A Lot On Your Plate - S6 Ep14: Dating Apps, Ring Shopping & A Special Guest

Episode Date: July 29, 2025

This week, Jess is joined by Richard while Zoe's off on holiday! We're chatting all things life lately, what’s been a lot on our plates, and diving into some listener dilemmas - from not knowing what to do with your life to engagement ring pressure, flaky dating app behaviour, and our advice for new parents. Plus, we’re celebrating 3 years of A Lot On Your Plate 🎉 A massive thank you to all our lovely listeners for joining us on this journey, we love you!Stay tuned for more from Richard later this week on Side Dish! You can sign up to Patreon for an extra episode every week plus bonus vlog style content, competitions, group chat, early access to tickets and looooads more! See you there piggies 💖 patreon.com/ALotOnYourPlate Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Time to check on the skies. It's another sunny day in Calgary. Forecast calls for high levels of economic activity. Late afternoon, we've got a burst of potential in a place ranked North America's most livable city. Tomorrow, blue sky thinking in the blue sky city should hold steady. And the outlook remains optimistic throughout the week. So come grab your dreams and enjoy watching them take hold. It's possible in Calgary, the blue sky city.

For the full economic forecast, visit calgary economic development.com. We are so excited to have Watermans back as our season sponsor. They are the perfect solution for straightforward legal advice. We know lots of you, Podpiggies, are buying your new homes, your first homes, so Watermans are the perfect solution for all of your legal advice. So for straightforward legal advice, remember Watermans. Happy Tuesday, guys, and welcome back to the best podcast in the world with me, Jessica. And me, Zoe.

She's got a deeper voice If you are not looking on YouTube The lovely Richard is with me today I was going to do a solo pod But I decided to bring him on board You're not a stranger to the pod though You've been on a few times Well I've been dragged on a couple times

I've been on a couple of times I've been on once before actually Patreon And then you're with Jason Season 3 I think Yeah And then you were The Grinch at the Christmas party Yeah

So this should be a piece of cake This should be a piece of cake Anyway before I intro any of you into Richard there's something that I would love to say and it is a massive thank you to everyone because it's our third birthday today well it was yesterday. Happy birthday a lot on your plate. Fat Marie, come on. Come on. Murray. Come on, Marie. So three whole years of a lot on your plate, guys. It has been a wild ride. I just want to say a massive thank you to everybody that listens every single week that subscribes to all of our channels. It really means a lot to us. It makes our

podcast search far and wide. Yeah, a big thank you to everybody that's been on the journey with us And huge thank you to Up Next Studios for making our dreams come true with this gorgeous studio and putting up with us every single week. A big thank you to you, Richard, and Jason, for being our whole purpose of content every single week. Yeah, I've noticed that recently on the shorts I've been getting a hammer. Yeah, yeah, we'll talk about that one in a moment. Also, thank you to our Patreon listeners. Without you guys, this wouldn't be possible whatsoever.

And, of course, our sponsors, a big thank you to Watermans for sponsoring our last two seasons of the podcast and all of our other sponsors throughout the, I think we're on, what, six seasons now, Murray? Yeah, yeah, see six. Shit. It must be classed as a successful podcast then. I would say so. Did you know one of the facts is that most podcasts

only last to seven episodes? I heard 20, but. Oh, did you? Yeah, but it's probably the same thing, yeah. I don't know. Same kind of thing. You're past that, do you know how many episodes are? No, we did that as a quiz in July,

the summer party in July, and I think it was something like 300, or something, if you included all of the specials, patron, side dishes, because side dish didn't used to be on Patreon, you see. So it's only two years. And we've also only been on YouTube for just over one year. So, yeah, just I wanted to say thank you so much, because without you guys, everybody listened to this.

We love you so much. And it's just getting bigger and better. And we hope that you love it and have been on this crazy journey with us because I can guarantee you now if you listen to season one versus now, things are very different. Very freaking different. Let's introduce. You?

Yep. So? Introduce me, not let me introduce you into Richard. That's what you said at the start. I'm not up for that. Oh, okay. Sounds kinky. Not in front of Murray anyway.

So, Richard. Jess. 11 years we've been together. Yeah. We have lived together for five. No, God, nearly nine. Yep. But we bought a house together five years ago.

Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. we are a dating app slash Instagram success story would you agree I'd say so I love that for us yeah probably more so Instagram than Tinder yeah you'd like to say that

backstory isn't I saw you on Tinder and if it wasn't for Tinder we wouldn't be here today okay thank you for you for being smart and putting your Instagram bio in your Tinder so you get the bitches to follow you yeah well it worked didn't it and then we are not married but we are new parents to our gorgeous son Jensen

who would have freaking thought I know it's it's been a wild five months really it's been absolutely bonkers but it's going well it's going well he seems to be getting a little personality and

you think you've cracked it or Jess probably thinks oh I've cracked this and then he'll just stop being a dick again, won't it? You can be a little dead. So every single day is completely different. But we're doing well.

I think we're smashing it, babes. We're trying our best and that's all you can ask for. And right now is our first parent-free. We only realise this just literally a minute ago. But this moment, this is our first date. Yeah, without Jensen, yeah. This is our first time just being you without a baby in five months. Jess got to the door earlier and I went to open it.

But I just expected her to have Jensen, like Hald, Carving. Jensen and I didn't say it to her but I was like oh oh yeah he's not here oh so I was a disappointment was I it was a little bit less of an excitement when he wasn't there yeah cheers thanks for that thank you for that he's actually with Jilly and Andy and I was actually just saying this there so not only is she a new mother she and her and her and her and her and her mom were going to look after Jensen but actually her mom's going to go around later but Andy's off today so it's uncle Andy and auntie Jilly day dropped him off and I was like what all the balloons for?

You know, because Wendy's a bit older now. Who's still sending a balloon? She went, oh, it's my Nandy's wedding anniversary today. I thought, I am fucking terrible. She was like, what else we're going to be doing? Oh, well, I know. Yeah, that's true. Now, well, are you a terrible friend because you took gents around or because you forgot?

