A New Untold Story - A New Untold Story: Ep. 267 - ABC's

Episode Date: December 2, 2021

|| A New Untold Story: Ep. 267 - ABC's || The boys discuss Thanksgiving, hanging with Matt & Kim in Austin, Nick wearing a leash as a child, KB's journey with islam + lymphoma, DM's, red flags, kiwi's, & much more || Full episode also available on YouTube!You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/anuspodcast

Hey, A New Untold Story listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen to ad-free on Amazon Music. Alright, A New Untold Story, Owen, episode what? 267. 267, and I think it's about time to announce... You can't. What? You can't wear that.

I can't how? You can't wear that. Because it looks like I'm doing it. You can't wear that. I can't how. You can't wear that. Because it looks like I'm doing it. You can't wear that. I can't wear. Take that off, please. Am I not rocking it? Because that's not the point.

It's not a style move. I'm not trying to get points from you or from GQ. You can't wear that. It's just something I have to do now. You can't wear that. Please. Owen, back me up. It's just something I have to do now. You can't wear that. Please. Go on. Back me up.

What? My cap? It matches your outfit really well. Really well? That's not the point. Is that Tommy as well? It's not Tommy. I'm not trying to look stylish or cool.

And we went over this yeah but you walked in here wearing the hat and as soon as we started you switched as soon as I opened my mouth because I forgot yeah because you reminded me hearing your voice juxtaposed to me reminded me of the vast difference in our beliefs the vast difference the piss hole you're thinking of the vast difference in our beliefs. The vast difference? The piss hole? You're thinking of the vast deference. The vast difference between you and I. Which is? Our whole life.

Our existence, our beliefs, our trajectory. What follows us. And yeah, this is going to be one thing you're going to have to get used to. You're going to have to adjust to it. For the people that are watching the YouTube, Kyle, what do you, what, what is different?

I'm wearing a Muslim Bengali. You can't. Okay. All right. I'm just, I'm not going to be able to look at you. I'm not going to be able to look at you That's better Doesn't quite match as well

Kyle for the listeners what are you wearing now I'm wearing my backwards cap That's a little bit better I think Alright So i feel like i don't we're not good at breaking news i don't know how else to do this though but owen everyone else like pre like pre announces that they have an announcement yeah and i think that's cliche that's an announcement itself um so i guess we're just gonna have to people have guessed people have theorized it i saw it on the anus subreddit it's not a financial thing no patriot

patriot yeah it's not about patreon because we don't even we're not bought into that yet no we don't even know if that's gonna be our method no it's i don't think it will be um i know fuck it uh we quit yeah uh itchy scratchy dry toilet paper and we now use dude wipes and uh i put in my two weeks to my ultra soft my charm charming charming i quit several months ago you you relapsed i'm guessing wasn't my fault you're talking yeah i did relapse and i have not been sitting pretty and it wasn't your fault. How? I was at a friend's and I went up to him. I was like,

let me guess. He didn't have any dude wipes. Yeah, he didn't. And that's what I asked. I was like, Hey man, like you're out of dude wipes in there.

Can you just toss them in here? And he was like, what? Just use the toilet paper. And I said, bite your tongue because, uh, well he,

he did. He was having a, he had a seizure right after. Um, but as soon as he came to, I was like, you need to buy some dude wipes. He said, aren't they expensive? Honey, no, they're not at all, but what I can do for you,

give you a deal. You can use code ANUS15 for 15% off at dudewipes.com upon checkout. What a deal. What a deal that is. Alright. Let's play a theme song. Guess. Is this when we play a theme song after the first ad? Cool.

Is that your reply to what I'm going to say? No, you're just going to say, like, no, that's a new untold story. Hey, is that story old or told? No, baby! That's a new untold story. A new untold story. It's a fresh, big untold story. A new untold story.

Kyle? How was your Thanksgiving? Owen? Good. Break the wishbone? No. Oh, on my flight back from Raleigh to New York City, there was a girl sitting next to me. Yeah.

