A New Untold Story - Doug Wanoy feat. Doug Wanoy - A New Untold Story: Ep. 376

Episode Date: December 28, 2023

KB's Dad, Doug Wanoy (interview starts at 20:50). Ads: Manscaped - Get 20% Off and Free Shipping with the code ANUS at https://www.manscaped.com/. Boston Beer Company - Grab a refreshing Twisted Tea today at https://www.twistedtea.com/locations. Factor - Head to https://FACTORMEALS.com/kb50 and use code kb50 to get 50% off.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/anuspodcast

Hey, a new untold story, listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime members can listen to ad free on Amazon Music. My mom's been putting aloe plants on vintage baby scales. You can get them on Etsy from her shop. This is the Chitilian. Wait, your mom has an Etsy shop? Not actually, no, but this is her new thing. Just plants on vintage baby scales.

It's whatever. What makes it a baby scale? Can't she just use a scale? That's a scale for like little babies. It has a little baby on it and that's what you like. You can't stand up straight without support on a real scale. Yeah, but can't she just lay it

flat on a scale like any normal scale? Nah, they're too, no. You need no you need a baby scale too squirmy anyways hey is that story old or told a new untold story episode uh uh thread 376 uh apologies sincere apologies for no for no research on this one no no no it's the holiday season after all that's okay do you do you know anything about it no where are you? Not even not off the top. I'm in. Guest room number two. Well, no, I'm saying I was saying what state I didn't really care that you're in the second guest room. I think you were trying to brag of the size of your your house. Yeah, yeah. Precisely what I was trying to do.

I was trying to denote socioeconomic status of me and my loved ones. I'm in North Carolina, a state where you cannot gamble online. Oh, you must be. Much to my chagrin. No, I mean, I think you needed a little break. I did, yeah, because I wouldn't have gotten anything regardless. Um, so we're good.

Where are you? Wheeling West Virginia, dude, as always, what was the back that your backdrop looked interesting? And we were just talking to the aloe plant. Yeah. What is that nestled? What is that sitting on?

Perched on. We just talked about this oh that was recording okay okay yeah it's funny it's an aloe plant baby scale dude uh i've been home and i've gone out to dinner with like three family different families that are family friends of ours and this we've had the same conversation over every dinner i don't want to say names but every bus driver every school bus driver in wheeling have you heard about this yeah they're the town players every school bus driver is fucking somebody's wife at the bus depot oh my god so like different dinners someone's wife i thought they were always someone's wife at the bus depot oh my god so like different dinners someone's wife i thought

they were always someone's wife but like they're not secret about one guy showed me camera footage of a bus driver holding hands with somebody's wife wait this is a school bus driver thing and multiples every school bus driver is fucking somebody's wife nick the school bus driver has historically been the least fuckable type of employed person in the world hollywood would would cast someone like chris barley and make him more disgusting to play a school bus driver dude so did we did we have the same school bus driver? It was a female? I didn't ride the school bus. I had

loving parents. I rode the school bus. I rode the school bus and I had a female driver. I'm like, oh, that's good. And they're like, no, she's fucking too. Oh, the women are doing it. The women are fucking husbands. They're picking. they're dropping off the

kids picking up the people they have so much time in their day and they're just taking somebody to fuck at the depot i'm more interested in what the their attraction what why people are attracted to them is there an extra allure of having the power and authority of transporting your kids is that like hot a big car they have a big ass car a big i have a really expensive car no i was at i was at multiple dinners and they were like oh did you hear about so and so and my mom's like no and then he's like oh they're fucking the bus driver. It's just been multiple, multiple, multiple times. Dad, do you know about the school bus driver thing in Wheeling? Recently? Apparently they're

having sex with everyone's wives. I think I got one. I know the school bus driver. Yeah, he knows. He knows for sure. No, and I know we make up stories on here, and I know this Yeah, he knows. He knows for sure. No, and I know we make up stories on here, and I know this probably doesn't help to say, but

I was flabbergasted. Yeah. Wait, was that your dad? Yeah, he's eating chili for breakfast out of a mug. Yeah, that makes sense. he's uh he made his twitter comeback semi-recently but he had a a grim ass post today in my opinion yeah so um he was in charge of the gifts and it was it was a disaster from the jump

this is like me getting the shirt that said, I love my dead mom was like, the was like the least weird thing that he did. That wasn't available on Amazon. You could tell, did he iron that on himself because it is so low. Wait, do you have it? Yeah. Fuck. I have it. I'll get it soon he made me try it on it's the lowest graphic i've ever seen on a shirt also can we put those in the barstool store we can yeah we got to get those up uh that's a piece my um my it was my girlfriend's first time here celebrating christmas with our family and my dad got her i didn't know about this a bunch of gifts wrapped and i was like what is this gonna be please just be like a gift card or

like something easy and it was it was my baby hair from my first haircut it was uh my hospital bracelet when i was dehydrated as a toddler and uh my home run ball the one that i hit out of like the the world's smallest field what field i've talked about this it was in paris pennsylvania and it was like a like a map it a 90 foot field. Those are like the things you give an FBI agent when a kid's been in custody. It was all like confiscated material. Your dad gave your girlfriend everything she needs to make a voodoo

doll. Yeah. But he never told her he was joking so she was like oh thank you it's like we had to act a prision he made her act a prision he gave away your baby hair

yeah it was like it said my first hair cut but it was just like 10 strands do you think it was actually your hair or did he just cut some of his hair he may he probably we'll have to ask him soon. Yeah, because we're getting them on later. Yeah.

