A New Untold Story - The Ringer 2 - A New Untold Story: Ep. 353

Episode Date: July 20, 2023

The sequel to The Ringer is coming to a pool near you. Also, f Gibby Norton. Ads: Bearbottom - Get free shipping on your first purchase at https://bearbottomclothing.com/STORY Gametime - Download ...the Gametime app or go to the website, enter your email, and redeem codeUNTOLD for $20 off your first purchase (terms apply).You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/anuspodcast

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Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey, a new untold story listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen to ad-free on Amazon Music. Check, check, check. Perfect. Cool. Yeah, we're good. You want me to reject your reply to what I'm going to say?
Starting point is 00:00:15 No, you're just going to say, like, no, that's a new untold story. Hey, is that story old or told? Fuck no, baby! That's a new untold story episode 342 episode 353 we're looking at a brand new area code what's southwestern and south central wisconsin What do you mean by brand new? The 608 or whatever the first one was. It's almost taken up. So, I agree.
Starting point is 00:01:10 Any more numbers. Wow. Yes. So? That's the area code. Very cool. 353 Madison, La Crosse, Waukesha. They're going to get me.
Starting point is 00:01:23 They're going to get me. At pronunciation. Sauk City. Ooh. Nice. wakisi they're gonna get me they're gonna get me at pronunciation sock city nice so madison and lacrosse are the primary cities okay yeah you want me to continue that's it continue all right cool uh i have to read an ad that can't be on youtube sorry youtubers madison beer and duke lacse. There it is. There it is. You want me to get it? You son of a bitch. Have you guys heard of Lucy?
Starting point is 00:01:57 Yes. That's Sweet Potato Pat's wife's name. She's very pregnant right now, but I'm talking about Lucy. The nicotine gum. And pouches. And breakers. There's no tobacco in them powerful nicotine and delicious flavors but their breakers are the next level nicotine pouches you just post up in your lip or say it feels better than actual nicotine it releases the sweet sweet nicotine uh breakers will have something no other pouches do they have a
Starting point is 00:02:21 little capsule inside each one so it's like the camel crush of pouches. You break it with your teeth and release the nicotine way faster than other pouches. They're heftier than other nicotine pouches and they don't get all wet and slick. Like what? Like a pussy, I guess. Yeah, like a pussy. They're not self. They don't have like a mucus.
Starting point is 00:02:43 Like a pussy. I guess like a pussy, yeah. Not to mention their gum tastes and feels like normal gum if normal gum had a nicotine kick. You agree, Big Red? Oh, yeah. Big Red, yeah. Stand up, Juicy Fruit. I'm a hot tamale motherfucker. That's not gum, bitch.
Starting point is 00:03:05 What? Visity.com oh lucy.co I'm sorry lucy.co and use promo code anus to get 20% off your first order shipping is always free there's a 30 day refund policy if you change your mind that's lucy.co promo code
Starting point is 00:03:22 anus to receive 20% off and always free shipping i will send us some of those yeah what's not advocating for sobriety but fellow ambiverts do not develop a cannabis habit ambivert ambiverts are. Or introverts. And extra? Yeah. Getting off it has been a bitch, but I feel so much better now. The desire to interact
Starting point is 00:03:53 with people has come back. I flushed all my Zaza too. I had an episode. Yeah, it's just, I didn't realize what it was doing to me. But we're feeling good. Like I'm feeling good. Feeling good.
Starting point is 00:04:07 Yeah. I'm happy for you, man. You're falling asleep normally? No. Oh. Still no, but it's getting better and better. And it just happened to overlap with my anal itching. It's at its peak.
Starting point is 00:04:21 But I thought you just got the cream. I got the Paracacura which is a miracle worker but it can only do so much it's still dry it's still burning is it specifically for an asshole paracura yeah it's rave reviews shout out to i think it's just a new development out of minnesota and people have been asking what can i do about my rectal itch what can i do about my rectal itch uh preparation h isn't doing shit yeah it's not vaseline isn't doing shit yeah of course paracura is gonna be your friend and how much are you applying a day way too much it says pea size i'm going about i'm going like black eyed pea size will i am
Starting point is 00:04:58 i'm gonna worry about size glob in your head and um i'm so afraid because i when i'm over when i'm gonna worry so much i was globbing your ass and um i'm so afraid because i when i'm over when i'm like i'm waking up every 45 minutes because of withdrawing from weed and by the way withdrawing from weed overlapping with my peak rectal itch i did have that on my 2023 bingo card i knew this was gonna happen and last night i ordered. I had to Instacart late night, like an ice cube tray and Z-Quil. Did you have to sleep with an ice cube in your ass? Just in case. Just in case. And so you could sleep through it.
Starting point is 00:05:36 Right. Are you scratching your ass bare? Like your bare ass finger to hole? Well, the people in my position, we're not going to continue with this. We're not going to continue with this. But paracure will be your friend. Well, I kind of want to continue. Are you scratching bare ass?
Starting point is 00:05:53 You have to sometimes. And the more you do it, the better it feels. But then it's like a fucking catch 22. And then it just tears it up. But we're on the right. That index finger is looking like Stanley Yelnats, dude. All right. That then it just tears it up. And, but we're, we're on the right. That index finger is looking like Stanley yield. That's dude. All right.
Starting point is 00:06:09 That's it. That's it. That's all I got on that. All right. Well, how's your asshole feel today? It's getting better and better. I went to the gym before this,
Starting point is 00:06:17 which is a new tactic. Okay. To like, uh, it makes me feel better when I'm podcasting to do something harder than podcasting right before. Which is anything. Not really.
Starting point is 00:06:27 Mentally, it's not. Mentally, it's not. I did Anna Nicole's until my forearms croaked. Nice. Kind of spoilery, but like we were supposed to do this episode from Nimrod Street. Brawley wasn't feeling it today. Yeah, it was in the works, and it's still in the works. Still in the works.
Starting point is 00:06:50 We're going to go out to Nimrod Street. But for being such a good sport, we were going to try to get him something. And we were going to try to get him a game system. And I had Mook DM him, like, hey, man, do you game? And Brawley just answered, I can't move my hands. He says, I can't't move my hands he says I can't fucking move my hands bro I guess he mouthed that
Starting point is 00:07:12 yeah yes we owned you yeah but he said he does game he has an adaptive controller yeah like Xbox does that adaptive controller yeah like is it Xbox that does it? Xbox, PlayStation.
Starting point is 00:07:27 I think they all have them. Okay. But it looks like a DJ set. It looks like a turntable. Oh, cool. Yeah. So maybe we get them a VR headset. Bottom line is we're getting him a gift.
Starting point is 00:07:39 We just got to figure out what he can enjoy. What do you get him? Yeah. What do you get for the quad on Nimrod? The only thing I come up with is a painting. Yeah. Come on, dog.
