A Hot Dog Is a Sandwich - What’s The Best PB&J Combo?

Episode Date: November 3, 2021

Today, we're talking about the best PB & J combos! To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This, this, this, this is Mythical. The average American child consumes 1,500 PB&J sandwiches before they turn 18. That number has roughly nothing to do with the podcast, I just really want to know whose job it is to track child sandwich consumption. Anyways, we're talking about the best PB&J combos, because this is A Hot Dog is a Sandwich. Ketchup is a smoothie. Yeah, I put ice in my cereal, so what? That makes no sense. A hot dog is a sandwich. A hot dog is a sandwich. Ketchup is a smoothie. Yeah, I put ice in my cereal, so what? That makes no sense. A hot dog is a sandwich.

A hot dog is a sandwich. What? Welcome to our podcast, A Hot Dog is a Sandwich, the show where we break down the world's biggest food debates. I'm your host, Josh Ayer. And I'm your host, Nicole Inaidi. And Nicole, today we're talking about tracking child sandwich consumption. Okay.

So when you, like, do you just put the tags on the kids' ears? Four. And then what do you,, do you just put the tags on the kids ears? Four. And then what do you, what? The answer is four. What? Four. You have four children

that you're tracking their sandwich consumption habits? Maybe. I do not want to get sued. Who are these kids? Where did you find these? Are they, do you know them?

You ask way too many questions. Hey, speaking of questions, Nicole, how do you feel about PB&Js? I love peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, except mine, I know it's going to be a little bit controversial. questions nicole how do you feel about pb and j's i love peanut butter sandwiches except um

mine i know it's going to be a little bit controversial controversial i already know people are going to be up in arms like what what are you talking about lady i saw you make it be you made a pb and j about half an hour in the kitchen for quote unquote research yeah and i hated what you did i had to get in the right frame of mind for the podcast you know how like people they do push-ups before they go, like before they lift. Oh, Josh, yeah. Yeah, no, that's me.

That's exactly what I do. You know how people do push-ups so they look really veiny on camera? Ahem, Josh here. Yeah, I have an old grease bucket that I do bicep curls with and then I do a couple different grip style of push-ups to activate different parts of my chest.

That's normal. So I just ate a PB&J and Josh got really offended when he saw that I folded a single bread in half to eat my sandwich. If you want to make half a PB&J, which is something I often want, just a little lanyap in between the day. That's a great word, lanyap. What does that mean? Yeah, I don't know.

It's like a Southern Creole word, I think. It just means like a little nosh. Okay. A lanyap. Anyways, you want a little lanyap in the middle of the day. And if you want a half a PB&J, I refuse to fold the bread over. And I will actually cut down the middle to create two separate halves of the bread. Because unlike a hot dog that has the bread hinge, I think when you have that in a PB&J, it messes up the ratios.

I don't agree with you at all about the messed up ratios. What do you mean the ratios? A PB&J has to be, to me, on two separate slices of bread. I've made plenty of PB&Js on hot dog buns. You know, I'll eat whatever. Same, yeah. But my ideal, it has to have the same equal ratio on every single bite. That's important to me.

That's like part of my comfort. PB&J is such a comfort food. I have so many weird little emotions. A PB&J should be boring. I don't want to be excited by my PB&J. I want to be comforted. I want the PB&J to hug me from the inside out the way my father never did. Anyways, Nicole, what is, we just weren't a touchy family.

It's cool. We showed love in our own ways. You said, sorry, let's get back to the topic at hand. You said your ideal PB&J combo because that's what we're talking about here. What's the bread? What's the nut butter? Okay. What's the jam?

Okay. Your ultimate, what are you going with? My ultimate number one most delicious peanut butter and jelly combo is Oro Wheat Whole Wheat Bread. Number one, which is already people are going to be up and they're like, why isn't it white bread? Because I grew up in a house that I had to be healthy in front of my mom. Yeah, we grew up in that era.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Number two. Low-fat cottage cheese or whole wheat bread from the Costco that was sold in two packs. True, true, true. Number two, the jam. Mine is Smucker's Raspberry Preserves with the seeds. Oh, oh, you like the, I get it. You don't like it boneless?

No. You get the raspberries with the bones in them? I need the crunch. I need to know I'm eating a real fruit. You know what I mean? No, disagree. The jelly, it's just fruit juice. It doesn't do it for me.

Again, it's that health. It's that weird health nod that I'm doing. I know what you mean. It's like getting the lemonade that has 3% real juice in it, and you're like, what is that going to do? But yeah, I feel that. My peanut butter, you know i've said it time and time again it's laura scutters the main girl laura scutter so that's my typical pb and j and

it is typically on one piece of bread that i fold over and then really controversial debbie actually taught me this shout out to debbie deb Debbie taught me that if you put the bread with the peanut butter on in the toaster oven, the top gets like crackly and then melty and then you put your jelly on it and it's phenomenal. Oh no, you're a toaster. No, no, no. I don't toast my bread.

I toast the peanut butter. And the bread is nice and soft, but the peanut butter gets nice and toasty. Yeah, the peanut butter sort of melts and it gets into the crevasses of the bread is nice and soft but the peanut butter gets nice and toasty yeah the peanut butter sort of melts and it gets into the crevasses of the bread it makes it so it creates this like skin almost like pudding okay and then melty in the middle and then you just put like a dollop of the jam and it's just delicious what kind of ratios you're working with peanut butter to jelly i don't know i know people people talk about that. I don't either. I never think about the ratios. It's intuitive. Yeah, it's however I'm feeling.

Like one day I want, you know, I want more peanut butter. One day I want like, you know, my bread to be a little bit flatter. So I kind of like squeeze it down. Like it just depends. Maybe it's the butt of the bread. Oh no, you throw that away. No. You throw away the butt of the bread. No, you save the butt of the bread for like croutons.

No, not even croutons. I'm saying for like the end of the week. I also have my like end of the week meal, which is typically like Sunday afternoon before I go shopping again, where it's like, let's clean everything out of the fridge. We're just going to throw it into a pot. We're going to do whatever. That's when the bread heels come out to play. Nice. From like, I got an old can of tuna and some vegetable scraps.

