A Lot On Your Plate - S5 Ep22: Pilates Princess, Sticky Vicky & Hen Do Dramas

Episode Date: February 4, 2025

It's the final episode of season 5 (cries into earphones)!!! We can't thank you enough for all the love and support you continue to show us. We thought we would end the season with a bang and share some of your guys hen do dramas...dun dun dunnnn. From bossy MOH's & cheating brides to dirty mother in laws - we've heard it all. We hope you enjoy and we’ll see you soon💖 JS HEALTH: ALOYP15 (15% off site wide on one-off and subscription purchases)CLICK TO SHOP AMAZON STOREFRONT Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Happy Tuesday Pod Piggas yeah Yeha! It's the final episode of season 5 until we fuck off for good goodbye. See you forever just kidding. Season 5 is over today guys but we are continuing all the fun over on

Petrioni. Peperoni Petrione. Pepperoni. It always reminds me that. You say Petroni and you're going to miss you very much and we hope you enjoyed last week's episode with the girlies from I was going to say a lot I was going to see a lot on your herd

Get us over here Hope you enjoyed last week's episode with Girls Overhead It's had some lovely feedback They're so great We love them very much actually And yeah Some good advice Should have said

Blending We're blending It was a real blended studio set Um Love it But on today's episode We're going to have a little quick catch up

And then we are going to speak all about the hendu dramas it's hendu season people are booking up they're planning yeah still have nay hendos knee hendos nay hendotra nay hendos to go on you've not never i've got one this year um who's richard sister fine um and yes it's one of the this will probably be my proper first hendie where you know i'm there and i don't know anyone except my sister-in-law. Right. And obviously Haley.

But, yeah, so that's going to be interesting. But, yeah, we've asked you guys all of the dramas, the juice, basically, but also some good stuff as well. But, yeah, we wanted to hear the funny stuff. So we're going to dive into that. But let's kick out for the final episode with what's been a lot on your plate. I've done for a call, thank. Excellent.

Brilliant. Next. The only thing that I've got to speak about is I went to another one-to-one with cookie. Mm-hmm. Puppy training. Yep. Vimes. And all I've got to say about it is why she's so good with them but so shy with me.

Because it's a pro-sex. Not quite enough. I know. You're so impatient with these sorts of those are we. I know I am. And I'm really trying to be patient, but it's difficult. But the next one I go on My mum's going to come with me as well

So we're both like Doing the same thing Yeah, because you co-parents So you need both parents To be doing the same thing Which we are because we communicate Yeah But I think it would be good for my mum

To see how he does things Right So she can And I feel you can pick it up better if you're there Yeah Rather me relaying the information Do you know what I mean Yeah, totally

You probably miss half it out But that's what I've been up to At the weekend there I literally did virtually nothing Apart from go at my dad's for Burns night Oh yeah, that was very extra Zoe. Very extra. I can't believe it.

So we were on our group chat and I was sending in mince and tatties which we'll talk about in a minute. And then Zoe sent in this I don't know gourmet buffet. Yeah, it did look restaurant standard or I'll give her that, my stepmom.

But we do usually do a burns night every year and then there was a blipping system for a couple years, what never happened, right? I think it was maybe COVID, so it ruins everything. And I was about taking it back because I enjoy it or of haggis

as we know so anyway it was back on the radar this year maybe last well I can't remember so when and for

starter we had patty your faith see if you didn't you stop eating that would you ever because I wouldn't you love it don't

yeah like I would just keep eating patty and crackers all night or day and all night and then for main

we had haggis neaps and tatties and like the one we layered thing and she'd like pipe the potato on top.

Pipe the potato on top, fancy. Then we had homemade steak pie. Gorgeous. And a wee dish. And then we had black pudding bonbons. Wow. I would take haggis over black pudding any day, right? But it was to try and get, it was like all the Scottish things in the one dish.

And then it was a wee tiny gravy boat thing of peppercorn sauce. Delicious. And then... Not whiskey sauce? It was peppercorn. Okay. Maybe it should have a wee whiskey. It's Scottish theme.

For dessert, we had tablet ice cream. Who made? With a bit of tablet. Shut up. Did she make that? I'm not sure if she made it. No, I don't think she made it ice cream. She might have made a tablet though.

Bloody Nora. I know, it was gorgeous. Love tablet. Same. I love tablet and I love fudge, but I kind of forget that I love it. Like, I would never pick that up in a shop. Never, ever, ever. It's very sweet though, isn't it?

And it also gives you a massive crash when you have a bit, and you're like, can it all, a bit much. But that was really really. my weekend. Sunday I had the most Sunday Sunday of Sundays to ever exist so I woke up had like a slow morning on the couch, work up and then I

tidied the flat, hoovered all the usual shit and then I went to Pilates humbled just so everyone knows extremely humbled actually and then I went to all the shops I needed to get all my bits and bobs for the week then I came home and I made soup

no real, I know can you believe it and then I went and picked up cooking but at home and then I made dinner and then a chilled like it was productive but enjoyable yeah and you've starting to go to back to revolution because I told you that revolution's opened at East Coe Bride now which I think it's been open for a while I had no idea it's right near my house I don't know how I missed it it's obviously in the ether somewhere and I didn't get it you know the thing is with revolution spin right and revolution the whole group I think looks great, but when I go on their Instagram, that is, like, sensory overload for me.

