A Hot Dog Is a Sandwich - Beverages Do Not Exist

Episode Date: June 16, 2021

There's no such thing as a beverage. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This, this, this, this is Mythical. Don't have enough Josh in your life? Well, you can hear yours truly in episode 4 of Ronstadt, a scripted podcast from Q-Code, Wood Elf, and Mythical right now. I don't want to give too much away, but I'm really good. Please check out Ronstadt on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and wherever else you get your podcasts. And make sure to follow so you don't miss an episode. And also let me know when you spot me.

There's no such thing as a beverage. That's it. That's the intro. This is A Hot Dog is a Sandwich. Ketchup is a smoothie. Yeah, I put ice in my cereal, so what? That makes no sense. A hot dog is a sandwich. A hot dog is a sandwich. What? Welcome to our podcast, A Hot Dog is a Sand. A hot dog is a sandwich. What? Welcome to our podcast, A Hot Dog is a Sandwich, the show where we break down the world's biggest food debates. I'm your host, Josh Ayer. And I'm your host... Sorry! And I'm your host...

Hold on. And I'm your host, Nicole Handizadeh. I had a frog in my throat, I'm sorry. Auspicious start to the podcast. Nicole forgot her own name. Let me just eat my water. Nicole, I'm glad you brought that up. It's been a while. What? It's been a while. It's been a while since we've had just a completely insane kind of, you know, Josh rant about a subject that no one

cares about. And I thought we'd bring it back. Okay. I thought we'd bring it back. We did. There's no such thing as a soup, which is something I stand by. And people have called me out on that because I've posted pictures of myself making a soup and people have been like, oh, Josh, I thought soups didn't exist. And I'm like, look, I'm trying to communicate what the wet food is that I'm putting in my body and I understand that all you sheeple out there

you believe. That's a portmanteau of sheep and people. Yes, yes. Sheeple, they're sheep people because they follow. Why don't we say peep instead of sheeple? Why don't we say uh peep what do you mean sheeple why don't we say instead of it oh like a people sheep a peep because peeps i believe are copyrighted by uh whatever corporation makes peeps instead of wake up sheeple wake up because then you sound like a substitute teacher trying to sound cool in front of like an eighth

grade class you know i'm, what up peeps? Mr. Jones, you can call me Jerry. That's the name of the Cowboys owner. Anyways, what I'm saying is, Nicole, I don't believe beverages exist. I don't think there are any meaningful distinctions between drinks and food. I think the category of food and drink is completely meaningless. Everything is merely consumables. Okay. I disagree. Why? Okay. Because, okay, whenever you go, okay, this is a great example. Go ahead. When you are hosting a party, okay, and you're renting a space and they provide you food and drink, the food has a set price. The drink does not. But you're specifically talking about alcohol right well yeah that's a big kind of drink okay no no but alcohol is typically found in drink form that is true yeah alcohol can also

be found in non-drink form alcohol is a drug yeah oh my god you know about palco of course i know i know about so many things speaking of portmanteau's palco hall is short for powdered alcohol and it was legal for all of like a minute. Yeah, I remember. There were like videos of people consuming. Oh, what are they doing to palcohol? What are they doing? Are they drinking palcohol?

They can't. It's a powder. They were consuming it. They were consuming. That's what I'm saying. Everything's consumable. So palcohol is powdered alcohol that you... What was their market for it?

I remember reading their sort of internal marketing documents. Do you not like the taste of alcohol? Here's Palkahol. So the way that they tried to market it was that they were like, oh, it's very portable for people to carry. So if you're going to like an outdoor concert, then you can bring your Palkahol and then get whatever beverage you want and just add a little bit of Palkahol.

So silly. It was like there was like they were marketing like emergency. It was a little like Gatorade powder you know packets that they have but then someone was like hey don't you think like a 15 year old is gonna get their hands on this consume a whole thing and die yeah yeah yeah they're like no this is for responsible adults and they're like don't you think teens are gonna put this in their nose like no that can never happen with alcohol i don't think it was legal it was legal long enough for it to happen i remember there were so many tie-ups for it interesting but what i'm saying is alcohol is mostly consumed in drink format but you have things like alcohol but

not only that like there are ways to eat alcohol you got your vodka soaked gummy bears okay you know i've let beef jerky sit in malt liquor eat that as a snack what have you done college was weird for me yeah it sounds like it uh but no did you reserve the liquid and then do like uh you know how they like make like beef fat washed whiskey yeah did you do beef jerky washed yeah we drank it because it wasn't why are you surprised by this i don't know i mean you never couldn't you never cease to amaze me Josh here you know the life

I used to live yeah but that's wild but I'm saying when you're saying food and drink like that giving a separate cost for the food and drink at say like a wedding

or something that means alcohol yeah that's what the surcharge is but they're not charging extra for like I mean they'll cranberry juice

ice tea cranberry juice they'll charge extra but it's not at that premium but I think there are too many things in that category that for instance instance, right, I often, when I eat breakfast, I typically consume the same thing.

