A Lot On Your Plate - S2 Ep3: Ready Meals, Phone Sex & Dot Cotton

Episode Date: February 21, 2023

This week on A lot on your plate podcast we chat all things Love Island, Rihanna’s Super Bowl performance & would you rather have fingers for toes or toes for fingers?- - - - - - - - - -Follow us on IG @alotonyourplatepodYour HostsJess (@JustJessFood)Zoe (@ZoeQuinnnn)Produced ByCobalt Creative (@cobaltmediauk)For Business Enquiries - [e-mail] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello and welcome, here we go. Hello and welcome back to a Loss on Your Plate podcast, season two, episode three with me, Jess, and my lovely co-host, Zoe Quinn. She's ignoring me. Hi there. Hi. I actually was about taking off guard there. Why? You didn't think I was starting?

No. So I'm ready now. I had to clear my lungs because I am ill as hell. Yeah, again. Again, again. You're just a walking germ at this point. And I've got no explanation as to why. It's doing my nutting.

I know when you were saying it quite, um... Is there something you would like to say, do you? He's like, I can tell you exactly why. He's raising his hand. I sound like I smoke 60 a day. I wasn't even on the vapes this weekend either. I avoided them.

I've quit them. Not avoiding them, I've quit. Right. What I was going to say is you were quite passionately talking in the chat about, like, COVID, your immune system's fucked all that. But, like, sorry it'd burst your bubble, but I think everyone's in the same boat and a lot of people are fine. No, Zoe, this is where you're wrong.

This is where you're all wrong. And this is what I want to talk about. So I posted it on my Instagram and said, I'm sick of being sick. I'm sick every month. I never, ever used to be sick. This is not, I'm not exaggerating. I was never sick.

The amount of messages I'm talking in the hundreds of people saying to me too, me too, me too, me too. Can't explain it. I'm constantly sick, can't get rid of it. It's the same sort of symptoms. Yeah, you might be fine. That's great. But remember, you are, you are going into work daily every day. I'm actually always on my own. And then when I'm always then around people, that is probably why. I don't go on public transport anymore. I don't really leave my house unless I'm with groups of people in a big social situation. So it's either that or and then people saying to me, working in nurseries. A lot of people said that they think, a lot of people said that they think it was because of COVID in lockdown, which I thought like that was,

I didn't actually get COVID in the first lockdown. I think I got it in the first time in this past 12 months. But don't they mean you're away from the public for like that amount of time? But I think, I thought that was ages ago that I was completely shut off from everybody. Quite a lot of people saying to me that I need to take vitamin D, magnesium zinc, all that. But yeah, lots of people are in the same boat. That's a shame. But yeah, there is also a lot of people like you. That are great. Yeah, so yeah, I need some answers. Well, you're on the end, that's the main thing.

Yeah, but give it a week. Let's lift the spirits. It's hard. It's a Wednesday. I know it's hard. I'm surprised I'm here, to be honest, but you know we've got job to do. Well, I'm glad you've made it because speaking to myself wouldn't have been fun. Well, me and gee could have actually carried it.

Go on what you've been up to then? Well, in the last week, I haven't done much. I actually had a very chill weekend. Went to Brayhead Shopping, set. Now, why is that still alive? It's so bad. How did you go there for? Something to do.

Primark? No, I walked in there and it was just he even so I walked right back out and just had some lunch and that was pretty much it and then obviously Valentine's Day went out for dinner. Oh yeah, how was your valentines? I saw that you had roses and rose petals and balloons. Obviously every year without a fail. And what did you do for him?

Got them jammies chocolate and a card. Pajamas? We know Jason loves a pair of pajamas. Oh yeah, he does. We wear's pyjamas every night. Does he actually? Yeah. I'm so here for that.

I love that. We both get our jammies on, watch Love Island. Cup of tea, few biscuits. Fox's biscuits. No, we spoke about that. That's high end. You've got too much cash. Maryland cookies for me.

I actually had Millie's cookies at the weekend, and I don't rate them. I don't think they're that good. A Millie's cookie, I haven't had a name in years and years. I remember everyone used to buy the big, large ones for someone's birthday. They are good. because they're like dead soft with icing. Yeah.

Just a classic chocolate chat. Yeah. Marylands better. Yeah, they're basic bitch now. Mm-hmm. Yeah, over it. So, did the job. That was very nice.

