A New Untold Story - Cookies Are Good - A New Untold Story: Ep. 420

Episode Date: October 31, 2024

nick and kyle are back off the road to celebrate 420, discuss cookies, timberlands, and logos. Ads: Gametime - Download the Gametime app today and use code UNTOLD to easily score great deals with the new Gametime Picks! Rocket Money - Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to https://RocketMoney.com/UNTOLD. CANN - Head to https://DrinkCann.com and use code STORY30 for 30% off your order of Cann and get free shipping.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/anuspodcast

Hey, a new untold story listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcast, Spotify or YouTube. Prime members can listen to ad free on Amazon Music. A new untold story episode For 20. Pass it. Yeah, episode 420. And listen, I'm not going to not talk about weed. It has had a profound impact on my life, at least. Positive or negative? It's taken me from neurotically stiff to apathetically antisocial.

So negative. No, I think I wholeheartedly recommend THC. Yes. But I full-throatedly reverse recommend abusing it on a daily basis. That's gonna have a lot of people up in arms. Yeah. I always say whenever I'm on panels or doing Q&As,

alcohol has helped me. What are you talking about, panels? Whenever I'm on a panel doing a Q&A. Oh, okay. I must've, yeah, okay, my bad. Yeah. I always say alcohol has helped me make memories, but weed has helped me appreciate those memories.

That's like a 2009 closeted boy Facebook post. Yeah. What conference was that? It was like a conference where you're like, oh people do drugs, like it's the opposite of AA. You're trying to get people into drugs? I have, I have gotten dudes addicted to weed, kratom, and it keeps me up at night sometimes.

Do you think there's any chance a guy you recommend kratom to, it's like their life is ruined? Yeah. Okay. And, um. Like what chance would you put that at? Do you think there's any chance a guy you recommend Kratom to is it's like their life is ruined? Yeah, okay, and Like what chance would you put that at? I don't know and I I don't think I've Recommended Kratom. I think they saw you and they're like this guy's cool Yeah, and I was you know if you consider what I was doing succeeding on Kratom then maybe it encouraged you to try it But I disavow Kratom. The middle of your Kratom obsession is when you had this really beat up suitcase

went to Lawrence, Kansas, and it fell open. And inside your suitcase was like 30 Kratom vials that rolled out in every different direction in the Kansas airport. I think it was 40. Okay. Yeah. A bunch of raspberries, your computer and that alien mask.

But also half of the raspberries were just smooshed in between your computer in that alien mask but also half of the raspberries were just some smooshed in between your computer permanently staining the macbook yes yeah well that's not the era i'm talking about okay that was before weed okay weed has helped me alcohol has helped me experience the world around me weed has helped me perceive the world around me. Wow. Now I appreciate like human skin. I've never taken the second to appreciate human skin. When it's good, it's good. I'll say that much. I'll zoom in on kpop members. boys are BTS that yeah, we're lists show hey, so He looks uncanny. I appreciate like color schemes like dark blue and lemon yellow

Yeah, I appreciate like I'm not not turned on by men with large slender hands That's cuz the weed yeah, it's caused me to have a newfound appreciation. Now I like appreciate. Can you think of a man who has good hands off the top of your head? No, but you know what I'm talking about, like the long hands that are defined knuckles. I lose my last two, they're just dimples.

I'm not a good hand guy. Neither am I. Tiny. I appreciate Emma Watson's defined jawline now. Wow. Yeah. I never thought she was hot. I was just, I was so mature though. She's a beauty. She's sophisticated. She's a sophisticated beauty.

Weed has had not much of an impact on your life. Not in the slightest bit. You've been around it. I've been around it a ton. I've probably been high single digit times Okay, cuz like the first 50 reps for me were awful. Why would you just not stop then? I don't know and But like have that have the peaks outweighed

Yeah, I think it's been like the most net positive substance for me Just like you know, it's made my brain cloudy. It makes me not want to like, go out and see people I love. Um, I relapsed. It's better, uh, you're better as a weed guy than you are a Kratom guy, and then you are a Shroom

guy for a little bit. I was clearing out my phone memory, cause it's very full. There was a video of you in New York. And you weren't following me. I was a video of you in New York and you weren't following me. I was, I don't know why, but like you were staying in the middle like New York City street and you were just going, this isn't right, Nick.

This isn't right. This isn't right. Everything's off. Yeah, I mean. I had to delete it. I didn't want to embarrass you and show it. That was an anomaly. I was never like a shroom guy.

I never did back to, I never did like consecutive days or even weeks of shrooms. I was never like a shroom guy. I never did back to I never did like consecutive Days or even weeks of shrooms. I did it a few times. That was the chocolate bar Yeah, melted in my pocket. I was like, let's just go sit at a bar and this bar. It must have been strobe light night And it was just like 50 of them in there with like a disco ball in the center. That was the worst Yeah, everything was monochromatic like The New York skyline was all beige and I was like, oh no. Is that what you were saying? That wasn't right, too? Yeah, okay. Yeah, did that scare you off of it or did you do it anymore? I've done lower doses of actual shrooms, but I won't do like the chocolate anymore. Yeah, like it's it's too random

What else yeah, so I did relapse after 40 some days in the best way. Yeah? When did you do it? I think I needed it in San Francisco. Oh, okay. How was San Francisco? It's my favorite city visually. Yep, visually, yes. It's so beautiful. I like it. It's really cool because you can't build too high. I think it's stunning. The homes, the Victorian homes, like the colors of the homes, the neighborhoods,

the coast, the Golden Gate Bridge in the background, the chilly weather. The weather is perfect. They got palm trees in the middle of the city. People aren't too, too good looking. No, it's a lot. Everyone looks like a misfit. Yeah. Which I think that's a positive almost.

Not too crowded. Yeah, I love the city. But? There was really no but. I guess I didn't see the ramifications of the homeless crisis. Right. Yeah, I just loved the look of the city.

I mean, it didn't seem too fun for a young man looking to get after it. For women. Oh yeah, it's gotta be brutal for women. Yeah, to get after it for women. Oh Yeah, it's gonna be brutal for women. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know Yeah No, no, but I had I got high and I had like three crumble cookies and it was bet It was that's probably ten thousand calories it probably it was a better experience than anything I've done as a child That's more of a reflection on your child. No it was like it was better than Halo 2 was better than killin

Was it better than griffball? Griffball and halo 3 with the hammers. Oh, yeah, it was better than halo 2 it was better than the beach It was better than hitting a hundred and forty foot home run in Paris, Pennsylvania And then I have to like Experience that pleasure and then I have to like go online and see people hating on crumble cookies Oh, yeah crumble cookies are mid crumble cookies are disgusting Crumble is assumble cookies are disgusting. Crumble is ass. Crumble cookies are cheeks.

And I see this everywhere and I'm like, crumble cookies are, like you said, 750 calorie hockey pucks of sugar and butter. You are biologically and neurologically inclined to enjoy them. You don't, don't say they are disgusting tasting. You can say they make you feel gross, or you're not necessarily over the moon about how sweet they are, but you can't say they taste horrible. People are just hating so, the people are freestyle hating so around.

People are hating cookies now, big cookies. Now they're like, oh, chocolate chip cookies suck. That was the best. That's how you know we've gone too far. People are hating on cookies. Now they're like, oh chocolate chip cookies suck. That was the best. That's how you know we've gone too far. People are hating on cookies. Cookies. Like not just like old cookies, like the newest. New wave cookies. Innovation of cookies. The highest tech cookie. Yeah, maybe it was it was very sweet and it tasted like pure sugar,

but that's good. Like that's going to light up your brain. Crumble has new drops like they're like. And I had a blast with the new ones. Yeah? Oh my God. Were you making audible noises? Yeah, I think so. But I was going from piece of cookie to bed.

Piece of cookie to bed. What? You would eat a piece of cookie, go lay down, get up, have a piece of cookie, go lay down. Micro dosing it. And people are like, oh, insomnia cookies are made. Stop talking about cookies being gross. That invalidates every hating you've ever done.

Let's hate on things that actually bother us. Let's hate on bartenders and waitstaff touching the glasses with the tips of their finger at the top of the glass. Let's hate on when recipes call for three teaspoons instead of one tablespoon. Let's hate on when recipes call for three teaspoons instead of one tablespoon. Let's hate on real things. You don't hate delicious cookies, you just don't. So stop saying crumble cookies are ass.