Starting point is 00:07:53 I mean, it's not the best idea, but he can look at a painting. I mean, what about it? I mean, we've put this guy through hell. I'll get him a TV,
Starting point is 00:08:03 a computer. Tell us what you want. No, he, cause I don't, he's, he's too humble. He's too humble. We got to get him i'll get him a tv i'm a computer tell us what you want though he because i don't he's he's too humble he's too humble we got to get him something good and we're willing to chip in all of us yeah yeah and he's going to host us and he said he said like did he say he had like leftover pizza at his place he would buy us pizza yeah hell yeah yeah he's the man for sure but we'll be doing that before we he was gonna first off he was gonna come in today that didn't work out. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:08:26 Did you prepare? Did you. Were you going to roast him again? I started to, but I'm going to wait. I'm going to wait. So I just scrambled and tried to write other news like a couple hours before. OK. You want to start?
Starting point is 00:08:37 You want to start with that? Yeah, sure. This one blew my mind. Big congrats to Jay-Z's mom who married her longtime partner. Yes, Jay-Z's mom is a lesbian. Congrats to her on 100 problems now. I have an idea for Jay-Z's next album name. I can't say it, but let's say it would rival Kendrick Lamar's damn.
Starting point is 00:09:02 It's like the opposite of a damn. I don't think I'm allowed to say it then. Am I allowed to say that word? The opposite of a dam. I'm still trying. Like the water dam. Rhymes with pike. Yeah, thank you, Rudy.
Starting point is 00:09:16 Oh, fuck. Yeah, I forgot about that. That use of that word. Jay-Z says a lack of a father figure is the reason he turned to crime as a teen. It was probably his mom that taught him how to hit a lick. Now, Jay-Z's mom being a lesbian is crazy. I didn't know that at all. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:09:33 I didn't even consider him having a mom. Let alone a lesbian mom. Yeah, that's crazy. Yeah. Is she old? She has to be old. She has to be very old because he's very old. He's 50 be old. She has. Yeah. Very old because he's very old.
Starting point is 00:09:47 He's 50s in his 50s. Her name is Gloria Carter. But how often do how often do lesbians have kids? He's destiny's child. I didn't write that one down. I just wrote all these today. So some of these are more topical than ever. Due to parents working from home, summer camp enrollments have been at an all-time low, and experts think that this will take a big toll on kids socially.
Starting point is 00:10:17 I mean, kids won't know how to make s'mores. This one's just marshmallows and chocolate. Where's Graham? Yeah. marshmallows and chocolate where's graham yeah uh a motel owner is getting destroyed online after a guest complained about loud prostitution from a connecting room uh only for the owner to recommend earplugs he just sent back a link to earplugs the only people that should be recommended recommending hormone blockers are preschool teachers. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:47 Wow. Yeah. Wow, those are the only three I have. That's great. I had them ready for Brawley, but... Do you... I mean... If you want... Nah, nah, nah.
Starting point is 00:10:56 We'll wait for him. It'll be the first time we have three people from Wheeling on the pod. Familiar. There it is. You returned to Wheeling. I did. Yeah. I went back for Thursday and I came back Monday.
Starting point is 00:11:15 I was in town for the Steelers softball game. Mm hmm. We saw. Yeah, I know. I don't I don't run like that, dude. And I so something happened and i shouldn't have worn the leggings but i did that was fine i was around too many black people to have a swastika tattoo on my leg that's right the run i mean yeah it's i think i think my hat
Starting point is 00:11:38 was yeah what was that you ran like keep on like the manga kid who who was running from the anime kid you ran like the kid the manga kid who just got unfrozen for the first time in tag i was running like i was running yeah only one arm was doing a thing while the other one was good form half of my body was good form half of it and then they throw your ass at shortstop yeah uh second i was in the lineup for shortstop jerry took it um but But then there was just a lot of lefties on the Steelers team, so I had a fielding error, but that thing was coming in fast. Yeah, those are hard to catch.
Starting point is 00:12:12 But only one error for me. Everybody else was... Yeah. But we lost by 10. That's not great. All the athletes on our team dropped out the day of. Matthew Judon and Kenneth Walker were supposed to be on my team. So I just had girls on the team.
Starting point is 00:12:26 Yeah. Some two chicks from different reality shows. A girl from A Love is Blind. A girl from Perfect Match. Yeah, they can't be good. They weren't great. They weren't great. Neither.
Starting point is 00:12:42 One football player. I was playing on second, so I was trying to like talk and make jokes. And I won't say what football player it is. But he didn't like it had been delayed to rain. And then we came out there and there was a double rainbow. This guy hit a double and he was fast runner, but he was winded. He was I won't say who it is, but he was winded after the run. He was like he was fast runner but he was winded he was i won't say who it is but he was winded after the run he was like he was running for miles and um i was like dude do you see that rainbow
Starting point is 00:13:11 and he was like yeah man and i said i don't you're gay and he did not fuck with that at all that's awesome yeah yeah but that was cool uh and then the day before the day before uh jerry invited me to like a box at a pirate game and i got to bring my dad and that was cool we made that we made the tron dude oh what you did you like what you do i was on the jumbotron for two seconds but it was a pat fryer muth so everybody started yelling muth and then just i got one person tweeting at me there's like hey man don't worry about it you weren't awkward at all at all i was like oh fuck that's like that's the only thing in my head as soon as the game starts is what i would do if it came on me
Starting point is 00:13:54 yeah what wait what is your jumbotron what i don't i still don't have one you'd be you would panic i would try to be a beer chug guy you have a beer i would just like make out like a real sloppy make out it cuts to somebody else goes back to you you're still making out now you try to do something fucking that you've never like you try to heal click shit now you try to do something fucking that you've never like you try to heel click no it was cool that was a fun experience glad i got to do it was for charity love charity uh yeah i've been fucking with those guys more and more yeah especially as i get older yeah for sure it's just important it's like why not why not yeah and i i always i always give a little bit more than you but i like that you're doing it too well you don't know what charities i'm giving to what are you giving or you should i make all of mine public if you're on my venmo
Starting point is 00:14:55 why the fuck am i donating to operation smile if there's no share tweet yeah no come on me uh mook when's the last time you've given be honest uh oh i give every year to a 9-11 charity run that goes a run for the cure we gotta cure this thing man no it's uh a buddy of mine's aunt uh died 9-11 and she was from northeast philly so every year they host a run and uh the proceeds go to northeast philly high school i like it how they like it's always like let's fucking run for miles instead of just like let's have like having like a dessert feast
Starting point is 00:15:45 yeah yeah I would pay for that that's like a beef and beer type of situation a what a beef and beer like something horrible happened something that everyone hates happened and then didn't to raise money we're gonna do something that everyone hates yes yeah instead of like um
Starting point is 00:16:01 I think video game tournament misery loves company so if this person's dying of cancer you're gonna like run and get like a stitch in your side for a little bit like damn like i feel for them i feel for them penn state thong they make you stand on your feet for 48 hours what is that shit i did it in high school it's called penn state thong i know like people have like they'll get they'll take it personally if i talk shit on them. Oh, it's like their life. It's a cult. Yeah, people make it their entire personality.
Starting point is 00:16:28 When I got a C and D from Phi Sig, they were like, you can make up for this. I hate that that's true. I hate that that's true. You can make up for this by donating to Tron. Yeah. No. No, I would, but.