No, not because I forgot. I think because on their wedding anniversary, they're looking after two children. Yeah, see, I've been forgetting a lot of important stuff recently. And I've got my niece's birthday. my sister's birthday my brother's birthday I forgot my dad's birthday I forgot all my friend's birthdays It's not just it's not out of like

I don't know I just think you just get consumed by what you're doing at the time Yeah I have to kind of make myself Go out my way to text people And ask if they're all right stuff Yeah I know it's it's hard work isn't it

I was saying this before But I was shit before I'm really shit now You Yeah you're horrendous I am terrible I'm still archived You're not archived no

I let you out of that Sometimes I meet you. Sometimes I just delete the whole chat and just... Sometimes just don't answer, yeah. Meet you for a whole day if you've pissed me off. My favourite thing is when Jessica rings me. I miss it by literally two rings and it's down and I miss it. Ring her straight back.

No answer. Like, how is this possible? No, I think the worst thing is when you go to the shop. I send you to the supermarket to get something for the shop. Oh, yeah. It is. I'm walking around the shop. There's steam coming out my ears.

And people are looking at me because I'm probably talking to myself. slam you off. As you always do. He has this thing where he likes to mutter shit. It's like you're a bit of a shit back and I'm like, you what? You always do that then.

I go, what was that this morning? What were you muttering this morning under your breath? Something was a shithole. I went, sorry, what was that? Just want to say it a bit louder. You went, this house is a shithole and who's false that then?

Because it's not mine. Yeah. It's a team effort. It was to do with the iron, I think. It was the iron. Well, if it's a team effort, then Jesus Christ. You might want to join the team mate.

Oh, really? Yeah. Really? Did you? I thought it's all I've heard. Gave Barf, I feed him. Great. I keep him alive.

No, your mum broke the iron. I'm going to call you out there, Polly. So hopefully you... She breaks a lot of stuff when she comes to our house, didn't she? She does, actually, yeah. She does. She broke the pram. Broke the pram.

Denied that to you. Denied it to the ground, actually, when I called her out of it yesterday. Oh, no, it wasn't me. Can I say Mama's and Papa's customer service is very good? Very good. Very good. You were slagling yesterday. I was slagling yesterday.

I was slagged. them this morning because can't be that good you were slacking them yesterday. Let me say, I made a complaint on email and said the hoods broke and they were like we'll send you a replacement. The reason I slag them was because I sat there realizing

it hasn't arrived. So then I emailed them like hello, where is the pram hood? You said it will be here in two days and it's now in two weeks and they were replied straight away and said sorry we had a bit of an error our side, we apologise, it will be with you in two days. So I'll keep you in check with that on.

Do you not think that, though, if there's been an error, they would contact you and let you know instead of using it. Exactly, yes. Okay. So we're saying that they're not good because of a 10%. Hope, we're sure. Right. Anyway, that was your intro to you.

Yep. We have been together 11 years. It feels like two years. And everything, and as much as I rip you, you are my best friend. And I love you very much. Is that the nice thing you were going to say? No, it isn't the nice thing I'm going to say. It isn't actually the nice thing I'm going to say.

No, you're my best friend. Who's a girl? I used to piss me off Every time Richard would say that I was his best friend He'd whisper who's a girl But I am literally your best friend though Yeah, who's a girl

No, that's not true I've got boymates who are a better friend No, that's not true That's like I know it's not true Makes me rage Right, this week A few things have happened I'm gonna ask you what's been a lot on your plate

Yep I've been doing loans actually Yeah, you have So I went down to Lester For my mum's graduation God bless her heart Guys you're never too young to chase your dreams.

Yeah, well done, Paul. She is 61. She is now got a degree in psychotherapy. Mm-hmm. So follow her at Conversations with Polly. If you would like to, I don't know, have a discussion about, just have a conversation. Yeah, have a conversation with Polly. So it was really nice.

I've never been to a graduation before. And what I will say is, as much as it is a very wholesome, wonderful day. God, it's long. Yeah. Because they have. Because everyone else is there who you do not care about. Couldn't give a shut. Kind of, yeah.

It's not even that, but they literally just call out name after name after name and you're there for basically five seconds of fame. Just a little handshake in a picture and off you pop. But no, I was welling up though. It was super duper cute and it was interesting because when Jensen was having a picture of my mom, I thought to myself, I sort of visualised myself in 20, 30 years, maybe longer than that and showing him a picture like, this is you at your grandma's graduation. Yeah.

And how weird that might be to get your head around. Oh, yeah. Do you know what I mean? I wonder what it would feel like for him, yeah. I wonder if it was his graduation. People do that to you, though, don't they? Like, oh, this was you. Yeah, but what I mean is,

it's not often that you would be alive when your grandma's graduating because she's a mature student, is what I mean. Oh, she's a mature student. She is a mature student. Ozzy Osbourne died and Hulk Hogan. No, devastated. Hasn't you feel you love wrestling, don't you?

Fucking the Hulkster. Hulkster, is that what it's called? Actually, I'm doing a... Not anymore. Not anymore. Yeah. Fuck, that's why it's going to be. Wow, Murray Savage.

Poof. Straight in there. Let him get cold, man. Jesus. I'm actually doing a competition at the end of August, where one of my friends, Grant. And he messaged me the other day out of the blue, like, mate, I really think you should grow your hair like a hot poland.

Right. Right? And I was like, where's this random comment came from? Because he, I think he knows I like wrestling, but I don't think he knows I've liked wrestling that much. But he messaged me basically saying, I think you should grow your hair for a proven grounds like Hulk Hogan. And I genuinely think, well, it's going at the top.

Right. So I could just grow up a seconds. A little long. He's wearing a bandana. But I'm not sure I'd pull it off as well as Hulk Hogan. Right, talking of hair. A bit of a sad week. Straight past the deaths, straight to hair.

Straight to the hair. Yeah. You're going to tell everyone what's happening next week? Why are you laughing? I'm not laughing. I'm just, now you've said it. It's going to happen. Yeah, I'm going to, my hair's going to go, I'm going to shave it, I'm going to be wild.

Wow. I'm going to have to just bite the bullet because I don't want to get hair transplant because I think. Hey, never say never. I've learned those mistakes in the podcast. I'll do your respect if you, well, unless anyone's watching, they want to pay for it, that's fine. Yeah, by the way, somebody sponsor you. That's brilliant. Somebody sponsor Richard with a hair transplant and I'll talk about it.

Great. We can do flash up photos of about the progress on YouTube. You can actually prove me wrong. No, but the reason why I'm not just going to go to Turkey and get a hair transplant is because, one, I cannot be honest with the whole process of it. Two, it's still expensive. Two, it's pretty expensive. And three. This is the real reason, and I know what you're going to say.