Like, the Scottish GBX music that they play with the flashing lights, I think I would, I think I would have an attack. I wouldn't be going in there feeling Zen. I'd be going out feeling wired. Is it always like that? It's definitely not a Zen. We're not going for Zen. We're going for, like, pump it. Like, let's fucking pump it. You know what I mean? I just don't know how I feel about that GBX, you know? No, I'm not into that either, but I think the spin classes.

they quite often do themes so you can maybe pick what you go to I'm sure they do all that like can you versus Beyonce or shut my oh that would be quite fun but it was Pilates I went to and it's always the flashing colourful lights

I think it depends on who you've got I think they do always have the lights on that's kind of their thing Fair Fox I believe and they do actually put it on Pilates a wee bit as well

yeah because even the Pilates it's not like calm. It's like a hit version of place. I think I prefer that. The slower, calmer versions are a bit. I think I'm so aware of the time. Yeah.

Like it feels long. Whereas they feel quite short. It's just a bit over like a hit workout, isn't it? Yeah, but also, my God, I couldn't even. Yeah. I couldn't believe it. I thought, well, this is my thinking, right? I don't think I was going to find it easy whatsoever.

I don't mean that. But because I've been going to Richard, obviously, and I know that I'm lifting a lot heavier weights and doing a lot more intense things than it ever was surely I'm stronger than I've ever been right now but have you ever seen a football team try a Pilates class well exactly or a rugby team I know it's so different I know and to be fair

I probably don't do a huge amount on court I suppose but see even the bit when you put your arm in and you need to pull like your whole weight basically with your arm I thought I was like this a fucking piece of piss I'm strong right I couldn't move it And then she was like, if you feel like you can do it, stand up whilst doing it. I thought, fucking no chanting. I'll stay right where I am.

Not a lot of people stood up, no thank you thought. Because see, you thought I'd have to go. And I am that person that's like, I don't want to look shite in here. Yeah. And I think I was saying to Jason, like, why it's here what people think. It's not what they think is what I think. Yeah. Like, I don't want to feel shite in here.

And yeah, I'm going to go back in a couple of days. I'm going to keep going. Yeah, you should. Yeah, you should. And also it really made me really. realize the benefits you could get from that. God, it's such deep core muscle strength as well. And I think when you've not done it in so long,

you realize again all over, like, see when you are pulling it from your arm, it's like the root of your arm you're pulling. It's not like the loose muscle at the top, do you know what I mean? It just works up them all. Fuck me. I know I'm definitely going to get into Pilates when I've pushed this baby out

because I think it's going to be really good to help rebuild core strength from pelvis and stuff like that. That's probably quite a good exercise. Like I would imagine they would. recommend that. Yeah, I think they do, you know. Yeah. Yeah, I think they do.

But we're actually going to have a really good Patreon episode when we're gone all about wellness girl, the it girl era, where we're going to discuss all of our favorite things to do on the perfect GWR day, weather day. It was GWR weather the day. It was. I was going to text you this morning like, look at the weather today. I went into the dentist, which is in the West End, and I was blinded by the sun to get my next retainers. eight sets I've got now for the next

eight weeks. I'm sorted. Wow. I'll see you've got the Christmas present in that I've bought you. Oh my wee bobble. Got your earrings in as well. I do. Wow, appreciative. I think you should tell people where your jumpers from

and your earrings then. In fact, no, I will tell you where my jumper's from because it's no A-Sos. Can you believe it? It's Zara. Zara, jumper, jeans at all was where earrings are Nima Rowe. Is that how you say it?

And if you'd see my class I don't know if you can that's Nima Rowe Jess got me the earrings and the bobble thing for my Christmas. Love it, though. Anyway, that's really all I've been doing

to be honest I'm quite a homebird in the month of January. I enjoy it. I wonder if a lot of people are going to have a nice beverage on the 1st of Feb? I was going to go out

in the 1st of Feb, but I think we're going the week after now. Glasgow? I've got a sneeze coming. Oh, it hurts. They used to hate that when you were a kid, if you used to hate that when you were a kid, if you used to ruin your sneeze.

Just go, blah-la-l-l-l-b. Anyway, what's been a lot on your plate? I've got fuck all the else to say. Not a lot. Nursery started. House had shit-tip. And I give birth in less than three weeks. Yay. Growth scamp, paro. That's quite a lot on your play, I would say. Growth scan tomorrow. Shark horror.

She went there and she's like, oh, your bump is measuring 42. weeks um so yeah i've got a scan tomorrow but should be fine i'm not going to overthink it like your bump's 42 weeks right now yeah on the tape measure they literally put it like that yeah and she's like oh 42 i'm like oh that seems accurate look off honestly i just it not all depend on like what size yarn all that though i don't know it's it's so dated anyway and everyone tells me just take it with a pinch of salt and i have done because last time remember i was in a right state last time i went to her and she told us on a growth scan i went for a great overscan and she thought like, yeah, it's a big baby, but you're still measuring in the normal.