I look over. Well, I'm spreading my legs. Her kneecaps are touching. Yeah, yeah she's sitting i can see i can see every move on her phone okay what are you saying she pulls up our podcast really yeah no swear to god okay so in my head i'm like what do i do what do i do how do i do i say something do i present myself in some way? Do I just let, do I just let it go? What did you do? It didn't happen. Oh fuck. No. I'm trying to think what I would. Yeah. But for all the people that are listening to our podcast that showed us like their Spotify wrapped, very appreciative. I haven't liked any of them because I'm only liking Riggs tweets right now.

So if anybody looks at my likes, they're going to just rigs tweets but i do appreciate that greatly um my mom came into town because my dad already lives here and she's been like more nervous than normal she's been very very protective my entire life she uh she credits it all to when i almost got kidnapped in chicago the first and only time i've ever been to Chicago, a guy tried to grab me. My mom freaked out and ever since, she's been broken. When was this? I was one. Oh, you were an infant? Yes, in like the front of the shopping cart. Like, you know, when you put your legs through, the guy tried to pull me out. But,

that was a long time ago. And I don't think I'm that kidnappable anymore. Are you trying to guess what I'm saying? You're mouthing what I'm trying to say to you. No, not yeah huh no well we're filming we'll be able to see it yeah we'll play it back so what happened when she came into town recently fuck off i don't like that she gave you a police baton she gave me one too i know she gave one for me and one for you and kyle go ahead and you don't need to hit the button oh that's embarrassing look at that that's pretty awesome what would she want you to do with this lug it around in like a holster this

is very true owen uh yeah she first off she's so protective she also put you on a leash embarrassingly laid into life into puberty into puberty i'm i fuck up am i gonna call my mom two episodes in a row you have to her only defense is i don't even wrist to wrist wrist to wrist was her only defense and that just makes it like a handcuff you know but it was like hot pink kind of sexual it makes it sexual yeah and she was like drat i was i was in sixth grade and i think you start puberty in sixth grade don't you weren't fuckable. You weren't. Why not? Hello?

Ma, say, you're on the podcast. I'm just going... I want to bring up... Because Kyle wasn't sure if this is true. Kyle said relax. Okay. When I went to New York for the first time. No, it's not true.

What's not true What you're gonna say now Ms. T What isn't true He I did not wear a leash on him But you had the leash and we wore it To the plane and then we got off the plane

And I was in it Well you did wear it around the city Did you wear a leash at any point in time? It was... Around the city? It wasn't around his neck. Of course not. But what was it around?

Well, that's a leash. It was wrist to wrist. Yeah. Oh my God. And you made me wear it. Yeah, I know. It's like a handcuff, Mom. Nick, you want to draw?

No, I don't. How old was he? Yeah, you do. I was like a handcuff, mom. Nick, you wander off. No, I don't. How old was he? I was too old. How old was he? How old was he? Yeah. Maybe six. That's great. I was not six.

You were not. Mom, I'm six years older than Anna, and she was with us. She was. And walking. Okay. She was in a solar. So she was with us she was and walking okay she was in a solar so she was at least two I think I was double digits no because I was in um

thanks mom love you very mature for your age that's why that's yeah that's why but I wandered off no I've said you've been protective since Chicago. Yeah, that's true. That man wanted to buy you. Yeah.

What? All right, Mom. Well, that doesn't make it bad. All right, Mom, I love you. He was propositioning. Yeah. So I was double digits. I think I was 10.

You said kidnap. You never said buy. He wanted to buy, I guess. Oh, so he didn't. I was one. I don't remember. He was trying to snag you. He was civil about it.

Trying to make a transaction. I think it's worse. What was the offer? It's definitely more demeaning somehow. Yeah, let me buy your son. No, just try to take him. Yeah, you're right. It is more demeaning. I'm going to pick something up from the

ground and then you can try this again. I'm going to fumble for it for a while. You want to try that again? i'm gonna fumble for it for a while you want to try that again like a real man no are you one of those pussies you're gonna talk to me first huh shut up but anyway my mom's been very protective of me obviously and so she came to new york she got the citizen app and for like my my area of New York and she'll just it's been freaking her out. She literally moved to New York once you got hired.

So your parents both. Yes. They live in the Upper West Side now. They do. And so I know she she came and she brought two police batons, one for me and one for Kyle because we live in the same area. She's always been protective of both of us. Yes.

I remember I went I was at your house over quarantine. I think you had too much Sherbert and fell asleep and I was leaving. This is, it's actually true. I got sick to my stomach. I had too much Sherbert. You were gorging on Sherbert. Yeah.

And, um, she was like, let Nick know when you get home, if you make it home safe. Yeah. I live in the same village, the same Hamlet is.

Yes. And I was like, all right, he's asleep. So how about i just let you know she was like yes facebook let me know and did you yeah i remember i got home and i was like hey i made it home very soon after you left my house seconds yeah yeah she was like that but yeah she was like what what she was like really and i was like yeah i'm home she was like okay dot dot dot and i was like what she was like i had nothing i just i should have kissed you it wasn't say it wasn't like a romantic it wasn't sexual she should have kissed me goodbye on the cheek have you seen all the comments about how your mom sounded like a phone sex worker when she picked up? I would never give her that satisfaction.

And my mom texted me afterwards. She was mad. She jealous? I listened to the episode and Kyle's mom sounded very pretty. I mean, she sounded like she had dementia. Did she even said it? Your mom? Yeah.

She said, you know, my memory. Yeah, she did. But she was like a hot dementia patient hot dementia yeah but they exist she brought two of those metal police grade batons you will love it yeah and my mom will text me in the morning expect you to do with it i know like wear it she'll put it in your pocket she'll text me in the morning making sure that i have it with me and i have to show a picture of evidence that I have it. And it's in my backpack. And she'll be like, that's not accessible enough.

I'm just like, what do you want me? Where do you want me to put this? She was like, if somebody comes at you, you're not going to be able to unzip your backpack and get it. I mean, this would kill. This is heavy. Was there anything you can hit? I used to LARP as a police officer. What?

Well, my neighbor. I know somebody else who did that. My neighbor was a cop same yeah it's a kyle thing you wouldn't understand um wait your neighbor was a cop he was a cop duane taylor oh yeah um he would have like his kids who are my age and he would take us on ride-alongs with another cop and we would go into like liquor stores and stores that just sell booze and I would have to try to buy it.

Yeah. And they would arrest them. So you would like... They sold it to me underage. But it wasn't like an arrest. I would get paid for it. Yeah. But it was like a ticket.

I'm not a rat. You are a rat. I'm not a rat. That is a rat move. I did do it. Well, it was easy money and no one ever even remotely fell for it because i was 17 and looked i looked like finn wolfhard if he was like auditioning for

the gummo role a little boy you looked like a little boy everyone was just like no like where's your id and that was like a caveat i couldn't like show that i had to show them my like learner's permit id that was like i was just getting humiliated yeah no rat shit so did you get paid if you didn't no they gave me up front okay that's in that's looking back like that kind of fucked up what why because some of them like were like guys from our high school that oh yeah you went to school with these kids and you're trying to get Justin Linden. He he every time he fucks, he fucks so often. Every now is like Justin Linden. He wasn't like letting me know every time he fucked. But indirectly, his his body count from like three like degrees of separation was still like astronomically high.

Yes. Just when i heard from a friend of a friend of a friend of his yeah it was it's secondhand pussy yeah yeah like he told like you just knew but now every time he fucks he has triplets he has two sets of triplets and then twins he did have a one set yeah he did three three two three three two it might have been three two three but yes he it's, I don't know what it is. But his bust to kid ratio is still crazy. It wasn't like, oh, fuck, the one time I bust, I have triplets.

He was busting off of him. He was busting so off. And he wasn't like a sexy boy. No, but that's not who was getting the most pussy. Who was? It was like the dirty guys who... Oh. Yeah.

Basement guys. Basement guys. Basement guys. They would have a ton of pussies, but like their girlfriends were always like, they always had like big feet. The girlfriends always like were like clunky women. The girlfriends were clunky? The girlfriends were hot. The basement boys' girlfriends?

No, the one was. I know exactly who you're thinking of. A basement boy. And if you're in the basement of our of our of our high school, that was like welding and car repair classes. Gotcha. Gotcha. Gotcha. It's for the kids, but they would have like a black market of like Mountain Dew down there

in big Texas and big Texas cinnamon rolls and they would heat them up if you pay them extra dollar. Yeah. Kyle, what else? What else do you want to talk about? Spotify wrapped his fire. What is it? Like no skips.

That's not true. No. Read it. No skips on mine. My, I'm, I can't even share mine because I got anthems, bops and classics. That's it. The ABCs. The ABCs. And you're D E F death.

If you don't fuck with my shit. And guess what, G? The next time you try to say H-I-hi to me, I'm gonna dap you up, J-K. Hold this L. And guess what, M-N-O-P? I'm gonna make you look like a QR code. A big-ass square with a bunch of dots from my from my gun

stu meet me in the stew psych i'm trying to v trying to vw x and y z X. Y. Z. And the Nobel Prize for Improv. Holy shit. Nah, but I have like anthems bops and classics untouched by the veronicas is an anthem

jubel by klingon is a bop and the sound by the 1975 is a classic then you have that all wrong the sound is a bop the sound is a bop the ver as a classic. Then you have that all wrong. The sound is a bop. The sound is a bop. The Veronica is classic. And I didn't know the second one.

Jubil's an anthem. Why haven't you shared it on social media? You did? No, I didn't. What are you afraid of? I ironically posted a story of me fake replying to her, but I've been doing that all day to cover my ass but no but you posted that just so girls would message you 100 your instagram stories are scientifically just to get dms from girls completely strategic

you did the puppies you do like i try to add like a layer of irony yeah but i want that to be the theme and then but that you know because the boys won't Yeah, but you mean it. I want that to be the theme and then, but that, you know. Because the boys won't clown you, but you're still getting the intended purpose. Yeah. Just post a selfie of yourself. Like a genuine, really good photo of you. I bet you wouldn't get, would you get anything? You do the same thing.

I do the same thing. You do the same exact thing. Yeah, of course. We're all doing the same shit. Why not? I'll just google search like a noun and then i'll post the first result that's my that's my thing yeah yours are a little too weird you think so yeah like what like you don't know you like posted the color blue once that was

horrible have we talked about that posted the color blue um it was like the google reserve like search for what what was it navy blue no i just i googled color and it was like the third result i don't know why i didn't pick the first one i just posted it on instagram i was like i love this color and then a week later summer 2020 like june or july yeah and then a week later everybody's posting black squares and uh it wasn't a good look to post navy blue when that was all happening as my most recent post. And the caption was like, I fucking love this color, which was just really bad. And I just got comments on it like, this is like, this is poor taste, Nick. Yeah, blue.

Cops, yeah. Blue cops. I'm still really taken aback from your ABCs there. That was good. That was the funniest thing your ABCs there. That was good. That was the funniest thing I've ever heard. Really fucking good. Kyle? Owen?

You guys love to booze, don't you? Yep. I know you do. Oops. Toss me a tinny. Of what? What do we got? Waterbird. Give me a tinny. Of what? What do we got? Waterbird.

Give me a waterbird. Where are they? For the one time. I think we drank them all. Shit. Because we love them so much, Kyle. Don't you? The canned cocktails that you get at a grocery store or convenience store?

Near you? That are near you? Kind of outing me right now. What? You know my faith. I don't think you know your faith. Don't clown. Give me one fact about your faith.

Yeah, I'm a cafeteria Muslim. I will drink booze. Will you fuck? I will fuck. Will you fuck? Will you stone? Won't stone. Will you stone? Won't stone. What?

Do you pray? Do people still get stoned to death? I don't think so. Dave almost did. Yeah, he almost did. No, but like if I threw one rock at you and it killed you, that wouldn't be stoned, right? But no no do people still get executed via stone maybe maybe is it one big one is that just gets you or is it like

a bunch of like small ones last stoning it's a bunch of small ones one time i killed literally killed two birds with one stone. Yeah, but was it one throw? They were mad close together. That's what they don't talk about. Was it two throws? No. You did not kill two birds. They were very close together.

How many birds have you killed? A good bit. It was like an airsoft thing, though. Somebody was stoned February 3 3rd almost a year ago and that was like the the most recent no april 30th uh no they're that's still going on that's horrifying do you have do you disavow yeah okay that's good uh anyways water bird a good can cocktail you can find them anywhere i personally like the uh the ranch water kyle it's uh refreshing gets the job done gives me the perfect buzz it has me riding high after a few cans and it's it's good like

everyone is doing seltzers and that's been the that's been like the theme the past two years if you are a a company a brand that does beverages in any way you're going you're going to do a seltzer that's what you do water birds start it with seltzers end it with seltzers yeah that's right putting all of their mental energy into seltzer into seltzer and they're're mixing their tequila. The Ranch Water is an Austin-based cocktail that's

spreading. Austin-based. It's become an nationwide boom. Was it you or me who almost fucked Kim from Matt and Kim at South by Southwest?

I think you know very well it's you. So, okay, Kim was me and you went off to Lake Travis with Matt. You guys run at one of those like pedal boats. He's you. So, okay, Kim was me, and you went off to Lake Travis with Matt. You guys run at one of those, like, pedal boats.

He rejected you for Ryland from Cobra Starship. So you almost fucked Matt, but you actually didn't. You thought you did. And I almost fucked Kim. You almost fucked him? I almost fucked Kim. You didn't almost fuck Matt. No, of course I didn't almost.

Okay. Just making sure. But you went to Lake Travis with him. You thought that was like an intimate invite. Then it was just, he was using you because you went twos, but you Venmoed him like 75. And he already got one for free. He had a discount code. And then you guys like pulled up

and like met up with cobra starship rylan dickinson and he it was game over for you what do you have you had to get an uber back we try to go into these podcasts with an outline of what we're talking about just a very loose skeleton you just always just flip it no you said austin based i thought the last time you and i were in austin i almost fucked kim from matt and kim couldn't remember if it was me or you it was me and you went off with matt i did i did their tequila is from jalisco mexico it's very good guys go get it at a convenience store a liquor store near you water birds can cocktails yeah um i feel like we should address the elephant in the room the elephant in the nodes oh what what other what elephant in the room did you think i thought

you're doing like a hindu like a some type of buddhist reference and you're against that one of the two yeah jesus no uh your health people have been concerned people have been Jesus. No. Your health. People have been concerned. People have been commenting on the tacos and titties account. About my cancer. Yes. This is a whole different thing. Tacos and titties.

That's a thing now. That's a thing. TNT is suing them. They sent them a cease and desist. That's right. The Ted, Ted, the Turner National Television Group. Yeah. TNT.

Yeah. TNT, the channel. Which is where I had my first bison. Ted Turner's Montana Grill in Columbus. Look up their menu. They sell bison nachos and bison burgers. You had your first. The place Big T was.

Big T loves that place. No, he wasn't telling you about Turner's. Yeah, he was. He is an Atlanta boy. So maybe he was. Don't point. He wasn't telling you about. Why are you pointing?

He was telling you about a different place. He was telling you about a local place. He wasn't telling you about Montana's Grill. Stop pointing. Okay. Stop that right now. Yeah. I'm just tying loose ends together.

Cancer, Kyle. Yeah. I'm just tying loose ends together. Cancer, Kyle. Yeah. Do you want to talk about that? Do you think it'll be helpful? Because you've been happier and more spry than ever. Right. Because I honestly, no lie, I think I might have cancer and I'm ecstatic. It's a win-win.

First of all, don't jinx yourself because this would be sad if it's true but i don't think it is yeah well i have lymph nodes that are so not like other people's they're not like other minor painless they're hard they don't move when i touch them i get night sweats i get itchy all over my body look at the i have every single symptom of non-hodgkin's lymphoma every single one except having a single one you don't it was like a light bulb moment i was like oh yeah this is what i have and you found relief in that yes you've been like i brought you a fork for uh uh stir fry that you got and you thanked me by just dancing dropping it low in front of you

yeah sure yeah you dropped it low in front of me is that a new like is that part of your happy like what's going on just an update no i may have cancer probably do seems like i definitely do so i'm just living and what else have you done to? It's the first time I've ever actually lived. What are you doing differently? I'm like replaying scenarios from my past and like what I would have done. I would have fucked Kim. And I'm giving you roles too. You would have fucked Matt.

So my parents came into town for Thanksgiving. You went to North Carolina when you went to Long Island? Yeah. How was North Carolina? It's dismal why it's live i mean it's growing rapidly the research triangle yeah but it's like the new south cities it's all suburban sprawl with like carbon copies of the same homes the five-on-one like apartment complexes. It's not walkable. Your parents don't live in an apartment complex, do they?

No, but that's like what the whole new development. You played Little Nephew? Yeah. Peek-a-boo? Played some Peek-a-boo. He's getting a little old, isn't he? He's getting a little old for that. Yeah, 35 months.

That is a reverse peeve of mine. What is? When people complain about, oh, don't say he's 35 months, just say he's two. Or don't say he's 25 months, just say he's two. Why? The level of developmental difference from a 25-month-old to a 35-month-old old both two years of age is out is gigantic yeah but why wouldn't you just say two because 25 months to 35 months is the equivalent of like like age 12 to age 17 right but for the lay person they don't really give a fuck about their developmental growth. They just want

to know how old the kid is. I think you just may have some, you have just a different frame of reference. I think it was a fair point. It was a fair point if somebody's in childhood development. Yeah, but I feel like, you know, it's just from a parent's point of view. Like, yeah, he's 25. That's why

he is 25 months. He's starting to, he's only using two word phrases is that explains it but whereas a 35 month old would be put using full sentences is he using full sentences minef yeah yeah in jargon okay i would transcribe it what's his favorite what's his favorite is it like that Forrest Gump scene? You're seeing if he says sentences and you look at your sister and you're just like, is he like me? The train table is conveniently placed.

Yeah. So we have a train table for him and I did the dozen. You intentionally did it in that room. To wait for like, cause I knew somebody would make an autism joke. Luckily we had a question that we had the doc it took like 10 rounds someone finally did so i like pan the camera to show my nephew's train table and you were like you went to a less comfortable spot to like be in the vicinity of the train chair made of whisk it was what like a whisk chair like wicker wicker yeah

whisk is what you mix i was thinking of pancakes because we also, yeah. That's for a different day. My mom was like devastated. She was like, Kyle, people now are going to think that like I kept your childhood train table. That's not what I would do. Like, please like clarify that it's your nephews, your two-year-old nephews. Two? 35 months. 35 months. Okay. Yeah, your two-year-old nephews. Two? 35 months.

35 months. Okay. Yeah, so that's good to clear it up, but we were lucky enough to get a question where it was the good doctor. I don't even know what that is. Freddie Highmore, autistic doctor. Yeah.

Is it Freddie Highmore? You know. The autistic doctor? Yeah. Yeah. I just kicked that camera. I hope that didn't fuck anything up. Fuck.

Not that one. Not that one. Not that one. The one closer. How long do you think my legs are? You have sneaky long legs. It's not even sneaky. It's out in the open. Have you ever slept with somebody who's died?

No. Me either. Not that I know of. Probably have. You really think so? You think so? I mean, yeah. Probably not.

Have you ever slept with somebody who got married after? Yes. Kids? You get jealous? What did you think about what if? Once I fuck you, you're off the... Off the what? What?

You're not a potential. I'm not going to fucking... You're not a potential wife or even girlfriend after I fuck you. What do you... You won't date girls that you fucked? Are you not going to fuck your own wife or girlfriend? Yeah, but once I fuck you, then it's off the table. Marriages? No relation. you won't date girls that you fucked? Are you not going to fuck your own wife or girlfriend? Once I fuck you, then it's off the table.

There's no relationship. How did you date that girl for like three years? I dated her first. So you started dating and then you fucked? Really? Is that true? So you would never date a fuck, but you would fuck a date? Not necessarily.

But once I fuck you, it's off the table. Whatever you want out of this isn't going to happen. But then how are you ever going to get married? It's a red flag. You're not, you're just not answering my question. It's a red flag. If they fuck,

if you're going out fucking me, what do you expect? How do you expect me to react to date you? Yes. No. Would you date a girl who just fucked me? No. Exactly.

What if I said yes? Then I would question your... Your worth. Damn. Damn. damn damn that was funny that was actually funny but honestly though i would like you got to remove yourself because a lot of you guys are just so drowned and by your own ego and think oh is this girl do i want to marry or like build a life with this girl who just went out and fucked me wow i think you have very poor self-worth that's not that you don't think that it's a red flag if a girl fucks you yes but don't you think you're charming and funny that you just

fucked her like isn't that you're right now don't don't try to bring up double standards he's not that he's doing the what you're saying is double standard if you go out and fuck me, then what else are you going to do? Oh, you think they'd just fuck anybody? No. Now you're making me question my own theories. Yes. That's the idea. Is this my problem?

I thought that was just part of the code. The guy code. What? You don't fuck you don't wife up somebody who's going around fucking you wait so you're waiting you don't wife up you'll you'll you can fuck a girl who's going around fucking you but are you waiting for like a crush i don't know what you're saying but if you don't if she's going around fucking you are you going to actually try to build a relationship with her isn't that already god knows how many other times

she's gonna fuck you she's if she's gonna fuck you once she's gonna go around and she's gonna keep fucking you yeah and then you want to actually like have a relationship with her that is a relationship isn't that a part of just a part of a relationship i don't know i just don't want a girl who's fucking around with me so how what's your ideal girl when i think about it now when you spell it out to me, it is weird. Like you should, that shouldn't be an issue if she's fucking you. Yeah. But to me, it just like, it's sleazy. So yeah, I guess I get it perfectly.

And I, you understand that? Yeah, man. All right. No, that's a good theory, Kyle. She gets to know me. We go on some dates and then finally after a while she just gives in and fucks me no willpower no integrity and if she does that one she's probably gonna keep doing it what was the first no willpower she's no willpower

like are you saying you're irresistible? Yeah, like we get to know each other. We go so long without fucking. We're just talking and getting to know one another. And then finally, she gives in and just fucks me. But she's vulnerable, no willpower. Stop saying that. What else would she? Yeah, if she does, if she gives in that easily

it doesn't seem like it's that easily what do you mean gives in yeah like she's doing it because she wants she went so long without fucking me and then abruptly she's like all right i'm gonna fuck him now oh what else are you gonna do like if that that that's where you drew the line what do you mean where she drew the line i don't know she just picked an arbitrary moment in time after knowing me for so long i was like i'm gonna i'm gonna fuck him now yeah that's called getting to know somebody and then then if she does that she gives in that easily and abruptly and spontaneously what else is she gonna do if say we do start dating is she gonna just keep going around fucking me yeah it's something to think about it is just really really something to think about

you know what else i like to think about cuts clothing good good guess kyle what are your thoughts on cuts cuts clothing the best in the business. Thanks, Kyle. Thanks, man. I mean, shit. They are. Anything else you want to add? You don't want to add how they changed work attire? They flipped the idea of work attire on its head?

They did. Come on, man. No idea of work attire on its head. They did. Come on, man. They fucking flipped it on its head. They'll make you look right for work, for play, for recreation. There it is. That's right. Why waste time wondering what to wear

on your holiday events when Cuts has you covered so you can look your best this season and every season after? My favorite is the classic t-shirt but you can't really call it classic it's timeless it is timeless but it's not a classic yet the technology it uses in the uh innovation is is all not even modern it's post-modern it's post-modern it's custom engineered it is weird to call it a classic. Yeah. I mean, it's a tri-blend still, but it uses, you know, custom engineered fabrics. And it's soft and buttery. And guys, you can go to cutsclothing.com, C-U-T-S-clothing.com slash A-N-U-S to get

15% off. So you can start dressing like a... Is that from Cuts? This? Yeah. This piece? Yeah. No, this is the Viva line.

The KFC Viva line. Yeah, that's right oh shit yeah that's a that's a is that a barstow indoors yeah that's nice awesome um anything else you want to talk about kyle did the viva fall off of that viva fell off not i mean the literally not hypothetically viva did not fall still part of the brand yeah yeah um anything else you want to add today i had that guy who dm'd me do tell yeah um he said he wanted to watch you and kyle fuck me in the ass but then uh he blocked me after he sent it there was a typo yeah that's why he was so embarrassed because there was a typo he just like opened he came out with a gay fantasy and he messaged it to somebody that he dreams of getting fucked and then he's like oh oh no i'm so embarrassed what did he spell wrong

um ass was it just one s i was still trying to get the hang of lying and he chose the easiest word to spell he could have chose fucking which automatically autocorrect to ducking he could have like said like a punctuation point yep but no you went with ass there. I don't think anyone has ever misspelled ass. He wrote arse, but he wasn't British. Oh, there it is. He was so embarrassing. I was going to think I'm British.

Nice try, kid. You'll get him next time. I wish we had a camera for Owen because he just shook his head after he said ass. He knew that. I wasn't the one my phone's under the booth i can't yeah i can't prove it yeah i had the dm oh so it's that's a true dm though many did block you but it wasn't because of a typo yeah yeah i mean um that's one

weird fantasy to have. Was it drunk? What time did he send it? Yeah, it was like three in the morning. Yeah. So he meant it. He did mean it. It's a crazy thing that happened.

But it wasn't like a burner, too. It had like normal amount of followers. What is the average amount of followers? I'm so cheap. 300 or something. Fame. Yeah. Yeah. They're just statistics to me you think black people have ever said kiwi out loud

what do you mean it's not like that's far from racist i think there's some words you can't just say that and make well that's far from racist but what what there's like certain words that you can't imagine somebody else saying like kiwi i can't picture um like can you think of a black person i'm trying to barry sanders yeah but i can't picture he's like one of the few that i can picture saying he's so he's a petite man who's like really uh yeah he's good he's probably so he probably has but like there's some people that you like they have never said kiwi and they know what it is maybe yeah yeah just never said it so that stemmed from somewhere in my life i think it was at dairy queen

and the person i don't even know if he was black he may have just been like really macho okay like hard nose like rugged blue collar and i think i wanted a strawberry kiwi arctic freeze yeah and um i like had him order it for me and he just did. He refused to say he kept like pointing to it. No idea. And I was like, Kiwi. That's it is like a vulnerable word to say out. Yeah, I won't say it. It's like in the same vein as like, I don't know the answer to this question.

Yeah. When you're wrong. Yeah. So, yeah. Oh, I don't think I've heard of that. It's in that same Kiwi. There's no like you're wrong. Yeah. Oh, I don't think I've heard of that. It's in that same... Kiwi. There's no hard way to say it. I was afraid of kiwis as a kid.

Because they're hairy in the feel? No, because the first time I ate it, I got it in my eyes, and I thought that happened every time you ate kiwis. Oh, that's fair. It's not a pleasant thing. Too many seeds. It's like the nick of fruit. What fruit are you?

Because kiwi, you never get like a standalone kiwi. No one ever gets a kiwi flavored anything. It's always strawberry kiwi. Are you the strawberry? I'm the strawberry. Which could go with an abundance of other things as well as solo. Almost preferable solo. Mr. Kiwi.

Shut up. Oh, fuck. That's going. Oh, man. That might stick. almost preferable solo Mr. Kiwi shut up oh fuck that's gonna oh man that might stick it's not bad you know what I'm saying though there's other words like what like brie cheese no they

debris like Hurricane Katrina YG the rapper has ever like No, they've debris like Hurricane Katrina. YG, the rapper, has ever like vocally expressed breed cheese or kiwi. He's he's wealthy. I'm sure that's come on like cheese plates, right? No, I'm more thinking kiwi. I don't think he's ever said kiwi out loud all right yeah i guess i i'm gonna try to do some

research and find out the game has ever said kiwi definitely not i can't believe i'm agreeing with 40 has never said kiwi i am agreeing with you 100 on on this is unbelievable. Oh my God. Thank you. We'll be right back. Thank you. We'll be you next time.