It's some combination of Greek yogurt, fruit, and protein powder with 65 grams of protein at least in it. Some say that your body can only absorb 30 grams of protein per hour or something, and then the rest of it, it kind of just gums up your digestive tract. Given my experience, that seems to be true as well. However, I generally will either turn that into a smoothie, which many would consider a drink, or I will turn it into a yogurt bowl. Yes, I was going to ask you, do you drink yogurt?

Well, I mean, think about different yogurt drinks. Do you drink or eat yogurt? Do you drink or eat pudding? Because pudding is the, what's that thing that you mix with cornstarch and water? What? Not a slurry. What's that non-Newtonian fluid? The non-Newtonian fluid!

I don't know, you can't just yell non- Oh, like goop, gorp, grop, sloop, slink. Ooblack, ooblack. Gooble gobble. Pudding is the oobble It is Of the culinary world Okay okay Case in point Case in point

Case in point Danimals Danimals Danimals A portmanteau of Danin and animals It's just a portmanteau I like how they thought

People cared enough About the name Danin and yogurt To care that it was Called Danimals One time I wanted to make A Danimal banana And call it Bananimals. So they take, Danimals came out with drinkable yogurt.

Yes. A while ago for kids. It was in a little crush container. I remember. The crush. But like all they've done is they, I mean, to thin out yogurt enough to drink it, especially a thin yogurt that's not Greek or it's not strained. Bulgarian.

Yeah. Bulgarian mountain yogurt. Bulgarian mountain yogurt's drinkable yeah is that a drinker of food are animals drinkable crushable yogurts is that a drinker of food that's what i'm saying oh no there's no point in differentiating but i want to why because you put i don't know something in my mind is telling me that like this cup of water in front of my face right now is not food i would maybe argue that water no water is still a food uh water is still consumable i was gonna say i could maybe make a case that water is the only true drink so so so you think anything that enters your mouth hole and you swallow is considered consumable solely a consumable

which i think we could even colloquialize to say food i think water is a food not a beverage what is a beverage nothing is a beverage nothing is a beverage nothing's a beverage and nothing is a soup what nothing is a soup it's all just things you consume for nutrition it's all it's to create so what is the point of food right there i know a fair amount of people in athletic spaces who like don't care anything about food culture right they don't get joy out of food they're like food is strictly fuel for my body to accomplish a tacit need uh and they'll like you know put some mustard on white rice shout out to nick scarvell as pro shop owner and best friend because that's what he does

but no i i understand that relationship to food for certain people. However, the point of food throughout like all of history has been to have some sort of cultural connection to gamify life enough to being joyful. Right. Think about the consumption of hot peppers. It doesn't make any sense. It causes you physical pain. It is literally a defense mechanism from a plant to cause you pain to not want to consume it and we through evolutionary biology and also just you know development of culture and this idea that things should be fun and exciting we've been like no we're gonna lean into this pain and like turn this into a and almost a problem to be solved you know here's a plant that doesn't want us to eat it

but we're gonna figure out how to turn it into sambals, how to, you know, turn that into chili paste and all this stuff. So some, like the point of consuming anything has always been one, nutrition, but then two, rooting yourself to a shared culture with a group of people, you know, creating a sense of identity. And then three, just kind of joy. Evolutionarily, we grew to want to laugh, right? Someone, I don't have the receipts on this, but there's a cultural anthropologist who coined the term the problem-solving gene and said that laughter was actually originally sort of developed as a sort of like mechanism to get you to want to solve problems. Like you see a problem, you solve it, and you're like, aha, look at that thing. I did it.

And so that is the point of food to me throughout like all of cultural and human history. And so I don't think we ever need to develop, you know, any sort of differentiation between beverage and food. I think that's just completely false. It is all things that we have developed over thousands of years to put in our mouths for joy, for culture, for comfort, and for nutrition. Case in point, yogurt. Think about Duh. I was just about to say Duh. Duh. I mean, what is Duh? Is Duh a drink or a food? It's a drink. Duh is a fermented yogurt drink with sparkling water, sometimes has mint in it, by the way. I love when there's dried mint. Duh. I literally had an argument with like five people. I'm like, Dürr sucks.

Like, Dürr is the best. I'm like, Dürr is garbage. It's really good. I mean, it's kind of like a yogurt-y, got a little bit of like a cheesy kefir flavored. It has a very specific taste. Some people love it. Some people hate it. I don't really care for it personally.

I think maybe an argument for that drinks do exist is that they are complementary to food in the sense that like you you drink a cola with a burger and they're almost meant to offset each other yeah like a milkshake and a burger is a milkshake of food well no i mean of course i mean think well what about a frosty frosty okay so think about this cream food. But then at what point does ice cream melt enough to become a drinkable drink? That's a great question. Right? Does it exist in the state of food at one moment and then the next after it melts? Because a milkshake you would consider a drink, right?

You go to In-N-Out, you're sipping it through a straw. Uh-huh. But then what percent of difference in morphology is there between an In-N-Out milkshake and Wendy's Frostyy which does not come with a straw nicola comes with a spoon it does yeah no i've only had one frosty before my life you only had one frosty yeah you gave it to me and i ate like 45 yeah what do you mean i don't do fun things like you frosties yeah i mean well is eating something with a spoon make it no longer a liquid well no no we're not talking about liquid. We're talking about drink. Oh, well, you can spoon coffee into your mouth.