Why haven't it gone through it all again? No, because she was just like, no, I really think you've got a big baby in there. Also, she was, she was feeling where the position was. And she actually, the baby's head, I don't know if you see this on the camera guys, it's down there. And she actually put her fingers between it and she was like, hmm, holding it like that. And then it went, boof. Purebooted me, obviously.

Here, fuck. I know. And she was like, oh, go on. I was like, how do you feel that? Because I was like, are you sure that's the head down there? Yeah. She was like, I am certain because she can, then she listens to the heartbeat, which was here. And then she's like, go on, feel it.

And I couldn't actually reach around. But then I said to her, I think it's a girl. I said, I'm almost like certain in my gut feeling that I'm having a girl. And she went, I'm going to tell you now. She went, I have absolutely no idea, no, there's no, behind it, there's nothing, I've just got this feeling that you are having a girl. And I was like, okay, well that's that then. I think it's a girl.

I thought no, my main changes have to do. It is a girl, guys. But I still believe I'm a boy mom. That's why I've still got this boy in my head. But I know, I'm going to eat my words, I know that's a girl in there. Do something with you of a girl? Silence. Let me tell you now, if I announce it's a boy, I want you to picture this, I'm on that hospital bed, I've just pushed it out of my fanny, and I will have fell off the bed in shock. That is going to be me. I will be flawed of shock if they say it's actually a tinky winky bed down there.

It'll be Richard that will say it, won't it? unless he's in the floor as well I didn't imagine if I actually did fall up and the baby still look attached what a disaster that would happen to me anyway so we went and worked in town

didn't we last week and we went down Buchanan Street and we saw mangoes opening on Buchanan Street and I just know they're going to make that a good one yeah because there's good ones

and they're shite ones and all the ones we've got are actually shite yeah the one at the fort we've said this before it's shit the one in the four and the one

Galen Galleries is not that bad, but the layout of the shops just, ugh. Nobody goes up there. I hate it. So I think that's a great move for them. Mango's coming. What else did we see? We saw that food shop. Oh yeah, it's called Foodies.

There's a nice Scottish food produce shop in Canaan Galleries. By the way, Buchan Galleries has got some nice shops in it, you know. I was walking through it a couple of times, and I thought, you know what, it's not actually that bad in here. No, it's not. But I think that's all getting knocked down. Oh. Made student flats? say same as cinty next

yeah foodies it's called looks quite good nice wee cookbooks and that in the window there and you know where I'm going on Thursday actually what day is it today Tuesday so on Thursday you know Shucks in the West End

did you ever get to go to Shucks no it was shame because it was actually really really lovely but they've changed they've closed and it's being called the Clarence and it's the same owners as Kale Brook and Brett

Oh yeah And we're going to their opening night on Thursday Lovely And that will probably be my final date night Took Richard DeSbs Because he wanted to go He loved it But anyway

As I was saying Me and you went down Bacan Galleries Sorry, Becanon Street Because we went to Clubhouse finally For some food And Prince of Princess Square And talking of mints and tatties

The menu is just iconic isn't it It's like... That's just my perfect menu, honestly. Yeah. We eat a sandwich with monster munch in it. I said to the waiter, can we clarify what this means? It was like cheese and pickle with monster much. I was like, is that as in like the crisp?

And he was like, yeah, crushed up monster munch. It was so good. I was like salivating at the thought. It was so bloody good. And we get haggis bonbons to start whilst we were deciding what to get. Of course. Can I beat them. So then we shared the sandwich.

We shared mince and tatties. You'd never had them before. With dumplings. and I know it's so basic for you guys and it is just basically a deconstructed cottage pie but with slash stew but I know that that was a really good mince and tatties. No I can confirm it was

because it tasted so fucking rich and good and the mash was good the dumpling was perfect I'm actually dribbling as I'm seeing it what I used to do at my grands every Tuesday was mix my mince and tatties all up Like, you know, people say it looks like a dog's dinner, I'm into that, and then put some of ketchup all over it, and there'd be carrots in it as well. Yeah, well, there was carrots in that one.

Yeah, parsley on top. I put a bit of ketchup through it. Brown sauce, I would have loved that, but the heartburn said no. And then when I put it on my story, quite a lot of people were like, you need white pudding with that. What's white pudding? It's a different blood cell of black pudding, I'm sure. Yeah?

That made me feel funny. I think it might be Irish. Maybe I've made that up. I'm sure white pudding's like an Irish thing. I've never heard of that my whole entire life. But anyway, the menu at Clubhouse, and it's so nice in there. You can sit outside and have a look at the beautiful Bucan galleries, but you can also sit at the back.