Starting point is 00:16:44 I wonder, that's not. how you told me to do it. You're going to be participating in it next year. That's what you've given, though? I've given, yeah. Dude, I'm sorry we put you on the... I give enough for the both of us. You're good. Yeah, you're good, man.
Starting point is 00:17:03 Honestly, take the credit. I don't even care. I'm down cool rudy you move soon yeah are you packed no not at all okay i packed up some clothes your apartment is fucking sick you don't have walls it's all glass so yeah it looks like a museum wait what are you going to do to it looks like an aquarium i have no idea i haven't had to interior decorate since i've lived in New York. So I don't know what to get. Do you have any nudity on your wall?
Starting point is 00:17:32 Currently? You have to. Yeah, like tasteful. No, I don't. No, you have to. You have a tit. A tit. It's always like the most. It's like the most.
Starting point is 00:17:42 The tasteful pussy on the wall is like. Is this like side pussy? Like how it. It's like the most, it's like the, it's the, like the most, the tasteful pussy on the wall is like, is this like side pussy? Like how it, it's like a, no, it's like, it's like a old school boob. It's like a hand drawn old school boob. No, I actually go, I think I actually go even more beyond that. I think a boob would be, I have like a, just a drawing of like a woman's face. Okay. And I think that's honestly like more creepy than a boob like it's like almost like i think if somebody if my apartment was like preserved let's say like
Starting point is 00:18:11 pompeii happened and everything's covered in ash and mine was like they cracked open the door and they explored it 4 000 years in the future they historians would debate if women existed back then there's no signs of women life. Like there's no I don't have any music with women, no records with women singers. I don't have any posters with a single woman on it. They probably just thought it was men, stegosaurus and like wiggly tough. Yeah. The only thing that possibly could hint at it would be if they found your skateboards and mistaken it for a paddle.
Starting point is 00:18:46 Maybe that's the huge stretch that there's nothing they could look. If my TV was still working, they could look at my recently watched movies. It's just Lawrence of Arabia. There's no sign of women. They would have found your 3D printer and thought that you were trying to make a make a make because there were none left. Because that's the first thing I tried to make. I never got that built and I just had to get rid of it because I'm moving soon. And it's just it's's just a waste yeah fuck my my entire mind though on moving has been trying to figure out how to get my pc moved and it's not easy it's like very
Starting point is 00:19:16 delicate you probably have to buy like a wooden box i might have to do that i mean there's definitely like very expensive like you can get like a pelican case for like $400, but I'm putting like, I'm making like chemical reactions happen. I have to get this thing called Instapack and you like crack it like a glow stick and it like expands. So I have to put that inside the PC, but there's like, it does it very quickly. So then I got to put the glass back on it and then I got to put that in a box and I put bumpers on it.
Starting point is 00:19:39 That's insane. And then I put that box inside of another box. And it's still going to break. Yeah. And I also just realized I have a fucking telescope. I forgot I had a telescope. I don't know how the fuck I'm going to pack the of another box it's still gonna break yeah and i also just realized i have a fucking telescope i forgot i had a telescope i don't know how the fuck i'm gonna pack the telescope but it's impossible to own a telescope without looking creepy a hundred percent yeah because that's what i would do is look into windows hope to catch people fucking yeah but i absolutely yeah well i i asked for a telescope because my old apartment had a really
Starting point is 00:20:04 good view of the water. And I legitimately like to just like look through the telescope and everything. And I thought it was going to be like a little telescope. My mom got me like a like a lunar grade planetary telescope. This thing, you can see the pores on people's faces. That's what you are doing. You're looking at faces with it instead of on the street on the one New York City. I can't look at the stars.
Starting point is 00:20:23 There's so much light pollution. So having a telescope in Manhattan or New York City is strictly to look at people. Yeah. Yep. And you have one powerful enough that if you caught a man's urethra, it would look like a Guatemalan sinkhole. Yeah, dude. It's intense. I just kind of stopped doing it because I was like, I don't want to be this guy.
Starting point is 00:20:42 But just by the fact of having it. A lot of windows are just open to look into in new york i think that's like a thing a fat an exhibitionist thing or maybe they want to be caught fucking has anybody ever caught you fucking i have just like one third of like uh of like a painting you know those like paintings that are three pieces a triptych a one third of a triptych of the the world map and it it doesn't really cover wait you have that in front of your window i don't i want i don't care about getting caught fucking that's like the fourth thing you obviously care very much no but it's the fourth thing i'm most afraid of getting caught doing. Coming? It would be jacking off, which I don't do.
Starting point is 00:21:28 It's still a big fear. It's like an intrusive thing if it ever happens. Torturing my cat or scratching my asshole. Torturing my cat is not a euphemism for jacking off. It is me just fucking with my cat not sexually those are the three things like you want to do in the process i would rather yeah that would be less more embarrassing than getting caught fucking how how animated are you when you're scratching your ass or you don't discreetly well i'm not under the covers because
Starting point is 00:22:00 when i'm withdrawing from weed i'm sweaty sweaty as hell. Oh my God, dude. It's been a pain. What's the longest sesh you've gone with like a single scratch in there? I hate talking about this. You've been talking about this for years. What was your line? You said the best was when I would get high.
Starting point is 00:22:20 It would feel 10 times better. Smoke weed and scratch your asshole better I would finish this podcast and I'd be like I just cannot wait like the last 20 minutes if you look at like podcasts when I was on the weed you could see in my head
Starting point is 00:22:37 I zone out I stopped responding to you guys because I'm just thinking fantasizing about hitting the stizzy going home scratching my ass then eating food and then q-tipping my ears and then watching tiktok you'd like raise home to scratch your ass
Starting point is 00:22:54 yeah yeah oh man uh today's episode is also brought to you by bare bottom clothing bare bottom is one of those popular not mine it's covered in shit not shit it's covered in like fucked up things like what it's the most popular clothing brands at barstool their gear is uh go-to at the office the home especially when we're traveling i wear their flannels and their tees all the time a lot of their tees i wear their tees i wear their tees i the time. I wear their tees. I wear their tees. I wear their tees. I wear their tank tops. Why'd you say three tees? I was trying to.
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Starting point is 00:24:21 We're in the right room. I saved a tweet, I think, of this person. They were just like, signs you have autism. And they were just things. It was like clicking the pens. Oh, I saw that. Yeah. No, no.
Starting point is 00:24:37 So what I'm saying is these people, no, that's not a sign of autism. We need to put out a TikTok of just like, we'll do like five things you didn't know were signs of autism and they're just like regular yeah they're just like regular things like uh going up uh the steps and skipping every other step yeah or just very very basic things people would believe that what else they're throwing out autism diagnosis like no no i saw that video. I want to put it in a stimulation in one of our next clips. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:10 Yeah. Let's do it. In a what? Like a stimulation video on the bottom of our. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I was just on Clemmer's podcast that you were just on. And I don't know if it's spoiling it.