It looks shit. No. Okay. No, is it different? Don't get me wrong, if you've heard one and you like it, then great. But I just think it makes you look like you're at this stage I'm at now. I disagree. I do think with the hair transplant, I don't think they're amazing because it's not.

natural hair well it is but you know what I mean it's not a natural process but it's more that you can actually tell I think a hair transplant it's almost like you can see sort of redness and like the really like the dots around the hair line

everyone just say just shave it just shave it you say it all the time don't you just shave it yeah if it was that easy I would just shave it I know it's a big deal it is and I agree and I do think that's something that is quite savage with with women and and even men as well there's a lot of banter around

lads losing the hair but I think men don't really speak about it I do think it's a massive deal imagine saying to a woman just shave your hair then like we would be devastated yeah I don't I think yeah and I'm sorry for being insensitive to your feelings thanks um but put it this way you've never looked at a bald guy and thought he shouldn't be bald never but equally richard you're not going to look bad bold you are a very handsome man and you've got a lot of facial hair I am going to look bad you're not what makes you think you're going to look bad well I've got a wrinkly forehead Yeah, but you've always had a wrinkly forehead Yeah, but I've always had hair

So Well, we're going to find out Anyway, next haircut Because I need to get my beard done I think I'm putting it off that much That my beard's growing over my lips Yeah, because you start sucking you of bloody moustache now So it's getting done next week

What I thought the point was you were going to say was You don't want to have a hair transplant Because you cannot exercise for so many times That's another reason I can't be bothered with all that Like you can't I sweat That's really the real reason isn't it? Pretty much, yeah

Because Richard, right, this is something that is quite hilarious. Richard told me that, well, he's now covered in tattoos and you can't even see, but he has always had very protruding abs, right? Quite scary, actually, when I first went out with yours. I was like, whoa, whiplash, because they were intense. And you said to me that when you were a kid, what did you do? Every day, morning and night? Well, from about the age, I'm going to say, about 12.

Wow To When was I living in Nottingill Say 21 Mm-hmm Didn't start at this number But like I built up to it

And for about maybe eight years I was doing a thousand crunches a day Very And I used to be obsessed With the fact that I couldn't I'd have to do them So I'd sometimes do 500 in the morning Sometimes do 500 night

Sometimes I'd do 10 sets of 100 Sometimes I'd split them up So it felt different Like not felt different But I just got them done differently but there was some days honestly where I would be I'd wake up and I'd absolutely dread the fact that I'd have to do these setups

and no one was making me do them and anyway the point of the story is it's probably the reason why I had four groin operations because I was doing fucking thousand setups so yeah don't do that kids yeah but maybe that is the reason why your core is

phenomenal shot to bits you mean maybe yeah I mean could be that so yeah I thought I would just say that fact because is that what Jensen's going to be like then? Yeah, Jensen's not allowed to do anything until he's 10 push-ups. Honestly, he does not take after me, but he is such a strong little man, isn't he? Some of the stuff are like, what an earth!

It's funny as well, when he put him on his front now, we're just talking about Jensen all the time, we've become their parents. We are those parents, I think. He can tell he's trying to, like, move and, like, not walk, but, like, crawl. And he gets so pissed off, yeah, just start shouting. He was shouting last night in his crib, and I was just, like, pretending it was me or not. It's got this weird, like, husky voice now, hasn't it? And it's like an angry force.

We're just sitting in the living room just pissing ourselves. This week, I wanted to talk about a viral video that went online. By the way, another big thank you to Becca and Hannah, who are part of the Alight team now that help us with all social media and put all the clips out, help us with everything. And they're making everything look so good. so we didn't pick the social clips. So when this came out,

I was actually having a pair of PT with Richard and somebody messaged him saying, oh, Richard, you're getting it tight on the short this morning. My bum hole fell out because I was thinking, oh my God, I know that was on a Patreon episode and I liked to open up a little bit more on there. And I thought, what on earth have I said? Anyway, you saw I played it out

and I was waiting to put the 15 second clip, my ass, I was going, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum. And you look at me and you go, yeah fair and I thought thank God for that guys anyway the the video went viral pretty much on Insta and TikTok well it had quite a lot of views and obviously a lot of comments mostly on Instagram as as always the ladies agree

some of the men were fully on board with what I was trying to say but I think this is the point when you put shorts and reels out there that when you take a clip of something of a really bigger conversation it almost seems like it's taken a completely Yeah, a context. Well, it's there to get your attention, is that? Yeah, of course. The reason why you do a short,

yeah. Look at me talking about it. Shorts. Shorts is on YouTube, okay, love it's called a reel. Done one podcast and I'm an expert. But the shorts there to get your sucked in. I always do it when I'm watching boxing things on YouTube.

The captions always, someone's slagged off someone and I'm... You're straight on there. Straight on there for 15 minutes and I'm waiting for it. It never comes. Really? I never said anything. All right, okay. Do you mean so?

Well, I did say something, and I stand firmly by it. But I think what was taken slightly out of context, what people probably didn't realize on TikTok, may I add, was me saying you doing the bare minimum, I actually wasn't saying that at all. What I was saying was the fact that men get congratulated when doing something that I class as doing the bare minimum of parenting, which is you get up and change his nappy,

oh my God, doesn't he go about it? above and beyond. Like, what a hands-on dad he is. Nah. Guys, I'm sorry. That is just not okay. And that narrative, and may I say, this was nothing aimed at men, it was aimed at people saying that comment, which are mostly said from women. Yeah, it's mostly either the grandmother. Yes. Or the mother-in-law. Yes. Isn't it? Very true. I'm not sure if my mom would say anything like that. I don't know. I think she would just expect me to do it. Yeah. She's, raised a good man.

Like you should put it this way if Jessus can't do it then who else is going to do it? Yeah. It needs to be me doesn't it? Of course. Or vice versa.