You can, but like people don't. Yeah, you do. Who's spooning coffee? You spoon coffee? Okay, well, I'm mixing up my coffee and I take a spoon and I... That's a taster spoon. That's different. No, it's not.

That's a taste... It still performs the function. It still is performing the function of slurping. No, that is preliminarily tasting it to then make sure that it's primed for you to actually drink. Does it matter? Have you ever consumed a whole cup of coffee with a spoon? Of course not. Of course not.

You taste it with a spoon, right? Just to kind of get the taste and then you drink it out of the cup. So if I switch my utensil for how I'm consuming something, that changes it? It certainly changes what the intent was behind the thing, whether to drink or to eat. One drinks with a straw, one eats with a spoon. But it's meaningless. So with a stew, I eat all of the solid parts first of the stew with a spoon.

And then I use my mouth to tip the bowl to drink up the rest of the liquid. You're telling me that's a beverage now? I'm asking you! No, beverages don't exist and soups don't exist it's all just food that you put in your it's all consumables that you put in your body for nutrition for comfort for culture for joy so you mean to tell me that soda is in the same bracket as a hamburger correct and what soda is in the same because they're both giving you nutrition and comfort and joy and culture. But they're not. But they are. How are they?

Because, I mean, literally, even think about diet soda. The reason I said that water. I hate diet soda. Oh, God, I love it. I hate that test. Give me that diet, Dr. DP. I hate it. But either way, you're putting some sort of like minerals in your body at the very least. So even water, right?

Water doesn't have any nutritional values. Typically, zeroes across the board. However, you know, some may have a little bit of sodium in it. But water is generally giving you some sort of mineral content, right? Your body, not only does it need the macronutrients, right? The protein, the carbs, the fat, it also needs, you know, all the micronutrients and the vitamins and the minerals, and you are getting that from water. So everything you are just consuming is just something to keep you alive in some way, right? Yeah.

And so it's all the same. It's not the same. I can't wrap my head around these being the same thing. They're in two different categories for me. Think about the nutritional content between a very thin soup, like say even a broth. Okay. Right?

So if you look at, I wish we had, oh, yeah, I have a Diet Red Bull can right here. All right, so the only thing we have in this Diet Red Bull can is zeros across the board, except for 105 milligrams of sodium. Mm-hmm. Right? So essentially, I mean, this isn't even filled with sugar, right?

This is just literally a salty liquid. Yes. Right? What separates that? This is a guarana-flavored salty liquid. What separates this from a thin vegetable broth? And this has minerals and vitamins in it, too. Coffee?

I mean, you can have a naturally caffeinated soup. Where? I don't know. You put like ginseng, ginseng soup. So yeah, ginseng is a natural form of caffeine. You often put ginseng in a Korean chicken soup. Okay. What is the difference between those two things?

So I'm saying there's a world in which there is no nutritional difference between a thin ginseng laden korean chicken broth and a can of diet red bull so then what makes one a drink and one a food the way that it's presented but if you put that ginseng chicken broth inside of but i'm saying the intent doesn't matter i consume as my needs you can have bone broth in a bowl or you can have bone broth in a in a cup doesn't matter so is what but is one a beverage and is one of food no they're the same they're the same they're indistinguishable that's all i'm

saying here that's all i'm saying my brain there's no difference but and i think right now nicole we're in a changing world environment i hate this we're in a changing world environment people's needs are changing and the the way that people sell to those needs are changing because like who before would have even talked about putting bone broth in a cup until creation with a k juicery or whatever have you been to a creation of the k of course that place is weird owned by a persian lady oh really yeah they boss i drank something there and it was like really delicious it cost me like 12 bucks very expensive very delicious i did like a kickboxing class in brentwood a while ago.

Yeah. And then went to creation immediately afterwards. Nice. And I just really wanted to be on brand. There's actually a really good bone broth place. Oh, Bel Campo. Bel Campo makes a great bone broth.

Bel Campo makes the best bone broth. $11 for eight ounces. I don't even care. I will pay that much because it makes me feel so good. And you're, and you're drinking it, right? You are probably like walking around with,

you're walking around like the third street Promenade, drinking your bone broth. You're like, oh my God, my skin is going to glow because of all the collagen here. And did you know it's protein? That's not why I drink it. It just tastes really good. But you're drinking a soup. Our food culture has changed so much to the point where it's normal to put soup in a coffee cup. I like that world.

I'm not saying I dislike it. I think it's interesting. Also, you know who was doing that for years before any health food store started doing it? NFL teams. Nice. So if you, you know, normally they have the Gatorade coolers and everything.

