A Lot On Your Plate - S6 Ep8: Pelvic Floors, Childhood Memories & Tinder Catfishing

Episode Date: June 17, 2025

There's a lot on our plate this week guys! We're chatting through where we've been eating and staying, plus what we've been watching and reading! Plus, Jess takes on pelvic floor therapy and we dig into forgotten childhood memories (of which Zoe seems to have none?!)... and some more brilliant petty listener stories! Remember you can sign up to Patreon for side dish episodes every week plus bonus vlog style content, competitions, group chat, early access to tickets and looooads more! See you there piggies 💖 patreon.com/ALotOnYourPlate Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Hope you had a lovely week and you enjoyed last week's episode. You learnt lots of nice new tips and you know. Now on the property ladder. Well done. Thanks to us. Welcome to your new home. I hope it brings lots of joy and happiness. We went to somewhere nice for lunch after the pod last week. So we did a wee lunch out.

We did. We went to the Noble, which was the old 60, old 60 third and first. By the way, it was lovely in there. On Baudwell Street. I fricking loved that menu. I love stuff like that. Like fish and chips. I had a fish finger sandwich.

Oh, just bash my tooth. I had a chicken Caesar salad with chicken schnitzel so it was like breaded chicken anchovies, massive croutons even had an egg on top. It was so freaking good. And that did look good actually. Massive portion, wasn't it? We also got curried hash, no, not curried, what were they again?

Salt and pepper? Salt and chili? Hash browns? Yeah, but it was like salt and chili hash browns and chicken fat, was it? God knows. It was some. like that and they were unbelievable.

If there's a harsh bruin on the menu, I'm getting it. Do you know what else I loved in there? Zoe pointed it out to me, but it's got the train times on the screen in there. I think that's so cool. I love it. Yeah, it's cool. I just think it's really nice, like, decor-wise for a bar at the weekend as well. And it's such a good location.

It's a walk out of Central and you're banging there. And then Mallow's next door, so you could head down for a wee cocky after your dinner and a few drinks. And Devils of Brooklyn's just up on the corner as well. Fucking perfect. We did a great time. We did. Very, very nice. So I recommend there, guys, if you want to go.

Definitely. Especially for lunch as well. I think what I really struggle is when people ask me, where can I go for lunch in city centre? Yeah. And I really struggle with places for that. But seriously, the menu was amazing and they had some really good lunch offers as well

if you want to go in the daytime or not peak times, basically. Perfect. I also think they're really good for breakfast because they do their square sausage, sausage roll. Pardon? So you know a sausage roll that you would get for eggs, right? Yep. But in that, it's a square sausage.

Oh. And then it's got a wee dollop of, like, brown sauce in the middle. It's like a bougie sausage roll with square sausage. Are you brown or ketchup? Oh, I'll take either. Yeah, same actually, but I am more brown. Just give me heartburn, maybe. I think I would always initially say ketchup, but every so often I'm like,

I just remembered about brown sauce, I'll take brown. Kind of forget about it. Yeah. Do you know what I mean? That's some vinegary. But I did try that when I went to the kind of open. Nighting a few months ago and it was so good and apparently their baking roll is unbelievable

but I'm not a fan of baking as you know. Yeah, you went to the opening. Love it. Was it busy? Yeah. And on a weekend they've got someone playing the piano someone singing. Yes, I saw the piano went down to the toilet. They've always got entertainment on. That's nice. Love it. That would be fun. And outdoor seating in the sunshine. I walked by the end of the day

and I saw Courtney sit out there on a laptop and I was like, look at that, what I set up. A nice wee like balcony bit, isn't it? Yeah, gorge. Anyway, fucking love it. Yeah, love it. And talking of food, we had, and we forgot, but my faves from Wheatberry Bakery, and God bless her, Cassie listens to the podcast every single week. But while she's doing the night shift, she was telling us just now, actually, she dropped off our,

if you're looking on YouTube or on Patreon, we have the famous almond croissants, and we had these new strawberry and pistachio cart. Yeah, please. It's very heavy. So I can't wait to eat these. These are freshly baked. No, I can't get over that strawberry and pistachial tart, by the way. And she starts baking.

at 9pm and they finish at 5am so it's all ready for all of their wholesale because basically wheat berry if you don't know it's it is a bakery but at the moment you can't go into there physically to buy from them but they are wholesale to all of the best bakeries in Glasgow. I think maybe in Edinburgh as well

I'm not sure. Yeah. But if you go somewhere you'll know wheatberry cross up when you see them and I said to her Large and in charge. I says I actually love your cinema knots and she said put them in the microwave for six seconds, six seconds to be precise. She went and then come back to me and tell me if you really love them.

But I also have put my Almanquassant home and put it in the air fryer for a bit and, oh my God, so it's so good, yeah. I would never think to do that. Yeah, so good. I can't stop looking at them. I know. I really wish I could eat them now, but it's triggering microphone. Also, a pastry is messy to eat. It is.

It's the one thing about it. You end up with like wee bits all up your shakes and that. Yeah, and in your tea. And it's proper flaky pastry as well. Yeah. But I think we may have mentioned this before, but this is just to reiterate, Wheatberry are now based in Morris Park, where they're actual big bakery is. And they have opened a baking school, which we need to go to.