Loads of screens of sport. So if you want to go somewhere with your boyfriend, or if you're a guy listening to this, by the way, and you're really into your football or your rugby, or a woman. Great place to go with the lads for the weekend for pre-drinks, watch the sport, and just nice vibes, nice good food. I just think I can guarantee couples go out a lot on the weekend to go in and do some shopping

and get some lunch on the guys think the whole time which is a good game on I'd like to be watching. Yeah. That does the job because you can get a cocky whilst you're in there. Really good cocky as well. Good food. It's a nice venue, nice atmosphere. You're not like in a shouty pub.

Yeah. Love it. I'll be back for the food, absolutely. Rich texts me because he saw we were in there and he was like, oh, he sees, you know, open goal. So I'm ferrying that. He said they record some. podcast in there and he's like I always wanted to try it so anyway the next day I was like

he's like let's go into town for some breakfast I thought where can we go I remember that they do a real full Scottish breakfast they do I was like I want to go and get that he was like well let's just go then I was like well you can tick that off how was it so fucking good it looked good that was a full plate did I send you a picture I did didn't I yeah and I was like where the fuck are and you were like at clubhouse I was oh did I just leave you there last orange juice, had coffee with a tablet on the side. Wow. He had the exact same as me.

Just a proper full Scottish breakfast. Really, really good. Love it. Can't recommend enough, to be fair. I just think it's popping off from Prince Square. Yes. There's so many options and you can pop out space NK. It's confirmed.

It's official. It's expanding. We saw it. We saw the sign. It says it there in black and white. The old essence of Harris shop. It needs to be bigger. I'm happy about this.

Yeah, same. It needs to expand It's like a showbox in there And then we need anthropology Ratt round next to it And we're sweet Nothing's messing I don't think anymore

No Nope But once But anyway After we had breakfast I was like What do you want to do Blah

We'll have a little mooch around town He's like I really want to go to get some What does he want Magnesium Glacet or something Yeah it's called something Something like that He wanted some sort of supplement

That you see in everywhere And he's like Holland and Barrett do it blah blah And I was like, I'm sure I have loads of that in my cupboard. I was like, there's loads of supplements that have, you know me. And anyway, so we went into Holland and Barrett. I went home and I looked at my cupboard. I didn't have it, but what I did have was magnesium.

I remember when I used to speak about this on the podcast at the time. I used to take magnesium supplements every single night when I was doing a lot of training for the half marathon and just high rock stuff in general because it really helped my restless legs. But then when I started taking my prenatal supplements, I was really conscious of like overtaking loads so I just kind of stepped back and just took the one all in one multi because it had it in it anyway restless legs have been

through the freaking roof right and I think I might mention this before what the fuck can you even do that because it's honestly so annoying well I'm gonna tell you so here we go guys strap on her magnesium bath salts is another amazing one the only way I could do you remember when I text you or did I tell you that next morning I was like I was actually having a bath at two in the morning because I woke up in there's that much agony I need to go and do something so anyway I was raiding through my cup and I was like what the fuck I've got magnesium powder and you know how I have my heartburn smoothie every morning I thought I'm going to start whacking in a couple of scoops of this

and it was JS Health advanced magnesium raspberry and lemonade I think the flavor is powder form of the tablets that I used to take and I remember when I was working with them they sent me the tablets but they said to me we've got a new formulation of a powder and a member of that community yeah and they were like a But you should try it. Anyway, never opened it because... You're used to taking this point. So I was starting using that for about two weeks now.

And I have not had rest of leg since. Hand on freaking heart, Zoe. I must go on to that because that's the worst feeling in the world. It's cause you're overtired. Well, that's when you get it normally. Yeah. And non-pregnant life. And you know what it makes my smoothie taste like?

Bimpto. I love Fempto. I know. I thought you would like that. So... Fempto bonbons are the best. So anyway, I messaged them. And I was like, right.

Well, I freaking love this. I says, I loved telling the pod pigs about new recommendations. Yeah, absolutely. Can you give me a code? And the code is a lot on your plate, I think, or a lot, A-L-O-Y-P. And you get some nice discount off anything off J-S-Health. So check it out. I've spoke about J-S-Health loads on my Instagram.

It's a really, really, really good supplements. But I personally can't recommend to you enough the new magnesium. It's in like a navy and white pot. And it's pink, and I think it's raspberry lemonade. Tastes like Vimtoe, so good in my smoothie. Just two little scoops. And my restless legs are no more. So get on board with that, Zos.

In fact, you actually really like using some of their supplements. I like the hair and energy ones for a while. Yeah. I just ran out and, you know me, don't get them back. Yeah. And people love the detox and de-blot. Yeah. I took that for quite a long time, actually.

Really good. I think you just need to be on it, like, the right timings with that one. The hair and energy one, is really popular and they do a good eye in one as well anyway right should we get into the topic

yeah why not why fricking not hensu dramas laughs gossip and you name it you fricking name it

coming from us to that haven't been hens before me and Zoe are nice and organised with our shared note thanks for the tip on that girl's over heard. We're now on it like a cow

Barrett. It's actually very helpful. It's more helpful the fact that you did it. But we can take it off as we go.