So that's what I did. What have you been up to? I have been literally bedbound. I can't explain to you how bad this time around has been. I was in agony. Every time I stood up, I thought I was going to faint, had a bath, not yesterday, yeah, last night actually. And I honestly thought I was going to die.

when I got out of it. Richard was like, are you okay? I was pure panting. I was like, oh my God, you know, you're just like, pop a head rush, but I've had a very tough couple days. To be fair, I was giving it hard because you actually had been

your landmark this time. Yeah, I really was. So you do have sympathy. Yeah. For me. But it's a shame because I don't know why this time round. Everyone was sick on the ski trip,

but we'd been back a good week. I know, but it's maybe just catching up to you. But this time it was like razor blade throat and then now it was my body, like my skin. I felt like I could rip my skin off. Anything that, every time something touched to me, I was like, ah. No, you're sending shivers down my spine.

Yeah, it was awful. But night and day, how I feel in terms of like my body, now it's just, as you can hear, in my sinuses. And your nostrils? In my big nostrils. Oh, well. Tragic times. But my valentines was cute.

Well, it wasn't that cute because obviously I was in bed, but I did wake up to a nice card, which I was quite surprised about. Even though he does always get me a card, but he did say him not that bothered this year because obviously I was well and well I couldn't go out. But he wrote me a beautiful card and he wrote ten things that he loved about me

and it was so sweet. And were the nice things? Like beyond thoughtful. Wow. Honestly, I was roaring because I was emotional but I was like, oh my God, that is so lovely.

Can we get one example? Or two personal? No, I won't show them all because it is kind of personal, but I would say the nicest one maybe was, let me ever think, because it was loads.

Well, there was ten. Yeah, and they were quite long. Oh, a paragraph, per one. No, no, no, no. He just said, he loves how much I love love. That was one of them. Oh, that's nice. And one of them was how loved I make him feel.

And I think that's a huge compliment to give someone. Like, I always say to him, do I make you feel loved? Yeah. Because I tell him every goddamn second every day too much. And then sometimes I think, does it lose its meaning? Yep. And but he knows that he's loved. He feels loved.

Well, that's love. Wonderful. And number one was he loves how happy I make people just buy my energy. Aw. That's lovely, isn't it? Look at him.

Romantic. He's the grumpiest bastard on earth. Isn't he though? Usually, so he has got away with words and he can be really romantic when he wants. So yeah, 10 points to Dickie there. Okay, lovely.

Just as we are, oh, it's pancake day. It is, you're right? Pancake Day. Shrove Tuesday? Shrove. What does Shrove mean? Pancakes? Pass.

Pass. I'm Googling. You Google. Also... Isn't this the day where Lent starts, well, Lent starts and ends on Easter? Is that not where it's supposed to be? You're emptying over your cupboards for 40 days of Lent, so you use up all your ingredients to make pancakes.

That's it. Wow. Didn't know that. So here you go. Shrove Tuesday or Pankake Tuesday. It's the day before Ash Wednesday, the first day of Lent. Observe. Right, that's enough.

I'm a bad Christian. Okay, anyway, I hope everyone's having fun-filled pancakes full of wonderful goodness and sweets. Maybe an unpopular opinion, but I'm not a pancake lover. Neither am I, a crepe girl. Are you? I like a crepe, bigger, thinner. Yeah, I'm not even that keen on them either, to be honest. I don't ever have either, but I will have pancakes.

All right, waffles, maybe better. I would never, ever go somewhere and get pancakes for breakfast. But listen, sister, do you remember anyone out there that's from Glasgow? Potluck. Yes, actually. That was the one place that I would love to go for pancakes. I forgot that existed. Same. Whatever happened to that place.

Does it still exist or does it not? No, it doesn't exist anymore. I think if I'm aware it was a couple that owned it, they separated. Right. And then one of them opened something else and then they opened, the other person owned, opened something else. But I don't know what that is. That was a real gem that was, wasn't it?

Because it was like the proper Japanese souffle pancakes with the lemon curd and the bloke. It was so good. I will make pancakes. I say make, you just put the mix in the pan really, don't you? But I like it with maybe Nutella, a couple of strawberries. Yeah. But I would never do, like, bacon and syrup.

Do you not? See, that's a nice combination, that. I don't like bacon, though. No, course you do, actually, yeah. That's one thing. But anyway, happy pancake day. Happy pancake day. But I didn't make as pancakes for the pod for us but I wanted today

because I was in M&S yesterday. We'll talk a little bit more as to why I was in M&S later on in the pod. But I came across the freezer section and they had pastal dinata. You know the Portuguese tarts? No, but I know now. In, oh, maybe you shouldn't have popped them in there. Maybe should let them go a bit soggy. Anyway, they had them in the freezer section

so I thought, you know, you can actually bake them at home. Obviously you can get them everywhere, can't you? But I thought, oh, that's so cute. So I baked us some. So he's been eye-knock, a little bit of piece of tin foil that's been sat on the air. I don't understand that that could possibly be. Why have I been around you for five minutes

and I've got a chest to cough? Is that? Is it sugar? It's icing sugar. Just a bit suspicious bitch. So do you want some ice and sugar on yours? Absolutely. Gee, would you like one? No, no thanks.