Starting point is 00:25:22 Or did we did two Olympic movies. We did Miracle and The Ringer. that you were just on and i don't know if it's spoiling it um or did we did two olympic movies we did miracle and the ringer and uh the ringer needs a sequel bad i kind of forget how it ended uh it was it was a happy ending it was a wholesome movie but it was it was a it was uh non oh do you come one of us sneaking into the special olympics neurotypical okay yeah and then um i think they should do a sequel where one of those guys tries to sneak into the actual olympics that is amazing it's just the ringer too just like how far he's going up against phelps i mean the he stops phelps by just jumping in and drinking all the pool water phelps has to sprint from one end of the pool
Starting point is 00:26:12 oh yeah but i thought yeah when i was watching it last night for the podcast i i was like this needs a reverse that we need a reverse ringer now there is uh well that was the guy that you look like after four beers oh yeah you tweeted uh down syndrome bodybuilder. Yeah. And you quote tweeted it and said me after four Bud Lights. But you sent us a picture of that bodybuilder. And I think I said, oh, yeah, I said that's the most dangerous mammal. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:26:59 Yeah. I was thinking like, you know, his grip. I mean, he's the strongest man on the planet. Bedtime. He doesn't want to go to bed. Bedtime is impossible. Yeah, wait. What did you say the scenario was? Bedtime when he's not feeling it would be the like hell for his caregiver.
Starting point is 00:27:19 Oh, my God. Yeah. That guy. Oh, that strength. Yeah. odd yeah oh that's strength yeah um was he in a what is he in like a division is there a crew of him i think he's just competing he might be reverse rendering he's shredder he might be doing it yeah yeah you could have some work to do yeah like physique wise i'm sure his strength is insane yeah i feel you you know what i'm saying oh yeah my grip is god god awful my grip strength you don't know how to move your fingers i just started doing anna nicole's it's and i can only do 10 and then the next set i can only do three and then i'm my grip is fucked for the rest. Completely shot. But let's look at
Starting point is 00:28:05 today in history because today is quite the day in history. Okay. July 20th. 1944. What happened? Rudy should know. World War II.
Starting point is 00:28:22 Assassination attempt of Adolf Hitler. Yeah. Did you know about that yeah he had an old school one and he cut his speech short 20 minutes early 20 july plot yeah the leader of the conspiracy claus von stauffenberg planned to kill hitler by detonating an explosive hidden in a briefcase it only slightly injured him you think that made him mad yeah yeah you think he wanted to kill claus von stauffenberg definitely you how yeah he killed everyone hitler had ordered that those found guilty should be hanged like cattle what's hanged like cattle hanged like cattle is that like beef like yeah like a piece of beef so they put the hook in their ass i don't know but
Starting point is 00:29:03 you know what that's like? They're upside down. Oh, they're upside down. Hanging by their feet. I think that's how St. Peter got crucified, too. That's right. More than 7,000 people were arrested. You'd probably love that. Yeah, it would scratch the edge.
Starting point is 00:29:14 Yeah. Come on now. 4,980 people were executed just for having the slightest connection. Oh, my God. Imagine being like 4 000 removed from him and it's like i have to die like five there's no way it was like two thousand hitler was closer removed than some of these people like four thousand to five thousand
Starting point is 00:29:37 and then claude was i think he got an easy way out he was executed via makeshift firing squad I think he got an easy way out he was executed via makeshift firing squad I don't know that's what it said makeshift firing squad they just gave random people guns I don't know he was just shot
Starting point is 00:29:55 hmm interesting stuff what else in history Claude von Stauffenberg CBS tried to fuck over Hitler but he I'm not even going to finish that he has the receipts Wadwan Stoltenberg. CBS tried to fuck over Hitler, but he... I'm not even going to finish that. No, wait, I want to see what you're doing.
Starting point is 00:30:07 He has the receipts. He had the receipts. This is coincidental. 1968, the first ever Special Olympics. Whoa. Began at Chicago's Soldier Field. 1,000 athletes from 26 U.S. states and Canada competed in track and swimming.
Starting point is 00:30:27 Swimming at two events, including 25 meter races in track and field at four, 50 yard dash, 300 yard run, standing long jump. And there was also, it says there was also a softball throwing event. I don't know what that was. I'm assuming it was the overhand hurl not like the jenny finch windmill yeah like see how far they can just throw a softball that's cool 1969 we have anything else to add on that i don't i don't i figured yeah yeah i think that's great that that's like a very good movement that's all for i'm gonna start donating the first ever the first ever i'll refer you i have a code you have a code yeah that's why you have a donation code to don't a promo code to
Starting point is 00:31:11 donate yeah yeah um when we're wheeling remember we tried to say that wheeling what did they have we said a guy from wheeling invented the curse of f yeah Yeah. I was talking about the Special Olympics. Oh, I don't remember. That was a while ago. What do we have? We said something like, who was it? I don't know. 1969.
Starting point is 00:31:36 Moon. The moon landing. This is all the same. All these huge events. The same. One of them, I guess. Yeah, they're quite different. Yeah. That's crazy. Yeah, they're quite different.
Starting point is 00:31:45 Yeah. That's crazy. Yeah. And you guys know who did it, right? Who landed on the moon? Buzz Aldrin? Neil Armstrong. It's not the typical first person. Yeah, you should say Neil Armstrong.
Starting point is 00:31:56 Really? Yeah, you went Buzz before Neil. How would a pair of, how would Brawley do on the moon? How would Brawley do on the moon? He would succeed. That's like, yeah, he's a rover you're like r2d2 okay sorry bro sit legs week 2012 2012 this is fun the Dark Knight Rises was released in theaters
Starting point is 00:32:29 yeah 2012 James Holmes open fire this is today this is all today movie theater we don't know that I've been nervous in movie theaters since sports give me something US Opens open women's golf atlantic city country club
Starting point is 00:32:51 sandra palmer wins her second major title by four strokes sandy sandra palmer now what would her drink be um i have a feeling you're gonna say no I was trying to think trying to think of something sexist okay um let's workshop this something lemonade and tea
Starting point is 00:33:16 is an Arnold Palmer I'll get to it what are some lemonade brands Mike's Hard Minute Maid Simply We'll get to it. What are some lemonade brands? Mike's Hard. Minute Maid. Simply. Hers would be Minute Maid.
Starting point is 00:33:36 And Blouse instead of tea. You're the biggest idiot in the world. mine would be lyrical lemonade and tea grizzly and i was trying to think of other celebrities what their drink would be okay i got like magic johnson would be simply simply simply lemon simply lime and riptide rush there's different aids oh my god next will yours be oh no would i mean have to be fago and um what else oh no never mind i can take it i don't i didn't have any uh gibby norton's would be Orange Crush. Gibby Norton.