What about your Christmases? My grandma got, for the first time ever, my grandma got mad at me. Oh, yeah. That's hard to do. She's tiny. She's really old. One step may as well

tiny when you say tiny do you mean like 30 pounds uh she's probably she's definitely double digits 25 pounds yeah she my grandma's my grandma is 16 pounds, 5 ounces. I have a minuscule grandma. She's quiet. She'll just fall asleep. She'll sip tea. She's a grandma thing. Last year, I got my special needs uncle a weapon.

I got him brass knuckles last year but i was able to tell my grandma it's the only reason you can buy brass knuckles in west virginia is because they're sold as belt buckles so they're not illegal so i just told her it was a belt buckle and he didn't really know how to use them and she just was like fine with it and this year i got my uncle who lives in the same apartment retirement, kind of like, uh, assisted living home as my grandma. Yeah. Uh, I got him the sword that gladiators get when they're freed. Okay. Like, but like not wood. I got him like the metal one. It's like Damascus steel. It's folded a thousand times.

It has a beautiful ripple. and he opened it loved it he got so so mad and as she was scolding me he cut himself you got your you i mean you got your uncle with special needs he's he's the big sword and his biggest his biggest issue with you know being an adult is coordination

and yeah I got him a pretty big sword and it was like yeah and I didn't get him like an Amazon one I got it I got it from like big sword and it was like, yeah. And I didn't get them like an Amazon one. I got it. I got it from like a blacksmith. Oh my God. Yeah. And I got it. I, yeah, my grandma was, was mad at me,

but my uncle loved the sword. That sounds like the hardest ever Elden ring boss is like a mentally challenged guy with a huge sword. Yeah. It's like, it's like your character versus the stumbling uncle. The stumbling uncle sounds like it's like a martial arts form. Dude, I'm going to call up that establishment and have them confiscate it.

No, so she tried. My grandma tried to leave it behind, but I snuck it in the bag and then I had to carry in the sword. Where's dad? He left his mom. Did mom leave too? I'm going to send my mom. How much did Uncle Kenny like his sword?

He loved it. Grandma didn't like it. No right uncle kenny yeah i mean that's a perfect yeah man oh that's great yeah mook rudy you guys just lost bets nothing to be happy about no i mean i also weirdly have a brain damage specialty oh yeah i was gonna say and if you don't have one time to look in the mirror you probably are the one oh yeah wait kyle are you um motherfucking henry probably believes that i've been where is henry's your black nephew i've been trying out new characters what are you trying to be like that like the ice tea or the mr t of to him like the uh wait what what is the what besides their race what is the comment what is the correlation of iced tea i feel like they're very similar like like they're regarded in the same way by the youth i don't know if the youth knows anything about mr t or even iced tea

i guess yeah i guess like when we were youths i I still don't think so. Yeah, I don't know. I guess, yeah. He probably doesn't know what I'm doing. How are you trying to be like Ice-T? Well, I don't actually know anything about him. I think he's like a stereotypical cool,

not really white like unk. Yeah. So you're trying to be an unk? Yeah. You should try to be like Shannon Sharp. In what way? I don't know what he does. He's an unk. Yeah.

Yeah. Did anything happen? Between us? What did you get him for Christmas? The Amazon wish list. I just got him. What? It was one of those things.

I just got his. He has an Amazon wish list. I just checked off the boxes. Okay, okay. Yeah, did he build it himself. How old is he? No, it wasn't like, it wasn't like something you can build. It was like a toy. That's exactly what it is. It's a toy called the Amazon wishlist.

I don't know. I checked out, dude. I, uh, Wait, where did you buy, where did you buy the Amazon wishlist? I didn't, I don't know. I just, buy where did you buy the amazon wish list i didn't i don't know i just i was sent his amazon wish list and i just did a power play and like buy now a few of the things okay yeah it's a power play i think he got them a little bit early like a week ago all right guys look at my face it's bushy as all hell but if you were to see penis, which you can't because you're on YouTube, not because it's small, it's hairless. It is completely, completely, completely shaved. And that's thanks to the manscaped.

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a complete reset of everything healthy I've done in the past year oh literal cheese I had yeah it was non-stop shoveling cheese it was what got the smoked gouda got me oh my god the

the truffle the goat truffle got me yeah the uh the asiago the gruyere gruyere what about fontanella chevra it was i was in charge of the the charcuterie board and it was all cheese for me it was it was non-stop cheese there was like six acts of cheese. There was a cheese intermission where I took a break from cheese, but I just spent that time cutting up more cheese for the charcuterie board. And I lost it. And then I injured myself in the cold shower doing air squats today.