Oh, I baked you on. You're just a grateful bastard. Right. So ice and sugar is what they do are in Lisbon with a little bit of sweet cinnamon. Do you want a bit of that? Yep. I want the full bang. The full experience.

There you go. Let's try them. Let's test them. Take me to Portugal. I mean, these look nothing like the ones in Portugal, but we'll give it a well. Why is the bottom of the thing wet? Come on. Try it. Mmm.

Mmm. They're lovely them. Hmm. Aren't they? Gorgeous. A bit of a soggy bottom, but... I don't mind a soggy bottom. Soggy thing.

We're back to that. Well, I'm pleasantly surprised. Had a few messages on that. My insidstead today said, no, give us a review. Cheese also bought us giant strawberry haribos and... Caramel nibbles. Dairy milk caramel nibbles.

We're feasting today. Mmm. That was nice, I enjoyed that. No, custard and tart. Not your bag. Oh well. That was lovely. So I definitely recommend them, everyone.

I've got pastry stuck at the back of my throat, you know that way. Mmm, they were nice If there's anything else you want Me and Zozo to try on an episode Please let us know because we want to try them Anything new you see in the shops Any TikTok trends

Any drinks, any snacks Any meals you want me to make? I'll do it See what's happened in the world this week then Rihanna came back We have to discuss that We have to, Super Bowl Did you watch Super Bowl G

I watched it the next day I started watching everybody was very late Early in the morning Oh yeah, I could never stay up I have to watch it the next day Yeah Also, I feel like I was pleasantly surprised because I didn't want her to not do her bangers

but what I will say is she didn't give me shivers and she can give me shivers but I know you didn't feel the same No, I didn't feel the same because I think I mentioned in season one that this has been in my Google calendar for like six months I'm in Rihanna Stan

but I do agree that I think because she obviously announced that she was pregnant she's not going to be going twerking across the floor is she No, which was a shame and her dancers definitely carried it But, just seeing her face, I loved it. She's so gorgeous. I like that she's pregnant again.

Yeah. Hasn't she just popped one out? It was like nine months ago. How? So that way isn't really even one yet. Oh my God. She's just popping them out so she can come back. A sap rocky.

I get it. That was good, that one. Yeah, so I'm glad that she's back. I was presently surprised. She did the bangers. I thought she'd come up doing that one she did for that film. Yeah, for me. And as much as that's beautiful.

I actually like that song. It is nice, and it was for a nice. it was for that guy, wasn't it, that I passed away? I thought it was for Wakanda. Wakanda. Oh. Hakunda. What's the...

What's the... You'll know. Wakanda. Wakanda. I sound like Doc Cotton when I laugh, honestly. It's not a real place, though. It's a place in a film. Oh, right.

There's a country within a film. Right, okay. Anyway, I was glad she came back and she did her bangers. She did. But the sad thing is, but I don't think we're getting a new album anytime soon. Well, I know. And also, she could record whilst being pregnant. You never know.

Yeah, of course you could. Let's not get disappointed at the moment. Yeah. Because I feel like this is her moment to really steal the Beyonce fans because I feel she's lost a lot of them. Yeah. Well, she's lost a fan in us,

but they are people that pure love Beyonce out there, aren't they? I know, but I just don't. If I came in it, I'm interested, so as everyone else. You'd have seen that everyone is like us. No, I don't. It's quite a general consensus, I feel. Yeah. And I've been seen a lot of people on Twitter

and TikTok raging because Harry Stiles won. Yeah, the award. How is anybody mad that he won that album versus Beyonce? Beyonce had one good song on that album. Which, by the way, I didn't even know it was her when I heard it earlier night. Is she not? No. Is it like, you won't bring my song? I didn't know that was her, but I'm not down with the charts, down with kids.

So I just think Harry Stiles won that fair and square. He deserved every award he got at the Brits. Album of the Summer. Another thing that was. on last week, the Brits. Yes, I wasn't, I wouldn't watch it. I watched some of it and I think there was some sort of technical sound issue

because everyone's performance was pretty shit. Was it? How was Stormsy? Oh, he was good. He's never shit though, is he? No. But what I thought was is he looking out to the crowd at Maya and like, oh, because that song was about her that he sang. I know, and she was there looking gorgeous. She was looking absolutely gorgeous. I think she's one of the

most beautiful women on this planet Earth. I agree. But recently, in that show, sorts of ways of time, she did the Brits, and then Love Island aftershun and both. I didn't like her hair, but... Yeah, because she has that, what's that fringe? She puts that fringe on. She does suit it, though. Is that a full wig then?