We're mashing that together. We're eating it with a bread heel. Yeah. But other than that, I will never make a PB&J on a bread heel. Okay. And this is my honorable mention. Grape jelly Uncrustable. Numerous dose. That is... Man, there's something about Uncrustables that I can't stand.

The peanut butter is so gummy and hard. I know. I didn't grow up on them because they were like too expensive. I am having a moment here. I love Uncrustables so much. Why? What is it about Uncrustables for you? They're so bad for you. What do you mean they're bad for you?

The bread is fake. I think they're generally bad for society. The bread is fake. The peanut butter is fake. The jelly is fake. But it's so... You want to talk about being hugged from the inside? That's an Uncrustable.

Being hugged from the inside isn't... I guess that's how I feel about a ham and cheese Hot Pocket. Or specifically, a breakfast lean pocket. Well, you know better than I know better that's pure comfort yeah for me yeah uncrusted okay so your ultimate pb and j you're going or wheat whole wheat raspberry smuckers preserves with the seeds and these preserves yeah and then the laura scatters peanut butter toasted just the peanut butter toasted so it melts into the crevasses i don't do that as much as i used to but like if i'm feeling like hella nostalgic that's what I'm doing, yeah. What I love about your PB&J,

it might be a bit controversial. A lot of people might go under bread. I don't really know, but I agree with you on the wheat bread, but I love that there's a common theme throughout your whole PB&J, which is a little illusion of health. Yes, 100%.

Thanks, mom. There's every single level of it because Laura Scudder's, that's the OG quote- quote unquote natural peanut butter. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That you get in stores when you got to stir for like three freaking minutes, which is why I avoid it like the plague. I still have it in my fridge. The jam with the seeds in because you're like, well, it's basically a fruit.

And the whole wheat bread, which has almost no, they've like done studies and found out that the whole wheat bread in stores and the white bread are pretty much, your body reacts to it almost completely identically. Don't tell Shala. There's a tiny bit more.'t tell shallow there's more don't tell me there's a little there's a little bit more fiber but i think it's uh there was harold mcgee did this study um he was the author of modernist bread okay where he basically found out that like the nutrients that you find in whole wheat especially in grocery store bread like your people's bodies just aren't deficient of them ever so it's kind of like pointless why we eat it. That said, I prefer the taste of it. Yeah.

It tastes more like bread. It tastes more bread than bread. It's breadier. Yeah, I think it's the whole, it's the way that it looks. Yeah. You know, the little nuts and seeds on the outside. I love the little nuts and seeds. I think they're just oats.

Yeah. Well, okay, so there's oats on that. So you want me to get into mine? Go for it. Okay. So many okay. So there's oats on that. So you want me to get into mine? Go for it. Of course. Okay. So many people took up many hobbies during quarantine. One of mine was trying to build the best PB&J I could.

Really? Because like I mentioned, it's very much a comfort food for me. When I'm feeling a little down, I'll just make a PB&J, you know, have a nice little glass of whole milk or almond milk with it or something. Even like one of the bites i'll dip in the milk just for you know just for laughs can i ask you a question yeah yeah do you drink milk out of the carton like a savage yeah of course me too yeah yeah i just have to double check okay continue and i was also like living alone during this and so oh i'd be like shirtless coming back

from workout slamming a whole milk wow oh yeah fun. I have an image of what that smells like. An image of what it smells like. Well, you know I don't have body odor. I have that gene where you don't have body odor. Lucky you. And your earwax is clear and crusty. Yeah, instead of wet and yellow, my earwax is just clear. I think my mom is the same way.

Really? She and I should hang out. Me and Shelly should do a workout and just not smell together. Like very little body hair. Yeah. Lucky you guys. It's nice. Save money on razors. Yeah. Yeah. Lucky you guys. It's nice. Save money on razors.

What I did, I got really into like buying all the best nut butters on the Instacart. And so I have found out my absolute ideal PB&J preparation. Nice. Starts off Dave's Killer Bread 21 grain. Oh my God. I know what you're saying. Josh, wouldn't you go Power Seed? No.

No. 21 grain. You like the Power Seed? That's fine. Too many seeds. Too many seeds. 21 grain though. That's enough grains. That's a lot of grains. I couldn't even name 21 grains, but Dave's Killer Bread puts them on there and they do great things for hiring

ex-offenders and giving them job opportunities. The whole story of Dave's Killer Bread is just fantastic. We'll get into that later. It's awesome. of Dave's Killer Bread is just fantastic. We'll get into that later. It's awesome. And Dave's Killer Bread, they changed the game. They made, because I love Oro Wheat.

I love the whole Oro Wheat canon of breads. Their double fiber is great. The country potato. Yeah. Or whatever it is. Yeah, the country potato from Oro Wheat. Oro Wheat makes fantastic bread. But Dave's Killer Bread kind of came in.

They changed it. They made a wetter bread. Yeah. And it's wetter. It's denser. There's even like more calories in it because it's just denser and wetter yeah uh so dave's killer bread 21 grain bun mama blackberry preserves oh the okay so the jar the jar that has the the checkerboard pattern on the top did you know that that uh that person who made that jam, I think they like fled Auschwitz or something. Really?

Yeah. Oh my God. There's like a crazy story with that one too. I had no idea. Crazy story with that. I should have looked up the stories behind all these brands. All I know is that you get the Bun Maman jam. Delicious.

It's just a delicious high quality. And I've gotten all the ones from the farmer's market and the nice organics. I've gotten the Harry's Berries Strawberry Preserves nothing for me beats bun maman and this is my fancy PB&J and then uh a new brand of peanut butter that I found that's like post Laura Scutters Laura Scutters OG they're the first but then you start getting like the Justins of the world but I found a brand that I really love called wild friends it's got a picture of a squirrel on it uh-huh and I use wild friends peanut cashew super butter with chia flax and honey and I'll tell you that the flax adds a savoriness to that peanut butter flax to me is actually a

really delicious flavor can I ask you is the flax ground in there or ground into it yum yum yum yummo right that changes a little bit of sweetness and I don't love alternate nut butters in my sandwiches. Like, I don't love an almond butter and jelly sandwich. I'm not into that. I want the peanut. But I will say the little bit of cashew cutting through the peanut with the flax added to it, a little bit of honey, so good. But that's my fancy version.