I pulled something in my chest. So we were supposed to record at 12, but we had to push it to 1230 because... I was debilitated by the cheese last night. Woke up still feeling the effects of the cheese. You did my... Hold on. Hold on. I'm losing you.

hold on hold on we're i'm losing you yeah i was i was talking about all the cheese you're debilitated by the cheese i was talking about there was like six cheese i ate too much cheese woke up still felt the effects of the cheese you had perfect connection you had perfect you had perfect connection for all that i said there was what got me i said the the truffle goat got me, but the gruyere... Shut the fuck up. The chevron and... Yeah, right. It was like...

But certainly you didn't take an intermission. Oh my god. Dude, I was eating cheese around the clock and I took a cheese intermission for like 30 minutes, and I spent that intermission cutting up more cheese for the charcuterie board. And then I woke up today still feeling the effects of the cheese. I was like, all right, this cheese is going to affect me internally. It's going to affect my bowels. It's going to affect me internally. It's going to affect my bowels. It's going to affect my organs. I didn't know the cheese was going to affect my physical functioning.

I got in the cold shower, did my first body weight air squat. As soon as I came up so fast, just something collapsed in my chest. Like I felt like I got the wind knocked out of me. Something was pulled. I couldn't get full breaths in. I was in a cheese paralysis. In the shower, you were in a cheese paralysis with the cold water hitting you?

No, I managed to get out of the shower, but I couldn't walk for a while. Did you collapse? Yeah, essentially. I was walking with a hunch all day. Because you hurt yourself air squatting in the shower. Did you take a peep of your ass? Did your ass still look good?

No, I came out from this bathroom. I'm fat as hell. I'm 175 pounds. This is the most I've ever weighed. That's the same exact weight as me. I'm 5'6". I'm a midget. I'm a manlet.

You're 6'3". Yeah, it was a bad cheese year. Or a cheese week. It was, yeah. Did you gain 20 pounds this week? No, but if you want to get to it, the beginning of 2022, I was 147 pounds.

Oh my God. Yeah. Did you gain 30 pounds this year? Yeah, in two years. That's not bad. You look good. I don't know. I'm just wider. Nobody's going to notice.

You just got to get back to Chicago. There's not much cheese there. No. It's so good. Oh. No. So good. Oh, God. Should we get Winoy on? Yeah. How should I do this with the headphones? I think you just turn them off.

Yeah, because I can barely hear myself with these Beats Pro Flex. He's flexing Beats on us. Dwight Schrute Oh shit Doug Winoj Kyle do you want to lead the interview? Wait till you hear who Doug Winoj even is

Oh yeah We need to get that out of the way first What up? Here we go. How we doing, Winoy? All right. Who's this guy? That's Nick. Nick, you look like the wolf.

We've met a lot of times. You look different, man. Wait, how do I look different? I saw you... What's that got to do with the top of your head? It's like more oval. Your head is like an egg more. That's a compliment.

That translates to a compliment in our language. He's the good-looking one? Yeah. That's me. Pleasure to meet you doug that's reed he's our intern what's up reed yeah and rudy i know don't joke with reedy wait rudy rudy you know all right hey uh how was the cheese yesterday doug

i ate too much cheese you probably didn't even notice. No, I was doing a lot of the shrimp. Yeah, a lot of the shrimp. Plus, it was good. It had the veins on it. I love the veins. Yeah, the veins are the obvious part. You just suck it up.

Yeah, suck it right out. Do you do it hands-free? I use my tongue. Yeah. Just suck it right out do you do you have to do you do it hands-free i use my tongue yeah like just suck it right out yeah then you gotta floss up because it sticks in your teeth yeah you could use the tail of the shrimp right um so before we get into you well no we're going to get into you right now i guess uh what What, what did you give Kyle's girlfriend for Christmas? Oh, Oh, when we were looking for Christmas decorations, I seen Kyle had a first hole run ball. Like 10, like 11. Right. Yeah. Do you, do you remember the field?

Do you remember the field it was at? Yeah. It was in Bergerstown. It was close to Bergerstown. Yeah. But you were like, you had kids in your team twice the size of you remember the field it was at yeah it was in bergestown it's close to bergestown yeah but you were like you had kids your team twice the size of you yeah so it counted it was pretty much right right and you i think when you rounded first you didn't even know it went over right yeah but it was a short field it was like a hundred right yeah what else did you get she got she got k Kyle's first hair when they gave her her first haircut I didn't even know we had it

it was in a little envelope you know who cut your hair it had to have been Lisa was it Lisa Seidler no it would have been Lisa Tolbert it was probably Tolbert every Lisa in Wheeling is a beautician Seidler? No, no. It would have been Lisa Tolbert. It was probably Tolbert. But they could have been it.