Must be a lace wig. She then obviously went and flew to South Africa and then did Love Island. Is that what you're saying? Yeah, but also, not she did aftershund here, but she's here there and everywhere. She is. She's flying at me exhausted. Somebody must be absolutely heartbroken to let her go. I know in the end did you see, she got flowers on her story, but then said, ha-ha kid and it was from a brand or something?

Yeah, it was a brand, yeah. I was like, why didn't you play that out a bit more but her DMs must have been crazy? Yeah, they would have been. What thoughts on Love Island then? Three minutes you've got. Right, okay, um, updated thoughts are don't care about any couple at this point.

All you's go find someone else because it's getting boring. Million per cent. I think Tanya should definitely go with the new guy Martin in Casas more. Yeah, nice. Well, I'm a bit disappointed, I will say that. Doesn't shock me.

But I'm like, do you know what? You had no one liked you for a while, so now someone like, she'd get a kiss. That's what it, do you know what the issue is with Castoramor? And this is what always annoys me. They actually have visibility of the house at that point, don't they? So everybody that goes into Casimir has watched the show. It's not like they're isolated.

They all watch it. They know who's the favourite. People would be gunning to go for Will. No, no offence. I know we all like we love Will now. But initially, if you'd never known who he was or whatever, you wouldn't have fancied him. You would have found him probably quite strange.

It still is. And then she goes in and she's like, oh, I didn't really see sparks flying, blah, blah, blah. She goes in, she's like, he's going to be the winner, so I'm going to go in, I'm going to win this. I'm not saying she probably doesn't fancy him, but it seems like an easy, easy target for me. Yeah, I know what you mean.

But I also think what's going to happen with him, and there was another guy as well that I thought about it with. Maybe it was Tom, is that they'll do all this kissy kissing nonsense with other girls, but then they won't pick them. Yeah. And then their current partner will come back, all happy, the same that what happened with whoever it was last year.

Remember that happened with Millie and Liam? Yep. And then it all comes out. So I'm like, same old in it? I know. It's a tough one but... I think there might actually... I said last week that I think Casey might bring it back and win it but now I'm actually off that bandwagon as I knew it would be and now I'm thinking that Ron and Lana might actually become the favourites because they're going to stick with each other and he's going to prove everyone wrong and all the usual nonsense. That's what I'm thinking because Ron's not really having much

screen time. No. By the way, we're five episodes behind by the time this one comes out, so things will change, classroom will be over by the time. But I think it's quite interesting for us to speak about it so people can hear how our opinions change each day. So yeah, I think, I still don't, I still dislike Ron. Why are you smelling your microphone? Oh. Do you actually have a brain cell? Sorry, I was like, why you're sleeping? Stop that right now. So, yeah, so my favourites don't have any.

Scottish girls gone in there, I saw. Love that for them. I love that for us. I actually think she's the first Scottish person, I might say ever, that speaks what I class is normal Scottish. Yeah, she's got a lovely voice. Which isn't normal, obviously.

I know everyone's got different accents, but I just mean for us as like Glasgowians. Yeah. Or that kind of accent. Whereas everyone's always had. a bit of a twang. Yeah, she's got a lovely voice. Isn't she far around here?

I think she is, but she's also bold as brass. Yeah, she seems it. But I love that though. I know, and you need to be when you're going to cast her more or else you're going to come out even more of an obddy than you were

when you went in. Also, I don't know if anyone listens to his pod has heard this as well, but do you remember that Ellie that just got chucked out? Yes. Did you see her, you know, you're not on TikTok,

but she said a TikTok, she's going to do a YouTube in the next couple days, apparently spilling all. She's like, I've watched it back. I'm so, so confused. She's like there was so many arguments. There's a huge divide with the girls,

a huge divide with the boys. It's been kicking off every single day. She cannot understand how and why none of it's been shown. Wow. And she says she's going to, she says it all makes sense. So she's going to spill the tea. But I thought they would have to sign like, what was it, NDAs and all that, what it was called?

I don't know. I'm at, you're an NDA. I'm actually wondering if they did do that and now they've undone it because I think actually. So many people are doing that on podcasts and things. Yeah. I actually think it's bringing more attention to Love Island, people spilling the tea. Yeah.

Whereas if, see if they weren't allowed to talk about it, none of these people would still be talking about Love Island. True. Do you know what I mean? And there's a lot of people spilling the tea about application process as well. People saying, this is my story about how I got approached for Love Island. They have to go through strenuous amounts of fucking forms, mental health checks, for them just to be dropped last minute because some people are saying they were too strong opinionated and producers wouldn't be able to work their magic with them. Weird theories, but yeah.