My normal comfort version is or wheat, whole wheat. Nice. Double fiber if I got it. Skippy natural natural which is a great product i can't not laugh at natural i don't natural trevor have literally poisoned my pure mind i hate you guys what was skippy natural oh or just the term naturals oh yeah the big skippy naturals out there no skippy Skippy natural. Okay. The term natural should be banned on all food packaging. I agree.

That's false. Yeah, it means nothing, right? But if you put natural on food packaging, 70% of people think that that means quote unquote healthier. That's true. And natural means nothing. You can use it with impunity. That said, Skippy natural is better than Skippy unnatural.

It just tastes better and i don't know you might feel a little bit better about buying it and then uh welch's grape jelly in in the grape for strawberry jelly debate i'm going grape jelly raspberry i don't know also do you know so uh welch actually like invented grape jelly they like patented in the 1920s they patented the process to puree Concord grapes and turn them into jelly. Concord grapes,

same thing that Manischewitz is made out of. I love, yo, one time I made a Concord grape popsicle. Changed the game. Dude, Concord grapes are delicious.

When people say that grapes don't taste like grape candy, they're referring to like red table grapes that they're eating. But Concord grapes do. Yeah, I agree a million times.

They taste so purple. No, no, a million times. They taste so purple. No, no, no, for sure. They taste purple. They taste purple. And oh, also the original name for it was Grape-a-lade, like marmalade. It was called Grape-a-lade. And I don't know how we lost that to the sands of history. I'm so mad about that.

I have to ask you a question. Yeah. Whenever you're making your PB&J and you're like, oh no, I have no more jam because you're English. Yeah. Do you ever like- It's like I'm the jam mist. what do you reach for in like that event do you reach for like honey like marmalade uh like what do you reach for because i always reach for the marmalade because it's the closest like dude when

i was a kid i used to eat peanut butter and marmalade sandwiches and like yeah now i tried it recently and i just i don't love it i love marmalade and butter or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Me too, me too. No, I, so I will say peanut butter and jelly is actually my alternate sandwich already because my number one is always peanut butter, honey, and banana. Yeah, yeah, yeah. To me, that is actually the best combination of things. Just fresh banana, got to be like super overripe, not to banana bread, kind of squishiness, but like really heavily brown spotted, just some honey drizzled right over the bananas, peanut butter, and then you crush the bread down a little bit to where the honey soaks into the bread.

And to me, that is the best. And then for that, Nicole, what I use is- You wrote this down? What? Somebody's prepared. Yeah, dude, I want to plug the good products. Wild Friends, shout out back to Wild Friends. Okay.

They have a product. It is a chocolate coconut peanut butter. And so it's got coconut oil in it. So like if you put it in the fridge, it gets really hard. I have the Earth Balance version of that, and I'm obsessed with the coconut peanut butter. Dude, so freaking good. So good. It's like, because I, I mean, I dig on chocolate and banana is a great combo. Peanut butter and

banana, peanut butter and chocolate, all of that works together. But I don't love Nutella just because Nutella is so sweet that it's like frosting to me, and I'd rather just have Duncan Hines frosting if I'm going that route that's rude and so

what I said it you're rude no I just Nutella it's not a nut butter people call it hazelnut but it's really just it's chocolate

yeah it's delicious but like if I want the nut butter I'm there for the nuts Nicole I'm there for the big naturals and the nuts you're gross

I can't I can't with you. The nut butter is like not sweetened. You get all the sweetness from the honey and from the banana. And then you get this almost like savory coconut chocolate peanut butter. Delightful. And that's my number one sandwich. And then once during the quarantine where I was like, yo, let's try and bridge the gap between PB&J and peanut butter honey banana.

And so I tried to make like a banana jam. I was just going to ask you, how come no banana jam on shelf? Well, so bananas, a banana jam on shelf is basically Gerber baby food, if you think about it. So funny. And if you've ever had Gerber baby food banana,

which I have as an adult male, because I tried to break the baby food world record. You sure did, boss. And I failed last time and I'm going to come for it again uh but you have to put so much citric acid in it because fruit like bananas specifically brown really oxidize very quickly it's why it's hard to have a shelf-stable avocado product and if they do it's just plied with citric acid because they need that to get it to not brown and so banana jam on a shelf would just be this kind of citric acid-y mush type of thing. But that said, I made one at home where I like really caramelized and burnt the bananas.

And I hit it with like honey, sugar, and a little bit of almond milk to see if I could get some of that starch from the almonds to kind of thicken. Okay, okay. And a little bit of vanilla extract. And that was really freaking good. That sounds really good. But that said, I put it in the fridge and it just got like hella brown the next day. Aw. And I still ate eggs.

You know, whatever. Brown's fine. Like you tried to throw away my salad in the fridge the other day because the next day. And I still ate eggs. You know, whatever. Brown's fine. Like you tried to throw away my salad in the fridge the other day because the avocado was brown. I'm sorry. That was a bad. That was a D move, Nicole. I'm sorry. And you know what I did?

I knew you got mad. I picked it. I knew you got mad. I was mad and I waited until now to bring it up because I dug that salad out of the trash and I ate it. I felt so bad. It was closed in the trash and it wasn't covered in much trash. But I ate that salad. I felt so guilty. And it was a tender green and it wasn't covered in much trash. But I ate that salad. I felt so guilty. And it was a tender green salad, which means I didn't even enjoy it.

Exactly. I knew you wouldn't like it anyways. I don't enjoy their food. Let me give it to you anyways, you trash raccoon. Yeah. Anyway. Josh, have you heard of a restaurant called PB&J LA? I sure have heard of it.

I've been to PB&J LA multiple times. I would like to know your opinion on the art, because I know you're all about the artisanal nut butters and whatnot. Yes, yes, yes. These guys do it quite well, in my opinion. Yeah, so what PB&J LA is, this place opened, God, maybe five years ago. It's been a while. And I believe the founder of Umami Burger was one of the people behind it.

But anyways, they opened. Yeah, Adam Fleischman. But they opened this little shack inside this big market in LA where they essentially make gourmet Uncrustables. They have a machine that they take like this brioche type bread and you can get, you know, all these different types of nut butters in there, all these different types of specialty jams. And then they have this whole menu of like weird specialty PB&Js, including savory ones. Like there's one with roasted tomato

and arugula on it with nut butter. Yeah, that's the Italian one. Yeah, there's one. There's like an Indian one with like a mango chutney and like a curry peanut butter. I've had almost all of them and I love it. There's one that's like an old fashioned one, right? They have an old-fashioned one.