I'm desperate to go. Cassie's been telling me about the plans for seriously a couple of years now. They'll try to find the right unit. It's so cool. And I think that's something that really misses. You know, if you're trying to kind of think of a really good gift to do with someone or even maybe like a, I don't know, like a group of girlies or like maybe a beginning of a hen party or something,

just a bit of fun, interactive. Go and learn how to make your pastry and you can make, I think it's a quasson class, or maybe it's all different classes. I think I would find out quite therapeutic. Yeah. But it's a really cool unit as well. We'll share some pictures, but yeah, definitely check that out.

And I can't wait to go with you, Zoe. No, I can't wait to go with you. Let's vlog it. I'll have a bake off and put it on Patreon. special I'm winning You are winning You're very competitive

I'm not No but I'm also So shite in the kitchen Same You can cook You're not the best baker From your mouth by the way Not mine

You've made stuff And I thought it was good Okay But I'm not really a good Baker or cooker Or anything That involves the kitchen Okay

Incorrect Although Do you know what I'm really good At making Very specifically You're scones Yes you like them

I'm really good At scones It's the one So maybe I don't know, we might be surprised by me here, I'm thinking. One second, oh my God. I was happening with him. So basically, me and Zay, I had a bit of a dilemma.

We're a bit stress and it's the weirdest thing that's ever happened. I don't understand how this has just happened to the both of us, right? So, long story short, Jason's away at the gym before I'm leaving and I'm on a tight schedule today. I've got work after this, right? And I lock the door, Jason's at the gym, but he's returning soon. to get ready for work and I turn my key in the door

and part of the key falls off so it's now stuck in the door but the door's also locked so we're locked out essentially so what we've justed to do in the journey here is phone locksmiths try and get one out ASAP Jason's obviously having a hairy canary

because I've left him to deal with it but I had no choice okay and then Richard's just text Jess saying that he's also locked out which is a freaking nightmare because all the milk's inside the house No, but how's he locked out? Please explain that.

He just said the chub on the lock. The chub is on the door. And I put, what do you mean? You put the chub on the lock, I'm locked out. I really don't understand. You should be able to still get in. And he's like, no, it needs to be put on. I don't know what he means.

That's exactly my situation. Jason's like you shouldn't have left and left this to me. And I'm like, well, I have to get to the podcast, sorry. Also, I love the fact that he's texting me that to try and stress me out. Like, why are you texting me that for something that you've done? You know I'm recording a podcast. I'm going to be stressed now. Men can't deal with things on their own.

Honestly, we can't. Anyway, moving on swiftly. Men just really struggle with stuff like that, don't they? And, like, Jason was getting so stressed with Zoe. And it's like, I just think, like, men in general, because Richie would be the same. I was like, honestly, sorry, Richard would be reacting the exact same. Like, I've had to leave. To insure their day?

Yeah. They can't bear it. But what I've also done is fix the problem. Like, the problem is going to be fixed soon. And that's from my arrangement. What's been a lot on your plate this week? A lot. Actually, the plate's full, it's overflowing.

Yeah, you've been a busy girl. My belly is full and sore. Anyway, I went to Mar Hall for an overnight. You know, I was telling you all that I was going to Mar Hall last week after the pod. Still not over it. Well, I went, and I've got a lot to tell you. Let's go.

One being, I was in a room that's bigger than my whole flat. The living room was fucking massive. I thought that was the reception that you were sending me a picture of at first. It was a sweet. I walked in and went, I gasped. And the guy looked at me and he was only the best for you and I thought, I don't know who you think I am,

but it's no who you think I am. You can't even know. Well, she stayed in that room. And then she came back to Glasgow on Friday there, right, which I don't think it was planned. I think it was like an added date. My mum was fucking raging. She was like, we should have left in a wee note or something in the room.

Oh. Like, I hadn't messaged somewhere. It had a piano in the room. But it had a piano in the room. So I got my mum playing that. obviously but she was getting us stressed out because it wasn't coming back to her very well she kept hitting wrong notes and I was trying to put up a cute video do you know what I mean I was like mom can you just fucking do this right I like stop making a mistake it's embarrassing

says me who can't play a note well I can actually play um an ursy rhyme what one is it again don't know but I can't get that right either and then we went for dinner and the restaurant it was lovely what did I have again fish of some sort mom had a steak I thought, fucking good on you, Suzanne. With some margaritas. Then we sat in the kind of bar lounge area for a while after, a few drinks. Did she live it?

Do you cook a or not? No. We did the exact same thing that we did at Crossbasket, said we were going to take cookie, changed our mind, got there and there was a dog bed, a dog bowl, dog biscuits. Then I felt shite again.

But also, she's just too young, especially being in a room like that, I would have just not been able to relax. Yeah. She'd been chewing all sorts. No, I know. We would have left her in, like, her wee creak. when we went to dinner and stuff anyway

we wouldn't just let her roam around I wouldn't even do that in the flat but even at night time like I don't know we just couldn't have chilled do you know what I wouldn't be able to enjoy it the same anyway something really funny happened well we all thought it was hysterical at the time right

so we're sitting at dinner and someone comes up with my mum's cardion obviously we're in this quite like a bougie hotel in that right so we're all like my mum's got her polite accent on and stuff phone voice yeah and it's actually so funny It's so extreme.