But yeah and yeah some things were said out of context where I would say something like he should be helping me out in the restaurant which and somebody pulled me up on me saying that and yeah it's quite sad that I said that by default

you shouldn't be helping me out you should be helping Jensen out yeah I didn't mean it like that but what I wanted to say was you do go way above and beyond and what you did for me day before yesterday I wanted to shout about because I feel like I take the piss out of you all the time

the podcast and I want to tell everyone what you did okay yes cool so I went down to Leicester and we drove down together didn't we when did we go down last Thursday Friday so fucking our Saturday we went down on Saturday just two days after

yeah and then you came back the next day on the train I then came back up to Scotland day before yesterday I was dreading it, guys, over five hours. Bear in mind, you have to stop multiple times when you've got a child in a small infant in a car seat and I'm still breastfeeding so it's like, it's very intense for me

and I was just dreading it, wasn't that? Yeah, I totally get that as well because... I just knew it would take me all day. Where was I yesterday? I went somewhere yesterday in the morning. No, I went to pets at home, but I took gentle women.

Yeah. And honestly, they, absolute anxiety you get when you put them in the car and you're like, please just be, please don't scream. Yeah, please, please. Because it's the worst thing ever. So obviously you're going for five hours.

At some point he is going to start kicking off and getting bored. He's not going to sleep for five hours. And obviously you can't let him do that either. So Richard text me, bless him. All I did was say, I've got real bad anxiety about tomorrow. And what you did, my angel, was you booked a ticket. I'm a hero. On a train.

No, you are really good. And you booked a train ticket and you cut up the train to Lancaster. Lancaster. It was 45 minutes south from Glasgow and I met you on the service stations and you took over the drive and we got out

and we took over the drive and you just drove straight back with me and I just thought you know what you're hands on dad carefully no what she thought was fucking bare minimum he should be doing that

no but I wanted to shout about it because I thought that's really really nice told my nan about it obviously she was like oh my God what a good man he is God he's such a good man

What a hero. He's a hero. He's the top of the list. She loves you. Bloody Nora. But, you know, in the car journey, guys, we've got this weird thing. Let me just say something that you said that fucking piss me off when I was on the train. Okay, fantastic.

Let's go. So I get on this train, going up the road. I've just finished work. Straight on the train. Got to go back to work when I get back. Get a message from Jess. Did she reply to my response? No.

Well, you managed to text me. When? When you were driving? No, I didn't. I texted you before when I was at my mum's house. That is the honest truth She texts me saying When you get to Lancaster

If you do me a favour And just get a taxi To the nearest services station And I'll just collect you from there And in my head I'm like I'm coming nearly three hours out my way After you're getting up at 5am And having to go back to work at night

You're not just driving to Lancaster train station Get me? Do you know what it was? It wasn't that I thought in my head It was Lancaster services Obviously that's not the train station In my head, I was picturing that.

Then I was thinking, fuck, I wonder how far away it is. And I thought, oh, bloody, I've not left in enough time. I didn't want to keep you waiting. Oh, so you were late. So I was wondering if I kept you waiting, you could just get a taxi in that time. Anyway, it works out perfectly. What I wanted to say was, in the car journey, right, guys, you know, a lot of parents, I would imagine, have this song that they play for babies,

maybe dancing fruit or some happy song. The weirdest, weirdest thing, right, he can. can be screaming, which is often in the car, I play this one song. It's a house version of I can get off my horse and I can let you go. That one. You are the one. That's enough. Ooh. And silence, isn't it? It's almost like we've got that camera. It's like he's possessed. Absolutely devastated. He likes that song as well. You want him to be like, yeah, definitely. to like rock or whatever.

Thank fuck. He takes his music taste after his mother because your music taste is terrible. It's not actually. I think he'd like Alex on fire. No. Went to watch them recently. No one knows who that is, Richard.

There's no point saying it on the podcast. God love you, but no. They're good. You know what? I'll give it to you. I looked at the videos of the concert afterwards and what I liked about it, not one person,

because it was a video from the stage, but one person was on their phone recording and I thought that's a proper mosh pit of a... And you sent me a video afterwards. It was the pure it, guys. He had his top off and he was like ringing the top from like the sweat. No, I didn't do. That's pure lies.

I didn't not ring. I was with my pals, right? They're proper heavy metal and they go all the time. A married couple and hearty. And I said mosh pit at one point. And they must have got the ick. They must have just looked at me thought. Why is...

That's not what you call it. Oh, what is it called then? I thought it was going to wash pit I thought it was a mosh pit Yeah, rock on Honestly you're embarrassing You got your tattoo that I got you for father this day Yes I got a Jensen tattoo

A little little baby With some tattoos He's like that Random yeah And then you've got mum written on the head He's got a mum tattoo A baby's eyebrow May I add 11 years relationship

And that's the only thing I've got Of me on his full bodied tattooed Why do you want a tattoo You don't lean like them And then you want me to tag You've got a portrait of the cats On your thigh

Yeah but you don't like tattoos And you're saying I've literally got five on my body. Of course I like tattoos. She doesn't like tattoos. If I don't like them, why have I got them? To be fair, my favour's the Daisy Chain. That's nice.

Fuck off. Right. Anyway, so I'll add the song into the newsletter. Yeah. In case any of you want to see if you're a child, maybe it's got some sort of like secret beat. My dad listened to it and he was mind-blown. He was like, no way.

He goes, it must be like a heartbeat of the beat or the bass. It must be something that he just calms him down and he likes it. Maybe it's because I was like, took him to Croatia. Oh, yeah, maybe. When you were... First of all he was raping in the tummy. Yeah. Maybe.

Right. So, we've got some questions. Listen and sent in some questions for us both. We have some parenting questions. How we can get or do we have our spark back in our relationship? Loll. When you find out, let us know. And we've also had some questions for you.

terms of, like, fitness questions and things. And we also have a lot of listeners dilemmas that want to have your opinion. So we're going to carry this on to into Patreon. What would you like to cover right now? Is this on the podcast? Yeah, I'm asking you. You're the host, love. What would you like?

You're Zoe? I'm Zos. Let's just do the, let's do the dilemmas. Yeah? Let's do that. All right, then. You're not going to ask me a lot on my plate, though. Oh, shit.

What's been a lot on your plate? No, you need to do it better than that. All right. Richard, but I can't continue without asking you what's been a lot on your plate I've got on my plate I've had loads going on to be fair I've just been working a lot

at the unit in Coatbridge that's where I work every day 5am oh yeah sun, wind, rain I'm out there no so just been working at the unit they're actually moving

to another fun of enough a bigger unit which is good for the boys so they're doing great I've got a lot of competitions coming up soon Fitness competitions Yeah so I've got one next weekend

Called Trinity War Where it's like a Masters thing So it's three Teams of three Three guys Me Mills and Hardy Because we're all old as fuck All right

So we're in the Masters And then tribal clash in August In August Where's that? Cornwall? No Black Bull Sands Which I don't know if it's

I think it's Devon Yeah So that'll be fun on. Obviously, we went to Alex on fire. That was good. Yep. What else has been happening? Got some tattoos. Just been plodding along, really, looking after Jensen. We had a daddy day day yesterday.