I love that. It's a checklist. Or we can just tick it. We can just delete it. So, we ask on our stories give us all the goss.

Go for it, Zoe. Oh, here we go on first right. This is a disaster waiting to happen but one of my friends is going in a hendoo with about 20 other

girls and it's all small friendship groups that don't really know each other. Between them, guess how many bedrooms are in the Airbnb? There is three in total. What? For over 20 people.

The maid of honour booked it before asking anyone. Glad it's not also one of my friends as it sounds like Helen I'd be checking into a hotel from personal space. That's my worst nightmare. That's like seven people to a room. How the fuck is that going to work? Top and tail. No. I just think in this day and age as an adult, like you don't want to be doing sharing at all.

So is what she's saying is she didn't expect everyone to say yes Nobody had the choice She's saying the maid of honour just booked it before asking anyone What But surely the bride's not going to be happy with that No She's getting sacked People have got absolutely no self-awareness

My oldest sister's hen was a disaster Her friends really pushed us to get a stripper And said it wasn't a hen without one Me and my other sister Who were her bridesmaids pushed back And said we really didn't think because she was the type. But they went ahead and booked it anyway.

On the day with each layer of clothes that came off, I could see my sister was not comfortable and not laughing to the point she told us to make it stop. Oh my God. Obviously me and my sister are absolutely devastated that we let this go ahead, knowing our sister wouldn't like it. So it ended up crying in the toilets. Oh, no. Our auntie decided that was the perfect opportunity to come and try and make amends with us

about previous family drama. Well, obviously she's crying in the toilet. To put into perspective here, the auntie spoke to the oldest sister, but not the other sister. It was so ridiculous that the auntie was uninvited from the wedding. None of us speak to her now, and we can finally laugh at the situation. Why do people, oh, I don't know, I was going to say why people get so offended at a strapper, but would I enjoy that, no. You know, I still reading that out, I was thinking, this is like you, but I don't think you would be like, make it stop. I just think you would be stiff as a board like, ugh.

Yeah, I just, I don't, I'm not the type to like get involved. Yeah. You know, like people really embrace it. Like you would probably touch them and all that. No, but what you've got to remember is, if I had a hendo, who's in that room watching is a lot of family members from the person you're about to marry. I know.

Potentially. So no, I would not be like groping someone's crotch whilst Richard's mother is sat there. Well, I also don't really enjoy, I don't really enjoy being the viewer of the situation either. Yeah, because it's just like, it's a bit awkward. Like, it does make you want to curl up and die. I don't know about the stripper, I think I would much rather a lot of other things. Why is that?

Why, when you have these hendos, yeah, why is it all about a penis? Is it not because... Is it not because... Is it not because... What I'm about to say is even worse, actually, with what you've just... said what I was going to say is is it not because back in the day in the olden days it was very much like until

you were married you could kind of do what you wanted kind of are you a virgin basically so you're signing up for the Duke yeah but also maybe moving on from that a wee bit it was like you would get everything out your system

before the wedding day I don't know if it was seen as I don't know bad then I don't know maybe for the woman it was Maybe for the man, not so much. But then that's what I mean. But then why is the guy is not about the vagina?

Because then is that because you're just always going to do what they fucking want? Anyway, probably. We have said this before like the sashes at Hindus and things like my last rodeo in that shop

but like things a man doesn't wear stuff like that in fact the man has nothing to do with you on him sometimes they have your face. I don't mind a Willie Straw I bet you don't you dirty bitch I don't mind that at all

I think that's a wee bit of banner fling that in there. It's not like, I don't want like a big detailed willy hanging from the ceiling. Yeah. I'm not offended by them either. I know a lot of people are like it's tacky or what I don't love and I think we've said this before is the sailor hats. I just don't know why that's getting anything to do with a hen do. Same. Interesting. I think you need to be a bit attack on these things. It's part of what you sign up for. For sure. Went on a hent ten or years back and it was fucking wild.

Should to have known it be chaos when we all got leathered on the flight out and were swapping seats and numbers with guys on a stag do. Fagely recalled doing shots of whiskey on a guy's lap. Legit can't remember getting off the plane. Quiet as a mouse girl was caught doing gear in the Did you want to be scared?

Can I say that? Yeah, of course you can. Quiet as a mouse girl was caught doing gear in the toilets. Someone slept with someone on the beach. Someone with someone in the club toilets someone lost her bag and phone a couple of girls returned to the hotel at 9 a.m after being a random house party

there were strip teasies received and given it was absolute utter carnage one of the best weekends of my life none of the antics ever were spoken about again to protect relationships and dignities and everyone I adhere to what happens in Tenerife stays in Tenerife

sounds like my carah handy love it that's just what you need to do see if you get single I mean I was going to see if you get single pals. The fact that she said protect relationships hasn't given single pals. But if you've got single pals, fucking

get them out there. It's giving the hangover. I like it. Night one of four abroad for my besties hen playing a pre-scripted drink if instead of never have I ever because it felt safer with the adults that were there with us. And the bride didn't expect and the bride didn't want to expose herself

too much to her mom. It turns out it wasn't her mom. We were to be worried about the mother of the groom was so drunk by the final round that she skipped the whole drink if part and off script blurted out that she had in fact come three times in one night and clearly wanted the bagging rights for it to which the whole room was silenced and she very swiftly took herself to bed leaving her gin goblet and phone behind it was never spoken about again for the rest of the holiday but none of us have been able to look at it in the same way since laces oh my god imagine that