They have a coffee one called the Red Eye. Yeah, with espresso mixed in the peanut butter. I think it is a very cool concept. And when this place debuted, a lot of people were mad because they're like, $8 for a PB&J, blurt, da-blurt, da-blur. And it's like, listen, dude, I'm just trying to pay for happiness, you know? I got money. What else am I going to spend that $8?

What, if I spent $8 on a turkey sandwich, would that bring me any more happiness probably not I find happiness in PB&Js yeah um that said everything I've had from there just like it just like didn't taste good in my mouth and it seemed like they could never figure out the gourmet uncrustable it's an ambitious ask you know what I mean yeah it's just an ambitious uh and there's a greater metaphor in that right yeah trying to take something that by definition to me, is best when it's heavily processed and then trying to turn that artisanal. Because even one of the, right? You talk about smuckers on crustables.

The way they make that is they're cutting the crust off the bread and all they do is they clamp it down to the machine and the bread is so sticky and wet and sugary that it sticks together, right? Yeah. Like a raviolo. Like a raviolo al uovo. It just sticks together. Right?

together, right? Like a raviolo. Like a raviolo al uovo. It just sticks together. Right? But then when you try and make like an artisanal bread, you know, and try and clamp it together to stick, I remember last time I went to this place they tried to stick the bread together and I took one bite and then the whole thing just opened up and like gobs of artisanal

jelly ended up on my pants. Oh man. Yeah, and I had to take the subway back and I had jelly in my pants and it was a bad time. But no, that's a greater metaphor here and that's why I'm glad neither of us for our ideal PB&J were like, you get a nice artisanal brioche from your local French

bakery and you slice that. And I've done that. Sure. I've done it with like nice long fermented artisanal bread, some like lodge bread and tried to make a PB&J and it just don't taste right. Yeah, I tried to make it in a pita once. Weird. Yeah.

Oh, I've done a lot of that. I've done a lot of like corn tortilla PB&Js. I've never done that. You've never done that? And then I have standards, honey. Ah ha! Snap, snap. No, because I mean, a lot of the times if I'm like about to go into a workout or something

and I haven't had any calories, I'll just like take whatever like rice cake or tortilla and I'll just like swipe that in peanut butter, squirt a jelly, get some fat, get some carbs in there and just kind of apply it to my face. One time at night I had like three spoons of peanut butter and then I couldn't breathe. And then I read it and I looked it up on Reddit, like peanut butter short of breath. And then I thought I was going to die. Yeah. Do you think you have like a late onset peanut allergy?

No, I thought I was dying because it was literally like stuck in my chest and I'm like, and I realized that I just ate it too fast. Wait, I know the exact, I know the exact thing that you're talking about.

Yeah, yeah. You know when you eat too many spoonfuls of peanut butter because you're like, whatever. It happens when I chug whole milk too fast.

It's just the fat kind of sticks in your gullet. I was like, I was about to call my parents and be like, I gotta go to a hospital because I ate too much peanut butter. And then I went on Reddit

and they're like, you just ate too much peanut butter too fast. Just breathe it out. I was like, thanks, Reddit. You know what I realized about peanut butter the other day?

What? That it's one of the uniquely American foods that I'm very proud of. I don't know if I'd call myself a particularly patriotic person, but the Olympics, I'm going to root for. Like I don't know if I'd call myself a particularly patriotic person, you know, but like, you know, the Olympics, I'm going to root for America. I like America.

I like America. I've been having a good time here, you know, no places without its faults. But like peanut butter is one of those things that makes me patriotic. That's nice. And I'm like, damn, I'm glad because a lot of other people hate peanut butter. So many other cultures around the world have peanuts, right? Peanuts are in Thai food, you know, Chinese food, Vietnamese food. Boiled peanuts are a big thing for Vietnamese snacking. Peanuts,

they grow them in the Inca Empire. And like, apparently they made peanut paste in the Inca Empire. But it's like peanut butter as we know it today is very uniquely American. Also, I thought George Washington Carver invented it. I was just about to say shout out to George Washington Carver. Yeah, general shout out to George Washington Carver for being one of the foremost American agricultural scientists. Well, the foremost American agricultural scientist. Yep. And developed like 105 different food products out of peanuts. But apparently, he was just like 20 years later than when peanut butter was like actually invented and kind of popularized. But he made like medications out of peanut butter or out of peanuts.

He like used peanuts for soil regeneration. Just a general shout out. kind of popularized. But he made like medications out of peanut butter or out of peanuts. He like used peanuts for soil regeneration. Just a general shout out. If you don't know a lot about George Washington and Carver just do a quick little look up.

Yeah, Google him. That could explain it better than we ever could. But that said peanut butter apparently made its like kind of debut as a mass product

in the 1904 World's Fair. Nice, okay. And then like it kind of ended up in high society and so you saw a bunch of weird peanut butter us Nice. Okay. And then like it kind of ended up in high society. And so you saw a bunch of weird peanut butter usages. Okay. Like at the Vanity Fair tea room, they were serving just like watercress with like a gob

of peanut butter. And they're like, maybe this is how you use it. And so I think it's funny how like peanut butter and jelly ended up becoming the big thing. And it's also something that like Europeans just don't understand. It's just such a good combo. I think it works. How do you feel about almond butter, sun butter?

Mad about it. Mad as hell about it. You don't like almond butter? I don't. Like, peanuts are the best nuts. Sign me up. Even if we're gone. No, they're not.

They're not one. They're not even a nut. They're a legume. I know, I know, I know. Cashew is the best nut. No, cashews are too fatty. They're too soft. They're a weak nut.

Almonds are too hard. They're a cold, unfeeling nut. I want a nice middle nut. Just a nut that rides the line of like, you know, it's just fatty enough, it's got good earthy flavor to it. Life is about the peaks and the valleys, man. Why can't your nut butter be a peak or a valley? I don't want that. I want a consistent nut butter. I have so many peaks and valleys in my own life.