Yesterday, and that was fun. We went to see my brother and things, so. Yeah, remember. Sounds actually boring when you said it aloud, does that? Yeah, but that is, that's quite a lot for you. Yeah. But no, it was good. We're very opposite in that sense, aren't we? We have been.

Yeah, I like staying in the house and I actually miss staying in the house. in the house. We don't do that much anymore. No, you don't. I do. Yeah, you do. You hate it. And I hate it. And I hated.

They absolutely despise life. And we're going to, we're going to Ibitha together. I don't know if I've said this in the pod, guys. Oh, we are, yeah. Oh, shut up. What are you going to say? You can't be asked? Yeah.

But what is it what happens when we go? You always bloody love it. I have fun, yeah, but it's just, I hate the thought. I haven't to get on the plane and do all that shit. Yeah. God, it's so hard, isn't it? It's a hard life, isn't it? Such a hard life, being able to go on a holiday. Honestly, get a grip of yourself.

Oh, sorry. So I'm going to Mioka with my friend Pam. I'm actually meeting her shifts in Dubai. And then I'm going to be flying solo. I'm a bit nervous about that. And then I'm going to fly internally from Mioka just for the weekend in Palmer to Ibiza to meet you. Just for three days.

Zoe's also there at the same time. So which you'll love because the girlie's there. Richard just loves the girlies. So we'll all be together with baby boy. Time to check on the skies. It's another sunny day in Calgary. Forecast calls for high levels of economic activity. Late afternoon, we've got a burst of potential in a place ranked North America's most livable city.

Tomorrow, blue sky thinking in the blue sky city should hold steady. And the outlook remains optimistic throughout the week. So come grab your dreams and enjoy watching them take hold. It's possible in Calgary, the Blue Sky City. For the full economic forecast, visit calgary economic development.com. Are you looking to buy your first home and don't know where to start? Well, don't worry, our friends at Watermans will do all of that stuff for you. They won't be packing your boxes for you, but they'll do everything else.

So for straightforward, legal advice, remember Watermans. What's been a lot on your plate than, Jesse? So I went to Bonnington Farm. as well this week. Guys, I really recommend it. It's a gorgeous staycation down in Sutton Bonington, which is just next to East Midlands Airport. So nice.

It's like a family farm, and they've restored four massive sort of like tin containers, if you like, or they've made a few. There's one like farmhouse, one actually built really cool house, then two, I don't know, would you say like oil tanks? I can't really...

What do you mean? I don't know what they look like. They're like circular tin. They must have been... They're restored from something. Are they tall? Yeah, really tall. There would have been something probably use on a farm.

Like silage containers or something. I don't know. I don't know. But surely went on that until. It's like a house, no? Yeah. I'll just be like the containers. It'll just be a different shape of container.

Yeah. Anyway, they're really nice. I recommend you say there. So anyway, when I tag them, they had like a thousand followers just from my stories, right? And they want me to share a competition. Oh, yeah. So that's really cool.

So when are you going to do that? when I have time to edit it, but I'll try and get around to it or edit some videos and put it on my grid and you can win a stay there. So that's been a lot on your plate. They also went to the Radcliffe Arms? The Radcliffe Arms, yeah. How did you say it? Radcliffe Arms, is it?

It's in a place called Bunny, which is just outside Nottingham. So when me and Richard first stated, if anyone that doesn't know Richard, right, Richard and I, I was in Leicester at the time when you were in Cambridge. Richard used to play professional football. And then you moved to London Yeah But you lived in Nottingham Because you first ever signed professional football

When you signed for Nottingham Forest When you were how old? 18 18 Right So then you live with a guy called Steve I think I've spoke about him on the podcast before But he's like your second dad

Isn't he? Stephen Nann, yeah Stephen Nann, yeah And basically when you then signed for Grimsby when I was in London You still lived in Nottingham and commuted every day

Back to Nottingham, yeah. And then we went to this place. And we used to go to this place called the Bunny, the Radcliffe Arms, the bunny. It's basically a carvary. Now, Carvaries aren't the best Sunday roast ever, but you all guys know I love a Sunday roast. But I would say, as Carvaries go, it's up there with one of the best, isn't it? The options are endless. It's so good.

So is that not a Sunday roast at no? What? A carvary? Yeah, yeah, yeah. But what I mean is carvaries are food that's been sat out for a longer period of time, isn't it? and they're just sort of replenished. And they're not, a bit like Toby Carvery.

It's okay. It's okay, but on the standards of Sunday roast, it's not, in my opinion, my snobbery Sunday roast opinion, not the best tasting. Well, okay, yeah. Like the Clarence that we went to,

that was the bollocks, right? Yeah. There's nothing, it's obviously compared to Toby Carverie, but it's nothing like that. No. Yeah. But Toby Carvey has its place.

I loved it with that when I was a kid. Yeah. I mean, I don't love it now, but anyway. So that's what's been a lot of place. I would say that was a big massive shout. I loved that so much. So if you are listening

from down there, definitely head there and definitely go to Bonington Arms at Bonington Arms, Bonington Farm. And I then went to a place called Public in Mount Sorrel, which is a cafe apparently

in Loughborough, Nottingham and Mount Sorrel. And this one is like a collaboration with Claude and Coe, which is a gorgeous if you've got children, you'll have seen it. It's a gorgeous kids wear brand

but it's actually from Leicester. Oh, is it? Yeah. It's Stockton Selfridges and John Lewis if you want to have a look. And it's just super duper cool, like oversized t-shirts, cool, oversized jeans. They're the ones that trademark, the milking it quote, that you see a lot of kids wear.