Starting point is 00:34:47 Who's that? Who's that? Gibby Norton. He's a geek who had a crush on Velma Dink. There's a real stretch. No one knows Gibby Norton. Gibby Norton doesn't even have a YouTube video he's in the the archives of the of the files no one knows who gibby norton is
Starting point is 00:35:13 yeah he's i hate him i hate him no one knows enough to hate him like me talking about talking shit on gibby norton this has to be the first time he's ever been no mentions um oh my god and one other thing um fucking gibby norton come on dude and apparently he's like also evil sometimes it's what his bio says what is sometimes evil he's voiced by eddie deason oh that's a shitty name it's the same guy that voice voice the annoying kid in polar express oh um Express. Oh. Gibby Norton. Fuck Gibby Norton. He looks like a Gibby Norton. He has such a
Starting point is 00:36:11 big crush on Velma Dinkley. It says he has done many unwise things to impress Velma. I don't know what that means. Yeah. One Gibby Norton. But Gibby helped kidnap the band Simple Plan.
Starting point is 00:36:29 Okay. That's an event that happened? They were kidding? Alright. No one even fucking knows. No one gives him credit for that. Yeah, all right. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:36:49 This guy's a real character, man. I'm not done with Gibby Norton. Fucking Gibby Norton. What do we got? 3C. Raving about 3C. If cannabis isn isn't if you don't like smoking weed and it's hard to get the three chi not only is available easier and more legally but it also makes you feel better than most weed all weed of all the things in life one of the best has to be getting high wherever you want whenever you want without the paranoia of consuming some sketchy black market bunk which you will you will
Starting point is 00:37:29 get from a dealer even if you're if you trust them if you're boys with them or if you are shopping around manhattan smoke shops what's the best way to get that great high from three chi it's with three chi of course three chi has the quality the highest quality cannabis products from their delicious they have the delta 9 edibles in all varieties candies baked goods even drink mixes in their industry leading delta 8 products to their new line of delta 9 lowercase o vapes and everything in between for all racing fans and cannabis vape enthusiasts i said racing fans because they are just now introducing well they have introduced a new kyle cush disposable vape i've tried it i loved it still love it um it pays yeah it's for kyle bush um it's a potent blend potent in a good way of Delta 8, HHC, THCP, and CBC.
Starting point is 00:38:28 The vape lasts so long. It'll get you high so many times. It's such a bang for your buck, and it's a good experience. So what are you waiting for? Race to 3Chi.com and order your Kyle Cush Disapposable Vape today. And while you're there, grab other Kyle Cush merch and definitely try some gummies if that's your thing a new untold story listeners get an exclusive 15 off so go to 3chi.com and use promo code anus15 to take 15 off your order must be 21 or older good ad read kyle good ad read thank you we have one left of that four show. Doing all right, guys.
Starting point is 00:39:06 Oh, man. One of the thing. Today's episode is 353. Yeah. So I was like, let's see who the Pokemon number 353. Oh. And it just so happens to be someone who if I I would give Dickhead of the week to easily, easily. This thing is the worst thing I've ever seen.
Starting point is 00:39:24 This thing is the worst thing I've ever seen this thing is the worst thing i've ever seen oh god um pokemon number 353 is shop it oh shop it's cool or in japanese kagabozoo shop it oh wait the mic what was what was it in japanese japanese or shop it or in japanese kagabozoo do it in like a Japanese deep man voice. But I accomplished that. Coco booze. That's better. Look at shop.
Starting point is 00:39:52 Do you have a schoolgirl now? No way. Never mind. Never mind. Look at this thing. You remember what it looks like or no yes ball spike on the head like dress thing underneath it i mean come on it's like a light purplish grayish ghost type pokemon that looks like it looks like a boner under covers not a boner in disguise a boner under bed covers that's exactly what it looks like um it's like a male erection emerging from some kind kind of
Starting point is 00:40:25 like unisac or ball of dough that's stupid tri-colored eyes no mouth and that is emerging from like a melted grape popsicle yeah truly the dumbest shit i've seen from the design stamp no way it evolves into bennett which is cool i It evolves into Bennett. Behavior, it feeds on negative feelings, which is kind of cool. Yeah, you'd want to have that. They congregate in large numbers under the eaves of the houses of people that hold long grudges. They enjoy pulling pranks, feeding on the feelings of sorrow or disappointment that often follow. So I like those features, those behavior characteristics. Yeah, you'd want that.
Starting point is 00:41:05 But we'll get on. In battle, they utilize the negative emotions they collect by pulling off moods like spite and grudge. I also like that. Yeah. And then here's where it goes sour.
Starting point is 00:41:18 They appear evil, but they actually act out due to their loneliness. Oh. What? That negates anything redeeming about the characteristic as a battle warrior. It's lonely. They're lonely.
Starting point is 00:41:31 Oh my God. That sucks. But that's all about, uh, shop. It's off it now. It's like, it's a ghost puppet.
Starting point is 00:41:38 Yeah. I like shop it. I don't, I wish, I wish that wasn't the dickhead of the week. If you, if that, if you were to do dickhead. I mean, Shuppet is a dickhead.
Starting point is 00:41:47 It's just a fucking stupid dick coming out of the head. God damn it. Oh, my God. I thought I had something else to bring up, but I guess I don't. Connor? What's up, Mookie? You were in Huntsville, Alabama. Huntsville, Alabama.
Starting point is 00:42:02 An interesting city, so I've heard. You were in Huntsville, Alabama. Huntsville, Alabama. An interesting city, so I've heard. Yeah, it was kind of weird because it was the South, but... But like a little bit of a nerdy element or what? Nerdy, but then you had the deep Southern people. The nerdy South? Yeah, because there were like regular bros, and then there were bros there that like, you know, love their guns and love Jesus.
Starting point is 00:42:27 So it was very interesting. It was a giant highway, but good people, really sweet people. Everyone was so nice. Did they like your jokes? They did like my jokes, but they didn't like they had like weird pain points. Like you talk about religion and they were not about it. Yeah, it's a Bible belt. You would talk about you would make fun of like Republicans and they were not about it. Yeah. It's a Bible belt. You would talk about,
Starting point is 00:42:45 uh, you would make fun of like Republicans and they were like, ah, not us like that, that type of deal, but great weekend overall for sure. Oh yeah. I got to get down there.
Starting point is 00:42:55 Yeah. Um, we got that email of, uh, talent that'll be coming into the office. I didn't mean to put that in quotes, talent, talented people that'll be coming in the office. And the other mean to put that in quotes. Talent, talented people that'll be coming in the office.
Starting point is 00:43:06 And the other guy from Florida, Georgia line is a potential. Should I answer the email and say we want him? What does that mean? He's the other one in Florida, Georgia line. Is it Florida or Georgia? It's line. What does he do? He divides the two.
Starting point is 00:43:21 He stands, he keeps those guys apart. What does he do on stage? He doesn't sing? No, the other guy sings and plays guitar. I think this is the cute one. I don't know the band that well. I'm sure that would go pretty awkwardly. I can't think of a single guest that would be good on this show.