Chicken broth in there. Dude, they did. Oh, no, wait, when it's cold outside? When it's super cold outside, they'll have like cocoa, they'll have coffee, and they would have freaking chicken broth in heated things. You'd see players just like drinking one of the little plastic gatorade cups full of chicken broth shuddering on the sideline in green bay in the frozen tundra yeah that's

really similar to me walking on thirsty promenade with my super similar don't have enough josh in your life well you can hear yours truly in episode four of Ronstadt, a scripted podcast from Q-Code, Wood Elf, and Mythical right now. I don't want to give too much away, but I'm really good. Please check out Ronstadt on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and wherever else you get your podcasts. And make sure to follow so you don't miss an episode. And also let me know when you spot me.

But no, all these health food places are the ones that got me kind of thinking about this question because this stuff keeps me up at night. Like this is what I think about when I lay my head down, right? It's like 1115 and I'm like, oh my God, I'm so tired. I need to go to bed. And then you lay in bed and you're just like, beverages don't exist. And then for the next two hours, you're just like beverages don't exist and then for the next two hours you're just kind of resting around but josh what about mastication what about we can't talk about mastication what about peristalsis what about peristalsis what

do you mean it just drinks just go into your body you don't have to do anything actually there is something to that there's tell them about the process of mastication and peristalsis. Okay, so I have a list. Mastication is the art or process of chewing, the act of processing or grinding, shredding, crushing, or kneading to a pulp. Mastication is step one of the digested process. I don't want to read this. Yeah, basically, it's just the move of your mouth, masticating, chewing things into a pulp so your body can consume it.

It goes down the esophagus. And then peristalsis happens, which is the progressive wave of contraction and relaxation in a tubular muscle system, especially the alimentary canal. Alimentary canal? Alimentary canal? Is that good? English is my first language. Is it C-A-N-A-L? Canal.

Canal. The word is canal. It's canal. What are youA-L? Canal. Canal. The word is canal. It's canal. What are you talking about? Elementary canal. Elementary canal. This is sanal. Sanal.

Okay. Elementary canal by which the contents are forced through the system. What about that, Josh? This is actually important. And it's important evolutionarily as well. What about chyme? You know about chyme? What is chyme? That's what the foodarily as well. What about chyme? You know about chyme? What is chyme?

That's what the food is churned into. Chyme? Can you read? Do you think I went to medical school? I don't know. Why do you expect me to be in the elementary kennel probably? I can barely speak English on a good day. Okay, so no, like chewing and swallowing is what you're talking about.

Peristalsis is when you swallow food and there's a muscular movement that moves it down your esophagus and that's something we obviously developed you know over time there's a reason that humans aren't exclusively drinking liquid diet yeah and uh there's a reason weird tech bros think that you can just drink soylent and get all the nutrition satisfaction you need which to me completely cuts out the fact that humans have used food as entertainment for thousands upon thousands of years i read this guy what i love doing most in this world is picking on student journalists just trying their best no i don't i i work for a college newspaper and i had nothing but a poor view of it um but anyway someone uh wrote they kind of wrote like a weird takedown piece on babish um and it was all about how like these days and you know they're started with

the phrase these days so you're like oh this is automatically garbage like these days food is about entertainment whereas food used to be about this like food has always been about entertainment every royal court has had chefs creating stupid pastries. I mean, we have, we would not need special holiday dishes, right? There's, I mean, holiday dishes dating back thousands upon thousands of years. We wouldn't have those if food was all about sustenance and whatever. It's always been about fun and entertainment throughout history. Yeah. Did they talk about how there's like food waste and entertainment and stuff?

Yeah, which is, Jesus, on the level, like, of course we waste food when we cook a show. What about whatever they're like? Oh, like because of, you know, the what is it called? The environment and stuff like people shouldn't do it for entertainment and stuff. Talk about that. Yeah. No, I understand what they're saying. To me it's insane because the amount of food waste that comes from the entire entertainment industry does not equal the amount of food waste that comes from the wind buffet, the grocery store. 40% of all food in American homes is thrown away. Totally. Creating stuff for content like that is not, I understand how it could be triggering to see it on camera occasionally, you know, but the fact is that is doing nothing in the grand scheme of things it's it's corporate and it's industrial but anyways what i was talking about is that the process of chewing and swallowing there if you consume 200 calories worth of of consumptibles as i'm calling them now via drinking so like not chewing not masticating not starting that

digestive process you will be hungrier than 200 calories of something that you've chewed uh this is something that's been studied by by dieticians and stuff like that um because there is something and there's no energy of your mouth chewing no there's almost no biological reason for it there's almost no scientific reason for why you should feel that way is it the way that we're absorbed through absorption i mean it could be it could be that that um god well there's something called the pyloric valve yeah it's probably the the absorption of liquid is faster instead of solids maybe i don't know but i think what a lot of it is is uh psychosomatic in the sense that we enjoy chewing and swallowing things right it's something that feels biting into something is more satisfying if you're

hungry yeah right and then we got to get into the fact that hunger and thirst are two different sensations totally two oh my god yes but that said you can quench your thirst for the food you can quench your thirst yeah i've done that before and i hate it you ever like are you ever like really thirsty and just like let me just have this instead let me just eat a whole cucumber which is just water which is just water cucumbers watermelons like 93 water watermelons a beverage watermelons beverage it is but no i i am fascinated by by that fact that biologically you shouldn't feel any difference but just the process that you want to bite into something how many times have you said the phrase like i'm hungry and then you realize it's not anything to do with your stomach being empty it's just you want to eat something right we confuse the