And I just don't say anything. Maybe I'm kidding it right now. It's more like, yes, it's so lovely here, isn't it? And I'm like, Mom, stop talking like that. But I just let it happen. I don't even say, just used to them. But she does sound like that as well. So we're sitting at dinner.

We're like her staking our wine and all that. And this guy comes up and's like, is this your cardigan? She was like, oh yes, it is. So then obviously fell out a bag. at some point, right? As none the wiser. Bearing in mind, when we walked through the sort of like reception bar area,

we had to walk back by the full licence football team. Wow. Every single one was gorgeous, right? Gorgeous. I felt they were all 10 years old, though. It was getting a young team. Oh, I just thought like Icelandic would be quite, you know, blonde.

A lot of them were tall and dark. I would say it was because... Because they were playing Scotland. Too ain't yet. We're getting dumped for long with doors anyway. so we had to walk by them and we did lose my mum in the process like me and the guy were at the lift

like where's my mum she was like excuse me excuse me like obviously having to make it everybody walking into the car oh sorry I didn't mean to rush either so the cardigan's got lost at some point right but my mum being the way she is took the cardigan off the waitress

and was like oh thank you very much all polite and then she was like she opened the cardigan looked at label And she went, it's papaya. And I was like, what's she mean papaya? She went, it's pay Matalan. And you were just pissed our shell because we're in this hotel.

She dropped her fucking car. And she was like, she went, it could be worse, I suppose. That's just her though. I'm like, you wouldn't have a fancy cardigan though. No. Like you like Matalan. Why is that a problem, Suzanne?

But it was just funny because, like, you know, when you're in a place at that, you can have maybe put your west gear on. So then they're like that with her card and she's like, she's like, it's been Matalan. And then it reminded of us of when we were in New York and we'd lost our cases. And she had the Primark Miscara.

Yeah. But you know what? See now, Sleigh, people love like Primark makeup. I know. I've never personally tried it. Not neither of her, but she's still loving it. There's some good dupes. I gave her like the mascara we like

and she said it was shite in comparison. Did she? Honestly, Fairfox, Suzanne. Fairfax. But no, that stay was unbelievable. and do you know what I actually had to look at like prices and stuff for like all the different rooms during the week at weekends and it's actually not see you can suddenly we've got a spa a nice restaurant it's on nice grounds there's a golf course yeah it's actually pretty standard prices I would say yeah for a hotel it looks like it isn't it like a 200 million pound refurb yeah something like that and by the way 20 million I think but honestly it was so nice I'd go back in a heartbeat I ended up not going to the spa because I had a bath in the morning and that big, fucking massive bath

that looks out to the golf course. Yeah, so you pick it at a gorge. Read my, a wee chapter in my book. And you've finished your book? I finished my book. I was talking to the book club girlies about it on Patreon. At the weekend, I finished the perfect son. Really enjoyed. Right. Quick overview.

It's about a family of four. Obviously, there's a son and the mum is constantly trying to keep him away from girls. because in his younger years I think he's maybe like 16 in it right I think he has 16 and his younger years he like trapped someone

in a cupboard at nursery he made he was like he was torturing like hamsters and he was obviously getting a lot of pleasure out of torture oh so you love torture books don't you fucking lot of shit like that honestly like well I tell someday one day probably

potentially Jason when you get out today today's a day but it just kind of evolves obviously he's getting older chatting to girls at school blah blah and the mum's like I must stop it so she's noticing maybe that he might be a bit

yeah and when he was younger she did take him to speak to someone I'm sure and I think they'd said like it's kind of like sociopath behaviour so she's obviously trying to like protect him from that behaviour but I mean there's only so much you can do as like a teenage son isn't there

sounds good so all kind of like comes from that yeah and then there's a story obviously with a girl involved. Okay. But then there's a twist as always. It was good. It was Andrew Weakroft that posted it. They encouraged me to read it.

Right. So I then asked in the booked and busy chat of what I should read next because I feel like I've ticked off the list of when I've asked before for recommendations. So anyway, a few of people said when we were killers, which is Erpaal Shiv's book club book this month. All right.

Okay, cool. Then American Dirt. Yes, I've heard. That's brilliant. Have you met? might read that one or other ones from Frieda McFadden which is who wrote the perfect son I like her books so the tenants apparently good and the teacher

is also good do you know what sounded interesting me though rock paper scissors but that's very dark yes or anyone who loves crime thrillers must read this book big statement possibly my favourite book of all time and it's the only one left by Riley Sager See, I love crime thrillers I love crime thrillers TV as well Yeah, same

Somebody was actually telling me to watch Department Q on Netflix Who was that? Oh it was Jack actually Jack Baxter He was saying it's brilliant It's actually based in Scotland I'm sure But he said it's like 10 episodes Really freaking good

It's out on Netflix right now So I'm going to definitely try and get stuck into that Because there's so much good TV at the moment No, there is But it all comes at once It's overwhelming and I watch nothing And did you watch the Wicked 2 trailer Yeah, I loved it.