Starting point is 00:43:41 Because of us. That's because of us, yeah. Josh Potter. Josh Potter. He's good. because of us that's because of us yeah josh potter josh potter he was good brawley but we're talking about like up people of like the fame of florida georgia line we need them to be above the florida georgia line i don't who is your dream guest jason derulo why he was awesome okay he was awesome listen to his any of his discography listen to it girl trumpets and tell me doesn't you and then watch his music videos that makes sense but he wouldn't fuck with us no um no no he wouldn't at all i don't know yeah i think i think we're we're more capable especially you than we're letting on to have a normal interview a normal comedic interview we could do it i want to just get
Starting point is 00:44:35 your family in here that's my dream guest you're a full full hand full hand what's going on family i muted them all uh i think the anus subreddit found bobo knows music yep okay um so they might be i haven't even looked at the comments of that oh my god it's not like our fans would spam the comments of something the blog was sick today what do you mean your sister blog today another one today oh yeah she's got to stop working so hard she's making me look like people think it's you and then they'd be like wait a minute no kyle would just put the blog for his job on his website you should just copy and paste your sister's blogs she's working harder than me at my job
Starting point is 00:45:16 i read the entire thing what is she blogging about she blogged about the all of your uh uncles and your aunt but then Let's just make the entire extended family very public. Oh, yeah. And she blogged about the card games that you guys host every year. The Christmas card competitions? We stopped, but yeah, those were epic.
Starting point is 00:45:38 What were the Christmas card competitions? It was a very intense, competitive, tear-inducing at times christmas card competition who was the funniest there was a comedy category and i think there was just a straight up best category for aesthetics okay and people would lose their minds trying to make the funniest christmas card uh bobo knows music. Creed part one is 250 views. Wow. Good.
Starting point is 00:46:07 All right. I'm pro that. No comments. Yeah, that's fine. Seven minute long podcast. Now there's one comment. Now this is how you podcast. Are they doing anything else or you have everybody?
Starting point is 00:46:22 I don't know. No, I don't have them muted. I'm just not checking. Are they doing anything else or you have everybody? I don't know. No, I don't have them muted. I'm just not checking. Yeah, they're all doing more content than all of us combined. I know. Come on. Oh, man.
Starting point is 00:46:41 What else, boys? We have to talk about the Ridge Room. Oh, Mook in the Rage Room. Mook sent us a video of him in a rage room you glided right over that too when you were talking about your weekend yeah you didn't say yeah uh sunday just like you glided right over that little tin cup that you were supposed to smash yeah i went to a rage room i don't have that much rage i didn't like have it in me to like spaz out and like go crazy um but i went to a rage room i don't have that much rage i didn't like have it in me to like spaz out and like go crazy um but i went to a rage room sunday before my flight just uh it was either that or the nasa rocket center so i was like fuck it i'm gonna go hit some shit you chose
Starting point is 00:47:16 why did you oppose that like it was like some fucking dummy landmark i was like what am i that sounds like the coolest thing ever the nasa what uh the space and rocket center oh the space and rocket center i went to rage and then i went to a dive bar and ate a burger but um yeah man i just don't have i don't have that inner rage in me to like go crazy i swung and missed on one and tore up my wrist and the other one. What did you swung at? What and missed? I swung at a coffee mug and I tried to go switch hitter and I rolled my wrist over and it's still fucked up. You don't have to have inner rage at all to have just the ability to break things. But you fail to do that on accident.
Starting point is 00:48:02 I got in there and I like felt awkward. I was like like i don't want to make a mess you turned it into a passive aggressive room yeah you yeah you turned it it's a room yeah brie larson looking ass i did fuck up a keurig though i went to town on a keurig okay i didn't send it to you guys but i you beat it with a bat? Beat the shit out of that thing. I went one for two at my at-bats as well. But mine were coming from some of the most elite athletes. Perfectly timed right over third. You guys did a rage room in where we're at.
Starting point is 00:48:38 Buffalo. Buffalo? Yeah. None of us hurt ourselves. We were trying to. Sweaty as fuck. Yeah. They make you wear the whole onesie, the jumpsuit.
Starting point is 00:48:45 Yeah. Yeah. Your hit would have went over the fence at the field that I hit my home run at. Really? Babe Truth found it. What? Somebody found your run? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:48:56 Well, I told him where it was in this unincorporated town called Paris, PA. I mean, if you look, I'm sure you can find it. And it's the field that is so small wait what is this picture the birth of DJ it's one of the cards oh my god oh yeah my family depicting the birth
Starting point is 00:49:17 you're you're so over this yeah you did not play along no you're just in it I hated that DJ was our little, the big brother, the little brother? Big brother, big sister. Rest in
Starting point is 00:49:32 peace. Yeah, he's passed. What? Yeah, it's sad. Yeah, it's really sad. But his life was significantly better due to my parents. So we'll leave it at that. Okay. I guess reading that jesus no don't laugh uh yeah it's you know a little levity come on
Starting point is 00:49:52 what little levity that's not a sopranos thing i think so did you ever finish that because that you loved that that was your whole entire life i don't finish uh shit that i love i just can't do it what do we have one more it's you just looked at it freaking out oh game time yeah yeah i mean all right so the for the people who still it's almost august and if you still haven't gotten tickets if you have a significant other, if you have friends, go to an event that requires tickets. I'm telling you, don't waste your life away. If you don't go alone, I'm telling you, if you're a loner, go to an event. No one's going to
Starting point is 00:50:37 judge you. That's the actual place to go alone. That's the best place to do it. And the exclusive ticketing partner of Barstool Sports is GameTime, created by fans for fans. GameTime is the ticketing app that makes it easier. Stop right now. Download GameTime for me and for you. That makes it easier than ever to score last minute deals on tickets to sports, concerts and shows. And they guarantee the lowest price. Hey, they guarantee it.
Starting point is 00:51:02 So you're going to get the lowest price. If you're going to an event, use game time. Drake's coming to town. That's already over. 21 Savage, the Eagles, Bruce Springsteen, SZA, Mets, Yankees, soccer.
Starting point is 00:51:16 It's possible with the game time app. The biggest last minute price drops can be found on the seats you thought you could never buy. Get close to the action. The purchase process just takes two taps 10 seconds that was like three so like a couple breaths and once you buy your tickets they're delivered discreetly oh directly to your phone um no printer needed skip the hassle enjoy
Starting point is 00:51:39 the moment download the game time app or you can go to the website if you're on a pc right now do that enter your email redeem code untold u-n-t-o-l-d for 20 off your first purchase we uh you got you gave your blood today i did i gave my blood last week i'm 100 gluten intolerant that's yeah your celiac which is horrible that's like a very severe life altering but you found out you're fat today medically fat um my height and weight i guess makes me fat overweight are you is that going to eat away yeah yes and the body the body fat i don't know he just measured my waist took my height and weight and then yeah come on and you're five six five seven there we go doctors have tried to tell me i'm five six i had to get second opinions third opinions
Starting point is 00:52:34 they said five sixth not today uh-huh no you're medically fat i was afraid to go do that and figure out more stuff but but giving blood scares me so yeah last year at this time or even less than a year i i gave blood and they're like you're you're at you're low risk high cholesterol i told the dot the guy up there today and he you should have saw his face he was like you were are you sure about that yours is shockingly low what the hell did you do you must have saw his face. He was like, you were, are you sure about that? Yours is shockingly low. What the hell did you do? You must've made some crazy dietary and fitness changes to your life. And I said,
Starting point is 00:53:12 yes. And he's like, wow. He almost shed a tear. Yeah, no, but okay. You know,
Starting point is 00:53:18 it went down. Are you going to lose weight? No, I'm trying to gain a little bit more. Be obese. Muscle. A little bit more. Be obese? Muscle. A little bit. I started eating some.