Emotional highs, emotional lows, dealing with unexpected things in life, just grieving, a total elation. I don't want my nut butter. I especially don't want my PB&J to follow any of that pattern. I want that to be my rock. What are you going to do

when your kid has a peanut allergy? Oh, man. What's going to happen? I'm going to be my rock. What are you going to do when your kid has a peanut allergy? You're going to kill him. Oh, man. You know what? What's going to happen? I'm going to exposure therapy the kid. You can't listen. In schools, you cannot give peanut butter sandwiches. You literally cannot.

Like, schools are not free now. Are we the generation that kills? I know there's been a lot to do about millennials killing, you know, Chili's and Barnes & Noble and all this. Are we going to be the generation that kills peanut butter? We're killing, what, cereal already, right? I think so. Cereal's taking a big downturn. I think it depends on the allergies.

I think more and more kids are getting allergic to things. Let's just pretend that we're both doctors because we basically are, right? I could have done buckets in medical school. Oh, yeah. I would have probably really struggled in that. Anytime there's jeopardy, you know that the medical stuff, you look at me. Boom, alveoli. You look at me and I answer the medical jeopardy questions.

Boom, brachial. What is kidneys? What is avuncular breast iosis? Big natural breastiosis but no isn't something like kids got peanut allergies today because they haven't been exposed to peanuts or something

you know I actually read something about it and I think it's the way that Americans process peanuts that creates allergies and a lot of other countries the way that they like I think boiling or frying or cultivating they do it in a different way that creates less of a peanut allergy. That's been like one of the speculations about gluten intolerance in America too.

Might just be the way that it's milled and stuff. Yeah, the fact that we like, I guess, kill flour so early on in the process. Because a lot of bakers talk about baking with like live flour where the germ is still blah, blah, blah active or something. The endosperm. Yeah, that's it. Endosperm. And with all the big naturals and sperm talk.

But anyways, that's a lot of the theory of why so many Americans are quote unquote gluten intolerant. Sure. And I keep using quote unquote because I don't know that there's any. I think there's some validation. Yeah. I mean, all you can do is take people sort of at their word, right? There's no like mouth swab or you can go like, yes, you are gluten intolerant. But if you're like, I eat bread and my tummy hurts,

then it's like, well, yeah, obviously you should stop doing that. Fun fact, anything I eat, I feel like crap all the time. I could be allergic to so many foods and I don't know it just because I'm always hurting.

I have a fun activity for you. I realize I'm allergic to bananas. Josh, can you- Every time I eat a banana, my mouth hurts and I burp a lot. But that's your favorite sandwich. It's my favorite. I'm not going to stop eating it. Okay, I have a fun activity for you and I to bananas. Josh, can you- Every time I eat a banana, my mouth hurts and I burp a lot. But that's your favorite sandwich. It's my favorite. I'm not going to stop eating it.

Okay, I have a fun activity for you and I to do. One day, Maggie is going to drive us to an allergist and we're going to get allergy tested. Like, have you ever seen like whenever they poke your back with like a bunch of different things? Yeah, yeah. I think you and I should go do a full conclusive allergy test and find out what we're allergic to and never eat those things ever again. Oh, no.

I'll find out what I'm allergic to, but I'm going to make my own damn decision. Nicole, my body listens to me, okay? I don't take orders from my body. No, no, no, no. The pleasure center of brain control, we're steering the ship. We're the captain. But think about the quality of life if you find out you're allergic to coconut. No.

Well, I'm going to keep eating the coconut. I really love nata de coco, the little young coconut cubes. Wow, wow, wow. Every time I get a coconut water, the canned stuff, I try my best keep eating the coconut. I really love nata de coco, the little young coconut cubes. Wow, wow, wow. Every time I get a coconut water that cans stuff, I try my best to find the one with the cubes. Get the one with the pulp, dude. Shout out to my brother for showing me that stuff when I was like 12. Coconut water with pulp. Yeah.

Oh, and wait. I feel like there's some PB&J stuff they didn't touch on. But there's another thing. I would much rather do the allergy panel than do the- Panel. What? The allergy panel. Isn't that what it's called?

No, that's what it's called. You're right. Yeah, I'd much rather do an allergy panel than the other thing, which is systematically removing foods from your diet for like a month. Yeah. And then reintroducing them.

That sounds like hell on earth to me. Ugh, I can't. And I am so sorry to anyone who's ever had to do that because I would die. I think just the line of work that we're in and just the people we are. Yeah.

And like our general hobbies. Like I take so much joy in just going're in and just the people we are. Yeah, and like our general hobbies. Like I take so much joy in just going out and eating all the things I can. Whatever. Yeah. Crunchy or smooth? We already debated this in the podcast. You know, I love crunchy but for sandwiches I'm smooth. Are you really? You traitor! But let me tell you what it is.

No, Laura Scudder's is crunchy smooth peanut butter. Oh, I know what you mean. Yeah, the gritty. It's gritty. Yeah, it's a false binary between crunchy and smooth. There's crunchy smooth and there's gritty. And I like a good crunchy smooth peanut butter Oh I know what you mean yeah the gritty It's gritty yeah it's a false binary between Crunchy and smooth there's crunchy smooth and there's gritty And I like a good gritty peanut butter I like smooth in certain Instances I do love jif though I know I love a good mana texture

It's like um chawanmushi Right chawanmushi the steamed Japanese egg custard oh yeah yeah Okay you know yeah you're in it for the texture It's got a beautiful texture, like a flan. That's what I want in my peanut butter. Yeah, the peanut butter, you can make a really nice, like, when you get a good scoop of peanut butter,

it's sensual. It is. Peanut butter, people are sensuous. Peanut butter is sensual. Josh, what have we learned about each other? I think we learned that, Nicole, you and I seem more different than we actually are. And really, when we're out here, all we want is a big old jar of Jiffy Naturals, just a big natural peanut butter. And, you know, we want to both feel like we're making the best decisions for ourselves, that we're being like a little bit healthy.

You know, we try and practice moderation. You know, you seem to prefer to have seeds stuck in your teeth. I don't like that because I'm always worried that my teeth are going to fall out if a seed wedge is in between them. And that frightens me because I have a lot of stress dreams about going to the dentist. Okay. And I think that's it. All right, Nicole, I've heard what you and I have to say. Now it's time to find out what other wacky ideas are rattling out there in the Twitterverse.

