know? Yeah. And it went beyond tastes better, not in metal. You know, like, the point is, is I'm so curious how you picked the path of greater risk. More joy, perhaps. That's a question, I guess. Yes.
Starting point is 00:03:50 thank you like is this a conversation about do the thing you have aptitude for versus follow your follow your dreams and follow your passions i so i was i think more pragmatic about it than most i had my first job out of college i was working uh as a financial analyst but not not to the not wall street like easy hours not the craziest pay nine to five i made spreadsheets for the most part. I didn't feel a sense of pride in what I did. It was it was private wealth management. My job was to make rich people richer and I didn't have a product they created. So some part of me felt a little empty doing that. Perhaps if I had been an engineer or a coder and there was an actual product I was creating. I could have taken more pride in that. But I started doing open mics and
Starting point is 00:04:36 I saw just just for fun. Just for fun. Well, I mean, I thought wouldn't it be cool to do this full time, but I knew the odds were very low. And I said, let's try it. And the information was muddled at first, but there was an overall positive trend that I might have been towards the higher end of aptitude for a beginner. And I told myself, just keep noting where you stand against the ranks and how that extrapolates towards a career in this. But hold on for dear life to the career path you've worked very hard to have because I was still young, but stepping away from that could hurt and I mean I could never potentially get back to the same right level that I was on on track for so you were parallel pathing it until one much as I could until one path revealed that
Starting point is 00:05:25 this is a risk worth taking yes well what actually happened was comedy cost me my job in finance so I was kind of burning the candle at both ends and oh uh through uh some mistakes on my parts and comedy happens late at night if you're an open mic guy yes and in California and trying to trying to do more and more. And it was because comedy was going fairly well that I was trying to move and trying to do more than I should have been doing. I ended up fairly losing my job. And that was the worst day of my life. I think it was October 4th, 2013. I was in California. I didn't have a place to live. I was saying with a friend, everything I was in my car and had to figure out like what I was going to do. And I said, well, this is, you know, my bank account is now my shot clock. So let's
Starting point is 00:06:11 really go for it. And honestly, not that harrowing. Things kind of worked out within like two months. I started booking college gigs. I'm always fascinated by people who, I mean, show business is a hard business. And I'm curious if the internet has made it easier or harder for you, because yes, exposure is easier. I mean, case in point, here we are because of the interwebs, because of social media, but at the same time, there is so much. There's so many open mic night, you know, little, some talent too. There's some talented people, but there's, so is it better, or worse, or just different challenges? There's a lot to it's unpacked. Their comedy is, stand-up comedy is the beauty of it is there's low barrier to entry. The horror of it
Starting point is 00:07:00 is there's low barrier to entry. Right. Meaning you are fighting through swarms of people. An actor at least goes through acting school and has some audition process. Hopefully, musicians have to have the aptitude to play an instrument or sing. Anyone can do it. And now anyone can post it online. Comedy is like anyone can stand on the stage and perform. Yes. And there's also no training for comedy besides getting on stage and performing. There's no school or class you can go to. You have to be good. You have to be on stage a lot. But to be on stage a lot, you have to be good. So it's a very difficult track to get started in.
Starting point is 00:07:33 The internet, though, the interesting thing with the internet was I was very fortunate in the early days of my stand-up. I was favored by the industry, Comedy Central, Conan. I got put on a lot of shows, which was nice. It didn't translate into having a fan base. Those are the waning days of media, not for me at least. Some luck, some recognition, but I wasn't selling a ton of tickets off of that. Social media wasn't the way comedians were exposed back then. And then the pandemic hit, and then that was really the end of that.
Starting point is 00:08:06 Those things don't make stars anymore. I've never been on Netflix. That might be a route, but even that's becoming less of a sure thing. Things changed for me on the business end when during the pandemic, I realized Comedy Central was asleep at the wheel in terms of copyright issues. So I went back. I took my half hour. I took my cone and set. I took every set I did on television.
Starting point is 00:08:27 You pulled that footage off of YouTube and started cutting it up into Instagram reels and TikToks, and that's when people started knowing my comedy and sharing my comedy and recognizing me. So it was an interesting lesson. And rather than feeling defeated by this, looking at it as an opportunity to use that footage to, you know, I believed in this thing I'd already done. And then I thought maybe if I can just get people to see this, I could start making an audience for myself. And that, that worked to an extent. To an extent. Why is it and obviously, that's where the wheat and the chaff separate because you get more likes, you get more forwards, the algorithm favors you, you'll do better. You'll get a, you'll get a
Starting point is 00:09:05 following. I have a theory, which I'm, that I think comedians make great actors. You know, you look at people who, with backgrounds and comedy that became great actors, you know, Jim Carrey, Rob Williams, Robin Williams, Jamie Fox, these are comedians. Michael Keaton. Michael Keaton, really? Was he really? Was he really? Yes. Tom Hanks started doing comedy Not a stand-up But that was his So all of these
Starting point is 00:09:35 Especially the ones who did stand-up Michael Keaton didn't know Especially ones who do stand-up I think they have the ability To become great actors Because they get This is my theory Because
Starting point is 00:09:45 Vulnerability and humiliation Are something they're attuned to Like they have been Every comedian has bombed Every comedian has been humiliated Every comedian has stood there Knowing that it is going Incredibly badly
Starting point is 00:09:57 And you have to finish your set and what a great actor has to tap into is the ability to be that vulnerable that sort of to persevere and comedians just have a good training to be good actors. Comment. Can I disagree?
Starting point is 00:10:16 Of course. It's a theory. It's a great theory. The theories are to be tested. I think you're right and the beauty of comedy is the humiliation, is the vulnerability. I really don't think great comedy can last very long. without that, without that typically yet vulnerability that makes other people feel less
Starting point is 00:10:35 alone. Here's what I think separates stand-up comedy, potentially and potentially why I'm not as good of an actor because of being a stand-up comedian. If you were giving someone a massage and they were just completely silent, would you know what you were doing? You might be good at it. You might not. What if they were telling you that's the spot, go harder there, and even moaning or going, ow, when you hit bad spots? Which person do you think you would give a better to the vocal one. I like, if I can be a bit long-winded here, my love for math and my love for comedy and science, I don't think they're separate entities.