two things because eating is fun it's entertainment yes it is yeah but i mean so is you know drinking consuming anything these two things we're not solely doing it on our biological needs we're also doing it just you know to make life worth living and to provide color and context so all these things we're just consuming for life for culture for entertainment and for sustenance at the end of the day there is absolutely no difference cool but no what actually got me thinking about a lot of this is the modern for entertainment and for sustenance at the end of the day, there is absolutely no difference. Cool. But no, what actually got me thinking about a lot of this is the modern health food movement. Because at some point, Nicole, Nicole, at some point, smoothies, they split. You ever see like an evolutionary diagram of like a hamster or something?

I've seen evolutionary diagrams. Yes. Maybe not of a hamster, but yeah. There'll be like two creatures it'll be like here was a coelacanth or whatever and then it'll split and it's like and then half the lizard part of that turned into an alligator and then somehow the other half dinosaurs or chickens or chickens or dinosaurs yeah but like some ended up alligators and some ended up ostriches yeah you know that happened uh at some point in the last 10 years with smoothies okay is smoothie a beverage or food well this is what i'm getting at what is it smoothies have polarized now

where smoothies are dead we've talked about this before smoothies are pretty much dead right the the swinging 90s of the jamba juice and the robex yeah the the smoothies we knew from the past but now we have rebranded they have they they have split like the coelacanth did into an ostrich and an alligator i don't even know what a coelacanth did into an ostrich and an alligator i don't even know what a coelacanth is i have no idea but anyways what i'm saying is smoothies have now split into either juices or bowls you know what i mean i hate smoothie bowls i hate smoothie but what the hell is a smoothie bowl it's sherbet it's sherbet it's sherbet in a bowl but a smoothie bowl is a food whereas a smoothie smoothie is a drink. In what people would say.

In what the masses would say. Yeah, but the texture is a little bit different, don't you think? It is. And then it's almost like the resultant runoff liquid ended up in the juice bar where they're serving liquid juices. So it's like our tastes have changed to want simultaneously more solid food and then more liquidy drinks. It's putting solid food on top of the semi-solid foods. Yeah, you're talking about the toppings on an acai bowl yes that's exactly what i'm talking about also the crazy thing about acai is acai only grows

in i believe one region in brazil and acai is incredibly difficult near impossible to transport fresh and so that's why everything we get with acai in it is incredibly sweet because you know it's incredibly sweet and sour because it's preserved and also frozen and shipped so even in like the largest brazilian cities they're eating like quote-unquote inauthentic you know acai because it's really only one regional thing but i think it's fascinating how that's like taken over la i don't care for acai bowls would you do you like sorry burps it's okay but do you like any smoothie bowls like Like, are you into that movement? I don't like smoothies. I love juices though. Weird. What is it about?

So is it because you're treating juices as a drink and smoothie as a food? No, I treat juices as a food too. You do? Yeah, like morning juices. Like that'll be your breakfast. Yeah. Just a morning juice. Yeah.

Interesting. Yeah. And then, I don't know. I think smoothies make my throat hurt. Just the cold? Yeah, the cold't know, I think smoothies make my throat hurt. Just the cold? Yeah, the cold makes me, I like cough a lot. Like, I have an issue where like when I laugh a lot on the podcast, I'm like coughing for like 15 minutes afterwards, like really hard. I think it's just my vocal cords are just very sensy.

You should eat a tea. No, you should eat a tea. What about those, what about those cubes of coffee? Those biohackers, you know, with the cubes of coffee? What? What are the biohack about those cubes of coffee those biohackers you know what what are the biohackers with cubes you've never seen the coffee cubes that the biohackers made google it is your laptop working it's alive miraculously your laptop is alive yeah this is like the hanukkah miracle of laptops right now coffee cubes founded in burbank founded in burbank

wait no no what's the coffee just tell me about, oh, is it a chewable coffee? It's a chewable coffee. So what happens when you take something that's known as a liquid and then you solidify it and then it turns into a beverage in your mouth? What do you do with it? Vodka-soaked gummy bears. What do you do with them? They taste like poison.

You think you know what a vodka-soaked gummy bear? Maggie's nodding along. You think you're like, oh, vodka, You know, I've had alcohol flavored desserts. Gummy bears are really nice. But then you chew it and then you're just chewing and squirting little lemon scented vodka directly at your tonsils

and you want to throw up. I love it. Oh my God. You eat vodka soaked gummy bears? Have you ever had the chocolates that have a shot of alcohol in them? Yes, those are good. Oh my God.

Those are good. Don't drink it. Speaking of edible alcohol, do you partake in edible, not alcohol, but like Jell-O shots, right? Who doesn't? Do you enjoy Jell-O shots? What is Jell-O?