Holy shit. Do you wanna play devil's advocate? How could I take the stance of anti cookie? Is it right? No, I'm I mean I understand like it's it the only argument you have is how you feel afterwards. That's it Yeah, but don't be like oh the taste was whatever that taste was bad the worst cookie can only be Pretty good right it's kind of like pizza exactly like that could be the debate The worst cookie can only be pretty good. Right. It's kinda like pizza.

Exactly. Like that could be the debate. We could fight if our bad cookie's pretty good or good. Right. You could say crumble cookies are pretty good. And I would still get a little bit pissed, but don't, yeah. And the same people would be like, oh, green olives are great.

I'd say, oh, we gotta have a system here. Like green olives, you can be like, oh, I are great. I say, oh we gotta have a system here. Like green olives you can be like, oh I tolerate them, or oh that's a pretty, that's a decent taste for me. There are some things that just have to settle with, the peak is fine. Right. Right.

So how did you feel after the three crumbles though? I didn't feel too bad. Really? I don't know, this like past 10 days is, are you gonna get fat? Is that your next thing starting getting a little chubby? What about you guys how have you how are you doing? Fucking exhausted from the tour haven't slept

I Sat down on the plane today guy sitting next to me. I just open up Twitter while on the the runway taxiing guy sitting next to me, I just open up Twitter while on the runway taxiing. Twitter cannot, it has to cease to exist. I open it up and the first one is just like, all right, it's Wednesday, that's time for a backshot thread. And then it's just like straight up bouncing on, like not even a big cock. Every cock's getting it now.

Yeah, no, it's on Twitter. Yeah, the Every cocks getting it now It's on Twitter. It's yeah the big cocks haven't gotten to Twitter yet, and so it's just straight-up backshot threads with long but Thin cock yeah, it's like and then it's just the thread of that and then the dude sitting like so close to me He definitely saw me looking at the the back shot thread. I scroll down And I see like a child But the issue is doesn't have like a head and that sucked and I just keep scrolling and it's another fucking backshot thread That's a chick's butthole. That's just and then the child without a head. Yeah, it's like the it's like war

Just the goriest thing yeah in the world and then yeah and then and then I then like the Elon Musk like landing the space thing and catching it I'm like that's cool and I look at the responses and the first response is another chick spreading her asshole she's like he could land it in my butt yeah and the worst is like and I'll add all repliers are indistinguishable from bots I don't I don't understand anymore. Which, like, I think I've been cashing in on compliments that are 100% from bots. Yeah.

It's like, I think there are Barstool-specific bots that just say, like- They have like our names down. But it's so, it's not right. So now I don't know like- It reads like a compliment from like a non-English speaking translation of a children's show right so it's just like Nick Nick click really impressed me with his his razor-sharp wit today

Yeah, I keep getting mo Mook's L will not be temporary. Yeah, it's... I don't know. Yeah, so there's no more app for me. It's truly, I don't know, it's dead. It's still good for some things. It's still necessary for some things. Yeah? I think we need like an app for like text-based

Conversation yeah, yeah, but it's few and far between should we take over threads What's going on on threads? I never got in on that. I don't know either Reds is the one with the Instagram Twitter. Yeah, I don't know I see like little ads for like if you're scrolling Instagram you'll see like a little though like preview threads. They'll show you three quarters of a thread and Then for me, it's always just like a chick who's posting a photo that is like would post on our yeah Yeah, it's just it's other instinct more probably more porn Twitter's Twitter's porn Dead like drone dead tots yeah I've never seen a dead above 12 on Twitter.

And then it's like RFK's voice. And if I catch that before lunch. It's hard to recover. Pass. Good God. Good God. Yeah. It's a, yeah.

The porn replies will get you in the most weird places. Like I follow a bunch of map stuff and I'll be like, Oh, cool map thread. And the first thing I see is a girl on a Spiderman. It's going to be a girl. It's always a girl. it's some sort of hero. Yeah. And she'll be like, do you think you could last with me?

No. Let's continue. Yeah. And then like I'm scrolling, it's always no. And then I'm scrolling, scrolling. And then it's again RFK's voice, choke back, I hold back vomit. It has me wishing for more tots. Yeah. And just a fucking nightmare

Yeah, I've started blocking. I started muting because I think it's easier, but then that like they'll make it I Have started blocking, but now I get all I get all I do is watch block Josh block That's all I have man it's Again I feel bad talking about it because it only makes this whole ordeal. Yeah, I mean it's horrifically sad it's a Autistic boy documenting his descendant to horrific alcoholism on a daily base on an hourly basis. Yeah, that's sad But on an hourly basis. Yeah. That's sad.

But? On paper, he's living a fantasy life for somebody his age. Yeah. And he's a cunt about his trips. The biggest. Like he spends the night in the hospital like, oh fuck, I hope he doesn't die. And I'll open up TikTok and it'll just be like

Him sipping a Seagram's escapes, and then it would just be like enjoy your nine to five pussy It's that too yeah Yeah You've are you following closely I? Go in and out like I've been busy lately. He's gonna be on Sam Hyde's show I I Think I know what that means yeah, I know who Sam Hyde fish tank That that's like a good thing. Yeah

No, he's doing fish tank. Oh my god. That's like the big brother. Yes, that's Sam Hyde does Sam Hyde is uh if you don't know I like I think he's funny. He gets his picture He took the ugliest selfie of all time. It was one of his things and it's used People online submit it for every mass shooting yeah, and it's on news networks like this is the guy yeah I'm not I love his Ted talk on the paradigm shift Yeah, he comes on that Roman Roman plastic and he's like state mandated homosexuality must be a thing He's squatting on the Instagram handle SNL. It says he have SNL When Instagram first came out he just said at SNL and hasn't let it go. Oh, that's awesome

Yeah, yeah, but I think he's a he's one of the few people that I find very funny and talented and also equally horrifying Yeah, he scares me He started boxing and getting big he said his punches His punches have the power of every Chinese person But he only speaks in an Irish accent when he box No his punch that he unlocked that's that he can he has the power of every Chinese person is a strong punch have you seen it like for a Small percentage of me not double digits, but close believes it. Oh, yeah that he somehow channeled the power of every Chinese

Well, he's just so barrel chested. He's built like that's the 1930s He is bill weight lifter. He's a tire iron Yeah, I like this that is yeah, that is like the ideal body in the 20s. Oh My god Yeah Yeah, you saw else oh Yeah, unbelievable Oh Yeah, unbelievable What anything else about 420 the history of 420 you know why it's called 420 is it though is it the the the the police code

No, it was five high school kids at San Rafael In Northern, California, they're called the Waldo's because they hung out by a wall. Oh, cool. They had a treasure map leading they found somehow a treasure map leading to an abandoned cannabis crop a mystery secret of cannabis crop. So they would meet every day at 420 p.m. at the Louis Pasteur statue at their high school. Louis Pasteur from food preservation popularity. Oh, he pasteurized? The guy who pasteurized. No way. Yeah. And they would... Oh, is that the Louis Pasteur statue? a code at school would be like for it started as 420 Louis And then it became just 420 was the code for we're meeting at this statue to look for this weed

this cannabis crop and then it just You know gradually became just the day nature code on heat in general, 420. No kidding. Yeah. It's fun. Did you guys like celebrate that? Where you from? I was never a weed guy. Ever. What about people around you? Was it a thing?