Starting point is 00:11:12 I was not an artist by training. I think an artist creates things whose value is measured subjectively. Stand-up comedy specifically sits at an odd intersection in that you could almost not qualified as art because every decision I make is focused grouped and real time. It's empirical. It's extremely empirical. I think that was my draw to it. And instant instantly. Like math, the solution is revealed in that moment. Yes. And comedy, the solution is revealed in that moment. Hypothesis, conclusion, in a heartbeat. In a heartbeat. And then you can iterate endlessly. I didn't, I'll change the same word. Yep. I'll change one word. And I'll try
Starting point is 00:11:52 three different words in the same joke and go, okay, based on a lot of data, noisy data, but data, I know this word is the funniest and that's not the whole process obviously you have to trust yourself more than that because there's too many variables but that process is really wonderful to me and I think it allows maybe not most artistically inclined people to be somewhat better at stand-up because someone tells you when you're good and bad. The reason I struggle with acting, especially film acting, is because I don't know what I'm doing well or poorly and when my brain hears silence it panics and thinks it's doing something wrong. I think theater actors, the other side of that is standard comedians and theater actors also have had lots of time knowing when they're doing well and knowing when they're doing poorly and then it starts to become craft. Yes, and unconscious competence, the highest level of before. Right.
Starting point is 00:12:43 Yes. So that's very neat to me. And just looking at it more of a science and empirical feedback loop. Little end narcissism, not big end narcissism, but there's a little end narcissism to that. right, which is feed me, feed me, feed me, right? I think a lot, yeah. I think a constant need for validation, yeah. And is that an insecurity or is that, is it a bug or a feature?
Starting point is 00:13:11 Oh, both. Yeah, I think if I could properly validate myself without external sources, I don't think I would need to do stand-up comedy. I think it's a need for validation. I think it's a whole, and I think it's probably common. in other entertainers and potentially even business people? Would you agree that is something on your side?
Starting point is 00:13:32 Some of them, I think the ones that are more money-driven, the ones that I've met that are very, very money-money-driven, for them, the amount of money that they can achieve or the stock price they can drive, whatever it is, is a direct validation that they're good, smart, et cetera, even though there may or may not be that correlation. It's the only yardstick they can find.
Starting point is 00:13:51 And it's an empirical yardstick, and it's a measurable yardstick it's a yardstick that they can hold up to somebody else and be like see right
Starting point is 00:14:00 and somebody goes I disagree they're like but you're wrong because here's what it says on the spreadsheet yes so
Starting point is 00:14:07 so this plays to the trope that comedians are all a little broken yes yeah I don't I think that's but broken is maybe
Starting point is 00:14:19 overstating it overstating it but but the but that need for that need for that need for external validation. But who doesn't have that? I guess it's just, is the need for validation higher than the fear of failure? And I guess for comedians, that's because I think a lot of people, I guess a lot
Starting point is 00:14:34 of people are very afraid of stand-up, but to me, the result was so juicy that it was worth falling on my face. Right. Right. Yeah. The benefits outray the risks, which is why you do it. Do you get a rush out of speaking publicly? Is that like, you must enjoy it. I think any, but I think there's no avoiding the adrenaline standing in front of huge audiences sometimes there's no avoiding the enjoyment of the adrenaline and I think what separates the good ones from the mediocre ones is for some that adrenaline translates into fear and anxiety and for the good ones we've learned to translate the adrenaline into presence and energy and focus and it's all about you so the adrenaline is my friend yes it makes me better at what I do
Starting point is 00:15:22 but I mean of course of course it feels good nobody can deny that and of course I like it when I get it the question is do I need it and I don't what is the part of what you do that is the most satisfying so I am driven the the hard thing for my work is it and when you make the difference between sort of the the the scientist and the artist you know the empirical versus the subjective, which is, though I have empirical metrics, you know, I have views of videos and I have forwards and I have, you know, book sales and those things are indicators to me. But the thing that drives me is impact. What means the most to me is that I'm undoing everything Jack Welch ever did. Like, I want to reverse everything that man broke in capitalism. The why? Yeah. Yeah. But like
Starting point is 00:16:18 I have a, I have a, I'm chipping away, you know, and, and, like, the people that drive me and inspire me, so like, the, all the founding members of the American women's suffrage movement, all died before the first woman voted. None of them, none of them, none of them, none of them lived to see a woman vote. What I'm, what, the reason that inspires me is they still never gave up. It was never in their grasp, yet they continued because their metric was momentum, not result. They obviously wanted the result. They would have preferred it happened in their lifetime. Of course, we know all these things. But the ability to measure momentum and have the peace of mind to know that upon my death, others will take this torch and continue
Starting point is 00:17:08 without me, and that means my work was worth it. That to me is super inspiring. That's very noble. That's really wonderful. I think my ego is too strong that I need to see it and get credit for anything I'm a part of. So I'm not a good person. But that's lovely. It's like generational starships. I read a lot about, like in sci-fi, it's like a common thing in sci-fi, a spaceship will take off towards whatever other star and the original habitants know they will die before it gets there. But the children, their children's children might see the new world. Don't get me wrong. And there's no nobility here. I like instant gratification.
Starting point is 00:17:46 I like results. Like, you know, I like all those things. You know, it's not an either or, it's a both. And the mindset, the infinite mindset that's required to have that has some very different standards, which is, I have no choice but to rely on people, need people, trust people. I have no choice. I can't be a lone wolf. It just, then it would never work.
Starting point is 00:18:12 Right. And so, and again, not better or worse. And I think the opportunity for all of us is to understand where we're selfishly driven, totally fine, and where we're not. We interrupt this episode to have an ad with authenticity. This episode is brought to you by Porsche and their new McCann, which is my actual car. I had it before they called. I didn't want to make some ridiculous over-the-top car commercial. So instead, we went out to a closed track to have a little fun.
Starting point is 00:18:54 And just to keep me humble, they brought along a race car driver Patrick Long. And if I'm really honest, it did get a little over-the-top. So I'm not going to lie, right? So I have a Porsche Macon 4, an electric Porsche, and it has three modes. It has comfort, sport, and off-road. I thought the off-road setting was a joke. It's a frickin' Porsche. It's a race car pedigree.
Starting point is 00:19:23 Like, they put it there, I don't know, in case there's some wet leaves on the road. You know, but we're now about to do an off-road test here where I'm going to drive up an extremely steep dirt road and so I think of that we're gonna come down that that's ridiculous I'm about to eat my hat so basically the radar is flashing because it thinks I'm gonna hit another car that's how steep this this road is that I'm going up where's my handles the fact that I'm going up a hill and I can't see anything but sky and I'm convinced that like I'm gonna go over the top here and die but here it goes this this great this is amazing we're about six eight six
Starting point is 00:20:06 stories up in the air right now. This is ridiculous. I'm just like looking straight down at the ground. This is so ridiculous. It's wild. Ridiculous. It's so wild. That was incredible.