Thoughts? My stomach's going well. I just love it. I really liked it. It's getting quite a much. And you know what I'm going to tell you right now? Quite a big statement. Go. See, when I first watched it, I was still very pro the show. Yeah.

Like, I thought the music and the show versus the film was so much more powerful, blah, blah, blah. Your musical geek vibes, right? But see, now that I've been listened to the film soundtrack so much. You love that now. I think it's better. Yeah. I think it's because, you know, how, since. Cynthia, who plays Elphaba, does like the big mass of, like, she makes it fancier.

I like the thing people didn't like. But see, even though people don't like it, because it's not the way it should be essentially right. People have that might change. Yeah, but now that she's kind of made it like a bit more fancy, when you hear the one before. It's weak. Yeah, it is a bit. You're like, bit. It is actually a bit.

Yeah. So I'm excited for it. I think we do like a wicked party. we should I fucking love it a year later isn't it November something yeah fucking love it

what else Ginny and Georgia is out again now you've started that I've not and Love Island is back and have you watched something called Virgin Island

no but I've seen a lot about it yeah I just don't know why we're going on that and omitting to that are the American are they from the UK I think it's a mix but also it's all people

like it's proper fears of sex or anything that would lead to that Right So like I think some people For example Maybe have a fear of like Saliva mixing

You Me but obviously I got over at my own age So I think it's like as little as that But obviously when I way like that Yeah but it's like I think they actually need like therapy to like Right okay But the people on the show I'm sure

Some of them would actually Like almost do it with you so if you were going to try and have sex with someone I think they're like kind of involved so there's like a third person oh like the therapist is in about it as well so obviously make the magic happen right oh

so I'm sort of instigate it yeah I think so because it's fears people are having to get over and see also I think if you got to an age there's a certain age that if you hadn't done it by in my opinion say like early 20s right that you would just be scared of it Like you've gone too long without kind of like getting

like break nice of Yeah Jagging or even a kiss Yeah And then you'll be building it up on your head Yeah Added pressure from within

I do think that as well at school Because I was always called So Fridid at school Because I was one of the last people In my group to have a snog And I hated it I felt so pressured And everyone would be like

Oh you're such a fridge freezer And then when you do it It's like woo Everyone's real gone about it It makes it a big deal Yeah It's the pressure From other people around you

For example people pressure them to probably go on this TV show. No, I know. Everyone knows you're aversion. There's no way you're admitting that. How the hell? How the hell do they find those people? I need to know.

Nobody admits it. They say they shouts somebody at their granny's caravan. That's what happens. Like, you just say you have. If you're not. Or you kissed your first girl later, your granny's caravan. I think, fear of folks.

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It's also me and Jason's, as you say, Jason and I, that's the correct English. That makes me feel really posh, though. Like the king and I. Yeah, it's not the king. So a five-year anniversary on Friday, five years. Wow, five years. Yeah, asked me how I felt about it.

other day and I said surprise and relieved and he was like oh yeah and I was like well I just that's a long time by the way it is a long time that's like a near less sixth of my life and then if you make it past a seven year blip then you thrive in sis just to let you know it's coming the blip's on its way just to let you know it's coming I think the blips being gone a good few times let's hope I just think that's relationships for you to be honest but we're going to celebrate on Friday by going to Don Costanzo. Classic. A wee Italian, why not? Can he beat it? Can he beat it? But we're going to go on overnight, but you know what? It's just not worth the money in my opinion.

So expensive. Especially when we've got holidays and that coming up. I'm like, we're going away. Yeah. Like we don't need a wee overnight, you know? Like 400 quid for a Friday night somewhere. I'm sorry, no. I like my flat. I'll stay there.

Yeah, exactly. And that's like a whole month of your fucking mortgage. Also, you could go on holiday for that. maybe no flights these days but you could like do an experience for that maybe even just down to Manchester or something for that whole price of one night down the road I honestly think though with flights and it's getting ridiculous like right there and all that it's honestly a piss take because you would look at a flight you'd like oh my god a flight to let's say Dublin is 60 quid yeah maybe not Dublin because you could just do that in overnight but somewhere a bit further afield right then you add on all the extra things

because then you add on a little bit of a luggage because you only get that tiny handbag. And it's like, what the actual fuck? Now it's 300 quid. No, I know. Then you add a kid on, which by the way is not free. People lie to me.

Children are don't fly free. Yeah, what's the deal with that? He was 25 quid each way. And then you do get free bits, two pieces of luggage free with him. Like you get your stroller and you get a travel car seat or something. Yeah, but we're now like making that

as if it's like a bonus when really like... But you know what the catch is? What are you carrying your show again? You have to book a seat. So I get a free seat with Jensen, but the person on your booking then has to buy their seat. Obviously, you're buying a seat right up the front for a bit of extra leg room

or something to make it your journey bit smoother. Yeah. For them to sit next to you, it's probably like 25 quid each way. So it's an extra fee. Honestly, it really backs up. That's crazy. So that our flights to Kefalonia, although we've got quite a good deal for the week,

we're at ridiculous. And it was Jet 2 as well, which I do love Jet 2. And the good thing with that was you do get your hand luggage, but I booked a big suitcase. They don't include the cases now, though. They do a little wheelie. No, but you used to get your check-in case in your price.