Anyway, excited to see how tonight's episode goes. Great, well, what's been on your plate? Well, let me fucking rant for a minute, shall we? I'm terrified. Yeah, you should be, because it was Valentine's Day, wasn't it? When was that? Yesterday.

What's that yesterday? Right, he heads up your arse. Oh, was that yesterday? That was last night. So anyway, it was Valentine's Day, and I had an email a week ago. I think I remember, I spoke about this in Seas in one. But Hello Fresh have asked to work with me numerous times, right? I used to love Hello

Fresh back in the day. I was a huge, huge fan of it. I'd have it every single week until and completely downhill. Anyway, they came, I stopped it and then they approached me to work with them. Good money as well. And I was like, I'm not going to work for a company that I think is shit, basically. So I was like, politely declined. And I said, this is my feedback. Wada, right, right, blah. They were really nice and said, really sorry to hear this. Anyway, I think they approached me again. And then last week, I got another email from a PR company saying, Jess, we'd love to gift you a Hello Fresh Valentine's Day box. Anyway, I read the menu and I was like, you know what, that sounds perfect. It was like crusted salmon. I can't remember it was like my Anne Richards ideal

dinner. Right. So I was like, it was just a gift. It wasn't a pay thing or anything. So you know what? I'm going to reply to someone says, listen, I'm going to be fully honest with you. Again, I don't have good experience with Hello Fresh, even though initially I used to love you, but I'll accept this as a gift with no obligation to post. And then she were like, we're more than happy, accept that. We're really sorry to hear that, and thank you so much for your honest feedback. And we really hope that this will change your mind. I was like, okay, at least that's Valentine's Day sorted.

Anyway, I fell ill, so ill. And I actually thought, thank fuck. I said yes, that Valentine's Day box, because I didn't have nothing planned. Richard was in the morning. He was like, I'll obviously go and cook out. I'll, obviously go and cook it. I'm like, don't worry, I've got that Valentine's day. a box arriving.

He was like, okay, well, I thought should have been here by now. Got to 6 o'clock. Did the fucking Hello Fresh arrive? No. So I emailed the woman and I was like, hi, whatever. I was like, where's my Hello Fresh box?

Please, if you have any track? Obviously I was a lot more nicer than that. I was like, where's my tracking? Have you got any tracking, sorry? She was like, I'm really, really sorry, blah, blah, blah. Never arrived. So hello fucking fresh. Can go and shove it up their own ass

because that was their last chance for me. And they've ruined it. Yeah, they really booped there. So anyway, that's why I was in M&S last night. I then went over there and then I got, as a pizza, I got one of those 450 calorie little pizza things actually, but I got, which had a big one, they were very nice. And the French fries, big bowl of salad, it was lovely.

Counteractive, the 450 calories. And, yeah, that's why I picked up the Portuguese tarts. But that was at like 7 o'clock. But my point was, you know how M&S do those nice three, what is it, like dine in for two for 20 quid? I went in, I think, earlier that morning to get, myself loads of fruit and stuff and I saw it all and it all looked really good and I thought oh you know it's a shame I'm getting that Hello Fresh because I could have got that

it looks all really nice went back from that night it was all gone everything left was the vegan stuff I actually heard loads say they were doing that this valentines really getting them in these deals yep so yeah I'm absolutely fuming yeah that's not good at all so you've also put off every listener we have of Hello Fresh so I think you know what some people have good um I think they've had their but I don't I don't rate them at all now at this point Yeah, so basically They've burnt their bridges with me And it's a shame because I was a huge fan back in the day

But yeah, I think that's just what annoying was I obviously was holding off for it for so long And then she emailed me this morning Was like, really, really sorry The Courier dropped it off to someone else's house On the way to yours, rubbish for a start Because how does that happen? How does that happen?

Yeah Is either your address or it is And then she said, I can still send it you For tomorrow, no thanks hon, pass So really that was an answer to what wasn't on your plate Yeah, so basically I've had nothing. Yeah.

But then... Starved. Was that also your emotional because... Yeah. We're quite upset. No, my emotional, so we've already covered, that is basically that I'm just constantly ill at the moment and I need answers. So if anyone's got any answers for me, tell me.

Okay, perfect. Do you want me to tell you what's on my plate because you're getting angry? Yeah, go on. Cheer me up. Okay. Well, I was at our beloved restaurant last night for Valentine's dinner. Don Costanzo. The best of the best.

It is so good. And you don't even need to get anything fancy. for it to be amazing, do you know what I mean? Yeah, what did you have? I had Arancini to start. What, ain't it, mushroom? Do you know me as a person? Oh shit, why did I just say that?