Starting point is 00:20:20 I'm not going to lie. I thought the whole thing was a farce and it's not. Like you said, the grip. I feel like there's these claws or like a spider, how it sort of just grabs whatever it can as it's coming up or down. That's super cool. You did a great job there. Oh, thank you very much.
Starting point is 00:20:36 Do you still do math? Yes. Like for fun? I tutor. Oh. Which is great. At what level? I'm lucky.
Starting point is 00:20:51 There's this volunteer organization I work through. College. So I greedily go for kind of the classes at very much the end of my range. Because those are more fun than going back to the earlier stuff. But a college, a lot of like engineers, calculus, calculus, Calc 2, Calc 3, linear algebra. Wow. Those are the fun stuff.
Starting point is 00:21:10 I'm trying to do something. I think it's like maybe like a partial differential equations this semester. And I'm like really having to catch up between sessions on stuff I didn't learn that well the first time. It is amazing how opposite we are. You don't like math? I don't dislike it. I don't have an instinct for it. Like I can, I can, I never, I'm very proud of this actually.
Starting point is 00:21:33 I've managed to go through all of high school and college and never took. calculus. So I don't know anything about calculus. I don't know what it is. I understand algebra. I understand geometry. And trigonometry, you start to lose me. Trigonometry sucks. There's some bad stops along the way. It's like a series. There's going to be episodes that are duds, but you look at it in its entirety. Calculus I know nothing about. Calculus is a function. The function is you put in X, you get a Y, right? And you can get a curve with that, right? Yeah. Calculus is just, well, how steep is that curve. That's it. And what's the practical application of calculus? The steepness of a curve would represent the, oftentimes the speed. If position, you're looking at position, the steepness is the
Starting point is 00:22:17 speed. So the application is physics and things like that? Physics, a lot of, I mean, physics, chemistry, a lot of stuff. Finance and then speed and then acceleration, if you take another, if you go another level deeper, it's acceleration. But if you reverse that process, if you have the graph of speed, then you take the area underneath it and that gives you the distance. That's That's basically calculus in a nutshell. I have to say that's interesting. Now, I could really, this is what I'm really passionate about. If I could restart and didn't have to do comedy and wanted to do another dream, it's that
Starting point is 00:22:49 math education is, we're doing it very wrong. What good mathematicians, I believe, possess is the ability to hold big pictures in their mind and manipulate them, which is a good gift, and it gives people. some abilities, but what I think is needed is just making those pictures. Those pictures don't exist. Those videos don't exist. There's concepts I learned in college that I thought I knew and I went to the process and I struggled to learn them and I applied them. And then now, 20 years later, I'll see a 10-second video on YouTube. And I go, that's what that was? That's what was happening? You never showed me that. You never showed me in three dimensions with colors and moving images
Starting point is 00:23:34 what was happening. And now that I see that, everything I did is unlocked. If you just had those visuals, not everyone's going to understand math, but if you had the proper, we're teaching math with a static image drawn on a chalkboard. It should be done by the people at Pixar. It should be dimensions of time, three dimensions of space. And we're limiting to zero dimensions of time, two dimensions of space. Here's what I'm taking away from this. This is, and light bulbs are going off, right? And now I realize we're actually more alike, which is, What you and I both do is we take complex ideas and we make them that people understand it either so that you have clarity or you can find the humor in the thing, right?
Starting point is 00:24:14 Because it's the kind of the same thing, right? Which is you're pointing out the absurdities of life, the absurdities of your mom, and it's presented in a way, like what makes a great comedian from an okay comedian is that you're presenting in a way that I can relate to the story, which is why I find it funny. It's not just the story, right? It's not just the funny thing that happened. The telling of it matters. And math and adjacent subjects have always been, for those who have the math mind, quote unquote.
Starting point is 00:24:48 It never occurred to me that it was just being taught badly. That if you taught me math the way you tell jokes or the way I explain an idea. Because people think that I'm joking when I say this, but I think of myself as an idiot. And I mean that 100%. There is not an ironic, nothing, there's nothing ironic about that, which is as a kid with ADHD in high school,
Starting point is 00:25:17 I struggle to read, I struggle to study. I couldn't learn by rote. And so I still got to pass high school. So you have two options. Fail or figure it out. So what I learned to do, was be really good at asking questions, get really good at listening.
Starting point is 00:25:34 I had to attend class. I couldn't cut school because if I cut... And when I was in college, I had to choose professors who were good at explaining because I could never rely on the book to catch up. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:43 Right? And that skill of learning to survive and turn my ADHD into an advantage rather than a deficit gave me this capacity in the future, which is when I hear complex things that people are trying to explain to me, I have no fear. I can't have any fear. It's a survival thing. It's not a courage thing. I have no fear to say, I don't understand. Can you explain it differently? And then they'll try again. I'll say, is this what you're trying to say? And I'll say it in simple terms that I can understand. Yeah. And I go backwards and forwards and backwards and forwards until I be like, and I'm drawing little pictures and using metaphors and analogies simply because my little brain is trying to understand this complex thing that you're trying to explain to me. And eventually I understand it because I've boiled it down to something very, very simple.
Starting point is 00:26:30 So simple that not only do I understand it, but I can then tell somebody else, and then they go, got it. And I get all the credit, which is not fair, for being the explicit, but I was just trying to understand the complex thing in the first place. And where it fails is when the person is trying to explain it to me and they can't, then I can't understand it because I don't have that analytical kind of mind that just understands sort of math and equations. No, no. People don't understand it quickly. This is, I think, the great myth of people who... No, no, people do. People can do math in their heads very easily. No, no. I, like, this was said by someone else.
Starting point is 00:27:06 I think it was said by Matt Parker of stand-up math. But he said that we all, anyone who studies math is constantly bombarded by frustration, but you embrace the frustration, you know that you're going to feel pain and you're going to feel anger. And then in one moment, all of those negative feelings are going to snap to positive feelings. And that's the moment of understanding. and what people who pursue any kind of field of study know is that you have to look it in the face and not back down. That's the moment where...