Um, yeah there was... I think in high school it was like weed and booze. But I never was like... I was just yeah, they would it was kind of off-putting like Yeah, but when you it's the polar opposite of what you are trying to do when you're drunk Yeah, or high yeah like adding organization to smoking weed is the pop is backwards

Yeah in Colorado people would go crazy for it, and it would be this huge you just go like that's an altitude That's not like a like a celebratory feeling was people just getting together that smoke weed constantly all day every day like right It doesn't fucking matter. We're gonna smoke weed and then what? Yeah, the dudes that celebrate 420 are smoking weed every single day right you know who it's big for is the drug dealers Oh, yeah, when you were selling weed Oh, yeah, or 20 like now were you ripping off kids? Oh, yeah in high school. It was a big It was a big day We'd always get announced and like so like the sophomores that paid 25 bucks for G and then in college

It was like you had your phone on you all day. How much is a G typically like 10 bucks. Oh Damn, you know I got a mook. How's that boy dude dare worked on me immediately? G typically. Like ten bucks? Oh. Damn. You're a bad guy, Moog. How's that boy? Dude, D.A.R.E. worked on me immediately. Really? Yeah. With the melted girl on the couch? Dude, everything worked on me. Like I was horrified of all of it. I was horrified of weed. Yeah, that's what they did. I didn't drink in high school. I didn't drink alcohol in high school. Really? Yeah. Or my freshman year of college. That was your fear of like getting in trouble or I don't know man I think it was the unknown Yeah, the feeling

No, I love smoking weed when I was younger It's awesome. Yeah, I mean it's I guess it's like a magic potion to enjoy everything more Yeah, I think what you're missing too. Is that like sometimes? Probably like one out of five times you'll get uncomfortably anxiety That sucks. That's not worth the game. You don't understand like the white knuckling through it is almost part of the experience Yeah, that's the biggest cope in the world. I would just rather not do that But you you like learn some shit at least you tell yourself I don't yeah that's again that's really bless your

soul retarded yeah I've never learned shit I was experiencing like just full blown panic but usually you like for me at least you would panic about something first time I smoked weed I had to call my mom I was afraid You called your mom my mom really yeah, wasn't that the thing you should have been afraid of your mom knowing yeah I just I was I felt guilt it hit me. I thought I was dying Yeah, you feel mm-hmm. I've only had that once and Feeling like you're dying yeah, that's oh you try yeah, you made a Facebook post oh

and feeling like you're dying, yeah. Oh, you tried, yeah, you made a Facebook post. Oh, I was talking about the time Jeff D. Lowe had to drive me to the hospital. No, the same day you made the Facebook post. The Facebook post? Oh, weren't you, no, no, you were concerned about people writing on your wall for your death? Yeah, I was just like, write RIP on my wall, please.

Yeah. You were like texting people. No, I wasn't, because I was too panicky to even do that but I was in my head I was like I gotta call my parents. I think you might have told Jeff that then. Yeah I was kidding. I don't think you tried to jump out of his car dude. I did.

It gets, dude I'll tell you this of all the hard drugs I've done weed is the hardest to traverse when it goes too far. That's what I'm saying like when people say like, oh weed isn't dangerous. Well it's not dangerous lethally, but it has given me the, it has been like my most fucked up days of my life. Yeah. All right guys, it is one of our favorite apps.

Good friend of ours, Game Time. Yeah. Barstool's ticketing partner, you guys know that. We love getting out to live events, sports, comedy, the theater. Rudy, you're going to Billie Eilish. On the 13th. You got tickets so good you'll be able to feel her recoil. Mm-hmm. The shockwave of her recoil. I'm hoping to be knocked back. At least your bangs will move. I promise you that. Yeah. I'm hoping to be knocked back. At least your bangs will move. I promise you that.

Yeah, I can't wait. I'm excited. No, and it's so easy. You can go there. There's Game Time Picks, which is sitting at the top of the screen. You can browse the best local Game Time Picks. They'll curate that for you.

Really nice. What are you waiting for? Go buy those Billie Eilish tickets. Go buy some Blackhawks tickets. Go see Javon Carter in the Chicago Bulls. I love reminiscing about like a concert from a few years back that I didn't end up going to because I was like sleepy and a little bit hungover except psych. No one does that.

You think you'd reminisce, you talk about the concerts you did go to. Yeah, maybe not everything was perfect, but you did something and you have memories that will last a lifetime and you put yourself in a position to give yourself the top moments of your life. This is no lie actually. If somebody, like I'm like, oh I like this band, they're like, oh they're crazy, they're very good live.

I think you're cool as fuck. I think somebody who has a lot of concerts under their belt, Tech Guy Andrew, he was telling me about how he shit his pants at Slipknot because they pushed him up against the rail. I was like, oh, you're cool. Yeah, he was telling me about how he shit his pants. Shit his pants, but he goes everywhere.

He stacks concerts and he's so happy about it. It's a fun thing to do. I keep a notes app of all your experiences. Yeah, log your events. Download the Game Time app. I shit myself at J. Cole. What? You shit yourself at J. It's great. Log your events. Download the Game Time app. I share myself at J. Cole. What? You share yourself at J. Cole?

Yeah. One second. Download the Game Time app today and use code untold to easily score great deals with the new Game Time picks. What time is it? Game time. That's code untold.

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I don't know why I'm just being so honest. Um, I Paid for it for years and years and years for like a Netflix of comic books and it's expensive Shouldn't have been doing it because I wasn't taking advantage of it Kyle you're probably paying for the splice app over like four different credit cards. I know, I used Rocket Money and it gave me a lot of money. It's the best, it has a dashboard, it gives you a clear view of your expenses, so it helps you save money by canceling unwanted subscriptions, but also it keeps you

on a little plan. I know. It has over five million users and it's saved over, total of over 500 million in canceled subscriptions, saving members up to $740 a year that's crazy that's like a lot of people's rent a lot of people's half rent mm-hmm one free month of rent stop wasting logo yeah that's about stop wasting money on things you don't use cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to rocket money dot-com slash untold it's rocket money dot-com slash untold. It's RocketMoney.com slash untold. RocketMoney.com slash untold.

Would you sit on your phone for 30 seconds if you were promised $75? Yes. Exactly. Exactly. It takes 30 seconds to do this Rocket Money stuff. Easiest selling point right there. Shout out to some weed people, some weed named people. Who we got?

I'm obsessed. Tad Weed. Who's Tad Weed? Tad Weed is the 140 pound place kicker on the 1954 Ohio State Buckeye National Championship. Alright, champion Tad Weed. Tad Weed. Tad Weed. Tad Weed. It's like, I just looked up Weed's surname on Wikipedia. Yeah.

I was like, this guy can't be too interesting. But yeah, he's a national champion place kicker. He got, and he went to the Korean War. No, no, no, he didn't go to the Korean War. He went to the Steelers. Oh. I'm often confused. Played for one year, and then they replaced him with Gary Glick

Who was a place kicker and a defensive end? Oh? Yeah, Gary Glick Swiss Army knife Gary Glick Went to high school then went to the Korean War okay, then he said fuck it. I'm gonna play defensive back, kicker, linebacker, and starting quarterback for Colorado State. Holy shit. Then he gets drafted to the Steelers because his coach just wrote the Steelers a letter.

They're like, you gotta draft this guy. You gotta get Glick. You gotta, yeah, so they did, and he's the only defensive back to ever get drafted one-one. Whoa, he went one-one because of a phone phone call then they just used him as he wasn't good They used him as kicker he went five for 18 then he got Cut they didn't cut the one one they cut the one they cut click and then tad weed went on to invent the weed tennis Racket, what's the weed tennis racket the world-renowned tennis record. That's a little bit bigger, so it helps beginner

Do anything every I've researched so many dudes from like the early 1900s So wait the two big tennis racket guys are tadweed and dickhead and and dickhead. Yes, it head is the other And then there's another tadweedweed who's a world renowned. There's two Tadweeds? There's a Tadweed who's like a world renowned jazz professor. There's two Tadweeds. And every dude I look on Wikipedia,

it's like he has four to five different unassociated ventures that would earn him a statue in a town center. Every dude that has a Wikipedia page, their early life is filled to the brim with tragedy. Oh my God. They'll always have a drowned sister. They'll always experience a house fire.

And then there was always a mishap with some sort of animal. Yeah. Or like, either a drowned sister. Always a drowned sister. Or like, five of their siblings died of a disease. Yeah at age four to five Both of their parents never make it to their graduation never never they always Play six different sports the dad will always die of a disease that was very easily cured soon later Like heartbreak

He went to a like a fever or the blues Like a real bad case of the blues the Mondays like took down a lot of famous dudes dads And I'm looking up these stupid weed names like no way someone has the last name bong and then there's dick bong. Who's dick bong? We oh wait. I briefly mentioned him on the yak but Dick bong is like the greatest major bong fighter major bong is the greatest fighter pilot ever He was America's ace of aces. He shot down 40 Japanese aircrafts, and he was like, he was dog shit at accuracy. What?