Every Lisa in Wheeling is a beautician. I had more Lisas on my sky than anyone in the world. And then there was this wristband. I remember the day he dehydrated. Puking so much at night. So we had to take him to Wheeling Hospital. And this is when we were new.

And I had to go to work. So Jeanette drove the car with him. My mom took him in the hospital. And I said, don't worry, I'll walk home. I had to go to work and get the other car. I got lost in the woods. Nick, you know how the woods from our village in Bethlehem connects to the hospital? But it's rugged woods. Nick, you know how the woods from our village in Bethlehem connects to the hospital, but it's

rugged woods. It is untouched woods, and it is a vertical climb. He tried to track that. I looked up the hill from Wheeling Hospital, and I go, just go straight,

and I'll hit somewhere in Bethlehlehem but four hours later and it was getting dark and it was cold i was a grilled guy i was nervous i was and then deers were running around me and bobcats and maybe a mountain lion i was i was losing it you know where i ended up the rich guy's house in bethem. The guy who owned Cornette Foods. Yeah, the wellness center guy? Yeah, Long's. Right, Long's house, yeah. Wait, so yeah, you were pretty far away from home even then.

Yeah, I was all disoriented. And I was covered with them things that stick to your clothes. Briars, yeah. Briars, right. And my hair they're all over me why didn't you just walk on the road because it looked quicker if i did a straight line yeah pythagoras yeah oh man okay uh we got that out of the way kyle said, wait until you hear about who Doug Wanoi is.

Who is that? Do you want to? Oh, the genesis of Doug Wanoi. Doug Wanoi was a college buddy of mine that I met from La Trobe. His name was Doug Wano. And whenever I got in trouble in school, after school, and probably to my 30s, whenever a cop stopped you or someone, I would just, they'd go, what's your name? I'd go, Doug Waino. And I constantly used his name.

I even used it in hospitals when I broke my hand and bones because they didn't have computers back then to check. So I would always have a fake. Wait, why would you use a fake name in a hospital? What did you break your hand? What did you break your hand? What did you break your hand on? I punched a guy in the head and I broke my hand. So you used your buddy's name. Right.

So anyhow, I felt bad because he went on to become successful. Yeah, Doug Wano is like a respectable, decent dude who has his own career. So I just put the Y at the end of it, just so I wouldn't use his name. Doug Winoy, right? That's all. Yeah, yeah. It's super different.

There's no way they can connect those. But is the photo you? That's another. When we were in college, we lived in this house that was built in the 1800s. And there was an old abandoned well uh that one day i said well what the hell is what she was in it so they opened up the metal thing that covered it and they they dropped me down in a rope down there and so it was way down and so

when i got to the bottom i saw rats running around and i was getting nervous i said bring me back up and my hands were all wet from the water down there i couldn't hold the rope and i kept on slipping down into the water where the rats were and i was i was starting to scream at everyone uh so they found an old tire this just took about two hours to get me out of that well it was about 50 feet down i forgot that you were stuck in a well right so that's my face how happy i was when they finally got me out of the well that's what it is i popped out yeah so that's a picture of you hold on i'm pulling it up that's a picture of you when you got out of a well for two hours i was almost crying down here because the well paved in like every time they got close, dirt and rocks

would fall on my face and my back was just completely scarred. You were not in a well that was starting to close up. Yeah, it was. It was abandoned

for years. If you can look into the pictures, you'll see how it happened. So you were in a well about to get buried alive? Right. I thought it was

just like the worst situation. You're buried alive on a pile of rats Right, yeah Oh, it's disgusting Wait, what rat were you in? It was the Thetas

They're no longer there They got thrown Closed down Yeah But before Before you were Doug Benoit on Twitter You were using that alias Yeah, I was using it

On message boards. Yeah, that's right. When did you first start trolling? The trolling started when I moved to West Virginia, and I worked out of my house. I had a business, a collection agency in my house. That's right. I forgot about that. Yeah, right.

I never knew what that was. You had just people coming in and out of the house and working on the computer. Yeah. But so I was bored most of the time. And that's when the computer and the internet were starting to just evolve. And, you know, I remember you had a log on. It took like 15 minutes just to log on. And I would go on AOL message boards, stock message boards,

and troll other people about stocks. They would go crazy. I bought this stock and it went up. And it was just, it was fun to watch on the after they got at me and yelling and screaming. That was my first troll. I love

doing that. And then you... That was the 90s. I love doing that. And then you... It was the mid-90s. Oh, that was early. Were you the first ever internet troll? I don't know, but I enjoy people getting mad at me. He likes that.

Right. Yeah. I like to have a clear ending where people forgive you and they understand it's a joke. He doesn't like that. No, no. I like to hate and then i started doing twitter folks it's time to get it twisted and i'm not talking about the facts i'm talking about the tea the twisted tea it is one of my favorite

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Hey guys, Nick went 10 seconds short on the ad read, so I'm just here to remind you to pick up some twisted teas. You'll like this, Nick. Yeah. McDonald's was my first tweet, the one in Elm Grove. I don't know if you remember. They had a maintenance guy. Wait, wait. This is in what era?