Jell-O is you take a beverage and then you add a little bit of dead animal bones to it and it becomes a food. See how stupid all this sounds, you idiots? I guess what happened is it's all food. It's all food. And I hate that it's all food. There's no such thing as a drink. It's all food. The only drink is water. I will concede to the fact that the only drink is water only because

I do not drink water so I have never consumed a beverage. Do you remember yesterday I grabbed a plain water bottle and everyone was like worried. And then someone took it from you. Someone took it. They were like, oh, I assumed this wasn't yours because it was the water all right nicole we've heard what you and i have to say now it's time to find out what other wacky ideas are rattling out there in the twitterverse it's time for a segment we call opinions are like casserole

for a segment we call Opinions Are Like Casserole. All right, first up, we got at Bencelolife, Alfredo Pasta Tastes Better Microwaved. I know what they're getting at. What are they? I don't know what this means. I know.

I think they're talking about leftover Alfredo Pasta that is microwaved, tasting better. Well, yeah, because some foods taste better the next day some do but some it i wouldn't say better or worse it changes it right because the alfredo sauce at that point is completely absorbed by the noodles yeah it's thickened so like this person

probably doesn't like a very saucy pasta they like the concentrated flavor but have you ever uh reheated leftover mac and cheese and it seems like the flavor just left? Sometimes. It's like that cheesy, that like cheddar-y funk is gone. The cheddar-y funk is gone. And I don't know what happens. It gets like absorbed by the noodles like an odor eater. And then vaporizes like a burning candle.

Yeah. Yeah. Wow. I totally get it. It's not my thing. I like a good saucy nude. I like both. There's a time and place for both types of nudes in my opinion. All rightion schultz 21 says dip your cookies in applesauce so good uh what kind of cookies like

a snickerdoodle dipped in applesauce sounds really good but like a double chocolate chunk chocolate chocolate cookie no i want to do that i think we need to reinvent the applesauce game yeah applesauce isn't sexy it's not sexy but it could be george let's make sexy let's make sexy and we'll call it sexy applesauce no no no we'll call it hustlers sex sauce made with apples it's like how people tried to rebrand you my playboy dude playboy lily flint getting on our sexy applesauce business sauceustler sauce Sauce made from apples Well like people Tried to rebrand yogurt Like for men You know There's like

There's some brand I don't think it's called brogurt I think it's a word That I made up Or overnight oats There's one just called Like mush It has very like

Masculine branding on it Is it? Yeah I don't feel like it's masculine I think it's actually Quite gender neutral branding But that's just my opinion Fair enough

Fair enough But I'm saying that There's a way to rebrand certain foods into being sexful. And I think we need to make a sexful applesauce. Because right now it's plain. You got Mott's out there. No sex appeal to Mott's. Zero.

Tree top. What's tree top? Because none of my juice is flowing. No. Uh-uh. No. We need sexy applesauce. And I think we can make it.

The sexiest yogurt of all time is Activia. No. There's a sexy French yogurt out there not not nusa we we we yeah when i said sexy french yogurt you immediately knew what i was talking about yeah but also there's siggy's you ever had siggy's siggy's isn't sexy siggy's is like the responsible girl sexy yeah yeah it's like visco girl yeah it's like okay or like like uh like i read kinfolk magazine sexy you know it's like i'm practical i'm the one you're probably gonna want to spend the rest of your life with but then we we is the yogurt that you're like i don't care what happens as long as we have tonight baby it's because it's in the glass bottle and has a really pretty top oh my god so funny okay i don't know this is weird what's gogurt oh gogurt's not gogurt is uh

no gogurt's loose and lascivious i love gogurt will just be inside anyone as fast as possible as fast as you can slurp what where are we at lisa lisa mig ketchup with mexican tamales is better than salsa i like ketchup on a lot of things yeah i to me the sweetness would overtake the mental kind of tamale yeah you know true that's very true you know but uh i'm thinking with like you know uh anything that has a saucy meat inside of it the ketchup to me is going to ruin that taste yeah true uh i've had ketchup with my mexican tamale specifically turkey and it's really good it's really good i like it i put ketchup on a lot of things yeah travis creas says

bologna and peanut butter is amazing we tested that we tested various meats well we tested hot dog with peanut butter and we tested salami with peanut butter and both were pretty bad pretty bad pretty bad right yeah i think we need in the same way bad, right? Yeah. I think we need, in the same way that we're making sexy applesauce, we need more diverse peanut-based condiments. Okay, cool. Because I think that's what people want. Yeah, but like they don't.

I think about the- You think they do, but and then you create it and then you pitch it to the grocery stores and then no one buys it. No one buys it. That's how most things happen. It's like savory popsicles. It's like, fun idea, no one buys it.

No, this is, people, no, Josh, you think people want these things, but they don't. They say they do, but then it's in front of their faces, and they say, hey, what the hell is that? And then they never buy it, and they're also in England for some reason. Pitch it in Wigan? They're also in England for some reason. You're in Norwich?

Where are you at? You're at Cardiff by the Sea? Huh? I'm at the White, what is it called? White Cliffs of Dover? Oh, yeah, you're at the White Cliffs of Do'm not the white, what is it called? White Cliffs of Dover? Oh, yeah, the White Cliffs of Dover at Glastonbury? Where are you at, Nicole? Where's this fictional grocery store?