Oh, no, you don't get that now. You don't get that now? Only if it's like a package, I think. Very rarely you get that anymore. No, but they did it for a while after other people, yeah. Did they? Yeah, I would say up until a couple years ago. But Jet 2 are probably one of the only ones now

that are like short-distance flights that allow you to have the 10-KG wheel in. Yeah. Anyway. But it is fucking annoying. Talking about Father's Day. So Father's Day, we'll have got. my time this has come out, but I did what you said.

Did you, right? So I messaged Richard's tattoo artist and I just said, I want, this is my, I think I said 50 quid, tell what can you do for 50 pounds, just something really small and then I'll pop it in a card. And what I've also done, which is really cute, is of Amazon, I've bought, like, baby-friendly, like, ink and pet-friendly ink.

I've seen the pet one all over TikTok then I. Oh, have you? Yeah. To get a hand, to get a... Poor plan. I've not seen it on TikTok. I just wanted to get one for Jensen, but I thought, you know what?

I'm going to do a father's day card. I'm going to actually make one. So I bought some, like, craft paper of Amazon, and I've got, like, a pink and a blue ink pad. Yeah. They're suitable for both baby and pets. And I'm going to use Jensen's hand. Yeah.

And then two paws. And then I'll get Jensen's a pen in his hand, and I'll just get him together. I just... Like, hope I was there. That's what it says. How cute? He'll love that.

Jensen wrote that. And then inside will be the printout of the little tattoo that I've got him. by the way. He will, aren't it? Yeah. So thanks for the tip. That was great. And, yes, I went to the late district this week.

It was really cute. I went, Richard did a fitness event down in Allswater called District L. CrossFit. Met a few pod. Piggy's there. Hi. It was really, really fun. I would say it was a bit like a CrossFit festival, if you like.

Right. I spent minimal time there. I was going to see how was that. But actually, it was really nice. I do think with CrossFit is right. They do get a bit of stick, mostly from me. But I do think, even though I participated in it one time, but I felt like it wasn't very like cross-fitty gym.

Yeah. But I do feel that they're really decent people. And that's one thing that I will say, that they're all just good eggs. I think when you're not in something you call it a cult, right? Yeah. But when you're in it, you would say it's more like a community. Correct.

I don't know. I just think everyone is proper sounds. Yeah. They're probably similar ages to me, maybe a bit older. There was lots of dogs there, lots of kids. Everyone had tents. It was okay weather.

It was a bit hit and miss. The scenery was gorgeous. And again, everyone's just doing fitness as food vans. There's music, big DJ. It was quite good. So I definitely recommend that if you're into that. Have a look at that. It's in the late district every year.

But I stayed, I got a PR stay actually, at a really gorgeous hotel called Another Place. Anyone that's listening that's been, you'll know. It's really nice. I actually got put up in a shepherd's hut, which were probably some of the best kidded out huts that I've been in. Kipp and Nook were incredible. Different gravy, though.

And it's on the lakes. The food was nice. I would say the customer service wasn't excellent. I thought it was quite hit and miss. I do feel like with hospitality right, you could never be too over the top. I do think if you walked into a hotel and somebody was a bit in your face like, hi welcome yeah you might think all right whoa but you're never going to walk away and say that the service was bad so yeah you just notice a difference that's the only thing that i will say although

people were lovely but i just yeah i think customer service is a big thing for me the actual facilities were excellent the kids crushed there rick jensen wasn't old enough but you have to be six months old to go in them but it was like offstead approved and they also do this thing called forest teaching which is now sponsored by land rover and they're building them this big massive hut where they'll learn to like make fires climb trees like proper cool really cool and they said that I could have a little look because obviously I wanted to take some content when the kids went in and they said that they do like breakfast until half ten

and the kids sessions start from quarter past nine you could literally put them in there all day if you wanted to and they love it bye yeah see ya so it's like two hour sessions a time like four times a day but then you can put them in at quarter past nine and you can go and enjoy you a peaceful breakfast until 10 so give them breakfast first drop them off walk back go and get your breakfast breakfast was excellent Yeah, so I really recommend it I would say it was quite pricey

Obviously I didn't pay for it I got it for free in exchange for some content And my honest opinion But I do think when I'm looking at the Shepard Hook It was pricey For the two nights So do bear that in mind But it is probably one of the nicest locations

And they also have a hotel in Isla In Scotland So it's the same hotel Another place in Isla Another place in the Lake District And their sister hotel Is the Watergate Bay down in Cornwall Which I'm desperate to say

Yeah. Desper, desperate. I want this mission, right, to start trying to stay in some places that are still suitable for me, whilst Jensen's still two and he's technically free, that is still nice for adults, but also suitable for children as well. So I'm on a mission to try and find these places. If you like me, stay tuned. Yeah, because you don't want to, even if somewhere allows kids, but say it's really quite nice or a bit fancy. Yeah. Yeah, you're allowed kids, but if Jensen started crying, for example, You don't want to feel like, oh my God, everyone's like staring and it's a bit too fancy, fancy.