Starting point is 00:27:36 Where can you adjust? So, like, when I look at financial information, like, for the company, right? I always ask the finance person, show me a chart and a graph. Like, show me, I want to see the visual. I want to see the trend. I want to see the profit and loss done in pretty pictures because then I can understand it. when you just show me huge spreadsheets of number,
Starting point is 00:27:56 I just gloss over. Sure. I struggle. But some people, like, they look at those huge spreadsheets, and they're like, ah, you're one of those people. No, I mean, well, the analog for me would be, I'm constantly trying to learn new things in math, and the first read will always make, I'll feel like an idiot.
Starting point is 00:28:13 But I know, like, you should feel stupid. Feeling stupid is part of it. And admit that you're stupid. Admit you don't know. And I will look at one thing reading, go, I don't like that. And I'll look up seven different ways of explaining it. Until the seventh one, I'm like, this time I get it.
Starting point is 00:28:26 And I'll also have to read it over and over again. I don't think that it's necessarily some people just inherently get it. They're just willing to admit they're stupid. And like you're saying, I love it, keep simplifying it until there's one aspect of it you get. And then what's the next thing you can add to that? What you just said was absolute genius. No, no, no, no. Give me too much.
Starting point is 00:28:46 No, no, no, no. What you just said was absolute genius, which is a profound, like, which is what we do when we feel stupid is we, is we watch or read the same thing over and over and over again to try to understand it each time blaming ourselves for being stupid. What you're saying is, and this is the genius, show me seven different ways to explain it until I understand it, right? Which is whether it's a leadership concept or a financial concept or a scientific concept or any kind of concept that you're struggling with, it's okay to feel stupid, it's okay to maybe reread it once or twice, but then go seek out. And this is where the internet is the greatest gift.
Starting point is 00:29:24 It's wonderful. Which is you can go down a YouTube rabbit hole and have, and you can start, you can hit play and be like, eh, yeah, and you can play until somebody, somebody, it makes sense to you. And then you'll understand this difficult concept. And by feeling a little less stupid in that moment from that explanation, A, you're learning how you learn. But B, now you have the grit because you're not, you're not blaming. The patience and the humility. Because here's what we're doing, right? I feel stupid.
Starting point is 00:29:52 It becomes a, it becomes a story to ourselves. I am stupid and then you just I don't do math I don't understand math I'm no good at math what the story should be is I have yet to find somebody
Starting point is 00:30:03 who can explain math in a way to me that I can understand it that is the correct mindset plus some patience plus rereading it I like people thought that we were going to be funny
Starting point is 00:30:13 the the we have Matthew Brousard and we're going to talk about learning but no but this is I never want anybody to feel dumb again. This is going to be my mantra. I'm going to say...
Starting point is 00:30:27 Or we're all dumb. We all feel dumb all the time. But the mantra is don't blame yourself, blame the way you're being taught. Yes. And have patience with those teaching. And then you're talking about communication.
Starting point is 00:30:41 There's two... Learning takes someone who's patient enough to learn and somebody who's patient enough to teach. And again, I'm very familiar with concepts can you tell me a different way? Can you tell me a different way? Can you tell me a different way?
Starting point is 00:30:52 Because what might unlock it for me? might not for another person. I've been doing something lately that's been something I didn't do in college. I'm sorry, the internet comment. I think about that so often of when I was in college and I was trying to understand a concept and one of my harder classes.
Starting point is 00:31:08 Singular value decomposition, let's say that one, because it sounds smart. The only thing I could do was go to Wikipedia and read the page for it. You know who wrote that page? My professor. My professors in college wrote all the Wikipedia pages for the concepts we were learning
Starting point is 00:31:21 because it wasn't widely shared knowledge at that point. Now if I wanted to understand that, there's seven YouTube videos I could watch. And perhaps the fifth one is when I really get it, because they did a good job with the visuals. I've also been reading math textbooks just to learn things I've always wanted to learn at a snail's pace, but something I didn't realize was I thought I was just not good at reading math textbooks because I'll read one page, think I get it, and the second page, my brain goes to mush. Like the endurance over two pages, it's like when you're bad at swimming and you try to swim you get across the pool you're like that was easy and then you can't make it to the next wall
Starting point is 00:31:56 and then I talked to someone who is a math PhD they go that's how it is one page a day is a great rate it's just that hard wow and and the people who accomplish it forget how hard it was or want you to think they're smart and it's that hard for everyone I feel that way about comedy every every line I have that makes the crowd laugh feels like a miracle and it's like I think how rarely I write two jokes in the same day yeah like every every punchline you're hear is one day of my life, and that was the accomplishment for that day. Even if it's just like three words, they get like a chuckle. It's such a, it's, what's, what's, who's famous line, if you saw the work put into it, it would not be impressive at all. Yeah, yeah. I think for me,
Starting point is 00:32:39 maybe for other standups, maybe not, it's just not an easy process. It's laborious, but that's what it takes to make something that's, uh, engaging. And I, I imagine you feel the same way about your work. It's just, uh, it's not easy. It's, it's, it's, my process is, it's, it's, my process is a little different. I'm curious, are you good at crowd work? Like, no. Okay. No, I need to learn how to listen better. I think that's the problem. Okay. Because the people who are good at crowd work when they're good at it, it's a thing to behold. It's cool. It's a thing to behold. They have, it's, that's, that's like a real zen state. You have to be calm. You have to make the crowd feel like they're okay. You have to take what they're saying, know when to ask another question or know when you have enough stuff
Starting point is 00:33:20 to put together and when to have emotional responses, when to try to be clever, when to just try to repeat back what's happening. I would love to be better at it. One thing that I love about your work is, first of all, super vulnerable. Like, you share things. I don't know if they're jokes or if they're true, because I know there's some truth, but I also know that, you know, when you get on a good idea, you can play with it. But I just watched a bit about your inability to please your wife. That is 100% true. I mean, like, does she want that out there? I understand that you don't mind.
Starting point is 00:33:56 I understand that you don't mind having it out there. There's two players in this game. She was a very good sport about that. For a while, I was like, can we talk about this? She was like, oh, that's a lot. And then I think at one point she was just like, you know what? It's a good thing to share with people who feel the same way, both men and women who struggle with that.
Starting point is 00:34:14 And it might make people feel more comfortable about themselves and more comfortable in the relationship, so it's a good thing to share with people. Yeah. I love vulnerable. I love, to me, it's my favorite part about comedy is when you can share something that you're embarrassed by, and now instead of being embarrassed by it, you feel a sense of community with other people who feel that.