We've got some of them, right? Yeah. I bought one from there. So, yeah, check them out on Instagram, Claude and Co. It's so, so nice. And it's in Leicester. And basically, they have this amazing, really cool, you know, like open pipework, industrial sort of building where it's like a cafe matches, very Scandinavian. then they had a working space for like co-working

so one side of the room was like all people working on their laptops very cool everyone like their 30s then it was all the mums with the prams and then it was the cool kid shop so yeah no it's not really your vibe but the girlies would like to know that sounds good yeah yeah sounds good so right let's get into it let's get into some of our dilemmas

and then we'll ask our questions on Patreon yeah should we do that sounds good to me okay let's go this actually seems like like perfect timing. I found out I was pregnant last week and safe to say it was the biggest shock of our lives. Despite not doing anything to prevent it, lull. Sounds like us. I feel like I've come to terms with it as a lot a lot quicker than my boyfriend has. And I just wanted to see if there's anything in particular you and Rich would advise for me to support him to. What a lovely girl. He has been great at reassuring me this past week, but I feel we're both still processing

it and I want to be able to help him as best I can. Firstly, What a really, really nice girl. Yeah. Another girl who thinks she can't get pregnant. I know. But no, congratulations, guys. That's awesome. It's good news, isn't it?

To support your man, I don't know. Just give him a little bit of time. It takes time to actually process it. And you're going to process it in different ways, aren't you? I think we were the same. Yeah. You were crying for three weeks straight. I was.

You were? You kept smirking at me? I think you were secretly loving it. What are you crying? No, that I was pregnant. I think it's hard for the gaity process stuff because it's not physically happening to your body. Like nothing changed.

Like I can imagine for you, knowing that you've got a baby inside you must be the weirdest thing ever. Yeah. Like something's grown inside you and you're going to have a, you've got all these worries of, I'm going to get bigger, I'm going to get stretch marks,

I've got to give birth. I'll be honest with you, if I actually take myself back to that first few weeks, which is so not important, now and I think about it, but it's just so natural for a woman to think all those things I think. Yeah, I did anyway. I was honestly thinking, oh my God, my whole body's going to change. Not one part of me thought about the baby because you have no emotional connection to them at all. And it's also, which I've been quite open about, it was something that I could

never see from my future. But I think we were both like that, weren't we? Yeah, I think as a guy, this is how I kind of thought about it. You know, I'm having a baby, but six months down the line, you're still like, try to tell yourself, like, I'm going to have a baby. Like, even when feel of them kicking, it still doesn't... Yeah, one of my friends a couple of weeks ago was like, oh, Jess was very similar, like, towards the end, like middle. She's like, she'd be buying loads of stuff for the baby, and I didn't really buy anything, did I?

No, you did not. Yeah, I didn't go out of my way to buy anything because I was just like, almost in my head you just think it's not happening, but it is. Yeah. And I'll just buy it when the baby comes if I need it. Yeah. That makes sense, you know what I mean? I think one of my friends similar to those guys who wrote in that,

he's going through the process at the minute. He's a little bit further down the line where his girlfriend's like, are you even bothered? Yeah. You don't even want to touch. I keep saying the baby's kicking and you don't even want to feel it and can you, sometimes you can't feel it.

Yeah. Like you were saying that to me, won't you? Every time you touch it, they stop. Yeah, they'd stop or it's not that you don't care. It's just that it's not physically there. So you're just like, I just needed it to be here. And then you can start really shitting yourself. That must be hard for a guy

So when I was pregnant then I'd just say give him Give him a bit more time Like what did you think Going through your head then Because it's all well and good Or women Talking about what happened to them

And I think you just think about your life's going to change Right Okay Everything's going to change And you almost kind of think I'm not going to be able to do X, Y and Z because of this

Yeah When really Your life's the same really For a guy Like we've spoke about this recently you probably do resent me a little bit because I can go out and do pretty much the normal stuff I was doing. I would just say just give him a little bit more time to, he's not going to show it in any mad way, he's not going to jump from the rooftops, like, I'm going to be a dad

and he'll show it in different ways. Like it just takes time and it might take to the point of the baby being there in his hands. Yeah. Because I think that's what I was like, really, wasn't that? Totally. You asked me a lot of time, like, he even bothered. You even want this baby? I never said that to you. When Richard and I were at my birth, which we spoke a bit about on my birth story on Patreon, because Rich was on that video with me for a short time.

But it was so weird. I think even when the baby was born, I know a lot of dad's cry. And maybe it was a situation that happened to me because it was just so long. And it was almost like a relief that it was finally happening because it was so long. But you didn't cry No And I thought you would But I didn't cry

Well I did I think I did But I was so tuned to the moon I was on every flipping drug Going at that point And I was exhausted But yeah There's a lot going on

Even then you realised That it's happening No I think it was week three for me When I woke off Because you are on some sort of like adrenaline And high aren't you

In the newborn stage Like that newborn bubble It's incredible guys If you are pregnant Please value that time intensely. But when you wake up and then you realize, okay, this is, the baby isn't like going back. You are like, oh my God, this is my life now. And I think that can be really hard to actually deal with, especially with, I don't, I'm only talking to myself here, but like with

my hormones and everything, it was really difficult for me to get my head around. And I don't know if that was because he cried an awful lot. But yeah, in that point, point, of my life I was thinking oh my god is this ever going to yeah I think there'll be different stages for them like at the minute you you've just found out and yeah especially if you weren't planning it and it's just happened it's hard like I can imagine if it's different if you planned something like that and you do get pregnant and you'd be over the mood yeah yeah whereas if it's just happened it's a shock yeah and people deal with that in different ways so I would just say just give your man a little bit more time do exactly what you said you were going to do which is really

sweet and support them the best you can and trust me he'll show it at that you'll show it at some point, it might be when it comes out. Honestly, what I will say is, though, as a positive, it really is the best thing that's ever happened to us, isn't it? What did you say the other day? Without sounding too deep about it, you kind of just make sense. It's like, we are here to reproduce. Yeah, if you like...

Really, that's the reason why we're here. And when you do have a baby, you're like, oh, kind of makes sense now, really. Yeah. That was it. Maybe a little bit deeper. You said it a lot deeper than that. Yeah, but I'm not going to say it on this. Oh, whatever.

No, the other thing is really sweet. It does, it does make you, I still look at him now, and I actually, it doesn't make any sense to me that he's mine, ours. It makes no sense that he's a real person. And I don't even know when that will. But what I will say to you is it really is the best thing ever, and it does get easier if you're listening to this and you're in the early stage. Everything that everybody told me, when I was going through it,

it gets easier. And then I'm sure that everyone that's listening to this has got a toddler. They're like, just you wait. And, yeah, he's on the move nearly and I can almost tell that it's going to be tough. The thing is, it is what it is. Like, you can't, it's going to happen. He's going to move and he's going to do his thing.