Yeah. Gee, actually rubbing his head out of frustration for me, I think, there. Not mushroom, no, because I would actually rather never eat again. I had, it just had, like, mozzarella in it, I think, I'm not really sure. And I had, like, a nice tomato sauce, and then I had the three-chreeze raviolis, I mean. Wow. And it comes with the tomato sauce on it. Delicious.

Jason had deep fried mozzarella to start. And it's like a big cube. Yeah. Stunning. And then he had the special meatballs. Delicious. He said it's best meatballs he'd ever had 10 out of 10. Yeah, they all very good actually.

Never had them in there, but he said it was just the sauce. Who was working? The usual ladies. Were they? They're just so lovely, aren't they? Yeah, they actually said, how do I recognise your face? And I was like, I'm friends with really, like, jelly and not? And then she was like, oh, you did the podcast with Jess.

and then she told me I had perfect high brows. Yes, nice compliment. And then Jason was like, ooh. Was it busy in there? It was getting really busy as we were leaving. We were there quite early because straight from work. But it was lovely vibes. And then on the way home,

nipped into B&M and we got some chocolate. What chocolate? Yeah, they actually like to discuss that as well. I've got a lot to say today. It was, you know, the Lotus Biscop? Is that the same thing? Yes. Anyway.

A bar, have you seen it? No. It's like a bar of chocolate? and it's just milk chocolate and inside it is like the Lotus Biscoff's bread and like crummy bits yum it was nice but too sicken but I don't know if I was just too full

so maybe I'll try again tonight delicious I would recommend to try it do you put your chocolate in the fridge or that not not? No I like my chocolate to be a bit moist I would say lovely what about you do you do you? Depends on the chocolate oh some stuff because in the fridge some something doesn't because I feel like if you had like a twix

If you put it in the fridge, that just fucks it. That's what I was going to say. I think if it's good... I could eat it either way. I would eat it even if it had shite on top of it. But I think if it's got like a filling, you're not putting that in the fridge. Because then... A cream egg doesn't go in the fridge.

No, because then it's hard. Yeah, that's correct. I think it would just need to be a solid bar or like one that's just got like wee bits in it that's not meant to be soft. Yeah. Anyway, that was what was on my plate physically. And then emotionally, maybe it's just how in love I was. Kid on. It's not that.

I'm like, wow. Getting deep. We're getting deep today. I actually think I would say that, I've been seen it. Never. Go on then. What's been on you and play it emotionally?

Well, I started a new role at my job today. Woo! Congratulations! That's all I really have to say about it, but new chapter, new challenges. Can you give us a little bit of information as to why it's different? More content,

a lot of people that maybe don't know the industry, more like photo-based. Cool. Like shoots. Creative. side of things yeah rather than just like general marketing yeah like brand management yep if that makes sense so that's me and your challenge accepted that's really exciting you have to move to a new different team of people um move to a different team within the team yeah if you know what I'm still

in marketing yeah but I've got a different manager and I'll be moving to seat really which I feel's quite a big thing where you're sitting I'll be sitting just a couple of banks of decks up love that with my new I'm trying to visualize you're moving my new closer college job I love that. Are you actually moving offices soon, like main offices? We're supposed to be getting a new office, yeah. Yeah. But not confirmed yet, but if we do, I think it'll be amazing. That's fabulous. You know what it's like. They like to have, like, amazing work spaces, which is obviously great for us. So that's my emotional what's on my plate. Quite a big

week. That is quite a big week. We asked a few of you listeners, what was a lot on your plate, and physically, we saw lots of you having some cost of coffees on us. That was really sweet, thanks for tagging us. That was cute of us, wasn't it? Yeah, what was it? So we just buy a voucher for cost of coffee and you just share it and then they have it until it runs out. You just get in the travel.

Somebody messaged me, bless them and they were like, oh, I've just had a coffee for £2.25 for my usual 3.30 and I was like, yeah, you must have had the last £1.15 on the voucher. Like that's a shame. A wee discount, can I beat it. And somebody did messages say that it declined for them, didn't they? But that was because they had it at a... In a hospital?

In a hospital, yeah. Which isn't class, is like a real costa. Is that right? I panicked and I was like, fuck, why is it not working? I met to friends on the train this morning and I got them to try it to make sure it was working again. And that was the Costa in Glasgow Central. So that's class is a real one for anyone in case we do it in the future.