Starting point is 00:53:31 BMI scale is flawed. You're healthy at any size. Most of the time. Most of the time. What else we got going on? Anything? Any housekeeping? Nick, you said I have a bunch of housekeeping.
Starting point is 00:53:41 You said you had an episode on the Zaza? Yeah. Oh, of course. What happened? Nick, you said I have a bunch of housekeeping, but you said you had an episode on the Zaza. Yeah. Oh, of course. What happened? A little sleepwalking episode. Sleepwalking? Kind of.
Starting point is 00:53:52 I was like really high. I thought I heard something. I pulled out my sharpest blade and was walking around. I was freaking out. Yeah. I was having like a pain. Oh, you were asleep or you were awake? I got real high, fell asleep. A sound woke me up and I was just so disoriented. I sleep next a blade but it sheathed but i unsheathed it and was walking
Starting point is 00:54:08 around the house that's off of the stizzies yeah yeah those are no good was your partner there no no you were partnerless i stabbed her no longer um so you're just gonna stab me that was that's the fucking girl the black girl in the bear she's like the snarkiest thing that's everything she says oh so oh okay yeah okay richie yeah oh oh okay yeah she pisses me off. Yeah, me too. It bothers me. I'm sure the actress is lovely. Yeah, guaranteed. Her name is like Ayo. It is.
Starting point is 00:54:51 I looked it up. She's tall. She looks like she'd be short. She's tall. Is she? Like almost 5'7". Are you through? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:55:02 I watched it. I finished it. Good show. i watched it i finished it um good show again they're not an enjoyable watch by any means people want any show they're watching to be deemed as the best show of all time and if it's not if they if people are like yeah it's fine they get furious yeah why do you have to have an extreme opinion it's good yeah the only two opinions i see are it's the best show and then now it's not the best show kfc came out and they were like it's the worst it wasn't that's that's exactly oh yeah it was god damn no it's great it's black and white it's white it's a great show and uh yeah it's it's stressful to watch which i can see like i don't
Starting point is 00:55:37 want to do that i'd rather watch entourage probably but uh the christmas episode was phenomenal entourage is getting shit on online right now, too. For what? Not knowing how to write for women. They were just like, they just told. That's so Entourage, though. That's Entourage from the early 2000s that stopped. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:55:55 What's the girl's name? Sloan. They're just like, they're just, they pretty much wrote be hot on a piece of paper. Yeah. Get fucked by an ugly guy. E? E? Not ugly, but not.
Starting point is 00:56:05 You guys are quick to defend E. What the hell was that? I'm defending E on his behalf. If E's ugly, then you're fucked. What the fuck are you? You can't be doing that. Yeah, he's a redhead. Yeah, he's a redhead.
Starting point is 00:56:17 Ugly was the wrong word, but out of his league, for sure. Float is way out of his league. I wouldn't say. Yeah, yeah, he was. Yeah, she was. Yeah, she's out of everybody's. Yeah, that's true. She's mad hot.
Starting point is 00:56:26 But he was a cool guy on the show. Pull up her real name, the actress. Something like Anton Shigura Wagwa. It is a crazy name. Yeah, it is. What? Portrayed by Emmanuel Shariki. Yep.
Starting point is 00:56:42 Close. Wait, what was yours? I think I said the no country for old men villain yeah easily confused yeah yeah i mean it's the most not made for women show ever right yeah yeah well yeah i don't think you can think of a different show that is made not that is written less for women um yeah there probably isn't there definitely isn't yeah definitely chicks aren't watching rick and morty yeah they are i've never seen it dude madison beer loves rick and morty for real when it was cool yeah oh really yeah how do you know because
Starting point is 00:57:26 i'm a fucking huge madison beer fan obviously what does she do she's twitch streams now she sings i heard i actually have some of her songs yeah she's been singing for a while but now she's in the streaming game whatever happened to nike heaton like oh my god goat she was the original internet model she was that she discovered pizza right she discovered eating junk food in mass yeah she kind of she uh she also made music did like acoustic covers of pop that's how she got that's how she started out she did a song with migos she like played the ukulele and sing prettily and then she did a song with Migos. She played the ukulele and sing prettily. She did a song with Migos? Yes.
Starting point is 00:58:09 Or was in a music video or both. She was the first girl to look like that. She was the first. There's like that subreddit now, Centaur Girls, where it's girls with like big asses like that. I think. And it's she was like the first like she was like the first of the centaur girls. She was the first of her breed. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:58:28 Yeah. She would take you like the bed would be the hotel bed that she would stay in. The biggest, the biggest, the biggest jumbo pizza and donuts like covering her pussy. Like that was. And then like she even pioneered like Jennifer lawrence like hot celebrity women talking about how they eat a bunch of pizza yeah and everyone was like oh my god they're like i relate to them which is kind of a good thing then everyone turned on them the irony the girls and boys and then like us like us i think she's like a mommy influencer now oh good on her like Like your sister. She has a few kids. You and your sister should link. Yeah, they should.
Starting point is 00:59:07 I saw this on Mildly Infuriating today, the Reddit. Yeah. Where you post things that are like really infuriating. My stepdad takes pictures of fat people. My stepdad has been taking pictures of random fat people in public for like 20 years now. And he makes them screensaver pictures for the family computer i have asked him why he does it and how many pictures he has he said he does it because he finds fat people funny and he has a folder with over 3 000 pictures that's unbelievable that's not i don't i don't know if that's
Starting point is 00:59:42 mildly infuriating or just she's something i'm guessing she's fat uh but he has a fetish yes yes for sure setting as the wallpaper or he's just funny as hell could either or either or have you ever been caught taking a picture of somebody oh probably but you kind of like because there's you photo of a guy, Chloe Grace Moritz. Oh, that's the worst. Have you seen that photo? No. So she was like the like the incels really liked her because she was underage.
Starting point is 01:00:18 And she's like a champion of the opposite. Like she's an advocate for for women and hating men. opposite like she's an advocate for for women and hating men and she somebody took a photo of her but they left their flash on so she's
Starting point is 01:00:34 just looking right at the oh it's brutal that's awesome it's my internet isn't loading the photo but it exists she's just like she just caught the people but uh because you kyle took a picture of a guy in a jets jersey a very homeless man and what was the name on the back of his jets jersey i had to snipe uh wells fargo Fargo so clean yeah the Wells Fargo Jets what number was it it was like 82 yes
Starting point is 01:01:10 must've been the year I don't know but he was the guy was in the Wells Fargo Jets but I want to get a jersey I follow Javon Carter who is now on the Bulls basketball player went to WVU defensive stalwart but his dad that he threw out the first pitch at a Javon Carter throw the first pitch at a Brewers game and his dad went and he
Starting point is 01:01:30 was wearing the best jersey of all time and I need somebody to go to like the MLB store and get me one of these it's a Brewers jersey number 29 but the back says real black man and I want it so bad I need the real black man and i want it so bad i need the real black man 29 uh
Starting point is 01:01:48 could i wear that no i weirdly think that would be much more acceptable than if you had a real white man yeah you're right yeah or any race that's the most acceptable white man might be funny though yeah you have the cleanest getaway if any yeah black man the real black man brewers jersey yeah imagine like the high school kid having to make that for the zambian player's dad in the store is he like light skin what was he going for oh He's like a real one. Not like the new age. I think he's just like... What do you mean like the new age? He's trying to flaunt that he's a real man.