I'm going to see. I'm thinking 2000. when did you go to college remember they had the ronald mcdonald statue that sat down with his legs crossed he would finger it yeah the maintenance guy there okay what was he doing it was a guy who was always smoked a cigarette and he would take a a hose and clean the drive-thru lanes. So one day I pull up to him, and he's right in the middle of the lane. I couldn't get my order, and me and him were just having a stare down. I go, are you going to fucking move?

And he's just looking at me, just hosing right in front of me. So then I took my phone and took a picture of him. And then I said, I'm going to post this on twitter and make this guy i didn't know i didn't even know twitter was gonna be famous but just the guy staring at me so i took my camera right in front of me took the picture and that was my first tweet of him uh blocking the lane is it still up he would um he would do all the maintenance for mcdonald's he's probably gone by the time you guys were there. I don't know. Then I would go to the sheets and I would take the

picture of the lady who had a thousand badges that she won for doing good customer service. I remember her. She talked to you constantly. I'm not real sneaky. I just put it right in front of her and snapped the picture. You love taking pictures of people in public.

Yeah, I do too sometimes. But wait, wait. So was the, was that just, you just decided to take pictures and post them? Did you put a caption or anything? Well, my, my whole Twitter thing was weird people, convenience stores and fast food places. That's it. That was my first. I would go to Arby's. I would go

to all the places and look for the weirdest people. There's no better place than Wheeling to find that. It's full of great characters there. Then I think I stopped and I got my first DM. Some guy in Howard Stearns.

What the hell was it? You were in talks with Eric DeMeggio. Eric DeMeggio. I don't know if anyone knows who Eric DeMeggio was. I covered my talks with Jules. He could sleep at my house. He loves strip joints. And he kept on DMing me, I'm going to be coming this week.

And then I shut it down. I didn't want to deal with people. That was weird. That was that. That was that. That was weird. You know what? No, no, no. I keep going.

You know more than I do. Before Twitter, you were doing Facebook groups. What were the Facebook groups you were trolling on? No, actually, the Facebook came after. That was the one when i got covid i had all this free time and uh i'm trying to think the first one i did this obviously the snake the snake identification yeah the bicycle yeah so wait the snake one was you would post pictures of venomous snakes well i i called them poisonous because it gets them all gets them all

mad they don't like they're not poisonous or venomous so i would purposely called them poisonous because it gets them all mad. They're not poisonous or venomous, so I would purposely call them poisonous. I would purposely post pictures of me holding venomous snakes, which you're not supposed to do. You would find other pictures of South African snakes. Right, holding deadly snakes and stuff like that. Anything to get them mad, I'd do that. Then I went to the metal detecting. He loved the metal detecting. Yeah, one of the biggest things

the metal detecting is protecting in national historic grave sites. And I was just saying, hey, I went to Gettysburg and I found all these cool things. I don't know what they were and i posted over bones does anyone can anyone identify them and they i mean i had a thousand oh yeah they were the matter right i know why do i keep finding these wooden things and they're all bones

of soldiers from the civil war the metal detective community does not play so you you convince these people that that uh are passionate about the civil war that you desecrated a soldier's grave i kept on going are these are these things worth anything have you ever gotten a death threat no i probably i thought you know i i probably had people that wanted to kill me or arrest me yeah the more the more the worst of that i love it when they do that yeah and then you got notoriety for pickleball uh-oh there we go uh yeah pickleball because i knew a lot about it so it was easy to get. I know, I know what gets people mad and that that was going on. In fact, that's when the guy wrote the article about me.

Right on the pickler. Right. Right. And then do you have some of the all time tweets pulled up? Like Kyle was saying, like, he'll be mid-conversation with you at dinner and then he'll see that you tweeted while you were talking to him does it take precedent over like dinner with uh with kyle it's like this it's like uh did things pop in your head and if you don't do something it goes away so quick it's all about timing right i don't know how it works yeah you got to catch them early

when i was practicing during covid just before you guys outed me um wait did you say when you were practicing oh you would oh i was i was my hone of my skills what do you mean you were what do you mean you were practicing well i would practice what got people pissed off and i would tweet a hundred just hundred times just to see what people got them mad and politics was the best that was that was when uh trump and uh and biden were going at it now i'm going to ask you a question in my bio for twitter i put the opinions of doug are a combination of several people right not me would that get me in trouble i don't think so i don't think so no because it's not my opinion absolutely not it's not your opinions at all no no no no and but

wait your bio right now though is feminist i hold my coffee cup with two hands i hate when people go like this oh yeah we both take the genetic genetic disdain for the people who cherish their coffee like it's right like it's not coffee. So because it made you mad, you put it in the bio. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Because it'll make other people mad.