I think in those situations, like the mums of the people getting married are like still wanting to be youthful so they want to... Yeah. Like still, they don't want to be seen as the mum there. Yeah. Like they want to be involved so they take it too far. Gin Goblet, nothing describes a mum like that. Gin Goblet. Gin Goblet.

Lesser. Right. Husband and I had a hag-do. Hen and stag. Is that not called a stene? yeah anyway away for a weekend with pals

in this mansion Airbnb and Trunlo was so fun and so silly Trunlo was so fun and so silly but on the day we checked out the host put in a claim through Airbnb for £2,000

because we scratched the hard wood floors and they said they had to replace entire floors in the whole house sure you did we argued with them for weeks with them getting all coats

for the work etc ended up not having to pay for it but the friend who booked the house now has our Airbnb account blocked and can't book anymore because of the bad review found out that the host tried to do the same to another group too just buy a new floor if you want one hon

so they're at it Cowboy Airbnbs I imagine you just paid that though and that won't be cheap too grand they were quoted and what they think is they like prey on hen and stag do is where you get so pissed and they don't know what's happened

yeah I know be careful out there folks Clever, but also snakes. So I went to Aaron for mine. Hang in there, it gets more exciting. The restaurant we went to wouldn't let a hen party dine, so we got all split up. Some wanted to eat, others didn't.

A few of us ended up in like a rugby club after a random signers in. If you know, you know. I don't know. Do you know? I don't know what that means. I don't. Anyway, if you know, you know.

My cousin was trying to lift one of the rugby players up, dropped him and he fell. through a table so we got papped out of there, ended up bumping into another random who showed us a shortcut to the nightclub, which was actually just a house converted. The shortcut was through a field, so we were up to our shins in mud

and had to wash our feet by flushing them down the toilet. I ended up dancing about wearing the chef's shoes from the restaurant. We weren't allowed in. I'm a size four. He was a size 10, so they were like clown shoes. Everyone in the club knew it was my,

hendoo and I ended up crowd surfing about the dance floor the ferry home was fearful lots of people from the night out icing on the cake was my cousin had a worky in her house a few days later long story short he had family and Aaron and apparently we were the talk of the island five years later and I've still not been able to watch any of the videos back that's what you want talking to islands small Scottish island so I was studying in Madrid at the time my moor who's our heat. Invited me to her pals Hendon Benadorn, which I was buzzing for because they're a good laugh. I was 22 at the time my first boyfriend had just

broke up with me the week before because we were doing long distance. Blessing in the sky's enemy. So I get a six-hour coach to Benadour but was still on that nonsense heartbreak diet, skinniest I've ever been as I'm a grubber and capital letters. And my maus pals are already on stage with the Lionel Richie Tribute Act. I must have drank seven cocktails and smoked five fags within the hour on an empty stomach, so no wonder the events

unfolded when that's paired with a squad of Ayrshire women who drink like fish. I ended up drinking straight until the Sunday morning, highlights from the mob bender wear, stealing electric buggies and crashed it into a bucking bronco. One of the old aunties trying to send me to my bed because I was out of the game

but she sent me to my room in the hotel lift, turns out I passed out in the lift and was found an hour later by other lasses on the hendoo. The bride to be handing me a can of dragon soup and said we're heading to the beach at 9am but hey at least i got to see elvis presley and michael jackson perform on the one night canny beat benedorm have you ever been to benedorm zoe no have you ever heard of sticky vicky yeah and she's still around no but her daughter does it now shut up yeah have we said

this before um i don't know but her daughter does do it in her place now which i think's even fucking weirder do you know what i mean like imagine that going to watch your mom was showing then You're looking at her like, I want no spire to be like my mother pulling a banana out of a vagina. I know. And then the mum, like, because a lot of people do jobs, but they wouldn't want their children to do it. Or do things or have done things, but wouldn't want it to pass on their children. Do you know what I mean? I wonder what she's called.