But no, the way they use, like, think about tahini, right? Tahini, you put straight up tahini on a pita, on sandwich, on sabich. I don't like it. It's going to be garbage. Yeah. But that's why you take tahini and you mix it with the water, the lemon, the garlic, the salt, and then you get a beautiful condiment. That's what people need with peanut butter.

Peanut butter is tahini. It's a base ingredient. Yes. You need to mix it with stuff. Yes. God dang it. All right. I'm a cake ninja.

Good for you. When I was a kid, I would only eat salad with strawberry jam. I thought dressings were gross. This is fascinating to me because there are a lot of salad dressings out there that are pretty damn close to jam. That are pretty much jam. You get

some of those bottled raspberry vinaigrettes, especially the fat-free raspberry vinaigrette, where they're just spiking it with corn syrup to make you feel something. That's pretty much a jam. Yeah. This doesn't sound totally unreasonable to me. Not at all. Literally, you mix equal parts jam and balsamic, and that's a pretty solid vinaigrette right there. I mean, vinaigrette using that term very loosely. Emulsification. Yeah, no, this sounds pretty good.

Some dressings are kind of gross, if you really think about what they are. Yeah, dressing in general is just a gross idea. It's a gross idea, yeah. But I like it. You have foods, you'd like to make them wetter. Here's a wet to food your foods. Yeah, I mean, it's like a gross thing, but in life, you need some gross idea. But I like it. You have foods. You'd like to make them wetter. Here's a wet to food your foods. Yeah.

I mean, like, I don't mind. It's like a gross thing. But in life, you need some gross things. Yeah. I mean, I dip all my pizza in salad dressing. Not even ranch. I'll dip pizza in honey mustard. I don't care. Well, that sounds good.

Jax Grayson 005 says, I like to dip Dunkin' Donuts hash browns in the chocolate on top of the Boston cream donut. Okay. Do you, boo? You ever have spud nuts? No, but I've always wanted to try spud nuts. I've wanted to try potato-based desserts for a long time. I also one time saw

that there's truffles made out of potato, and I really want to try those too. I'm really sad about it, and there's no potato places around here for me to try my desserts. Aw, Nicole don't got no spud nuts. Spud nuts is a potato-based donut shop. That sounds perfect for this person. Yeah, that sounds like what he wants to know.

You like potatoes? You like the flavor of donuts? Go to spud nuts. That's right. Are they even still around? I haven't been to a spud nuts in years. What is a spud? They were like perfectly fine.

It kind of just tastes like a donut. With like a little bit more kind of like chew and starchiness. Spud nuts near me? Oh, yeah. There's multiples. We're taking a field trip to spud nuts. Really? Yeah, let's do it right now.

Maggie, we're going to spud nuts. Maggie, cut the podcast. We're taking a field trip to Spud Nuts. Really? Yeah, let's do it right now. Maggie, we're going to Spud Nuts. Maggie, cut the podcast. We're going to Spud Nuts. At AJ's Coffee Adventures, nachos should be layered. I don't care what Josh says about it. He's wrong. AJ, you want layers. Eat a lasagna, fella.

Go get a layer cake. Get yourself a meal foie. Get yourself a meal crepe. Don't layer your nachos. Nachos should be one layer. If you want more food, eat two layer your nachos nachos should be one layer if you want more food eat two plates of nachos i made a claim that nacho when i watch people build nachos they'll lay down chips then they'll put cheese and toppings and then more chips and then more cheese and toppings i'm

ethically against that oh interesting is that how you build your nachos it's a it's a preference thing like depends on the day i'm not like married to i don't eat too many nacho plates so i'm like not that like particular about how it's assembled unfortunately i think that people i mean people will often get down into the distribution thing they'll just say like you know i don't want a layer of chips on the bottom that don't have the toppings but for me that's the sort of fun build your own adventure of nachos you get that plain chip and you're like this is an opportunity chip this isn't a plain chip this is an opportunity for me to swipe through the rest of this plate to find the perfect bites of things that i want on these nachos i think layering it you're creating steam you're creating

wetness you're creating a nacho lasagna but that's enjoyable don't you think if it's enjoyable we need to make a nacho lasagna that's not nachos that's not oh yeah we need to make it yeah we'll make it we'll make it on mythical kitchen uh can i ask you a's not nachos that's not oh yeah we need to make it yeah we'll make it we'll make it on mythical kitchen uh can i ask you a question about nachos please do you put regular cheese or do you put like cheese sauce um i i used to be a very hardo on cheese sauce exclusively but recently i've softened on that i think if you do cheese sauce the problem with that is i also love really soupy liquidy beans on nachos yeah youos. Yeah, you can't have both of them. You can't have both.

It'll just be a gross disaster. Essentially, I loaded up with salsa and various cremas. And, like, I made a nacho plate once with cheese sauce and soupy beans. And I think I even had, like, a braised meat. And I was like, this is soup. Yeah, it was too much. This is soup with chip croutons. Yeah, yeah.