Starting point is 01:02:33 I get what you're saying. I get what you're saying. But you can't just say real man. That would make him seem trans. But real black man doesn't apply trans at all. Real black man doesn't apply any trans. Wow, you're right unbelievable and there's like a french basketball player which i don't think this is funny it drives
Starting point is 01:02:52 me insane his name is just like ho you're fucking fat or it's not his government you fat no his name isn't ho you fat his name's ho you fat that's just like that's so good that it's not so it's like this yeah it could have been divided by three ho you fat what do you mean divided by three like that's too funny that is not yeah your name is ho you fat what is his name this is last name or his full name his last name i think steve steve ho you fat it's only one word it's three words ho you fat why oh you there's no way there's no and it pisses me off because like wikipedia even claims
Starting point is 01:03:40 like that's we're so french guiana there's no way he was i know but there's just no way steve how you fat there's no fucking way that there was ever a line of how you facts spelled just like how you fat steve makes it even funnier yeah um muke what other housekeeping do we have uh greece week three years ago in july yeah we're gonna have to feels like three and a half yeah that feels forever ago yeah wow that was like six months into me working here yeah um another housekeeping in your sister's blog doug lenoir's birthday yesterday yeah did you remember? Yes. Yeah, I'm on. I'm fucking clear head.
Starting point is 01:04:28 What'd you get him? I still got a Venmo. My sister, the car camera. He wants to do like, you know, like you put it on your dash. Dash. Yeah. And you he wants to to do that is he going to make content
Starting point is 01:04:49 i'm sure for uber like he wants to do uber content oh my god oh no you know the guy the yeah yeah yeah god he's gonna he's gonna be huge and i can feel it yeah what else um piper check how's that yeah fine you like her annoying i love her yeah are you back to loving her always have yeah it's it's yeah what's she do while you're scratching her asshole yeah it's it's yeah what's she do while you're scratching her asshole she'd look like she will look she she oh she is if any of us anyone in my apartment me or my girlfriend go to the bathroom she's so fast in there loves to watch us like watch you shit loves to watch yeah just looks in awe and then loves to watch the toilet flush. I don't know how cats are. I think she might be funny, but I don't know other cats. She's fucking around.
Starting point is 01:05:52 Yeah, I've never seen cats enough to know what's standard funny and what's more funny than usual. I have two shout outs. Yeah. One for Sam Gruber. He found my parents on the beach in Hilton head. My dad was wearing a MOOC shirt and, he dapped up my parents and got pictures with them.
Starting point is 01:06:12 So shout out. He got pictures of your parents. Yeah. He's a big anus guy. Oh, hell yeah. Sam Gruber and your parents. Good for both of them.
Starting point is 01:06:18 And Papa MOOC and mama feel good moment for the, the folks. So do you, does your dad look like you or what do they think do you think you were in did he think that your dad was an anus fan or just he had to assume it was one of our parents just saw the shirt yeah i think the shirt is so polarizing that it's like oh i have to talk to this person yeah because like why else would you have it yeah um so i guess maybe he thought he was an anus fan okay so shout out to sam and then a shout out to my aunt pam oh big
Starting point is 01:06:46 shout out yeah for the phone call the facetime and then it continued after we were done recording you called her back yeah we did uh we did a tight 15 on uh jesus you're broken all the time yeah what was her pain points is she bummed about rfk's the leaked uh video no because she's a donnie donnie okay and she she likes rfk i had no idea he was married to cheryl hines who's that larry david's oh yeah oh shit huh what was the video though uh he said the vaccine uh only has bad side effects for white people and oh yeah chinese white people and black people it doesn't affect Jews or Chinese people oh
Starting point is 01:07:26 it's tough to win president with that it might be easy to win president he's done for there's footage of this yeah he probably has her screaming laughing especially after he had to fuck Larry David for so long that was a show laughing
Starting point is 01:07:43 uh yeah Kyle uh the interns came around today and they were just like hey if you were uh stranded on a boat with three people who would you pick who'd you pick madison beer glenn quagmire my girlfriend big three would you trust quagmire around your girl i mean we're stranded come on you gotta expect something fireworks would you be pissed if you caught your girl fucking quagmire yes yeah i laugh about it now but that would like ruin my life like i would not be able to come into the office i would like confidence would be shot um i would have a crisis god damn
Starting point is 01:08:34 someone dm me they said they saw a girl at a party in like je, Iowa wearing, uh, the until, until this bitch shirt. What? Yeah. Damn. Let's go. We're having such a hang up on the KB face shirts because they can't find a large enough image.
Starting point is 01:08:58 Like they even contacted Kent state for, but we're just like, make it blurry as well. That's perfectly fine. Yeah. I mean, we need that out. We need that out ASAP. We got to do some
Starting point is 01:09:06 discord love soon. Yes for sure. Oh yeah. I want to see more of that. Yeah. Yeah. I've been so busy I've
Starting point is 01:09:12 been traveling I've been ignoring the discord but I like all those guys I'll check in every once in a while. But yeah. Sorry. No.
Starting point is 01:09:19 Anything else. To content things out of order. If you're listening. Yeah. Watch that out. Sure. Nikki is in it. Oh. oh i might get in trouble for this sketch i think oh yeah i play a pedophile believe me you're allowed to do that yeah you can do that all right and then game night uh came out
Starting point is 01:09:38 yesterday oh yeah yeah yeah we're filming another one of those pretty soon um watch that it was just i was talking to kyle and i was just like when i first started working here i thought uh good content would be me being miserable and now i'm just starting to do stuff i like doing that that's fine too it's fine too yeah i'm still gonna do the miserable stuff yeah like this i like yeah i didn't give uh the w area, the southwestern Wisconsin area, enough love. I think it's one of the best areas. I've only been to Madison once, but from what I've seen and heard, it's one of the most underrated and the best areas in the country.
Starting point is 01:10:18 Wisconsin Dells, the French-sounding cities, Madison. I tried to find a football coach. None of them have an Instagram. The mayor's, Madison's mayor, Sasha Rose Conway. Hear me out. July 5th, but we're not doing her. But none of the other mayors had Instagram. What was the hear me out?
Starting point is 01:10:40 I don't know. I just had to say that. Okay. All right. Yeah. Props to them uh anything else boys what's what's the 19th no okay we're good no more housekeeping no more housekeeping all right god bless

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