Yeah, you need it to be nice but family friendly enough that you feel comfortable there. Exactly. And like I said, having that crush there. Yeah. And it was so good. They also had, it wasn't just a crush, sorry, you could have them up until I think they were 12. So there was a thing called the den and it was like a big outdoor room, big bean bags, snooker, pool tables, ice rink thing, big TV for movies. It was really nice.

that's like a bogey version of when you go on your trip when you're leaving primary school and you go away and you do like your canoeing and all that shit I love that I think I went to Wales where did you go? I don't know I can't mind I really can't remember what it's called that was the last time I went to Wales I think Knightswood was it called Knightswood

unsure but then see when I went to high school they did another version of that when we were in I think it was like third or fourth year's maybe we were like 14 15 yeah and like me like all All our girl group, all our boy group were basically the only ones that went and it was the same thing, but obviously you were older, all sneaking out in each other rooms at night, like staying up and everything, it was well fun.

I love that. I think I was like, yeah, six, yeah, six, maybe then. Yeah, you would be like, 12 before you go to, like, high school. What about, did you ever go on a ski trip with school? I did that. No, I didn't, but I did ski lessons. And that feels really, really, bougie now. Boogey, but it wasn't at all.

I think that is quite common for schools, though. Yeah. I don't do any ski trips, me and my pals did ski lessons, like every week in one of our years at school. Oh, yeah. Talking of Wales, have you ever been? That's so random, but I can't believe I've never been to Wales.

You just said you went to school trips? Yes. First and last time, like, I've not been as an adult. No, I've not been to Cardiff. No, I've not. What if you've got any Welsh listeners? Say hi if you're Welsh. Yeah, say hi.

I've been the same as you, like when I was a kid with, like, my dad and all our family on his side to like a caravan park and it took us about 10 hours to get there driving. Oh my god. I'm sure it's meant to be something like eight but we took a wrong turn at some point and it just made it even longer and it was so long. I was driving back from England someplace where you have to sort of like dib in and out of Wales and I remember seeing all the road signs and I was like where the fuck am I because it's obviously all the signs are in Welsh. Right okay yeah mm-hmm and I was like what an earth well it's just But it's mad doubt to me that we live so close to something.

It's technically. But we're so close yet so far from Wales I feel. Also I went and had my mummy MOT with Rosie Davis, pelvic floor specialist. Honestly, it's been a while since I've had somebody inside me and now told me to cough. In fact, that's never happened. And I was like, okay, we're really doing this. But she just made everything feel so relaxed. and it wasn't weird at all.

Yeah, I mean, that's where they're for, isn't it? Yeah, totally. But she, not even if you've had a baby, she does, she kept saying to me, Zoe needs to come and see me. She said it's very important that you go and see her, by the way. But, yeah, I cannot recommend to you enough. It was about a 90-minute session. This is not an ad, by the way.

I paid for it, fully, and it was definitely worth it. I've basically been struggling. Even though I didn't push Jensen out of me, he was still stuck very much down there. I was seven centimeters. So his head was also swollen. So I felt like a bit of a pulsating, like pain down there. Also did in pregnancy, I had something called pelvic girdle pain,

which I didn't really realize until the very end, which is my fault. I should have seen her whilst I was pregnant to try and prevent this, whatever. But anyway, so the right side of my pubic bone, it really hurts me. I get this, like, pulsing feeling. I really hurt. Like, if you notice on the podcast and you watch, I'm constantly flicking my legs across. I shouldn't be crossing my legs but as I'm on a podcast

I don't want to be sitting in like this so it's a hard one You just naturally do it don't you? She kept telling me she was like Stop crossing your legs Even when I was putting my legs straight on the bed I had my feet cross at the end She was like can you stop that?

Yeah I would do that too It's a habit But you feel about kind of like Flung open if you lie in the other way Because it's like a smear When they put your feet together And you drop and then I know we don't love it

But listen it's all for the good It's all important Yeah so she then she put the fingers in just pelvic floor level and pushing it to the left and the right and she's like right and had to have to picture like a lot of things like flower opening and up and it's really difficult to try and switch on your your pelvic floor I guess because you know what you see on TikTok where they're like when you sit on the toilet and go for a wee do it 10 times you just squeeze out squeeze out and we're all tight in our pelvic floor I've never done anything like that do you pee when you skip

if you ever had a skipping rate would you pee no oh I see I would if I try to do something called double unders you know where you try and like you used to do a lot in like crossfit if I ever got that rhythm right so I could skip normally fine if I managed to do it where it was like maybe I was concentrating too much it would be free flow pee no that wouldn't happen to me what's just strange or trampoline or laughing yeah so she said to me she doesn't feel like most of this is due to the childbirth it's it's happened before this hasn't helped um so I've got a big program to do with her that I'm doing with Richard so I've sent Richard the program and he's going to incorporate that in my personal training with him so yeah hopefully it can get a bit better get

better but I went for my first outdoor run I was just telling you this before the pod I gave myself a goal I really said to you I was really looking forward to going on my run getting my head friends in I charge my head fins for the first time in about a year love it I can't believe I've never had them in I didn't have them fuckers out of me here and popped it in the canceling I thought right Just run for 30 minutes. I didn't even put a sports bar on, which was a schoolboy era, because these tiddies are massive black eyes.

