A Lot On Your Plate - Side Dish: Meeting with an ex

Episode Date: September 8, 2023

This week on Side Dish we discuss what’s been a lot on your plate! With two juicy dilemmas, we share what we would do in your shoes…enjoy!🫶🏼 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Happy Friday, fuckers. You're like getting your chest. It's like, like, this. Happy Friday, lovely people. How are you? Hope you had a lovely, fantastic week and you're excited for your weekend ahead and you're having a nice little hot girl walk.

Nice quick 20 minutes listening to your two favorite people in the world plus G. we have a big dilemma someone has got a lot on their plate we do it and we're just going to get right fucking in it and it's a long one guy you want you to all stay tuned right the pressure of reading this out well

yeah so I need enthusiasm come on it's like a solo talk at school do you mind that yeah anyway hey girls absolutely love the pod looking for your input in this so I'm in a long distance relationship we live two hours away from each other I'm the only one who drives so she would occasionally get the train, which takes hours.

Anyway, long story short, my girlfriend has been a little off with me a few months ago. For the past two years of a relationship, her ex-girlfriend has tried to message, email, follow her on social media from time to time, asking things like if she misses her, if it was the right girl, wrong time, etc., which I don't think has been fair on me at all. I was ill one week and off work,

texts my girlfriend back and forth, and she randomly brings up she's going to the beach with said ex. I obviously am like, what the fucking fuck? Where has this came from? She then hits out with, oh, I've been speaking to X's name again. I asked why she hasn't told me this, and she said it just didn't seem the right time. We met a few days later, went in a nice walk and had a barbecue on the beach. I brought up the X thing and asked if she'd met her yet, because I told her previously I wasn't happy or keen about this.

She said absolutely not. I would never meet her without clearing it past due, I promise, swearing your life, etc, etc. I asked and begged for the truth countless times. She denied it. Fast forward a week or so. I'm at hers. Can't shift the feeling she's met her and spoke to her more than. she was telling me.

Anyway, I went on her phone while she was asleep. Oh. Turns out she met her twice behind my back. Lied to me and swore on my life. That is important. Wow.

Never just that. They were calling each other every day, FaceTime and the Snapchat and when she knew I wasn't happy about it and she continued to do it. She then lied to me about meeting her. She said she didn't. To top it all off,

I accidentally unfollowed the bitch X on my girlfriend's TikTok. Panicked and followed her back again. Big mistake. because she then got the notification that my girlfriend followed her again in TikTok so in the morning messaged a screenshot of when my girlfriend actually me supposedly followed her again said the ex-messing my girlfriend and was like what the fuck's going on here

okay and then wait my girlfriend up say you's of me etc she denied it all I said no I know the truth cut the bullshit she said you went on my phone didn't you she said met her once I said you promise she said I swear it was only once I basically said tell me of the truth and gave her a good half an hour to come clean again. Snooping on her phone again, I noticed she'd been texting another ex. Right. This girl needs to get to fuck.

I'm sorry. I cannot. So basically what's happened here is the girls lied to her, said she would never meet her again, wouldn't do that to her, blah, blah, blah, but then she found out... But she has done twice, but all this stuff about her, and wants to know

our opinion on it and if it's a dumpable offence. And all I can see as abs fucking look like it's a dump all the fence honey bunny bunny

honey honey that girl needs to get so far to fuck you need to understand your worth not only if she can be messaging the ex

line I could understand people becoming some sort of like having some sort of friendship with an ex depending on the situation I can understand

but not lying to you meeting with her twice and then meeting another girlfriend another ex girlfriend sorry or speaking to another ex girlfriend and then

if supposedly it was, I know it was the girl that unfollowed her in TikTok, the actual girl that's speaking right now. Yeah. But why is the other person so angry that she would have been followed and followed again? Like, it's an ex, why they're so bothered?

So, something else is going on here. It's obviously a bit more than friendship. Well, I'm kind of feeling like she's living a double life. Yeah. At this point. So I don't really think you need any advice from us. I think any normal sane person here would tell you to...

I know. I also think because it's a long distance thing. I know that doesn't get away a bit more. Yeah, I know that doesn't mean that everyone who's in a long distance relationship is up no good, but I think this girl is just like having you in its suits and having them in it suits. Like it's Steven's Berry, like she's involved in more than one situation. Exactly. And I think what you'll find now as well, if you do actually get the courage to Dumper and be alone, you'll find that she will come crawling back to you and she won't even be interested because the excitement's not there for anymore

living this double life so yeah I just think you're worth a lot more than that you don't deserve to be someone's second best so get her to fuck absolutely very inspirational anyway next before I go into this this M-I-L-S-I-L thing

from mother-in-law and sister it gets me every time I don't I don't click on to it fast ever really I don't know what it is I don't know if it's because I've never used the language myself, you know? It seemed to be fair. Anyway, me and my sister-in-law

do not like each other at all, and she keeps lying to the family and trying to slag me off over nothing. It's so frustrating because none of what she says is true. I feel like I can't stand up for myself, because I just don't want to create drama in the family, so I just sit and take it and answer the truth to the family when she's not there.