He couldn't like fire the gun, so he just got as close as possible to the Japanese planes. Was his vision bad? He would just like pretty much play bumper cars with them. In the air? He was undefeated. He was all power, no technique. Like during his training, he would like fly his plane, like, right next to the street on purpose,

and knock down people's clotheslines. His fucking plane? And just prank people. Major dick bong. So he was an actual dick? Yes. But how he died. Oh. He was testing a jet fighter in California and the fuel jet malfunction

And he crashed and died on August 6th 1945 the same day That Hiroshima was bomb Dick bong It wasn't like the the newspaper headline was atomic bomb hits Japan it was atomic bomb hits Japan right under that in just a Just a slightly smaller slightly smaller text is jet plane explosion kills major bomb

so he got the He didn't even lose No the headline to he shared a headline with an atomic the atomic atomic bomb dropping that's dick bomb major bong is what was it was the major bong Luke was that an ill Adelph oh yeah fuck yeah girl though yeah okay what is that a type of that's the cool bong that's a cool guy bong It's showing me that They still selling to the delfs oh yeah

God damn, that's a major bong. Yeah, it is How many other weed sir names can there be? JB stoner Okay, what did he do use them? These are all Wikipedia page guys. Yeah? He's the most racist man of all time. Okay, that's Literally all time oh look at him an imperial wizard of the KKK an imperial wizard That's like he called himself that he's like the voltum the Lord Voldemort of races He was a roving white supremacist and domestic terrorist. He was doing the traveling show, he was doing the circuit, he was a road dog. So I was like this guy has to be from so long ago. Now he ran for governor of Georgia in 1970. Oh God. Under the slogan, he's the

candidate of love. And he says, I love white people and I love white children So during the campaign he described Adolf Hitler as too moderate He said that Jews are vipers of hell and that black people are extensions of the ape family. Oh god damn so Hell sounds sick now It does too moderate. That was a 1970 that was after we sent a rocket to the moon like Wait, what's what's date apprehended he got arrested oh?

For bombing like a church or a mosque or something I forget Jesus fucking Christ JB stoner Holy shit Holy shit. Pol Pot of course. Yeah, Pol Pot, one of the worst guys ever, right? He's gotta be like the closest to Hitler. Yeah, he has a lot of kills. I think he's in the millions for genocide. You wouldn't have survived.

But look, look at this. Perfect skin. He has nice skin. Good skin. Great skin. What do you mean I wouldn't have survived, Pol Pot? Because he was. He has nice skin. Good skin. Great skin. What do you mean I wouldn't have survived Pol Pot? Because he was, yeah, you would have been dead. Why?

He was getting everyone with glasses. Shut the fuck up! He was killing, he was, that was his... Specifically, if you had glasses or could speak a foreign language, basically show any, like, um, inkling of intelligence or of intellect, he's killing you. Glasses? He doesn't want to be overthrown, yeah. He would kill you if you had glasses.

He would kill you if you had glasses. What's his body count? 1.5 to two million? Yeah, in a short span. God damn. Yeah. And it wasn't like that, like Pol Pot isn't even like a, you know, like a Cambodian

native Name he was just that was his name. He was the name he gave him to himself. Yeah There was David Tree David Tree the world-renowned actor in the 1930s from goodbye mr.. Chips So David Tree was just like a stellar actor So David Tree was just like a stellar actor in movies that were like Oscar nominated. Goodbye Mr. Chips. Then he became the best royal pig show in the world. Jesus fucking Christ. He was a supreme champion in royal pig showing.

And then he became a world renowned lily grower. So you know people just did things. They just threw world renowned and best ever so willy-nilly But you could become famous for growing really good lilies back then I think yet to like a dozen people because like lilies were like A form of entertainment back then that was like the like that was fun back then just like having a lily I think there was nothing else to do like this is fun. Yeah, guess. It was the equivalent of having like a Nintendo DS. I believe that. Looking at it like a sea of purple.

Yeah, purple was hard to come by. Alright guys, little small break to... But it's worth it. Cause I'm gonna talk to you about CAN. Say HI-H-I-G-H to CAN social tonics they are a seltzer with a little bit of weed a little bit of THC I Not admittedly not a weed guy the two milligram can

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CAN products contain less than.3% delta 9 THC that is derived from hemp. Do not claim to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease and have not been evaluated or proved by the FDA. There's a woman named Kush Jumbo. She's in the, she's modern. She's in The Good Wife. She's in the show The Good Wife?

Yeah, an actress named Kush Jumbo. Okay. Damn. You were talking about, I know why you text me now. You text me, have you ever seen Munchie? Munchie, the ultra stiff, eternal creature. The puppet from the movie Munchie,

and Munchie Strikes Back. And Munchie Strikes Back. But not to be confused with the puppet from the movie Munchies. You know about Munchies strikes back but not to be confused with the puppet from the movie munchies You know about munchies now That's about a similar scary puppet and they keep on trying to cut him in half But he can he just doubles and he just wants to fuck this one woman they do all these forms of munchies are chasing this way is a different munchie because it

That sounds like this munchie as well. Wait really, but I was talking about that munchies That's a sad see him looking up her fucking skirt. You're right right. He's looking right up her pussy That's a movie munchies. Yeah, they he goes different than munchie munchies is very different than munchie He's a sex pest And they keep cutting him in half and he doubles and so it's an army of munchies and they realize if you electrocute him he turns to stone spoiler his goal is to fuck this one woman okay like he gets back to America and he discovers like I think like alcohol and like pussy and he just has

to have it where is he from I think is I think he's from a cave called Munchies of Munchies Cave in Peru Yeah This makes total sense I kinda wanna do a watch along Yeah, I thought Munchie Singular was crazy, Munchies Plural was even crazier Yeah They're both muppets

Develop a love of women attacking people, beer and junk food They just become cool These dudes rule yeah oh god I put this this alien creature it sucks oh yeah how's he suck he loves beer pussy and chips and fun guns what year did that come out 87 yeah I think we should do we should just do a bunchy munchy watch along Munchies well you well, what's munchy about I just know about munchies No, he's real stiff and every all the people are horny in them. There's a way she is horny, too No, I think the humans are horny so the inverse

But that's a that's a family movie. She's dating the creep the mother's dating a creep As looks weird too family movie she's dating the creep the mother's dating a creep as weird to movies in like the late 80s early 90s were just about puppets wanting to fuck women yeah just like on human the Marvel movie Howard the Duck have you seen that no it's a Marvel property Howard the Duck he's one of their heroes and he wants to just fuck a woman. He does fuck a woman in this movie. I think that this was a big trope growing up. But like women also items that wanted to to fuck and eat it from the gremlins.

At the end, there's a girl gremlin and the guy, the the antagonist of the film is like trapped and she like puts on lipstick and he's like, OK, and I think she starts sucking his dick. Like puppets were, puppets got the most pussy in like 88 to 93. Yeah, that's what we were raised on. People give Brian a lot of shit. Griffin?

I hate that I just, yeah, look, this is his love interest and she's really into him. This is a Marvel movie just yeah look this is his like love interest, and she's like really easy This is a Marvel movie dude. This is crazy. It's not animated. It's live-action It's a it's Marvel I think he's in He's in Guardians of the Galaxy This is fucking insane I Think he's the only Marvel superhero to like get look and she like wants him way more than she he wants her

There's always that yeah, it's all like the puppet is always more reluctant Right because it's cooler if she wants to fuck him yeah, I think that he sees them mm-hmm that guy's a pedophile Yeah, he's the principal from in real life. No. Yeah, he's real life pedophile You know how they cut him out of the Beetlejuice sequel no they had him They like in the movie I don't think anyone cares about spoilers, but like in the first scene he dies and then his character He gets eaten by a shark and his head is just gone, so they just have him Oh, it's just a guy they just have him walk around the movie movie headless. Yeah He was ferris Bueller's principal. Yeah

People keep telling me I look like him it is hurting me not now it pedophiles age poorly. Oh God yeah, Jeffrey Jones Yeah, I think Howard the Duck like there might reboot it. I don't know if he was a superhero. Is it is it a marvel? Yeah, yeah, it's Marvel? Yeah. Yeah. It's Marvel. That duck. That duck. And George Lucas executive produced it, who was Star Wars. Yeah. Yeah. That was a weird era. Like I said, people give Brian shit for dating. Yeah, people do get Brian Sher. I mean, sure, Brian. Like Brian dated Seabreeze Puterschmitt, that's a dog.