Sticky Mackey. Sticky Vicky Jr. Right. Where do I even start? The maid of Bono organized a surprise stripper who looked fit and young in his picks and who was coming as a police officer who called himself the Italian stallion to arrest the bride

we were all very enthusiastic despite being crowd-surfed on by a naked pot-bellied old man we still cheered him on though things turned sour when the mother-in-law had enough of being molested and spilt her drink on him the anger that unleashed from this man

was nothing like we have ever seen before his aggression caused him to throw a drink in my mother-in-law's face we didn't know if it was part of his act or not he demanded we left so we could get dressed and told us we were the worst group he had ever had we didn't know the level of service he was going to provide but let's just say there were dildos being thrown about that he used as props whilst doing some digging on this man we found out he has been on the sex offenders register oh my goodness he has more than

20 kids as he is a sperm donor he's been on this morning talking about it safe to say we will never ever forget this experience and it's become a law in our friendship group this man lives rent free in our heads sorry I have now been informed that it's actually over 30 kids now that he has what the fuck you thought you were getting an Italian stallion

and you got wee Jimmy for doing the road to see what this man looks like they sent a picture of him I'm sure did they I'm sure they did I remember seeing a picture of someone shaking a woman of a naked man yeah Okay, here's some shorter ones now

Let's roll them out Being on a hindo where the maid of honour fell out with the bride and physically had a fight And also on the same hendoo as the fight The bride to be cheated on her husband Obviously this needs to be anonymous I am so shirk about this Is this a thing? Surely people don't cheat on their hens and stags

They do They do, they do, they do have heard it many times Do you think it's like an impulse Like I'm never going to get to do this again Maybe or you just get so rat-assed. You actually have to think about some of these men right, I'm not making any excuses by the way here

but they are so set up by their mates. I know by the way. And they get themselves in some state that they probably have no idea what's going on. I'm not funny at all about like Jason going out, drinking whatever

like we're both very children at the department. Yeah. However you're just saying that no wonder girls are a wreck when their guys are in their strategies. I know. Because it's the pal's fault. Yeah, they do egg it on, don't they a bit?

And a lot of pals, I think... Ship clubs as well. Yeah, and I don't think they necessarily think of the bride in the situation. But you might have the odd one that's like, you're maybe good pals with or whatever, who would be thinking of you, but the rest of them don't give a fuck.

And you have to think, when you're at that age where you're getting married, it's probably so rare that you're getting all your boys back together at this age. You're all in your, like, I mean, I'm stereotyping here, but let's say you're only like your 30s. You've got all the lads together. You've finally got away from your family for the weekends.

I know. You're going apes yet. Yeah. Sorry to put the fear of God into anyone's man going on a stag to this year. But I'm just going to think it. I think we do stins. Stends. I think that would be actually really fun.

I think if your group's align. Yeah. And like if there was some that fancy each other or... There could be a bit of juice going on. I reckon it'd be really fun if you were married to, like, all the women went with all the men. Yeah. But that's when it gets hard and folk break up and all that nonsense.

Oh, there's a few of these. I would love to know more of these as well actually, and I'd like to see picture evidence. But Brisemaid fell off, an e-scooter in roads snapped half of her front tooth and broke her arm. Ben, you would have a fucking stuckey on for your wedding Nah, you'd need to cancel it The hen took something dodgy in Ibiza Fell down the boat, stairs Face injury a week before her wedding

No Also, I was thinking about this Imagine how many injuries that you get from the stag For your husband to be Imagine him walking down the aisle with a big black eye I'd give him another Yeah, I just wouldn't be having it We wouldn't be getting married

Guys please send in any picture evidence of this. There's got to be load. Also, there must be disasters as well. From the day you're getting your makeup done do you spill something on your dress before you go out or is somebody accidentally spilt something on you before you walk down the aisle

you've tripped on your dress on it literally the very last moment that there's none of that's possible. And it's happened. You'd be fuming. Walk down in your little lacy underwear instead. Was asked for receipts of where the money

was going when I was planning a hendoo. Oh. This is another thing. With hendos I think it's the drama of the planning because you're in a group of so many different people and you've got people with different financial situations which is honestly fair enough I know that some of them can be

extremely excessive but it's almost like people don't trust that what you're saying is the case. Yeah exactly. So you feel a bit like fucking out, I'm I really going to mug you off but then again you do hear horror stories of people taking money from things. How can anyone do that without guilt though I don't get it

the next one's quite a good one to go into actually then three days abroad and home hen costing 2.3k so far so far look back by the way and the home this is the other thing people do a broad hens but then because not everyone's able to

attend to do a fucking home one and all I've got a friend who has been to many hendos last year and she was just saying like it's actually skinned in her. And some of the friends that she had were having that, like that. It was just too much. And she was like made of honour for quite a few of them as well.

I think it's unfortunate when you're kind of part of them and a lot in fall in the one year because maybe one of your holidays in the year or whatever or a weekend to having to be devoted to that, fine. See, when you're on number three or four and all your money's having to go towards that. Yeah. I would hate if that happened.

And if they worked corporate and they only had the holiday entire amount of... Yeah, so all your hog is going towards, like, your pal's hinders. And none to go away with your man or... And also a lot of people wouldn't necessarily pay the favour, really. No. Like, people are very... I want everyone to come to mind, but you don't know if they'll come to yours.

Anyhow? Friend on my hand got locked in the guy's apartment in the morning. We were meant to be coming home dead. Shit. Missed your flight. I hope she was in the way someday. Oh, my God. My friend is now married to the same guy who was the best man at her first wedding.