Probably. I hope. And then and then your header is lettuce. Yeah. What is the lettuce about? I was trying to disguise myself

from being noticed. And I don't know. I forget forget what that was i didn't want anyone because i'm so embarrassed of what i was doing oh that's got a head of lettuce as the header that can't be greg bauer wait what did uh when you were in the peak of it what did what did mom well mom didn't know um because and it was because you definitely found this guy right here nick you're the one that outed me yeah of course we needed something to talk about right right right yeah it was uh i had to calm down after that because some of the stuff probably was bad i don't know yeah yeah but then some of the stuff it kind of got worse for a little bit right right yeah

like uh you're megan rapinoe you know he started getting recognized right uh like the airport and what would you do when like you were embarrassed to admit to your friends that you were like an internet famous my friends these are these were my Jeanette's friends they were not I'm going they're in the bathroom and this guy comes up to me and he he he figures it out we're talking and wait how does he figure how's he figure it out well I was wearing a shirt and he that's besides the point he's wearing a doug lenoir shirt no way probably just do me a favor when you when my because they're like looking at me they're fringe friends right and they don't know they don't know about doug lenoir so i said act like you're a famous

star in some stupid movie that no one remember so when they came over over and I go, yeah, this guy was in this movie. I wanted the picture with him. I didn't want them to think the guy wanted the picture with me. But was it a Doug Winoy shirt? Yeah, he made his own.

Wait. The guy was I think it looked like a home agent the dude was wearing a Doug Wynne it said it said like I'm looking for Doug Wynne

it said it said like that and it yeah oh my god we were Utah yeah I was in Utah Utah

you would get recognized when you're driving Uber, too. Well, it's my fault. They get extra tips from people. If they were young, between, I'm saying 19 to 40, they get in the car, and I could tell that they were disheveled, like a terrible beard, a little bit of smell to them from drinking too much. I figured that they're Barstool fans.

Yeah, that's fair. And then once I established that, I started working on who do you like, who do you like, who do you watch. And once I zoned in on you guys, Anus guys, anus, yak and other things. I would tell him, I won't, I'm KB is that, and I, Oh,

the tips would just go crazy. They would, if they didn't hit me that I think they're going to think, uh, so a couple of guys, I guess knew I'll be not many and, they wanted their pictures taken and stuff like that. But the money I made off of your guys is like,

this is unbelievable. Yeah. Thank you. No, somebody has got to do it. Did you just hear my stomach rumble? stuff like that. But the money I made off of your guys' like this is unbelievable. Thank you. No, somebody's got to do it. Mook, did you just hear my stomach rumble? No. No, you didn't. No, because I'm full. I'm filled to the brim with Factor. I'm home. I don't want my mom's cooking.

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head to factor meals.com slash kb50 and use code kb50 to get 50 off that's code kb50 at factor meals f-a-c-t-o-r-m-e-a-l-s.com slash kB50 for 50% off. That's a really, really, really good deal. Factor Meals. Yum. Oh, man. So, well, what's next? You tweeted out the T-shirt you got Kyle today with the too low of low. I didn't get it.

My daughter, Lauren, got it. I didn't get it. Yeah. Your sister got that for you, Kyle? She did. Actually, I'm slowing down when uh jeanette uh took a turn for the worse yeah i lost my i lost my ability to find things funny anymore it was weird and i also lost the use of my appendix it just both things stopped immediately. I'm not being serious.

I always wondered, and I was going to ask you straight up. I'm glad we have the medium and we have the place to put that out there. I Googled it even because I think this is ridiculous. And it'll come back. So right now, I don't think anything's funny so there are pills that you could take right now do you correlate uh arousal to being funny no i think the combination of what happened i lost my i lost my humor and I lost my youth. Yeah, I'm glad

you shared that because, you know, a lot of vulnerability to admit that. I was going to ask you, like I said. You were going to ask off camera. Yeah. You actually had it you had a written

on a card to give him at christmas and you you cowered you you chickened out of giving it yeah perfect storm uh right it's the a's yeah is this the a's yeah if you can't talk about stuff like that in a right you can't talk about it right. Exactly. Exactly. So is it true that you started a second account? Did we find your second account? Oh, yeah. Who is that name? We outed you immediately. Dean Devlin.

Dean Devlin. Yeah. What I was trying to do with that is there was a reason why I did that. Oh, yeah. I wanted to get back into the real bad trolls that embarrass my family. And it wasn't working. You got to start from scratch. But right now, the political climate is too calm. I think next year, when things get really crazy, Devlin will take off, I think.

Where'd you get the name Dean Devlin will take off, I think. Where'd you get the name Dean Devlin? That's another combination of two guys I know in high school. Yeah, I don't say his name. Dean DiGiacomo. And so on Devlin. Right. Pete Devlin was my boss when I was, when you come back from college, had a summer job yeah he definitely

was my boss it all we did was drank every day and we worked for the road department in new jersey and just drank and he was the greatest boss we just drank and drank all right yeah so i'm sorry for outing you if you start another one i swear we won't we won't out you we'll let you get your takes off. Oh man. That was satisfying. That felt good to answer some questions. Yeah. Anything, anything you want to promote? Yeah. Nothing at all. Yeah. I have a list here of some of your greatest hits, I believe.