Which went out now, so tough look. Is it capped here? Yeah. Yeah. You just buy it with an amount and then that's it. We treat for you all. Yeah, it's nice of us, wasn't it? By the way, I feel like last week I was resembling some sort of porn star

now life's come out of me fast. I resembled some sort of ogre. It's humbled me quick. If you don't mind me saying I don't know that you were ever resembling the porn star, I think Richard was wanting you to do that, but I don't, you didn't quite... The chat was a lot more spicy. It didn't quite succeed at that unless you're not telling us something. You know what?

You've got to be with us on our ups and down. absolutely it's part of the journey it's part of the experience we're all friends here anyway this actually relates a lot to what I've spoke about but I would like to know your answer some a lot of people were saying the M and S meal deals and someone would like to know would you eat something ready made like that or would you always have to cook from fresh so a ready meal to me so for example the pizza that I bought from M&S yesterday was ready made no banged it in the oven it was already cooked no that's not a ready meal So you mean something like you go, you pierce it with a cling film

when you love it in your microwave. Yep, exactly that. In all honesty, no, I wouldn't, I would not choose that. No. I'm not telling my nose about it, I just wouldn't. That screams heartburn to me. It screams class-counciled dinner to me. Yeah, maybe so, but then if I have that, then it would be,

I'm a big fan of, like, turkey drummers, beans and chips. Mm, I agree. Things like that. Smiley faces. But like a ready meal was in when it's like inner sleeve, nah, maybe not. but a wobbly were like ready vegetables from Eminus and the ready made mash maybe but like a lasagna no

I'm feeling like we're on different levels of what a ready meal like okay well talk to me what ready meal is Eminus is not a ready meal yeah oh but didn't she say Eminus no no we did but we're talking like farm foods Iceland yeah never

that's what I mean that's what I mean even the ones you're saying you would do that's like I would normally buy that that's high end I would buy vegas I'm calling that cancel

I'm calling you Eminet lasagna you're cancel that's like I've treated myself to a Saturday night and meal and you're saying

it's ready meal anyway there's your answer she's a snob and answers now no I'm just yeah okay fuck it

I'm a snob I would never eat a ready meal from farm foods to be fair I would actually be more concerned if you did

because with all that skill you have why would you exactly nah I would never wouldn't do that No. But you enjoying the chocolates?

Yeah. I need some comfort. No, but I mean if anyone does do that, it's fine. It's cheap as hell, aren't there, as well? Also just so quick, especially if you're just having dinner for one. I thought we're both getting rid of our microwave. What are we going to do there then? Well, I've not had a ready meal in months, but I would have one. I enjoyed them. Yeah, but you're not going to have a microwave soon, so you're never going to be able to enjoy them again.

Well, I've not fully committed to that. You're getting quite serious. Aggression's coming back. I'm like, I need to know. How are you going to eat your lasagna? we eat you lasagna. Right, well, I'll think about it and I'll go back to you night. Scream it out of the air friar. How many times you said the word air friar in 20 episodes after season two? Quite a lot. Could we just like casually just go airfire every now again?

It should be a buzzword for something. Also, did you see loads of folk got the air friar card this year for Valentine's Day? No. It was like love you as much as an air friar or something. I've seen loads of folk going on it. Yeah, it's really taking over the world. Emotional. So, somebody has wrote in emotionally, if this is good or bad thing, but they've finally moved in with their boyfriend. All we can say is, good look to you, her.

I think if you could have a very successful relationship, but living apart, a lot of people would do it. Well, actually, you probably can, but I mean, it doesn't feel the norm, you know? No, totally. I think that's why a lot of people that meet different partners as they get older. So let's say, for example, like our mums.

Yeah. And they do that at the start. I think they genuinely really love it because they've kind of got their life back again, and then they're sort of dating, feeling youthful. but they've still got their own space that they've always had. I think it is a great thing moving in together, but I think you need to be well aware

and don't panic when you have a rough patch because it's going to happen. It's going to happen. You're going to learn a lot of each other. And you're going to learn about a lot of each other fast as well. And you're going to be your boyfriend's mum from this point on. You say that though. Don't think about you because you're just a different type of person.

I mean, it depends though. There's different types of roles that we're. play. And I don't mean it Kinky. You're obsessed with an outfit. I'm not. I did keep saying to me though, where is that outfit? Why I've not put it on yet? And I'm like, that ain't going on my body mate. Imagine if I was been wearing it this week as well on Valentine's Day. I'd have walked in like a big corpse from a flipping bloter from the last of us walking in. Do you know, I've seen what they are, Sammy? You've not watched the last of us. It's the most hideous looking zombie you've ever seen. But anyway, no.

Do you stick it on? Who knows? Who knows? But you're still a stool set in my car. And you know what the funny thing is as well? I went to the tip. This is funny. This is funny. So I went to the tip yesterday. And I was chucking out so much stuff and I had a stall, like a four-leg stool. And it was on my passenger seat. And as I pulled it out of the seat, the strap of the chain was hooked on the bottom of the stool.