He dated Ellie, who was a dog. That's two, like he's dated more dogs than the average dog. Yeah, you're right. So it's not like he's not in, he's categorically not into fucking dogs. As a dog, he's just exploring options. And like his taste in women wasn't like, it was all over the place. He fucked fucked a trans woman he fucked a trans woman Ida Ida quagmire's If I had Cheryl tees he fucked Bonnie

He thought Bonnie fuck Joe's wife. Yeah, he fucked um oh Padma the Indian he fucked Shauna the black woman he fucked a blind girl There was Jillian Jillian was the long-term girl so yeah a lot of humans, but I thought Jillian was hot Jillian is hot But one big red flag what? She fucked a dog Yeah Yeah, she was fucking him The blind woman didn't the blind woman didn't know but I feel like you would she kind of yeah

She knew I feel like kissing a dog I'd be like that's a dog and not a man, but Or like somebody would tell you right? I would probably if I saw a blind woman with a dog first of all I would assume it's helping her Not fucking her And then secondly she'd be like this is my man boyfriend. I'll be like that's a pooch Yeah, I would inform one of the parties like, tell the dog this is yo dog.

You know, she's a person, right? Yeah. Service dog is. His roster is better than Jeter's, it's better than Jeter's. Yeah. Mm hmm. Top to bottom. More variety. Google like, can you Google is dating history? I already have it all. I want to is dating history? Like obviously is that who's Jillian Jillian's 11 I was in alphabetical order. Oh my god He's okay. He fucked more than uh an Ted and how I met your mother. Yeah, yeah Bath and probably fuck Lauren Conrad

He did I remember that he didn't fuck Lois Okay, wait right I would have heard about that Bathroom girl? And he fucked Lauren Conrad? He did, I remember that. He didn't fuck Lois. You know there's no way, right? I would have heard about that. I think he just ate Lois out. I think he ate Lois out. From the back, yeah. From the back. Who'd you hear that from?

Um. Yeah. Oh my, yeah. He might, he's better, he's better than Jeter. And then go to Padma, like she's a sleeper. Padma, oh yeah. Where do you meet Padma? I forget, where did he meet her? Indian tech support girl.

Indian tech support girl. Oh she was there too. Okay. In the episode Road to India. Okay. Yeah, Brian was getting it in. I blame the women more than Brian. Yeah, so the women were committing a crime and you know dogs aren't bound to the legal system.

And there's a lot of nuances in co-op that like kind of blur the lines of what's, you know, yeah. Yeah. Wait, what click that YouTube video? 10 best girls. Brian Griffin has fucked honorable mention.

They has dated Family Guy video essay. Oh, I'm'm gonna get a lot of heat for this, but oh Of course, it's a fucking furry sprite 40 minutes 40 minute breakdown. Let's get in arrest to this person Let's go to the middle see if they're actually I Could have gotten over the fact that you just oh, they're just playing scenes Yeah, yeah 40 minute breakdown of just the top 10 he's dated number eight Who is it who's number one? Who is it? Who's number one? This old woman? He did it at... The trans woman was Quagmire's... Dad, Mom.

Dad, Mom. Yeah, that has to make things like that. People would have to hate Brian. I would. I'd be so pissed. See, Shaq is finally getting hate See Shaq is finally getting hate Shaq is finally getting hate your dream come true It's not my dream come true. It was just like I was just early to the game. You're early to dissect the yeah Because he said he wanted to see Angela Reese dunk from the bottom angel Reese Yeah, he wants to like see her wear less clothes and dunk. Yeah That wasn't the reason I was hating on him what were you hating on him for this is like a is not want his needs to be

relevant yeah every day he could just go off into the sunset as Shaq the basketball player mm-hmm he I think he's terrified I don't know I think he's charming and funny yeah he is funny he's a good personality but I think he's terrified. I don't know. I think he's charming and funny. Yeah, he is funny He's a good personality, but I think he's addicted to this. Yeah at what point did you think it was too far was the DJ sets? Dude, yeah, he's not he's not interested in performing dubstep music at music festivals. You're insulted by that Yeah, he stepped on the craft that you love. It's like dude like that like that no that's just like a telltale sign like he He's so afraid of losing the next generation like Yeah, in terms of relevance that he has to do like he doesn't want to stay up until 4 a.m. What did he say little-ass shorts? No he's funny

Know who else does that is Bill Murray He does yeah, Bill Murray always tries to show up places. Yeah Just to show up. Yeah, who just walk into weddings disheveled. Oh, that's yeah, like He like had to see Hawk tua like he had to go meet up with her in Nashville and shacked it There's another like every time like a girl goes viral. He like DM them. Oh, yeah, not every time probably most one time goes viral, you like DM them. Oh yeah. Not every time, probably once. Most of the time.

Mm-hmm. Should we give him a call again? Oh no. No, no, no. Imagine you in them little-ass shorts you had on a Wild N Out show dunking. That's like, that reads like an Indian DM. Yeah, that is a, that is a, that is an admin,

like an altitude of horniness that is rare. That's for India Shaq and Brian Griffin yeah, it would Brian Griffin could get angel Reese. I think he has the most he has insane Yeah, he does I Could see him. Yeah, you can relate well. I'd stand for sure This is also coming out October 31st that's Halloween. It's Halloween. What's your costume? Oh fuck? Yeah, I think I'm just gonna use our Zelda costumes not Zelda you go. You know it goes Yugi

It's the only one I really have yeah And like the process of like going to get a costume is fucking horrifying to me like I don't know it's like I get it I'm scary. I get anxiety doing that it's weird apparently they're selling out of ghost face scream masks because people are like, chicks are attracted to that killer. They're attracted to young Matthew Lillard. Okay.

And I think some of them like to say as a joke, like, oh, scream, but I think it's because of the young Matthew Lillard. Yeah. But I guess people are fucking in them now. People are attracted. Also seen that on Twitter. Seen that on Twitter too.

Yeah, Michael Myers mask like oh really yeah It's not on it. I don't like it. It's weird and then cuz they're wearing the mask the fool dude is in frame oh Yeah, yeah, yeah, so it's like a girl getting just crushed and then behind her is Michael Myers his arms like this So you guys are watching? I'm scrolling. If it's a Wednesday backshot thread, I'm going to finish the thread.

If it's like the thread symbol, one of like 64. Yeah, I wouldn't want to. Yeah. And I don't even know when I do it. I like click. I like I'm like, oh, there's another one. And I click on it. And then I'm like, what am I doing? Yeah, I'm at the DMV.

My timeline so fucked. I pulled up my Twitter on stream and just tits on stream. So he pulled up tits on stream on YouTube Yeah, it's still there. So go go find that. Yeah Dude, and they're also they're remixing with the flash now. They're flashing you backwards That's mooning. No, they start with the boobs out and then the video starts and they put it back up. Yep I've seen that too. Yeah, well, that's just somebody getting dressed. That's not a flash Yep, I've seen that too. Well that's just somebody getting dressed.

That's not a flash. But I think the intent is they are flashing. Oh, they're starting tits out though? Yes. People are getting so depraved that they want the anti-flash. Right. This is innovation I suppose. Porn is so readily available.

It is so readily available. Wanting it on Twitter is crazy. Bringing a child into this world like that It is almost unavoidable Yeah, yeah, it used to be it used to be tough to find my friends you ever my my friends I didn't do it because I was a pussy, but they used to steal porn from the airport Airport had porn in the magazines the duty-free Yeah

you just go into the- That's crazy. The news, and then they used to have porn in there, and then inside of those magazines was a DVD, and my hockey boys would jack those all the time. And then jack off. Yeah, the... Would you? No, I wasn't capable at that time.

Maybe kids are gonna be desensitized to sex, and then have a healthier relationship with it. Wow. If they're just showered with fucking porn. Or porn breaks their brain. Yeah. But Halloween, the day that Harry Houdini died. Really, punched in the stomach?

Yes, he got punched too hard and fucking died. But apparently he had appendicitis and kept avoiding it. And then he's like, I can take any punch in the stomach, no one can hurt me. And this one dude just rocked him and then he died. Who was one of the guys you did a Wikipedia walkthrough with? The writer. Was Ernest Hemingway?

No, HP? HP Lovecraft Yeah, it was a ghost writer for Harry Houdini. No Harry Houdini paid him to write a book about debunking like I Thought he was also his ghost writer maybe but yeah, he paid him to write something for him interesting Yeah, he had another crazy crazy life. He's actually kind of fucking legit Houdini. Yeah Oh, he wasn't doing actual magic tricks, right? He was just like surviving drowning he like his one of his biggest things was that he would go way out of his way To disprove people that were like I'm a real magician. I can do real magic

He was a stunt man then right and he like lived by that. He's like no, I'm for real. I just do this I'm crazy. Oh So people think his death was a hoax because it was on Halloween Yeah, I didn't get as far into that but some people think that like some of it was a hoax and everything and then He then made a deal with his wife when he died that if he could communicate he would and then for ten years after that his wife would do a seance on October 31st and They would have like a coded message and then after after 10 years, they finally got the message, and then later on she said it was fake.

But now people are still doing them. There's a dude in Chicago that does it, Neil the Necromancer. There's a Necromancer in Chicago? Yeah. Necromancer deal in the dark arts, death, necro. Bring people back to life. Yeah, you don't want to, you don't really want to cross path

They're a worse warlock in my opinion a necromancer. Yeah Necromancers are bad news. Yeah, so yeah, he every Excalibur nightclub every Halloween He tries to whoa look at the shape of that guy he posted with Yeah, that's a looking individual What is? Houdini done a lot of stuff. You like elephant disappear. No, he didn't no he didn't but that was his like thing How the fuck did he do that? That's kind of binary either did or didn't and there's proof visually he did

But in literal fashion was like a trapdoor No, they had these like curtains and it was sort of like a optical illusion ears But the stuff he did with the handcuffs and everything was for real. They would like handcuff him, put him in a barrel and put him in water and he'd just be out. Yeah, and there's a lot of tricks that he doesn't, they don't know how he did it. But he had like a bunch of like tools and tricks like with the handcuff ones he would use a false thumb and then would have lock picks in there. There's no way the technology was there, like you could see a false thumb, like it probably didn't look good.

Apparently not. But also apparently you can just call the Pittsburgh Steelers and say, draft this guy 1-1, and they just do it. I think being famous was a choice back then. Right. Like, I'm just going, OK, if plumbing doesn't work out, I guess I'll be famous. I'll be the world-renowned something that I try.

Yeah. Right. But he would use tools and stuff, but even with that, the stuff he did was insane. He would hold his breath for three minutes. It was still very difficult. Three is like, eh, you're good at that, but not like you're a magician.

Yeah, I wouldn't be like, my friends have to see this. But 10 or five. Back then, dude. Three? I get it, but my point being is that he still was like, he was like for real doing it. I'd be, we could all do one minute. He broke out a Scotland yard.

That's how he got big actually. He was just tough. Yeah, he was just a bad, bad, bad motherfucker. Yeah. Yeah, and then he started Sam, the Society of American Magicians. Two A's. Yeah, which is pretty dope.

And now it's like a, he just was like collecting crews. Who do you think was the first city to join the Society of Magicians a city? Yeah, New Orleans Buffalo Buffalo. Oh because dudes going over Niagara Falls. Yeah, yeah barrels The whole goal of this thing was to basically dis People that claim to be medium psychics and everything you fucking hated that kind of shit. Oh, then I'm about the I'm about that Yeah, oh, they have a sick-ass logo. He started a magazine just to talk shit about psychics Caught the conjurer and it flopped. Yeah, of course. I wouldn't subscribe to a fucking Psychic shit talk magazine. Yeah, and then he also would just write about how cool he was. It's kinda awesome.

It was like a blog where he would just gripe about people. I'm into Houdini. Yeah, he was a cool dude. Interesting guy. Moog, see if you can find the guy from Gremlins fucking the other, fucking a Gremlin. That was so accepted and I just can't get past that. I'm trying to think of other examples

because I remember just like things and They objects were always getting lusted after did blubber fuck Flubber flubber excuse me flubber all but Flubber like I think fingered yeah, yeah Is it in gremlins to yeah gremlins to? Yeah, dude, and it's like this gremlin is not even like great-looking oh You don't say wait a minute. Is this it let's go towards the very end I? Don't know the bad guy fucks another gremlin. That's just a woman movies were so horny mm-hmm It's always like the all the woman

Ends up fucking the the thing or guy that she wouldn't typically. The earliest one I can remember that is when I saw King Kong. When I was like, is she gonna fuck? Yeah, she was into the, yeah. I was like, is this going to go down? But they never did. That one just wouldn't work. Oh no, she would be like like a flashlight a small one. I

Don't even know that like she would have to be like she'd have to go in his dick hole Reverse it'd be like that scene in the board. Oh, yeah, that's the that's the gremlin that fucked the dude There's no scene it just ends with the implication it's pretty fucking close he shrugs at the camera break water worth wall like a weatherman foam posit a foam posit got left on the shelf where your shoes dudes wear your shoes yeah she I think there's got to be more examples too bad ah Gremlins to the new batch But like what about like in like who frame Roger rabbit she was hot that was she was but she but she but did she fuck any like regular dude I Don't remember. I don't remember like um yeah, he's about to lick her pussy

Yeah, she's getting her pussy lick right now her little grandma push. Oh, this was gremlins. Yeah, gremlins to it's like a cult classic The end with a real script yeah, I mean in retrospect this now Twitter doesn't seem as insane now that we're looking back Yeah, I guess yeah, I mean yeah if I saw like Howard the duck Like throat fucking a chick on Twitter. I'd be like that's too much right yeah That'll be the funniest like If that's the new like Marvel end credits scene But he's just like it's Howard the duck just absolutely getting gagged on dude

Ducks have a corkscrew penis too Yeah, and I think they're Siemens ice cold Ducks have what a cork their penis is corkscrew shadow. It was on a sobe lid It was on a sobe lid I think they didn't have facts on sobe lid they sure fucking they sure did Are you sure wasn't Snapple? Snapple did too Sobe lids had facts to so be lids had facts so be lids had facts Don't remember that did so be love have facts So be stands for South Beach now, so be Liz Liz did not have facts nice if you guys wanted to know

Thank you man, thank you for teaching us that teaching moment Were you thinking with an apple they did not affect What else we got we ought to spot Tim's Timberland yeah, it's gonna be a timberland winner I'm never gonna wear him. I don't know why I did it. I don't know if you like to support them. They're heavy Oh, I won't be able to pick them up. No But we will look cool as hell if we're all in Timbers yeah some butters yeah, they'll be nice Did you guys have fun on your trips? Yeah, I'm glad we did it. It's really tiring It is it just drains me the lead-up

postgame the during I'm snot there was a bottle of pinot waiting in every green room for car Yeah, you said it jokingly like anything we want the rider. Mm-hmm. You said bottle. I was serious Oh you were yeah, I need to get loaded to go on stage which sucks. Oh Kyle had a Freudian slip on stage last night. What happened? He was, we were talking about, we have a sketch that's about the Special Olympics.

That is not out. And Kyle was gonna bring up the fun fact that Jamal Charles was in the Special Olympics, which is true. He had a learning disability. Jamal Charles absolutely went and dominated the Special Olympics, which is true. He had a learning disability Jamal Charles absolutely went dominated the Special Olympics when he was 10 Kyle goes fun fact guys James Charles was in the Special Olympics Everybody's like what think about that ass

Their names are very similar their names are very similar retired, but James Charles just competing in the Special Olympics Probably wouldn't even podium No there should be a gay division I don't know those legs got some power maybe yeah, that's a fake ass., true. We can't go to this again. Gluteo shit. No, we can't go to this again. Stomping on. What? Stomping on eight and a half Tims. You got eight and a half Tims? Yeah.

You size up or down? Scary shit. Stomping on them Burton's. Yeah, bro. I feel like snowboarding in Tims would be like a cool move. Tim Burton's bro snowboarding in Tim's would be like a Tim Burton's this snowboarding in Tim's I you got eight size eight Tim's eight and a half that's gonna look like a tree ornament yeah that's where you can store them. Like lower branch. No, I got nines. We got nines, but. Moog bought women's.

Moog was like, oh, these ones are cheaper. I cancel it. I cancel it. Oh, it's steel. I made some, I made some bets. Oh, did you actually? Were you guys betting on the road or no? You just focus on the stage. It was just two booze just stage just stage. Yeah, I got into the the hockey

There's got to be some good names in hockey Yeah, so this one is a new guy moves in next door and gets in trouble for reading on his porch, okay? What's the big deal a guy can't read nice calm anymore you guys are some sod neighbors What's nice calm? It's a is that Mike mine calm no putting an end to it When you saw nice you were like that's my that's mine calm Yeah, I thought you can. You can't do that. That's the point of this. I'm bending the rules.

Okay, fine. Slam rhymes, David Conf, Matthew Nyes, Ryan Reeves, Brandon Saad, Jake Neighbors. A lot of players that record a point, so that one's gonna be astronomically high, units-wise. But you just can't, you can't pick a name. I can't be like, this one is an astronaut eating ice cream, and it's

Jamir Gibbs There's nothing about it, but his name is like you can pronounce a nice so nigh and conf but Nice is his name. Yeah in mine is what you're okay? It's if the middle syllable I Can't believe I'm getting G checked on this you guys way crazy. You're getting G checked here you guys that's actually so This is this is vanish Q That is that is this is another vanish QA once again on that one. I followed the instructions perfectly Kyle your shoe is cute as fuck there that that's an I got a nine by the way nine width eight and a half length

No. He got the race. Yeah. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. What? Your shoes? No, how is it like a Lego? Like a Lego man, just perfectly square. Perfectly square, same size. Yeah, cause this shoe is so small, it's a Lego. My shoe, my nine, my size nine Tim is gonna be like an ion.

It's gonna be a crumb. I'm gonna be walking around in microscopic atoms that's how small my size nine timberland boots gonna be yeah are you killing yourself right now Kyle it's gonna there I'm gonna just dump it around in Singular oats? Like a little oats, too tiny little oats It's gonna look like that, huh? My men's size 9 Timberland boot is

They're gonna look like two corn kernels, huh? They're gonna be so small They're gonna be so small Be sure to weatherproof them before you step in a man's pore my timberlands are gonna be so fucking tiny they can fit into things unfathomable by I'll be fucking getting stuck in skin pores. Huh? So easily with my tiny shoes.

Cracks in the sidewalk? Yeah. With the cute little laces bowed up in bunny ears and the tiny shoe. Made out of ant whiskers, the shoelaces? Yeah. Yeah. tiny shoe Yeah Be so fucking small little oats just two tiny little fucking oats, dude They're gonna look so small my feet

And they're gonna look so small when they're like next to my apartment door No one's gonna see you. You're gonna have a welcome mat. It's just good. It's not covering one letter No one's gonna know you're supposed to take off your shoes cuz no one's gonna see you you're gonna have a welcome mat it's just good it's not covering one letter no one's gonna know you're supposed to take off your shoes cuz no one's gonna see my microscopic timberland boots I guess there's a shoes on house yeah dude they're gonna it's funny cuz they're like the it's like a big shoe and mine are still gonna be hard to see up close So fucking small right? Yeah Me and Nick's 12s are like aircraft carriers. I don't know I don't yeah and yours. Yeah, yours will be big Dude I don't even know if they could put the tree logo on the side dude They might have to use like a little seed a mustard seed You're not that sure

Just gonna have one piece of tread at the bottom yeah two oats two oats I mean that's a pretty normal size shoe for a man yeah very normal this one is Malibu's

most wanted penis no Malibu's most wanted penis. No! No! Malibu's most wanted penis posting on Craigslist. Okay. NoSack. Wigger. Looking for low mileage. Whoa, whoa, whoa, that's not a last name.

Yes it is. That's somebody's last name. Looking for low mileage Blackwood. Wait, wait. What's the player's name? Who's low mileage? No, that's not a name. That's just part of the Mackenzie we I'm about to make fun of your big shoes did don't Thomas no sack Mackenzie Blackwood

Who was You just added like you say stuff like looking for and seeking all the time, and you're adding filler words, too Yeah, I guess I can't add filler words now. I guess we can you're just mad cuz you don't got none. I've got none I Got fucking none It's too busy thinking of roast jokes for Kyle man Think about munchies I do want to watch munchies To Mm-hmm think about munchies. I do want to watch munchies too I got Shannon sharp on lotioned

Got it gotta be UNC okay take the over on Asheville, Unk Ash, UNC Asheville. That's pretty fucking good. Yeah, that was that one. Oh, yeah. It's not that it's actually now that I'm thinking about it. Pretty much the same, same, pretty much the same. We got a plug about you, shit. Oh, yeah, yeah, Yeah, mostly story live show Wednesday Zany, Chicago

And then Thursday night will be the Brolley City skyline. Yeah, Kyle. Are you willing to try to recreate a Plattson esque? Yeah, I don't know like functionally how difficult it's gonna be we're going to turn off all Yeah, I don't know like functionally how difficult it's gonna be we're going to turn off all Difficult all financial things you can build whatever we could terraform the land Can you not I mean I can help um I played a bit you can terraform you can terraform you build an island Yeah, okay. Yeah But I don't think that you're gonna be able to find the customization you want

This is just like building infrastructure and shit like that, but there's other things we can we can make it work Okay, I've learned the game. I haven't quite mastered. We're doing this for Brawley and every chat will go to Him directly right that's his money. So next week is a lot who take half next week Wednesday's live show Thursday Thursday night Brawley stream goodness and then the week 1114 me and Nick will be doing stand-up in Pittsburgh. Oh, yeah, how you're swinging by right Kyle Dean pop I'm not coming on stage. Would you host I? From that's come on is that on stage It doesn't have to be you could you could host some the green room

I just got to retire from the stage for a little bit. It's fair. It's the show the tour was a success Yeah, it's ruining my life though. Yeah, I'm pumping my body, and I'm being really unhealthy Yeah, and I'm super sleep deprived. Yeah, and I haven't slept in it's not something I can sustain haven't slept in Two two days Yeah, that's It's not good But oh well whatever I don't want to complain that yeah, I just can't handle being busy Yeah, I got one taste of being busy

consecutively for a couple days. We were showing a sketch yesterday to the Boston crowd and Sass is like, this one was crazy because we had to start filming at 9am. And everybody's like, kind of lost the crowd a little bit there. Dude I missed Sass. I missed that everything is such a Everything is the most extreme. You know what I'm gonna bring up We check into the hotel in Boston. We all go out to the club Sash comes a little bit later, and he walks in he's like

What's up with these floors in the hotel room they're, they're wood. I'm sliding everywhere. It's like. He speaks in such extreme. I got out of the shower and I just did have to lift my feet. I slid right to bed. He was like, ah. He was, and before we could say anything, he's like, I gotta go take the biggest dump.

It's always like. It's never, it's. It's the best. He just couldn't handle wood floors. Hardwood, but he was sliding floors hardwood views sliding everywhere who's sliding everywhere You guys notice the floors in the hotel room I Missed a lot. I walked it I hadn't seen it forever and I walked into the green room in the Chicago show and I don't know how this came up

But he just goes oh man. I used to love poppers. I heard that Yeah, I was like excuse. I thought he was a love popper I was like I thought he's being sarcastic and he's like no I didn't but then I found out they were about gay sex And I was like that's always what they've been. Yeah, he just liked the feeling of like a loose ass So yeah, it's good to see him Mmm. There any new drugs What are people doing? Catamine

See people just like mixing different. Okay. Yeah, to see is just like, you know What when you go to when you can win to McDonald's you did the suicide soda? Oh, yeah, which is every soda That's like what to see I think is it's like pink. It's like the drug It's like the drug in Batman or it's like just awesome, but no one really knows what it is and it's a specific color Yeah, oh it's pink as fuck yeah Yeah, hot pink and smells sweet Rudy right on the nose with this one. Yeah, five hours. There's so many articles about yeah Oh wow it looks pretty awesome. Mm-hmm. It's like when you you know those websites We're you can't amine and co

Mdm a mess and they send you like a box where you get like a belt a shirt Oh, yeah, I've always been tempted to do one of those you get like a boutique shoehorn with a pair of Blue like a lot. It's like that with drug. Yeah, you just like get it. You don't know which drugs are in there It's kind of like a Russian roulette Kyle did you try to get into magic as a kid? Yeah? It was buying tricks from penguin magic calm and filming them There's like you're filming your tricks floating a dollar setting a wallet on fire I pay like $90 for the DVD on how to bend forks remember that yeah

That was a scam it was a ski you had to buy specific brand of really cheap fork at Walmart That's what didn't come of forks. Yeah, Houdini bought the elephant trick from some other dude. Really? I think I'd be curious about like that high level of trick buying. That'd be awesome. I am interested in. Imagine if it was like an auction, right? Like somebody does this trick and then the bidding starts. That'd be a sick show. Yeah, I know. I would buy some illusions.

Yeah. I wonder what the most an illusion's ever gone for. I bet you somebody sold an illusion for a million. For sure. How did, I don't understand, like you could just get wild animals back then. You just get a fucking elephant. It's crazy. Graphic designers, there's like,

they put up calls for like people to design logos, and you're not even allowed to submit a bid if you've never made a logo for six figures. Like that's a good quote. Six figures? For a logo? Yeah, oh yeah. Wow.

The chick that did the Citibank logo did it on a napkin in the meeting with Citibank, and I think it sold us one for like 500,000. Oh, so they don't even make it over, oh wow. Yeah, she did it on a napkin, I think. What do you see when you look at that? I think that shit's wack. It's why it's an umbrella. I guess oh Yeah, it is I Never noticed that yeah

That would be in the dude that would be if you were in that realm that would be a nice gig to have Just doodling yeah like and you get the reputation of like my logos are three hundred thousand dollars, right? I'll do it while we're talking to each other Yeah, it's why I'll talk with that yeah, I know I tried do it tried my best You should start making some we should you should do a stream. We do that was one point two eight million Billion no no wait wait no wait. That's a comma no, but that's an acquisition But no that's the logo for eyes that is Billy and that's 1.2 billion you're telling me they bought a logo for 1.2 Billion there's no way that shit is

Yeah, that's a billion dollar logo 210 we like it. Yeah, that's cool to look at look at that. What the fuck says at the Chicago company Hundred mil for a century for a century does that mean that they get like money based on how well the company does I think it's no they're pricing at all. Are you kidding me? Nick you picked the wrong field buddy BBC going for 1.8 Yeah, there's city 1.5 That one I Pepsi is at least got it like oh, no they have the most pompous brand design like uh

Like you look at their brand guys iced I still do I love looking at brand style guides on their websites Like how you can use their brand what colors you can do with it like Ohio State When I was making designs for Ohio State you couldn't use the color blue And like every every brand has their own When I was making designs for Ohio State, you couldn't use the color blue. And like every brand has their own book of guidelines. Pepsi's is the most self-sucking pompous, they worship that object as if it's a god. Oh. It's very strange.

That's the campus attitude, Is he gonna worship the logo? I guess so. You just described something I never once even thought of. Yeah. They have like rules and regulations of how to use branding. They're all very strict. Look up Pepsi logo guidelines or something. That's crazy.

Yeah, that. Dude, wasn't I wearing a shirt where you said you designed? Yeah, you were wearing a box of contacts that I designed. What was it again? It's the one with like, it has like a contact in the waters going through it. Yeah. I worked for a brand called Novartis. So you designed a logo for a brand that Rudy unknowingly donned. Rudy was running like a street where, yeah,

like this is how every brand's company guidelines scroll up to the top. Like they have all these rules and it's really insane. And I love diving in them. What are some examples of rules that is interesting? Yeah, like the circles and like the meanings behind like Arcs, it's really fucking pompous pepsi's is the worst whoa yeah They're making this look like it's a Michelangelo But this is how you sell it for a fucking two billion dollars like look at all these meanings But it's a bunch of meaningless fucking circles. Yeah But yeah, no I bought a shirt from a streetwear company that just like ripped that company's logo and just like put it on the shirt and then

He's like I design that box. Oh my god. Yeah Yeah, look at that innovation. It's a timeline DNA Innovation convention and future That's what we're getting that is the shit like I felt but you had to do that and you just had to lie But it's like you it was reverse engineering. Yeah, you don't do that first. No, like oh, here's what I know But then that's how you sell it to these fucking people. It's insane. Yeah, what logos are you like? Damn? They really went crazy This is awesome. Like what's your favorite logos or a brand like whatever they're called. I Like what's your favorite logos or brand like whatever they're called? I

mean the only reason I like Pepsi go back to Pepsi logo like but like just a Back and just look at it No, not that one do they do the Pepsi logo with the wordmark. I think I like the cool shit like I like the meaning Oh, they rebranded it already, but no go to that one and, and the old Pepsi logo is the E in Pepsi, which I thought was a cool homage. You see how the E in Pepsi is the same as the old Pepsi logo? Like with the wave and the E. I thought that was a nice little homage.

I like that Amazon's is like the smile, but like the two letters, it's a smile, but it's the letters connecting A to Z implying that they have everything. Right. Which I think is cool. I never Z implying that they have everything. Right. Which I think is cool. I never noticed that. Nice for telling me.

Yeah. And I think those are nice touches. FedEx with the arrow. Yeah. I actually, one of my favorite logos I ever did was for a roofing company where I hid, like, I loved hiding shit. Is it online? Um.

Um. Um. Let me check my notes. Let me check. I don't think it is. Let me check my drawings. Pussy. No. I don't think it is let me check my drawings Pussy no, I don't It was always fun to hide shit and Look, that's what I liked

Like I like Toblerone. I thought that was weak though. They hid the bear in the mountain I didn't Know that's timberland mook. Yeah, it was just on my mind That was just a tree Toblerone like the candy the big bar Yeah, oh there is a bear in there. I never noticed that Yeah, I can get into this yeah, it's really I but I love looking there's like a I forget the website But it puts it's like a blog where designers go and every time a company rebrands, they post the logo. And, oh, it's called Brand New.

Brand New, search like Brand New Logo Blog. Yeah. Did it go up to the top? Yeah, it's just like a blog where they post new logos describing like why they changed it and what they add. Like the New York Islanders, a lot of people think that logo sucks busy, but like the the color change and it's like there's a it marks where the arena is in the logo on the long on Long Island.

They have the hockey stick right where the eye covers up. It's it points right to where the arena is On Long Island, which is kind of cool, dude the old Buffalo Sabres logo There's got to be a word for this, but you know when you like look at something and you see it completely wrong Yeah, so the old Buffalo one the one that's the black and the black and red one. Yeah, no actually No the click the second image right yeah that click that one the No, actually, no, the click the second image, yeah, that click that one, the 99 one, I looked at that utterly backwards where I thought the gap on the left was the mouth.

Oh, really? And in hindsight, it's just remarkable that I couldn't see. But like, yeah, I couldn't try as I might, I could not see it that way. There was like a logo that this dude made that he sold. Like you could just make logos for things that don't exist and sell them so this guy did one for Spartan us he made his own Spartan golf course and That this was one of my favorite things too. It was like it was two things at once

Depending on how you looked at it Spartan golf course. Oh, okay Like Vegas Golden Knights to they I don't like that. They didn't use a night helmet They used like a Spartan helmet, but it's for the V. Yeah, so that one's a guy swing at a golf club or like an actual Spartan Yeah, love the right. This is something I could easily get interested. It's very fun, and it's a noise meter, too Yeah, yeah, it's like the trail really good shit, but that was never a real thing But I think a golf course bought it and named their golf course that it's a good idea Yeah, so it's just doing everything backwards. That shit rules the eyeball being the gap in the arm Oh, and it's even the face. Yeah, dude

Yeah, that's good shit. Yeah, man. I'm telling you that's yeah, that's um, I appreciate that. It's like constructing. It's fun puzzle, but like Selling them for millions is a scam top to bottom. Definitely. But I guess it's just the companies will pay for the prestige, it's like any luxury product. Yeah, like art, whatever. Yeah. We should do a logo thing.

We should all try to remake the Anus logo. That'd be cool. Or make a new one. Yeah. We can figure out how to hide it. Two different things. Hide two different things in it? That'd be cool. I'll make a new one. Yeah. We can hide, figure out how to hide it. Two different things. Hide two different things in it? Yeah.

That'd be cool. All right. You're gonna shit on us, but. No, I don't, I mean, I haven't done it in so long. That is cool. Sorry for the little tangent. All right. That was interesting.

God bless y'all. God bless.