I don't know how you fed with kids have done that. I had like a tight top on, but it wasn't tight enough. Yeah, so they weren't like flanging about, but they were moving. Yeah, it wasn't comfortable. It was movement. So 30 minutes, out. Once I get to 50 minutes, turn back.

Richard walked behind me on the pram. He was like, go, Mama. I was like, this is so cringe. And, yeah, managed a decent distance. I mean, I think it was like four points, something, but I really didn't care about that. I wasn't even bothered. Not just to not stop for 30 minutes.

But bear in mind like, so that was 30 minutes, bear in mind like back in the last year I was running 5K in 25 minutes. So I've got some work to go but for me that the goal was no pressure on time, distance and honestly although it was the slowest I've ever ran it was the best I've ever fucking felt.

Seriously. I took it dead slow though. Like dead slow. I think that's a big achievement. Me too. I was so proud of myself for just not stopping. I'm not even getting on it again, but it's so difficult. And it's quite uphill.

The route that I do is a little bit uphill. I didn't do the whole loop. I just went up and then back. Yeah. So I got a good downhill run. On the way back. I also dropped into a nursery to try and get a scope. But they were doing their graduation.

I could see all the balloons flying up in the air. So I couldn't go in. But I've took their number. So I'll keep you all updating on that. But I'm hoping to get Jensen into a nursery when he's like between 10 and 12 months just for one day a week. So yeah, that's my update, really. Jensen's doing really well.

He's nearly four months now when this comes out. He's found his feet. He's blowing raspberries. He's not laughed just yet, but he's making a noise. Fuck, he's a laugh. Come on. We're funny. I just think he's coming on leaps and bounds.

I'm so proud of him. He's just a clever little man. And he is happy. Oh, he's so much happier. So much happier, guys. He's always smiling for the camera. Yeah, he is. But all I do is go, hi.

I go hi I took that picture that I put my close friends where he's in his new swimming costume and I just says are you excited to be in your new swimming costume and he just went wow this kid loves water

I know this is a silly thing to say right but can they hear properly straight away they have all the tests in the hospital and he passed all those so I'm guessing so but I wonder if it develops yeah it must do with age because do you think that's why

they do start to show emotion because they can hear tones because you're saying like hi he might not react but if I go hi he looks at my face though I think if I walk in

like in the morning every morning I'll look at him and I'll smile I'll go I'll smile and then he just goes even if I smile at him and we'll smile back

I wonder if my face is like frowning frowning he would just be looking at me confused I've got a question to ask you and all listens at actually, because we and Rich, we were on a walk. And he said to me, you know the rain cover on a pram?

Yeah. He says he feels like he loves when rain hits the window. Yeah. Because he remembers when he was in a pram and he had that cover. And I was like, no chance. He's like, I do. It's like, I vaguely remember ever been in the pram. Do you?

And I said, no. I said, my earliest memory was definitely when I was around one and two because it was in a house that my mum says I was in only until I was like 18 months to-ish, which is the weirdest thing is that I've only got one small memory of my dad putting in Sonic the hedgehog game into a Nintendo thing and me waiting watching him push it in what's your earliest memory honestly I don't remember anything do you remember being at nursery do you remember being at like child minders or do you remember your first day at school I remember that no really that's so interesting I don't remember a nursery before school I don't

remember my first day of school. I could probably remember the odd thing from primary school but I would say it was like my last year of primary school. Interesting. I remember going to an after school club which I went to every day until like I could be picked up by my mum or dad

or whatever. I remember being there very briefly but I don't know if it's because someone's told me the story. Do you know what I mean? You don't really know like dad remember it or do I remember it because you've told me about it? Yeah. Because I was stealing dummies they had like a box of dummies for children but I didn't have a dummy as a baby

so I started stealing them when I was like in early years of primary school and hide them under my pillow at home so I remember that but I don't know if it's because I've been told about it. Been told that yeah you actually remember that's why I think it's so important to take pictures because even as we're older as an adult for us to live back on us

we're like I don't remember that there's so many things you've said to me and I'm like I don't remember that where were we with and I weirdly remember details about like if you told me something I would probably never forget it Yeah. If you know what I mean? Like you'll tell me you're up to something

and I would never forget that. No, you're good about that. I'm terrible. I'm like a sieve. But it's more like, I think years of my life are disappearing in my brain. There's only so much room you can make up there. No, I know.

I don't remember a lot of family holidays, visits to caravans. Like my dad and all that will talk about it loads and I'm like, I have no recollection of that. But I'm like, are they just all in one? I don't know. Because it is true. If you actually think about your brain

genuinely is like a what are they called what are they called Murray filing cabinet no the things that you put in hard drive like a hard drive right that is what it's like so surely there's only so much space

that can make room for so many things surely I'm not because when I spoke to my mum's pal about like feeling anxious of like the claustophobia with travelling thing she was explaining like you do actually have your brain is split into parts you've got like a negative line positive

and she's like you're filling your negative which is full so all you're thinking is negative thoughts got it like it is all actually very scientific I mean it's like a baby brain which I'm experiencing massively apparently there's a part of your brain that dies when you give birth to make room for the more like attentive risk assessment sort of thing as motherhood brings because you're constantly on edge and caring for somebody else

but it stops your memory a brain specialist Yes, I would love that That'd be cool as fuck by the way To understand how the brain works Anyone know anyone Anyone Right I've got an absolutely Brilliant

Payback story with an ex Payback, okay I'm here for this We're getting so many coming in still It's still coming in Send them in I have a good story I knew my ex was cheating on me And calling him out wasn't good enough

I had to catch him the act yes i knew he was on tinder but he'd blocked my phone number and my friend's phone numbers so it was pretty impossible to find him i used my works phone and created an account needed to use picks of a pretty girl and thought it can't be someone in glasgow so i went onto a club in newcastle's instagram page and went through their likes on the posts until i found a girl i thought he'd be into i screensotted her picks sorry to the girl and made a tinder account drove to near his house so he would come up and swiped. Lo and behold, he matched.

He messaged almost instantly, and within an hour, I'd given him an address to come and fuck. Oh my goodness. Not the fuck. I panicked and used the address of my lash girl. He lived quite far away, so this was a good hours drive, quite a commitment from him. Fucking hell.

He had to drive by my actual house en route. I watched on Tinder as a location got smaller and smaller, and jumped in my car when he was. near my house. I spotted him. I followed him to the lash bar. Watched as he messaged this Tinder account, I'm here. Made him sweat and gave it a good 30 minutes and chapped on his window. It was around 1am at this point. He tried to tell me that he was buying GHDs on Facebook Marketplace for his sister. Safe to say, the relationship was over from there. I never actually admitted to being Amy on Tinder and I don't think he was smart enough to ever

realize he was catfished. Good times. Thanks, Newcastle Girl. picks Slade. By the way, that is so clever. So clever. Like the thought that goes into that. But the fact that he never even switched on when she chapped his door like, hey, at 1am. Dumbass.

No, I know, by the way. But I'd be like, why the fuck are you here? Love it. Fucking love it. Right, last one. We've got a little bit of a dilemma. Do you want to read it, Zos? Hey, gals, I have a dilemma for you.

A mother-in-law won at that. Oh, right. Came home from work to find her in the house. I share with my boyfriend and she had took it upon herself to redecorate my living room. She painted the walls a colour we did not want

and she binned my couch. Our couch was the comfest couch ever we loved it. She was beige and beautiful. We sat for a week couchless sitting on dining room chairs as she had sorted as another one. A week later in the most hideous

crushed velvet couch arrives. I hated crushed velvet when it was a trend and I hate it now. So to see that that was actually gut wrenching. We've barely spoke since happened a year ago. Apparently I'm overreacting. She's basically snuck in, hired her man with a van and done a fucking 60 minute

makeover in my living room which I now hate. However, we are currently waiting on our brand new couch and the living room's being changed to what we actually like and the locks will be getting changed just in case. Sorry, that is quite frankly unacceptable. Completely unacceptable Monster-in-law. That, you can't do that?

You can't. You cannot. Listen, that's only acceptable when you are a kid and you're going on a trip and you come back in your room as you're redecorated not as an adult you can't do that why does the mum want to do that like is she not got her own shit to be doing do you not have a life you can't have just been somebody's couch and paint the walls imagine no I don't think you're overreacting at all like I think that's honestly that's a dumpable offence of the man yeah I think your mom's annoyed me so much that you're out as well has she constantly told the mum that she's not like in a living room or something and

she's trying to do a good deal and thought you know what I'll pay you because she must have paid for this new sofa right which isn't going to be cheap so she's bought them a new sofa she's probably thought she's doing a good deed surely they must have indicated that they hate their living room and they can't afford it

so she thought she would do it but even at that to come home from work to find her in the house already doing it she's obviously not even knowing that I'd lose my mind I actually can't even tell you

what I would do in that situation I think I'd be speechless I don't I'm not even one for really thinking parents should have keys. Yeah. I think someone having keys. If you had a pet, then fair. Yeah, like, I know what do people do it more so for if I lose my keys or if something had to happen.

But people do give keys to parents so that they can kind of like, come any time, I'm not here for that. Yeah. I don't think you should be able to come to my house any time you want. No, I agree. I think that's a bit much. But that is fucking wild to me. Let us know what you think. Let us know.

Has anybody done this to you? Please. It's only acceptable if someone said, I know you're really wanting a new couch or whatever, I'll give you the money. Pick what you want and I'll order it. You don't do it for them. You don't make the decisions.

No, I'm not over that. Let's do an episode of Monster In Laws. Right, well, I think that's us for this week. Yay. Patreon time for us. Yes, we've got another dilemma and another really funny cheating story. So see you over there, guys.

Thanks for listening watching. We love you. Love you. Bye!