I know I need to grow up here, and I'm trying to set boundaries, but it's so hard. Yeah, and I mean, I can sit here all day. We all can, and sit here and say, oh, just stand up for yourself. tell her how it is but you know when you are in that situation I'm someone that hates confrontation especially when it comes to families or your partner's family it is just awkward no matter what you're saying you have to be a different kind of ballsy person stand up for yourself when it comes

to that um so I understand you're paying and I feel for you but if she's going around lying to you and making your life difficult is only eventually going to come in between you and your partner and if what is she saying is absolutely not true then you do need to set the boundaries and maybe you should give her a text what I would do is possibly give her a text or just say listen is there some sort of like issue here

can we meet for a drink or can we just catch up and go for a walk and just talk things through because surely that girl can't even be asked to give all this energy as well surely she wants to be friends with her sister-in-law as well why would she want to make this constant drama between her brother and the girlfriend? obviously like jealousy between someone here well it sounds like it's the sister

yeah so if it was me now I would like to think that I would be brave enough to just ask her to I don't know you don't know this person she might seem she might be really um intimidating but I would ask her just to have a catch up or maybe if you're next time you're having a few drinks or just say listen go in one room and be like can we just iron this out this feels a bit hostile and I think think that you're worried to do it because you don't want it to cause issues within the family but if you go directly to her then it you're cooking out all the shit mature adults then it shouldn't really cause issues from the family do you know what I mean

because that doesn't involve anyone else really yeah if you just deal with it the both of you a lot of people do have issues be like in-laws don't they so much so many issues of in laws and but then see really you're like you're not really choosing to be people that get along in a sense it's only one person that's bringing these to that different families together yeah so i do think people probably maybe like overthink it and make it like a deeper issue but it's like you don't get along with everyone in other group settings you're not going to get along with every single person someone's family yeah you might but you might not and you should you just

kind of need you go over it like do you know what i mean by that and i wonder why the boyfriend as well i know she probably doesn't want to get him involved because it's his family he's maybe really close to his sister or whatever but i wonder if she speaks to him and just says like can you have aware with your sister and find out I suppose we don't really know the background do because they're saying there's some lying going on or try that first at least yeah, nothing comes up. Is even aware of it?

Guys being guys might be like I can't be bothered with this G's like yep I was watching you as I said that and he made his survivors yeah like I just always like you deal with it's not my problem

yeah you know true very very true so yeah we hope you get that one sorted because that is an awkward one You don't want it to come in between your relationship either And you want to keep the peace But you also don't let anyone walk all over you And start making it bullshit about you

Because that is just not okay And it's quite an intense one Because you don't want then the family Thinking any of this stuff's true If you're just lying about Whatever she's lying about Exactly So yeah

Go to the cause itself And try to the root of the problem The root of the problem The core of the apple Is that a saying? Because it should be. Don't know but it is now. Thank you.

Any more? No. No? Well, that's the two of good ones we've got, but we also wanted to discuss Cruel Summer. Oh, yes. We do have a little TV series

to tell you about that we are loving. And if you're not watching it, you need to watch it, because it's very, we've followed on to this, well, you actually found it, but from the summer at Unprety.

On Amazon Prime. And it's kind of... Like that sort of teenage drama thing. Do you think it's quite like mean girlsy? Yeah, kind of, but it's got a thriller side to it. Yep, which I love. So it's a bit, that makes it a bit more adult, I would say. Yeah, there's two seasons.

We both watching the first season, Zoe finished it last night. I was up to half one in the morning watching it, which is very out of character for me, but I was hooked. Hooked? So hooked. So I would really recommend. I feel like I can't really discuss much. No, you can't.

I don't want to give away any spoilers but I just love a wee twist you know If you like some right time pretty This is a bit more I would say slightly older Thriller vibes Who done it A bit of me and girls here and there

High school Really good Yeah So yeah we're both watching that And we really like that Is it anything else that you've loved recently That you've bought anything excited If I be through or what?

Not really you know I can't put anything new I actually managed to Make up outfits out of most of the stuff I got for my last holiday which I was planning doing because then, see when we're back, I'm getting cozy Yep. I'm getting the jumpers

on it out. I bought it as a pair of sunglasses actually. You did. I've not tried them on me. Veila, Vea. But what I've said to Jess is I don't, I'm not really a glasses person, right? My nose is too big everyone say, oh.

Anyway, my nose is too big so glasses are just not for me like it's the wind situation they don't fit anyway so when we were at hers the other day I was looking through all her excesses and all that and she had like 40 pair of sunglasses so I was trying them all on

and what I was saying was it was the tinted yellow aviators yeah it was like the tinted yellow thing you know that kind of edgy cool way and I look like the I want to say mum but the the mum version of the girl in Firefly Lane you know the blonde one

she's like 60s hippie eye and the kind of big blonde hair in the glasses you actually did look like her and I did look like her so I'm hoping that these ones that Jess has packed for me won't look like that

because they're like a tinted brown lens if anyone's seen them on Instagram you'll know it's I think it's an Australian brand but it's V-E-H-L-A I had a pair about a year ago maybe two years and I've lost them shock

so when I was online the day I thought I'll buy them they're about over 150 quid a pair so I was like fuck sake but really one of them again but it was buy one get one free which I've never ever seen and I was like, holy moly.

So I picked myself a pair, and I was a good friend, and picked Zoe a pair. Very nice. So hopefully she likes some, because they are a little bit fire, fly, flyny. Plainee? Flat, flat, flaney. If there's anywhere, you can, you know, tap into that wee extra.

It's Ibiza. But as Ibiza, you know, I'll just own it. I've got some bikinis arriving today, actually. Let's pray to the gods. No, Jess, Jess, so, Dan. We're sitting here right now, and it's probably going to go to my house and then not. Get left there.

Well, I'm okay. I've got to shut us. So, yeah, we best go there. Best crack on. It's going to pack. How that we get to... Ibiza. Can't it wait?

We'll see you all when we're a shell of ourselves. Yes. See you next Tuesday. Oh, oh, oh, boy, oh, boy. Bye-bye. Bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye.