A New Untold Story - 2 Inches feat. Giulio Gallarotti - A New Untold Story: Ep. 448
Episode Date: May 15, 2025giulio joins us to talk fame, commenters, panama city beach, and much more. go see giulio on the road - https://www.giuliogallarotti.com/ Ads: Gametime - Download the Gametime app today and use co...de UNTOLD for $20 off your first purchase Rocket Money - Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster at https://RocketMoney.com/untold today. Chubbies - Go to https://www.chubbiesshorts.com and use code ANUS for 20% off your order Draft Kings - Gambling Problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER. 18+ (21+ in certain states) to open, own, or access an advance deposit wagering account and resident of state where DK Horse is available. Eligibility restrictions apply. Void where prohibited. Opt-in req. Min. $5 wager. Only the first straight single horse win wager on the Preakness Stakes placed after opt-in is eligible. Wager must win to qualify for an equal share of $150,000. Reward issued in cash within 7 days of race completion via a click to claim, which expires 30 days (720 hours) after receipt. Unclaimed rewards will be forfeited. Ends at the closing of the final wagering pool for the Preakness Stakes on 5/17/25. Terms: www.dkhorse.com/bet/offers/details Sponsored by DK Horse Sponsored by DK. Lucy - Get LUCY shipped straight to your door. Visit LUCY.CO/ANUS and use promo code ANUS to get 20% off your first order. Subscribe for another 15% off & shipping’s always free!You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/anuspodcast
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Hey, a new untold story listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube.
Prime members can listen to ad free on Amazon Music. I'm a fresh baked untold story. I'm a new untold story. I'm a fresh baked untold story.
I'm a new untold story.
I'm a fresh baked untold story.
I'm a new untold story.
I'm a fresh baked untold story.
I'm a new untold story.
I'm a fresh baked untold story.
I'm a new untold story.
I'm a fresh baked untold story.
I'm a new untold story.
I'm a fresh baked untold story. I'm a new untold story. Cool, that's a nice little crass cold open
Yeah, we're talking feature pussy new told story episode 388
Join with Julia. What's up guys? Thanks for having me or join with Sergio Vincenzo
What was your line in that your Your opening line? My brothers.
I forget exactly, but it was something along the lines
that I'm trying to rally.
You said it was like a $300 job.
Dude, yeah, which is you said to me yesterday,
like, dude, how have you never told us this?
I think I associate things in my brain
with how much money I made from them.
So if I don't make a lot of money,
it's like the last thing I'm going to talk about.
You were in the best video game of the past decade.
I think I made $300 total.
Maybe the best video game of all time.. I think I made $300 total. Maybe the best video game of all time.
That's a very famous game.
Yes.
And then, were we allowed?
Do more people know you from that?
No, nobody, like, I don't think anybody knows about that.
Many people know Sergio Vicenza.
How many people played the game?
I know, I know. So this is the caveat, I think.
When I initially went in to do it,
they make you sign all this shit that scares you,
but then I'm like, bro, I made $300. What are you gonna do?
You know what I mean? Oh, yeah, but but still like I've been afraid to talk about it
But then yesterday looked up the wiki and apparently I'm like literally listed as the actor
So like I guess I'm allowed to talk about it now, but like I don't need to said you were in a mocap suit for this
Yeah
So this is like the real deal. I did mocap for that was it
I guess I'm not supposed to say but you can imagine. Yeah, isn't that funny?
Los Angeles?
Rockstar games is more secure than the CIA.
They're very secretive.
Yeah, very secretive, which I understand.
But yeah, I did this and I did some other game that I don't think ever came out or something.
I don't remember exactly.
What were your lines?
I don't remember.
And then I, like I was saying saying I may be in another rockstar game
Gee potentially
Wonder what that could be I can't believe that
Let's not speak that's the most famous thing in the world
They might they would literally if you said that the words of the game they would come through the ceiling the kid
That we can have you the not really the trailer for a possible game coming out soon
I don't think he exists. Oh, yeah, I don't think his bloodline exists. They wiped out everything. Yes
There's not even a rock star Disney are the two biggest bloodhounds when it comes to shit Nintendo to Oh Nintendo to yeah
No that and how did you get paid for that?
No, well, I think they've renegotiated the video game sag thing, but I think it's still dog shit
I'm not totally sure dude. I think that like
Traditional acting is like on the outs in general and maybe I'm just saying that because I'm a failed actor, but
Nobody's doing it, but I believe it's gone
But look like I mean dude like the best way to get in something now is by like having a popping social media
But is yeah easy like you like if you're in theft auto like you should be
paid
So if if I were to be in some sort of big game
Now this is the interesting thing they don't even they don't tell you what game you're reading for so I didn't know that
I was in this game until I saw it on IMDB. That's bizarre. So the difference is that this game,
there wasn't another version of it yet,
but perhaps it's possible that in the one I might be in,
there were references to a lineage of other games,
and the references were so specific
where I was like, huh.
Yeah, this doesn't make sense in Red Dead.
You put it together. No, but I'm saying this is for the new game. Right, no, but like was like, huh. Yeah, this doesn't make sense in Red Dead. Put it together.
No, but I'm saying this is for the new game.
Right, no, but like, yeah, right.
These are separate sessions.
Okay.
Be clear.
And then, but it was so long ago where I'm like,
is it possible that what I did then is gonna,
I know it's games taking forever to make.
If it maybe is the game we're thinking of,
which it might not be.
So that's it.
Did you have to record yourself, a sound of you getting shot?
Yeah.
I've also been shot in a thing before.
In a mocap suit?
In a TV show.
I was shot and killed.
In what show?
It's called Big Dogs.
Oh my god, everybody knows Big Dogs.
I was shot and killed. I was this like drug druggy like
This druggy fucking club going guy who's buying a bunch of drugs and I get Dylan
They were supposed to put squibs on me and they didn't and then later in the night. What are squibs?
What is that? They like explode? Oh
Yeah
And like the the director did like the most director thing she goes show me how you're gonna die I
Was like okay, miss a big shot. I was like yeah, I was like
retarded
But anyway clean don't worry okay good, but then anyway
Later in the night the the explosives guy one of the things malfunctioned
And it was like a massive explosion, and I have not been able to hear as well since oh that you should be getting paid
For that I know but I it felt it feels yucky to you know I show big dogs has to have tons of money
It was a smash hit that isn't not a good show
Cannot find it on the internet
You were in big dog big dogs, dude, shot. Dylan. I believe it's on Amazon.
You were Dylan. You were Dylan. I'm Dylan. What's your biggest role? I don't even know dude.
What? You gotta be T. Swift now. Probably have to look. Yeah the T. Swift commercial we talked about
last time you were on. T. Swift is the biggest money job. I would say that my biggest day on set of a show,
I did a scene on Bupkis with Machine Gun Kelly,
Paul Walter Hauser, Pete, Ricky...
That'll do it.
Jordan, and we were all riffing all day.
And like, whatever ended up being in it was in it,
but like, whenever I see any of those guys,
which is obviously not regularly, I'm not regularly hanging out with Machine gun Kelly. They will reference things that I said that day. No way
That is that's my biggest thing and it might just be some LA shit
But even like Paul will be like that was the funniest day of my life on set. Am I right?
Maybe you're you first name basis thing buttering me up Peter and Ricky
Oh Pete Pete because it's Pete show Pete Davidson show and Ricky. I know but it's bupkis. Is that not obvious
I wasn't trying to be coy there. Yeah, I know no that's Pete Davidson show. Yeah, yes. Yeah and and Ricky
That's my most memorable moment on
A part on a show, but like I'm barely in the show so I don't know I haven't I'm barely in all the stuff
In the stuff I'm in I've never had a significant I spent so much time trying to do it.
I'm just nodding. How many times have you died on screen once?
I've had probably 15 love scenes though, dude. What? Okay.
I was gonna ask you to how that's gonna be intimidating to try to die on screen and act that out.
But you were in 15 intimate scenes?
I've been in like 15 separate love scenes.
One of them you can pull up right now.
I'm the youngest Fok, it's called Strings.
The video might even be on IMDB.
Wait, Strings?
You were in Strings?
No way.
I believe it was selected for the
Catmandu Film Festival.
What?
What?
They call that the canopy.
And I'm like making out with this like older lady.
It's like pretty sick dude.
Strings.
Strings.
The video's gotta be on there.
I think it's like on YouTube.
You are a young man.
I'm a young man.
Oh, how are we young?
Can you go to the video?
YouTube?
Looking for it, yeah.
Did you kiss on somebody?
We were making out heavily.
How many takes?
Like too many.
This is probably, I shouldn't ask.
No, please.
Hardness?
Oh, it's happened?
There's a music video that I'm in where-
It's happened?
Dude.
It's happened?
So you were filming a sexual scene
and I guess it makes sense that you were hard.
It's a movie.
It's like a short, I don't't know who knows if Steven I'm sorry
But yeah, like you yeah, dude. You're like fucking in there
You're not like literally fucking but like if you were to like try to not you're weirder
Because it would be like I try to not I don't want to like touch you with it like you just stay hard and it
Rams her we can't find you. Yeah I don't want to touch you with it. You just stay hard and it rams her?
We can't find you.
Yeah, exactly.
But it was behind clothing, and she had clothing on?
Yeah, but fully, of course.
How did they veil it?
She could feel it.
They were making you guys look nude?
You were battering ramming?
Waste up, but on top of her and making out and shit, dude.
Were you hamming it up or?
I was trying to be realistic. Okay, but like in being realistic. Did you moan?
I don't think so, but I think it was like I think it was like like
Dude you are good
Like the first time you did it, how nervous?
Uh, it was on a prank show.
So I wasn't as nervous. Your first love scene was a prank show?
I had a ton of like prank show loves and gossips.
Was your, was the woman you were with the one getting pranked?
No, so like, I don't know if that's legal.
Yeah, right.
But that's like such a good excuse
if you hook up with a chick and regret it.
Like there's a camera right there.
There's a prank.
By the way, this is a great lesson.
See how Moog can't find anything?
I have it all.
Because I knew that one day this would happen.
I have every single thing I've ever been in on a phone.
On a physical copy.
A physical copy of every single thing I've ever been in. a phone. On a physical copy. A physical copy of every single thing I've ever been in.
Well, strings is just a hard thing to Google.
I got strings.
I have all of the things that I'm talking about.
I can maybe even, Luke, if you want me to send them
and you want to make a compilation of my love scenes,
I'd be open to that.
It might take you a long time, dude.
Oh, yeah.
That would be quite nice.
What is the... I've always been curious.
Isn't there a job on set called the intimacy coordinator?
Yes.
Yeah, the rehearsal just showed that.
Can you, like what does that sound like?
I think the intimacy coordinator is when like,
you're like in a full on like piping scene,
and like it needs to look like you're actually having sex,
then you need the intimacy coordinator
because it could just get like weird.
And I think also as time has gone on
and we found about all this weird shit in Hollywood,
I think that they wanna try their best
to avoid any predatory situations.
So I think the NBC coordinator has become
maybe more of a thing over time.
I don't know for sure though.
Have you shot any love scenes
since you've been with your current wife?
No.
Is that it, would you?
Yes. That's like the- that, would you? Yes.
That's like, that's-
Bro, it's the job.
Yeah, but I just, it would be tough for me.
Yeah, I'm trying to think.
I don't know, cause she would never,
I mean, for now, at least I don't envision a world
where she's in love scenes and stuff on screen.
And I don't know how I would feel,
but there is a big buffer that it's worked, dude. Yeah, yeah.
And it's okay to, like, enjoy it in the moment.
Would I want her to watch?
I'd be open to it if she wanted to.
I'd try to not be weird about it.
But if I'm with some, like, hot girl
and I'm supposed to be acting and, like, having a love scene,
like, I'm not gonna not do it.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
And that's not even on some shit. It's the actor the actors loophole. It was exposed by Nathan fielder
Didn't realize and the actors were
Like they were just saying they say they think they felt real emotions during it too
And they were in there like right and you're supposed to it's hard not to know
How do you but how do you just?
If you feel the emotion isn't that a problem I think so no because it's not your actual emotion
So like if you're you're in this scene and you're with this girl and you have a thing now granted
It's possible to forge some kind of connection because of it and intimacy that could be problematic
But like I don't know that's up to you to make sure it doesn't happen, but I could
Dude, there's that one significantly more mature
Usually like the sex scenes. It's like all right. They're just doing a sex scene yada yada yada everyone's professionals There's one that I saw in a movie where I was like whoa dude like you're feeling it
And that was in he's just not that into you with Bradley Cooper and Scarlett Johansson in the office scene
He goes in for a couple grabs that aren't in the script.
Yeah. And it's not even like on some like you're going too far.
Like, but and then I found out later that he was in the midst of like breaking up
with his wife. OK, he took some with Scarlett Johansson.
You could tell that if the cameras weren't rolling, he was I mean,
he took some grips, really some some some free grips.
That wasn't in the script. That was pure instinct. instinct it was like yeah, Brad. You're feeling it dude
It was crazy off to watch that too apparently also Florence Pugh like people sometimes just will just start
Going like Florence Pugh or someone like or in um?
Fucking but is it a Harry Styles Harry Styles? Oh, yes, they just started fucking they did what that's like the rumor
Oh, they were actually fucking
Yes, I don't buy it. Don't worry darling. It's a good movie. It's a movie. Yeah
But yeah, dude, like I don't know
It's just it's part of the whole thing the other thing to you about like the feeling the emotion in my opinion
After having been in scene study class and going to theater conservatory
Like I think that the best way to act is to simplify it as much as possible.
The writer just has done all the work for you.
The director's gonna set you up for success.
Don't overthink it.
Just say the things and, like, don't do too much,
and you'll do a good job.
Unless you're, like, a fucking famous actor,
and they're like, for seven months,
you need to become a dog.
Yeah, right. to become a dog.
You're the dog.
Like unless if you're not that you're they're just picking the guy who looks like the guy from the story and they're not like Rudy.
You're going to go through a transformation unless you're fucking Timothy
Chalamet becoming Bob Dylan.
Now what's your closest like what's what's the closest you've been to a role
or a role that got away?
I got I got not even that close.
I had a couple appointments for Fallen Our Stars.
Whoa. Oh, yeah.
For that. And I died in that audition, too.
Of cancer. And I have a self-tip.
It's insane. You got shot or what?
Like at the end of the movie, he dies.
Is it of cancer? Cancer. Yeah.
Oh, that's probably easier than getting violently.
Yeah, I think I can die of cancer easier
I don't know about that dude. I think that dying from getting shot is pretty straightforward. Did you practice your last breath?
Would you be on some shit
I think maybe I think I'd be like
No, the best death scene I've ever seen that was realistic was like from four brothers when the guy's yelling for his mom.
Yeah, that that's what four brothers are.
They're in private, Ryan. Oh, my God.
When they go mom mode, it's yes.
It is hard. Mom mode goes hard.
Cancer death in real time. How do you even like, what would you do?
I think I think whatever I did was super cringe for sure.
I'm going to try it.
Oh, like, I mean, the actual act of transitioning to death it. I mean it'd be hard to act because it's it's it's it's not as straightforward I don't know I picture remember Temple of Doom. Yeah, remember the beginning when?
The guy gets shot when he's trying to give the antidote and he goes he's trying to keep alive
He goes I go fast Indy and then he goes
It's like the worst thing of the antidote and he goes, he's trying to keep alive. He goes, I go fast Indy. And then he goes,
it's like the worst thing I've ever seen. That's what you do for the cancer death potentially.
You're just like, I don't know.
So anyway, it was cringe for sure and terrible.
Like my entire acting career, dude.
No, that's not true.
That's not true.
So anyway, yeah, I barely, you know,
I'm barely into a bunch of stuff and it never did anything
for me.
And, you know, I like to think that I like to think that if they put me in, I would have
done a good job.
But I actually believe that that might be true of most people who were willing to do
it and who were smart enough to just understand the idea of it.
I think it's a thing that most people can do.
It's like a craft that can be learned.
Yeah, I don't know. I don't know. I think it's a thing that most people can do. It's like a craft that can be learned. Mm-hmm. Yeah.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I can't not see the cameras right in front of me.
So, dude, when you go to, like, acting school and shit,
they make you get over all that.
Like, the embarrassment.
Not the embarrassment.
It's just, like, it's...
You're very obviously playing pretend
when there's a piece of tech six inches away from your face.
Fine, but you do this all day and you're used to this.
You know, you get used to it.
I'm hyper aware that we're being filmed.
I am too.
I am too.
Every movement.
Yeah, I never know how to sit.
Like I feel like I'm always thinking about how I'm sitting.
Dude, I had one time on the Yak where my hat was backwards
and I went to go grab my hat, Bill, to pull it down,
but my hat was backwards and I like,
just went like this in front of my face.
You whiffed on your hat? I whiffed on my hat and so I like
through the rest of the show I was trying to make it seem like it was just like there
was like a cobweb in front of me. You could probably find it I think a couple
weeks ago so I went like this and I was like I'm so uncomfortable because like
normally like I don't know it was so uncomfortable you could probably find
that. Well that's a tough one because not only are you worried about the scorn
of the viewers who will immediately let you know, they'll let you know,
but also of your peers.
Strong personalities here.
You know, I mean, like there are times where I go home after a day
he being here for the day and I think about what I've done all day.
I happened yesterday. I winked at Big Cat for some reason.
That is bad. That's bad.
That's bad. I heard about that.
People were talking. Dude, I haven't been able to stop thinking about it.
And, you know, Nick asked me to do something cool yesterday.
And I was like, when did Big Cat ask you that?
Because I wasn't sure.
I'm certain it was before that. It was pre-wink.
And I think that the offer might be rescinded.
I wouldn't. And it's not not a job offer just so everybody knows
Yeah, yeah, but but yeah, so it might I there might be no coming back from that. A wink is brutal
Wink is tough. I you guys had a show last night. I bombed. I bombed at our show. I bombed the entrance
You have to enter through the front. Yeah, and the whole the whole crowd is in front of you
Yes, you gotta go and I was coming out to grab you too. I know I didn't know there was a side entrance You have to enter through the front. And the whole crowd is in front of you. Yes.
You gotta go and...
I was coming out to grab you too.
I know, I didn't know there was a side entrance.
And so I did head down and I looked up
and I thought I heard someone like,
I thought I heard some ruckus for Kyle.
So I did like a half like, yeah, it's me type way gesture.
Wait, you did that?
To the crowd and it got nothing.
So then I just scurried away. Wait, wait, you did that to the crowd and it got nothing Then I just scurried away. Wait, you did a double hand like like the I did like the yeah, it's Kyle gesture
What's that like when you think you're getting collectively acknowledged positively so you do like them?
And I got I got no I got no nothing
To what degree is that true though like are you just thinking that is this like MOOC saying he bombed well if you do
Stuff like that
Classic MOOC. Oh every time I was tough. It'll be laughs. It'd be like dude. That was brutal like talking about man
Like I'll be watching and I'll say out of my mouth. He's crushing and then you'll come upstairs. You'll be like, this is fucking stupid
I'll be watching and I'll say out of my mouth. He's crushing and then you'll come upstairs. You'll be like this is fucking stupid
Yeah, I don't know um you may have over thinking it you might be
you but you always are on that end but like
It's still just brutal and there's like all kinds of things that are on loop in my head that I fucked up on these awkward things and
I'm considering just being done with it and just, like, leaning in to what I could be
if I wasn't aware, which is hopefully not a winking man.
I think, dude, at your core, you're a wink man.
I gotta stop winking.
You might have... Yeah, the only way out might be through.
You might just have to be... throw out a lot more winks.
The fact that...
You might just have to start peppering people with winks
and it's like, all right, he's the wink guy.
The fact that when your brain is off just have to start peppering people with winks and it's like all right He's the wink guy the fact that you when your brain is off your natural mode is to wink
I don't think I've ever legitimately winked. I mean do you have been in a lot of love scenes? I can't
You can't wink. I can't close one eye at a time. That's why I have to manual. I have to do this to shoot a gun
Never learned I can't burp or wink
Do that actually one I?
One I open what if you do it close your eyes now open one you never learned
Yeah, you just not have the muscle control
That would be a calling card for an assassin like you got a pistol and like every time you kill someone you have to go like
That is that would be good that like I could see like a cool urban youth post in like an Instagram picture like with this
Yeah, that's a cool pose. It wouldn't be the only problem with that is an assassin is that's how you get caught
The feds would be like wink. Oh, yeah
I'm the guy who covers his eyes
How are you two boys
It's a good transition
Yeah, you're right seamless that was pretty good. It didn't disrupt a single thing
manual wink I'm feeling horrible I can't
Can't do the all-nighter is bad. Yeah bad yesterday. I was't, can't do the all nighter. It's bad. It's bad.
Yesterday I was in like a fugue state all day.
We were having conversations in our group chat
and you would just pepper in, I'm so tired
in the middle of like conversations.
That's all you said yesterday.
I know I kept, and then I was texting,
like I think I was waking up
and then just saying what was on my mind to like-
Which was I'm tired.
Anything, I didn't even know who I was texting
and then I would like roll over.
It was like the scenes when someone gets discovered on like a island or something
or like recovered.
You were experiencing delirium.
Yeah. And they're like in the hospital bed and they see the chick that they fumbled.
And then they're like, and then they come back in and out.
And then they're like, dad.
And the dad is dead.
And like, you know, saying like, you just don't know.
Yeah. That was just from those that was from 12 hours of Mario.
So Mario does.
Yeah, we're so weak.
Dude, I snapped out of anger for, I think,
the first time on camera at a comment.
Obama love, Obama liquor.
Obama liquor broke me.
He was coming at your ass.
He was coming at me for seven hours saying
some very mean things, just like,
if you died tomorrow, nobody would care.
I was like, dude, you're fucking, you're a waste.
You're fucking, you, fucking you you use sarcasm
To mask the fact that you don't have a personality and it was shit like this for seven straight hours
And so it's like 4 a.m. I was like shut the fuck up Obama liquor and he comments see that's his real person
Me waiting seven out like oh
Yeah, he destroyed me Obama liquoramalicker came for you.
He was key.
And you uh, yeah you kind of like
You kind of let him get you.
Yeah, I did.
I was like fuck you Obamalicker.
I was like how sad is your existence?
Your existence is pathetic like when you turn off this stream and have to see the reflection of your face on your computer
I want you to feel the utmost pity like I feel for you.
Yeah And like it was I was pissed and he just kept on your computer, I want you to feel the utmost pity like I feel for you.
And like, I was pissed and he just kept,
but then like I could see him just like leaning back
in his chair, he's like, got him.
Like, his work is done.
I broke man.
Do you guys ever fantasize about how you would act
if paparazzis were following you constantly?
No.
No, I guess not.
Yeah. What do you got?
I was always thinking be funny like to wear like shirts that they like can't post online
Like this size shirt that just has a slur on it, and then I'm like I'm so they could post that you would just be in
He's everywhere online mate I
Think I would just like have a iPad around my neck playing like a Disney movie
Right they could yeah, yeah
Dude that is fucking brilliant Obama liquor this guy doesn't have personality
That was the most original thought I've ever heard I got home, and I was exhausted for 12 hours of staying up all night.
And instead of going to bed, I was Googling Obama liquor and I was trying to see if there's any digital footprint
whatsoever.
You try to, yeah, I've done this.
Been there.
It's the worst position, you'll never find anything.
I won't find anything he won, pretty handily.
It's the most anonymous and temporary a person can be.
And you try to justify it with that.
Like, oh, they're hiding behind this like,
this like fake username, no profile, no like identity.
Like they're not real, but yeah, they're very real.
They're real dudes and it's a no-lose situation for them.
And they're getting to you and you're not getting to them.
He broke me and I was like, dude, fuck you.
Like how sad is your life to be doing this?
And the thing is, I guarantee you, he was having a blast.
Yeah, he was probably having so much fun.
Just, oh, this is so funny.
I like the thing. I was going to the mats with one guy and I'd said that.
Oh, you, you said that I busted out. I deadlift for uh... Oh, you said... I said that I...
You busted out, I deadlift 420.
Oh, that sucked, Rudy.
That was so fucking horrible.
Yes! I don't know, though.
He came back like...
Oh, I'm bad at Mario? I deadlift 420.
That's what you did!
I did, and I was like...
And then everybody's...
That was like a shift of like, usually everybody hates the troll,
because they're watching us because they're having a good time,
and this guy's like, trolling.
Everybody shifted and took that guy's side
And make it seem no listen I I got destroyed too
I was bad, but I thought I got destroyed too. I was like why'd I do that and then like he came back like seven hours later
He's like, oh Rudy over here hard oak and lift for 420 pounds that guy went to bed and got up in the morning
He woke up thinking about it. We didn't the car lot
I'll lift a Civic
I've talked to Kyle about this you get to points in this because I've done a moocan sleep
So I get a troll in at like midnight or like what I am
Yeah, I'm like tired already and then you get to the point where you start calling them pussies
Yes, as soon as you start like exacting masculinity on
anonymous trolls you are fucked
exacting masculinity on anonymous trolls. You are fucked.
They own you.
They own you.
I'm like, fuck you, pussy.
I'm not weak.
I guess the only way you can win
is if you don't acknowledge it.
But then everybody else is still seeing it.
I never brought up Obama liquor to you guys
as it was happening, but you guys were all seeing it
and just not saying anything. It's so, it's a weird, uncomfortable
error. Yeah. I turned into like a two year old, like you've seen it a million times.
Like when I get back into a corner, I just keep saying, I'll one V one you in reading.
I don't know what that means. Yeah. You've been challenging me to a reading competition.
Yeah. You got to stop doing that. Before 20 comments now. Rudy did bring up his ACT score
in an argument too. One of the funniest things I've ever heard.
That's not great.
You did do that.
So Rudy was like, I got a 34 on reading comprehension on my ACTs.
To flex on a hater.
And then we were like, Joe, we were fucking with Rudy.
We were like, well, what?
Did you get extra time?
He's like, he, yes.
Yes.
He kept more information.
Yeah, of course you did better reading comprehension with extra time.
Yes, and then, well, not only that, I had separate days.
Separate days for each thing.
He did a sleep away ACT.
You had to stay the night and think about his next answers
for 12 hours.
ACT retreat.
The funniest thing is someone said so, it was like the masters.
It was like, yeah.
Oh yeah, yeah, dude.
You wore your Sunday red for the science portion.
Hilarious.
Well dude, the 420, I envision this combo going,
I can deadlift 420, which by the way,
is the cumulative weight of that guy's entire family.
I think that's like impressive.
And he's like, oh, that was probably your ACT score
or your SAT score.
And then you're like, actually, I go to 34.
Exactly.
If you're bringing up high school feats, you lost.
Yeah.
You've lost, not only have you lost, you've lost really fucking badly.
If you ever go to like ass kicking or like I called him a fucking no life
lose lost. Yeah, I don't know if there's any.
You go back to Jock real quick.
Like I told one dude, you get center ice.
You did say that.
Oh, dude.
You said if you met me at center, I really said if you met me at center ice, your life would never be the same.
Do you think Rudy is the most affected by trolls in this room?
Maybe.
Do it hurts me more than I project.
Me too. Yeah, I'm very sensitive.
The problem is if you give weight to the good ones, you then also give weight to the bad ones.
And what fun is it to not give weight to the good ones?
Right.
When someone's like, you know what?
And they say something really specific
that you're like, you know what?
That guy's right.
I should feel good about that.
You're also gonna feel bad about the bad one.
You can't be selective in what comment you're believing.
Right.
But then if you don't listen to any of it,
do you turn into Kanye?
I don't know what the right balance is.
No, right. Yeah, right.
But like I will get like 10 nice ones and then I'll get a mean one.
And I just that I could I could recite them all.
As a yak outsider, I tend to get get washed pretty hard, like, and I'll look.
And then I'm like, why did I look at this?
It's I don't know what I think it's because they if I could do something where I'm like, why did I look at this? It's, I don't know what it, I think it's because they,
if I could do something where I was guaranteed
to win every time, would I do it?
Probably.
Maybe I start, I might start doing it.
It's good like stimulation for them.
I've dipped my toe into it with Cheyenne says what,
or said what.
Is that your TikTok account?
Yeah.
Are you trolling?
No, I'm hating. Oh, you trolling? No, I'm hating.
Oh, you're hating?
Yeah, I'm full on hating.
What are you doing to hate?
I'm letting the generational disconnect get to me.
I'm hating on presumably 17-year-olds
for not knowing who Jon Hamm is.
Oh, like those videos of like they look at celebs?
Yeah, they were like, who the fuck knows these people like who knows Courtney Cox and John Hamm in the realm of celebrity
Guessing those are obvious
Yeah
In the realm of celebrity
I'm commenting in like essay format like trying to own these people and you ever get anything back
That's the thing I do get some love.
Oh.
And it's addicting.
Like if 16 people heart to your comment.
Yeah.
Yeah, the only thing worse than bad attention
is no attention, dude.
You think, man?
Yes, because I think about the paparazzi thing
and I'm like, I try to think of the clever thing I would do
to like devalue my footage.
And then I'm like, the one day, and then they'll stop showingalue my footage and then I'm like the one day and then
They'll stop showing up one day and then I'll feel the worst I've ever felt
Yeah, I think I believe that there's nothing worse than when they just forget you it sucks when there's something you feel like like
I feel like I haven't been as good as I once was and then I got a comment
That's like Nick fell off since since he moved to Chicago then has like 12 up votes
So like an Apostles amount of likes that's like a big group of dudes.
You saw 12 dudes walking by and it's like all those guys hate you when they when they
when they say something that you were already kind of thinking.
Yeah, it is sucks when they kind of are spitting facts.
Yeah.
I've had people be like, I don't worry about that.
I'm like, they bring us a valid point.
Yeah.
Yeah, maybe they're on the sound., they bring up some valid points. Yeah.
Yeah, maybe they're just trying to help.
Yeah.
But I get frustrated.
Like, do you ever have an annoying person
who's, like, really supportive, though,
so you feel like you need to talk to them,
and then they just forget about you one day?
Oh, yes, dude.
I'm like, dude, I just, you're so annoying,
and I sat here not being confident enough
to just accept that my output is good enough for this relationship, and you're so annoying and I sat here not being confident enough to just accept that my output is good enough for this relationship
and you're being annoying.
Now, don't get me wrong, I love chatting
with people who message me, especially when they're cool,
but when they're not and then they forget you,
it's so mean.
I miss them.
Yeah, come back.
Yeah, you didn't do enough.
And then you're like, remember that time that you said,
oh, this person.
Hey man, it's me. Hey, remember me? Brutal, dude. Yeah, you didn't do enough and then you're like remember that time that you said
Brutal dude, it's tough out here man. It's a tough job
Dude I remember I when I'm like the first guys that was ever like an anus fan I followed him on Instagram Instagram. Like, you know, I always tried to like,
he was like, dude, thank you so much.
And then like, he just got married.
So when we started the show, what, four years ago,
he just got married.
I commented like, congrats.
He didn't even like like it.
Yeah, he forgot about you.
He forgot about me, man.
And that's on me.
I don't think about like Aaron Paul anymore.
Oh, I don't either.
He was like my hero 10 to 12 years ago. Aaron Paul was. Oh, I don't either he was like my hero ten to twelve years Paul was your hero
He was Jesse Pinkman so I was like when breaking bad was the thing like yeah, yeah
No, no, he's he's nothing dude. It's tough
And sometimes there'll be like a rapper that I follow that I no longer listen to and And I'm like, I'm gonna follow you forever
because I want people to do this for me.
Yeah, you want to, yeah, so...
Yeah, I've actually done that too,
where you're like, I can't let go.
I can't let go of Ski Mask the Slump God,
I'll follow him.
You'll follow him to the end of the year.
I'll follow him forever. I will.
I may never listen to another song
if he puts one out.
Because if you unfollow,
then that means
that there's a reason for someone to unfollow you.
Correct. I want someone who likes me
to always like me.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's...
There's a commitment.
Like, if you like Julio, you got to...
You're signing on forever.
Yeah, dude. And you go up and down.
You know what I mean? Like, you'll have a hot moment.
And, like, I feel like everybody who does this
is trying
To hang on to the best moment they've ever had the best time period they've ever had and it might be hard
it might be impossible to do but like there's definitely been times where I like
Desperately want to just like grasp on to people
Looking at my shit. Oh, yeah, you know, I have a bad algo month. I'm like I'm done dude. I'm cut
Oh, yeah, dude when I'm real down. I'll just watch the live chat of when I finished the final puzzle on
And I'm like I'm watching it like I'm watching like
Porn in the sense that not that I'm jerking off, but like I don't want to get caught yeah, so I'm just like this
I've done that.
Yeah, I want some down days.
CW's flying in the chat room.
Oh, yeah. On some down days.
It's so sad.
Save a go back and be like, remember this?
It's so sad. Yeah.
Well, I have a new group of people who like me now.
What? The the Latin
population has has
taken a liking to me.
And that's like a billion people.
That's the Gomez method.
I may lean completely into it and never turn back.
Drake Bell, Drake to Mexico.
Really? They seem loyal. They love it.
They don't think I'm cringe.
I...
How did you get them?
One day I rapped in Spanish on TikTok
and it just immediately went viral. Yeah, I'll spend a hundred hours editing a thoughtful travel piece
17 people watch it and then I just get on fucking tik-tok and start spitting bars in Spain, Espanol and
That would feel good come to the barbecue bro, I've never gotten I've never gotten a jaja
You can do it with the Philippines like they're the easiest though You can just be like shut up easier than Brazil
Brazil yes, but it's such like a big diverse place. I think all of the Philippines will come come to you
I'm pretty sure John Stamos had a concert in Brazil that had like 1.8 million people sure yeah
They do the biggest crowd if you can tap into Brazil somehow that can definitely be huge
Also, dude, like I don't if you guys are in any Brazilian music. No some funk. Yes. Yeah
Yeah, Beltran and how the couple house DJs vintage culture. Wait, is this it? This is it. Oh my god
How many views
Wait, is it even your song?
You're doing a cool guy voice too.
153,000 likes.
The most viewed moment in my career.
So wait, was it...
It's a song that exists of a guy.
So it was just you singing a song?
Correct. Singing along to a song on my couch. Took seven seconds, and it's the most viewed thing I've ever...
What does that say?
Nah, bro, you're one of us.
That has to...
Oh, I need it!
You have any idea how good that feels?
I need it so bad.
You have any idea how good that feels?
And it's all positive, dude.
Do you guys get the HBCU TikToks of like,
who's a white person that black people don't play about?
If somebody ever said me, I would I you I would shout from the rooftops, man.
Yeah. Nick's a radio thing. I start levitating. Oh, my God.
I think, yeah. My third eye would open on my forehead.
Sending. Do you know who one of those people is?
You ever see the clip of the guy goes, I said, I didn't have time for that.
But today I got time because no, I haven't seen that, no.
Dude, it's a kid who's like,
fairly frivolously using the N-word
and like talking shit on the street.
Trippie Redd sampled it in one of his songs,
and it's like, the fucking comments are all like,
like they love him, they love this kid.
It's a white boy.
White boy.
He goes, I said I didn't have time for that,
but today I got time because
All right, so i'll try that he's living the dream
We should try that they're like he's still with all 10 toes down
Oh, oh
The comments are like, you know, he wasn't messing around
No one's upset about his use of any language that he shouldn't be using and I that is what I associate with what you just said
I want it so bad. I haven't gotten to that point yet, but I am being claimed by the black community.
Yeah.
I can see that.
Yeah, because you're a redhead.
I did see that.
The big ginger czar black movement happening from the black community.
That's huge, man.
That's got to feel good.
Yeah.
I love it, bro.
I love that for you.
It's fucking awesome.
I've been saying that, you know?
You deserve it, man.
Not it.
I've been saying that. Ho, is you, but not it. I've seen that. Oh is you Puerto Rican question mark
Oh my god. I would feel better than most drugs you even got the accent down there
Then there's some there like the way he says toto
It's insane
It's just me fucking rapping in Spanish. I did dude. You know who you got I you got to collect every time you do something
In Spanish, it's guaranteed half a million views.
It's crazy.
The gays are die hard.
Yeah but I feel as if the gays are volatile.
Just as soon as they'll love ya,
they'll spit you right out.
Yes, yeah it's like a weapon of mass destruction.
Like you're dealing with.
They'll hit you with like 10 adjectives
of like flaws that you have.
Yeah.
These are great, Ed.
Oh my God.
Yeah, this guy's-
If you're ever down, I might go look at these
to cheer me up.
Yeah.
Just the fact that like I know this guy.
Ho is you young chimmy, that's the guy.
Oh, that seems cool.
Dude, I'll just watch Benny the Butcher go,
"'That's Rhone?'
And I'll be like, fuck it.
Oh, dude, Rhone, Rhone.
He has it. Fully has it. Yeah. I feel like Rhone could have it be like, fuck it. Oh dude, Rhone, Rhone. He has it.
Fully has it.
Yeah.
I feel like Rhone could have it with any group of people.
Yep.
He's a wizard.
Yep.
Magical charm.
Renaissance version.
It's really true.
He's got it.
I feel like you had the Brits for a minute or is that?
I had a little, I had the Brits and Iowans
for a little minute.
That's not a bad one-two punch.
Hell yeah, hell yeah.
Shout out to Iowa, dude.
Big biggest shout out.
Damn, I need a group.
We need groups, bro.
And it's like, whatever,
if these are the only people
who ever came to my shows again
and my entire show was me just singing
my library of Spanish songs that I could sing along to,
I'd potentially be open to it.
Why not?
Why not?
Make that my career.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, like Mexico loves Drake Bell's music and he moved down there and I bet you he has
Millions of plays on Spotify month. Yeah. Yeah, do they go crazy? Like have you seen Bad Bunny's concerts?
Oh, that's nuts the best show I've ever been to I've been to two of them bad bunny
Yeah, I went to the one in Washington DC is the best show I've ever been to at a national stadium
It was dude. he probably did 40 songs.
Every person acting like every of those 40 songs
was his top hit and singing along to every lyric.
It was mind blowing.
It was awesome.
I mean, I tried.
And that was in D.C.
In D.C. I then went to the arena show at Barclays,
very good, but the outdoor vibe is like a little.
Wait, Dominican Republic?
Oh, no, no.
Oh, D.C. as in, oh, SDR, Jesus Christ.
He's not touring in the US.
And I think I'm going to go.
I want to try to go to his bonus show because he said his bonus show is the best
Argentina does it right to him walking out for like the WWE was the coolest thing
I've ever seen. He's the go dude.
The guy's the fucking man.
I face time to them for one.
Oh, yeah. I saw you talking about that.
Oh, my God. I did talk about this on the show.
Not on the show.
I know. Whatever. Talk about it. I faced it. I won a competition on the show? Not on the show. Anyway, whatever.
Talk about it.
I won a competition because a guy who came to my show knew that I liked Bad Bunny and
he ran the competition.
He's like, oh, that's illegal.
He's like, I'm going to insert you as the winner.
So Bad Bunny's going to FaceTime with you at 12, 11 p.m. on Tuesday.
And he called me.
Oh, you beat out like thousands of people.
Colombian 13 year olds who had nothing else.
And I think there was-
All they had is an iPhone.
That's all they had.
There was part of him that acknowledged
what you're talking about in our brief one minute call.
Bad Bunny was like, it's you?
He talked to me in Spanish, I said I don't speak Spanish,
and then he mockingly spoke Spanish really fast.
That's a good retort.
And then we paused and I was like, sick. And then we both started laughing really fast. That's a good retort. And then we paused, and I was like, sick.
And then we both started laughing really hard.
And then I just started asking him questions.
I didn't know what to do.
And I tell my wife this, and she can't get through the story
because she thinks it's so cringe.
I'm like, what's your favorite city to do?
I don't know.
What does he say?
He's like, you know, Boston, Montreal.
Dude, that competition is for like chubby preteen girls.
Yes.
I have that body.
Yeah, but the fact that you didn't be like morally,
I can't accept this FaceTime with Bad Bunny.
Why?
You ripped it away from.
I wasn't the ripper.
I was the beneficiary of the ripping.
Fair.
Yeah. I guess, yeah.
I know. You guys are right.
No, no, no. I mean, I like to say this from my point of view,
but if I had the chance for a FaceTime with Bad Bunny, you would do it?
Yeah. What was his pose?
Did he have his phone low? Did he look cool?
He did this fucked up thing.
So first of all, they're like, do not screen record or screenshot.
The call will drop. It was in this like special app that was designed for this competition
So I I didn't want to try to see if that was true or not. I considered filming from an angle with another device
I was like you're getting too deep. They're like we'll send you a screenshot at the end
So they did but he's wearing a thing over his face. What so no one believes me that it's a can't wait
Can I see the photo? Yeah, yeah. It probably is.
Dude, it's 100% him.
Like, it's just so frustrating
that it was like a tree falls in the woods thing.
Oh, shit, it's noon.
Oh, shit.
Oh, fuck.
Oh, damn.
Sorry.
No, it's fine, we'll do it.
Can we pick up after Yak?
Yeah, yeah.
Cool, cool.
Mook, I'll send you the picture.
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All right, we're back.
We had to run down to the Yak with time got away from us.
Julio, you're about to show us the picture of you and
Without a doubt the real bad bunny dude. It was it's so frustrating because how much it was it's obviously him
Oh that does have to be frustrating
He did this because he was probably like an FU to Corona for making him do this
So he like was in the full disguise because he knew that whoever did this would cherish the selfie your little smile
I'm very excited. This is sponsored. Yeah, that's yeah. No Corona
You're not you can't screenshot so they send you a selfie of the combo, but this is what he was wearing
Was he like how'd you know he was laughing because we've just both started laughing our ass off together, dude
Was he smart? He was smiling was he smiling the whole time? Could you tell I don't couldn't tell but he was laughing because we've just both started laughing our ass off together dude was he smile
He was smiling was he smiling the whole time could you tell I don't couldn't tell but he was without a doubt laughing
He was going like oh
Wow, you really got him well. He got himself. Oh, okay
He thought it was funny that he did the joke where he spoke Spanish exclusively really fast
And I didn't know so yeah, so that doesn't seem to be him dude. It's usually 100%
Can we pull up a comparison?
Bro, it's him those eyes. I mean if it's not him. It's a bad money impersonator. Okay. Yeah
Or he would send bro. It's him. It's like we gotta get the eye. Oh, that's not him bro. It's fully him
Those eyes look way different dude, but this is a different time. This is like pull up like.
Do you think that looks like?
Pull up for Ramos and T Bad Bunny.
That is an Asian woman.
It looks like an Asian.
Well, we need more pictures, dude.
It's fully him.
Like when he had he was like really skinny at one point.
What's the song?
How long has he been doing this? Doing his thing?
2016? This is current? Yeah, this is a little more...
I don't know, man.
Again, that's a Chinese woman.
You talk to a Chinese woman, she'll laugh at you.
Dude, this is so frustrating.
Bad Bunny is one of the biggest superstars on Earth,
and he's just doing a FaceTime competition?
Well, bro, he has a big...
It was ten, only 10 FaceTimes.
I cannot believe like you even put your hat in the ring.
My literal hat, like there?
That's close.
Or just to do it?
Bro, it's him.
It's him.
Now, do you think that he saw your TikTok?
Now you have the Spanish contingent?
There's one specific guy who, when I do it,
it tends to do really well.
I haven't been doing bad bunny ones as well,
because, like, it's more obvious
that a gringo would know about bad bunnies.
I want to show that I have, like, deep-cut people
that I know about. And they respect that.
They're like, yo, this is a poll.
They say that.
Yeah.
Are you fluent in Spanish?
I don't speak a word of Spanish.
So you just phonetically repeat it?
Yeah, it's like sounds, but I don't know what I'm saying. So you just phonetically repeat it? Yeah, it's like sounds.
But I don't know what I'm saying.
So could you be saying something bad?
Well, for sure.
I'm most likely saying something terrible.
About being, you know, whatever rappers would say
is what they're saying.
You were early to the game with Bad Bunny.
Fairly.
America, white.
Yeah, America-wise.
I was probably like 2018.
I started listening to this stuff
when I used to teach tennis
There was a guy who I was roommates with he had the car so he would drive us and he would listen to this music
this is in like
2005 2006 and then I kind of like fell out of it for a bit and then bad bunny got me back into it and now
It's like my only genre at this point. Oh, that's your only genre
Bad money Wow, no, not bad, but like like Latin trap music and reggaeton. That's it
Yeah, I mean I whatever. Let's just it just I love how happy you look that little smile. Can we zoom in on?
When the sweepstakes was it like this is the selfie time or no, they didn't do that. So you were just like that the whole time
I thought they're like three two one cheese. Do you roll patch? What? What yeah, yeah, you kind of do or is that just lip shadow? Oh, I know it's not like a proper soul patch
I think it's shadow, but did you like think about what outfit you were gonna wear?
Or did you have like pre written jokes that you wanted to say? No, dude
I think I was just like what the fuck am I gonna say?
And I guess I just thought I was gonna ask him what places he likes to go
Which I can't my wife
Can't finish me saying to her
What she thinks you say your wife? What did you say my wife can't finish me saying?
She can't finish me saying
Doing a reenactment of me asking bad bunny. Oh, yeah. Yeah, what did you ask him? What place?
What cities he likes to go? I don't know what I'm supposed to say
I would have just been dead silent let him speak first I did he was expecting that I have a teenage girls
They went Spanish this is a contest for teenage girls bro. No bad bunny concert is all you know
You just facetimed him and he's like prepared and it's like
Yeah, when you got the call didn't it say, like, Bad Bunny's calling?
So in this, like, specific app that was designed for this, yes.
And it was, like, Bad Bunny, and there was, like, a picture of him.
Do you still have the app on your phone?
No, no.
Okay.
It's pretty embarrassing, I know.
But I was excited.
So he did 10 people, 1, 1-minute calls.
Correct.
And I then realized later, I'm like, how would I feel if I were talking to me in the roles
reverse? I might be like, I could never be peers with this guy.
You over thought this whole situation so, so much.
Did you say, oh, my God, it's you.
It's really you. I think I went, oh, you went that you did that. You said, I go, I didn't go. I can't believe it's really you. I think I went, oh. You went that, you did that?
You said, I go.
I didn't go, I can't believe it's really you.
No, I wasn't, I was cooler than that, dude.
What was like the first thing you said?
I don't speak Spanish because he spoke Spanish.
He was like, oh, da da da.
And I was like, dude, I don't speak Spanish.
Which made him do the joke of speaking fast.
Did you try, were you like, did you call him Benito?
I did not.
Okay.
But I like that you know.
Is that his name?
I just Googled.
Benito, yeah.
And if you're like cool, you say like,
oh bro, when's Benito coming?
No, that's not if you're cool.
Beno.
No.
No, really?
Yes. I can't say it cool.
Kyle always calls MGK Colson.
Oh yeah, that's another thing.
That's what I could have done before.
Oh yeah, when you were filming with Colson.
Yeah, I was laces up early.
Dude, the guy could spit bars, dude.
He's physically weirder than you'd think.
He's like 6'6".
He looks like a giant spider.
MGK is the bomb.
He's humongous.
Yeah, he's got like a je ne sais quoi, dude. Yeah, he swooping it. He's swooping in on Sweeney. Couldn't have failed
Couldn't have failed
He's also very talented. You're saying he's too big to fail? Like he just has this like
Presence where you're like, oh this guy that makes sense. He does have a presence. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah
Yeah, he's so much bigger than you think
I think that comes you have a presence if you're tall.
Like I think a lot of superstars are just tall guys.
But there are some tall guys
that I'll see like out of the store.
They're awkward.
They have like, they're shy.
They don't wanna be tall.
Yeah. Yes.
Why boy Rick is like that.
He doesn't wanna be tall, yeah.
Yeah, he's very, very worried
about his physical presence in his space.
Like at a bar, he's constantly worried
that he's gonna like knock over shelves shelves or like, fall through the floor.
Like he moves like he's Shrek but scared.
It's crazy.
Like whenever someone towers over me, I'm automatically like,
oh, this guy's like, like the man.
You think so?
Yeah, like usually.
I mean, that's how it should be.
It is.
The tall guy, like my friend's tall too.
And he's like, he's like, I'm like, dude, you're like 6'4".
He goes, dude, no, I'm not. I'm like, yes, you are. He's like, he's like, it's too, and he's like he's like I'm like dude. You're like six four He doesn't do no. I'm not I'm like yes. You are he's like he's a suit all I'm like six three
Yeah, I'm like you know what I'm looking at your six four
Yeah, but you're not a short man. Are you no, but he I don't think about that
I don't know like I'm just whatever if someone's taller than me. I don't care
Yeah, it's fine. Yeah, But like a tall guy deserves his flowers.
I mean, yeah, there's plenty of tall guys
who couldn't deadlift as much as me.
There you go.
That works, that plays.
Or he.
There it is.
Or him.
There it is.
But Rudy, you're tall and can deadlift a lot.
Yes, exactly.
I think it helps.
Yes, you bring up a very good point, Nicholas.
Well said, Nicholas.
Yes.
I concur.
But yeah, I think it also doesn't.
If you're in the near six foot realm
and you see other tall people, it doesn't feel as bad
because you're sort of like, we're in the same camp.
You're just a little bit taller.
Whereas if you were shorter, I feel like tall people
would be more annoying.
Oh, right, right.
You see what I'm saying?
Yeah.
And also we have a weirdly,stow is weirdly large huge office
Not even talking about the fat, but like the height. Yeah, a tall guy sure it's weird. It's really weird
I remember thinking that when I first got here. I was Rone's a sneaky six
I was like Rone is big Caleb's tall big cats a fucking fridge. It's crazy
Brandon is like head turningly large. I've noticed he's like he presents much bigger than he's like what six five
He presents bigger than that. Yeah, you're the height of an NBA player like a
point guard
Yes, you are he's six three
You are yeah, no way no one knows nobody knows no one knows soft height is a good quality. Thank you
I'm a soft six. Yeah, I didn't yeah
Yeah, I'm a weak six. I'd say
Yeah, I'm 512. There are some people that they they earn every inch they have though
Like I think I'm trying to think around the office
Nikki smokes he's just you he's a six he I
Don't know where I'm going with this at all. You're six, three.
I think.
Crazy.
That's the craziest one maybe I've ever heard.
He blows people away.
I mean, that's just, that has to be a confidence.
I'm just saying, like, if you're like six, one, I'd be like,
okay, cool.
If six, two, like, oh, six, three, I'm like, that's nuts.
Nick is like pretty much command room.
I agree.
Thank you so much
No, even the people staring at him don't know
Even the people that are looking at me down people look down at you. I'm like
Shorty shorty
Soft height is a good quality dude. I don't know man. It's nice
It's good. I think I'd rather be a hard six than a soft six three
Oh controversial. Yeah. Yeah, it's just everybody wants everybody wants what they don't have I
Don't know if anybody wants to be shorter
Some people maybe do just like the people we were talking about but for I've never heard a six three person wish they were six
Kyle, what would you be like if you were six one?
I think do you think you'd have this job? I think I'd be
like a superstar
Like in what like a like a um not even like a generational superstar
You know me you know photoshopped yourself to make you look taller no
I can't even think about it cuz I just think like I I know I would be a
mega star
Like beyond a household name beyond
I love it in this part for the best that um you know I've got an easier simple life now. Yeah, you're right
So you're saying it'd be overwhelmed so you're five seven
Yes, what are you at at five nine? What do you like at five nine five nine? I'm So you're thankful. It'd be overwhelming. So you're 5'7". Yes.
What are you at at 5'9"?
What do you like at 5'9"?
5'9", I'm between...
I'm very big.
Okay, yeah.
I'm famous.
I'm a fam...
I'm famous at 5'9".
Like A-list?
I'm like hemispherical famous.
Maybe not, I don't, maybe don't transcend
to the Eastern hemisphere, but I'm famous.
Big in Brazil.
At 5'9".
And what, 5'8"?
If I was 5'9", 5'8", yeah.
So you're an inch away from what?
I'm two inches away from world fame.
And I'm a humble guy. two inches away from from world fame.
And I'm a humble guy. So it's weird to admit that.
I really think I really think.
Yeah. Oh, my God, man.
That's that's.
Yeah, but you're so close, man.
So funny. Two inches.
It's all the difference.
Life is a game of interest.
You're a big five seven, I would say.
That's that's just an oxymoron.
You're a jumbo shrimp. Yeah.
Yeah. You're you're a big five seven.
Come on, Rudy.
Dude, but he doesn't he's he is.
And that was like I'm surrounded by people who are much taller than they appear
so I get that a lot like
Like Nick big cat like all those Brandon Walker are so much taller than they seem in
Proportionate view but so yeah. Yeah, that's gotta be yeah. No, I
Remember once you were that we turned down this block in New York City. You were the tallest on the street
I wanted to do like a series where I've get
progressively
larger groups of people who are all shorter than me and
Just take pics with them that that'd be a really good series man like a photo series a photo series
Yeah, yeah, that'd be awesome. Mm-hmm the coffee table book. Do you want to put on shorter than Kyle fest?
Yes, yes, let's do it yeah
That's about none of us will see you there people have to be
five to an under
Kyle you're inviting a bunch of children to an event
If it's just all kids, I want to five two and under men
Men I think there's enough in this world where some would come to a festival
Okay, yeah, let's try to put it on me. Just do a one meet-and-greet photo with each
It's like a collage book meet Kyle
Are you in every photo?
Yeah next to a shorter man.
But he's not like, he's proportionately normal.
So I look massive.
And then I think I would become famous.
People who don't know.
I think that I think I could become world famous.
I think I could become a TikTok star.
If those pictures were released.
They're just like, who's this guy?
Who's this huge guy?
This is a big boy.
Yeah.
You gotta give him the quiz.
You need to find, do you remember the Carl's Jr.
Laker Girl photo shoot?
Yeah, of course.
The tiny guy.
I gotta find a bunch of them.
Yeah.
Do you guys recall the Carl's Jr.?
No.
The Laker Girls did a photo shoot
of I believe a Hardee's.
I've spoken about this a lot
and there's one guy who is just
preposterously proportionately tiny.
So he's tiny but everything,
we don't know.
There he is.
Oh yeah. I have seen this. I thought this was fake.
No, and there's other angles. There's a video. He's so...
It's unbelievable. Because if you looked at the Asian girl as one, like that's a five foot zero girl.
Yeah.
Just because that's what they tend to be.
So maybe she's freakishly tall.
I don't know, man.
I think it's just like.
Is he 12?
No, I don't think so.
He's just a tiny Lakers fan.
I think it's a massive Southeastern Asian girl.
No, I don't think so.
Look, somebody actually got it on video.
This is on the Aiden's subreddit.
Oh, fuck.
What does that little guy have on there? It's on the Aiden's subreddit. Oh Oh a smaller version of me. Yeah. Oh man. He's like lowercase petite.
It's strange because there's nothing if you're like if you're like four feet tall there's
usually something that sticks out like yeah right that he is everything just makes sense. Yeah, he's proportionate crazy
Today today's episode is 448 which is the area code of the Florida Panhandle
Which is maybe one of my favorite places that I don't go to
Pensacola so we got Pensacola
that I don't go to. Have you ever been before?
Pensacola.
So we got Pensacola, Tallahassee.
Panama City.
Destin, Panama City.
I got a Build-A-Bear in Destin and named it Destin.
30A, shout out 30A.
30A might be, that's like a nicer spot,
but this is an area, you go to this place,
not to look cool or to be cool
or to have an impactful experience
or to see things or to expand your world.
But you go here to be a shithead.
Yeah. Yeah, you do.
There's nice parts, like you said.
White sand, like the white sand beaches.
I think it's awesome.
I like it too.
I don't know much about it.
People call it lower Alabama.
Okay.
Yeah, it's very rural, very
actually southern compared to the rest
of Florida. Yeah.
Would you call it very rural?
Yeah, I think it's it's actually
the part of Florida that is rural,
like you can go miles and miles.
Do they have a traditional southern
accent?
I I don't know, because I
have been there. It was the the last ruin, the ruins of my last Instagram
post Panama City Beach. Oh wow yes. What was the caption to that? Ass on Steubenville Ohio
but the face looks just like Panama City Beach in reality
That was not what I was going for because Panama City Beach is also a shithole
I always forget your only Instagram post is you in an ass. My only Instagram posts are me partying hard. Yeah, you're right
That's what I was trying to give off
Sweating you're not just part just partying, partying at, partying hard. But that's just a picture.
That's the bone chilling one.
You're not in that.
Why is that bone chilling?
That was the, the riot of 2012.
Yeah, that's just me proving that a.
You were there.
I mean, look at the party.
It's a good party.
But Panama City Beach 2015 is a cornerstone event.
This was the last time young men were truly evil
and freely wicked.
I'm not exaggerating.
If you've been there, you know.
This was the last year that alcohol was allowed
on the beach.
Oh.
And people were acting, That alcohol was a lot on the beach. Oh and
People were acting
People were tribes maxing like everyone was acting like a like an act like a warrior of yesteryear
People this you don't understand the scene there were crime
People were like Comanche Indians. Everyone was bloodthirsty.
Not just the men and the young men, the girls too.
They were bloodthirsty.
Yes.
Like the men would get, like people were just hunting
and killing and tanning hides and I'm not kidding,
there'd be circles on the beach.
People would plant their flag down
of their college or fraternity.
And there would be circles.
And then they were crime circles.
In the circles were just crimes.
Like what kind of crimes?
2015 I think was the last year,
like you can do stuff in public
without really worrying about it,
like resurfacing on social media.
So like you'd go in the middle of these circles
and like there'd be like an 85 pound girl,
like who just did like 10 rounds of Oklahoma drills with men and
like dizzy bat and she's like pissing down her leg and like some dude in Chino joggers
and her rock cheese is like he's doing something nefarious making out with her. There's dudes
in backpacks and Roche runs and everyone was looking to sin harder than the last sin
How's poetic and beautiful and they were oh you are taking did you create was in a sense like it was like?
If you can't beat him join them, so I was like barking on my snapchat story
To like people or do you just was on your face and you're barking. It's probably, I was like, woo hoo! Just like going around making sounds, everything.
It was purely animalistic here.
And you had a tribe?
I had like a group of dudes,
but like people were truly evil.
This is the last time men were acting like evil boys.
I can't, it's hard to state how,
but this was when Dak Prescott got beat up.
Oh, 2015 at Panama City Beach, yeah.
Yeah, people were just looking to beat up
the bigger and bigger things.
Dak Prescott shouldn't be getting beat up.
No, he shouldn't.
Dak Prescott, he should be saved.
People would wanna.
But nowadays, he's not getting touched.
People were looking for the next bigger kill.
I'm telling you, people were tribesmen.
So he had a target on him.
Like, yes, people were looking for, this was had a target on him. Like yes if you were looking
This was a different world. They were hunting him for sport They wanted a big trophy and like there were co-ed beat downs like the dude would beat the
Would punch the guy and then the girl would like start stomping on him
Can't say I've ever been during like a spring break
Did you or did you were you having fun deep down or were you feeling?
unsafe you take on you take on
No, yeah, it was the best time of my life
Yeah, it's great dude did any of your boys do anything evil that you thought differently of?
Yes.
It was pure evil.
And everyone, like, I think I brought $80 in cash,
4.20s, and had us a whole week there.
Yeah.
Yes.
It was like a mixture of like the evilest college kids
and locals.
Those were the ones who would wear like the
the Jordans on the beach.
Yeah.
These were wrestlers you're with there.
They were wrestlers.
That's that is that is scary.
So they were definitely looking.
Oh my God.
Because they're looking for fights outside of.
I remember it was like that.
There were just one wrestler was doing pull ups on one of the pipes in the club and it broke off and it was like that. There were just one wrestler was doing
pull ups on one of the pipes in the club
and it broke off and it flooded the place.
And that was like that was like a big
win for those for that tribe.
They go for infrastructure.
Yes, Moisey was running around like a
Mongol. He just got second at NCAA.
So it was right after the NCAA wrestling.
Oh, my god.
Drunk wrestlers are terrifying. They're tolerant to so low because they haven't had liquid in six
months. And they just want to arm bar anything and everything. They just want to touch. They just
want to touch. Yeah. Women or men. They'll touch. They're sneaky. They'll go below the radar and
they'll just be behind you all of a sudden. Yeah, they can really sneak around. Yeah. Oh my God.
Imagine if you were there at 5'9".
I would be in-
You'd be a target.
Maximum, no, I would be, I don't know.
If I was 5'9", in PCB.
World fame.
That's the dream.
I'd be world famous.
There's no way you don't leave there not world famous I would have been world famous
Tallahassee
The architecture is very southern down there which I was nice I was gonna try to roast it
But it seems like there's a lot of greenery
So it's pretty decent pleasant
FSU oh yeah, yeah, yeah if you don't whoa. Oh, I have been to FSU. I was just thinking where's FSU?
those um
Yeah, the trees are are I like that those southern trees that have the stuff like draping down off them
Like the plant like the ones that they always have in a corridor going to some leaping willow
No, it's an oak tree those oak trees are the ones that
But like Louisiana like yeah the classic I thought they're kind of like scary beautiful. Yeah swampy vibes totally
People from there mayday parade nice Creed nice tea pain cool
Ethel Cain my favorite transsexual musician.
That's your favorite trans musician?
She's great.
I like her a little bit sped up, but yeah, she's for me.
T-Pain, I was wondering, who is T-Pain's demographic?
Because he seems like he's kind of for everyone.
Totally.
So I looked up his tour dates.
Oh, he's for everyone.
Where's he T-Pay tour?
August 7th, he's at the West Virginia State Fair.
August 9th, he's at the St. Jean-sur-Richelieu Airport
in Quebec.
Is that the airport?
He's doing an airport spot.
He's doing an airport spot.
Those are the two.
Des Moines Fair as well.
Those have to be the two most opposite places
in North America.
How big are these venues?
This is an airport.
That's crazy. So pretty big.
He streams a lot now.
He's really like gracefully made it to the next generation.
Yeah.
Where a lot of people-
He's not trying to be something he's not.
Without releasing new music really
Oh, yes, but the key he's the ultimate like a guy who just happens to be there when you're you don't like go to see
T pain it's like oh shit T pain is gonna be performing there, and you just get to see that mm-hmm
Yeah, I feel like if you are see him live it happens to you
Yes, you've been yeah, you've been T. Yes. You've been T-Pain.
You've been T-Pain.
All right, let's go plan out this T-Pain trick.
But yeah.
Did you see the video where people were trying to troll him
for flying commercial or something?
He was just so funny about dismissing how stupid it was.
No.
People were saying, oh, T-Pain's broke.
And he was like, y'all are stupid.
That was a really good impression. That sounded a lot like T-Pain.
Tyler Payne, yeah.
Wait, is his name just Tyler Payne?
I think it's Tyler Paynswick.
Nice.
Yeah, he's not broke. He can't be broke.
No. No way.
He's always performing. He's always doing things.
The not using autotune also went super viral.
I love it. Yeah, he's a good singer.
He's a good, talented guy. viral. Love it, yeah he's a good singer. He's a good talented guy.
Yeah.
Love T-Pain.
Yeah.
Antonio Cramardi is also from there.
I haven't heard that name in a long time.
Your father.
He has 14 kids and eight baby mothers.
Light work.
Do you think he could,
he had three kids including twins after his vasectomy? Oh my god
Antonio twins after
That has to be
He's it has to be bursting through extreme speed right imagine it
Can't do that. I thought it was a joke. I thought it was like a
Satirical article now he had twins after his vasectomy. That's impressive. Yeah, I think the only more impressive twin
Fact is Roger Federer two sets of identical twins. No IVF. Oh
He has two sets of identical twins. Yes, no
In vitro fertilization.
Correct, which they say tends to make it happen, right?
That's gotta be goaded.
Have you ever been down to New Martinsville, Kyle?
Lot of twins there.
So many twins.
Yeah, for a town of like 4,000.
Is that an inbreeding situation?
I don't know, man.
It's gotta be something that with the,
they're on the river,
it's gotta be something that's flowing down.
Oh, I thought you guys were just making that up. No, no. every set of twins. I think I've ever met were from New Martinsville. It's a lot a lot in
in Fresno
You guys have twins like when you were growing up that would get into they would use it to their advantage in school
Did we have twins Kyle?
Yes, yeah In school. Did we have twins, Kyle?
Yes. Yeah.
They use it to their advantage.
Not that I knew, no.
Yeah, we had a set of twins at our high school
that were identical and they would swap classes
and go and do things for the other.
Ah, that's how it should be.
Constantly, like you never knew which one was which.
And I got like jealous, it was cool.
They could just run game and like no one could check them.
Like the teachers were like,
I don't know which one of you is this,
but we'll make it work.
My boy Josh, he was so girl crazy.
We went up to, he was like,
dude, let's go hang out with twins tonight.
It was like when I was in high school,
it was in Fallonsby Kyle.
So we went up there, he was like, all right,
like we're gonna hang out with these twins.
And I was just so amped up.
We got out of the car and just,
they were identical twins, but one was a dude.
So he was just chilling with a, he just fucked with me. He was chilling with a chick and I just had,
we were just all hung out.
I don't think that's possible.
Identical twins boy, girl.
You can do that, that's the thing.
Yeah, yes.
No way, I've never heard of that.
So you had to hop on the dude?
I didn't have to hop on the dude,
it was more of just a hangout sesh.
But the way, it was definitely.
Well, I gotta do this for my friend.
He went up to, yeah, he hooked up with a chick.
So you guys gravitated toward each other
No, I'm not saying I mean it could have been platonic, but you guys had to have gravitated toward one enough
He was the one that set it up with this chick. He sold it to me that we were going to hang out with twins
I guess it was my perverted mind
You assume it's two. Yeah
Yeah, dude, dude twins don't get sexualized
Not enough not enough
Yeah, that kind of was a thing that's like always like all twins fucking wins
Because then you're like fantasizing of what fucking them both. Yeah, they're sisters sister. Yeah, that's weird
And wouldn't you want a variety like isn't the thick the if you're gonna sleep with two girls
I'd want her to be the most different. Mm-hmm. I went out with a mom and then the daughter
No, what but?
The mom nothing happened. She wasn't into me, but then with the daughter I made more progress which first
Yeah mom and you met the daughter. I met the mom through the daughter. Oh
You were as at your that's
sleazy. I'm a bad boy.
No, but for real, we were at lunch
and like it was a craze.
It was sort of a move like I was
probably twenty three and
the mom was like forty something.
And I asked her out of it.
And she said yes.
And we went out on a date.
How how do you even 23
and 43 might as well be a hundred
year difference?
There's a there's an additional fun fact that I'm going to tell you off the air cuz I don't want to dox the people
But you'll and you guys will enjoy it. So it was a crazy age. Did you have to like talk to the mom?
You're like, I I actually I was like I want to go on a date with you. I
Was like can we go on a date? Can we hang out? Like are you a mom guy?
Do you not like that's it not historically but I guess at this time I may have been
yeah, but then how does like and then?
Like would that have been awkward if you like ended up marrying the daughter
Yeah, it would have been and I don't know that that could have been possible
You know, and I think we were both fine with that. Okay, I missed that confidence
I tried that with a fort like a milf one time and I just absolutely got bricked
I just I got no progress.
She had nothing to do with me.
And then afterwards I just felt like such a fucking idiot.
See, that's like the biggest lie is
you gotta shoot your shot.
Yeah.
I believe that.
I just, and also I just kept rolling with the punches.
No, you don't.
That's okay, cause you take that L
and then the next time you like crush it.
You don't, don't bathe in your failure. He'm still thinking about it. Did you bathe in your failure?
I did but I felt better about your fact that I tried you did so yeah, it was a net positive
Yes, because I would have been more mad if I hadn't tried because then I'm if one of the biggest obstacles is the mom
Not like thinking you're serious. You need to overcome. Well, there's no way you were serious
I was a hundred percent. Where'd you take her out on the date? We went to Barbunia in New York City. And you paid? I paid. And I would
say it was the least successful date I've ever had. Did you have
her laughing? We enjoyed each other, but it was like pretty
clear that she was not interested in me. Was it a pretty
noticeable age difference physically? Yes, but this was a good looking mom, obviously.
And I was young looking for sure.
I was a young looking 23.
And so you met the mom through the daughter?
At a lunch where it was like the daughter, her mom,
my friend, his mom, and we were all at lunch.
And then I was like, can I have your mom's number?
Ha ha, it's so funny.
And she's like, ha ha, that is funny.
And then I was like, you texted the mom asking if number? Ha ha, it's so funny. And she's like, ha ha, that is funny.
And then I was like, texted the mom,
asking her if I wanted a date.
Was it like a reluctant yes?
So that girl liked you from the get
and then you started, you went on a date with her mom.
Yeah, and she didn't hold it against me.
She was like, I can't believe you're going out with my mom.
But then you went out with...
That turned me on.
Yeah.
I know, I know.
But yeah, then the years went on and probably like five, six, seven years later, I don't know. I don't know. That turned me on. Yeah. I know.
I get it.
I know.
But yeah, then the years went on and probably like five, six, seven years later, I ended
up spending some quality time with the daughter.
So did you, what did you, when you were finally dating the daughter, were you like, hey, you
know?
Dating is potentially more than it was, but we like spent time together in that way three
or four times.
Hmm.
You know what I mean?
And was it brought up?
Probably.
Yeah, it would almost certainly have to be.
But nothing happened with the mom,
so it made it like less bad.
If something had happened with the mom,
it would have been more difficult.
You kissed the mom?
No.
Didn't you kiss the mom?
Nothing, nothing.
Who was more attractive to you?
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The most interesting part is that's a pretty solid thing
to have on the stat sheet.
Mom, daughter, dates, at least.
Solid.
I've never done anything that cool.
That's pretty cool.
Yeah, and there used to be stat sheets. Yes.
Of dudes in Panama City Beach in 2015
had stat sheets and no one I knew,
but I've heard about the stat sheets
that they had to check boxes off of.
And these are literal kills.
People were talking about.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Hilarious.
Like what's an example of a stat
they would want to check off?
Oh, it was bad? Oh, bad.
Are you like shell shocked? I'm thinking about it. You're talking like a Vietnam. Yeah
Boys were evil. Now. It wasn't me but like
Yours, but if you were surrounded by evil truly evil
and they're saying like young men are young the people are
Devolving with like the technological era and like being online. No, this was much worse
Yeah
Anything else
No, thank you for coming out to Zadies. Oh, yeah. Thank you to everybody came out was really fun
Great, you know to Julio did did fantastic Thank you did is all wonderful
It was a good time. Yeah, you stick with the veggies. I
Expanded some more. I added I added new veggies. No way. Yeah
Veggie hour I'm going to try to get a veggie hour
You might have to get you might get to the point where We have to get a fantasy veggie. No you run
No, dude. There's so many really yeah, I was like I'm on my wick every like tab. I have open on my safari
Is a different type of veggie
Was that cartoon the veggie veggie tails? That could be a new year special yeah
No That's not true. Nah, nah. That's different.
Laughter
Laughter
Laughter
Laughter
I'm kidding.
Alright, God bless.
Thank you, Julio. Thank you.
Kyle. Oh, that's not so...