But what are some that you're proud of? Which troll jobs are you most satisfied with? I guess the one that usually nobody, like no one famous will respond to me. I mean, because that one lady, Salamai, what's her name? Soledad O'Brien. Soledad O'Brien. And the guy who responded, the cook? The chef. Jose'Brien. Soledad O'Brien. The guy who responded, the cook? The chef.

Jose Andres. Real quick, right after that, the most famous chef, and I even trained under this guy, and lo and behold, he responded to it. Right. My Christmas was the day you discovered how to use polls on uh on twitter

i don't use what the polls the polls you would put you would put everything to a poll just like all right let's put it to a poll all right all right here's a couple of my the best ones that never that never made the anything because they got buried you know when you when you do it too late i had some great ones that they're just stuck in there and no one ever responded some really good ones one of my favorites is uh jamelle hill quote tweeting the uh prize committee that judges uh black life in the u.s and you said wow so much for diversity to a one hispanic and one trans female and someone said which two are black americans and you just zoomed in on two white guys

i'll tell you what she's tough she will not respond to anything she's really smart she won't budge who's your white whale of trolling well it was her actually it was before you guys outed me it was going to be Dave because Dave responds to anyone but then now that

I don't want to get involved you know what I mean with Barstool so I stopped doing him so wait you were trolling Kyle's boss now that I don't want to get involved, you know what I mean? With Barstool. So I stopped doing him. Um, so wait, you were trolling Kyle's boss behind Kyle's back. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. But now I can't do that. Yeah. He'll respond back and forth. Uh, who else did I do? Uh, I forget.

I, I gotta look back. Uh, give me another one. Yeah. What else you got? Yeah. Uh, me another one. Yeah, what else you got, Mook? Yeah. One of your biggest most often is at a guy named DC underscore Drano.

Who's that? I don't know. DC Drano? He must be some political guy. Yeah. You responded to him one time. He was talking about Bud Light and about how it's going to go bankrupt. And you said, warning, I bought my 14-year-old child a tuck-friendly swimsuit for a sixth-grade pool party.

Somehow my child was aroused while on another boy's shoulder chicken fighting in the pool. The tuck flap restricted the natural movement of his genitalia causes a painful penile fracture I mean I remember that but I don't know why I did that yeah that has nothing to do with the tweet does it nothing when I'm drunk I do some bad ones right

and then this one is this is a classic at Hillary and Chelsea Clinton. It's a picture of them riding bikes as kids. And you said, you need to wear helmets. I took a nasty fall riding my bike on route 80 in North Jersey back in September,

2019. My COVID mask accidentally covered my eyes. Approached T-neck New Jersey. I hit a broken down car on the side of the highway. My right leg was then hit by a cement truck. I think that was a picture, a real picture of some guy. I think I posted on there. Yeah, I remember that.

Yeah. I don't think they're my good ones. Yeah. You got Rovell real good, too. Yeah, I remember. Yeah, he fell for it. He fell for it. Yeah. What did you get Rovell real good, too. Yeah, I remember him. He fell for it. He fell for it. Yeah.

What did you get Rovell with? What was it? A bus driver thing? I drove a bus for some basketball team? He was tweeting about a throwback basketball game, and you said you were at that game in 1968 with your grandson. Chester was a big fan of Luau Cinder after the game we hung out

sorry for the confusion I'm helping Pops type the tweet he was almost 100 and then Ravel was like well if he was a grandfather in 1968 he's a minimum of 110 now he blocked me he was my first famous person to block me, right?

Okay. Got the Ravel block. No, but it was worse than that. I tweeted him a picture. He likes memorabilia. I tweeted him a picture of something, a ball or something, and he retweeted, oh, that's great. Then I said, oh, I also have a picture of i like

someone's underwear that i got and he that's what he blocked me right right oh my god is dean devlin gonna try to get him are you do you have the he hasn't responded i have i figure out you gotta send one thing nice to him so he responds and then on the goods and then send something really stupid to him and then he'll get all yeah it's perfect oh my god uh anything else mookie uh not on the twitter front i did have a question about uh you mentioned the collections agency were you in on the detective business with uh kb you brought that up yeah we my brother devised this agent's detective agency oh ardvar so you guys would show up first in the alphabetically. Yeah. And we, I think we had three jobs.

One was to get the blood type of a guy who was in a fraternity suit. And I called, I remember calling them up. This is pre cell phones. I, the guy, I got his number. I called him up and I said, this is so-and-so from the county blood collection agency,

we're just making sure we have enough blood supplies. I just need to know your blood type. And the guy just hung up on me. We blew that one. The other one was my brother had to follow some lady who was supposedly cheating on her husband husband and he got beat up real bad my brother he got beat up by the by the guys by him he got beat up he's a black guy he's not he's a tough guy i know he always gets beat up yeah that was yeah the guy found out that

he was following the girl and then he got beat up. So we didn't get any money on that one. And the other one was we actually got paid. Back in Newark, New Jersey, a real, real bad section. They needed a guy needed to watch his construction site. So there's no way I was going to do it. My brother wasn't going to do it like all night. So we, I found a guy, Freddie, who was a fit the mold of Newark. And I hired him to work there at a reduced rate. And so basically he did it for two weeks. Nothing ever happened.