Starting point is 00:34:31 Or you, you've, even if that doesn't work, then you've made people who don't have that vulnerability feel better about themselves for not having it. Right, right. So everyone wins. But it is, it is the quintessential court jest, court jester, right, which is, I'm going to say the thing that everybody's thinking, but I'm going to make it okay. I'm going to make it okay. Make people feel less alone.
Starting point is 00:34:49 I have to believe that a lot of your bits started conversations that were for good. And it's only because your work, I'm astonished how often you are so vulnerable, whether it's about yourself, your upbringing, even talking about, you know, racism in some of, and hot topics, you'll go there. And I just find it very impressive. I've so enjoyed, and I kind of remember how long ago it was when I first discovered your work. But I, I, I, your work is getting, for whatever it's worth. It's getting better and better and better.
Starting point is 00:35:21 Thank you. I really appreciate that. Yeah. Thank you. That's very kind. Was that always, were you always that kid that didn't mind being embarrassed? That didn't mind being embarrassed. So how did you learn it?
Starting point is 00:35:30 Kind of through stand-up. Early on in stand-up, I was just trying. When I started, I wanted to be brash and offensive because I thought that was cool. Andrew Dice Clay style. Yeah. And I kind of realized later that was more, that was not me being tough and edgy. That was me actually being weak and insecure, needing to put others down. to feel some sense of superiority.
Starting point is 00:35:52 Did it get laughs? Sometimes, sometimes, in front of other people who liked that. Of all people, James Comey's memoir was, it really shaped me. There was one chapter. I can't imagine a less funny person than former FBI director James Comey,
Starting point is 00:36:15 but he had, I think it goes to speak of how not funny people can sometimes have the best observations about comedy. He had a whole chapter talking about the sense of humor of the three presidents he worked under, which is Bush, Bush, Jr., Obama, and Trump. And he said, all three were notably funny guys, very funny people. Bush, Jr. and Trump would often make laughter at the expense of others, which did not equate to good leadership versus Obama would make jokes at the expense of himself. which would uplift others
Starting point is 00:36:51 and bring out the best in them. So, sure. Maybe. But anyway, moving on. Moving on. Ignoring the politics of that. Ignoring the politics of the comment. I get it.
Starting point is 00:37:02 The idea that, and that was also, for me, a great thing of a learning experience in that if there's going to be a victim to the joke, why not me? I'm the consenting party. Right. It's fun for everyone. It's a victimless crime.
Starting point is 00:37:16 Yeah. And not just victimless. It helps other people. I think I somewhat possess a bit of status that a comedian wouldn't typically possess. You take a picture of a comedian. You often think of like a dirt bag, someone down and out. I've had, I think to see me take a tumble is maybe a little more satisfying. Right.
Starting point is 00:37:38 Because I started falling from a little higher. Yeah. Yeah. So do you remember the first joke, the first risk you took at self-deprecation, this new style? Do you remember it? Yeah, I was doing jokes about looking like an 80s villain, and it was getting a laugh. And then people came up to me after the show, and you get a lot of great feedback from just drunk people. Not just empirical feedback during the show, but drunk people will come up and just really say blunt things.
Starting point is 00:38:02 And some guy was just like, yeah, you look like a douchebag, and I didn't like you. And then you started talking about looking like 80s villain. I'm like, oh, this guy's not bad. And I'm like, what if we just, what if we, instead of trying to do that with tricks, just say exactly what he's saying? and I think I was at Sacred Heart College and I was doing a show and I just said I look like a douchebag I'm guessing you already didn't like me
Starting point is 00:38:22 before I started talking and that was like oh I'm cutting straight to the chase there I'm acknowledging what they think of me before they've even put it together themselves and now they're more malleable because I've kind of
Starting point is 00:38:34 maybe subverted their expectations and shown awareness that they're like you take the reins actually if you're on top of things maybe you know what you're doing we'll let you you've taken yourself down a peg in a way that we find satisfying um yeah keep going huh and now it's and and does your mom know the way you talk about her yes uh she's uh fortunately
Starting point is 00:38:59 very uh she doesn't mind it she sounds like an absolute caricature i've i've barely painted the picture with my stand-up of how how well she is i've included the parts that are uh digestible uh she likes She doesn't mind anything. The basic part was the, I don't know if you saw the airport story. Oh, I saw the airport story. I can't stress how true that story is. Do you want to tell the airport story for those who haven't seen it on the YouTube?
Starting point is 00:39:26 I'll give the introduction. I was dropping her up at the airport and had to shortly thereafter come back and pick her up. She went to check in. They were giving her trouble over paperwork for bringing a dog in the plane. She forgot the word, I swear to God, she forgot the word manager and said, let me speak to your master and that was that was where the story starts yeah um she signed off on that i said are you can i talk about that and say she said yeah it's funny it is funny yeah i'm like you're you sure about that she was like yeah the one thing she doesn't
Starting point is 00:39:57 like is the birthday card which i recommend uh i can't do it here but yeah a birthday card she sent to my my wife um i i said mom this this note's really funny i'm going to read it on stage she goes sure no one's going to laugh and then she saw me do it live and people laugh it almost every sentence as I read it verbatim. And she goes, why are they laughing? I don't like this. What are they laughing at? I had to explain to her.
Starting point is 00:40:19 I'm like, they're not laughing at you. They're laughing at the vulnerability at you saying things we all think, but keep to ourselves. Yeah. What's next? What's the ambition? I'm not ambitious enough. Do you have vision or do you just keep doing the thing you love
Starting point is 00:40:33 and it keeps going in the right direction? I'm not good about all the things you profess, which I don't have the infinite game. I just have the next special and wanting to just kind of branch out a little bit at a time. Perhaps I'd be farther along if I had a bigger vision. What do we mean even be farther along? Like, like, what does that even mean?
Starting point is 00:40:52 Be on TV, be on a TV show and bigger crowds. Is that a thing? But is that, I mean, it's like, but you don't want to act. I would love, I love acting. I just find it challenging. Okay, okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. I would, my, I mean, my dream was to do stand up and put out specials. Okay. And I've really accomplished most of that. I could, there's room, but if I, if I, if I, if I, if me, when I started, saw where I am now, they'd be like, you're doing it.
Starting point is 00:41:15 I'd love to be on a sitcom. That's always been my dream. Okay. Because those perhaps shaped my life more than stand-up did, and I shouldn't admit that, but like 30 Rock, Parks and Rec, community, and then cartoons, Futurama, Adventure Time, those things hold such real estate in my heart. So to be involved with any of those would be the other, like the other box to check. And obviously, I want to keep making specials.
Starting point is 00:41:42 That would be really cool to keep putting out long-form stand-up content. Is stand-up comedy, could you ever walk away from it? I don't think so. I really like it. I really like the feedback from people and getting to go up there and say things and feeling less alone. I think our phones make us feel very, very isolated. It's this synthetic connection, these empty calories of human interaction that make us feel more depleted afterwards. The human-to-human part of it, I'd,
Starting point is 00:42:12 feel starved. It's kind of a last frontier, right? I mean, where you can interact with each other. And when I say into each other, I mean, it's up and down, you know, it's comedian to audience, but it's also audience to audience. We laugh next to each other. We look at each other. We elbow each other.
Starting point is 00:42:28 We point. You know, it's a, it's different than theater. Theater is a very lonely experience because you sit by yourself. Nobody can see you because you can't see anybody. You can only see the back of people's heads. The script is set. The script is set. And so it's very.
Starting point is 00:42:42 very different than theater. And to your point, which is where we come for entertainment and we do put our phones away and we have a couple drinks and we're forced to have a couple drinks and forced to order some food. Because that's the business model.
Starting point is 00:42:58 And it is, I don't think comedy is going away and I don't think live comedy is going away. Yeah, I don't think live anything is going away. I don't think anything's, we just don't have the substitute for, we think that, because we can look at something
Starting point is 00:43:11 and hear something, but it's the same of just even being here in person versus a Zoom, it's just more dimensions. It is more dimensions. What's next for you? How do you look at growth and? So I, I, and how do you balance growth with already feeling like you've done enough?
Starting point is 00:43:30 Okay, there's multiple questions there. I think of my work like an iceberg, right? So when I was starting, and I was just an idiot with an idea, like literally, accomplished nothing. No books, no TED Talks, no nothing. Nobody knew who I was. Nobody knew my ideas.
Starting point is 00:43:47 All I had was a theory of what the world could be like and what business could be like, which is basically an iceberg completely submerged. I'm the only one that can see it. And like the ability to explain it to a couple of people, so they go, oh, yeah, it's kind of like a tiny bit of iceberg sticking up. And so when people pay me compliments,
Starting point is 00:44:07 what they're looking is what they can see above the ocean. when I think about what work I have to do I still can only see what's beneath the ocean and so no matter what I've done or accomplished people will say nice things to me look at all the things you've done and I'm sort of always a little bit sort of like taken aback
Starting point is 00:44:23 because I don't think about it because what I think is like oh I still have so much to do you know and it's kind of like the way you talked about feeling stupid with the math which is I like learning curves I like difficult problems I like problems I struggle to wrap
Starting point is 00:44:40 my head around. I like finding different angles to it. And to me, what the iceberg represents is I still haven't cracked. I haven't cracked it yet. I've just sort of made some steps towards it. But for me, it's all about what still lies beneath. And like I said, undoing everything Jack Welch did, that's a real freaking, that's a job, right? So that's how I think about career and sort of accomplishment. But I also have a very, very different way of going about sort of my whole life, every performance review I ever had in every job I ever had, every single one of them said you're unfocused. And I believed it because everybody kept telling me, even growing up, studying, you're so unfocused.
Starting point is 00:45:28 And my work is semi-a-biographical. It's me trying to solve my own problems. And so the discovery of things like the Y and the discovery of things like the Infinite Game helped me understand that I am actually one of the most focused people I know I'm just focused on a different horizon than most people. And so the way I would describe it is
Starting point is 00:45:47 most people are obsessed with the route. I'm obsessed with the destination, right? For example, you walk outside your front door and you see your neighbor packing their car and you say to your neighbor, where are you going? They go vacation. And you go, cool, where are you going? They said vacation.
Starting point is 00:46:06 I'm like, no, no, no, no. Where are you going? I told you vacation. And you're like, fine. How are you going to get to this vacation? And they're going to, they say, well, I'm going to take 95. I'm going to drive 150 miles a day until I get there. And what they're telling you is the route. And that's what most people have. I'm going to get this kind of job. I'm going to make this amount of money. This is my career path. They have fixed roots, but not 100% clarity of where they're going. Right? And so the root is everything. have been very different, which is, let's say we're in California now, where are you going, New York? How are you going to get there? Don't know. And so it's very opportunistic. And so when a lot of people, for example, they're offered a job that pays more money, they're like, I'll take that one. It pays more money. And I go, well, will that one help me get to New York? No. Well, then I'm going to turn that one down. And so I realized where so many people are focused on the route, I'm completely agnostic. And if you're focused on the route, that means you're agnostic on the destination.
Starting point is 00:47:14 And I know too many people who spend a whole life climbing a ladder only to get to the end to discover they climbed the wrong ladder. This ties back to calculus. Say more. Okay. Multivirval calculus and then the class called optimization, I think about this a lot. You're trying to find the highest point. That's what optimization is.
Starting point is 00:47:33 You can walk north or west, right? You're just trying to pick based on two directions. Where's the highest point? Let's say you're walking on a hilly field at night and it's foggy. So you can't see when you're at the top. You're going to know when you're at the top because your feet are going to be flat on the ground. Maybe you're at the bottom, but you're going to, right? So what is the search algorithm?
Starting point is 00:47:52 Your search algorithm is you're going to walk around. And when it feels steep, you can feel your ankles bend a lot. You walk in the direction of the steepness. The more steep it is, the longer of a step you take. If it starts to flatten out, then you're near the top. That is what we do mathematically. The steepness, again, that's the slope and calculus. That is actually the math of it.
Starting point is 00:48:12 The problem is, what if there's another hill next to you that's higher? You need to wander off the hill to potentially find the highest point. You need to be able to go off that path and potentially explore other ones. So are you finding a local optimum or a global optimum? I think a lot about that when we're, and what we're optimizing for, what we're trying to maximize. Sometimes we look at, we're talking earlier about the empirical feedback if we say, oh, these results mean I'm doing well. I'm getting a lot of views on my Instagram reels. That's an indicator that I'm doing well. What if you get it wrong? A lot of people do. What if I'm doing well because I'm, what if you flip it, those views are the measure. And now you do everything you can to optimize that. You're going to do a lot of things that are clickbaity things. Bad things. Just not in the intention of what you wanted to create originally. Right. And you're, you're, you're optimizing, you're seeing higher and higher numbers, and you think that means you're doing better, but you have to kind of like get the, like you're saying, the destination in mind.