Yeah. We'll just figure out of it as we go. I'm pretty sure if you listen to last week's side dish, me and Rich are getting the ball rolling with potentially moving house, aren't we? Hopefully, yeah. So we're getting things rolling, rolling with that. And we need to get Watermans on board. Well, Jess is getting things rolling with that.

Of course. Not doing out, really. Of course. But no, I'm going to get Watermans to actually help with some, for that actually and well all of my legal side of that and then we've got two house valuations on Monday so we'll know where we stand in terms of like equity and what we can realistically afford because we're escapes hopefully that helped but I probably didn't really I think it does help babes good luck we're your pregnancy someone said a nice message here I just want to say

I loved a recent pod where Jess talks about motherhood how you described it is exactly how I felt for both babies and it passes but also comes and goes again. It's so normal to feel resentment. Your life changes in a lot of ways and you mourn the old you, but also look what you have done and grown into. A mum, the best version of you. You're smashing it, Jess, and you look amazing your little man is a king. What a cute thing. Sweet, yeah. I had lots of nice messages from that, actually. I'm glad it helps some people. Time to check on the skies. It's another sunny day in Calgary. Forecast calls for high levels of economic activity. Late afternoon, we've got a burst of potential in a place ranked

North America's most livable city. Tomorrow, blue sky thinking in the blue sky city should hold steady, and the outlook remains optimistic throughout the week. So come grab your dreams and enjoy watching them take hold. It's possible in Calgary, the Blue Sky City. For the full economic forecast, visit calgary economic development.com. Emma, but I seem to be really struggling with what to prioritise in life. I'm 28. I've been with my boyfriend for seven years and we change our mind daily on what the next chapter is for us. You recently mentioned on the pod that everyone is getting engaged and it seems to put so much pressure on that we should keep doing the same thing and keep up. But we also

want to buy a bigger flat or take some time off work and go travelling. But when's a good time to take a break from our careers when we are both progressing? I would love to get engaged but we're not in a massive rush to get married. But as I get older and my parents get older, I worry about having to do things by a certain time and then financially we obviously can't do it all at once. How do you know what is the right path

is for you through your 20s and 30s when everyone is doing such different things? Well, there's a lot going on there, isn't it? Engaged, marriage, new house, or flat or whatever, your careers. I think you just need to break it down into what's the most important thing for you if the most important thing is getting engaged

and marry then do that if it's getting a new flat do that like you just said there financially you can't do everything at once and there's no set time to do anything like who says exactly who says

honestly that question doesn't do my head in but people get into that point where they feel as though they have to do something by a certain time or a certain year like who makes the rules it's your life like get married when you're 80 if you want but don't you think social media

is a massive problem with that like comparison is the thief of joy almost where we're constantly looking at other people's highlight reels of all these big milestones in their life and it almost like it gives you a setback that I'm not there yet and before in the olden days

you would never have that window into other people's life and you would never know for me if that was if I got influenced that much by social media I would just get rid of it I just wouldn't look at it or delete it or whatever I can look at stuff on social media

and just be like what a load of bollocks that is yeah I'm not everyone's like that but I just pick what's the most important thing for you and your boyfriend like if it's getting a new flat

or a bigger flat then go and strive to do that or if it's to go and travel then go and travel yeah have a conversation you're more likely to now to travel now as a couple

than you are when you get a little bit older and do have babies or get married or whatever because of obviously finances so if I was to pick anything out of that and you both really want to do one of those options I'd be like go and travel I'd say the same thing

you're never going to be able to have time to freely do that with all the other things you're going to get a job when you come back it's not a big deal and I'll be honest with you unless your career is something that you hold that dear to you and it's like the biggest thing in your life

I always try and think about this where when people work for companies and they're like oh I want to do this and do it and go moving beyond as soon as you die someone else is taking your spot they don't care yeah do you know what I mean so I mean that in the nicest way

so like I would go and travel go and do your thing get out your system then come back you'll get another job that job will still be there the house will still be there exactly but the time won't be Time is the biggest thing You know it also makes me think as well

About pressures And we speak about this a lot On the pod means ours But I really do think We need to normalise Not being sure There's so much stigma Around having this

Answer to life And Who's sure about their life Who's got their whole life mapped out? No one Like you pick one Opportunity

Like we just said there About this couple Going travelling They could end up living In Australia Because they've found a career In Australia I know

another country, or they could go their separate ways and meet someone else and get married to someone else. Like, you just absolutely do not have a clue. What is mapped out? I mean, you can kind of guide yourself and obviously you make choices and these choices take you into different paths of your life. But there's no set plan. Who decided that?

I think that's the excitement of it all, isn't it? The unknown. You don't know what's happening, do you? But everyone's different. I know some people really like that sort of vision board and those five-year goals and they like to work to that. That's how they process things better. But it sounds to me like you want all these things,

but you're feeling pressure from society of what to do by a certain time. And actually, the only person that's holding you back is you and your anxiety about it. The more and more you think about what to do, the more time you're wasting. Yeah. I mean, look at us. We're both, you're 36 this year, I'm 35. We've only just had a baby. We're only just thinking about moving into a bigger house and we're not married.

And we haven't got a clue what we do. And we don't have any pressure ourselves, like if those things happen for us. We've always had that mindset, I think, of if it happens, it happens, haven't we? We've never really been, like, dead certain on it. And that's where I was trying to get the angle up at let's normalize not being sure. Because so many people have said things to me like, oh, you know, you didn't want kids or this, that. I think we need to normalise women and anyone, actually. if they're not sure if they want to have children

and then they change their mind that is so okay we shouldn't have to be stuck to this one thing that we've said and it has to be gospel I think it's just the like you said the pressure from other people

from family members probably like moms, dads and people on social media pick what you want to I would say pick what you want out of those options and run with it and just go away and don't look back

the other stuff can wait next let's go it's quite good these actually, there's a few questions here about when did Rich realize he was dating an idiot payback I'll let you think of that one you can answer me on side dish

now you're friends with quite a lot of younger guys keep you young keep you knowing on the dating scene apps that are around these days it's very different to when we were on Tinder or maybe it wasn't maybe you can answer this why are men so flaky now on dating apps and no one

wants anything serious it's really hard times I think the problem with dating apps is they should almost be called hookup apps for boys, I'd say. And women. And girls, yeah, and girls. I think the majority of people who are on those dating apps, I would say as a lad, you're probably not looking for a relationship. Probably just looking for a hookup, do you know what I mean? And I think hinge is the one where they want one.