So basically she married her ex's best mate. Fairfax. Marry and Jerry. No, that is bad. I would like to know more on that story. You can't. Loves love though, isn't it? Loves love.

That's giving love actually at the door. Yeah. There's boundaries in this life though Yeah Sometimes morals need to come before love You know But then sometimes you just can't help yourself Maybe it's the brother

Maybe Or the da My goodness Sometimes brothers or dais are the best man Right two more Seven themed outfits for a four day hen Is this a bit much? Please say yes fucking four themed outfits for a four day hen would be too much

that is beyond excessive by the way and if you're listening to this and you've got a hen do and you're planning seven themed outfits have a word check yourself check yourself it's then the pressure of having to buy all these new things to fit

a specific thing find them for a start secondly if people don't have a lot of money to go on this hen right but are managing to go they're then having to buy a full new wardrobe whereas maybe they could have made do with previous holiday clothes it's just like a full extra cost that's going to be like an old white party isn't it

and then pastel day pastel day Jesus fuck then we'll maybe all have like glitter disco some people I do like when people do like all their old jobs that's brilliant

I think all the people on it dressed up as each of their jobs that they had so one was like McDonald's one was like Gregsy or whatever so they all did that you'd boom McDonald's at Ocean Club ha ha ha ha ha ha ha see I think

doing for I think making the bride do funny things is good yeah but I don't think fucking 20 folk in a hen you need being different outfits every day no I would quite frankly hate

to be told to do that but I don't mind at a couple of themes ones. I think a white part is brilliant and then glitter box or something but then seven for a four day hendo that's what's excessive. I know and even if you do maybe like

a white day or a pink day or whatever the chances are you've maybe got something if you're not able to buy something or you can make it work also provide me like if it's t-shirts with her face on you provide me with that stuff provide me but it'll go and

a wee foldy up in my bag I'm nowhere in it yeah That'll be my jammy top Love that Let's round it off, shall we I'm going to let you do this, eh? No Yes

The word C, I will actually about to come out in my mouth Shut up, we're ending the season Right, okay, here we go, you ready Look at the camera, like your mother tells you to do She's waving, she's waving Well, end of season five Thanks for all your love and support always enough? Enthesiousious enough? It's not enough. It's not enough.

What do you want for me? I said thank you. Thank you for all your love and continued support always, moa. That's nice. Seriously, thank you for all your love and continued support. We really hope that you continue on with us over on Patreon over the next few weeks. And Zoe's going to have a few lovely guests in my absence. I will 100% be keeping you up to date on there of a few bits and bobs if I can have the physical energy to do so I'm sure I will. I'm sure I will. But yes, we really hope you've enjoyed this season. We don't know when we'll be back but the main, usually we would have taken a break after

Christmas so we've stuck with you for now and we usually come back around Valentine's don't we? But that is when the baby's due. We're kind of aiming for April so fingers crossed that we're able to. to do that. But if not as Jess said I'll be on Patreon anyway myself well it won't actually be myself I'll have. Me to half of it. I'm thinking I'm going to

call it Zoe and Friends thoughts. Love that. I don't know who my friends are. We'll find you some. But we'll find some. Yeah. And thank you so much to our lovely up next studio guys. Yay! Yay! You're the best ever and we will be back here with them. We'd like to threaten them every single week that we're

never coming back, but we absolutely are. and also please stay with us on socials because we'll still be posting clips and maybe a few question boxes on what you want to see for season sex I think we should call it season sex

oh right let's do it SEX even though I'm definitely banning myself from sex no more children and no we also have one little question to ask you guys what we need an assistant

We need somebody to help myself and Zoe out with a few bits and bobs for the podcast now that it gets busy But if you are a fan of a lot on your plate and you have experience in editing in social clips we're talking here If you're experienced in knowing the trends Social media sort of background I don't really know what I'm asking for here really because social media slash marketing backgrounds yeah when we need somebody to go and listen to all of our episodes

and do us some really cool clips help us with just managing the podcast really in terms of like topics and managing the inboxes there's a lot it's a lot a lot a lot that goes on behind the scenes in the podcast which there's a lot of ad many sort of sides and it's hard when I can only listen to myself talk

like once a week yeah and we've got to that point now where we don't always want to have to listen back we are more comfortable and freeing in what we say but sometimes having somebody listen to it with fresh ears they're like oh that was a really good clip or that was a really good thing that you should focus on a bit more and it's hard for us because we're just quite self-critical sometimes I think

so having that sometimes you're just too close to something you need a fresh eye's yeah so if you know of someone or you feel like you're the perfect candidate please drop us a DM and we will potentially meet with you and go from there really but yeah we don't really that this is very unofficial right now but we need some we need we've had a discussion and we need some extra support for the next season

because we want it to be the we want it to grow and get bigger and better absolutely okay for that to happen there needs to be a team yes the team needs to go how exciting and we're nice to work with so I am anyway unsure on this one I'm perfectionist I'll put that out there in case it ruins your ideas anyone. Okay, well, thanks so much. We love you and we'll see you next season. Bye, guys. Wish me luck.