And I got out like, the guy in the yellow jacket. I was like, oopsie. Can you imagine that would have been absolutely mortifying? Well, what were we saying there before that? No, we were just talking about moving in with your boyfriend. So yeah, good luck. We hope it goes really well for you. All the best.

All the best. All the best. No, I actually think the main thing is don't panic when you get a rough patch. Yeah. Because I think... Can work through it. Yeah, absolutely.

Okay, so we're going to play a little quick fire game of this and that. You've got some for me, I've got some for you. Gee, you can give us one list on that as well. Right, I'm reading mine to you first. Go on then. Ready? No thinking about it.

Go on. See your future or change your past. See my future Wow Chips and gravy or chips and curry Gravy all the way Drive or be driven Oh my God

Drive Get car sick so bad if I'm in a passenger Same give or take Sorry Um It depends what you're talking about Gifts give Sexual sake

I'm obviously talking about oral sex Oh I mean You never know What about you? I'm asking you the questions. Fingers for toes or toes for fingers? Fingers for toes. Well, I mean, I feel like

I feel like my fingers are toes. So stick or twist. Oh, thick. Okay. Sauce on the side are all over. A side. Has psychopath behaviour? Depends the meal.

Yeah. Anyway, watch your mum and dad have sex every day or join in once. I fucking knew this was coming. I simply can't answer that question. I think that's more concerning. You should never be considered on joining in a shag of your mom and dad. Oh, watching them every day for the rest of my life. But would you ever want to join in?

No. You're going to have to watch your mom and dad shag for the rest of your life every day. I know I think that's terrific as well, but I'm never wanting to join in. No, never. I'm more up for watching than joining in. Or should just say I'm less up for joining in the watching.

You are right, it is own, it has to be that. Anyway, I'm asking you the questions, so all you need to is answer. Okay. Last one. Be chased by a horse-sized duck or ten duck-sized horses. Ten duck-sized horses. Wait.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're cute. Actually, yeah. Well, congratulations. You've done well. Okay. Why not that exciting? Okay. I'm ready. Maybe I should have added some of my own.

Help me with it. Have smelly breath every day of your life or have bad be-o. Bad B-O. Chilled or adventurous holidays? Chilled. Cinema or movie night? Cinema. Hair done or makeup done.

Make-up done. Fake tan, but you're always patchy and orange or have no tan and be pale forever. Patchy in orange. What? Have you seen the colour of my hands? Yeah, and I've already commented how ghostly you are. I would rather be patchy and orange.

I say it all the time. Never. I've always been a tanner. Always 13, my mum was giving me sun shimmer. Always. Never. Eat chocolate cake that tastes like poo or poo that tastes like chocolate cake. Chocolate cake that tastes like poo.

Yeah. I don't care what the taste is. I'm not eating poo. Yeah. Agree. Thank you. That's what I've got. Gee, I'm asking you,

never do CrossFit again in your life. or have to declare your love for Jenner on Valentine's Day every day for every day. Full disclaimer, I do love my wife. I know you do. You've got to be the biggest Valentine's Day fan ever. Okay, would you rather, when you're, let's say you're a single and you're texting a guy, right? Would you rather have 10 minutes dirty phone sex?

or send a full frontal nude. Phone sex. Can you imagine? No. I'd be like, wow, that sounds good. Never. You're not getting a nude from me. Never.

Because revenge porn. Agree. And also, it's just not for me. I don't actually think anyone's nude parts are attractive enough for a photo. I just don't. You could have the perfect vagina I've ever seen and I still think.

I never, ever send us dickpicks because they ain't cute. Nobody wants to see that. No one wants to see your dick. Nobody. Do you not remember in the days of Snapchat and you would actually open a Snapchat and he'd be somebody's will-y?

You'd be like, ooh! You'd throw your phone across the room like, yikes! Why? I don't understand who thought that was okay. No one. Anyway, that was a fun way yet. That was fun. I feel we needed to have a sort of chilled vibe compared to last week.

Well, it was that or nothing because you're lucky I'm here, honestly. That is true. I feel like we had to ease you in tonight. Yeah. And then also next week we've got our first guest of the season. We do. We do.

Exciting. It's all kicking off. Oh, I'm excited for that. Yes, everyone makes sure you turn back in here. She's mentioned a lot on this pod. She has. But we'll save that for next week. Yep.

Well, it was lovely to see you, Jess. It was lovely to see you too, Zoe. And I guess I'll see you next week. Yes, see you next Tuesday. Thanks for listening. Bye!