Or is there different apps for, like, what you want? Well, it's kind of like that's what they've been known for now. That makes sense. Yeah. I mean, we technically came from an app, but. But I don't actually know. Rich, I'll be honest with you, though. I wasn't looking for a relationship either.

Yeah, exactly. I wasn't looking for a hookup. I think I was actually a saw Tinder as a bit of a game. I loved it. Yeah, it was something to do. And it was quite, it was a new app at the time. It was really fun. And then, you know, I was quite, like, resistive to you.

wasn't I? Is that the word to you? Like I was I almost held back quite a bit because I really liked you but I was I was 24 I just thought I've got I don't want to be tied down I don't know

it's difficult because when I was playing football there was always a young lads obviously going out and doing whatever but they would go out and meet girls and they'd probably meet girls who were But you would just use it as a hookup no I'm talking about when I was playing football

when we were together Oh and uh yeah I think they'd probably just look at it more as a hookup you're probably trying to like if you go out on a night out maybe it's a better way to meet someone and kind of have that connection yeah rather than through the through an app yeah you probably get the vibe pretty early doors of whether someone who wants to go out with you on a day and take you out consistently or just have a hookup

at imagine there must be a thing on the actual app where it says I'm looking for something serious or I'm looking for a bit of fun Maybe you should put that on your bio just say I'm not looking for a hookup Yeah Let's just not take the piss Make it a little bit more clearer than that Yeah, but equally

Girls, ghost boys All the time Yeah Right, there's some gossip here Someone sent us some goss My boyfriend and I have been together For eight years We have a mortgage together

And we'll probably have kids at some point But not in a rush As we love life We're not engaged but have talked about it over the last few years and no engagement in marriages on the cards we've decided to go and choose an engagement ring for me together at the Argyle Arcade

which I'm so excited about I'm a type A girlie but also have no idea type A means somebody that's really super organised That is my question Oh you're not going to know what this is Someone that's very basically the Zoe I'm the type B Yeah the chaos

But also have no idea what kind of ring I want As I like to see things on me before buying them example clothes and I'm so bad at imagining what things will look like until I see it in person he will propose with the chosen ring at a later date so there's still an element of surprise I wanted to share this with you

as I feel like there's a lot of pressure on men to pick the ring and plan a big fancy engagement when in reality a lot of us girlies would probably love the whole experience of getting to go for the ring shopping and having that as a core memory with your bestie bestie being the guy yes right

now I know we're not married or I've done that what was your opinion or like have you ever crossed your mind about what to do for that do you think I would be fussy with the type of ring or do you feel pressure do you think any of your friends have felt pressure or would you prefer to do that

shopping experience? I think from the people I've spoke to have done that feel the pressure of making sure the ring is big enough right the diamond and I guess expensive enough when really in reality that shouldn't really matter should it? No but there are people that do love the diamond.

They love the size. Yeah, she probably wouldn't go out with someone like that. That'd be my advice, Detchum. Maybe I'm just cheap, I don't know. I don't know. I think if that's what they want to do

and they're both happy to go and do that and try the ring on and make an experience between them both, I think that's quite nice. Yeah, so my point is, do you think you'd quite like that experience with me? Would I?

If I've said to you, I think I would like to go and do that. You would like to do it yourself? Yeah. Yeah. I don't think I... I think I've got a confidence in picking something that you would like and I think I don't mean this in a bad way but

I don't think it would matter too much for you. No, it wouldn't. It actually really wouldn't. Yeah. I mean, what I would probably do is... Ooh. Is steal the ring that she's got on at the minute. I said that two years ago.

Because it's our great grannies. By the way, somebody comments. commented on our video engagement ring I think people think that I'm engaged guys I need to be honest with you

my finger's got so fat post my finger doesn't feel that finger anymore and the only thing it fits on is the wedding ringer what I would do is take that

steal it and propose me with it yeah but I'd like you to polish it up a little I mean you thought it was lost for yeah I'd get it

cleaned up and stuff like but yeah that would be my game plan and it'd be much you should just propose to me with my aura ring cost that fucking much yeah

I have that one. Make it worthwhile. Make sure the apps open when you're waiting for the yes or no. I can just decline. Yes, no. No, but I think that's a really nice idea for them too. And going back to the previous one, there's no set rules. Do what you want. Exactly.

If that makes you happy and you both want to go and experience that together, go out for the day and have a few drinks and then go and get your shopping. That sounds like a really nice day. But I think she's not asking us all, I think she's just giving us the goss and maybe just wanted to let other girlies know that. She's really happy with that. Yeah, you crack on hand. You crack on her.

Spilling the tea. That's it, isn't it? That's spilling the tea. Spilling the tea, why? Spill in the lingo. Right, well, that's us for today, Ritchie. We'll go over to Patreon and we've got lots of juicy, Lucy questions about our relationship, parenthood, some questions about fitness.

People want your advice on a few bits of Bobby Wobbies. Are you okay to come over there, answer? And we'll save all of the other dilemmas, because guys, thank you so much. You sent in so many. But I think a lot of them would be really. good for Zoe and I to answer together as well. Yeah. Better than me. No, not better than you at all.

Different. But just, it's good for us to have. Thanks for listening. I appreciate you having to go through that. I was a little bit stiff today. You weren't. I think you warmed up like halfway into the app. You're definitely welcome to come on again if you like. Let us know in the comments if you enjoy Richard. Let us know if you liked me being on the show.

If not then, I won't bother again. Yeah. But next time you come on, you'll be bold. Oh, fuck I will, yeah. Yeah. Maybe you can have a hat on. He's got a motherfucking ball home here. Right. Bye, guys. Bye, guys.

Bye. Bye. We love you. Calgary, also known as the Blue Sky City. We get more sunny days than anywhere in the country. But more importantly, we're the Canadian capital of Blue Sky Thinking. This is where bold ideas meet big opportunity, where dreams become reality. Whether you're building your career or scaling your business,

Calgary is where what if turns into what's next. It's possible here in Calgary, the blue sky city. Learn more at calgaryconomic development.com.