It's time for a segment we call... Opinions are like casseroles! You know what we didn't get to talk about during... Dave's Killer Bread. No, okay, yeah. Wait, Dave's Killer Bread. One, Dave was a multiple-time convicted felon. I think so.

I believe, and then started selling his bread at farmer's markets. Yeah. And then now it's the most successful, fastest-growing bread brand in the history of the world. Looks like it. Good for Dave. Shout out to Dave. A true rags to riches. A true rags to riches.

Employees, former felons, everyone deserves a second chance, all that, prison industrial complex. Number two, World War II. You love talking about World War II. I love number two World War II you didn't get to you love talking about World War II I love talking about World War II's influence on food

such a history buff you are World War II peanut butter and jelly were in rations because they were both heavily domestic products that they didn't have to import

and use extra shipping costs so they were not only in rations but peanut butter and jelly stamps were also in the food stamp book that they gave to like civilians

for rations and so that was a big part in popularizing peanut butter and jelly stamps were also in the food stamp book that they gave to civilians for rations. And so that was a big part in popularizing peanut butter and jelly across America. That's very interesting. World War II rations. Thanks, World War II. Thanks, World War II. You did some bad things specifically to the groups of people that we identify with. Peanut butter.

Yeah, what about peanut butter? There we go. All right. Take it away, Josh. Back to the opinions. All right. Take it away, Josh. Back to the opinions. First, we got MJ McD, fruit plus cheese is a far more delicious pair than meat plus cheese.

This is loaded. Let's analyze the two terms here. We got meat, animal flesh, cheese, fermented titty milk. I think that all milk comes from titties except almond milk. Almond titties. Do we do, have we ever done, should almond milk be called milk? We should. We should do that.

We will. Anyways. Write that down. I think meat plus cheese is maybe a bit overrated. Okay, this is sending me charcuterie vibes. Yeah. And, you know, let me tell you, since I've moved in and I've been on my own, I make a mean cheese board. Do you eat the meats and the cheeses together?

No, because I have a kosher house. But when I go out... Thou shalt not boil the cash in thy mother's milk. You best believe that I'm going to town on some prosciutto on whatever else. But do you enjoy the cheese with the prosciutto? To you, do they go part and parcel? I do, but recently the more that I enjoy fruit and cheese, like a pear,

an apple, a grape, paired with the proper cheese. It's like phenomenal. I don't know. Gosh, I don't know. I love I had a nice fruit salad out at brunch that had like a whipped ricotta on it. You had a fruit salad? Yeah.

I love fresh fruit, dude. I eat a lot of fresh fruit. That's the thing that I really enjoy. Yeah. They get to fruit during quarantine. Good for you. I realize I love it. I could just eat bushels of grapes.

Also, Whole Foods, why is grapes so expensive? Why are you buying your grapes from Whole Foods? I shouldn't have. It was just, it was like on the way back from like, I was buying a shirt at the mall and there was a Whole Foods on the way back and we're like, oh, let's do it. Never do your whole week's grocery shopping from Whole Foods. No, no, no. My God. No, no, no, no.

You gotta get your berries from Ralph's or Pavilion's and then you're gonna get the jarred stuff stuff the good jarred stuff you get from Whole Foods yeah that makes sense that makes sense anyways what I'm saying is I kind of love all of these things separately I don't know that I need cheese to touch any of them like I

love a cheesesteak cheeseburger but that's really only American cheese I don't get anything I don't get anything out of any other cheese on a cheeseburger other than American really ditto with a cheesesteak. The only cheese I want on it is either American or Cheez Whiz. I don't know if I love it. I love a good cheese, but I kind of just like it separately as its own thing.

Or like in a salad, I love it. That's fair. Cheese on vegetables. Yeah, this is what's not represented here. Cheese on vegetables is the best. And that's what I want. Like even on pizza, I don't need the meat and cheese together. Yeah, me either.

I'm not the biggest like pepperoni or like chicken. I love a vegetable and cheese pizza. And then if it's like a meat pizza, I don't even need cheese on it. Give me the tomato and the meats and the bread. Yeah, the idea of a meat lovers pizza honestly makes me like low key sick. Yeah, it's honestly not my favorite. A lot of meat. It is not my favorite, especially pepperoni is such a strong, strong flavor.

I love it, but i'd much rather have a veggie pizza yeah i don't really get down you know what a nice thing though is like an apple pie with cheddar baked into the crust that's a cool dish yeah that's good that's a cool i'm down with that yeah yeah yeah yeah okay the josh foster says my opinion is that if i had to choose only one food, it would be chicken. Yeah, agreed. I have the same opinion. My one food, frick, it would be pasta. Yeah, I guess if you had to live off of one food for the rest of your life, probably beans.

Beans are probably the best actual answer. As far as sustaining life. I think beans. Complete protein, good carbs, fiber. My want is pasta. My need is beans. Yeah, I think beans. Complete protein. I mean, carbs. My want is pasta. My need is beans. Yeah, I feel that. The thing with chicken though, if I had to choose one meat for the rest of my life, it would be bone-in skin on chicken thigh.

Mine would be probably tuna. Can? No, any kind of tuna. I guess you can can your own tuna if you're just using a whole tuna. I can do any kind of tuna. What kind of tuna? Are you talking about like ahi? Are you talking about like a bluefin or albacore? Just tuna. Just tuna. Just tuna. All tuna.

You get mercury poisoning, you die. Oh, I will? Sometimes I eat chicken thighs though and I'm just like, there's no better meat. I like chicken thigh too. What a treat, dude. And you almost can't overcook them. Yeah, I like chicken breast and chicken thigh. Chicken breast is good, but you gotta, there's like a five degree temp range where your chicken breast is either good or crappy.

I made a mean gochujang chicken the other day. Yeah? With chicken breast? Yes. You brine it? No. I don't know. I don or crappy. I made a mean gochujang chicken the other day. Yeah? With chicken breast? Yes. You brine it? No. I don't know. I marinated it,

which you don't believe it too. I need to issue a retraction. I do believe in marination. I was in a mood when I said that earlier. But no, man, brining chicken breast, that's a good time. All right, we got at Blue Cat Silver, warm cake is better than cold cake. Melty frosting be damned. Live a good time. All right. We got at Blue Cat Silver. Warm cake is better than cold cake.