So I think we each, me and my brother split 50 each the money we paid freddy you know just to do it we we made we netted i think we netted 50 bucks each and that's when we ended the agency those those were so can anybody just start a detective agency we had we did nothing but print business cards that's it that's it. That's it. No license. Nothing. No insurance. Nothing. And then you just put it in the phone book. We put it in the phone book and like I said, we got a bunch of calls

but we couldn't do half of them. Yeah. You went one for three on being a detective? I guess you just hired a guy right yeah oh my god that's amazing

that's amazing you got anything else Mookie I have a few more tweets if you want to go through them but do you just have the Megan Rapinoe one yeah let me find that like I don't know what's... Let me know if any of them are bad. There's a few where you can't...

You don't want to go too hard on trans. You don't want to go too hard on sexualizing people. Yeah, I don't know. You may have tweeted, like, an ass before. Like, someone's ass. Yeah, you did tweet somebody's... You tweeted somebody's ass once.

Yeah, I don't remember that one but you you just go it's just you googling random oh you're not actually taking pictures of someone's ass no no you guys told me the one that wasn't right was it was the actor the asian actor yeah yeah that one wasn't right the kung fu guy jackie chan he bruised jackie chan and i said i don't remember he was complaining that his famous oscar winning didn't get help and i said but jackie can't should have enough money for and you said that was bad i didn't say that lauren and you yeah yeah you did i think you did text him over the jackie chan one kyle yeah that may i don't know i don't know i just don't want you to i think you're fine now i'm actually no but no your dad getting canceled would be so funny because you would just start another account. Nothing would change. It wouldn't matter. He's retired.

What's going to happen? I have the Rapido tweet. I think she did, but she was too afraid to spoil it because she was spoiling yours. Nick, I'm not going to say she liked you a lot, but you were the cause of a lot of stress in her life. Whose life? You used that c word you make how bad like saying f words and shit like that you were bringing out a lot of the lewdness i was almost going to church until you said met you was on yeah that's that's that's my bad he was on the path to god and i ripped him right off of it. Right. Yeah. You were something. I didn't know you were that bad.

Yeah, I've always been. He swore he was a good boy. I know. No, I've always been bad. I've just been sneaky. Kyle never said the C word until he met you. I don't say the C word.

You said it to everyone. You always say that word. No, I don't. Remember Erica? You said it to her. Oh, yeah. Oh, Kyle said that. I didn't. I, I don't. Remember Erica? You said it to her. Oh, yeah. Oh, Kyle said that. I didn't. I would never. Yeah.

Does your mom ever get mad at you? Oh, yeah. Constantly. Right. Yeah. Constantly. I do keep doing it. Yeah. Mook, rattle off the Rapinoe and I think we end on Rapinoe. Yeah. Mook, rattle off the Rapinoe, and I think we end on Rapinoe.

Yeah, I'm on 10% on this film. So Megan tweeted out, she's like retiring. It was a baby picture of her, and you responded, as a youngster watching Megan dominate the game, I assumed she was a trans female, faster, stronger, and tougher than any other female athlete. Megan was my hero. I didn't need to change to compete. You will be missed, and other than the flag incident,

you were perfect. Thank you. She was so good, you assumed she was trans. All the time. That's not bad. You said being a trans is not bad. Yeah, no, it's not bad. It's a compliment. I gave her a compliment. That's a big compliment who is uh chloe bailey that's just a right-wing pundit that responds to everything right okay yeah yeah between i've actually got friends with a lot of uh liberal people uh because some of my tweets i act act like a barista.

I have so many people DMing me about keep up the good work and shit like that. I hate Republicans. I hate Democrats. I hate liberals. I hate conservatives.

I hate politicians. It's disgusting. I like chaos. I hate conservatives. I hate every, I hate politicians. Right. It's a disgusting idea. Yeah. I like chaos. I want chaos. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Team chaos. That's a, that's a beautiful sentiment. Sentiment. Thanks for doing this, man. Thank you. Yeah. Thanks for coming on. Thank you. It won't be the last time. It won't be the last time. Kyle, you're on 2%. So I, yeah. Oops. Sorry. Yeah. All right, Nick. Thanks a lot. All right Oops. Sorry, Rick. Yeah. All right, Nick. Thanks a lot.

All right. See you, Greg. Have a good one, boy. Yeah. Take care. Bye.

My phone's about to die. Yeah. I'll just do the ads and I'll wrap it. All right. I appreciate it. All right. Thanks. See ya.

Thank you. Later. All right. That was the episode with Doug Winoy.