Starting point is 00:49:09 Right. Not, not the path. So you are more visionary than you give yourself credit because you won't do anything just for the view. I try to keep, I try to, I will obviously be corrupted by all of these things because I will look at the data, but I will try to reorient back towards what are you trying to make. Right. And that's just what I deem a quality product based on, I hope the crowd laughs and as long as I believe in it, that's what I'd like to keep making.
Starting point is 00:49:34 This is an interesting question, right? Which is for, and I think a comedian is a metaphor for a lot of people, right? Which is, I want to do something and I want to be rewarded very quickly to know that I'm good. And social media can hijack and corrupt that system. Yes. Which we know, right? Because of measurement. It's the same feedback loop, and it's instantaneous.
Starting point is 00:49:54 You get a like, you get a forward, whatever it is, you get a view, right? It's the same thing as a laugh. It's instantaneous. and the comedian who's obsessed with the laugh to the point of hurting themselves or hurting others versus having a point of view or some morality so what system do you have to not be hijacked by the click
Starting point is 00:50:22 the like the view the laugh's permitted even you're right because even your act can be even in the room be corrupted by just trying to make those people laugh as hard as you can and you want to do better than the comic before you and you're willing to do things that aren't your own standards. So what checks and balances are there to ensure that yes, you're getting more laughs for minute,
Starting point is 00:50:40 but there is a framework within which you're willing to operate and you're not willing to go outside, even if you could get a bigger laugh? Esoterically, my own moral compass, my own standards, right? That's harder to measure, though. More concretely, the respect of my peers and making other comics laugh. The respect of the peers that you respect.
Starting point is 00:51:00 Yes. Medians had a moment where someone goes, hey, great joke. You're like, thanks. And you look at who says it. You're like, I should cut that joke. So it's the respect of the peers you respect. Uh-huh.
Starting point is 00:51:15 The, yeah, the people you look up to liking what you do. You can also, you can't make that your whole thing. Right. Because that can also be an unstable solution to this equation. Right. Because now you're serving. their moral compass, their needs, their taste, not yourself. At the expense of the crowd and at the expense of your career.
Starting point is 00:51:34 Which is the equivalent of I'm going to do what my boss likes. I mean, again, this all translates to math for me. You have three different outputs, right? Respect of your peers, laughs for a minute, and let's say career success. And you need to put weighted coefficients in front of each one of them and then maximize that balanced equation. And then how do you factor in the hard-to-measure your own moral compass? the one that you refer to is the esoteric one
Starting point is 00:51:59 that's harder but because that can also is that just gut is that just feeling is that gut and feeling is that your wife coming going like revisit your earlier self and what your what your old standards were but also don't be so precious you don't I don't owe things to my 25 year old self he didn't have better taste than I do now see this is now this is where math fails me sure which is which is we both acknowledge that the, that the esoteric, the intangible, the ethereal thing matters, but it's harder to measure. Nobody else can see it but you.
Starting point is 00:52:36 How do you ensure that that thing has the correct weighting, which should be quite a high rating? Waiting, I mean, it should have quite a high weighting. Because we see it in the world, which is when stock price and profit and revenue are the only metric, we see ethical fading happening all over the place because the weighting is like I believe in objectivity I don't know I don't know I will steal one page from a great comedian named Mike Lawrence who said something to the effect of in comedy you're as successful as the biggest thing you say no to and saying no to things is really starting to really value the moments I say I don't want to do that because I don't like that that's not what I represent and that's a corruption of what I'm trying to do, and I'm going to say no to maybe it's a branded deal
Starting point is 00:53:26 or maybe it's a comedy festival somewhere. I guess saying no to things also, that isn't answering your question, but like saying no oftentimes for principled reasons is a really good exercise. But do you have an answer? How? I'm also curious because I feel like we're losing our souls, a lot of us, through that ethical fade. Can I do an experiment?
Starting point is 00:53:53 Please. I may be able, this may or may not work. Love the scientific method. Tell me a festival, a joke, anything that you were involved in your comedy career
Starting point is 00:54:08 that you absolutely loved that if everything you ever did from this point on was like that thing, you'd be the happiest person alive. my gut instinct is when I did Conan for the first time I was very proud of the material I chose and I was going to be happy either way because I did it and then it had a pretty big positive response which was just icing on the cake so having both those things go away do
Starting point is 00:54:35 doing the set I wanted to do with no restrictions without having to to to dumb it down or water it down in any way and then also getting rewarded for that that was that was one of my happiest moments in comedy, if that answers it. But you've done things before that you were proud of. You've done things where you had control over the set. You've done things that had a bump, you know, maybe even a bigger bump than Conan. What was it about that experience that stands out from all the ones that are very similar with very similar metrics that makes you want to talk about it now?
Starting point is 00:55:08 It was early. It wasn't my first, but it was early. It was a show where a lot of comics I really respected were. were booked for. So when I saw who did it, I'm like, those are people I want to be like. Those are people who are pushing comedy to new places. I also got to do a set that probably would have been very much rejected by any other late night booker. And I was surprised that Conan allowed I said Volvo eight times in a row. And that was neat to me. The joke had information that people learn. People learn things that they didn't know from it while I think getting decently high
Starting point is 00:55:44 lapse per minute. Probably to really answer your question, because it was the first time I did that and it paid off. And I feel like I've tried to do that every time since. And then I think maybe if there's another time, my set from 2021, I was wearing a denim shirt with floral embroidering on the back. That's the only way I can distinguish the set. But I also did material that was bold for the time in terms of politically being more honest at a time where that could potentially get me in trouble and saying how I really felt in a way that I think other people agree with but we're afraid to say. And again, I put it out there knowing it might not make a splash at all, but it also might really connect. And I felt it connecting as a result.
Starting point is 00:56:28 Tell me an early specific happy childhood memory, something I can relive with you. Not like we went to my grandparents every weekend, but something specific that I can relive with you. I went at 21, 23 in my 5K on a road race. I've been running a lot and the road race happened to be right in my neighborhood. So I knew the path. I'd run it most days, and I went a best time on a course that I was very familiar with. So, I was in middle school. Like, of all the things you did that you could have told me, what was it about this run that? I worked really hard for it, and I got a result I wanted.
Starting point is 00:56:59 And also might have just dipped under one of my rivals, PRs or something like that. So there's a competitor, you are, you are competitive. Yes. Any other outside of comedy? Anything stand out? From my childhood?