Melty frosting be damned. Live a little bit. I once tried to pour ganache over a hot cake and I ended up with like a gallon of ganache just on my kitchen floor and I was trying to like scoop it back up. Like, no, my son. Oh, man. Warm cake versus, yeah, I think I'd agree with that. This reminds me of my friend Yvonne Sipos.

Shout out to Yvonne Sipos out there. She was the, so I worked at a chocolate store when i was 19 years old i was young i was and i was impressionable she would just eat like a monster i loved her she would just she would warm up chocolate cake and then she would pour strauss creamery cream on the cake. Yes. And the warm cake Uno Leche cake. The warm chocolate cake would absorb the cream and she would be like eat this

and I would be like oh my god this is one of the best food experiences I've ever had. Dude yeah. No I agree. I do the same thing.

I literally microwave cake and I put milk on it. I love warm cake but again the melty frosting eh you know eh

If I could have both like warm cake maybe you need the frosting on the side. Yeah, like a- Have like a nice room temp. Like a chip and dip. Yeah. I've started eating microwave mug cakes. Because that's a nice little treat.

You just mix- Are they individual? But yeah, yeah, yeah. They're not mine, they're Julia's. But you know, it's one of those things like she'll keep in the house, like she keeps little pirouette cookies in the house. Yeah. You know, the like thin pastry tubes, the chocolate in the middle.

Of course, of course. Fantastic. And she got a little microwave mug cake. If she could be a, if Julia was any cookie, she would be a pirouette cookie. Oh, she's such a pirouette. She is. She is. She's a step below Milano, right at the pirouette stage.

She's such a pirouette cookie. But anyways, these little mug cakes, they're a delight because, I mean, one, a microwave, it's just a steam-powered cooking machine. Yeah. So it steams the cake. It stays moist. So good. And it's just a hot, steaming little three bites of cake at the end of the night. Yum.

And we split one, and ugh, what a treat. You put a little ready whip on it, and it melts into it. Delicious. That's a delight. And I kind of hate cakes that are taken straight out of, like, the icebox. Like, that's been a weird trend at LA restaurants. We're at fancy restaurants and be like our retro icebox cake. And it's just like a cold piece of cake and everything's just hard in it.

And I'm like, I don't want it. LA needs to like revamp a lot of its dessert. Figure it out, LA. Figure out your desserts. Hire pastry chefs. They do good work. Yeah. Pastry chefs are very talented.

Like give them their flowers. That's what I'm saying. Okay. Ooh. At Kenzie underscore Artie, grilled cheese with bacon bits in it is god food. Yes. Correctamundo, because the bacon bits slightly melt and render with the melted cheese.

And then bacon bits over bacon strips, because you get bacon in every bite. It's basically a bacon-infused cheese, making it still a grilled cheese and not a melt. I agree. Dip it in ranch. You win. I don't like bacon in my grilled cheese. No. What the hell? It's not for me.

Nicole, why have you forsaken me? It's not for me. What are you, God? It's not my thing. I do love a good basil pesto grilled cheese. Yeah, that's fair. That's my place. Bacon grilled cheese and then you open it up and you put a cold slice of tomato in there.

And I don't know if that's a grilled cheese at that point because we're getting into another territory, but that's a great sandwich in my opinion. It doesn't do it for me. I can't. I can't enjoy it. I can understand it. Bacon's a really powerful flavor. Yeah.

Sean Patrick Little says Dr. Pepper on Southern Comfort is better than rum and Coke. I think you might be right. What? I like Southern Comfort a lot. Why? Okay. Who doesn't like Southern Comfort? The only time I had Southern Comfort was when, let's imagine I was of legal drinking age,

because I'm sure I was. So you were 21? Of course. And it was outside at like a UCLA tailgate game, and it was just like 100 degrees, and Southern Comfort, it was, the Southern Comfort was probably 100 degrees, so it was in the trunk, and we're drinking it straight out of the bottle, and putting it in one of those like beer drinking helmets, straight Southern Comfort. And so I only have bad associations with it.

Also, Southern Comfort technically is not a whiskey. It is technically a whiskey flavored vodka. Yeah, I'm down. Great. I'm down half. Dr. Pepper I don't love as an alcohol mixer either because there's not enough acid in it. Okay.

Coke has more acid in it. And I think rum and Coke probably works better than whiskey Coke as well. I don't like rum and Coke either. I don't like rum and Coke. I like Jack and I think rum and Coke probably works better than whiskey Coke as well. I don't like rum and Coke either. I don't like rum and Coke. I like Jack and Coke and Jack and Coke. You prefer Jack and Coke? Is that what it's called? Yeah.

Jack, like whiskey, got a little bit more bite, a little bit more spice to it. But I think rum, you get that sweeter palate on it. I haven't been to a bar in a long time. I don't remember what drinks are called. Well, I mean, I would never get like a rum and Coke at a bar. I always, you know, gin and tonic is my go- If it's a bar, like a party bar

where you're supposed to get you know, a drink like that and you're not supposed to order an actual cocktail. I don't think I've ever just had like rum and something. Really? Yeah.

I think in my mind I'm just like rum is way too sweet. Oh, interesting. No, I think rum coke with a splash of lime called a Cuba Libre is like a pretty good drink. And then dark and stormy rum, a little rum and ginger beer. of lime called a Cuba Libre is like a pretty good drink.

And then dark and stormy rum, a little rum and ginger beer. I've had a dark and stormy. That's nice. That's good. A little spiced rum in there. That's good. Dr. Pepper's and Mixer, I don't mess with it. All right.

At Jeff McCourtney, Spindrift is the ultimate seltzer by a mile. Yes, sir. Agreed. Spindrift is everything I want. It is just a ton of citrus juice It's so acidic In sparkly water, I know, and I can handle so much acid That's why my enamel is terrible

Oh Josh, it's so acidic Sometimes it's too acidic for me No, you gotta lean into it, you gotta get the heartburn I like LaCroix, I love Spindrift If it's there, I'll drink it, I love Spindrift I had a weird moment the other day where I let A LaCroix kind of sit on my desk for like 20 minutes. And then I took a sip of it and it was kind of flat, kind of warm.