And so now I've learned if I want soupy or other ingredients, I'll use, like, you know, like a Monterey Jack is just my favorite because you get such a nice texture on it and meltiness. There's another style of nacho though that I think a lot of people attribute to Texas and there's a lot of hardos in Texas who believe that nachos should be individually built on each chip. Interesting. Yeah. So like everything is composed. It does sound like an effort.

I don't care. Also to me, that's a tostaritas. Totally. I agree with you. It's like a little tostada. Yeah. Yeah does sound like an effort. I don't care. Also, to me, that's tostaritas. Totally. I agree with you. It's like a little tostada, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. Questionable Downhiller says,

I think it's sacrilegious, but cheddar cheese on spicy ramen is good. Okay. I think this is a, I love putting cheese in my ramen, but it has to be American. The cheddar doesn't melt that well. Well, I mean, but think about,

when they said this, I was thinking about French onion soup. How you get that little gratin on top of that cheese. Oh, that's interesting. If this person's doing the gratin of cheddar cheese on top. Oh, interesting. See, I was thinking that it's just they're slapping down a slice and letting it go. They might be. They might be. I'm giving them the benefit of the doubt

that they're doing a gratin, but I don't know how you'd broil your ramen that would melt the styrofoam. Yeah, maybe they're not doing that, though. Maybe they're not. Cheddar mixing in with a thin broth is tough because she's gonna separate into proteins yeah and all that american cheese gives you that that creaminess pop a little bit of cream cheese in there a little bit of pickled jalapenos make like some jalapeno popper ramen oh dude bacon pickled jalapenos cream cheese a little bit of broth we got you out of the show we got you this is just show. We got you.

This is just a- Maggie, write this down. This is just a brainstorming session. Give us more good opinions. Thanks. There we go. Unpopular opinion from Dan Worley 1030. Fettuccine Alfredo and chicken is the adult version of mac and cheese with nuggets. Hmm.

Oh. In terms of basicness, yeah. In terms of basicness, yeah. That's one of those things that the foodarati, right? The elite food people in their ivory towers. Foodarati, like Illuminati. Good one, Josh. Hardy har har.

Not Illuminati. Actually, literati is the reference. Like the hyper literate smart people of society. That's okay, Nicole. What? What I'm saying is like intense foodies,-poo fettuccine Alfredo. It's like it's not authentically Italian. It's like who gives rats A-double hockey sticks?

Also, it was invented in Rome and it's a delicious dish. So I guess it is true that fettuccine Alfredo chicken is an adult version of mac and cheese nuggets, especially you put a little bit of broccoli on there. I think it's delicious too. I love it. Who could not love it? But I do agree with this opinion that it is the adult version mac and cheese nuggets, especially you put a little bit of broccoli on there. I think it's delicious too. I love it. Who could not love it? But I do agree with this opinion that it is the adult version.

It is. It's like more acceptable for you to eat. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Okay. Art Fexigila says, Mythical Kitchen staff should be able to hug Josh at least once a year.

Great opinion. Love it. Will you sacrifice your Christmas bonus Absolutely not. to hug me? Absolutely not. Because it's a substitute good.

You have to choose. It is not. A hug is not equal to money. Well, fine. Then you don't get You mean to tell me that you want me to give you money

for me to hug you? Yes! Yes! That is a relationship. What does that even mean? Because you obviously are excited for the prospect. For people who don't know, maybe there's people who don't watch the YouTube show,

I often joke about, but I'm also pretty serious about the fact that I don't like to be touched, and I don't like hugging coworkers especially. And so that's where this is all coming from. So if my coworkers want to hug me, they got to give me their holiday bonus. Them's are the rules, Nicole. I don't make them, except I did. You just made it. Last one, last one.

At Liddy Casimiro, all peanut butter is gross, except for Laura's. Give me all the oil on top, please. No. Je refuse. What am I going to mix? Je non refuse I'm gonna mix my own peanut butter like a peasant

Nah they should do that in the factory for me Yes I got what was billed as a no stir peanut butter And there was a little layer of oil on top Threw the whole thing away Well that's just because it was separated I didn't actually I mixed it and then I put it in the fridge So it stopped separating but no I don't

Life's too short I got stuff to do I'm not mixing my own peanut butter I don't think all peanut butter is gross I got stuff to do. I'm not mixing my own peanut butter. I don't think all peanut butter is gross. I love creamy. I love chunky. I love this. I love that. But I love Laura's Scutters so much.

I'd argue that like all peanut butter is pretty damn good, except for the Whole Foods 365 unsalted crunchy. Oh, yeah. The unsalted is gross. But the honey, the honey roasted. That stuff's good. But I accidentally bought the wrong one one time. And I was just like, this is,

it tastes so like bacterial and like burnt peanut skins. And I was like, I'm out, I'm out. It's the first gross peanut butter I've had. One more, at Gilboard, bagels are a type of pasta. Josh, this was my opinion. Wrong, wrong.

This was my opinion. You overstepped. You're wrong. Drinks are food or whatever I said. And on that note, thank you for listening to A Hot Dog is a sandwich. If you want to hear more

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