Starting point is 00:57:17 Childhood or even your financial analyst career. A happy, happy moment. Just something you loved being a part of, something you absolutely love being a part of. I do, I draw and I sculpts a little bit, but I rarely step out of the boundaries
Starting point is 00:57:32 of those two media. But I really liked, I made the sword from Adventure Time. I really like Adventure Time. And I looked up a tutorial and I got poster board and made like a really big sword and took days to make and lots of cutting and painting and stenciling. And when it came out, it was the biggest piece of art I've ever made. It was large and that was really fun and just a weird thing to do and no one pushing me
Starting point is 00:58:03 to do it and no real reason to do it. And I did it. Okay. So here's a thread. What's interesting in all three of those things required a lot of work, right? And it required a lot of self-motivation. And there was no particular pressure on you for any of those things other than yourself, right? It's 100% driven by you and the hard work that you're going to do is going to make that set good or bad. And in each one of those cases, you're willing to do the work to the point where you find great satisfaction and that you did it your way and you did it for yourself. You said it was my personal best. for this run that it, you know, this, it was, it was, it was, it was, there was a, it was, there was a learning curve that got you there. And in all of those, there was, there was absolutely accomplishment. But you, it's not like, it seems to me that you're not trying to accomplish just for the sake of accomplishment. You're not driven simply to win or be the best or outdo others. It's you like, I think the reason you like a metric, it's a
Starting point is 00:58:59 validation not of you or how good you are or how smart you are or how funny you are. it's a validation of the work was worth it. Right? And I think even the way you talk to me about calculus, which is, and the way you talk about, find somebody who explains it to you in a way that you can understand, find a better teacher. You're not dumb.
Starting point is 00:59:19 You just need to find a better teacher, which is, it's not just about grit. Because I think the way a lot of people talk about hard work is just about grind. You're not talking about grinding. You're talking about being smart the way you learn, and if you accomplish something, all of that effort of learning is worth it.
Starting point is 00:59:37 And that, to me, is the interesting dichotomy, which is, yes, you like the validation and yes, you like the laughs permitting, yes, all of that. But all of that is actually a recognition of the hard work that you've done. You even talked about the quotes that you've made here, which is if you knew how hard it was to get here, if you knew the effort that it took to get here,
Starting point is 00:59:58 you'd be very unimpressed by whatever the quote was. And even the way you talk to me about, like, you love tutoring because you want to teach people in a way that helps them access something. And when they get the A on the exam or the B or whatever it is, they're striving for it. When they understand the concept right there in front of me, that's the best moment. When they go, oh, that's it. It's the epiphany, right? And it's whatever the spark is that goes, that was worth it. The ethereal part for you seems to be in the bullpark of, you will know that you've done good work for yourself when,
Starting point is 01:00:32 the when whatever the world's metrics are look at you and go that's good well done well look at your time and that will inspire you to want to keep learning keep pushing keep doing more um because you'll discover that that it's not the it's not the it's not the result that becomes intoxicating it's earning the result it's doing the hard work to get the result that becomes intoxicating yes which is the difference between what you're doing and winning lotteries yeah i feel That was very astute. That felt very good to hear you say all of that. Thank you. Can I note a way in which I think we're actually kind of different? And I want to see if we could reconcile this. Yeah. And then I have to conclude, but yes. Okay. I was watching your thing about bios and people putting their biographies. Yeah. And you said, I want to be, how did you phrase it? It's not how I want to be recognized? Yes. You want to be recognized for yourself and not for your work? The thing that I said was too many people confuse their ideas. identity with their job or their accomplishments. And you can easily see it when you read someone's bio,
Starting point is 01:01:38 when it says CEO of or Oscar-winning actor, blah, blah, blah. And they're telling you a position they hold or an accomplishment they had 20 years ago. The problem is those people suffer from identity crises. Like without the job, without the responsibility, they literally have an identity crisis. And so I'm fine with accomplishment and I'm fine with ranks and position,
Starting point is 01:02:01 but that's not your identity. And so when I write my bios, I put who I am, then what I've done, optimist and author of. So I want to know, because no matter what I don't do, I'll always be that. That's wonderful. What advice do you give people who are told don't give up on your day job? Don't. Don't hold on to it as long as you can because that's going to be what makes you interesting. You think being a musician or an actor is what makes you interesting.
Starting point is 01:02:27 No, the part of you people want to hear about is those salad days and when you struggled. So I would say you are building who you are as a person through that struggle. And money is a real thing and you need to have a way to pay your bills because if you become financially desperate, your art will be compromised instantly. Yeah. Any life hacks that you have that help you be more efficient, more productive, personally, professionally, anything that you, any tricks that you've learned along the way that are now? Yes. Biggest one for me is I subscribe to Gabor Mates. kind of musings about ADHD, that it's a lack of ability to validate yourself, not a lack of
Starting point is 01:03:08 focus. So one thing that really helps me every day is when I sit down, I have a to-do list, and I write a list of all the things I'm doing well. And they don't just have to be work anything. Am I recycling? Am I exercising? Am I stretching every day? Am I creative? What all of it? Nothing backhanded. Well, at least I'm not doing a bad. No, no, no. I'm doing well at you're doing great is the name of the document. You're doing great. Is the name of the document. Write all those things out, then start writing my to-do list. And not only will you enter that task with momentum of feeling good about yourself, the thing you're always driving towards is that validation. You'll already have that and you work better when you like yourself. Everyone thinks they work
Starting point is 01:03:48 better when they hate themselves. No, when you like yourselves, when it feels fun and you feel good about yourself, you do your best work. You also then start to get that Pavlovian rush that when I sit to open my computer, I'm already feeling good because I know it's coming. And then I don't dread starting my day. I look forward to it. That's been a huge hack for me. Genius. Thank you. I've sold it for many people. I'm going to start that one. Matthew, I could talk to you forever. What an absolute joy to meet you. This is great. It was super fun. And it, like I said, kind of a personal throw because I've gotten to know you so well from your videos. It's really, really fun to sit across from you. I know your voice so well. Yeah. Thank you.
Starting point is 01:04:28 so much for coming and such a joy. Thank you. So much fun. A bit of optimism is a production of the Optimism Company. Lovingly produced by our team, Lindsay Garbenius, Phoebe Bradford, and Devin Johnson. Subscribe wherever you enjoy listening to podcasts, and if you want even more cool stuff, visit simonc.com. Thanks for listening. Take care of yourself. Take care of each other.

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