And it just reminded me of drinking like a flat, warm beer at a party. And it made me almost gag. I like almost gagged on a LaCroix the other day. It was a really weird experience. Okay, the best like seltzer water or whatever is the San Pellegrino Limoncello or the Blood Orange. Yeah, but that's just soda. I like it. That's not the sugar. And it's delicious, of course. I like it the most. It's candy drink. No, Toponcello, or the Blood Orange. Yeah, but that's just soda. I like it. That's not the sugar in it.

It's delicious, of course. I like it the most. It's candy drink. No, Topo Chico is the best. I don't care for Topo Chico. You don't care for Topo Chico? I thought I knew you. It's okay.

You don't know nothing. You only know what I show. This is the busiest. You only know what I show. We're all wearing a mask. Halloween's just the day where we decide to show it to others. I also like Perrier and Pellegrino. I love my mom.

Oh, Perrier's good. My mother-in-law always has a bottle of Pellegrino waiting for me. And Pellegrino's too flat. It's not a bubble. I want sharper bubbles.

She knows I love the fizzy bubelech. Oh, the fizzy bubelech. The gasos? What? Is that a I think it's an Armenian brand. Oh, yeah.

The peach one? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I've had it at Mini Kebab. It's really good. Yo, Armenian tarragon soda. Oh. That's where it's at. That's good. I've had it at Mini Kebab. It's really good. Yo, Armenian tarragon soda. Oh! That's where it's at. That's good. I don't know if we're talking about the best seltzer anymore, but

Armenian tarragon soda is a friggin' delight. You wanna know why it's so good? Cause after you eat something like heavy or meaty or like, you know, just heavy, that tarragon soda cuts through all of that. You let out a loud belch and you can go on about your day. Oh, day. That's why it's

the best. It's like the way Tamarindo Haritos cuts through the tacos. Soda pairings. Give me that. We should do that. We should have an episode where we eat the food and then the best complimentary soda to go with it. Orangina with jambon beurre. Yo, what's that?

I love Orangina! I love Orangina! It's the pulp. It's the pulp. It's a pulpy soda. We just love pulp, don't we? But I don't love orange juice with pulp. I love pulpless orange juice, but I love the pulp in Orangina. There's an Italian soda. It's like a little bit bitter,

and I'm not going to remember the freaking name of it. It's not Limonata? It's not Limonata, no. It's like a dark soda that's got kind of like these... We've featured it on GMM before. We have. It is a freaking delight, though. It's got one of those that's got kind of like these. We've featured it on GMM before. We have. It is a freaking delight, though. It's got one of those like quinine-y, one of those weird roots that they dug up in the 1800s and put in aperitif. I've had it before, too. Delicious. That soda would be really good with like, I don't know, I'd chase some pizza with that.

It's just like a darker, danker cola. Really good. Ooh, here's a good one. Mutually Assured Distraction. Great name. I used to eat peanut butter and American cheese sandwiches. You sure did. I understand why you would like this.

You know what I mean? I don't like it, but I know why you would like it. No, I don't love this. I've had it before. I've made it. I've tried it grilled. I've tried it plain. It's not my thing.

I think it's because the texture of American cheese and peanut butter are too similar. So similar. That said, one of my my favorite sandwiches i think you know where i'm going with this peanut butter and this has to be crunchy for whatever reason this has to be crunchy peanut butter with bananas and mayonnaise boom banana mayonnaise peanut butter my high school girlfriend freaking disgusting whose parents were from kentucky from louisville kentucky and they would eat banana mayonnaise peanut butter sandwiches. That sounds vomit. Dude, it's really good.

I didn't think it would be good, but it's the salty sweet. Because like peanut butter, people think of it as sweet, and there is sugar added to it. And peanut butter, but it's really not that much. There's a lot more salt in peanut butter than sugar. I get that. And so I think that's why it works with jelly so well. But that said, you get the extra salty and a little bit of acid from the mayonnaise countering the sweet of the banana. I understand why people would be disgusted by it.

Bananas covered in mayonnaise. Bananas. But it is truly one of life's delights. Like I don't eat it very often. But every time I do, I'm just like, man, this is good food. You start to rethink your life decisions when you're spreading mayonnaise on the final piece of bread about to put it down because you're like, this doesn't seem right, but then it gets in your mouth, and that's good stuff. All right, we got, here we go.

Aaron underscore grainy. When I'm sad, I melt chocolate and peanut butter in the microwave and eat it with a spoon. It's amazing. Aaron, why are you sad? You want to talk about it? I mean, we all get sad sometimes. When I'm sad, you know what's the best thing to, why are you sad? You want to talk about it? I mean, we all get sad sometimes. When I'm sad,

you know what's the best thing to do when you're sad? Huh? Cry. Yeah. Let it out. I guess. I don't...

Let it out. I haven't cried in like over a decade. Oh my God. Do you want to cry together? I don't think so. No, no, no. I just...

I rage lift. Maggie, screw the allergy test. Me and Josh are going to sit in a room and cry together. You're going to try and make me cry? I'm not going to make you cry. You're going to cry in your own volition. What's your sad food other than crying?

What's your go-to sad food? I don't have a sad food. What do you mean you don't have a sad food? I don't have a sad food. Of course, everyone has their sad food. I haven't thought about it. You talk about eating prosciutto out of the fridge. Oh, that's it.

That's it. Yeah, that's it. That's the one. That's the one. That's your sad food. Yeah, that's my sad food. Yeah, no, mine's peanut butter and jelly. Truly, it is my sad food.

It's my comfort food because it's my sad food. Aw, sorry. Ben, on that note, thank you for, well, being sad is a natural. Anyways, on that note, thank you for listening to A Hot Dog is a Sandwich. If you want to hear more from us here in the Mythical Kitchen, we got new episodes for you every Wednesday. If you want to be featured on Opinions or Like Casserole, you can hit us up on Twitter at MythicalChef or Anhenizade with the hashtag OpinionCasserole. And for more Mythical Kitchen, check us out on YouTube where MythicalChef or Enhenizade with the hashtag OpinionCasserole. And for more Mythical Kitchen, check us out on YouTube

where we launch new videos every week. And of course, if you want to share pictures of your fabulous dishes, hit us up on Instagram at Mythical Kitchen. See you next time.